A Heartfelt Surprise from Helen

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Requires Google account, Google Health App Internet and Google Health Premium Subscription. Feature sub fejectat toures change, availability and results vary, not intended for medical purposes, works independently of Gemini apps, check responses for accuracy . Study . Come together on a Windows eleven PC. And for a limited time, college students get of both worlds. Get the unreal college deal, everything you need to study and play with select Windows eleven PCs. Eligible students get a year of Microsoft three hundred and sixty five premium and a year of X box GamePass ultimate with a custom color Xbox wireless controller. Learn more at Windows. com slash student offer. Law supplies last and ends june thirtieth terms at aka dot mslash college pc. When I got famous, I was like , Oh, I hate this. I hate this so much. Like the sort of British attitude of just like wow, prove yourself for the rest of your life, even though we do love that song, but you and you're just like, okay. Foundation . I don't think people understand how brave you have to be to be one hundred percent honest and Kate Nash, you are what we are missing in the entertainment industry when I was young , I wanted to be good. I love doing my books and my homework, but also I want to be a musician, I want to be an actor. You had an experience when you were younger that just blew my mind. My mum felt my chest and my heart was going and we went straight to hospital and I basically found out I had this heart condition and I was working in Nando's and took time off Nando's to have heart surgery. I had this moment of I don't want to go back to Nando 's. I want to live. I just went for it, but then I was in the gutter. Everything that I went through in my career, getting dropped, getting stolen from, being eighteen in the daily mail, like deciding, this is who you are. How did that happen? In the music industry, we are treated like fools. The contracts that we sign, you sign them at seventeen, it's fine, you'll be in it until you're sixty seven. They'll own eighty percent of everything , but you know, it's the way. But there's dreams I have, things I want to achieve , I would sabotage them all to get veterans . They'll really have to come and meet us at the line and we decide where the line is. You know, my bomb in the government . We've got something for you. I can't I'm in shock . I mean, I was really looking forward to this today because you are I feel like you are what we are missing in the entertainment industry in the broader sense because you're not just a musician, it's not just in music, it's like music and acting . You are a maverick . And you are truly yourself and I don't think that people really understand how difficult that is and how brave you have to be to be a hundred percent honest and that's what you are and I love it . Yeah . I think it's like it would be so hard for me not to be myself and I think that's what I have actually wrestled with. Because I think you're right, there are consequences to being a hundred percent this is who I am, this is what I can do. This is what I can't do, or this is what I don't want to do . And I've my career has been very like this because of that , but like for me personally , it would have been harder to do the other thing. Yes. Because really what I learned when I got famous, I suppose, you know, when I was young, I was like, I want to be a musician, I want to be an actor, I want to be famous, I want to do this, I want to do that. And then you kind of get fame . And I was like, Oh, I hate this. I hate this so much. These are I could sort of just go into these rooms and I'd self destruct. I mean, I remember going to the Glamour awards in two thousand eight, I think and I set all the fire alarms off in the building because I just was like, Hey, I hate this whole it just all seemed so phony and I can't be in those environments where you can't be phony. Yeah, I can't be phony. You can't be phony. I mean, there's something, but you know what? There's something very relaxing about being around some one who is honest . There's no time. Yes, there is it, it is because there is nowhere to go with the truth . I think the truth , yeah, it's important to me as an artist as well to try that sort of my code of conduct is how can I be truthful about who I am right now in my music, in my work . And that changes, doesn't it? Because we're always changing, you're like constantly evolving . And so yeah, even like my interpretation of what that means will change . I mean that',s another thing I hate is when people look back at old interviews and they go, Well, you said this. And I was like , that was ten years ago. I mean like a different bird. We have to be allowed to, we have to change . And isn't that, oh my god so relevant to today . I feel it's so important to be allowed to be a mess and like make mistakes and I feel you really get that. I get it what are we saying to young people that the perception of you is more important than the real , I think that's actually what we are saying. The perception of you is more important than the real you. So just to make sure you come across as perfect. Otherwise, extreme consequences and I just don't see how that is a human experience. Like it's not human , is it ? I was just wondering would it be alright if you just subscribed Thanks . Hang on. I want before I go into all of this getting in so quickly this is I just quickly want to ask you at the beginning of this podcast , just in case anybody turns off halfway through that, I want to ask you what you are doing right now in your life. So you've got new music coming out. Yes, I do have new music coming out. It's a cover of Shinad O'Connor's famine. Talk to me about Shinade Connor. Incredibly important artist, for me, but for everybody . Shane , you know, she became she says that she was, you know , she accidentally had this pop hit and was seen as this pop singer. Actually she was always a protest singer . And famine , I'm half Irish, so my mum's from Dublin. And I don't know if it's an age thing, but just the connection to root and where you're from, I think, becomes more and more important as you get older because you're just trying to understand who you are, why you've made certain decisions and what maybe impacted those decisions and looking back and thinking, Oh, why did I feel that? Or why did I do that? And maybe I, you know, you're just trying to understand and you're thinking about losing your parents and life becomes more serious. And so I think like going back to figure out who I am and where I'm from is more important than it's ever been. I've always been really interested in it. And I grew up like every summer in Ireland and had this idea to sort of explore that in my music work a long time ago, but it wasn't only until the last couple of years was I able to really work on this music . And I wanted to start with this cover of Shenado Connor's famine because it's such an insanely incredible song . Like she just gives you a history lesson and when I heard it I was like how come I don't know this how come I wasn't, you know taught this at school but also at home with dual nationality I don't know England's history , apart from like the version that we're shown, which is so different how other countries in the world see us because we had an empire . And we just have such a bloody history . And I think with the rise in nationalism and what we're sort of seeing in the world today, it's really important for me to dive into that. And Shenade says, if there is ever going to be healing, there has to be a remembering and grieving so that there can be forgiving, there has to be knowledge and understanding. I love that and I sort of want to honor that chorus there that like actually the more people that cover that song , the better because you can sort of educate people and I'm really interested in the relationship between England and Ireland and what we're seeing in England with all these flags going up everywhere and what that means and why people are feeling the way they feel and sort of say, well, you know, we don't know our history , including me. I don't want to just point the finger . I'm in it as well of saying like I want to learn more and may perhaps like learning could be healing instead of like being reactive and angry and what's so nice is that I feel like we've watched you evolve . We've watched you grow up. Yeah, yeah. And that's an incredible journey to see you go from I know young age, teenager to now . And And how you are coming from a place of love and understanding now through going through your journey, you have to go through the journey to get that. You do. You have to crawl through the sewage to be able to get out the tunnel, don't you? You can't like jump out of it. I've always liked that metaphor of the Shawshank Redemption when they're like at the end of the movie like crawling, he's crawling through all the shit . And I've always thought at times when I harden like you can't escape the tunnel if you don't crawl through the shit, that you just can't click yourself out of it. And actually if you don't crawl through the shit, then you won't get out of the tunnel . So you have to do it . And there are so many metaphors in that movie. Also the little scratches on the wall that he makes the tunnel with I always think in terms of my politics, my beliefs, feminism, activism, I just want to be one of the little scratches But that's really a lot. You know, if we all are one little scratch, that makes tunnels. So like I think sort of saying I care about everything and I want to ch ange everything. It's like we can't change everything . We can't take on the whole entire world. But what can you do in your little space? Like be a little scratch? And I think as a musician, obviously, like, there is quite a lot I can do , really , but I want to be trying to do less now and really being specific about what I'm saying . Like I don't repost loads of stuff on Instagram anymore. I don't sort of shout about everything. I wait and I go, well, what do I think about this? And let me do something really informed and only speak when I feel I really know what I'm talking about and I feel this is worth me like diving in which is kind of what I did with my single germ last summer because as a feminist and also you know having so many LGBTQ IA plus fans and trans people in my life, this issue was like untouchable and don't get involved in this. It's so hot and so scary and there's so many there's so much viteral online and I just thought I just can't I can't care about comments for my like who cares ? We all know anyway seventy percent of it is just bots and I know exactly exactly all our lives . You kind of have to like transcend comments and accept everyone's gonna sling mad at you and then just say what you think because all of that stuff just doesn't really matter. I don't know what's interesting because I'm twenty years older than you . And when I look back at my life growing up when I was seventeen, eighteen , every club that I went to was so unbelievably inclusive. Like we had everyone there , trans straight, gay , like everyone. Yeah, and no one gave you shit. Yeah. I don't know people get shit in real life. But I it's because we hear on line from these two ends of the spectrum, we think that it's all like that end or that end. Yes. But it's not the vast majority of people . Most people will get on. We shove them in a room. Yeah , you know, and like put on some good music or just give them some food to eat. Music is the key. It really is the connective bringing . It really does bring people together. And I think that people become radicaliz ed and isolated . And then they get attacked. And I've had the experience as well. I've had that experience of being attacked on Twitter and it is this kind of the first time it happens, you're like, whoa, that's the it almost feels physical. It's not, but you just feel like you've been in a fight and you think, Oh my god, like, I actually get why people double down , find safety. Who's got my back and then end up down some pathway of like just being yeah, it's okay. Like actually, did you know this? And sort of following falling into these like I just think get off your phone, just get off your phone . And I mean, is that not something that you've learned with time. Yes. And as a young person growing up through all of that, I've just realized the less I'm on my phone, the better. Yeah . You want to do good. I do want to do good. And I don't very good . So I want to be good. I don't want to like to I'd like to talk to you about because Catholicism really does imprint itself on someone's psyche if they are and, you weren't even really religious religious. When I was young, I was, I mean, when I was young, I was bored in mass, like a little kid . And then when I became a teenager, sort of twelve, thirteen , fourteen , and then fifteen, sixteen changed. But twelve, thirteen, fourteen, I was I was, I'm Catholic . I really wanted to do my confirmation. I loved it. I loved concerned. Doing my books and my homework and kind of getting out of it and go . Like I really liked it. I was quite like a club. Yeah. And then I went to school and I'd see like anti abortion videos and I was like, abortion is wrong. It really is wrong, you know? Like I took on all these like I'm like, oh, masturbating, you're going to go tell that. I'm like, Oh , I want to unpick that a bit. Really better pray because that is a really sad to so much religion full stop. Yes, I mean is the pleasure . No pleasure. No pleasure. But in particular in particular for women and of course like what we're not supposed to have pleasure. I think it's because we could just control the world if we wanted to. You know, we could all just be like, right, we're going on birth strike. It's over. We're going to the human race is done guys. Because of us . My mum, if she wanted something to get done, she used to like withdraw sex . Yeah. I'm on a car. Withdraw sex there is it worked. What it is? It's called Lysistrata where they wanted the men to stop going to war and they all stopped having sex and the men stopped going to war. Is that what it is? I just don't know why it's such a threat, our reproductive system and our sexuality , but it's always been the way of the witch trials. It was always like , you know, it comes from it was midwives, weren't they? They were some of the first people called witches were midwives. I've always been connected . Can I just tell you something? Well, I don't even know how long we've been sat here. I don't know where we're talking about. You've literally blown my mind like ten times , midwives. Yes, being the first people , I'd never really thought about that. Yeah. Can I just say I'm learning a lot today? I'm really enjoying it. Thank you so much. Oh God, honestly, 'cause that is true. It's a threat I mean, I try to understand it because sometimes I think, well, why does everyone hate women so much? Why do they want to kill them and take away their right to vote or like in short and like for now, like take away right to abortion and they're trying to do this like one vote per household thing in America and it's but why? You know, I don't I think fear has got to be surely fear . It's got to be fear based because of our cyc les, you know , it's really interesting because lots of, you know, I know women like trying to get pregnant and there's problems with sperm. And men's sperm, like their DNA in the sperm gets fragmented as they age , but because they can sort of just spunk forever, everyone's like, oh, they can have babies till they're eighty, but that's actually not true. And obviously women have we have different bodies and different situations, but like it's always on us. The focus is always on us and become like , you know, just the patriarch has done a lot of damage. This is when you said I informed myself. Yeah, yeah, I'm trying to do that because I think it's I don't know how else to function in today's I can't watch another random person on TikTok explain something to me and me think, well, who are they? And do they have any knowledge about this or I feel like I've come off TikTok because I didn't really understand it but now I feel like I should go on because I want to put love on there. I mean, you should be on TikTok. I need to put love . You should not scroll on it or watch anything. No , you should explain TikTok. Love on. That's all I'm going to do. You're sharing, you've done so much for women, a conversation about menopause . Why the it didn't exist before you? Nobody like it has we ever heard about it being talked about . That's why it didn't. What the hell but that's, you know, like these things it's so crazy like you know, we're so unprepared for our experience, but we're so blamed and responsible . And yeah, like growing up in a Catholic school , I had a teacher who told me and some girls, Oh, I can't really tell you this, but if you do have sex I use a condom because we weren't allowed to use condoms because we're Catholic. Oh , which is why so many religious kids get married really young. So she did you a complete service. Yes. She's like, please don't get pregnant, you know, your teenagers because she knew that teenagers want to have that so good. Yeah. But it was like if someone had found that out, she probably would have got fired . Because we were being told in religious studies you'll go to hell for masturbating to circle back. Did you? Did I masturbate Every night I masturbated from quite young , and I like I was like did you did you good ? But did you feel like you listen ing to something wrong ? I think I did it's hard to it's hard to didn't stop me. No. But I would pray a lot and I really think, I I just loved praying and if I masturbating and in my bed I'd be praying or masturbating and that was kind of maybe I'd be praying after I masturbated because I feel like I didn't think I really even knew what it was it's that idea of us getting pleasure from something being a sin release in like stress release stress release. It's such a fucked up you can't do the thing. Guys can , but you can't. So you went to Catholic school and I'm seeing the like who you were very, very good . Yes, I was very good. I was good and I wanted to be good. And then I wouldn't say I got like I was like, I'm bad or anything, but I started sort of wanting to socialize and drink and liked boys and I'm like I remember once a girl in my class talking about kissing another girl and she said Oh be so disgusting to kiss another girl and I was like oh yeah, that would be gusting and I'm thinking that might good actually . Kind of hang on a minute. Think about that later tonight after a good pride, you know , weird . But really for me, I started I think like I wanted to go clubbing. My sister would go to garage clubs. So let's talk about your sister . You're the middle child. I'm the difficult middle child. Where so I mean I want to just check in with you about that because I've got three kids. Okay and yes like society it's a bit like the general gen Z et cetera et cetera tells us that the middle child is the difficult one. Did you did you? But are you? No, I don't know. I mean I'm thinking about what my sisters are going to say watching that. I think we were we were all pretty difficult. I think in our own unique way. I think everybody Everybody thinks that they've got a problem with their position in the family. Everyone else thinks it's difficult for me because I had to do everything first and then everybody else . the And rules are stronger for them, right? Yeah. And then by the time the baby younger they can go the other one goes my eldest two hate me because they think I'm spoiled. Yeah . Well, I think, you know , I'm not sure. I just think we were very like physical with each other. used We to beat each other up a lot. Did you? Yeah . God, yeah. It was practice for Globe. When I got the Glow Audition, I thought I can do this. I could fought my sisters for years in the streets . We actually got told off rebanding once that my mum was so ashamed because me and my older sister had a physical brawl in the street on the way to school at seven thirty in the morning. I don't know what had happened and I ripped her shirt and she was like punching me in the head and I was like and our neighbour saw and she had to go home and change because I literally tore her shirt in half . And my mum found out and we were in so much trouble like Irish mother , like ashamed. Ashamed, it was so shame. But we did beat each other up quite a lot and it was always two against one. It's safe , that's safe fighting because you love each other . Yeah, well, it's that weird dynamic with sisters. Well, maybe it's siblings in general , but we would be locking each other in the shed for two hours, throwing shampoo on each other, like in the living room like and then being like, Oh my God, mom's coming home and found me fixed this and punching each other and all this. And then you'd be, oh sure what she Simpsons and you just sit there and it's just normal. And even now we can have arguments and we can have serious arguments but then you can just turn things around with siblings very quickly . For me anyway, I'm very close with my sisters And I know they have my back. Yeah, one hundred percent it keeps coming into my head safe. Yeah, they will always be there for me and always do what they can for me and same with me even, if I'm being punched in the head by one of them like if someone else tried to punch me in the head they would kill them. Yeah, we would be like, We're together. You can't join, you know . So we do have each other's spesc. But yeah, I don't I struggled with tantrums a lot and I'm in redhead. I think I was quite fiery. I was very stubborn which I got from my mother yeah I think we all were difficult in our own special way . And it's hard. It's hard growing up being a teenager and everyone's trying to do their best . My poor dad had so many like women in the house. Yeah, and he would just kind of sit there like he's quite quiet my dad . And we'd always be really surprised when we'd see my dad at a party or something. So he'd be really chatting everyone. Why does he travel like this at home? And everyone's like because you don't let him get a word in edgeways My baddies rumbling. I might actually have to have that banana bread. Yeah. And some of it. Yeah, yeah. And we put it in the napkin. Yes. And then that makes amazing. You gotta take care of yourself, that's self love. How you get banana bread when your belly's rumbling? Not a joke . That is important. Yeah . Your sleep score is low. Are you getting enough ? Ah, dried magnesium. You might remember when Dr. Rangan Chas i was on this show and he said Knowledge isn't enough. I mean, there's more information and data available to us than ever before and somehow we've ended up actually checking an app to find out if we're tired. I know when I'm tired. Knowing isn't the same as knowing what to do. 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You had an experience when you were younger that just blew my mind because I had this brain surgery in november twenty four. It has changed . Everything's different . But you had that , I feel like at seventeen. Yeah , with your heart issue, but how did it happen? So can you just explain to everybody how you discovered something was up with your heart? Spat my coffee out . Do you have it? I'm triggered. I'm triggered. I'm like , She told about the heart . Oh God and that that's put out because I think were you old enough to understand? This is Did it have an impact ? I think yes and no . I think it did have an impact . I think going through what you like going through at your age so consciously yes is so much harder because I really remember feeling quite dumbfounded by it . So how did you discover it? So I used to get heart palpitations a lot probably when I was started when I was like a teenager . And I would say that, but also I'm asthmatic. So I take ventilin and my mum is very she's a nurse, so she was a nurse. She would hide now. She's a hospice nurse. She worked at a hospice. Yeah. She's amazing. Oh my God, amazing, amazing. Yeah . And that I think also is part of the impact on this. So ostate ventiline which does cause p alpitations. So when I said my heart's beating fast, my mum would say, well, you take ventilin so probably having palpitations from that. Don't worry. But then a girl at our school had seven heart attacks. And how old were you at this point ? seventeen? sixteen. Yeah, I was sixteen, I think. And she survived incredible crazy story. I had a heart transplant. It shocked our whole community. It was like family friends sort of I'll never forget that that day . But then when I said I've got palpitations after that , my mum just took a different approach because this really serious thing had happened and she felt my chest and my heart was going and she went what the and we went straight to hospital and I started getting ECGs and basically found out I this had heart condition . And I was at the Brit school at this point. And I was I suppose I was applying for universities or thinking about doing that. It's a little bit of a blurry timeline . But the doctor sat me down and told me these percentages of survival , what problems I could have when I'm older, pacemaker, stroke, heart attack, what the surgery included. And I was just sat there and I was thinking, I don't even know where I want to go to Uni . Like I'm finding that quite overwhelming. Like in three years it's a really big commitment . You know, so then choosing life or death , it just felt too big, I think and I think I numbed out because I just thought, well, what am I going to have for dinner? I don't really know. You know, you can't.es Y. What am I doing this Friday? Everything's kind of a big decision and a big commitment when you're young. Yes . And so trying to decide because I sort of had to take on this decision of the risk of the surgery, the risk of not doing the surgery and I just didn't know what to do. And your mum was with you. Yeah, my mum was helping helping you navigate. She was really angry with the doctor for putting these kind of stats on me and we were trying to figure out together , but what happened is I had this episode at school where I was told if you get chest pain go to hospital. If you have palpitations and you get chest pain go to hospital. And I had palpitations and I got chest pain . And I was so scared that I just went and sat in a room at school . And I was thinking, Is this really happening? Am I making this up? Am I making a big deal out? Am I being difficult? Yeah, what do I do? I'm just gonna hide in this room . And I think the deputy had found me in the room crying and she was amazing. She took me to hospital . I went to like Croydon on a Friday night and A A it was awful . This guy covered in blood in some like drunken spat next to me and he was like, do you come here often? And I was like, No . And I'm hooked up to all this stuff. And essentially, it got so bad that I didn't have to make the decision. I had to have the procedure. Yeah. Yeah. And by the time that happened, I had gotten rejected from all unis and I was working in Nando's and I took time off Nando's to have heart surgery . I mean so I remember like , yeah being having a heart surgery and it was so scary because they had to laser off part of my heart and what did you think when you went in and they put the anesthetic into your arm ? Did you go to sleep thinking? I didn go't to sleep. Are they had to keep me awake? They kept you awake yes, of course. So it was weird because I was on drugs. During the operation, you were awake. And but I felt, you know what's so sad as I was this teenage girl and I was like, everyone see me naked and I was so embarrassed . And I was sort of more embarrassed about being seen naked than maybe dying or having a pacemaker or something. You know, God isn't that interesting . And then I could feel the tubes because they had to keep me waiting for it. Go up your veins. Absolutely veins three holes here, two holes there and then these tubes like you can feel them going up and it hurts . And then you're on fire in your chest . And it was quite cool, I guess, to experience that. I thought, this is very intense, but quite a cool to know what this feels like . And then I was in like recovery in hospital. My sister younger sister came in and I had to have a catheter because I realized after it, you can't go to the toilet. You can't stand up because you would bleed out. Right. So they tried . I was like, Oh God. So then I tried to try a bedpan and I was just too nervous then. I couldn't use a bedpan. So they had to do a catheter and then I had like a bag of pea and my sister's like taking photos of it with her digital camera and like making fun of me and being like, I'm going to put this on my space . My space is Yeah my, space is a thing but I had some alone time in there and I remember like you just don't get cleaned up here so I had all the blood everywhere and I just lay in the bed by myself and I think I had this moment of thinking I don't want to go back to Nando's . And so I quit Nando's to sort of recover from this thing, but then I needed another job. I ended up working at River Island . But when I went back to River Island, I was like, I have to do something My friends are going to Union, my friends are travelling, my friends are doing life. And I'm working in River Island at the Harlequin Centre in Watford, and I'm just not doing anything and I really want to be creative and I booked my first gig. I had this time at home and I'm going to make these demos and I they get you a guitar ? Yes. So I b'rodke my foot and I was like depressed and I think I'd had the heart and then the foot my mum and dad bought me my first guitar and I had my laptop and I was making these little demos and I made this deal with myself once my foot is heal ed, I'm going to go live with my MySpace page. I'm going to upload all these demos to my space. And I'm going to go to Trinity and Hurry, which was like the local bar that had nights, music nights, and booking. Yeah, great. And before that, I would have been so scared to do it. These two events in your life gave you the courage. What could have been as consciously connected? No, but what could have been seen as disasters that could have made you think, Oh, poor me. Yeah . You never went victim. But yeah, I do think it's looking back on it without me consciously connecting it at the tongue because when you're young, I don't think you can. I think well,, that's obviously why I was so adamant. I'm not going to have a backup plan. I'm not going to like, you know, secure myself another way. I need to do something now. I need to do it now. I need to have an interesting life, you know . But I think this is what near death experiences give you . I want to live. I want to live exactly and I don't just want to live normally, I want to really live. Yeah. And it's this immediate feeling. And it gave me the courage because I was so scared at the thought of doing a show. I didn't know what I was doing at all . And I made a flyer and I it's actually twenty years on april thirteenth to the day of my first gig, april thirteenth, two thousand six was my first gig at Trinity . And I went live with my MySpace. It's funny as an adult, I think if it happened to me now , it would be even more stressful because you know about risk and you know your consequences you've lost people. Other people I know have died. And there's an awareness and like you're saying, you really know life isn't going to last forever. It just gets a bit more serious, doesn't it? And I think when you're young , that sort of numb numbness came in, but then action . And I've got to live, I've got to do it, and I want to do fun things. I want to do, I want to have an interesting life. And I've worked hard at school and like I want to be creative and I just went for it, but I got paid thirty pounds of the gig which I didn't know I was getting. And once that thirty pounds went in my hand , poo , I was, Oh my God, you can actually you can get money for doing this . And I woke up the next day in a quit River Island. I called them and I said I've made some steps in the right direction towards the career I really want . I've played a bar in my hometown and I got paid thirty pounds okay and I was like, I can't come back to work . And then my boss said, Can you return the fob? And I said, No, I can't sorry, I can't, I can't. I'm done. I'm done. I can't come back. I'm just too busy now trying to book gigs all over London . And I just really went for it. Okay guys , I need you in my beginning again gang. Listen , it's the most funnest, most awesome club in the whole world and I want you to be part of it. So when you sign up to our newsletter , you get all the bits that I don't share anywhere else . Things that I'm loving, what I'm reading, my favourite outfits , some of the most gorge ous begin again stories that you've sent in. I actually really love reading those. It's one of my favorite parts of the week. And the really fun bit is I will also share some begin again secrets, like what guests we've got coming up and you'll know before anyone else does don't tell everyone so come and join the best gang ever, the link's right below and it just takes five seconds and it's free . If you've ever blasted Synth Beats from your boombox or burn CDs for your besties , this one's for you. As people get older, much like their music tastes, their health needs change. Ag one is the simple daily health drink designed to deliver over seventy five essential daily nutrients in pre and probiotics to support energy, digestion, and mood. So you can make the most out of every decade and dance break. Learn more at drinkag one. com . This episode is brought to you by State Farm. You know those friends who support your preference for podcasts over music on road trips , that's the energy state farm brings to insurance. With over nineteen thousand local agents, they help you find the coverage that fits your needs, so you can spend less time worrying about insurance and more time enjoying the ride. Download the State Farm app or go online at statefarm dot com Like a good neighbor. State Farm is there . Tomorrow morning is knocking. Stock your fridge now. How about a creamy moca frappuccino drink, or a sweet vanilla, smooth caramel maybe, or white chocolate molcha. Whichever you choose, delicious coffee awaits. Find Starbucks Fappuccino drinks wherever you buy your groceries. Can you look back now and see what a brave young woman you were. Can you appreciate yeah how brilliant I'm brave that was. Yes, and I'm really okay with my younger self now because I had to do a lot of work . Be whencause you are famous from eighteen and you have a number one record at eighteen made of bricks , and then for the rest of my life, that's what I'm mostly known for. You know, I haven't had my other music isn't as commercially successful , which has been my intention, you know, not to chase commercial success. Yeah, you're just true to yourself. Yeah. Yeah, it's not about that. It's not about that for me, but other people will project onto me what that means as failure and interesting and sort of see me as an eighteen year old like forever . You have to do a lot of work to be okay with that . And I've done that work . And it's really my tenure anniversary of Made of Bricks was so healing for me. After everything that I went through in my career, getting dropped, getting stolen from and feeling like such an idiot , and all the trauma of that stuff I was saying, like being eighteen in the Daily Mail, like deciding this is who you are, you're a fake, you're not in the accident . I was twenty five. Yeah , but at eighteen, I don't know how you coped. It was it was yeah, and it was really cool . All that stuff, right? Tell me some of the things that the papers used to say about you because I bet you remember Fat Ugly I mean just, that eighteen year old fat, ugly . And I took actually more personal, I felt like my peers who were men that were young that had debut albums that were extremely successful were geniuses and legends. And I was like a silly little teenage girl and writing in a diary is stupid and that has been so reclaimed now which I absolutely love. I mean, I used to write a diary, you used to write a diary and I interviewed an amazing kind of big thinker in the business world Rob,in Shalmer, that he's written that book up there. Okay, five AM Club. And he journals every day, he wakes up at five and he journals and he writes and there you were being ridiculed for it . And but meanwhile, everyone's doing it now. You were the OG But it was OG But it was also like a huge success and people kids loved young girls loved it and connected with it and so it wasn't something silly . And what I realized, I think , I was lucky to realize that if you're calling me these things and I look out and I see loads of girls that are getting my haircut and like look like me or you're calling all of them those things as well. And I realized that really early and I think that empowered me and made me be able to handle it to be like I'm going to be okay for them because these that are attacking all of us like I'm actually not alone in this because if they read that they',re going to think oh well I'm not okay either. And I'd also gone through a manager stealing money from me. Yes . Can I just talk about? Sorry to get into it. Yeah , that was a big thing because you know, you were quite he was your manager from quite young. And you trusted him. Yeah. And I mean, it's like a breakup with well, it's like a breakup. I did a love. I did trust him too. You know, you're like , what? It's the start of betrayal. Betrayal start to betrayal and you feel so stupid. If someone steals it, you feel such a fool . And you should really idiot. I mean, I hate the word shouldn't, but that's sad that you've felt that like but yeah you were wronged . Yes, but it's good that it's good to me that it happened now it is because in the music industry , we are treated like fools that shouldn't really understand the contracts that we sign. You sign them at seventeen, it's fine. You'll be in it 'til you're sixty seven. It doesn't really matter. They'll own eighty percent of everything you want, but you know it's the way. And you're like, okay that's the universal contract that I'm still in now . And we're used as bartering chips and we're very like solo off and like, you know, don't tell people this and it doesn't matter, you know, just drink this, take this line, blah, blah, blah. But yeah, I really I learned to be okay with my young self on the ten year anniversary tour because I'd felt like after getting stolen from I'm not worth anything in this industry. I am stupid . I've failed . I need to toughen up. I need to know business. You know, I need to be a hard knife. Like if I'm gonna do this, I need to be, you know, like boss bitch girl boss. Like, we got to be everything . And I just couldn't really do it. I just it wasn't really me. And the interesting thing was going on the Made of Bricks Tour , and I suddenly was met with all of these people who grew up, you know, with the music and they were there . And everyone sang every single word. I felt like their hearts were like pounding out of their chest . There was friends, you know, people had come to celebrate this thing from there from ten years ago . And there was a group of girls who wrote to me . They were in Manchester and they said our friend at school, we always grew up listening to you. You were everything to her. Like she was Mariella and she didn't she lost her battle with mental health and we're here for her tonight. We really want you to read this letter . And I got the message. And then when I was playing, I looked up on the balcony and I saw these girls arm in arm. I knew it was them. I could just tell the way they worked together . And I thought, this is why I'm not a hardener, you know? I mean, I am a bit of a hardener, but not in terms of music. Like I'm not going to hard , I'm not going to become bitter . I don't have to be able to do it all. And if I close that off actually, and if I close off my vulnerability my willingness to be open, to bring people in , which is my nature, I'll lose all of this. This is why I have this and this is valuable to me . And so it made me okay with it all . So I kind of he aled in this really loving way and I sort of sat with my teenage self. I felt like she was on stage because I went through all these songs I'd written some of them when I was sixteen and I was like, Go on, you fucking sorted us out for a whole life . That's pretty amazing . Thank you, seventeen year old sixteen year old Kate for like taking care of life in such an incredible way . And I felt yeah, I was like, I'm good with you. I'm good with whatever the daily mail or internet or people or whoever have said it doesn't actually matter because you've done this. And that's what my whole life is sort of about now. Then you moved to LA. Then I moved to L A. Like what like how did that happen? So I made an album there in twenty twelve and I had an acting manager there and it just became a bit of a escape. Once I made this record there I went through a breakup. I made all these friends through kind of making music and having an acting manager and it was what I think is interesting because you went to the Brit school. Yeah . And you've done what society doesn't allow artists to do , which is you've flip flopped. I do. Yeah. Acting , singing, acting, singing. Normally you're a singer and then you go and do a bit of acting and they go, Oh no, they've done acting like that. Yeah. You've brilliantly straddled the two. Was that a conscious decision when you were at the Brits like, right, this is what I want to be. I want to be both things? I think yeah , I grew up writing songs, music felt like the predominant , I would say like calling, I suppose. That's music is my way of expressing myself. Yeah . And then I studied the at theat Brerit School and I loved theater and you know, had I not done that, I wouldn't have made of bricks. Doing theatre made me comfortable with myself in a way that I think doing a music course wouldn't have because I had to sit in these silences and create plays from scratch and you know perform in the silence of the theatre it's really intimate and you do as an actor have to sort of shed from yourself to sit on stage and be another character. So I think that helps me find my own voice in a way kind of weirdly shedding stuff about yourself helps you sort of find yourself again. So when you went to LA was it like a conscious decision to explore that side of yourself a bit more Yes, it was two things. It was I'd gone through a breakup, I'd got dropped by my label. I made a punk record in . Can I just also say sorry? So brave No No , it was like is what I love No, I did mad . I love thank God. What was that MME? NME said something about it. Kate Nash's creative career suicide sounds amazing. And it sounds amazing. Is that not the best great ? That's what you are. Yeah . You have done this unimaginably brave thing. You've jumped off and you've done something you wanted to do and it's fucking great . I will just like push the big red button in the room Yeah, sort of despite the consequences sometimes I don't mean have that and how did it how did sorry, we will get back to LA interrupting you. You were angry. I was raging. Yeah. It was female rage. Yes. It was female rage. It was how I'd been treated by the media , how I was boxed in by my label. They told me, oh, I don't like that voice. It sounds like you're screaming like a little girl. And I was like, well, the hell's wrong with screaming like a little girl. That's cool. I think that's really punk. I was in a weird relationship, the media, this that and the other and I just was like, you know, I needed to let the rage out and it's very powerful . It was it was. That was one of those albums where I thought, I need to make this or I'm gonna die. You know, was that female , youthful, like I'm at war with like the misogyny and how I've been treated and how this fame thing and how people see me and just what I want to do is like make art and music and have community and put on shows. And punk was really important to me and so I found my outlet for all of that in that kind of punk music. It was quite rare what I was doing. I fired my band. I hired all women . No one was doing that at the time. I got really emotional watching Chapel Row and actually at Redding because she has a full female band and I was like, she's the biggest pop star in America like over here in so many countries and she is an all female band when I did it, no one was doing it . Soundcheck felt like we had to prove ourselves to crew members. And I just thought, how cool? But at that time I did feel those young girls are looking at me. They don't necessarily relate to me , but there should be a woman on stage doing each job. There should be like my lighting engineer should be a woman, my sound engineer should be a woman. Like we need first of all I need more female company on the road and I also just need examples of women in music because if you want to be feminist, you have to also create those positions. I'm an employer, I guess I realized I'm an employer. So I was on this war rampage and I'd made this album in LA, so I had friends there , and I just kept going back. And when I felt bad at home, I would go there. And then I started dating people and I got a manager there and like a music manager, which was the one that st'sopped for me. But it became this sunny people are like, how are you? You know, this like, have a nice day thing. I fucking needed that. I needed sunshine and blue sky and people to be , wow, you're a musician. That's amazing. You've had a number one record. Incredible. And now you have a whole other career. So cool. Instead of, oh, you just had one hit when you were eighteen. You're nothing. You know, like the sort of British attitude of just like wow, prove yourself for the rest of your life even though we do love that song but fuck you and you're just like okay it's quite a weird attitude that we have here and I needed LA at that time . so And I got there . I think it's I think it melted my I think had I not done it, I just would have if I stayed in London I would have become really paranoid . Really? Oh everyone's looking at me judging me. They know me as this and I sort of would have stayed in that shell or is, in L A, I could be new. I could be in my twenties and I could go, who am I? Who am I as an adult? Who am I? Find figure out who I am, you know , which everyone's doing in their twenties, but without the media without this sort of voice the heat. Yeah . And then it sort of yeah cultivated with me getting glow because I had gone, I'd also like to give this acting thing a proper go I'm an audition and so for anybody that didn't get to see it's still on Netflix. Yes. Everybody can see it. Yes. If you didn't see it, I'm just gonna speak to camera. I never do this, but go watch it. It's really , really good and heartwarming and life affirming and moving . It's it's everything and weird and iconic . Well, you tell everybody sorry I was about to launch in No, you tell everybody what it was about. So Glow is the gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling. It was a real show in the eighties . It was the first time they put lady wrestlers on TV and there's a documentary about it . You have to watch the documentary. Oh my gosh . Unreal. Send me that. Yeah. So they were real wrestlers. And a lot of them weren't from wrestling backgrounds . They were just wanting to be on TV shows and they had the good girls and the bad girls and they lived in a hotel together for real . And it was the eighties, so it was unnoticed. God, wait, so this was Ontaly in the eighties. Yeah . I totally like missed this. Yeah. It became a kids show really. Big brother or something, you know , like everybody living together in a hotel And sort of that wasn't really, you know, they weren't like treated the best . There was there's some girls saying like we had these chainsaws and the audience thought there was no real they were real. You know, the sort of health and safety that didn't exist in the eighties applied to that situation and wrestling , which is quite, you know , a wild industry. Predominantly, historically, always men. Exactly. I've never seen it was this first and it became a kids show, but they also had songs . So they used to rap in the ring and it's just ridiculous , really bizarre, really weird raps girls that can't really sing or rap, you know? I saw that one with you. Yeah. Yeah. And that's based on how it really was. Brilliant. And they did all these weird skits and then that would turn into like the storylines of the wrestling characters . So it was based on these real women. And then ours is obviously a fictionalized sort of comedy drama of these women in LA who end up learning to wrestle. And it was very meta because that was what we were doing too. How hard was it to learn ? It is quite hard to learn to wrestle. Yeah, it's amazing. It's quite scary, but it's a good kind of pain as well. There's like something about pain in that physical fight . I mean, once you 're into that, that's what's so funny. Your sisters have basically trained you for that. They had hard. They trained me so well. They train meed so well and all those punches to the head but it's like for anybody else it would have been an assault but you were like it was like yeah this is a walk in the park compared to being with my sisters. It was such a thrill to hit the mat and feel the adrenaline and learn to take the pain and at the beginning of training after a few seasons it would be like or after season one or two we'd be said you've got ring rust you, run the ropes and kind of tough en up and you do get this kind of strength. It's a bit like touring. On the second day of tour is the worst day of tour because you have this bangover from like your head neck and you go see because you've been dancing. You've moved and you're just not tour You've just done one gig and you feel destroyed and you think how am I going to do this for six years? Yes. But halfway through, you're just tough and stamina. Yeah, you've got stamina, your muscles are all warmed up and but wrestling it gave me a physical connection to myself that I'd never had before. And Char Guerrero, who's a wrestling legend from a family of wrestling legends, he was our coach. Chave was so great with us. He was the least sort of PC trained person to have in with us , but the most safest the guerrero name like taught the original Glow Girls. That's why I think it was quite witchy because weird stuff happened on set. Gone . Stuff would happen that would be happening to people in real life that they would then show up in the script and would become part of the storylines and we were like, that's it. We'd call it a glowen. The girls would be like another gloom and it's a glowman, and I'm like, God, it's a glowen because something would be happening and then like would be happening to one of the girls and then like similar storylines would show up in I just think women altogether we ch'anreneling these real women is like sinking periods. I mean, of course we sink periods. It was we would get in so much trouble from the first AD. The first AD I think like quit on the first season seems like these girls you just can't control them. We'd be being told to shut up and like Alison Breed would be like leading a musical number and I mean the camaraderie and how close we were by episode one , because we'd already been in each other's crotches. And I think one of the girls was stretching and like queered like in my face on one of the mats, like before we'd even shot the first scene . We were really close . We were really close to in case anybody doesn't know what a queiff is. It's a fanny fart . Davinus. What it is? Teaching you guys again. Yeah , I can see that clipped up on Instagram . Women are feared because we have a community yes , of a bond , an invisible bond that we have with every woman in the world. I walk down the street and I see a woman and she looks at me and we just go like I got your back like she's also like thank you, Davina. And I love you and I'm so obsessed with you. And you're like, That's right But it's a no there is, there is that caderie. It's right if you come a woman crying, walking down the street at night or even doing the daylight, are you okay? I've always done that, do you? Yeah, yeah. If I sit on driving ways that you need lift. Yeah, right, like what's going on? I always do that as well. I get people Uber's home if they're too drunk to order one or something on a bedroom like you really need. I'll sit with you and I wait for it. Anybody watching this, please take a leaf out of do that . Yeah. But I think a lot of girls do help that people , right? Yeah. Well, any man watching. Yes. Let's make the world try a little bit. So you glow. Yeah, we know what glow is now. Yes. You got this part . It was literally made for you. Did you have the knowing? Yes, I did. I did. What did that feel like? So it's funny because the reason I got audition for Glow is because I did a pilot for Jenny Cohen and Gus Vanc ou that never came out about the Salem Witch trials. It was called The Devil You Know and I played a character called Bridget Bish op and I played Rhonda Richardson in Glow and I just like that alliteration. Bridget Bishop was a real witch, you know, from the eighteen hundreds. Got another part literally made for you. Oh , and it was this incredible experience in Boston and based on history and very much like the audition was like putting piss in cake and like I stuck a thing up a woman's vagina in the woods and kissed Earn and then I'm like like, you know, I was, Oh, I love this . It's like insane. And we all thought that was going to get made, it didn't get picked up. I got the opportunity to then audition for Glow because Jenny knew me . And I felt that witch show. And then when I got the opportunity, I was like, I'm getting this, I'm getting this. I just knew it just felt so right , you know, I don't know what that is, but it just feels when you're like, this I can actually a hundred percent do. This fits me like a glove. I can do this, you know? And yeah, I did have that sort of I'll do anything to prove I can do it and get it. But I just did a scene and then I did an audition tape of Britannica, the wrestling character because our characters had wrestling characters. And so I did one of the songs I did this like weird little tape. I don't know, I did have that knowing. It' thes thing, isn't it? It's weird that. It's weird. Because yeah, a lot of the time you're just shooting in the dark with stuff, but I do come back to feeling like some things really do feel like they're meant to happen. Yeah. And I think I think we have loads of choices and loads of directions that we can go, but every now and then you get to this point and it's like, Oh, this is going to spin you there . And also sometimes you need a win . Yes. Sometimes you need a win and I needed a win and I got glow and I was like all that praying finally No, but just in career feels like you need a win size. I'm always talking about the universe . Yeah You know, when I look out for myself, I've got my back and when I haven't got my back the universe has yeah and something happens and I do have a sense of that spirituality and connection to that No, it really do like you know, gut instinct , intuition , you know, magic and fairies and whatever you want to call it, universe, like connection to something bigger than ourselves . And every now and then there's a real strong feeling about it. And sometimes there isn't and it's confusing. But when there is, yeah, it's annoying, isn't it? The thing that I'm channelling love into at the moment is is Rayban Meta lets you explore the world without a screen getting in the way. So you can stay present in the moment. Hey Meta, tell me what kind of dessert this is. That's a stroop waffle, a Dutch waffle with spiced syrup in the middle. Is it sweet? Yes, perfect for a snack or dessert. Delicious. Get answers on the go without interrupting your flow. Ray Van Meta, iconic style meets Meta AI , available at Walmart and other authorized retailers. Experience a membership that backs what you're building with American Express Business Platinum. Get two times membership rewards points per dollar on eligible purchases in key business categories, as well as on each eligible purchase of five thousand dollars or more, and up to two million dollars in eligible purchases per calendar year . American Express Business Platinum There's nothing like it . Terms apply. Learn more at AmericanExpress dot com slash business platinum . I get so many headaches every month. It could be chronic migraine, fifteen or more headache days a month, each lasting four hours or more. Botox autobotulinum toxin A prevents headaches and adults with chronic migraine. It's not for those who have fourteen or fewer headache days a month. Prescription Botox is injected by your doctor . Effects of Botox may spread hours to weeks after injection causing serious symptoms. Alert your doctor right away as difficulty swallowing, speaking, breathing, eye problems or muscle weakness can be signs of a life threatening condition. Patients with these conditions before injection are at high est risk. Side effects may include allergic reactions, neck and injection site pain, fatigue and headache. Allergic reactions can include rash, welts, asthma symptoms and dizziness. Don't receive Botox if there's a skin infection. Tell your doctor your medical history, muscle or nerve cond itions including ALS Lugari's disease, Myasthenia Gravis or Lambradein syndrome, and medications, including botulinum toxins, as these may increase the risk of serious side effects. Why wait? Ask your doctor, visit Botox Chronic Migraine . com or call one eight hundred Botox to learn more . Venues Okay, and I know that you've got some big thoughts about this. And I you and I , I think we were reborn in nightclubs . Yeah . I was I found myself grand dancing dance floor. Yeah . And yeah, it's important . I follow all the kind of EDM accounts on Instagram , but all the small venues they can't afford to stay open . And my government is making it almost impossible and the taxes on alcohol and makes it impossible for these venues to stay open . So they're all closing , which has a knock on effect for DJs, musicians , kids , where are you going to go and release your tension, your stress ? How can you let go? How can you hear of new things? It's so important. How do musicians start? Like you started development with a broken ankle, we play the guitar going right when this is done, I'm going to gig and you could . Yes, I could afford to do it. Yes. Thirty Krid would actually buy me some drinks at the bar and I could say, you know , it's so hard for young people. Now I don now't think people are thinking through this pipeline. What will Glaston Relineup look like in twenty years? I don't know, because I don't know what UK artists will have been able to develop into what I'm saying like I have with my bandmates . Flow state, pr practacticeice, , practice, practice, practice. Practice is really important. Practice your craft. If you can't actually practice it . This is why I went down the music avenue first because I couldn't practice acting because I couldn't get into a university to do it . So I couldn't , if you don't get given a job , it was like, I can book a gig, I can go and do a gig. And like doing shows and playing music has made me a better performer. The more I do it, the better I get. That's the cool thing about performance is it's something always new to discover, right ? And the government are actually trying to help now, and I think we do have the ear of MP's. And I was invited to Parliament to speak at a music venue trust event where all the MPs I told them shut up and like listen to me. Got them to put their fingertips in the air for foundations . Yeah, because it was one of those rooms where the sound if people talk like a wedding where it's like, why is it so loud? Everyone's just talking at like this volume but it will just the volume like just talk and everyone's drinking champagne and I was like, I'm going to lose them. I have to walk through the crowd tell everyone to shut up because I'm here to talk about something really important and you all know who I am. So listen because I've got experience, twenty years of experience under my belt and I'm telling you that this is a massive problem. Even me it's, massive . Even me, I have, you know, a catalog that's even though Universal take eighty percent of it, I'm still earning a living from it . I'm selling out venues, I have thousands of fans, millions of streams , you know, I can book the tours and people will come and I'm losing so much money doing it. This is insane. So how is anyone who has less than I 'm insane? I mean, I started an Only Fans account and a campaign called Butts for Tour buses to get attention, obviously , but also to genuinely make up for the losses and try to get all my invoices in before Christmas and like can I tell you something about your Only Fans thing for me ? It was about the most punk thing I've ever heard in my life. Thank you for getting it. Oh my god, I so got it. Yeah. I was like it just I really, really , really love you for that . Firstly, because it really highlighted how absolutely messed up. Yes the music industry is. Yeah , that you can not make a living at your millions of streams and access. Thousands of people might of streams . Well, how much do you get on Spotify per stream? Nor point Nort three of a penny, I think it is pastream. It doesn't add up to very much. It's insane . And then depending on who the rights holders are. But the two of them point their fingers at each other. So Spotify responded to me recently and they were like, Well, we're not really in control of like who holds the rights to cate's music. And we've paid out over five hundred thousand pounds to one of her songs. I'm like, First of all, there's not enough money. Twenty years of like that song was over a hundred million streams. That's not enough money. Insane twenty years in the olden days of records, what that would have a hundred million records sold? Yeah . And people just aren't being paid fairly for their work. No. And then what's happened with the music live music side of things is it's so expensive to put on a gig , the cost the same as everyone else at home, you know, the cost of living in crisis, everything's gone up. So when I there's less rehearsal rooms now because in the pandemic rehearsal rooms shut down or people that used to rent out gear and vans. A lot of them closed. So everything's a bit more expensive. Even before going on tour, I spent thousands on wages that have gone up. Rightly so, obviously I believe I want to pay people well, but wages go up, rehearsal room costs go up, renting a van or a bus has gone up in price, the petrol has gone up . Printing merch has gone up. Now venues are taken a percentage of the merch that's also gone up . Eating food has gone up, hotel costs have gone up, but musicians' fees for some reason , none of our stuff goes up. The value of our music' gsone down . And I mean, when you say it like that , that is nuts. Yeah, and I'm not putting on insane shows. I'm not because of the amount of men in my DM's telling me that they'd love to be my tour manager and fix all my problems . Please fuck off . I have really a great team and I'm making a choice, Divina, to keep a human band . Right. Yeah, I know I could just stand on stage with backing tracks and cash in. But I have something really special and I believe in live music and I love musicians. And I think that culture has the right to exist. And I believe I have the right to be able to afford to pay for that twenty years in. If you don't fight, it will literally fuck it. It will disappear. It will disappear . And yeah, I have a lighting engineer and a sound person . And like if I do a London show, I might put a bit extra into the show. But I'm not doing crazy stuff, you know, I'm not building huge sets and you know pyrotechnics or stuff that cost loads of money and bringing in extra it's like it's a quality of its standard. It's like the standard I set for my show that I believe I have earned , that the sound and the lights and my band shapes to be there. Yeah . I'm not asking for the heavens. Of course, I would do more if I could, but the basics , I have to cover. I have to. People are paying tickets to come and see me for twenty years. It's got to be a good show . And you just I was like, if I can't do it, you know , how are people ? And I'm seeing the results of like young people but they're, you know, in thirty, thirty two, thirty three, they can't go on tour, they can't do shows. They're stuck, they're stuck, and they're some of the most talented artists that we have in this country. And we pride ourselves on a world with a cutting edge London, UK, like we are culture. It's like you're fucking killing it and it's not going to be there. It's not going to be there if you don't protect it , have to protect it, nurture it. How can we support you? Oh my only fans. com for us Kate now should know. But wait, say that again slower. Only let's just say it. Well, to support me. Yeah, to support you personally to help . Only fans. com forward slash Kate Nash. Thank you. I was saying to people on Tour I would say don't stream my music 'cause that might help . Buy it if you want to buy it, bandcamp , I mean stream it, it's fine. It's sarcasm. I know people stream, but it does if you stream an artist, it doesn't support them financially . So don't have any delusions about that. Buy the merch, buy their own fans And write to MP's the government, I think, is the way forward because these massive companies live . When we write to our MPs, what are we asking for? What do we need them to do? So if we music , yeah. So you write them to tell them that you care about music , that it's why it's important to you, and that you're worried about the cost of touring crisis, you're worried about seeing venues in your local areas closed . That is really depressing. Yeah, and that you think that musicians should be paid fairly for their work, that you value their work. There's a fan led review , my friend Sam Duckworth and the Music Venue trust are doing a lot of work to if you believe that we live in a democratic society, then this is why data is so important, right? Because fans voices really matter because that is democracy. If the public think something and tell the government something, the government is supposed to act. That's what we believe we live in a democratic society. So collecting fan led data could help us change the industry . So follow the Fan Led Review and participate in the surveys . And that will help us I think the only route forward is changing the law. I don't think these companies that make millions are going to change the law . And I just want everybody to take a leaf out of your book because I think people sometimes as a fan, you can think , well, what difference am I going to make? You are going to make a difference. Be one of the scratches in the tunnel. We need all of you . I was told just be a little scratch and look where the scratches led. Yes . Exactly freedom. Exactly. I did do it . So the day that I had my London show and I was doing all the Only Fan stuff, I went and did this protest where this bus save our scene have this bus and they were like, We could put your bum on the back of a bus and we can go around London. I was like, yes, let's do it. We went to Parliament. We went to Live Nation, and we went to Spotify, and I was there with like a megaphone. And people were getting like velvet sofas delivered into the Spotify building and I'm there like, hey artist fairly and I get to the venue and I said to my manager, I said, I think I think I've gone too far . I've thrown a brick through a window and she was like, literally . I said, No, no, no, not literally, but I just don't think there's any going back from here . But I don't care, I don't care. I hate this expectation. Can I just share at my legs? It's injustice. There's a lot of here In I think it was two thousand two , I presented the Brits and Brandon Block , one of his mates at his table, said ,'ve You won an award mate and he hadn't. But he came up to an acceptance award that wasn't his no. And Ronnie then he had a fight with Ronnie Wood. Oh I was going to dazze and it was oh my god it was so brilliant and it was because yeah it was punk spirited spirited and it's been neutralized . Everything's no one's dialed and yeah, you've gotten no one's real. Yeah. Everyone's pretending I'm getting my ars out and you're showing out in the throwing the brick through the wall. Megakes, you know, I've got a few to spare . But like, thank you because it's empowering. It matters it does . It matters. They can't get away with this. These people have firsthand, I've had firsthand experience of it. I'm angry. That anger has not gone away just because I made girl talk. You know what, I'll say to them . Next time next time , next time you try and take me out. Don't miss don't miss because I will not give up . I am from like Irish stubbornness. Do you know what that means? You're the middle child. I'm a redhead for you. You're a red slider. You messed with the wrong woman . Like I will keep going until I'm in a coffin and like and if I'm a ghost, I'll do it when I'm a ghost. But I just , there's dreams I have for my career. There's things I want to achieve. But before that, I would sabotage them all. Yes, to get vengeance. No, not really vengeance. To make a discover ies to make it possible for people to have to have this path , to have done what I did because it'll be a dead end . It'll be for nothing. If it can't if it can't carry on , what's the point? If there's no community and lineage and like you can't inspire like who inspired me and made it possible for me? Like what is the point? Also more importantly as well, you as an artist connect people . How am I going to connect with other people without music? Without without younger generations without being able to come out and do it. You bring people together . And we do value that, we do value that , but we're not putting any actual monetary value on it . And that is the world we live in. We need that monetary value for younger generations for there to be future artists, which I think in a world where you know, like I watched a documentary on iPlayer called Once Upon a Time in Northern Ireland, amazing documentary. And it shows Belfast at the height of the troubles where you couldn't park your car and leave it on its own without the army just blowing it up because it was so dangerous and like so violent in a city . And it was this metal gated where there was just like shopping and that was it and people would just sort of there was no exist ence . And then you know, what came out of that, a guy who almost got dragged into a car and killed one night and he said, You know, if I'm going to die I want to die, do what I love. And he opened a record shop and people traveled the country to go there because they wanted to be with each other and listen to music and meet people. And then they went to a punk venue and it would be you didn't discuss religion. Everyone was mixed and they watched punk bands and it was like culture matters . It does matter . It without it, you know, we just have ads. That documentary really inspired me to remind me as well that , you know, in these political times , you can sort of become really casual about all this violence that's happening . And in the dock, this character who's not character is a real guy, who owned the record shop, he says they're like, I wanted to tell my kids when they say, Daddy, what did you do in the troubles? They said, I partied . I had a good time. You know, I drank, I did drugs, I went to punk shows and I like I didn't kill anyone, you know ? And that's really , really valuable to hear in these like aggressive times. So I just passionately want to see things change because I have dedicated my life to participating in culture and putting music at the forefront, right? And we're not doing that for nothing so that it all just goes away. It's first of all it's ancient. You can't erase it from humans wanting to connect like that. But I just I hate the exploitation and how badly these people have treated artists and other artists on board with you . I think a lot of artists care, a lot of artists are quite scared to speak out. I've had so many people message me since I've sort of started out but they don't privately. But also they've been able to share some of my content and some of it's gone viral because it is the collective feeling that can amplify your voice as well as members of the public like get on board . And some people, to be fair, if they're on major labels, it's really hard for them to speak out . And people do get blacklisted. You know , I am aware that I have burnt some bridges, but I'm okay with that . I'm okay with that. And I think I'll be fine. I just think, you know, like I said, next time, don't miss because everybody owes you basically because yeah, they do no , you have. You've been honest when it's cost you . It's cost you but you don't care and that's really rare . I do get a kick out of it. I do get a kick out of it. I do think it's my heritage. I just think I'd rather that's what I'm saying. Like all these dreams I have, I think I'll feel more satisfied if I have made a difference and sort of taken down some of the baddies , maybe it's the Catholic in me or something I don't know . Interesting thing that was so difficult for you at the beginning, the thing that was , you know, the shame and the guilt and everything, but actually justice right and wrong . Because I really believe in right and wrong, you know, and I say that with also allowing for human mess and people I think people can make mistakes . And I'd love for all these companies to turn around and say, Yeah, do you know what we're going to do the right thing? We're going to make it fair, but they're not going to do that. No. So we have to change the law and they better believe that that's happening. And actually, and actually I'm glad because it will be worse for them this way round. Because if they just did it themselves and came to meet us at the table they could probably get away with a bit less. But when we change the law, they'll really have to come and meet us at the line and we decide where the line is, you know? My varman and government . Oh my god Yes there's one more bit I want to do for you. We've got something for you and Molly's going to bring it to me now is a little present. What is it? This is from Helen . We've got you a little letter . I'm going to read it to you. Okay . Oh no, that's a quarter Are you ready? From Helen? Yes. So this is legit for my sister. Yeah , okay, okay . Dear Divina , I was meant to write a letter to Kate , but like you 'll have learnt in your conversation with her , we're not one for sticking to rules or very good at doing what we're told . Fortunately or maybe unfortunately for some , it runs in the family my God . Our lives have given us so many opportunities to start over again and again and again . Whether we wanted those opportunities for whether they were thrown at us, swerving our entire life projections , I feel like it made us all really adaptable to anything new , uncomfortable or unknown. Adaptable, yeah . I think this year is going to bring a whole new beginning again . I feel like that too. No, I feel like the world is beginning . Feels huge this year. Yeah, it does . Something seismic is coming . And when she said recently, I won't know what to do with myself once this is finished , it totally th rew me . I was confused thinking, What is she talking about? She always knows what to do . She's always got something up her sleeve, some battle or calls she has to get behind, some project she's been working on for months and years and she's just forgotten to mention I've never thought of her as someone who could feel lost or stop . I guess I forgot she was human like the rest of us and the relentless warrior that everyone sees if the same relentless one was the one we got at home , which is just as fucking annoying when your sister's fighting alas . I think looking back at all the new beginnings, whether that closed door she wanted to keep open or not . She'll realise entered the next room and ended up taking it over Suitcases splayed , opened, full of endless clothes, shoes and a comforting chaos that she thrives in. God, Helen's great with words. Wow . And hopefully now, as we're a bit older and wiser , she can be a bit kinder herself and take my most consistent advice Get a therapist and go on holiday for fuck's sake From one nash who can't switch off to another We were made to get back up and try again with tights full of ladders , knobbly concrete cuts in our knees and just keep stomping forward. That's true . Here are here forever to keep you grounded . Helen . That's the nicest thing she's ever said to me. Frame it . Frame it. She's going to punch you the next time she sees you fine . She knocked my teeth out I can't, I'm in shock . I'll cry when I get home. You know, I can't how nice is that ? I'm so happy for you