AL

Alan Carr's 'Life's a Beach'

Keep It Light Media / Travesty Media

Quick Fire Round and Conclusion

From S10 EP18: Jane McDonald (Video Edition)May 29, 2026

Excerpt from Alan Carr's 'Life's a Beach'

S10 EP18: Jane McDonald (Video Edition)May 29, 2026 — starts at 0:00

I'm not giving up. I am selling the building . The final season of FX is the Bear . The restaurant is flooded. Everything's either gonna be okay ? No, no or not . We are outgunned and we are out man, but we have each other . FX is the Bear, the final season. All episodes now streaming on Disney plus . Right now, get up to fifteen percent off select storage solutions . Put heavy duty HDX tots to good use, protecting what's important to you. The solid impact resistant design prevents cracking , and the clear base and sides make items easy to find even when the tots are stacked. Find select shelving and tote storage up to fifteen percent off at the Home Depot to organize every room in your home, from your garage to your attic . Visit HomeDepot. com how doers get more done . And we're live from the living room as Doug eyes up the matchae spread. He's reaching for the buffalo wing. Perfect . Hang on, what's this? Oh, he's gone for a can of pepsy too. Incredible . What a finish . Sensational combination. Look at the delight on his face. There's no doubt about it , it just tastes better . Match days deserve Pepsi. Food deserves Pepsi. Grab a pack of Pepsi Zero Sugar for today's match. It's poetry in motion. It were you and me and then it wasn't Gock on the flock. Yes . Oh what? Can you imagine that? I know. If that plane went down, imagine the gay community I'm devastated . Look what we've got on board. It's Jane McDonald. How are you doing? Jane? I'm fine. Look can I turn left? Yeah you always turn bloody left. You haven't seen economy for thirty five years. Well, no, no, I know I'm right. I wish you all on a bloody boat . Are you permanently se c? No because I've got my sea legs now. You know, when I first started I was but you know, my mother just kept saying take the tablet should be fine and I did and I was. So there you go. Oh wow. And you know what? I've wanted you on this show for blooming years and finally you've arrived. I don't know what to say. Oh . I am smacked. You shouldn't be summoning me . We go back so long. We do, we do and you very kindly came to see me in Blackpool. That did. Oh, you're so sweet and I love it and that's why everyone loves you and that's why you're a national treasure and I know everyone says national treasure but you are a genuine national treasure. Oh that's very kind of yeah. And eagerly eared listeners at home will know that I'm slurring a little bit , but I have had quite a boozy lunch because I have been nominated for two Baftas. Oh wow. Most memorable moment with the traitors. Yes. And Alan and Aandmer's Greek job. That's a hard one. I know . Alan and Amanda. Alan and Amanda . And then I do this sitcom called Changing Ends and the boy who plays me is an up for best actor so I'm out of it. And I'm on so I'm a little bit emotional. Yes, you should. And I've got Jay McDonald on me playing. Oh yeah. Congratulations. That's incredible. And you've got a bafter as well. I have got a braft. It's amazing, isn't it? When you get I feel like Alan and Amanda's show has got that same warmth and authenticity that you have that 's why people love you, you know? Oh, right back at you. Oh yeah. The real love. That's what I'll like. It's turning you for watching Alice going on. It's a lovely, no, I've got some news as well, actually . I've got some news. Yes. My new album has gone to number one in the independent label charts. Living the dream. Living the dream is number one. Congratulations on my night. yeah. Oh, that's amazing damage in shock miso. Don't be stupid. It's just like what? What? But that's fantastic. Well, you deserve it. Thank you. That's amazing. Thank you very much. So we're having a lovely time. We've got lots to celebrate. And that's so good . Well, listen, let's talk about living the dream . So you're going on tour in this arena tour in it as well. Yeah . Wow. So what's planned? Tell me everything is there anecdotes? There you go. Because I saw Pink in concert and she flow around on a trapeze. Yeah. You'd be doing that? Absolutely . So then again, not with my blood of it. It'd get a bit dodgy that wasn't. Well, I saw you on that cruise ship. You said you're not and Bendy Wey. No, I'm really not a Bendy Wendy . You know, I'm really not a Bendy Wender. And it's embarrassing . You know, so no body's name is you. If I went spinning around it like a sprinkler You're right, you're right. It's not good. It's not a good look, is it? So let's talk about the album. You recorded it in Nashville. How amazing is that? It was incredible. Is it one of those places where when you go in the studio you just feel okay wow. Yeah well I started crying I got so overwhelmed really? Yeah because when you sort of walk in and I walked in on this wall of all the albums that had been recorded in this studio . And those like Taylor Swift, Coldplay, Wow , Garth Brooks , Reiba McIntyre, Dolly Parton . And I'm thinking, What am I doing in here? You know, 'cause you do. You know, you're getting closer syndrome quite a lot. Yeah . And then the musicians came in and I had the producers there and I was ex act on it because it's my label. And I just heard them striking up one of our songs that we'd written and it sounded so good and I just thought that's my song that's my song that I wrote in Nashville at the Blackbird studio and it was incredible I really got overwhelmed because it's taken all this time to realise that should have been a country singer all along. Is it true you're bringing out Jay McDonald's Nashville? You've got your own channel five. . That's right Wow . Because when you listen to the album you've got living the dream, you've got the next chapter. You got don't mind if I do. There is a feistiness there and when you listen to the lyrics, it's about grabbing like can I, say by the testicles? Yes, you can. And I feel like when I see poll to poll on channel one, that's you sort of coming into your own. Do you feel like a kind of confidence now? Yeah, I do. This is a chapter that I 've never felt one, this happy, this confident this sort of show you know you can tell, you can tell in the music and when you're on the telly and everything. It's just a wonderful, wonderful place to be right now when you know life throws ups and downs at us all the time. Yeah. I know . We could we need a brew. We do. And there's only I drink a lot of tea, but when I see you., you You love a brew. I don't trust a coffee drink. No, you don't, do you? I've heard this. I've heard it . But so yeah, I'm at that stage of my life now where it's just great. I'm living at the dream. I'm living the dream. Yes, yeah. Really? Amazing. Yeah. So listen, let's talk about poll to poll. Do you think Channel five are trying to kill you? Yes . I mean, there's just not hing you're mentally. You're mining around these lovely places, then you're kayaking next to these giant seals. You're in sub zero temperatures. Yes . I think they are trying to finish me off. I think you're probably right there you know I'll say go and jump off that cliff. It'll make good talent you know you do that you do that I'm doing a show about bucket list. Oh my told me Orient Express swimming with dolphins. The measurement would be up for a body bag and a parachute . I'm not no I'm fifty. Life's dangerous enough going to the toilet could kill me. Oh bless you. You and Elvis Have you got a burger with you? Oh bless No, just make sure you don't eat at the same time . I'm not a savage. No , no, you're not love area . So on Pole to Pole , you go Arctic and then Antarctic and everything in between . You said you're overwhelmed. Is that the best place you've ever been , do you reckon? Well, it took me a weeks long . So yeah, it has. And you know, we sort of started in Antarctica, which is the south. Yeah, and then went up to the north . But in that time as well, we visited Brazil, went to Rio. Uruguay. I love Uruguay. Absolutely. You think everyone's fit in South America? Yeah. It's like a carry on film and if you're walking around there's people in Speed s I can't go on a sound like that. There's some beautiful people out there and I'm at that age now where I can just look and admire and not at all . I want t toouch. I want to try before you bar. Oh bless you. Oh, I'm over all that. I'm over all that and it's lovely . I just go you know , like you do. Put me knitting down smashing. So you are sort of running out of places to go, aren't you cruise ships? Is there anywhere you haven't been? Well, yeah, there's loads of places really. I made Hawai I haiven'.t done the South Pacific . I haven't done China . So Thailand out there . So there's quite still quite a lot to do. Amazing. So yeah. So listen, we've got to talk about your travel . Now me and you have sort of been on holiday together ish . Yes, we are . We went to Venice together . And it was the weirdest time and I hate it when they do this. We're all we're all in the lounge, I don't wait and then you know when it goes, boarding, you know, like that. Boarding, it just pops up doesn't it? It does . Boarding. Yeah, then red, gate closing. That's right . Oh my god . Well, Jane, I'm running along. I thought, is that you same bolt? You same bolt in wedges and you run in wedges. Where did you learn to run like that in Wakefield. Listen, when y'all gonna miss a plane, you'll get a skill. I'll tell you what, I do were huge these wedges as well. They were honestly. They weren't there? Yeah, and I know you put them on 'cause you don't want to put them in the hold because it' yours where bagss down. That' right. Yes, I know. So the honestly there were like bricks these things yeah. We ran healthful leather and it was a long way. I don't know it was I know I know and there were you and me and then it wasn't dock on the flight. Yes, yeah. Oh , can you imagine that? I know. If that plane went down, can imagine the gay community ? Devastation honestly . Well, let's not say who might get the bigger writer of the bitteries. Let's not . Now don't be a trainer . You got something on your face. When I saw you do that, I thought, he's my mate. He could do that to me. You know what? Everyone asked me, Oh, do you ate Peloma? I love Peloma. I was desperate. What can I do? He's called the traitors. He's not a tipping point all right. You know, we're gonna make another chase. That's true, love that's true. What did you think of Venice? Did you like it? I loved it yeah, you know, and we did sort of the local things, you know, like Harry's Bar and yeah, you know, the square . And I bumped into Gok again there. Oh wait no, yeah. But yeah, it's lovely. Yeah, yeah. It is a beautiful place, but you know, and I think they've stopped the big cruise ships going in now. Yeah, yeah. So that's not because of you . No, it's not to do with me . But it's only the little ones that can come in now, which I think is a lot better. Yeah, because I sat there in Gok's Hotel, he always takes that lovely fancy one. He's at the Dog Palace near there and they're huge these cruise ships and they came through and I thought, Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, and there's never very rarely a time to always say, Oh, that's too big. Yeah . You know, but I add two then too much Yeah quite like you know a posh little one yeah yeah manageable manageable one so you're famously from W akefield . Now listen, you know, I was thinking there's a cost of living crisis here and we often talk about these fabulous places, but let's try and sell Wakefield. Now tell me some bits to go because some people can't holiday abroad . Now is that Yorkshire sculpture park near way? Yes, it is. That's why you laugh who's laughing . I know it is good there . It is. It's amazing. It's beautiful. And the Barbara Heetworth Museum. Correct. The gallery. Yes, correct. Now is that Trinity Walk? Have you shot there? I have. It was only there very, very short. I was doing the HMV sign in. Yes. Oh . Yes, I know and I got me Allan Pot Pies now. Alan Pot Pulp Alum. Alum Alum for Allan Polk Palace. I wasn't looking at my belly when you said that. On Allen's Polk Baltimore, but they do the best meat . Oh, here we go. No it's true. So what's nice about the meat? Do you know it's, seasoned tremendously well and the pastry the pastry is just right and the jelly oh it's good oh the jelly Oh their pork pies are second our to none . So sp can theyonsor this podcast? Hey, they might do now. You never know. Alum palamine. Poke pine. Yeah, the jelly. Oh, it's . I'm Joe Wakefield. Jelly. But we have got some great places. We've got new militar. We've got new military. I can't believe I'm doing this. New Milada. I mean people want a holiday in England and I think no one mentions Wakefield, but there's things to do and things to see. There is, there is. We've got New Miller Dan, which is a beautiful beauty spot where you can walk around and then we've got the Pugnys Lake which is also lovely. Yeah. Have a nice walk around there . We've got all sorts of things in Wakefield. Sandal castle, that's beautiful. Sandal, that's like a ruin though. Yeah, it is. Would suit DIY? Yeah, maybe and Amanda can do it. Yeah, you should do. Alan and Amanda's Sandal Job. Nice. Lovely. It's got a written. It has actually, I don't So where did you holiday as a kid? What was your first holiday memory? Bridlington, Bridlington. We always went to Bridge and that's because that's as far as my dad's vanid geters , you know ? And there was no health and safety. I mean, it was a heavy smoker and we had no top on . I used to sit on the petrol tank. That's true. I used to sit because I youngest and I used to have to sit on the petrol tank and there were no top on it . So, you know, we'd lost the top from somewhere. And my dad will there if I gone , you know, so I mean we all could have just gone up, couldn't we really? But we got up there. My mother had this massive tupperware box and it seems it seemed it's only an hour from Wakefield, but it used to take eight hours. It used to take all day . So, you know, we used to have this pack of sandwiches and we said egg and cheese and onion, which is not great. We had a egg in mayonnaise . And we always ended eating them by the time we got to the end of the road. I know it's not. I don't know how did you ever get there? We're starting. That's it. Yeah, are we there? Can we stop now? . That's true. Because there were no services in that day. No, no, no. You know, so you had to pack up and do it. And there were no motorways either , you know ? No, it's right. It's right. It's what, you know, the dinosaurs tune at the car as you're going along a lovely friendly caveman would point you towards Bridlington. That's right. You know, the one were cobbled. It were cobbled at that time and the Romans were still working on it . So has Jay Macdonald ever had a holiday romance , I've had losad of love . I like I like normally people go I'd rather not talk about I've had that many oh I love it I like them because they're not very long. No that you know when they leave . And yeah but you can leave them and never see them again and I quite liked that. Yes. You know what star sign of you? Aries. Oh, okay. What are you? Gemma now. Two face. I've seen it now . Yeah . Study . Come together on a Windows eleven PC and for a limited time, college students of both worlds. Get the unreal college deal, everything you need to study and play with select Windows eleven PCs. 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Level up your summer at Columbia. com to spend more time outside and less time slathering on aloe Lotion. You're welcome, Columbia, engineered for whatever . So yeah, I didn't have really time because I was too busy with my job all the time. Yeah. So holiday romance were great for me. Yeah, yeah. Have you ever done a gay cruise ? Well, well I do my own cruise now, a Jay McDonald cruise where we hire the ship and you've got a couple you should. Yeah. And it's brilliant. It's absolutely brilliant. We did it last year for the first time and it was utter carnage. I've never seen anything . People were up till like four in the morning and then stayed up for the breakfast. Yeah. It was gay for you So you will invite gays on a boat. Oh, we love . We love it. So we're going again. We're going again this year. We're doing that. Gosh, she can love. Yeah . It's where did you take off from? Tilbury . I know, that's in middle of nowhere. I thought it was Tilbury Dark Tilbury Dock.. Yeah Of course it is, it's a ship. Oh yeah. Don't be smart right off you . So we get there, everybody gets on and it's just fabulous. We have such a good time . With your title track, Living the Dream , you're talking about how you love being on stage and you're very simple like that. You know, you take your shoes and your dress and you're ready to get out there. Is it that simple? Is that that is p iture when you're on stage and not touring ? Oh , don't spoil it. No I know. But it is it is to the public, you know, they they just see you, you know , getting onto a tour bus and then getting to the next place, but they don't see the because you say in this lyrics you're stressed but yeah you are when I get this life Exactly. So when I get stressed I go on tour so I take my shoes and a dress and I go , I get on my bus with my band. And that's probably where I'm most happiest . I'll be honest . And seeing the fans. Yeah. You're doing the paladio? I am Two nights. Wow, wow well, that's an amazing place. Oh , I know it's cheesy, but it's like a hug when you go on . There's not a bad seat in the place. And when you go on that stage , everyone is around you. Amazing. It's lovely, isn't it? Yeah . So we're doing two nights there. And Blackpool, I love Glack Blackpool. You got to do Blackpool. I know, so we're doing opera house there. Belfast, we're going to Belfast. We're that waterfront hall. Yeah. Yeah, yeah . I performed then there was a fire alarm halfway through. No. There's something worse than standing there with your I talk about mistake going out the window when you're there in a car park with the whole audience . Nice. Hello well can over for all. Nice, of course . What are you gonna say in the next bit? Well, wait and see just wait for the fireman to actually leave the venue I think that I bet you had that on purpose so the fine I wasn't getting a laugh. I was like, that fuck that bump . It's like headbutting it that. So listen, tell me somewhere now. We're not gonna name and shame, but has there been anywhere that hasn't sort of lived up to your expectations? This is not a nasty podcast. We're not trying to name and shame. But is there anywhere you've gone that you'd be No, I don't think there is, but I always see the best in where I'm going and I do love adventure. Yeah. So I don't think and of course we've got researchers who go out and find all these amazing places for us . So I just turn up . I usually see the bins first. I mean, I've never seen a glamour, yeah, honest to God, I don't know what this is, but I see the bin. Yeah, I just seem to be near the bins all the time . You know, I go into a theater, I've got to go in the back door, which is by the bins . I go into HMV, I go in by the bins . So it's just not right. My life just smells like a bin . You know, the queen, it smelled like paint because there was always somebody standing for in front of a painting. Mine is the bin. I wouldn't put that on your posters. No, I'm not going to Jay McDonald, live in the palladium. All I can smell is bins. I haven't got a rings in hand, you know what? I'll be right that love . Now really? Are you smelling ? Yeah please. It's true but because you actually say on the show and also on your website as well I am an explorer who thought that this girl from Wakefield would be an explorer but you do. You go all kinds of places. We sort of have the same kind of career. I don't sing like you'd tour all over the world. But you know, with TV, you do have these producers and the like. Alan Ryan, I just want you to jump now into the waterfall. Can you like wrestle that shark? And you like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I mean, and there is some things that go no, no, no, and I have recently. And I don't know if I'm getting fifty or so I'm not Is there anything you've said no to? No , I've done it all. Oh make me look like an arse. Well, yeah I think I know I mean they want me to go garnish it. I'm like no but you never say no I. jumped off the sky tower in New Zealand in Auckland. Well, I well, I've talked about this on here. I'm so glad because I turn up there and you bungee jump off and I'm there unpacking my case. I can see people screaming whisping past the window. Yeah . I'm like out here in this hotel people are lying. I can't tell you I know honesty goodness. So we were at the bottom with Mark Powell, who was my executive producer on the show and they were just waiting for it and were there a cloud that went past so we couldn't do it now. And then all of a sudden it cleared and all you could do with this . Yes . And he's like, I'm thinking, oh gosh. And then all of a sudden you see this and it was literally me just coming down this thing. But it was nerve wracking. Yeah. And I got to the bottom and I thought, what am I doing with my life? Yeah . Then I went swimming with alligators. Is that one of the things I turned down on . I didn't turn it down. I went up there. I was all Billy bit big bolt. Yeah, but yeah, yeah, but you don't mean and it's the tipping forward. I couldn't do it and you could do it. Mal, I had no choice they just don't clip me off it . Was you wearing those massive wedges? No, not I'm surprised you'd go downfoot first. Well, I could have done, yeah. You probably landed on your feet. That's true. Well, I've got my big feet. I've got big feet. Howbits your face? I've got size eights. Oh , they're big are they? Hobbits. I know actually they're not airy are they? Well actually, yeah, now we come to watching it. Yeah, oh, you see, foot fetishers everywhere. Did you get them? Did you get them? Well, I think so because there's quite a lot of funny Did you get fan mail sink and you send it your feet? No because I just size eight. No, I don't do any of that, so it's a good man he has in mine off. Do you? Yeah, crock. No, very nice. Wanna old wedges? Nice. That'll be good, won't it? What are you lying? Do you know he is a traitor in ? Oh, you stopping now. You could do well in life. You murdered twelve national treasures and every snow can trust you. I love it . I love it. What do you like for experimenting with food and everything ? Will you go street food? Do you like that? Yeah, I'll have a go at it. I don't enjoy all of it and I have a go. Yeah. I did this this local one and it said, Oh purple prawns, purple prawns. Purple prom, everybody gone about these purple prawns and I thought purple prawns, that's try some . I mean, I should say purple prawns. And then they were going, What do you think? And I went these smash in my head, I'm going, They just taste like pink ones . But the only difference was the price . You know, and the weight feel out of me there, I thought, well, that's just a bit of a risk. Trinity wall. No, you wouldn't love now. And you wouldn't be able to buy them. No because they're too expensive. Yeah, but they did taste and you know, if you go into that place in the world , which I can't remember what it was. Have you ever gone ro gue though? Ever liked chicken, feet, bowls, testicles ? Yeah , I've done all that, but I did that on the ship. Unfest. Yeah . I did fit Look, nothing like, it's just like Yeah, I've tried quite a few things. That's a bit crunchy. And do you believe in Star Supreme Yeah, I do actually. Yeah. Yeah, I have a go. So written. Yeah I have a go . I don't say I like it all. No at least you try it. I do try it yeah. Yeah . Now listen, you know you always sing a song at the end . Have you add any feedback from anyone and you get like oh my god love it. Thanks for doing that No you must when we started to do things like cake by the ocean and APT and stuff like that , everybody's now got into this . What on earth is she gonna sing next, you know? So and that's Matt Powell again, he'll just say what do you think to this? And we, you know, we all sit down and say that and ask I can't do that. What are you making me sing that far? But they go viral. Yeah, I love them. I know it's not right, is it? But it's lovely. It's lovely 'cause that's my stick really at the end because not many people sing at the end of the show. No, no . And whether you love it or hate it , it's staying. Oh good. Good. Now, I think people doing it like it used to do like Cyla and Bruce . No, that used to sing at the end. Yeah, well that were all Ben Frau becauseit Ben Fruit Channel five came up with the whole idea of me cruising and doing the thing and he said I want you to sing at the end and my face said well, oh please don't no . And he went honestly I think this will work. So I mean hats off to him. It does. Hats off to him for bringing that. Where was she singing Mambo Italiano? Oh, in Portofino? Yeah. What a fabulous night. I know. Night. You didn't give a shit. You were n't around those table . I loved it. Mirror up in a bowl. Yeah . I loved it . I loved it . Yeah, it's good fun, no it's good. Yeah. That's why people love it. The people just want fun now. Yeah, they're so much depressing things around it . Yeah, yeah. So we just have a laugh. Yeah. And that's it. Really? Yeah, yeah. So tell us with these cruise ships . Because what? Sell it to me because I don't fancy Krus . I want to go on this gay one because I can't see a bit of a round. So we have a lot of gay people on it, but every walk of life goes on it. You know, there's no children on it , but it's great and you don't have to be in the fan club, you don't have to you can just book it. Yeah, come on. Obviously if you don't like me, don't come on it because I'm there a lot . So love that . But it's just a great we have a good time on there. So tell me a cruise ship for people who don't like cruises safe. Right. Always go to a travel agent if you want to go on a cruise and tell them what you want there is a cruise for everyone. There's the really quiet cruisers, the discovery cruisers, which is what Polster Pole was on. Yeah, yeah, where it's all like minded people wanting to go to that place and experience it, get off the ship and go and get around that table and they were saying they love the Ethos of it and you got to wash the boots before you go out there with no contamination that's right. You see . So there's all that or there's the party cruisers where everybody's up dancing and raving off the reds , which is great unless you're in the suite underneath Oh no I have been ever come out in your night and your meals keep me down? No. I said can you imagine me doing that? Excuse me? Excuse me. Kelly, Kate Dan? I've got two performances tomorrow. Amber and Tongues . But you can really pick the right ship for you. So there is a ship for everyone. There's a ship for me. Yeah, there is love, yeah. Oh , yeah, so it depends what you want. ship faced. Yay . Hey . Right. We are about to land, so we've got time now for quick fire round, okay? Isle or window ? Window? Beat your pool. Beach. Full moon party or full English breakfast Full English Mile high or I'm too shy. I'm too shy bullshit. Wedge or travel shoe? Oh well used to be wedged now a travel shoe . Holiday romance overrated or underrated No, I think they're alright. I think over rated I can't speak underrated, underrated. Or whis late? Oh, first at departure gate. Oh, first at departure gate. I know I saw you whisking along that and then last but not least, tip 'em or fuck him. Oh, tip 'em? Tip them oh. Absolutely. That Jane knew you would love. Yes. I've heard in Trinity Walk, you're a very good tipper. Especially with those Alums pulp pies. Oh, Alums pies. You can't beat something off. All right. Now come on, you're not gonna get you probably will get free shit now, wouldn't you? You get free pork pie if you mention it. No, but I must have mentioned it in one of the interviews when I was at HMV the other week. And the sent two round. Oh , and I could smell them. They'd just come out the oven. Oh, they were so we could get free alum ballets from here . No, you can't. No, I mean HMV in wakefield. Okay , no , so they sent them to loose women wants. I don't think I'm ready for his journey. Oh, hello. I'm finishing all the soul. Very nice. Come on . Come on, sing it, baby. Show's over guys. Thank you so much, Jane. I love you. Love you, Buck. Thank you. It's great to see you. Thank you . We hope you enjoyed your flight. Don't forget to like and subscribe. Don't ever forget Live's up

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