Public Perception and Being Yourself

Huszy! Her views are Bzy. She's more than you might think. She's the castle and her name is Ashley. We love our friend Hzy ire today. Not gonna lie Why? I'll step up whenever anyone talks about. Boy, Is that real real?? That's not real. Do you want u I swear. You want some caffeine from my strawberry watermelon refresher? No, you got anything non caffeinated Well you're in luck This is a spriteberry blast. Well, why don't she hand it over to your boy? Becauseuse you know what? But I do think you should I think everything's gonna work out great after we drink these I'm just gonna put all these to the side. I'm gonna do what? I'm just gonna put them on the side. You can offer her one or something, but I'm not gonna force her. We cant offer her the sp berry glass. these are big theseese are big beds. Okay. Let's put tell you like a tidy kitchen when people come over. I just like my. I do. Yeah. I know, Chack. You prepare that way too. I've seen you. I know. I do. That's why I'm getting upset. I don't that house. She's here. We're not opening. Do cartw Hey! She invented a style of sayings that was so characteristic that it became like a meme. And then I got my sother for it. She entered very young on this like mega pop star trajectory and then it was like She could draw you perfectly. M, this is a brandnder skcape for me. it might be my sunset pain People say this to me all the time. they sayays, shouldh I call you Dick or Dave? And I always so should we call you Dick? Should Halsey or Ashley? Ash? Ash. How do you call me? I call you Ash. Yeah. I like Ash. I prefer it. Really? Yeah. Ash. Yeah. Does Ashley make you feel like you're in trouble? Yes. Yeah. That's exactly right. Yeah. I always feel like my mom is being like, Ashley G get downstairs. Do you have sisters? No, twow little brothers. Oh, yeah, I'm the oldest. Ash, I was gonna offer you a drink, but you're holding this was it a tea? We can still offer. If you won', we got drinks from the McCfe, from McDonalds No, I'm okay. If I drink more than this, then I'm going to spend the whole time You can split do? Yeah Oh yeah. bigig time peer? Yeah. How long have you known Ash eleven years. They're like old I met you through Benny back day. It was a friends Keep Secrets partarty And Fanny, it was after the IHart Radio Awards And the place you guys were going do it fell through And I was at Benny's first session and he was like we're gonna to his party and He was on the phone, He was like theen filter, blah, blah, I was like, Ohh, that's crazy. I just got the keys today. Oh my God. to like my new house in Beachwood Canyon I was like, I have to say huge. I remember this now. I remember. It was your house completely. Oh my God, we through that nastivey. There's no furniture, like nothing. It was unbelievable. It got broken up by The police came. Also, I was really stressed out because I got like, Im about to docs everybody right now. I do. He like Katie Perry there, Charlie was there, Wes was DJ. L Charlie, XX was there Yeah and Pth Harmony, Sn Mendez were everyone from the award show. I wasn't at the award show. I still was there. You were there? I only remember two things about that night and I can tell you the two things. I remember. There are a lot of things I remember number one Oh, I know you're going to say. No, you don't. I think I do. Say it. Bathroom Never mind. That was't was different. That was ae. Chuck, different party. I know what you're talking about. I'll say that one right after. First thing, Chuck, we're sitting by the DJ booth and it's like the party's like rocking. It was the first time I ever saw someone famous acknowledge your music publicly. in person with me. And it was Sean Mendez. I was really stressed out because the police come And they're like, and I'm And they're like, we won't talk to the owner of the house. and I'm like, well, I guess that's me because I just bought a house. Its like I decided to talk to the police and they're like, you gotta shut this down. I'm like, no, you don't. Yeah And' like, yeah, we do And I was like, why I was like, they were like, because you're breaking the law? I was like, what law am I breaking And they were like, you're breaking the law. I was like, No we're not. I don't know what happened. me I switched on Yeah I was like We're operating within the legal sound decibel limit. I was like, we're not exceeding fire code. There's no cars parked on the street. I was like, and I haven't exceeded the like amount of people who like this. Wow. And they were like, we well, and I was like, what law am I breaking? And they were like, the law Common sense I was like, that's not a real lock See later officers. I start walking away. Miley Cyrus is running out the door. She had like a bag of postmates in her hand. she's like, gott to go girl, gott to go.. Okay. you were talking I think you're talking about this one. One time we were at a party. I really had to shit. And I said, Dave, Will you come like keep me company? like I don't want to like walk And it was like some like huge bathroom. And we were I think we were in like the primary like room or something Yeah. It's a good room.re We're taking shit and it's taking like a about we, that is I am I am What Royal We. Royal We. Su I'm just hanging out. I'm taking a shit Dave goes, there's someone in here. And I said Yeah. And I said, What? And he said, I think there's someone in here. And I said because we were in the bathroom of a bedroom of a bedroom of like the big bedroom. And I was like, reallyally? And we like, look out. Bically we basically decide to walk out and as we're walking out, we cross paths with you and a person you were dating at the time. I't remember this at all. It was it wasn't like you weren't hooking No letting him We were going into the bedroom as we were leaving. It was just it happened to be a person you were dating. I don't remember this at all. I think I do remember this. Was it that party that was at Michael Jackson's old house? Oh No all blend together. had. This was a different life.. was a me and Dave just blew up a b I blew up a bathroom We're walking out and we think someone's in there. Doid you guys know each other at the time? No. I wish I was around for those parties. I really would have enjoyed that. Selena will always be like, she'll be like, donon't you miss like the party life? And I'm like, no. And then she's like, why? And I was like She's like, don't want to throw more parties? And I said, No, I said, The point of the party is to find love my life. Yeah. I said the party's over. I' the party. Is wast the only reason you guys were having them, was it likeike you guys were doing it for fun, everyveryone, right? I felt my entire happiness was totally predicated around like the romantic opportunity of like the night. So not why I was doing it. There were a lot of parties. It was not because I was looking for love. You were just trying to party. No this like this will make people like me. We all love Yeah. W different time. That's different though. I did all immediately because of the party. It's true.. But do you a social person in real life? or were you doing this thing? No, not really. I used I was like fucking Gatsby I used to throw parties and then I'd go hide. Yeah. And then and then I'd go out And I'd people come up to me like on the street and they'd be like amazing time at your house. like you throw the best parties and I'd be like, hell, yeah, I don don't remember any of that. don't know who that person was. They would basically just go like, ha, I would throw a party I'd hang out in my bedroom most of the time And then everyone would leave And I would be like, I did it. I socialized. and everybody is gonna like me. Oh my God. And I I stopped doing that. Were you sad when you were like bit, like really big? Really? Miserable. Really? Oh my God, yeah. What do you think was the driving force of misery I great question. I think okay, the fun answer is like it just sucks like in this It's not very fun. S serious answer the slight hearted answer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think the serious answer is like I I just kept I never I didn't stop for a while to think about what I like and want and what brings me joy in my life. You know, I was so young when I put out my first record that I think that for so much of my career, I felt like I feelelt like I worked for someone So m I felt like an employee. Yeah. Eventually, it occurred to me. I was like, I'm in control of this whole thing. Like I don't have to, you know, I think it still felt like a kid where I f feelel like all the grown ups in the room were gonna be disappointed in me if I said no or if I didn't want to do something or I couldn't do something. And then eventually I was like That's not how this works at all. Yeah Yeah. You know, you can you sh Yeah But you like making music. Like you like singing it. Yeah. Yeah. You want to do it on your own terms. Definitely. The only time I remembered you where the only time because I didn't know you were sad during that. The only time I rememberednce you did, I wrote so many song I saw you. I know but its got No. I knew you be like, I'm so miserable and No No I knew you were angry. I knew you were like I didn't know yet You know, so it felt like garbage all the time and didn't understand why, you know? Yeah. So like that was like a big part of it too, I think. You really f you felt like shit, a Oh my Godd. How long did you feel like shit without knowing you were sick for Oh, like eight years. Oh wow. My first like blood test in my chart Like when I got diagnosed with Lubis, they were like We could have called like if someone wasaying attention, we could have figure this out like eight years ago. Yeah, that it take them so long. Beuse I just did you not go to ever complained. Did you go to to No? Oh I just also like, you know, I grew up like Where you from Jersey Oh, Philly. Yeah Yeah. Where from Michigan? Where you from near Red Curst? Why do you do that when you think about do you not love the where you? Oh no, he's asking where in Jersey I'm from It's hard to say. I moved a lot. Oh. Do you have any friends? Do I have any friends? No, I mean, no, not really. Yeah. Really? I would say like the way my parents raised me accidentally made me like really well equipped your career. My career. Yeah. I'm like used to move I don't have like, I'm not attached to like one place, you know. Did your experience like a high school in one? I did, yeah. How was your high school experience? What do you guys think it was like? Aere you cool on the coun? I wasn't cool on the cou.ool. I know you don't. No, she's nerdy. She's like unbelievably intell. I wasn't hot, but I was still smart and cool. You said you weren't cool. Cool Gody, just wait you got big off like tumblr, right? Yeah.. I never I never had a tumbler experience. Really? Yeah I do remember when I was younger They had like the best like like pictures. It was really cool. It was really like well curated, like it's for like art. Yeah. Is it you know, I also never had experience with My sppace. Are they similar in just It's very different No. My sppace is like Gerber baby food. This is like this is like tumbler's like Tumblr's like your mother making you perfect like organic food. Like it's so curious. Actually I haven't thought about tumblr in a long time, but I did't I have one. I thought that they I still have one. Do Are you still active on it now? Yeah, but I guess I have like a very small But he used to be like following there. It's like where I go to post stuff that I don't want everybody else to make a big deal out of. Yeah. You know, L I could post like a really sad poem on there or like a life update and it never makes its way to like regular press respectful community. Yeah. If I Yes it is. But if it's like if I posted the same thing on like Instagram or something the next day. Yeah, the next day be like, Azie posts troubling stuff All right. Do think I feel this way and maybe I'm wrong because I'm And don't I'm basing this off of nothing, but I feel like each little like internet thing has a different personality. There's like ye the way they speak on Instagram, the way they speak on YouTube, the way they speak on Reddit. I post certain things on TikTok that I way never post on my Instagram ever. I think that also One thing that I had a hard time with was Tumbler took itself so seriously. But also like you could really joke around and it didn't matter. It was also faceless. L you know what I mean? Like you could post like poetry, photos, art, it was more about what you were making and what you were into. It was about like what you looked like. So that was really important. And if you did have like an aesthetic of the way the way you looked, that was helpful. Y.ike you know, I did, obviously. I had like the hair colors and like ye. Ohah the hair the hair toally was Her hair was like the whole thing. What what do you mean? it was pink hair at one time had different color hair. She had two extremely famous. Yeah. It was blue.' blue.. Blue was like, How long did you have blue hair for? long enough. Have you No are you say it? No,. What are you gonna say? I was gonna to say, have you have you like Do you ever bring it back for fun?id't you just do just did it? You just did it. And I remember when you brought it back, it was like but do you ever bring it back outside of that or no? No, I mean, it was the ten year anniversary of Badlands and I did like an anniversary tour so I brought the blue hair back for that. my debut album. Yeahah, I done ha it every a couple of weeks. Really? Yeah. I got tough hair You must, my hair got tough hair. You like going on tour Love it. Yeah. I love it. Is that your happy place on stage? Yeah. I love performing. Is it kind of the only reason I still Yeah. M make music. It's your favorite part of the whole thing is performance. Yeah, I like making the records too. I like it a lot better now Yeah. Like it used to be really stressful. Labels were like really involved. Did that change though, or was it just But Yeah has changed. Yeah. no, I think that I don't know. I think I just I got less famous, so people stopped caring as much. What do you mean? You know what I mean? Like when you were making pop records and like it was like all lots of pressure and it was like it was kind of nice that everyone was like Just like let me do my thing You think you're less famous now than before. But what is? how do you measure that nowadays? Is it just like you feel like it's You just can sense it. Yeah I'm tru asking How would sure that you're l fam Curiious? No, ye. I like no, I guess like I think it'll swing it's all cyclical. H. You know I'm just like really enjoying this peh timeim, right? you had what's like a You're saying like when you go outside, like nobody knows who you are. No, that's not I'm like She're saying she was like She entered very young on this like mega star trajectory. It was really c. being pulled in every direction, now you feel like you're like I. Yeah. And that's like I must Oh my life just looks different. You know, L'm I'm not. She was living every step in being like bigger, bigger. How can I like? Yeah, I was like every award show, you're doing a performance, you're flying of this, you're do, you know, I remember it was like this. It was like, she' like put out and it was like this. and people were like, Ohh, this is like this is like a thing. And then it just went like literally, it went like from here, it was like angling up, you were like, o, this could be good. And then it was like And like and like hit through the thing. But then when you said that you realized you were unhappy, when you first realized that you were like taking off, were you like riding a high or o my Godd, ecstatic. Which one was your first number one? Closer song. Yeah,ah. My first solo number one was without. Are you excited to make a new album? Yeah. I starting No God no. Hip pop album One day? No, deffinitely not. Do Do you push it off? Like do you get anxiety about never start? I always want to be doing it now but I actually like I feel like the way it happens for me is I always kind of like I was like find a I don't say like a vibe, but there's always like a story or like a, you know, something like that. Like a theme? Yeah. and I stumble upon that and then it's like when that feels right, I'm like, okay, go off and So what do you doing with that? Like what you do last week Last week, I went to Vancouver with Aban. We to go visit his parents brought under. Then I flew home, I did treatment Oh my God. which was treatment. Oh t Yeah yeah. I did I did chemo. which I did twice a year Yeah. you're still doing o. Tice a year for That's tough. The. foreseeable future, I guess. wayay better though than It used to be like once a month. Is this so scary? Yeah, it's like I'm used to it now. What does it make you feel like? Horrible. for like a couple days. It's like just nauseous. If you feel like, okay, the way I explain it to people is like you're being poisoned 'cause you are. So like imagine like the worst the gnarliest hangover you've ever had in your life Yeah. You also did like a ton of drugs. You didn't drink any water. My best friend got like breast cancer like when she was twenty And so she did the she did all the It's like like it's like your entire body is being poisoned. Yeah. Yeah. So you got W you got of breast cancer? No, no, I didn't have breast cancer. I had a blood cancer. Oh, I have a blood cancer. Yeah. Okay it's chronic so I'm gonna to have Thats why you have to keep getting chemo and ye yeah. o. I also do it to treat my lupus. Oh, it helps with that. Yeah. Is it can you get I might be wrong with this, but like it's very hard to have lupus if you're white, correct? It's like mostly predominantly mostly like people American women. Latin women. women feel.'s That's what I I'm half black. so yes, that was another thing too is like a lot of my doctors were like That sucks, you look so white ' we probably would have found this a lot sooner if we knew. And I was like, I told you guys. you're like, yeah, we didn't really take it seriously. really consider. the jeans are the same brother. McDonald's has a subdivision. I don't know if they call it a subdivision, but it's called the Mafer. And what this subdivision of McDonald's does is it pumps up beverages that are so high end starting the strawberry watermelon for presressure. Why can't you speak? I said you're so excited about. He's got a watermelon refresure. And he's feeling really good. And when you have a little bit of caffeine in you, you can You gott to look at this like a reset, almost like a reward. thoseose little strawberries bouncing around. I mean, it's a way to get through the day for me. you don't have to use this type of language I love it. It is we Yeah. Honestly, it's a reason to hang with friend all the new McCafe drinks now at McDonald' G guysys, we gott to figure out our outdoor patio areas furniture wise. and I think Wayfair would be a valuable player in that. There are a lot of options. I think I sent you a few if you could just go through. Gone through a check, you mind through. Yeah, you did. You mind buying me something? I really could use a nice cooler I putut all of our. I'm never gonna buy you anything. more money than me. Get pressed for patio Susan for way less. Head to wayayfairot com right now to shop all things home. That's wAYFaR dot comot Wayfair. Every style, every home You know, when you say that you stumble upon a theme, Yeah, do you mean like a story vibe of like kind of or do you mean like a sonic vibe that's like either. Okay. One or the other and then eventually both. And it like is it like based on what you're going through in life at the time? Could be. Yeah. My life is way less dramatic than it was. Do you find that like As an artist, it's like harder to pull from the more mundane parts of your life, or do you think that's just not even thinking about it No, I think so I think it's interesting because I think that I think as a society, we've gotten so used to receiving really mundane information. You know, like everyone loves like influencers and podcasts and YouTubers where everyone's just kind of being like, this is my day to day blahahike this show. This is hard hitting This is an journalism. o. I am a product of my experiences and like I'm so responsible. but like if I didn't have my notes, so many jokes in my show wouldn't existure. because I'm just so like when something funny happens, I really do I'm like, oh my God, I have to write that down. It's like so specific. Yeah I don't go out gain material. I really like try to live life and then whatever happens happens. I. I'm just getting something from the fridge. But you're like aren't you like a You're like an artist in so many don't you like do so many different types of art beyond Like, areren't you like can't you draw really well? Yeah, I paint. Yeah. I yeah, I'm definitely like a physical artist, like But I like that I have that for myself though. She's the best drawer I've ever seen. She can she could right now draw you perfectly in seconds. You you could put me on the spot I used to do Beny doodles when we were all the time. She's drawn overalls for me that are like my prize possession. I those overalls. So when I like I draw, can't you? No, Listen. So it's funny, you give big I can draw enter. I'm the worst drawer to. Yeah, like where I had to like I had to take an art course in college. so I was like And and I was getting great grades and all the other things and I was so bad at drawing that I was like You couldn't grade me well. like I was going to fail the class because the drawings were so bad and I couldn't really show improvement. So drawing is actually my biggest weakness now I have justust for relaxation purposes started to like paint in kind of an abstract way. That's great. Right. I have no idea what I'm doing. I don't. because with my art sometimes I really, I mean, all the time, I'm like so analyzing everything, which is kind of the antithesis of art of like free flowing let, But with painting, I'm so bad that I really don't hold myself accountable. and just free flow. When we did the It wasraised I'm the person who is My art was appraised. Oh no, but he said I he's famous. No, that one was great. You had one painting. talking about American Fce? Yes. You have one painting that's a stroke of G genius, Everything else is terrible. I have three or four that are strokes of genius. No, you have one. I can stroke genius every now and then Okay, go stroke Genius right now. I believe it. I believe that supplied You can stroke genenius Can I attempt to strike genius as a painter and you doodle maybe Benny or Chris, or we could all doodle in paint? I don't know. we should all doodle. I'm terrible. I need a lot of time and quiet time to focus. So go the go get the stuff. Wait you're good at drawing that.. we'll go set it off. Yeah. I when it's like the one thing I objectively can't be like She's incredible. She li. it on like SNL or something. Oh real side. You do it for fun. Ohait, youide Yeah, Truly, number one, before I even knew who Benny was One of my favorite songs ever. I think I listened. She thought I was K. thateny was Kal I didn't know it, honey. I didn't know it I just a We're all c., I'm gonna to have the production team bring out and set up the paint supply. It's too much for one man You' actually paint. But before we paint, You just pull that from around the table? Yeah, we should have a white claw. pull it from the seat. The reason that we should have this whiteclaw first is because we're living in the moment. And I know that's something that Whiteclaw values and they value camaraderie and friendship. And I think us doing art as a team, even though I will probably stand out as an individual is something that is something to be cheers. Hey, since we're in the moment, you might grabbing me and Kristen a few whitels How about you share this one? Okay and I'll make sure we get all set up with the art supplies. Okay 'causeuse I'm really great artist I got even muck his ke on. We got a lot of shit. I think I'm gonna blow you out of the water. You don't understand my style is a parent You guys. Draw me and Dave. Okay. Well, we're the same person, so just draw me. your' where she's gonna make something better than that in under five minutes. Nothing would be do what I'm to do. It's unbelievable Yeah, I was gonna say you guys like being married. Oh my go. Yeah. it helped. Oh You guys go first. I love it, but it feels no different than it. It's No different to me, yeah. Yeah. But I do like that it feels like you have family for life. Oh. I've been engaged for two years. Oh you have? Yes. Are you gonna get married? Yes, we're gonna we're just really fucking busy, you know. Also went to Benny's wedding and we were like, like is this is what a wedding is supposed to be like? We're doing everything wrong. Oh my gos. I forget. Do I have water that I'm supposed to dump the brush in? It depends. Are you using acrylics? I don't know What does it say in the bottle Arylic paint. Yeah, yeah yeah. But then you can. if you want the paint to be thinner and more watery, then you can need a big brush in the water. You a big brush. I think there's more brush. Oh yeah, yeah yeah. Okay, so I just gotta, you know, you should do find me that one in the corner, Chr Chris, is that me? wayere out here Was that a Christmas tree? I was just getting warmed up. Okay. I'm trying to get my hand Look at mine. Len take a second to get situated again. I do it so light. Well I like this it. L lightight. Wait till you see where my I might wow you I'm gonna draw Beny. I can't even tell you what I'm gonna draw 'use my spirit is gonna take over. Don't they say drawing a hand is the hardest thing or fingers, right I don't know. Pardemard You I explain to you how I operate when I paint? Yes. I have no idea what I'm doing. can't like If you said like draw a person, I can't do that impressively. All I can do is randomly do stuff And sometimes in my randomness, I will all of a sudden see a person. And then once I see what the thing is that I'm painting without realizing what it is to begin with, once I see it, it's about how fast can I get out? You're already ahead of the curve. The longer I stay in, the more I can fuck it up. I have a lot of realism. like Oh yeah, I can't. When I started painting I started painting again after my son was born And I got like an art studio and I would go there when he was like asleep at night and I would go and I would paint and had a really hard time because so much of what I learned about art was about technique and it was about proving how good you can be instead of proving like how emotionally meaningful p I can make. So I had to really It was really hard for me to unlearn like, Nobody cares how well I can draw something in front of me and make it look like a picture. someone I care. I care about that a lot. I just had to do a lot of unlearning in that regard because I was like It was very straight A student vibes. I wasn't like a cool artist who was like L lookook what I have to say. I was like, look how good I can do it. Why did you know you could draw Oh when I was really little. Was that like your like number one thing for a long time until music? or were you doing both at the same time? Yeah, no, I thought I was gonna be like an art major, yeah. Oh wow Yeah. I wonder you're on Tumblr. Yeah, I was like, you know what will be the best career is being a painter. That will make me a lot of money. And then when I realized that that wasn't a real er option for me. It is for some people. I was like, I should do something that's more financially responsible. L try to be a pop star. Well I can't believe you just you just decided. I think I just created a really good color And'm gonna I get performance anxiety where I've already taken, I've already gotten like four new pieces of paper. No, you can't mamp You can't mess up. There's no mess up. I can't even draw a circle. I'm not even messing up. I'm just drawing. So I can just do abstract then? No, it's impossible and mess up. It's art I might have just made an error There's no such thing as air. Yeah, but I try to infuse the green and I might have just ruined everything. No, don't worry, Cck, it's gonna be good. I think I gota inject some pink Oh, I got a good base here, though. I gotta tell you Wow, I've never been in this huue before This is a brand new escape Are you discovering the new style? Man, this is a brand new escape for man. It might be my sunset piece. He's been discovering the new style This is honestly might be my career for the last eleven years. Drawing people is so uncomfortable because you're like staring at them and they're like, stop. I feel been looking same thing my whole life. Like I draw like ears the same way You know what I just realized? What This thing is upside down That's okay. You' o, I see what you mean. You f f you found that it was upside down minute No, that's not true May Is it perhaps may be horizontal? No, it's just I'm still figuring it out I'm still in the figure out process. I don't know How do you feel about it, Dave, A are you excited to show it? No, I haven't even started I'm serious. Well, you better get started soon. All I've been doing is laying a base It's called activating the Canvas. Ooh. Is that what it's called?? Do you know in Finland? There's a bread you can buy and it's called Juicy Pussy And's the real bre It's just a normal bread company. What Fuck are you talking about? There's a normal bread company. Is it dis spelled something similar and you're just Childish and you just childish. here you tell me what you think I'm combining. How would you pronounce this, Chack I don't know. but it's Kristin. Gisi. Gispi. How would you pronounce? Gispi? Justpisi . Jespus. Yeah You don't know that it's not justupusy. It's literally juicy pusy. Jicy pusy I don't know. I don't know how they say it. J just because It just Beison by headad. When you were the biggest, did you feel the worst, you think? Like, was there ever a time where you were like, holy shit, this is sick. Yeah. no, I I had times like that. Like you mean like like where you were able to be like, I'm this is what a cool experience. Yeah, where' I feel like This is dope and like I The younger me would have the hell out Yeah, you know, to see my life be this way. The coolest was probably probably I made an album with Trent Resnner. yeah. And I have like a we were filming like the process and We were filming when I had my like initial Zoom call with him where we were talking about if we were going to do the record or not And he was very complimentary of me as like a songwriter. And that was kind of like a moment for me where I was like, cool Yeah that's Nobody can ever make me feel like sh about myself Ttally. all y'all opinions. It Rer just said I was a good songwriter and we're gonna to make an album together. Yeah getet buucked. Did you read comments? Me? Yeah. He I used to. I do sometimes still Because if you were to remove yourself from the internet and just look at all of your success, wouldn't you be like, man, I'm like a Yeah, I would definitely be like, I'm so dope, but it it's just because you probably yeah, get the internet will They have power Yeah I to give it to him. I dont think anything is in life. I think we're also from a generation where like since we grew up on like the cusp of social media Like we didn't grow up with it all the time like some of these younger kids have, but we grew up with it like it mattered what the kids from our like high school or college or whatever we're saying on there. where we have like a really weird relationship with it. You know where we can't ignore it the way that they do. Yeah Um I mean, imagine being a kid today, like a true kid. No. But they don't know yeah, I actually don't understand how they do that. Imagine like YouTube came out when I was in coll I was a senior in high school. Oh, really? two thousand six. Oh ye Check, how's your thing going? The imagery is dark and it's about it's about I think it's about war O Well, that's relevant I wish it wasn't so.. Maybe you're feeling internal stress about what's going on. Maybe you'll become one of the most important like political. Artists of our time. I hope not because I don't know enough. O maybe like when we're all dead people will like discover the art that you made Yeah end up in your like biography that you were really important. I'm scared to make any. like the loologist aggressive Political commentary. I like this sound. I wonder if anybody else does. How come you switch paintings Me? Yeah. Well, I didn't love what I did in my last for, but I liked your last for Ien have so much hair. Are you getting get close to my? I think so. You think Dave's getting close his master. It be edging Are you edging, Jack It's war zone Looks like a blood bath. Isn' that a lot of red No, it's not what you expect, but it's definitely about W America and war in the state of our world. Yeahah It's dark, but it's light at the same time. there's some hope. There's optimism within it? Tind of, but it's a tragedy of a piece. What do you want to call it I think that's called American warar Is it a companion piece to American Fce it might be It actually might be. Are you disappointed? No, it's just it's a lot to take in. It's jarring It's like I didn't think that this is what it would be at all. You seem like you like it though. I mean, like is you't you can't help but both be shocked by it and in awe of it, I think I don't like that I like it. I think that's Ch. Do you think you're gonna like my? I think I will like yours. I think I'll like everyone's Do you guys think you'll like mine? I don't think you'll like mine, but I think you'll see that there is talent deep, deep within. I see yours. I like yours. Is that a cockroach? My guy kind of looks like Tupac Who are you drawing? I was just like drawing. I came to your hat. I was drawing Chris. Sorry I started saying, it looks like Tupac. I was like, whoo the fuck here? I'm drawing Chris. I can't believe Dave Zine looks like a c gush Don't make a decision like that. The part of art is having the control to believe in yourself and knowing to stop. Don't do it. Knowing me to stop and trusting that you're done trusting that it's time to put it out Now it's done You guys, I've been using Canva, you know, Canva? Oh yeah. I've been taking pictures of places in our house, then I ask it to I prompt it and I say, can you redesign this space for me? And I have a lot to show the two of you. Oh, really, like we're part of the home Well, our bedroom. Oh And the upstairs studio. Oh. And the downstairs. I think we could do something different with like the shelves. So so Canva is telling you options, I guess. It's helping us. Is telling you prices? Not yet. Canva makes design easy for anyone with built an AI that lets you remove, generate and animate content and just a click. Start designing today at cananva dot com d White cllaw Remember that one time when we hung out and then we never stopped hanging out for fifteen years in a row? We really grabbed life by the cloth. Are in that group chat? No, but you're in it now. You're our new. Say yes. Say yes,ay for the rest of our lives. Oh say yes Yes. you know, I will tell you, there's nothing better than spontaneous hangs with white Claw. I got a little I'm having some issues. Ilease drink responsibly H Selzer with flavors. White claws. White Claw seelzer works. Okay, Chico. Okay, you ready? Ready? ready? Yes Please drink responsibly hardard seelzer with flavors. Whitelaw Selzer works. Chicago, Illinois Say yes. Okay. whereere are you at? Oh, are we done? I can be done now you think? No, keep going. This is fine.' relax. We' w to see the Who's going first Not me.'ll go fores. Chr Jo They've already said it looked like a cop of your painting. Now pretend that here's what I want you to pretend before I show up. Pretend that I have made money off of making art and pretend that people love my art Okay. I understand. And like this is like she's done another one. Yeah. Okay ready? Yep Oh wow The rooach. I really like the signing the point of view. It the pen one? You know what's crazy about it is I've drawn the same thing since I've been five. That You've drawn that. two trees and a face that looks like this. That's crazy. Is it good you've drawn that multiple times. That one disturbbs me. Yeah, I think I might' have sent you to your therapist if you kid. that? That's c o, okay. That's more disturbing me. That's worse. It's a heart I don't like that one. Iind of like that's a crrazed chimp. Yours are like d Dolly, like ye. No, that's my least favorite Why't you show yours hot shot? I wouldn't say mine was great. Let's see what you got. Big boy. Let's see what you got. Thick guy in shock Prettyainting, huh Friends isn't Tikey? Tricky. Who is that supposed to be? I don't know if it was just a man. I'm surprised. I look like too pot. That is a lot better than I thought you'd be able to do That is good. Yeah. I'm surprised you'd be able to do something that good. I'm almost upset. Why? Can I see it again? I thought they like that a lot. That's incredible. I'm shocked that you can do that. the details in the it. I hate I think you ruin the dialogue Like if you did the wrote the perfect thing there, I would have You know, Okay, As is your turn. or no it Dave's turn first I don't think I think once you see mine, you're not gonna w to do much anything else. That's fine. Let's. I can go next if you wantanna go last. Not just depressing, it's about We'll keep'. I know you' gonna be incredible. I can tell Oh my God. This is Benny I'm shaders. I did not think that's what I was going to be like That's cool. I like it. It's beautiful. Can you draw anything? Probably look at that. that looks like a fuckking. Would you draw a fast Would you draw a fast doodle? That of Kristen, just a fast doodle. But are you gonna be a good sport about it? Yeah., she'll be a good. J like a fast doodle. When I look at this, this is the best thing I've ever seen in my life. I mean, this is, does the world know that you can do this? Yeah. They don't care. She did it literally on SNL while singing Nobody cares. You know, I'm gonna have to don't don't look at this. I have to set it up and then you Okay. No one else I'm gonna to look when no. don't don't, don't'. We're not looking. Just look towards me. David you No not ye, I'most done don't look, don't look. Okay. Don't look Okaykay, hold on How long we have to wait? Yeah, you guys can look Wow. It doesn't feel depressing at all. No, and that's that's the saddest part of it No, I think it feels good. just another day. It's really good.. It's really nice. It's like It's very floral It's giving like waterlies. Crosshairs. I really like those collar those collars over there. This is horrible It's a planned attack. Oh, thoseose are the fighter jets Chick, I just don't like the splatter part No, I love the splatter. Who wants the? I like how the splatter matches the A. The texture is great USA But light is a different color because what is it Just happenstance. Okay ia I actually really like this. I You can take it. I think more. Only we can have this. Can I have this? Yeah. That's me.'ll put it on the wall. I just if I'm gonna draw you have to stand still I'm gonna. Hold on second. So do you want me to cut around the dud this stuff, right U whoa, You don't cheuck. what are you doing? Just leave it. I like it just how it is. I like the idea that we were gonna edit it, but we chose not to That' we don't. No, no, no,. Okay. Now, but I can cut off this part, right? Well, this wasn't check. I'll leave it folded. Just just leave it. Just put it in the thing and leave it Jck if you like it. Actually take it with you and frame it Take a care of it. Bring it back to me fram Bring it back to be frameed Actually, keep it on the clipboard and frame the clipboard. Okay. Bring it back framed. Thank you, Chuck Have you ever sign the national anthem? Fuck no I don't know that kind of voice. Can you just sing it? and like if we were like, I'm not saying that you have to do this, but if we were just like Yes, sing the national anthem, you would just be able to sing it and you would feel good about it and everybody it would be like, this is like she did it. No. I don't, you have to Oh, no, no way. She invented a style of singing that was so characteristic that it became like a meme and everyone in the world started pretending to sing like her. Yeah, and then I got made fun of for it. No, really? Yeah. Everybody else was eating off my fucking plate. 'ause you were the first to do it, you think There was a couple years where like if you put on the radio would go Is that me? that's not me? That one's not me. When I record with Benny, I call it baby Voice. What's that man?s I like her baby voice. It bab. M more like high pitched, like sassy. Like all the songs we did, like Eastide, they all have babyaby voice. I like What was your big Without me? Yes.out that's not the baby voice. There's a little bit of baby voice in that s. Iook was like empowered. L like night' not baby voice. It's a different. But you also kind of like East side, don't you have like kind of like kind of like a rapper's cadence almost in the way. You know what's funny, That's why I love doing songs that Ed starts so much. Oh yeah. writer that I Really But you also do a rapper's cadence a lot in is it because we write so similarly. It's like syncopated. It's very She's so lyrical. like the lyrics come to her like what's rappers like cadence? It just means like instead of It's rhythmic like more syllables than, you know. Yeah. I don't even think I don't even think you remember like how many songs of hers that you know. Oh my God Do you need a napkin or something? No, I'll wash my hands. It does. You get a lot of the pen or the pen Ohow It's just a little cutie. I me try a brass stall. Oh wow, let me see. into like a brass stall. see Oh my God. I it? You can dr so manyilled wine all over my microone. You have to stay all day. I'm sorry. A night. What's your favorite of your own songs ever I think nightmare is one This This is a unique song. I've never heard another song that sounds like that ever Like it's such a unique song. I play it every night. I've never I haven't done a show since that song came out where I don't play that song. we made hellis. We went on tour together. So much music, reallyally? Yeah, we went on tour. Are they like jumping around at your shows and getting lildd Yeah, they're like los their m. O alm like a rock show. like it is now. ye. Yeah. ye. that show iss way more like. It's like not live. It's like not going to No. It looks crazy.. I'm Travis Scot. Yeah. per forform like a psychopath. L People come to the shows and they're like, I know that song and then they get out there I'm like like screaming and jumping around like fire they're like, what fuck it's fun. Have you ever gotten hit by like a pyrotechnic like the time I was on stage I was blown in the face and I was jarring. I have a few times. Yeah, notothing like like I was injured, but definitely a few times where I've been like, that could have been horrible. Yeah. Like if you I had like a really Um scary experience once. I was in Turkey I was in Istanbul and I was gonna to do a show and I there was like a two thousand pound trus that was like broken on top of the stage And they were trying to decide if they're going to let me go out or not. And it was like hanging. and I was like, am I gonna die? Yeah. Did you just perform? I did. yeah. Yeah. Everything was okay. Were you on edge the whole time? I was. I wouldn't go out unless I knew that someone could be tell me for sure that it was safe, but they weren't sure for like an hour. And then finally they like gotot it in a place where it was like good or whatever I am a mess right now. I have a question about making music before you make an album, do you think like, ooh, like Bea are you gearing up to make an album? Yes and no. Yeah. I am. I'm like, I'm getting ready to go. I like to go Okay, this is so stupid. I usually like to go away for like a little bit And just write stuff So not necessarily music, but I have to go like I had to go play like pretend for a little. I like that. Like change your mind. Yeah. You had to go become someone a little self expression. Yeah. Like I had to go like live a different life for a little bit. Yeah you think for a while. Yeah like touch to something. Yeah. Yeah. L I'll go like, I'll be like, okay, I'm gonna to go get an Airbnb in like Japan and like go to this little market and like hang out with the kids in the park and like cook and I'm like I'm someone else. Yeah a little bit. and then I kind of see the world through that perspective or like I'll be like, you know, I'm going to go live in a cabin in the forest. And when you're doing this and you're writing phrases and whatnot, is there even music involved? or you just write the words and then like later the music comes and you remember the few phrases. I pretty much always write the words first. Interesting. Yeah. And like because I'm really Like wordy percussive. Yeah. I feel like the music sort of like reveals itself like There's certain cadences that the rhymes or like the words have to fit in. and so that really helps with interestnteresting. The melodies are just kind of already there, you know what I mean? I've never written any lyrics without the beat. Really? Ever. Yeah No, because but it's my own I'm so trying to make like the best version of itself. This is probably my flaw as an artist. I'm always trying to like, does the beat have to be like almost printable or do you just need like a like a bass? I know, I want the beat because you know how like beats have like different turns and like I want to like optimize every moment and be like, this is the best way that I could go from but the thing it's kind of my downfall as an artist 'cause' trying to optimize every moment iss not like the raw. And you're trapped to that container Exactly of the song. Yeah. I used to make Benny pull up all his like rapper beats. Yeah. Like I would be he'd like sit down When we first started working, like he'd be like Cool I have these like, you know, starts, these like pop song starts and I'd be like Mmm. ye L go and get me the folder that you like the juice will. Yeah, yeah, one hundred percent. and And then I'd write and then we'd have to like derpify them ' I always sounded like weird. Do you like working with Benny? I love working with Benny Benny's also were like the most efficient Yeah. People ever. Wet feel like three songs done. I feel like one of your strengths is that you don't waste time, you pretty much know what's good and what's not and you really once you don't waste time I would never bring anything to the table that's not Or let it go down a path that Oh, yeah,ah I' rather just really has a of a that's like brutal. Yeah I No I know like, let's try something out. Yeah like No, but I was most like not Yeah Okay I for sure the idea is so quick. You can't be like thin skinned, I think. I've gotten this far just by trusting my gut. So if I feel something that doesn't feel right it's like I'm not really that good at anything. I just think I have pretty good instincts G. Yeah I think I have a good think your instincts are right one hundred percent of the time. No, but I think they' right more than out there that might be forgot I'm sure I'm sure. I think that you actually It actually don't agree with you fully. I think there's things you're objectively very talented at, that you have a lot that you bring to the table. But I would say your best skill set is that you are an excellent curator You can curate friends, artwork, interior design, an outfit, a song, a sound, like you understand all the different parts of a thing that have to come together to make it Best Yeah and its most unique experience. There's never a time where I feel like you would say something was E big song and it wouldn't be. O I've been wrong of sometimes. Degrees of big But usually it's beyond your control. Usually if you're wrong about that, it's because of something weird that happened with like the market or the way it was released or like the way the label promoted it or whatever. as big You know Do you think you'll always be able to just guarantee big songs? think I think what I know is I think I know what people want what people want. like I think if if what women want if there's a full there I think if there's a full like I think if we have this thing right here. I think I'll know what clips to make of this thing that will make people want to watch it. I don't have that skill set Well A lot of artists don't No. I don't have art skills. You know like when you make a song, I know you know and you love it, but do you also are like, I think this could be a big song, you have those thoughts? I think so, yeah. And I've also learned to listen to myself in that regard because I've had other people bet on records and I've been like, No, it's this one. Yeah. And also like I think the perspective always proves victorious in the end it's like, you know not to believe in yourself. I feel like that's a hard thing as an artist to be able to like hone in and trust your instinct. There so many artist pick the wrong song. Yeah, but it's also because you you're putting yourself on such like you're putting yourself out there at the same time to have the self belief to be like, I'm going to trust my instinct while you're also being so vulnerable That's how you become Sometimes you too close to it. That's the other thing. You could be too afraid or too like you need to know when also to take the opinions of others who are able to see you in a way that's like unbiased and like you also need to be able to be really honest with yourself, you know? I know that there's a version of me that I think I am and then there's the reality of the way that The zeitgeist or the audience or culture interacts with me. And like I'm a product of like every artistic experience I've ever had. but most people perceive based on the entry point of how they met me. So like if they heard closeoser for the first time and that's when they decided their opinion of me, they're like, she's this type of artist. You know? So it's like I noticice about my shows a lot because you'll get so many different types of people in a room. And there's like dudes in there that are like, I love nine inch nails and this girl fucks. like she rips, she made this rock album. That's awesome. And then there's some girls in there that were like we loved her in college. and she makes pop music that we love.s everyone has a different perspectivive when I'm like Okay, I'm a perceiving myself as like a product of all those things and I need to know when someone is going to There interaction or entry point to me different than that. and that's what's helpful about having someone like Benny H We've talked about this for years. What do you think the public perception of you is? I think people think I'm really intense Yeah. really like political and opinionated and like intense. and I'm really a very chill person Do you feel like that gets in your way? Like what if you just like didn't ever go online again and you just never went onine? I don't really. Be I don't really rightite now, but I think that they've because of I was nineteen. Yeah. I thought everything was my responsibility You know, I thought that My job was to comment on, care about, speak up for, advocate for. Yeah, which is a good spirence It was so meaning It was so well known. I wish I. It was so well meaning It's a shame that that the world beat you down to think where that was annoying. Yeah you know, sometimes you get it wrong a couple times though. That's the problem. Yeah' like, you know it It's like the idea of like when you when you What is it when you speak for everything, you stand for nothing kind of thing, you know, where it's like I did get it wrong a couple of times because I was really young and like, you know, it was growing up in front of the entire world, but also like Yeah, I was just young. I was just young. I was just like Even to this day, there's like videos that go around and people are like, oh my God, did I'm like, I was twenty in that video. I'm thirty one right now. You know what I mean? Like Ebody has to grow and change and you know, also not for nothing, like not to get really prove everybody's point about why I it was annoying right now, but like My life is so different than it was back then. Like the socioeconomic background that I come from, like the amount of just like panic, anxiety, the lack of financial security, the lack of safety that I had that time that I was still I was still in fight or flight from my life before. I'm just like, I'm more chill now. Of course I was panicking all the time. I was like, you know I support my mom, I support my dad, I support my brother, I support my grandmother. Like, if I fuck this up and this goes the wrong way, everybody's lives different. I gott to get this right. And was those were stakes that most of my peers didn't have. Yeah. I think everybody is really attached to like and also because those moments for me make the most noise. Yeah. So like I could do literally nothing for a year and like lay low. And then if I do one thing becomes like hol he claps back at theedat then that becomes the Th for the next thing for the year. you know what I mean? So it's like, I think I'm really I'm pretty I'm a pretty chill person, but people generally generally assumes that I take myself way more seriously than I do. So that's where it becomes a problem for me because sometimes I'll make a joke or like I'll do something that's like meant to be like lighthearted or funny and then the immediate assumption is that I'm being really serious. taking really seriously. E if I'm not saying you are, but what's the big deal if you take yourself seriously? But if I'm not, then it sucks because I don't necessarily want that being translated as like my main cause. Fam del Fals It's already that time. It's that time. It's that time. It's an exciting time for a lot of sports fans. Oh my's so stressful. Well, not when you know what's what? and you're ready to predict the future. Are you guys really excited to start predicting Look. I don't wake up thinking I'm gonna call my shot. I just have an intuitive nature to me where I kind of see what's gonna to happen. You know what? I have a real thing to say. Yeah. It must be a little bit more exciting kind of When you have real stakes involved? Yeah, on your prediction. Well, I'll tell you one thing. Yeah. I wake up in the morning For day You can predict the outcome of the pro basketball Finals games all the way to the end of the championship with Fandual Predicts. Sign up and grab your twenty five dollars bonus on Fandou Predicts and ride this play off journey with! This episode is sponsored by Better Help Benny, how has therapy made you a better person I think sometimes when you're deep in with your family and your friends, it's hard to see always the other person's opinion. Like for me, when I'm in therapy, sometimes I get checked by my therapists and they're giving me an unbiased opinion of the situation and what's going on. It truly gives you a toolbox of tools that you'll use with the rest of your life Well said. Therrapy has helped me And it can help you and the others in your life Sign up and get ten percent off at betterelp d. com slashvks. That's betterterhlp dot com slash FKS. There's a quote that I think you'll really love that I saw the other day There is no way to make or make material. challenges people and be liked by everyone Yeah And The more time you spend trying to appease others or to avoid confrontation or avoid conflict It's like every single time you do that, you pull a thread from your work in order to do so. and then you're left with a piece that's completely unraveled by the end. And you've given those threads away so you can never you can never put it back with the integrity of like, you know where you started. And I think especially in what you do You have a whole other layer to the kind of art that you make because comedy is a factor and comedy is challenging and it's disruptive and it's provocative and it's controversial, and that's the nature of it. is supposed to make people feel that way I would not survive that at all. I just simply wouldn't survive that. Like I feel like it's hard enough having to have a point of view about what I do and wanting it to be cool or sexy or emotional or meaningful or to perform well. If I had to add the layer of comedy onto it and I had to worry about navigating that, that's got to be really have I just can't imagine how I could argue that it makes it easier I could argue that yeah, kind of like it allows for things to be softened and like you can say something without I wrote a song the other day that was like u It was called I'm wororried Sure. And it was about like woror and then it was also like every now and then I would sprinkle in like things about the state of the world that were true that were that I would feel kind of lame being like But but also you're worried that the Barist at your favorite coffee shop like fucking he really dislikes you kind of worries Yeah for sure. But I just think I'm worried I'll never finish the Basically if I made a song that was really about like that was trying to like be political and being like, I'm worried about everything that's going on in the world. Like I would have so much more trouble doing that version of the song than the song where I get to like be like Say that. and then the next line is like, I'm worried that I'm gonna want to fuck the robot, like in ten years when the root and then I get to make that joke that it get I don't even you're worried that you want to fuck. I'm worried don' want the robot to fuck me.. Are you scared to be sincere? Like are you not sincere at So you want the robot to fuck you? that' I think in music, I have more fear of being serious than I do like on film You know what I mean? They have other miums though. you want the robot to fuck you ' Bea I'm also rapping. It's like it's hard for me to take myself serious You're just going over that line. you said where you wanted a robot Look, I just think we're at a place in the world where it's like Will we get fucked by the robots Are we gonna to fuck the robots or are the robots gonna to fuck us I know I feel the same way. Like I think I could sit here right now and I could be like, you know, Like you could be like, u Earlier, like you'd be like, were you having fun when you had like the number one song?ike like, No, I fucking hated my life. I'm joking. Yeah Yeah. And then I's like, haaha and you can see me in person and I'll be like, no, I fucking hated my life. And that was cool. And then the quote is like, Halsey hated her life.'s they're in a cultureike they can they can be like L Dicky jokes about war and makes painting about the jokes of war. like Yeah. But I think that's the downfall of like human connection because so much of it is like not of that Like being around you, it's like even when you said that thing over there, I wasn't It wasn't so It wasn't as dramatic as it would sound in print. in print, I'd be like, Ohh, wow, but in real life, I was like, yeah, she's relatable. She didn't She experienced life and she didn't like that life.. I would so much rather people dislike me. And you're being ye because there's a lawnmower outide.ike I didn't know there was someone come through Texas chain something No, I'd rather people dislike me for being myself than to miss out on like so many years of my life being who I am because I was worried that they weren't going to like me 'cause they're not going to anyway. Social media and the internet is such like a presence of like admire me, look at me. and like real life is really like let me connect with you. Because everything's translated to internet culture, it miss like we lose the like sweetness of just being yourself and being able to say whatever you want. connecting and not judging people. Because really if we perceive people, we accept them we as they are and we or maybe we don't, but we L, we receive people and we experience people. We don't Judge or categorize people in real life. Yeah, there's more room for nuance, I think. Totally Um I mean, look, even though I went to a party you threw and you didn't even live in the house I feel like obviously didn't I feel like today having spent this time with you, I can't even wrap my head around how anyone could ever perceive you as annoying. usednoy. I really can't believe it. Its like I used to be really annoying. Oh I did. I gotta take a shit. All right, thank you so much. We love you. We love Thank you for having over.er talent . Thank you, McDonald for sponsoring this episode Thank you, Ala for sponsoring this episode