Workplace Easter Eggs and Final Emails

Ity Malim now So the time is right now. We're open a buull of the em mails now. I wonder who has emailed in now and grrace you is he mailed in now? And Sally too is emailed in now And Joh and Barbar and a Michel's email didn youve emailed in now We gotta readem out. We gotta readem out My back time L fr of Ay.. It's good enough for you. It's good enough for me. happappy Friday happappy Friday Oh. Oh fucking out. C back to the last four episodes. O. Okay, welcome everybody. It's the weekend It could be anything Do you know what I'm thinking? What have we asked for recently I don't know what we've asked for, I feel like there's some things I'll be like, Ohh, I hope someone's sent in some Yeah Well, I'll let you tell me you went to latest one. Could we do the latest? latest one, rightight This is from Daniel. Listen to your the cure wet Dream app. I don't say wet dream. I know what you're saying. What's the wet dream happen? Where I was like a group piece to the cure group piece U No I can't remember. Growing up where Robert had a house, we used to see him driving around White for it. Mercedes G wagon with blacked out windows So maybe the Vitara is not so weird Fcs I't understand any of that. He's basically saying you a better version of the Suzuki Vitara And what is relevance Suzuki Futara Have you lost yourob Memory I can't remember fuck off we've done so many apps if I meant to remember everything You remember the Kure Group piece I went to see? Oh, have we had a dream You're a wet dreamer. I don't know why I said wet dream e Yeah but it wasn't a dream. it was real. No, it was real. Yeahes. so I'm trying to remember a dream. Oh o F Feddies, Feddies. Oh the two the people that I thought were a bit off. They weren't off. Well they came across in the story that they were off He have one of those cars todayady We fucking love one of those cars. H I rememember that episode? Yeah. ye I still think they were a bit strange No, they wasn't hand. Well, it might have been strange. You'dt be young, you could have I can't believe you grew up where Robert had a house and he used to see him driving in a ra that I would have blown my Next letter, please tell him to stop. Go back a bit This is from Paul. morning, evening. Delighted to hear my old areas being discussed during recent David in London episodes I used to live in Moswell Hill, parents still do. Bounds Green was our nearest tube station and my secondary school was in Finchley. However, I do support and endorse the location of your preremier Inn in Newth Southgate as awful now live on the suunshine coast an hour north of Brisbane Thank you for reading and sharing this email Wow Wh' wing it What you wearing it It lives in Brisbane. Yeah Okay, I just wanted to know what you're wearing it. Oh shit, I didn't say thank you for your email to the last guy Ill just say it Right. You know, it's nice someone say, yeah, I come around that and it is a bit of a shit. I feel so bad for saying all these things about. Thank you very much, everybody. I really appreciate that. Thank you for saying that what I said about her hary being shit That you're right is holesome I feel like I'm going mad. I don't feel like everything's the same. It's just like, isn't that what you wal cozy? No. I feel like'm just I feel I've done the same thing eight times on the ps, including the last stair we just recorded everyone to pick a letter out. Trying to work out why I'm having the same response over and over and over again We stuck. G on. Stop. Don we don't even want the let us. What? Oh, Jamie Heron. Hi lads, couldn't agree more with David regarding London. It's hell on earth. Too busy, toooo much going on. as David said, you're permanently on edge Let we have some fucking sunshine Well, you got a pick just people. Well that's why I did golden moments. You didn't want golden moments. You my fucking golden moments. I just thought about golden moments the other day because I was walking down my alleyway that I said I liked and you would been done. And then golden moments just back. Golden moments a little bit more than that than just an alleyway. It's about loads of loads of like you could the go alleyway would be part of a golden moment Cool, Takes these things straight Uh Oh, this is nice. here's something sweet. M your like Hi gents, this's from Joke. My mum used to cook my siblings and I a lovely breakfast before school each morning The second she' handed us bacon sandwiches or toast the food back off our plate and shove in our own mouth shouting snooze you lose and chew aggressively to make us laugh. I never failed to make us ggle. What's the about the back off swweet parent thinks parents said it was sweet. Yeah, that's good Yeah like that. Yeah. Oh here we go, Mundane Mum So it's mundane things your parents did when you look back, it's quite sweet. Mane m. Approximately twice a year my mum used to iron my Sebutio pitch. Al on a Sunday and often whilst watching heartbeat or London's burning Oh, that's such a lovely memory In there Do you know what I can remember M brrouer. doing this with theut put light out Now if his chin down like that doing that ooth They sliffers smooth, aren't they? They that that for ages my. Oh God this is from Gary Coburn I love darts I play darts on my brakes at work Don't knock it until you've destroyed it. When made you slack off dark? You did You did. I bought a dartance board and you laughed at me and I said, Be careful how you talking because lots of people like dartance Be careful. St still don't feel terrible You are. You are No I just don't feel particularly bad about Simid do. Oh This is from Mark Proven Sent A month ago. My mum who's eighty in a few months had been having a lot of leg pain for a few years and her mobility wasn't great. Myself and my partner decided to get one of those big furry slippers that you can get both feet into at once. The big slipper vibrated and heated up. When I ph a couple of days later, she proudly said she was sitting on the sofa B both their feet in a up ny responded o well, you are surely feeling bad good you know. What's out of the back of good mums? St on home Mum's vaginas. Mum get feat into their famanies section I get a lot of those Yeah, we got laads actually over the previous week. has to be your momum C canan't be somebody know strict rules Yeah, can't be somebody else M. It's going be you mum and her Fanny And a bat this eight Okay now Here we go, you like these ones from Rachel Racel, Rachel Listening from Catalonia in Spain, My dad swears he went to primary school with a lad called Eli Fant Eife at eleant It' so elephant. I love these so much. Ey fant. fat was the one that we took ages to work out on then Howed with a few weeks ago. Oh Shing tuna. Oh yeah. Salmon tuna salmon, tina salmon? Tina salmon, T salmon This is from Stuart Bellis. justust wondered if your editor is James Da or Jamie as I would know him, if so I went to school with him and he's a good friend of my brother. Yes, he is. Oh. Yeah. Oh! Lovely Bleep it out if you want, Joe. He's called Stuart Benis Yeah There you go. Yeah Fantastic herit to it through it Yeah. H we go. from Craig Maddox Celebs, I served in Tesco I had a sadday job at Tesco Sperstore in Huntington in my youth. During that time I worked on the deli counter, meeat counter, fish couns and chicken counter I got to wear a lovely silly hat which left a dent in my fashionable late nineties French crop. During that time, I served Norma Major, who was the wife of the current prrime Minister at the time Joh Major. She bought a Sotch egg for him. I also served Sidoim I can't remember what he bought.e? s Oh, I'm thinking of carry on. That's not sitoing. That's s J standanders It was at that wedding I went to. Remember the millionaire wedding I went to? When I was in my twenties Pepp jeans, anything that to do with? Yeah Pepp Jeanres I think ye, he was there Any millionaire story's got Ppppee jeans man in it Hi Joan Dave, we hope you're both well, B big fan of the podcast. It always brings me comfort during stressful times. Please find attach my impression of both of you Oh my god. This could be horrendous. This could shatter me, by the way. Same air Mine will have a giggle in it. Of course mine have a giggle in it. Mine will be miserable and just Punky. Punky, yeah, Punky web Hey we guys. Oh God. Oh if he's amazing. Is that him? No, no All right here we go, fuck This is my impression of yoursel, Joe David. You're a square, right I need to fuck you square. Why are you calling me a square? Oh bring it off for the god. Well, I was the one saying why are you calling me a square A she. Oh sure was New York What did you What did he say is you? Listen again,'s take our time listen. What did he say as you so I can hear it This is my impression all about yourself Davids. You're a square, right You're square, mate. I just sound Australia I' gonna fuck you square. Why are you calling me a square? No one's called Anthony after the Godd Che it out mate I'm glad it wasn't frightenly accurate Just chit out. That felt like a lot of get on with your. A L lot of build up to I've got nothing to say Isn't it Thank you for yourount. Thank you for your attachment He's at the University of Dundee I think S him did Now he must be twenty one listening to us. much Master I did a gig at Dumby University Did you? Yeah, did a fucking megaphy something withith who? Nas old's manan alive. and mayay as Ozmanalo. Yeah. I sort of remember the name. Yeah L andM Was that bl? Was that one? No, that's a different one Man fuck I think it was Steve Williams. right. He was headlining. U tellell me when stop. stop Iark knows all this is from Charlotte y? Six weeks ago. Regarding the only me then, Pod I think that wass one of your ideas I seriously love the pod and look forward to every episode. Had to email after the recent pod doing it, Joe came up with a new section which Chat GPT called it O N then becausecause Chris Moles already does it Calling it that means there's no dud judgment. thought that might make you ponder on this new I don't know what this is. I I can't rem know what the section was. It'll see didn't stick with me Oh. Oh was I think it was like stuff you didn't know Oide Oh, o I know is when you took your flowers plants to your friend Yeah I say Chris Morris is Chris Mallis is called the stupid Anesty Right, everythingvery's been done, andn't it Yeah, thank you. Yeah. Well yeah, it obviously works as an idea, so Um en agree he Crunch Crunch gentlemen, longt timee biscuit first time emailer. I've just listened to the pood about David's new dart board I also have a dart board set up in my office I every morning and play and play darts before and sometimes during my working day, it's therapy for me. Yeah, yeah, I get that You can zw out Yeah, totally get that. Well playied great old response from David, that one, didn't it? Yeah I get it because you're just you're just like bang, bang bank gets it's not genuinely not about the numbers, which're just You're in a sort of Totally get that Ben and any other darks player Yeah, I think so yeah. This from Foreign. wo segment ideas. Oh This's so weird, what fills you with dread? I' this then? I wasn good got a medical condition or something. First, the writ's room, you have people email in with their sitcom script ideas. you then use your That's what I was saying Second out there This might be up to your street, though. The financial freedom and race. Well, this is gonnaest out on ITV four and it You get a group of Chattervigs to take part in the competition person ups one hundred pound and then has to see how much money they can make They then every two weeks send in voice notes have joined on their progress first to a certain amount I think that's like a YouTube thing, isn't it? Someone goes, I've turn this B pen into to buy the house You seen that? right. there go. I so this beck pen P this I bet you clicked on that faster than No no. was fking did financial. I thought that was sort of Yeah As soon as it seemed like a lot of work Exactly. But have you seen those videos where someone goes, I want this B pen for a ruler And then I feel know that on websites whatever And I saop this ruler For a shoe. I's got this shoe and now I've got a three bed house in Lightonstone. No. Well the he up cyclist right there. That' a good thing. I think it's bullocks. U James, have some music, please. Boy So This is. That's what Ange' soil. This is Andge This is Angela Doyle's golden moment. Just to let you know, Angela, Joe went. No, I did not. I head felt like you'd been shot by now. No, I didn't. I love. I recently travelled to Queenstown, New Zealand from Australia with six of my lifelong best friends, seven women, agge fifty three. We did a floating sauna. That'ult sitting in a sauna with a glass wall looking out over Lake Wagon Wakatipu. The remarkable mountains in the background, sunset and jumping in the freezing cold lake from time to time to cool down The Glden moment came when after this, we all went to a little Japanese restaurant in a lane way and had an Isu soup. I was hit with a feeling of peak happiness as we sat and sipped the delicious I really like those. Yeah, I do. I just I don't You don't I do, I don't know. I feel like I ask It's a nice moment, but you know that feeling you get is so Rre, you just go, I am so happy right now Yeah right now She had it with her friends like Wakatipoo sipping delicious Misu. Misu sup happiness Gaming on drugs There we go. M in useon a kid. Oh hang on, we got let's do this one Easter eggs in the workplace. God. Y brother. stop he's gonna stop the car now. After listening to the last few episodes where Joe's brother's idea of Easter eggs in the workplace has been mentioned, I think understand where he's From great And I think it's a great idea for a section. Okay, cool The idea, as I see it, is things you've done in your workplace, that you've done for people to try and spot quirky that may go unnoticed for a long time payoff is when people spot it as the case may be Anyway, it's str My brother's really open this. It's this exciting. so far it sh lot You know, we talked about this on footboard. He gave the same example . He said all the lofts. Well Mum and dad part of Mum and Dad's old phone number I was like I just said that one again So you's not proving it's not fs Well, here's James' exam It reminded me of a little thing I did when I was around twenty years old working in a popular local nightclub as a bar suppor Bossible, possible You hold up there. The nightclub was owned by a large company, Rank Leisure And so we would regularly have the company newsletter dropped off on the staffroom table I rarely took notice if it of it as it was just corporate bollocks. But this one time on the front page was our district manager and his wife all doled up at one of the company's fancy dues me being the creative type I took a copy of the newsletter home and cut out the heads of said manager and his wife. shift I went to the staff room where no one was around and stuck the heads on the male and female signs for the staff toilets The signs were above the doors, so not in plain sight, but the signs stayed like that for weeks before You might say. I don't think it's Robper's idea, but I don't think Rob's going Yes, yes S yeah, I knew it would work. I knew I think it's been the nail in the coffin if I'll be honest the sign stayed like that for weeks before somebody noticed the face then it was all everyone could talk about Everyone finding it hilarious. say so much so I'm doing a few more signs Oh you stupid man, Jake. got fucking over carried away. The footballer Robby Fowler on a slippery floor sign was another one that got good belly luck I'm still enjoying it now Yeah I don't think I'm enjoying from the right. I'm enjoying James's blind spot That's what I'm enjoying. I am Thank. Doing these little things only I knew about waiting for someone to spot them was a real buzz. I may even start doing at my current place emoyment. Now my memories being shock Don't, James D where he d? donon't be that guy You've grown out of that guy Gosh U Oh you know, reminding me Colin, their Fast show character. Yeah Is it Colin the mad. Come in and . Oh Yeah A U She can tie is close Ooh, anyone f's against toilet. You might want to look at the slippery side Oh fuckking know. I can brill it. Thank you very much. Could do one more than I've got to go Yeah. Hi David, it's from Alan. Hi David and Joe. Yes, I have also spent hours on speed or we and super tennis There was one weekend spent on Aid playing Daytona racing They keep it writing in about it Fucking now Oh God yeah, there's your so that's everything in his email. Yeah Alan, F eight years old, six foot five size twenty five feet. Oh fucker. size twenty five feet PL sh. He is And that's it, that's the end of the mailbag. Okay. God change this is brilliant L how that guy. I just f. just im messine ro like that. What hearing see that right out? No Robo. Where' James backing me up? Oh Rob to do wasn? To be fair, Rob'ost confidence in it. get mud him. He'll go. No, that's not my idea. He definitely will. Guys, no,'ll be fucked off for James I guanteeuck you will. You'll think James does his shit, reallyie? Yeah, and that's why he goes, No, don't fucking put me in the su. I James sa him and Rob were s connected He' distancing himself from James No, no, no. We know're D with. I was like no. Fuck. Can't wait to have that discussion at Mums. Oh fuck Oh God A then we're just God Almighty. And we'll have meet.ight? Well cheers everyone. Yeah, cheers. Have a lovely weekend. Thanks for writing in Yeah, thank you, James and everyone else. Yeah Thank Bye bye