Reflecting on life and mortality

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We've got premium hoodies, including our brand new Qadant hoodies with the updated logo, super soft t shirts, super soft for men and women and even tie die shirts All merch is available exclusively at clubraandom d. comot While you're there, catch up on recent episodes and grab some swag and bring a little random home. Once again, that's clubraandom dot com It's such a mystery Complete mess Yes. I don't care how much talent. No. You have clothnd it's all because we want to get high Here And your point is And my point is Holy shit. Hello. I didn't think it would happen until I saw it in person Are you really here I'm just so flattered youre you're here. I mean, you don't do a lot of stuff don't I am thank you so. I you' a big fan. Wow. I'm so y. I don't to sound like that remember in American beauty though kid who was like, there's so much beauty in a plastic bag. Yeses. I don't want to be that guy, but I feel very plastic baggy today because you know, I'm seventy, but I'm feeling fine. Right behind you Yeah, and you know, when you're this age, you've had shit. So like if you feel good Don't have to deal with a healthy. That's good day. It's a beautiful day in California. I get to talk to you. I get to have a drink, which I allow myself once a week Mostly you. I mean, I just You just don't do a lot so that you would come here is just very meaningful to me. I appreciate it. Well, what's interesting because I'm a big fan Don't miss your show. So When I got the invitation to come, I said, yes, and then I thought, what the hell am I doing Juanie, what are we gonna talk about? Well, we're not gonna have any problem. Okay I mean, if you've seen this thing, you know, I mean, I just I have no agenda, no questions I said when we started, if I'm going to do a podcast there's thirty a million, it's not going to be like the other ones, which really are just the old talk show. They have mics, they have cards, they have questions pot and liquor And no pre interview No, but I come from Johny Carson days. that's what I'm ye. And I used to have big fights because I would never do a pre interview Yeah, becausecause you're a big star you get away with it. I'm not very good at my job. so the idea of having to tell a story once and then two nights later I have to Be funny and tell it again was I wasn't very good at it. It's really hard to do. And of course in those days Also like the way the shows were, they thought of themselves, I'm sure as politically Correct, but like They just wanted to have the hot actress in the short skirt You know, I mean, you to this day, I know all these, you know, super woke people, but like they all the actresses right to this very day. I'm talking about, you know, the main late night shows, Colbert. they and they either it's either tits or legs, but it's a lot of skin. and a lot of flirting A lot of flirting. Which is gross because who would want to fuck those guys? I mean, me, I could see. Yeah ye. But not those guys. Yep. I with you I' right there. And I remember what was it Larry King, I think. Before I went on, they said, don't flirt with Larry Larry I I love Larry But so wasn't that a flirt? No.. Well, he was married eight times. I know. Um and I knew Larry very well we weren't flirting. Oh remember he kissed Brando that time O that time Brando kissed us? Yes. What the fuck was that about rand I know a little bit about him. Weirdo, right? Because my husband was older than I was and in the business My first husband And whose name you retain Yeah Well it seemed kind of weird to when you're famous to change your name, your last name. I know. Ka or something. Yeah, Brendo kissed Larry K. Yeah he did I guess he was just he was boy. What a genius, but I know what a character, you know, character, yeah. I'm friends and a lot practical jokes. He was a friend of my husband. so I was around when pull some very, very your kids. You met Brenda? Yeah. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah. He was great. Well He was great, but I' just one thing that is I think funny. It was funny at the time He was one My husband's second wife, Ursula Andres It was ye Was John Dererk's second wife? Yeah She just there's just never been a face like that ever. When she was coming out of the water in the James Bond. I know. You know? Yeah, when athletic Women weren't the style event. little you did a little coming out of the water yourself I think B had that in mind. You look like you still could. Oh thank you. No look Cre. incredible. Back to Brando, when he was writing his autobiography He actually called Ursula And he couldn't remember whether they had made love or not He knew they had dated n't remember he wanted her to verify whether it happened or not. That's in Streissan's book not the same idea, not the same people. She expect I don't know if you saw this, she had put out her bought biography a couple of years ago. It's like nine hundred pages, but it is worth it. I'm not just saying that because she's a good friend. It's just such's first of all it's so obviously her voice. Okay. You know, it's not like as told too. and she I know she talked to her many times as she was writing and she really cared about putting it down. And like her life is just amazing. I mean, there was not one guy who worked with her You know, for decades who didn't try to get with her? you know, from earliest times and the best story, Ariota, what you're saying is she there's a line in there. It's like a haaiku. It's like Did I sleep with Warren Baby? Maybe I think so I don't know. I'd have to think about it. You know, it was like she couldn't remember whether she literally had sex with the biggest letithario ever in Hollywood So What does that say about Cool I think that we're not young en. I think there must be a a point of no return where you have so many that you can't remember I guess Yes, that's part of it. certainly a guy like Marlon well, Marlon Brando too, who tried to get W Dice in. Didy. You didn't know that Oh yeah It's in her book I'm telling you everybody U and she's bewitching, I can see why. to Larry King We're starting on Larry King I used I loveved Larry. mostly when I knew him closely to him, he was married to the last wife, the Mormon Seaan still around. Sewn. Yeah, so we're not talking to shit about her. But I mean it was public record. But they, you know had many marital problems you know, when you would see them out together, it's this phenomenon that you were bringing up that You know, He's Larry, he's not a terrible looking guy, but, you know, he's not a lethhero like u, you know Some of your leading men, I'm sure. Tarzan was certainly some don't remember the movie well, but I remember thinking, wow, this guy has some great shampoo for a man who lives in the jungle. becausecause his hair was like fucking perfect. you know? I know. I know. I mean, he and Jane look like they met at Equinox. Yeah He definitely did But there's Larry and Sean was like a foot taller And model looking, you know, she yeah. And I can't say anything. My husband was thirty years older than I was So it's hard for me to judge. although I do, I shouldn't. C Yeah.' notothing wrong Because we learn. We grow and we learn. L Life is judging. Judging. I mean, you can be judgy, which I fucking hate. Judging. Yeah Jud what's the difference? Well, judging is judging is making a choice about your settled opinion on any issue that's okay to do. You know, there are some examples that would be obvious. A we are we judging pedophilia? Yes. we're saying I make the judgment that this is wrong. But judge you meaning about everything? Well, most things I mean I mean, you seem to feel a little guilty about this and I'm saying you shouldn't because All we're saying is humans Well, humans will human. They're just gonna do the human things. Yes, they are. And with men Look, I'm seventy never got married We don't need to go into why that is, but let's just say water rolls downhill That's my view. which is and for men, downhill is You know, it's like sex, the urge to be, you know, that The water's always going to roll downhill. Okay To that. Yes, Yes. With most heterosexual men. and certainly with gay m. just our animal behavior. Right I mean Well, if you know you know animals, you love animals, you know how boy You know the drive the animal drives very strong. We pretend it isn't in humans, but it is. you know We both I'm a PetA board member. I know onene thing I do know about you is you love horses and care for them U we have a mutual enemy Uually people say, I have a mutual friend. Yeah, you know, when you're with me, I got a lot of beefs. I didn't try to start any of them. They're all wrong. But yeah, Liam Neeson is I had a public feud with him Have I? No, no I'm just saying, but I know you love horses, so I know you're going to be on my side His side is he's pro the horses in Central Park. And yeah. That's horri Yeah, I judge that I judge that is horrible. Yes Now could it be done could touristic rides on those horses in a humane way with animals? with horses? No. You don't think so at all. They should not ever be. Well, certainly not not stoned. and shitting in a bucket and like so they they're so spirit is broken as they stand all day Outside of the hotel. I used to stay at the hotel cross from Central Park. It's stunk of horssehit. No It's terrible. They shouldn't be on the street. Yeah. They should be only in the park They should give that backfield. For them to have turn out. I've been through this with people. That back field with turnurnout and staples, proper living arrangements. That's what you have for you have horses? I do. I do. I have two. . I used to have a lot. Where we differ I would think, because I know I've come up against Peta on issues is horse racing I imagine you don't care for that either. I don't. Yeah. they and they're recently talked to Innggrid Newkirk, the head of Peter about it. and she said, It's circling the drain They've gotten it stopped in a lot of places hor racing. Yeah Do you think it's? I don't think may Be because of Peta. Yeah it is They're they're really good at lobying support. Who else would it be? Who else gives it shit It's a lot of things. I I was a racing commissioner here in California for seven years. whyy do you think it's not bad for the horse? You think the horse is okay with it? I think at a certain level, yes, I think in California, it's okay. if we're going to use horses at all I mean, they often break their legs. And then they have to be put down In the old days, yes, and in certain states and certain jurisdictions. But u That's why when Arnold Swarzenegger, when he was governor, he asked if I would be a commissioner And he wanted me to look after the horses. And I think You could argue that while I was there, we chang some rules that really made a difference. Oh Well, that's good. But you're not gonna to bid. It's. But you know, we don't have to have beef. I don't I don't want to have beef with anybody. Disagreements are fine. I know, but it was a great opportunity to learn about the industry make some real changes. There's a story that makes sense to this. I went to party, a friend of mine He's a great guy. I love him and he's become very successful and now' a beautiful house very near here This is like fifteen years ago. He was living in an apartment, but he wanted to have this sort of lavish you know, exotic different kind of party This is in an apartment. I walk in and there's a camel in the lobby of the building And I go up and so it wass like, yeah, some sort of animal themed or you know. And then outside, you you in an apartment and then like out on the patio is a fucking tiger No no, no. As a PEA person, I was just getting more and more and there was room full A listers. And I knew some of them were like sympathetic to the cause. I was saying, we got to tell Michael, you can't have a. Okay, this is just not right. And finally a few of us go up and convince him. and Arnoldd Trump Swarineer walks in and goes, I want to see the tiger 's good. Yes. No, I worked with Dippy Hedrren. We went to DC and everything on that. The birds A you that tippy Edrin? Yeah. Yeah But you know, she gave up career frit various reasons But one was to help endangered animals And especially wild animals being pets She really fought that. She probably felt guilty about how much they had to fucking torture birds to get that. It was later when she did a movie called Roar No With some wildcats. One of them took Melanie, who was a little girl actress in the movie took her forehead off in the movie. Yeah in the movie she in the movie whileile they were shooting it It actually happened. But Tppy learned by working with the animals. She thought she loved them. She had One or two as pets But she learned in the process that this is not right. And wild animals belong in the wild. They do. Did you ever work with them? Oh, Tarzan, you must have the chimp Everything was trying to kill me on that movie. All the time. Where was that shot That was Sri Lanka Sri La Afica where the elephants are, you say., of course Sri Lanka You can ship in the lions, you can ship in the orangue and the cheetah, but you can't move elephants. For those who are geographically stunted, Sri Lanka is off the coast of India. It used to be Ceylan. And then it became Sri Lanka Um And it is mostly Hindu, right Its' yes. It's a war torn island Christian there's different factions. Yeah. Yeah, they Yes Yeah That's the world out there. We're in here. I know. We drink. Do you drink not anymore No it doesn't make me more clever, it turns out. Oh I know it does you. And I'm enjoying the Oh yeah, you thought you smoke No. Oh, But I used to smoke pot smke because kid and just to one of the cool things about tenen was the pot smoker. Yeah You know, I mean, it was nineteen eighty, right Yeah. and in nineteen eighty, that wasn't like I mean, you saw Cich Chin Jang did it, but it was like It just was I watched it again fairly recently And I gota say it holds up I think it does It absolutely does. Now there' some things like there's literally nothing you can look at fromr even twenty years ago, that is't have something that you go, Oh, we wouldn't do that today You know, Yeah. So but that Oh, sure, sure. Yeah I mean, like he says the he's the, you know, Dudley Moore'. writing partner is gay. Yes, whichich that itself wasn't done a hell of a lot. It wasn't. But generally it does hold up. I mean, it does have a a sexist slant Because he's it's a man who's having a midlife crisis and is lusting after that's what the water story is about. Of course. Yeah water rolls downhill. He cannot help himself. C cannot help it. I mean, that's what's so funny. And what I when I saw it, I hadn't seen it since it came out, I don't think. and when I saw it couple of years ago, it was like But forgot that it was such a comedy that they play, I mean, there's just a lot of broad comedy, the be face and rolling down the hill. Yeah. And the hot sand on his feet which is so gorny Yes,or And you don't even speak until like the third reel. No,ardly in the movie. But then well, but you are. But when another thing I for all those ears you are actually quite good when you do open your mouth. It's a great performance. Thank you. Yeah.. It was written. And I'm working with Blake Edwards. Right. Oh, of course If he says you did a good job, you did a good job. Right And just go home and feel good about it This summer, Prime V videoideo takes you back before legally blonde, before law school, and into the world of Elle Woods in high school. Set in nineteen ninety five, this Gemini vegetarian knows exactly who she is until her family moves from Belair to Seattle. Packed with iconic fashion, nineties nostalgia, and a throwback soundtrack, Elle proves one thing Law school was hard. High school was harder. From the world of legally blonde, watch L, a new original series only on Prime videoide. Watch now. This episode is sponsored by Rula. 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That's R U L A d. com slash random You deserve mental health carere that works with you, not against your budget Again, that's rula dot com slash random R ULA dot com slash random No, I remember there was a movie star I wouldn't say who up who his buddies with at the time I worked with him In the eighties and Let's just say this movie star was a guy's guy. And he was Blake he said was kind of a guy's guy. I mean, I when I saw knowing that from all those years ago when I resaw Ten, it kind of figured in my mind that o Blake is kind of a You know, this guy said he was a dog. You know, I don't knownteresting. I don't know if he was. I don't know either. Yeah. But very often those kind of guys married to the saintly Julie Andrews, you know 's a Dane. She's amazing. What is she? She's not certainly, she's fantastic. Really? She's fun. Well, you can be both. but she's truly The good qualities of a saint, right? Shes couldouldn't be nicer, right? Couldn't be nicer, but she can talk like a sailor the best of. Awesome. It's goodood to know, isn't it? Well remember then he put her in SOB and then she showed her tits? Yeah. Do you remember what a big thing that was? It was. Like Julie Andrews is showing her tits But no, it's a it's a it's a really does hold up and it's u in its broadly comic way, it really does get at that V universal thing that happens and I can only speak for the men, The midlife crisis or the, you know, is this the last time I'm going to be sort of like fuck attractive tool. you know, I mean, I have other things in life, but you know, you don't want to let go of that part of you. Yeah, you know? I mean, and Iperveric. You know? I mean, you still got it. And I know you It's funny because you said you were so much younger, right than Your first h But now you're younger, you're the younger. I mean the husband is now younger than you. Y. So you kind of like the poster person for the age doesn't matter It can go either way. It's just love love. I it's individual. you can't I ended up meeting a lot of young women who were with older men. No, I don't think I had anything in common with any of them. Really? But they thought we did just because of that one Right Aspect of my life, but u You know, I was seventeen and you think you know everything when you're sevventeen You were seventeen when you met John Derek And he was forties, right? Yeah. He was forty six and Yeah, I mean, look, I'm you talking the. It's a great age for a man. No. And I mean, this has been my whole life. Yeah. and he was going off to Europe And I used to feel Um cheish about it because people try to shame you about it And at some point I went You know what If everybody else gets to say I was born this way And this is my truth. And you know what I mean? All this, you know, if I were to come out as gay, they do That's your truth, th. That's what you like. because you were born that way. Well, I was born. you're that, you know, attracted to younger women It's just just physical There's a certain Jardiv viv that replaces The Jis of mine that got up and went you know In Ija And Vve. You know, I've always said that I have some friends that are like you and that didn't get married and they have girlfriends. They treat them well donon't get married, so they're my heroes Because we're not liars Yes,, but men want both and men lie Husbands lie and it's the It's being made a full love, it's the is seit. I feel very good about the choice I made. I feel I made a rare choice. It wasn't hard What is hard. It's hard to stay unmarried when you're successful chararming f as we all know, even though half the town is always beefing with me. I just ignore the hate mail, B. Fuck it. I can't believe you get all this. Oh crazy. Oh the wo hate me I get dont hate. They exactly. They just hate hate. It's an animating feature. of their life Yeah is to feel superior to people who are morally inferior because theyt agree with them one hundred percent on everything. So that means you are, of course, morally inferior And I just won't buy it. I don't go along and that's okay. The people who love me love my dirty draws They really do. They do anything for me. They literally say to me, than you for your service all the time when I'm out So people who hate me, you know, it's just like it just balances out. Yeah, you know, If I If I thought that the people who hate me ever like made an honest argument. They're the people who won't talk to me The conservatives who I don't vote with or agree on many things, they're always happy to talk. It's the woke people who are like because they're not really that bright or learned about what the things they're arguing about, so they don't want to argue with me 'cause they don't have They just I always say to them, just engage on the argument I'm making. Tell me that the argument I'm making is wrong. It's it's always your old or your, um You know, you're sexist. these are labels. What about the argument You know, I went to see Barbie when that was out and I tweeted about I hadn't tweeted in a long time when I got home and just to say that it's based on a false premise that we still have this ressive patriarchy in twenty twenty three. We don't. There are problems that remain, but it's not a patriarchy and I proved it because I looked up the board because there's a real Matel company. And I looked up their board, it's six I think it was six and six six men, six women in the movie, she barges into the Matel boardroom, and it's all men. Right. And it's the present day. So you're literally lying and saying, because we have the facts. Mattel is not all men. Why did Matel let them do that As a company It made a billion dollars. Like you don't think they sold what doll sales I guess it did, but I don't know. I don't know I never saw the follow up, but I can't imagine that it wouldn't Yeah Right? Barbie was like all anyone talked about in the summer of twenty twenty three Yeah Anyway, when I tweed this out, like Did anyone engage with that actual argument? No It's just, you know, Oh, Bill, you're flexing, you're this, you're that. you're old, you don't get it. You hate womaren. Just talk about what the argument, just in they will not because there is no argument. No Do I have you dead to write? There is a real Mattel boardroom That doesn't mean I'm saying there's no problem between the sexes.. But you know, they're also very uniform in their thinking, you know, they love this privilege concept and there is privilege for white people. Of course in this country. I mean, the legacy of This country is so horrible that Allite people are benefiting from stuff that happened years before. Doesn't mean we did it today. But you know, today's very different There's many kinds of privilege Pre prettyty privilege That's a thing. I know nothing about that. Yeah Well, I know a lot about it I mean, Ebody gets you First of all, you never have to buy a drink or a dinner. No, it is. It's been it's an embarrassment of riches My life Oh ye my life and because I had You know, two hundred years ago, my physique wouldn't have been in fashion and my My looks wouldn't have been in fashion. I'm born in the right time You don't think the way you look would have been in fashion to No. been skinny I would have been considered skinny and scrawnny and and not Rubinese cannot Um No there is fashion and beautify. there def there definitely is. I there is definitely a rubinesque thing I don't think that was two hundred years ago. I think there was a little before that. And anyime Um I think it was It was past the Middle Ages but early into the modern era. Maybe the sixteen hundreds is Peter Paul Rubin, but Anytime society is living in poverty. Extreme poverty being heavy Thank you. Gigantic Okay Yes. Yes, beinging a real pie wagon was just the most fashionable thing lookook at North Korea. likeike thiss one fat guy in the country, it's Kim Jong un. and everybody else is starving king has to be, you know, he that's he doesn't try to like stop that. That's the way to signal to the people, I'm regal, I'm royal. I'm different than you. You have kids No kids. Look at you. You and me, no kids. Maybe you didn't want them No, I thought I did just because you do. everyone says you' going to have kids and then when I think I hit about thirty two. I thought, o oh, I better start working on this and scheduling it I kept waiting married to John? Yeah, I kept waiting for my life to slow down. It never slowed down. And he didn't say, I want to put a baby in you No, he didn't want k. He'd had two kids. previous marriage And he was older so he'd done it. Yeah, he'd So that's perfect. So when I thought I wanted it, then I really started s down sitting down to scheduling and I thought I'm not mother material. My husband certainly isn' father material I mean, it was the most judgmental Odd ball and Derek Your husband Was it a judgmental odda? Well K of lived in a fantasy world and was very he was very tough on his children from his first marriage. and that didn't work out well because He was tough. Well In's run you say And then you look around it At least back then, I don't think so much now maybe, but B in the eighties Kids of famous people we're really struggling Npple brapies But then I think they were left home more No, Nepo baby. You've heard that term. Yeah. Yeah. Okaykay. any that's anybody who's And that doesn't mean that they can't be talented themselves. It know a big advantage. But I think they grew up with a chip on their shoulder, a lot of them Because they were left at home then. You know what? They weren't brought on the set. They didn't have the nannies where they were in their parents' alves so much. You're right. thingsings changed. Yeah. It was harder then Now it's great. All these kids are very happy. All the ones who are like twenty years old now, Johnny Depp's kid. I mean, everybody who's ever been to anybody from twenty years ago, their kid is now like interest and the kids are very happy with this. They don't want real jobs. I know. And it's okay. You know, I've heard at times this argument, you know, o, it's harder for it's not harder for you. It's not It's easier for you, especially now. they love Y babies are everywhere They really are. They are. And it's okay And, you know I was I couldn't wait to drive. I couldn't wait to get my first job to have my own money Me too. By potware? Yeah. I so you did smoke pot. I did. Oh good. I did when I was in high school. When you were filming that? I don't know if I really liked it As much as I liked the fact that I was hit and I was smoking When you film that in ten Yeah. Were you really smokking pot? No. No, there were some They brought some I don't know herbal something. Okay You made it look real It certainly was a great fantasy for me Well, you said your husband Fantasy, you know, he lived in this and then he he married the fantasy girl He married a girl who like It's so funny the way America like gets fixated. unlike one girl For like ten years you were like it'd happen them with Carmen Electra, Pamela Anderson. It's like for like a whole decade, there's like one pretty girl in the whole country. You were that girl You know, it' like turned out. It's just like No, nobody else and it's like, come on, isn't somebody else a little No. No. It's Carmon Electra again. That's it. And it was like That must have been I mean, obviously grratifying in one way kind of a burden in another. It was none of those things. It Like I say, not It was just It was just a whirlwind because I wasn't I had no aspirations to be in films I had when I did ten It was just a fluke that I got the part And I had no agent, no manager, no Nothing. No fantasies about being in the movies So it came at me so fast and turned my life around So I always felt I was kind of catching up Never stop to think I was just always uncomfortable with my image Being all over magazines when I walked down the street And I always felt kind of fake in an imposter. At the same time because I didn't work as an actress. I didn't or drive a limo or whatever everybody else did to be in movies It is so funny that many people they want it. They yearn for it so badly and it almost works against them. And there's something that reads I think about someone who actually doesn't care if I get this part It's just like in a relationship, you know, if you have that like, you know, I could go out with air right, you know It's not gonna kill me if I don't, you know as opposed to the thirsty guy who's never attractive to a woman. I mean, a woman is always going to think, well, If he's too good for me, he must be awesome, you know. And it's kind of the same in the business, you know, it's like If she really doesn't care, I mean, it's genuine. they just they just feel it. It's like Wow, she's too good for us. We want her. Well, it was that way when I went on my interview with Blake You know, I just came in and it was just a fluke. a girlfriend said He's looking for this girl and he wants to meet you because my husband had a reputation for having beautiful women in his life Arsula Andrew. Yeah. Linda Evvent That was his third wife. And who was that again? Dynasty Oh, of course the block. Big valley. Wait, he got with her too. How was his third wife? Oh, fuck Yeah. Third wife before you. You were the fourth wife. I was the fourth. bought this house from someone who who wife was part of a fifth Wives club There was a fifth Wives Club out here Hint M. We wouldn't say exactly what part of Los Angeles this is in but a nice Let's just say, a nice one that didn't burn down Last year. Okay. Okay In that neighborhood. yeah And they were all like, well, I'll just say, they're all Beverly Hills house wases and You know The fact that there was Iays something about this business, The fact that there was enough of them to have a club I know O And they were all. And they liked to get together? Yes It was a club And they were all happy Like it took this fucker four cararriages to figure it out. And now they were obviously older in life No wait, these are women who were individually the number five or was this from the same man No, not the same man. Oh, okay, that's what I thought. The differentere sort of Hollywood types and moguls and who married five times is the kind of guy who just They just get married. they just They do and There's another thing that I think happens to is a guy can come on real strong Sweep a young woman off her feet. R Promise of the mooon then because of his privilege in life, he might water might run down ill And he starts looking somewhere else. And I think that You know, certain men who have a certain affluence have more opportunities. Of course to do this. Of course You're not going to have Yeah a guy who really works hard for a living with five wives. No, no Well telling you it's a Beverly Hills club And they were all happy It's that's what she told me. likeike they were like it was a The guy had finally settled that. It just Oh, they were the last one. The fifth. Yes. So that happens too Pysically. happened with my father What do you mean? My father was kind of was quite a rake And he finally, we all thought, because I'm one of four kids, we thought he'd found the love of his life finally And later on in life, he said, No, you don't understand. I just The drive was gone. That's the thing. Yeah It's I mean Anthony Quinn had a baby out of wedlock at eighty. I know. I know so you know. I know I was doing a film with him. I was around that. I always thought that I know I was there for the whole drama with his wife and everything. poor wife must be like, eighty. How old does his motherfuck have to get before I It was so worrying about him going out on me So dramatic. ye You know, as you get older, you realize life is basically one Long exercise in saving time You buy things on subscription, you order groceries You take calls in the car Biggest time is the one thing nobody has enough of And if you run a business Hiring can eat up more time than almost anything. 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Anytime I have sex, I just feel like it has to be like I just got out of prison or else I't want to do You know what I mean? find out ye. I mean, I don't know if it's not it's not the kind of thing Either should do either you should be very passionate or just don't do it likeike If you used to do it twenty one times a week You know, that's not going to happen, but make the times that you do do it. As good as when it used to it. likeike that, you know, that Toby Keith song I ain't as good as I once was. Right. But I'm as good once as I ever was. Yes.et Toby Oh, you know him? Yeah. w. He had raceorsces Well G sources, good ones. I only discovered his music Recently, I think when he died, I was like, oh, you know, I used to make fun of this guy back in two thousand three with the Iraq War and he had that song aboutory songs. Put a boot in your ass and we made fun And I was like, but I never really gave him a chance. And then I listened to I got his like greatest hits. I was like, wow, this guy was talented and he has some amazingly great songs. And I don't even I kind of like the boot and the ass one now And now you do Well, I wasn't for the Iraq war. Yeah. So that was, you know, I didn't think of the right war to fight. I like it more for the one we're in now, but we don't want to get into that And by the way, in my life I'll just share this with you There is nothing and I mean that very literally, nothing more compelling that I've ever experienced then Beautiful woman who's also great to talk to. You know, that's like That's like everything is about those. Yeah Yeah. ye. Yeah, yeah. But it's my favorite thing I I'm just lucky to be around some really intelligent people that I call friends and I love nothing more than sitting and talking to them. My best friend is ition politicians Fascinating, just fascinating And sh that br me along. Who is Yeah, Ivan Baki. brrings me along. Who is her position? Ambassador to the US from Ecuador. She's Lebanyese. Oh, she's from Ecuador. Very, very complicated. How did you become friends with her? In Washington. I was there to work on the horse slaughter bill to po slaughter in the country And yes, I do want to stop the slught. Yeah, me too. And that's been a twenty five year shit. Well, I mean, it's ridiculous. You me and Peter then are on the same page there. So let's just be friends on that one. Oh, no, we are friends. Yeah. Of course we are. Well, I'm gonna talk. I just I'll tell you what I like like Pragmatic Solution. Me too. There's a great program that my girlfriend let me be part of in the Galapagos Islands. Do you know blue Bonds Bue bo Blue bonds. So there's a way bonds, BON BON DS. financial bonds. Blue bonds. Yeah. bonds. Sure. And good bond. For Ecuador to banned their marine preserve twenty three square miles twenty three. twenty three thousand square mes. I can't remember. Anyway, it was a huge expansion over fifty percent of their Marine preserve There was Credits was set up a blue bond for investment, and it was a debt swap. So they got billion and a half off their debt that they owed for making this marine expansion So I like the idea of monetizing. It's too easy for us In a market, we've destroyed our coral reefs and our oceans and now we're going to say, now you at the Galapagos because it's an international treasure, you can't fish in it, you can't do this. We want you to not do anything to hurt treasure also helped start this incredible super highighway for whales and that why the Galapagos is so sacred to Nature lovers because it's where Darwin I know. You know, that's the whole thing with the Galopolos, Ecuador, which is on the west coast of South America North of Chile for again, the geographically challenged. I know some of them are out thereh. This is where Darwin went to study what became the theory of evolution. So it is a sacred place to people who actually like science. also belongs to Ecuador And we expect them not to put hotels and resorts. I see what you're saying So we got to give them something Yeah, I think you could do both. I think that's one where you could do both. But we have to. And that's what we did with Bue bonds.. They got a billion and a half off their de their debt. Right. Oh good. Yeah. it's a great program. And now it's going all over Because a hotel, you know, do it right and just don't kill the turtles when you build it You know, But there's no reason why you would kill the turtles. You could build a hotel without killing the turtles I feel like that is the essence of pragmatism in politics, right? But this might be the one place left where they won't ever have a hotel. And that would be fine with me too And we might want to keep one. But we have to give them something. or build it twenty miles away Yeah, they have. So you have to take a six hundred miles Shuttle bus there. Yeah, there's six hundred miles offshore. I went went to the Hearst Castle. I thought you could drive up right up to it No, you get a fucking bus and it's like another forty five minutes. Do you ever go to the Heurst Castle? I swim in the pool Oh folks. I know. Oh you're one of those people. It's good to be me. I was qu to got every in my life still I haven't made a major motion picture in a hundred years. Still doors open for me. You made the right choice there, by the way You are not missing anything What do you mean? Not making movies No, I don't m missing anything. I don't miss You really are It's it's I was an actor in the eighties when I was sort of comic, but you I saw your b. Comics become actors When we think that's it was never supposed to be my path, but you know, you're young and it's fun and you know, you do some silly movies. It sucks. I mean, it's just too many hours it's just it's just when you're doing a movie, all you do is the movie It just totally takes over your life, right? Yes, and you sit around all day. You sit around. and it's such a Yeah. It's such a mystery when it's going to work Complete miss. Yes I don't care how much talent you have put in a above the line. It is an absolute. There's so many rooll of the dice. Totally. There's so many things that can fuck up a movie Eediting You know, or you can get on the set and the actors don't like each other Or one wants to do That happens. One wants to do fifty takes and one wants to do one. I know. What do you do then You know, what are you doing when the chimp wants another tpe in Tarza I'm going callught Yes. No, it's very complicated. And you know, my husband, John Corbett is a I think a great actor and a comedic actor. I love him. And I love him and everything he does. E you know he does. I've never seen him like as the You know what he was I think the lead in that movie with u Pop movie with Canner Reeves He was in that y. So great. Stre Kings. Oh my God, is that a great movie. He loved He's terrific in that No, I mean, I've seen him in a million things. He seems like another one of those guys who you just like because again, it doesn't look like it's that important Like he'. There's not just there's not this like super intensity that's like Okay, just, you know, this, I'm just here for entertainment. I'm just it's the end of the day And I want to watch something entertaining that grabs me and like let's not pretend that this is curing cancer. you know? Yeah, That's a big disease out here. There's something great and that I respect so much having been in the business. of a really good working actor having been only a a movie star for kind of no reason. And the pressures are so different as against having a life, showing up, doing great work, making everybody happy, going home and not it consuming to you and that's what he is That's awesome You probably wouldn't get along if he wasn't I don't No, and think I think he could normally never be with someone who's an actress. Because of the competition, the why are you still on the set You're going to be gone for eight weeks. That's why I I get it all. When I was young and like you know, dating as much as I could. When I first moved out here, late twenties, thirties, I early on stopped going out with actresses for that very reason, like you'd have a date and they'd cancel it because they got an audition the next day It was like they weren't lying. They weren't trying to get out of it. It's like that they were blowing me off. They just really had an audition. and that was what's important to them. And I was great, but then I was like, no, And they're and they're a little crazy You know, I mean, they' there's they're high strung. I mean, there's a reason why actors like to stay in a state of emotional turmoil, which is not great for your real life as a you, as a human being. But it's great when you're on this set because you have You have all this that's stirring around in your gut, right So that when firing emotionally on anything. So even though the scene is about how, you know, you had sex with the monkey, you know, when you were a child, you know, it doesn't not something you really did, but you can channel into because that's what an acting class teach do. No, it's and you use that You know I mean, I remember Was I still acting when my You know when I Yes, my father died And I remember it's kind of selfish, but you know, how can you help the thoughts that go into your mind? I remember thinking like right after he died, o, this would be a good time to have an audition for a really serious part Pickers I could cry like so I mean, All I can do is stop crying. Yeah. for the you know the few weeks after he died and then my mother the same thing. Well, it's funny like I remember I For both of them, it was like And I think it speaks to the fact that I was fortunate and had great parents and notot anything too unresolved that I was, you know, very chuckked up at the funeral You know, I was supposed to speak, I did speak, but it was very hard to talk with the, you know, the lump in your throat So Good, That's how it should be And then there was like a month after that when I was home and I'd just be doing whatever have to do. I had to go back to work and I'm reading and writing, or whatever it is. And like suddenly, I would just like And I remember thinking, I'm so glad I live alone Be I'd be so embarrassed if someone was here and they just saw me suddenly started. And I'd do that for like a few minutes and go back to work And that lasted for about a month And then I was done Not that I don't, you know, love them, but like That's the course of nature Yeah They wereious They were never supposed to be there forever What's tragic is when someone predeceases The parent That's tragic And that'll break you. You know, when someone dies too young. Well, I when it's your kid. Yeah, Oh no I can't. Because you're supposed to die before. I don't know how people go on sometimes. Right. Some of the circumstances. Not something we'll have to faith. Another good reason This my doggies That a good reason for us doing what we're doing, man And we're helping the planet You know what another thing I thought of when I was thinking about having a kid You'll get this, but other people don't. Um, I thought Now, I'm thinking about all these different you know, making a little stim my mind about pros cons having a kid. I think I spend more time When I decide to have a dog, a new dog, that most people do when they have a kid Me too And I'm at that place now. Yeah My dog a b booyys had two One died in August? Oh no. Puerto Chico had gotten to that point where he's just he couldn't breathe So I had to bring in the needle because dogs just don't die because in nature they'd be dead years before. Once they lose a step, you're dead in nature But the other dogs will kill him too. Right. Any will kill him. That is life is partly grief And we all know that And it's what I started to say to you when I sat down here, the fact that I'm seventy And I'm here with you today. and I feel fine. you know, we don't take that for granted our age. We the way we did when we when we were young I never even thought about You know. And when I got Sick, meaning cold flu, which I got way more when I was younger. Yeah, me too Because we were stupid and we lived worse. At least I did. I drank, I didn't eat the right food, didn't get sleep. Yeah. all that shit But when I got sick, It never entered my mind. Oh, this could turn into something bad Now I get a hangnaail, I'm like, this is that the first sign of Carkins's disease. And we go to the doctor every year for our blood tests and our checkups. Well you don't? Are you kidding I used to have one doctor name in my You know, at the time, Rolodex Probably Now I have like a hundred, you know, like I mean, that's part of it is because doctors are big fans of mine. and like when everyone comes up to me and it's like, o, I'm the I'm the best at. Yeah. You are my new best friend. You know what? You I know. dont I don't say this to every mother fuck comes up to me, but you, my friend, are in my phone now. I know. And it's great Who doesn't want a fan working on you Yeah, you don't want tona be a number or just a name on a file I remember when Reagan got shot, which was the almost the same maybe the year after en came out and his big quip, which was great. He was funny, you know. He said something about to Nancy like, Make sure the doctor' are Republican. You know. That' so good. Its so good. And honey, I didn't duck or something too. Yes. Honey, I forgot to dark. Yeah, that's right Yeah, that's the first time I knew that it was him and not his writers and being prepped, I just wasn't sure until then. Well, Gorvido once said The biggest myth about Ronald Reagan was that he wasn't a good actor because they made fun of him. He was not a successful actor. He had a little run You know, he also made the right choice. I thought. he got out when the getting out was good. you know? there are a precious few Uh even less with women who can endure into their fifties and sixties. And then you have to just be iconic to be working in your seventies and eighties. We're talking about Robert De Niro, Harrison Ford Kevin Costner, yes, if you were So big, your iconic, Mel Gibson, you can work, but you're playing bad grandpa And there are only a handful of them anyway. Not a lot. Right. Michael Douglas. and with Ronald Reagan, he was in the studio system. You didn't choose your parts We take our good fortune really for granted, I say we, I mean, as a society, as people, especially as kids today who I don't think are well educated. I don't think they realize how recently in history How much harder life was You know, it was really tooth and claw, especially for a woman. I mean, there was no women's rights at all. And even in the my mom had a tough time What was her situation? Well born in the deepression. In the depression. And where? In southern Illinois And were a single mother U And so life was tough. single But she worked really hard My mom And her mom worked her whole life. My grandmother was a single mother That It was rare. In the twenties, and she told me how rare it was She told me when she she drove, she had to. She had to my mother was really raised by the grandparents in New York. because my grandmother had to be on Long Island. That's where her job was. And she said she When she was driving a car in the twenties men would yell at her from other cards what? Like you shouldn't be driving. Oh no Ely Right Exactly. I didn't know they couldn't drive. like Well, driving was fairly new Yeah. And the idea women only got the vote. I know That's right. So we're they couldn't get a credit card til what? sixties seventies? Really On their own. without a man signing their credit card? I' never heard that Yeah Wait Come on. I think it's sixties. I really do Women couldn't get a credit card in. I believe, I believe What about that girl I bet you she could What about Mary Taller? She must have had Ed Asner signing her credit. That's Mary. That's Mary Taller M. Marlow Thomas is Danny Thomas. And you're right. I bet you Marlowe Thomas couldn't get a credit card when she was eighteen. Sheed Danny Thomas. Probably. That's to the point that, you know, Modernity is really modern It's really new It really is But just a hot shower was a rarity a hundred years ago So yeah, I read that stuff all the time. You know But at the same time, I don't have a lot of faith in Mainly But we are getting better. I'm saying society For all of us You know who did that? The pragmatists, the people, the centrists, the plotters, the people, the policy wonks, Hillary Clinton is one of these type of people. The people who just They're really not that far on either extreme. They just want to make a situation better. They're wonky about it, which you have to be. They're not the show ponies on either extreme. They don't on Twitter. they don't care about that There was a congressman He was always the best congressman. He was out here waxman He did so much to advanced like practical social agenda issues. We once asked him on the show. He was like, no, I'm busy I was like, I fucking love this guy I fucking everybody else is like run Thirsty. the microphone. Yeah really. They're gonna point a camera at me. I'm there. And this guy was like You can see them perform. Bad actors. I'm a congressman. I have a job. I'm going to do that. Thank you for the offer. But you know in your argument, you're leaving out capitalism. I love it And that's brought us out of poverty M than moreore than anything else. More than it. I'm always trying to lecture the children on this And I understand why they're frustrated with the economy. It It is a sucky kind of economy, especially in an expensive city like this How the fuck Could you live? When I moved here in nineteen eighty three My I'm from New York where my rent was fifty. I think it went up to three hundred and seventy five dollars. Now of course, this is nineteen eighty three. You were in Tarzan. I was on Westmount in West Hollywood. Okay, you were doing better than me. All right We know to dwell our m. But um You know, you could you could walk the streets of West Hollywood and just Look at the every other house had to signed rent for a rent You know, so there wasn't this Everybody's just trying Now to get an apartment, you have to like bribe the person Because there's so many people waiting to take that apartment and it strike. shoe box for like eight hundred a month would be the least you could. No inflation is. I don't know how these people live. No wonder they're all on only fans. I want to know how How so quickly Bill Clinton balance the budget Right ero. I remember the big rememember held that big sign with his zero on it Well because the we need that right now so we can start all over again and get a big inflation and then come back to zero. I mean at some point it's going this balloon has got to pop. It's thirty nine trillion. You know that our GDP For the first time now I think since World War twoo, or maybe ever, but our debt is higher than the GD We owe more than we make as a country. I mean, I don't know enough about it Economics to understand how that's all going to work out for us. It's not going to work out. But you know, Trump's view because he's, you know a shisttery businessman is that When you have a debt that big That's the debtor's problem. I mean, the person who holds the debt Because Yeah the lender. Yeah. because what are you going to do? We're your partner now? Oh you want to put us in jail? Well then you're really not going to get your money. Yeah. So we're going to pay back fifty cents on the dollar. That's he's actually said that out loud He really does. He's like that's how you do it. Yeah. And you know what he's not wrong It's not morally correct He's not wrong Like, if you have the choice between getting nothing and getting fifty cents on the dollar, I mean, when we had the crash in two thousand eight, I had a lot of my money in Lehman brothers. They were the first ones to go And there was like, oh, well, now there's a line of people who were in Lehman Brothers. And you know, depending on how much you had in or who you blew or whatever it was, we'll see how much money you get back on the dollar. It was not one hundred cents on the dollar. No. It was whatever we're gonna fucking give you on the dollar. And you just took it So that's the debt swap in Ecuador That's when they get. Yeah You buy bad debt. You buy bad debt I mean, this country is just so stupid and this state is so ridiculous. This state. Why are we here 'causeuse the sun is so beautiful. 'a of the sun You know, where I live out in the country, it's just stunning. It's stunning here. It's stunning everywhere It's just stunning. It's like you, lucky from nature. Yeah. You know, just a freak of nature, this place. There's no other place you can name that's one hour away from The ocean The mountains, the desert. You can be in palm springs, you can be in a big bear, you can be swimming in the Pacific. You'll get a disease because it's polluted, but you could do it. I mean, it's just an amazing place. And the problem is that The sun here is like what oil? is to oil producing countries, especially third worldld ones like Ecuador Um It's it seduces you You don't have to do anything else for the people when you have oil. What the cartels have done to these countries to their economies, to their corruption T their quality of life, to the kids young men having to be in gangs It happens so fast now There is a machine that comes into a country And within a few years, it's already changing Well it's very sad I'm sorry, it's all because we want to get high Here Basically And And your point is And my point is when the buying stock maybe this well black market corruption Violence will stop I want Yes. I want drugs to be decriminalized. I do. I wanted to decriminalized to. D't we learn anything in the prorohibition? On this show, I want that to happen. Prohibition created the mafia. Of course. Oh no. We learn nothing. I know, but because there's money in it, honey. That's why. I mean, there's so much money in keeping it illegal And do you think the li? Why is a congressman from Sacramento wanting to keep drugs eg Because he's lobbied by the people who want to keep it illegal. becausecause he takes money from the liquor industry. Do you think the liquor industry wants the competition from this If only people would understand, you can use them together and it's fantastic. You don't have to be fighting. but no, mean Anything, I mean, why did everybody have? Now this isn't making sense to me. Why did everybody have to get a COVID shot even people with natural immunity. Natural immunity, which we always used to respect But in COVID, no, just get our product in you. And I'm not an anti vaxer. I'm just somebody who wants to decide which ones I want Yeah, if they had never, I remember the build upp to that, it's coming, it's coming, it's coming And I think if they had just left it, here it is, this vaccine It's available to anybody who wants it. I think probably more people would have taken it But when you tell Americans, you must, a But even more that bugs me is the natural immunity thing. I mean, for the people who are like, where're the science people? Well, there was nothing that was more settled science. than natural immunity is the best. So if somebody has natural immunity If they got this. I know a lot of people who got it like they were like, oh, you know what? I got sick in like November of twenty nineteen. I bet that was COVID. Yeah, I bet it was I bet it was and You could test it. Okaykay Doesn't matter our shit in you. That's when I go, okay Now the fix is in Now you're telegraphing that you just want to get your product in me as much as you can. And you know what? there are things that could come along. There's this Honta virus now where I want your product in me I want to dec You want to decide I want to decide when I want your product in me. I say that about sex toys also. I want to decide Yes Yes, for sure. I've never used a store I mean, I feel like if you have to use something, no judgment here I told you before, B. We gotta judge. I don't, I can't know Yeah No no I'm saying We can judge, we can't be judgy. Now you ever married twice Both seem I mean, you were married to John at the end, right? Yeah So it wasn't a divorce. that was No, it was still he died Suddenly, off what? aortic dissection What's that? That's where your aorta ruptures and runs like a Oh like what's his name? The other the actor, the great. That's what Alan Flick tried know. Did he? Yes, he was a very good friend of mine and he was sixty nine years old and he was playing hockey with his kid His eighteen year old who's from thed the third wives cllub U And I know Yeahah, I think they married. and she And he just suddenly And the heart just it ripped apart. Yeah. And you know, in a way, if you have to go That's not the worst way because you you're right to the moment you die, you're living your best life. He was hockey, He was Canadian, doing the thing he loved with his eighteen year old kid who he loved. And then suddenly and there was like, I remember the kid telling me. They took him into the room and they look and it was like, there's nothing left. I mean, we could not put this back together And this was set in motion from the day he was born like a genetic defect or something flw was in there from the beginning and it was just going to take be a number of years. it was gonna to take and then it was going It's going to happen. Yeah, and ironically he used to whenever we'd see a movie or a TV show and the guy would grab his chest and say, I think I'm having a heart attack and dropped dead He always said, lucky son of a bitch So it was weird that that's the way he went As a lucky son of a bitch, it gave me some peace that he went that way. He wasn't going to get old. He didn't like it. The idea of getting No one likes it. No Wen comes around Fast. I mean, fast and also I've heard people say Yeah, I don't want to be seventy five. Yeah, Wh are youre seventy four J I mean, if it's one thing about humans, we want more We want more life Especially if our lives are good. Yeah. our lives are good. We're lucky. We're very lucky I still riding horses. I don't know how long I will be riding horses. Right.s That's my basketball. But ye I still play basketball every day, but I don't know how long. I don't know how long it's Right now it's still great. And I'm in a hurry to get all I can out of it right now You're in a hurry. I'm in a hurry to write as much as I can Travel tra You know, you sit in an airport and you see I can't travel P I fly private, right Even that I can't do I'm just it just care What do you mean you can't? It's just too much. I did it for I was on the road for my whole life. It's a stand up comic everyvery other weekend I was out, you know, dragging myself out of bed after a full week working on my show and I loved it and I went into a Cincinnati or Kansas City or wherever. and it was but I just, you know, you just know when it's open And I just I under I like waking up every day here in California with all its flaws. Because as I was saying, the sun's like the oil. it seduces you into accepting almost anything And it does. I mean, I lived in New York. I grew up on the east coast Um, the idea that There are Almost no bad weather days here. I mean, there's rain, which we need and I actually like ret much confined to one season. U It's No matter how hot it gets in a day Usually cool at night whichich is awesome. as opped to the muggy east coast. Yeah Um Sun is just partart of what we need to survive It gets demonized The sun Cholesterol, you know, they love to demonize these things. it's like, no, you need cholesterol You need son You need some sun to convert vitamin D and it feels good. So don't overdo it You know, I remember living in the east Coast, gray days I was born here.' Cornia,oun Calornia. So, you are.. You were born in. sur first sailor You're a surfer and a sailor I was, I don't do it anyore A sailor My father worked for a sailboat company. and a surfer Now, I was a lucky kid. A very lucky kid. I'm a lucky guy to just have gotten to talk to you. I could not tell you how thrilled I was when I heard. I said, Really she's gonna do this show because I never see you do anything No. not you're never promoting it. And you don't need to No, I'm loving my life. I know. I don't need to go back to. That's the coolest thing in the world you can be It' it's very strange. People don't understand it because It's something that so many people anyway You know, that expression, they would kill to do it be famous to be in movies. And Not for some of us I know one person in the world who has no hopes and dreams, no ambitions, and is the happiest person I know because everybody else is sort of tied to this Well, if I just make my hopes and dreams come true, and very often they don't, or they're not as you dream them, it's very rare that your hope and dream comes And if you're just like, no, I'm just gonna skip that part and go right to being happy Yeah. I get the thing that's going to so and so make me happy. I love retirement and go right me time. I'm so happy in retirement. Who was it? It was on your show, I think, Galloway. Yes, Scott Galloway I think he was talking about ye. the bullshit Of course. O do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life. No, do what you're good at and then You'll make a good living and you can do what you want. And you live in Santa Barbara now and North of Santa Barbara. But I've been there since eighty one Well, someday, you and I should be in the middle with our significant others I'll meet you halfway What's what What's halfway? we'll have dinner, I hope. Yeah U, what's halfway Yeah. something Santa Barbara For all the great restaurants Santa Barbara. How aboutout Santa Bara? went toant ever go to Santa Barbara? Of course. I went to Salvago's Christas week What? It's funny So' so funny. Christmasy around there, you know. Christmasy, It's a Christmas town. I know. It's a solving It's sunny Valley. It's the Danish capital of the United States