The Origin of the Ludacris Meme

Knowledge fight podcast feed listener, this is officially a sneaky snake. And then sneaky snake knows dancing , wiggle in and a hissin . Sneaky snake goes dancing . Giggle in and a kissin'. I don't like old sneaky snake, he laughs too much you see . When he goes a wiggle in through the grass, it tickles his under neath Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls and enemies, in here, out there, get on your feet one last time for Dan and Jordan Damn and Jordan, I'm sweating . Knowledge fight. It's time to pray. I have great respect for knowledge fight. Knowledge fight. I'm sick of them posing as if they're the good guys, saying we are the bad guys. Knowledge . And George. Knowledge fight . Andy in Kansas. Andy and Andy and Stop. Andy and Kansas. Andy in Kansas. And y. Stop. Andy in Kansas. You're on the air thing called it. Hello, Alex. I'm a thick fan color. I'm a huge fan. I love your room. Knowledgefight. com. I love you. I love you. Hey everybody Welcome to Knowledge Fight. I'm Dan Omdiorde . We are a couple of dudes who like to sit on stage, two brothers. And uh talk a little Celine, worse with the elder fleet. Talk a little bit about Alex Jones. Wait, do talk a little bit about Alex Jones uh oh indeed. Dan. Jordan . Dan. Jordan . Dan. Jordan . Dan ? Jordan. Dan? Jordan. I have a quick question for you. So man. Hold on. Let me redo the Dan again. Dan? Quick question. What's up? What's your bright spot today, buddy? My bright spot today, actually I'm gonna I I was I was gonna say that we went to go see Mortal Kombat. We did. And that was gonna be my bright spot. Yeah. But that's lackluster. That's small. And since this is a live show, and we're you know, I I felt like I should say you go first. Okay. You should give me your bright spot first. Wait, wait, wait. So you like soft launched a bright spot and it turned out everybody was not on it. I heard some applause for Mortal Kombat. Yeah, well, no, I gave a bad one. And now and now I'm left out to drive. Well, no, I have a better one. Oh, you do, you can do it . No, but better than Mortal Kombat. Well, I'll tell you what, mine you can't do better than mine because my bright spot is all of these people here tonight ! This is this is the live show that I've that I've always dreamt of, right? Like I remember ten years ago uh or more, I don't remember, I'm old.. I'm dying The r the like last L C D sound system show. You know, remember when that was the last one? At Madison Square Garden, I remember staying up late and smoking fifty to sixty cigarettes, watching that show in the middle of a terrible apartment by myself in the dark. And I was thinking someday I'm gonna end a podcast like that. So I think this is the dream, right? This is the dream. It's the dream. And you couldn't pick a better place to do it. No. That's basically Madison Square. Yeah. We have we have both performed stand-up comedy in this room? Yes, I'm I'm hoping to finally reach my dream of being mildly funny on this stage. I think you can cross that off the bucket list, baby. I think you have done great. I hope so. And what's your bright spot? What's your good bright spot? Well, I'd like to say that uh you know we're wrapping things up and there are a number of unfulfilled promises uh in terms of the show. Some unfinished business . Right. Some of this stuff, it's never really going to be wrapped up. We're never gonna figure out what happened with Hurricane Katrina. No . And we're never gonna jerk off back to back, so let's just leave that off the table. Let's just keep that off the table right now. Uh, you uh you don't remember? Sh it . We've been in a lot of hotel rooms since we've Baltimore got weird. You almost got robbed and then we turned off. Baltimore did get weird. No, so I I figured if w tonight here at this show, we have one last chance to pay off a promise. Yeah. Promises made, promises kept . Like Hubert Humphrey. Are we gonna finally figure out what the secret of 2017 was? No. God damn it! But that's that's not cool. It was Megan Kelly. Yeah, that's fair. And she was weird or something. Yeah. Um no, I I when we started this show and nobody was listening, I made a little bit of a promise. And that was that if we ever got to the point we could quit our jobs, that I would legally change my name to Scat Man Dan. That is a promise you made. And it's not a promise I've kept. I didn't think so. But I'd like to show you and the audience something. Okay. Alright, here we go. Ladies and gentlemen. It's a tattoo on his camp that is a scatman dan lad ies and gentlemen I have got a scat man tattoo on I got it this morning. Yeah. Didn't tell you about it. I was gonna say it looks very fresh. Oh, it's bleeding. It's definitely . I've been watching that three times a day at least. I was so worried about pulling up my pant leg because of the second skin. I was worried I was gonna gonna tear it off. It looks great. It looks great. Thank you. I feel like I'm I wish I could scat something that involved calf and I've been trying to in my head, but it's not common. That's all you gotta do. Yeah, but then but then try and put a calf in there. Skiba dip a calf. See? See? It sucks! Yeah, but who cares ? These people. This is about them. The ceiling and the floor for scattering . Are both in a latrine. And I realized as soon as I started saying that sentence like So how you doing? I'm doing good. I'm excited. This is this is kind of uh this is crazy. It's crazy way to to end the show. Yeah, any any any would anything would be. Yeah, that's true. But this is particularly crazy. This is particularly crazy. I think there's a lot of emotion tied up in this. Like this this particular stage , are we are we gonna be sincere? I don't know. I mean I don't think we w is anybody gonna stop us? I don't think anybody can. I will make fun of you if you do. That's fair. That's fine. That's fine. But while while we're here, we might as well be sincere. Sure. people in Chicago uh in com well suburbs comedy it's not as good. In suburbs comedy uh to uh to show me what he looked like with his pants around his ankles and and you know you never forget that. You never forget an open bike at the Laugh Out Loud Comedy Theater in uh uh Schomburg, Illinois, in roughly 2013 uh when Matt Druffkey showed me his boxer shorts. I'm really glad you took the time to get sincere and deal with your emotions. I well, I mean there's one that matters most to me, and that is the the amount of Matt Drofki's body I've How about you? How you feeling? I'm good. You wanna give you wanna be sincere or you wanna be fun? Yeah, I'll be sincere. Alright. I drove here. Nailed it. Nailed it. I uh I've I every time that I would come out here to perform at either you know here or at the shrine, I would always have to have someone else drive me. And it is a very weird feeling to have been like, I could I can drive myself. I almost was gonna take a lift out here for like a hundred fifty bucks. I'm like absolutely . Oh my god, Dan! Dan, holy shit, this just got fucking literary. This motherfuckers, this just got literary. Hold the phone, it got literary. This just got literary! Dan and I we met d riving to Aurora. I had to pick him up and drive out to the comedy shrine in Aurora for us to do comedy together. And now what could be more fitting than this man driving himself to Aurora ? Literary! This is this is the hero's journey ! I refuse the call. Get on here! For many years I said no, I can't drive . I got stuck behind uh a very large anime convention crowd in Rosmont. That'll happen. And I was like, this is like these people are they they should be going to our show? Or like how much overlap is there? Are we gonna lose audience to the anime convention? Could some of these cool anime conven tion people come in their fun costumes to our show? And that no. I don't see anyone dressed in crazy . I I don't think our show uh lends to cosplay. I would be concerned what cosplayers would be like, okay. I've been listening to a lot of knowledge fights, so here's what I'm gonna dress up as. I see someone dressed as Leo Zagami in the back. I feel like you should always have bright lights on you if you're Leo. If you're dressed as Leo Zagami, there should be a sign that says the devil over your head. I am the Antichrist. If I were him I would always enter every room with like a ta da Yeah, it's me. I have I have just entered this room . So Jordan we should probably we got an episode to do here. Do we have an episode to do? Yeah, we do. Oh man. But before before we get to the episode, I would like to a tiny bit of business. I thanked on our on our last episode, I thanked DJ Danarkey, Angela Lampsberry, and I forgot to shout out Jack who made our logo. And I felt really bad. So Jack, big ups. Thank you very much. Sorry. Yeah. Sorry . Big ups. Absolutely. So Jordan, we've made it nine years. Nine years. It's a long time to be doing a podcast. It kind of sucks to end. But if you think about it, we have out lived the combined time that Rob Schneider and Jim Brewer were on SNL . That's true. The two guys who went crazy right wing. That's true. Put them together, they don't touch us. That's true. And then together we are uh as as funny when Rob Schneider said you can do it in the water. So we've got that going for us. Yeah, me and Angela Lampsberry recently finished uh uh the hot chick and uh I can't I can't remember if this is a conversation we had off-air or on the podcast about how her internet went out halfway through the hot chick. I don't think so. I can see here's the problem with you guys watching the movies that you're watching. I don't know when we're talking about white chicks, the hot chick, or any other number of movies that have chick in the title . That are vaguely offensive to somebody. No, no, no, not vaguely. Not vaguely . So damn offens ive. It's awful. Fair enough. We did watch the whistle though. I teased, I teased that. Did the whistle kill someone? It's good. You fucking liar. I hate to say it, but you liar. The whistle cannot be good. The whistle's good, you should check it out. I'll check out the whistle. Alright. That's the movie to me. It's a little better. So, Jordan, when we decided to wrap up our podcast with the final live show, you and I chatted a bit about how it would make the most sense for us to cover Alex's last day on air on our last day on air. It would rhyme and would have a fitting thematic overlap. Literary . And I told you that that's what we were gonna do. Right. I meant it at the time, I wasn't lying to you . That was my first thought of what to do, but as soon as you left my apartment, I realized that we couldn't do that because if we did, we'd betray the premise of the show. You can't know what we're covering in advance. So Alex's last day is out. We're not talking about that. We will talk about his last day on Earth. So we will reunite. Whenever whenever the time is right, you choose. I meant if we had another episode coming, I would scold you. But also the more I thought about it, the more it felt like covering Alex's last show is what a normal podcast would do. Not us. And we have never been a normal podcast. God bless us for it. We zig when it makes sense to zag. So we're gonna end this show having not covered Alex's last day on InfoWars . And that's fine. It wasn't a good show . Alex interviewed a Nazi wearing Heil Hitler merch and interviewed Jamie Kennedy about how California' a libersal hellhole. So which one was which ? I think Jamie Kennedy had an Epstein mask behind him on a shelf. It was fucking weird. What is Jamie Kennedy doing on the last InfoWars broadcast? You know what's interesting? I didn't know of all the things that I thought we were gonna discover in a Nazi hellhole, one I didn't fit thought we would discover is how few ideas they have. Just fucking Jamie Kennedy is what you got. Really? I thought it was gonna be like a haha, Alex, you got exed. Because you know the Jamie Kennedy experience, you did the pranks. Oh my god, that's he said you got exed? Didn't he? Yep. Thank you . Thank you for the one voice. Yeah? I watched every episode! I have no idea if you're right or not, but one person saying yes, saved. All we need. All we need. All I've ever needed. I have legit never watched the J. McKennedy experience, but I think I've seen it all. You know ? You've experienced it if you will. Yeah. I I don't want to belabor this, but there was a weird moment on Alex's last uh broadcast where he's complaining about the onion. Uh and so he plays a clip of Tim Heideker. Yeah. From like Tim and Eric. And it's like absurd. Yeah. And then without taking any break, it goes to a sketch that Jamie K ennedy did to introduce Jamie Kennedy. Weird. And I was like, wha everyone's just gonna think that's still the understanding. It's the same sketch, yeah. It was very jarring. And uh Jamie Kennedy was in blackface. Alright. Alright. Yeah, it was it was rough. It was You know what's weird? Of all the things that that makes me think of, it's a Tim and Eric sketch . And that sketch is just a voice in my head going, think about your dad . So I don't know if anybody likes Tim and Eric. But there you go. So Jordan, if we're not gonna cover Alex's last day on air, what are we gonna cover? Alex's first day in hell . If I could find his first show, I would fucking do that. For sure. That would be so good. It would be literary as fuck, if you will. Yeah. You'd be so hopeful. Yeah. I bet this will never go south. No one's ever suing me! So often when we do live shows, I like to try to theme the episode based on the city we're in. Like how in Portland we covered the anniversary of when AC Green finally had sex. It was a very important day. I considered theming things around Chicago, but the first thing I had uh was uh like I thought about like documenting the many times Chicago was supposed to have been nuked and then narrowly survived. Sure. But as I thought about it more, I realized that for the last year or so I've been very subtly teasing that I wanted to do a live show in Atlanta talking about the pyramids and what have you, you know ? I I you know I I realize now that that's never going to happen. We're never gonna get to go to Atlanta and do this show, but I still want to cover that episode, and it works surprisingly well for our purposes here today. So for the next 90 minutes or so, we're in Atlanta . Transport yourself and your mind to the ATL. Put on your fedoras, we're going to church. My mic has a fedora on it in the tattoo. Oh, nice. Scat man. Oh, that's true. You're right. All right. So I'm not gonna tell you exactly why this episode would be better in Atlanta, but I do think that as we go along it'll start to become clear. So today, Jordan, we wrap things up by covering September 9th, 2016 . I'm not opening this up to the audience, but Jordan, do you have any possible thoughts of what the theming could be? No . Like beyond no. I have no clue. I don't even have a guess. Great. I don't even know anything about I don't remember September in twenty sixteen. Um it was yeah, it was hot . I don't know. It was just before it was just before the the election. Frankly, everything pre-COVID is gone. So let's just put it that way. It's all gone. Yeah, brain fog, baby. So one thing that is kind of fun about this is like this is we didn't exist at this point. This is before we had started uh this. So that will be important later. But uh we start things off with Alex talking about I hope nobody ever makes a show about me I hope nobody ever makes a very specific long-running show whose episodes are maybe too long sometimes . I strongly predict that I will be taken seriously into the future . Well, at least I hope it won't be two white guys . And if if they are two white guys, one of them will not have multiple joke tattoos about the show . So anyway, the globalists, uh Alex starts off here. They don't promote the best. Sure. And that's their problem. That is their problem. Bad promotion. Bad promotion. Uh-oh. Uh-oh . This worked. This worked. It worked just a short while. And it will work. It will work. Yeah. Yeah . Don't worry about it. One enthusiastic. Ladies and gentlemen, don't worry. We will edit this part out . Or maybe we won't. Our final episode will sound like it went off without a hitch. Oh, it'll be so smooth. No sound guy will be scrambling to figure out what the fuck is going on here . Not at all. We will not have any people on it . Instead, the listeners at home will go, my god, how could anyone have pulled off a show so easily? See now, but the fun part about this is it makes it easier for me to pretend I'm in Atlanta because now I'm gonna start sweating. This is gonna be this is an immersive experience. I mean, listen, folks, if we don't have clips, I'm gonna have to start trying to remember jokes I did fifteen years ago. And they didn't get me here . Yep. Oh boy . Do you have a one-man show? Oh I was b orn in Texas in nineteen forty-three. I thought oil was to become my life, but then I met a young Bolivian boy named Raul . And Raul wait, I'm sorry? What? Oh Raul, I was just trying to like to give me some a little a little zhuzh to keep the story going in case I'm flagging because we have no other options . And the th the fun part for me too is like I know nothing about how to fix this. No, no, no, no, there's nothing either of us can do. And it's it's interesting because it is the whole show. Yep. It's not like, ooh, you know, I like to watch a lot of cooking shows with my wife, uh, whom I love dearly, and a lot of the times whenever something's going wrong, the chefs will panic and then there'll be a music sting and it'll be like, ah . And then they'll be like, ah, but I'm gonna pivot, and they go and they have a different idea, and then they do that, and then they fail because that's stupid. Right ? And it feels like this would be a good time to pivot, but we do not have a pivot. Wait, I heard that. I heard a little bit of something there. So none of that happened. Woo! Edit it out. Everybody ! None of that happened. No snitching. Don't tell anybody. But also, think a little bit about Raul the next time you're having sex. Oh Raul. Think a little bit about Raul. He's amazing. He's swoo Please let this work. It'll work. It's fine. And the globalist biggest fault in their operations . Is that they do not promote the best and the brightest even in their own guild now. They do it via seniority like it's North Korea or something. And that's why North Korea supplies us with an endless stream of very, very wicked satire, very, very twisted satire, because it is so disconnected. They can't manufacture an automobile. They can't uh e uh basically invent any technology. They have nothing . And they have a toddling third generation hereditary dictator who executes members of his family if during 18-hour government events they look like they gnawed off for thirty seconds. What a wonderful world to live in. North Korea bans sarcasm because Kim Jong-un fears people only agree with him ironically . So schizophrenic, so mentally ill. You just document Cam, I can show TV viewers this article as I was a London Independent . And it's the generals all running around worshiping him like he's a god. Talk about total fruitcake delusional behavior . I mean it's a joke. But that's big government for you. That's that's hereditary power for you. That's passing the reins on to your menions . And that's what we see with Hillary Clinton. The same stumbling around, the same sycophantic behavior, the same worship uh behavior from her aides . She is emblematic of this rotting facade prepar ing to collapse in on itself now. Yeah. Hillary Clinton is uh is North Korea . Hillary's busy. Yeah. Man, I I do wonder I do wonder the idea of North I I think what he means to say is that because North Korea is so fucked up, North Korea brings us the like a satirical concept of how dictatorships could go bad, I suppose, that idea. But now I'm starting to think of like, what if you could dictatorship so bad people could only export satire? And it was just like, oh fuck man, North Korea is a terrible place to live, but their satire is so fucking good! It's Swift again. God, they're so good at satire. Hacking and satire. How would you uh ban sarcasm ? If you I don't know. Exactly. It's perfect. What else is there to say? It would be so great to like have someone try to ban sarcasm? Oh you're banning sarcasm are you? You're gonna get killed, but it's gonna be hilarious . If you're sarcastic towards me, I will kill you. Oh will you? Fuck ! Fuck! But there's something so quaint and cute about the idea of like, oh, we're mad at Hillary. Yeah. You know, like there's something- Those were good times. I rem- I miss being mad at Hillary for this. I miss being mad at Hillary. Yeah. So we get to this next clip and Alex is talking about the the globalists. And uh I was shocked to learn that he doesn't know who's in charge in twenty sixteen. Donald Trump has come out and said, quote, Hillary Clinton is running a global criminal enterprise and spreading terrorism . True words about Hillary Clinton have never been said. She does run a large global criminal enterprise. She is the progenitor or the fount, the fountainhead, the source . With George Soros and a few others. They're the top captains . We not quite sure who the head general is, but we we know who runs the show. They brag about it. We don't know who the king of the ring race are, but we know who they are. Yeah, we do. What the fuck are you talking about? Like Klaus Schwab exists at this point. How do you not know who the king of the ring wraiths is? Yeah. He's the guy riding the dragon. Alex has visions from God. You know who the ring wraiths are. You know who's running this shit. We'll never find out who the main guy is, but eh, let's hope. Look, we got some ideas about middle management. We've nailed them . There's so many options. You could just pick a random person. You could just be like, ah, Bill Gates is the main guy. Why not? Who fucking cares? Nobody's gonna stop you. No! No! And it would work, it would be fine, but I like this honesty. Absolutely. You gotta be clear with it. Honesty. Just because I am the one creating the fictional universe where this bad guy exist s doesn't mean I know who the bad guy is. I haven't decided who we're gonna pin this all on yet, but trust me, I'll have known about it in the past when I tell you. It'll be great. I will backdate this. So Hillary, she's got some health problems. And uh living in the future's wild. She's not dead, and Alex is predicting she's gonna be dead real soon. Right. At this point, ten years ago. Right. But Millie Weaver, uh, who at this point had not become Rainbow Snatch. We haven't even seen her become Rainbow Snatch yet. Nope, but she had captured some video of Hillary, and so that becomes like a major news cycle. All right. Getting into her health, this is from the Association of American Physicians and Surgeons . That's the second largest group in the country. Hillary's health concerns serious say most doctors pulled by the Association of American Physicians and Surgeons. 71% of doctors say Hillary's health concerns are real, serious, and could be disqualifying. Yeah, Dr. Drew . He was an anti-hiller. He just got asked about on a radio show. Also had a CNN show for five, six years, got canceled a week after he said just the drugs she's taking and in the medical records she released . It's just crazy. I mean, I want to talk to her doctors. I want to talk to her. This is dangerous. Yeah, I'd love Alex to talk to Hillary's doctoress . That's not a HIPAA violation right there, huh? So what I like the idea of using Dr. Drew as a reference for a doctor. That's like that's like being a caveman being like Dr. Ug Ug says like fucking Dr. Drew, get the fuck out of here. There's a little bit of a rule that you should have and that is that if it's doctor and then someone's first name . Bad. And also Dr. Drew's first name is David. I know this because I listen to Love Line all the time. So Dr. Drew has two first names? Yeah, David Drew Pinski. We should have seen it all coming. I know. Dishonest. It was all there in the beginning. So Dr. Drew didn't have his show canceled after he spoke out about Hillary's health. Drew's been a guy who's been trapped in a death spiral of media attention since I was in junior high, with his peak being when he and Adam Carolla hosted the radio version of Love Line and simultaneously had the TV version on MTV. He was America's favorite cool doctor, and he got to pretend uh to psychologically analyze the players on the first season of Big Brot her. After Stern went to Satellite Radio, Adam got an opportunity to take over his slot on the West Coast markets, so he left Love Line to create the Adam Corolla show, which kind of sucked, but showed a little bit of promise in the early days. I think. I might have been really young and drunk. You know, a lot of the times when you're living in the present, it can make the past look real fucking stupid. Yep. And liking Adam Carolla looks real fucking stupid. Yep. Yep. But without Adam, Dr. Drew really didn't have a lot going on. He hosted Love Line with other people in the past prior like Poor Man and Ricky Rackman, but no one could deny that Corolla was the juice that made that show work. Drew tried other versions of Love Line with some other Corolla replacements, but made his way onto TV, where he hosted the show Celebrity Rehab, which was likely partially responsible for multiple cast members' deaths . Can we all stop and just appreciate for just a moment? How much do you personally suck if you can't replace Adam Gorolla . It was a different time . There's nobody as good . So for reasons that no one can possibly explain, Celebrity Rehab ran for six seasons , with Drew doing a spin-off season of sex rehab, which was very tasteful and not exploitative at all . Since then, Dr. Drew has done basically anything he can to make a buck, and now is a right-wing culture war podcaster who hides his dumb ideas behind a medical degree. I'd be remiss not to mention that it came out that Drew had uh not disclosed that he accepted two hundred seventy-five thousand dollars in nineteen ninety-nine from Glaxo Smith Klein to promote the antidepressant Well Butrin, which he did heavily on Love Line. For someone who's now making money pretending to be skeptical about companies like Pfizer and Moderna, he sure didn't mind getting rich secretly working with them when he did a show targeted at children. Between this and how much he and Adam would make sexual jokes with minors on their show, you'd think those audiences would pizza gate them by now. Like it looks bad in hindsight. It f sometimes when you when you look at the timeline of our lives, you start thinking, maybe people only gave a shit like ten years ago. Maybe before that everybody was like, bam, what you gonna do? Right. Fourteen years old pregnant? That's the right time . We look far back and we're like, w okay, everyone was on opium back then. Right. You know, or like there's a good stretch. You know, we we tell ourselves that's why no one was paying attention, but we don't have that excuse. Yeah, I mean what is it? So let's let's do the decades, right? You got your tens, everybody's doing coke. You got your twenties, everybody's doing heroin. You got your thirties, everybody's doing coke again. You got your forties, everybody's doing a lot of uh brand new psychedelics. You got your fifties, everybody's just smoking weed because they got bored again. Then you got your sixties, everybody's getting real with it. Everybody's fucking each other. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. What? All of these have been drugs, and then they just got real with it. Yeah. What does that mean? Charles Manson? Hashish ? What was the drug that was getting real? Uh that was the good LSD. That was when they raised LSD to another level. Then you got your 70s, they uh went back to Coke and the 80s with the Coke and then the 90s with the MDMA, and then you got the early thousands with the better MDMA, and then you've got now where we just read the news and feel bad. We need a new I hate to sound like human drugs, but we need a new drug. We need new drugs. That's our problem. Whoa won't make a stick! So Alex brought up the Association of American Physicians and Surgeons, who are apparently the second largest group in the country. I assume he means they're the second largest doctor group in the country, but that's definitely not true. It has a name that makes you think that it's the one definitive group of physicians and surgeons, but in reality, the AAPS is a right-wing political advocacy group that started in 1943 as a means of fighting against the Wagner Murray Dingle Bill, which was written . Poor poor every single human being who's ever had the last name Dingle. Sorry. Yeah. You lose . We're adults. Like if you you couldn't, if you heard like oh the blank dingle civil rights bill, you'd be like, come on, man. Get a better guy. No, I think get a better guy to free the slaves. Come on, man. I I think you could support it, but also be like, hee hee . That's fine. But anyway, that bill was written to give Americans uh more Sure. The bill itself was a non-starter and it never made it out of committee, but the fear that it 's like a lot of dingles. Yeah. But the fear that it caused in the insurance and business owner communities were enough to cause a big old freak out, where the American Medical Association opposed the bill, but they weren't extreme enough about their opposition, thus leading to the AAPS being created as an alternative. They have uh heavy overlap and memberships and leadership with the John Birch Society and the Eagle Forum over the years, and they're basically just a right-wing political hack group. That sounds right. They've also taken money from Philip Morris to help fight against smoking bans uh and and stop the government from doctors against smoking bans. No you can you can find their op eds that are like it's smoking so bad like I was a pack a day at least smoker and I came around on smoking bands. Like they have to be getting paid. So much. My wife and I we smoked for years and even both of us the other night were like, man, thank God we don' They believe that there's a link between vaccines and autism and deny that there's a link between HIV and AIDS. And in 2008, they published an anonymous paper accusing Obama of winning the election by hypnotizing the public . Alright. Part before you before you get like part of their argument was that Obama's logo quite uh quote might just be the letter O, but it also resembles a crystal ball, the favorite of hypnotists. Shit. Yeah. Shit! I hadn't considered that . Fuck! Oh god damn it. Put that in your dingle and smoke it. That's where we get real. So, like thinking that Obama hypnotized the United States, that sounds like fairly normal political discussion in 2026. But it's important to remember that was rightly understood to be embarrassing in 2008 . Anyway, they loved Rand and uh Ron Paul and uh they did their part to attack Hillary in the twenty sixteen election, and Alex is presenting them as one of the most important medical outlets in the country in order to further that. But it's uh a bunch of nonsense, they're hacks. I just love the idea of like evil doctors coming through medical school and and then being like trying to drill into the like the fucking Hippocrat first do no harm and the whole time they're just like motherfucker. I'm gonna keep people smoking inside. It is not the government's place to bet. First do no harm. Johns Hopkins University. First, do no harm. Second, be a dick. Third, do a little harm. So I went to spending a lot of this show talking about Hillary, and it would surprise you to learn that it also apparently is not allowed. Uh people are not allowed to talk about Hillary in the media. How dare you on a radio show in America talk about the Witch King Hillary Clinton. You just do not believe it. And that's why there were hundreds and hundreds and hundreds I mean I can't count them all up. I I typed in um Alex Jones, Hillary Clinton earpiece, and there were over a thousand articles that popped up. I just looked at ten or so this morning and they had the Chicago Tribune uh saying that I'm this wicked, evil, dark, horrible devil, and then I'm just so horrible, and then I must be stopped, and how dare Donald Trump Jr. tweet out our story and how evil Matt Drudge is and blah, blah, blah. How could we question her? This is just the most outrageous thing ever. And and I I I'm just making this article 'cause it was just one of the ones I looked at . Because it's all nothing but talking points they've put out regurgitated by this guy. So Alex has put out this story about Hillary Clinton's health and and uh also uh made allegations that she's using in your piece. Right. That is based on a tweet that he saw from James Woods . So Alex did a sort of thing. He was a family guy, so Yeah. Was I I think I think he's been some other stuff, like trouble. But Oh, he was Hades . Sure. Yeah. So anyway, be leaving that demonic . James Woods facts. So Alex saw that tweet. He wrote an article about it, or someone wrote an article about it, and now ever like there's people who are talking about him writing an article about it, like this guy in the Chicago Tribune, and now Alex is doing his show complaining about people complaining about him covering something that he read in a James Woods tweet. Right. It's exhausting. And it's good radio is what it is. Yeah. Yeah. He's very mad about this uh Tribune writer and uh you know, it might come back up. Oh yeah? Yeah. It might. Oh. I'm not making any promises. Okay. I mean if it's not I mean if you're foreshadowing, that's fine. But if you're not, then we can also accept that you're not foreshadowing. We'll see . But I will say that it's appropriate that he is a Chicago Tribune writer, right? Right. So um Alex has found another article. First of all, Kim Jong un is banned sarcasm. Uh people are mad about his illness. Oh Hazzy. Yay. But oh hazzy. Oh there's no response to that. I've gotta kill you. So Alex has found another article about how uh we're so close to nuclear war. I want to just take you back to an article out of the UK Sun uh just two days ago that I read the headline of, but never even covered. And it's over a 20-page article with all these top scientists, all these top historians, uh sociologists, psychologists, military experts. By the way, our Pentagon concurs with these reports, saying the planet is closer to catastrophic World War three than at any time for sixty years experts warn, and it doesn't look good for Britain or America if it does kick off. And this is a big detailed report that's excellent. That I wanna go over and probably shoot a special report next week on and get some of these guests on just to look at all the trigger points and you know the things that are expanding and happening around the planet because you know we do our research here, but it's good to see it in a big detailed uh report like this . And some people will say, Well we haven't had a nuclear war yet, so what's the problem? That's a good point. Well, the problem is it's like having a say a 65-year-old building. That's how long we've had the modern atomic age. And we haven't had a big fire yet. Well, statistics show the longer the building's there, the better a chance it's gonna end up having a fire. Wait . Just because of time going by. Statistically, there's a better chance over a long period of time. Does it have a better chance or a worse chance of being struck by lightning? I think it has a better chance of being struck by lightning than it is, because it's more time. No, I I see same thing. And you look at all this , the world is getting more dangerous. Right . It is. Not less dangerous. Sure. I think the fire in the building thing is about like codes. I think that's about the regulation that Alex takes. But let's leave that aside. So I I like that your response was that there's no way he read that article because you are right. For sure . So that Sun article is not a comprehensive twenty something page breakdown of a possible World War three. However, one of the sources in that article that it cites is a 25-page report that had recently been released by the Atlantic Council. So Alex is pretending he read that when he just scrolled through all these pictures in a British tabloid. Right. Yeah. That's the same basic thing. Incidentally, the Atlantic Council report was mostly about how a world war could break out because of Putin's aspirations to expand his sphere of influence in neighboring countries at a time when NATO was distracted or weakened internationally. Okay. All of which Alex supports. Sure . But I want to talk about lightning and old trees. Alright, let's hear this. This is a stupid point that Alex makes, but it actually highlights a fundamental problem with the way he thinks. Assuming that they're all in the same area and subject to the same weather conditions, every tree is just as likely to be struck by lightning as any other. If there's a variable that matters more than age, it's probably height, but not all trees grow taller over time. Each lightning strike is an independent event, and whether or not you've been hit by lightning in the past doesn't really impact your chances next time. Being hit doesn't make you more or less likely to be hit in the future because storms aren't keeping score . They don't check you off the list . I rest I respect what you're saying, but the sky does look at me pretty mean sometimes. Sure, I know, and sometimes it looks like a pony or something like that. But it's got like it's for me. Mm-hmm . Sure. Yeah. Okay, I'll sit down. Have someone come talk to you. No, I'm calm. Having been hit by lightning is something that your chances increase with over time. The longer you live, the more likely it is that anything can have happened in the time that you've been alive, but this is a meaningless and unhelpful kind of probability. It can be helpful at a population level, but it's not good when you're getting a little more zoomed in. For example, in terms of the general population, it's more likely that someone who's 40 will have ridden a horse than someone who's five. That's not because there's anything about aging that correlates to horse riding. You just have more opportunities to ride horses as you go through life. What you're saying is we need to find smaller horses for five-year-olds. I'm listening. Alright. Okay. I've got some time now. I'm open to businesses. Let's breed some tiny horses. How small can we make a horse is the question that I feel like we're all afraid to ask. I've got people working around the clock. That's w I already work around the clock. Oh If you see a 13-year-old who's never ridden a horse, you know nothing about whether or not they are going to in the future. That's what I'm saying. Similarly, a tree that is older has had more time during which it could have been struck by lightning, but that doesn't tell you anything about how likely it is to be struck in the future. In Alex's example, we've been living with nuclear weapons for sixty years, which is a lot of time for there, you know, to have been a nuclear war. Sure. We would be more likely to have encountered nuclear war than a civilization that's only had nukes for a year. But this is useless as inform ation . The thing to understand is uh that this thinking, the kind of thinking that Alex is presenting, it only makes sense if you view the end result as inevitable. If all trees are eventually going to be hit by lightning, that changes the way you interpret this information. If all trees eventually get hit by lightning And we should be grateful to God for that. Yes . Everyone, bow your heads. This is the premise that Alex is sneaking into his argument that he knows that his audience isn't going to pick up on. In order for what he's saying to mean anything, he needs to believe that an apocalyptic nuclear war is inevitable. If you understand these hidden premises and implications of the things that Alex is saying, it makes it much easier to see how clear of an idiot and a deceptive liar he is. Yeah. So anyway, I just like that kind of I like I like trees. You know, to to revisit something, I like here's what I like being told. I like being told that experts thinks th think we're closer to World War III than at any point in the last sixty years. Which is accurate, but because it would be insane if somebody was like, Hey man, two hundred years ago, we were so close to World War Three. Yeah, or like before World War Two in between. It's right there. It's right there. I know World War Two hasn't happened yet, but you fuckers are gonna do the three afterwards right away. Yeah. Are you gonna jump? Yeah, that's crazy. Get ahead of yourself. Go for three nuts. Lunch, uh, dinner, dessert. It's like world wars are basically chopped. Mm-hmm . So look, there's so many plants, there's so many nuclear plants in the world that like they're all gonna eventually something's gonna happen eventually. We're all gonna blow up. And now we've got four hundred and forty something power producing nuclear reactors and hundreds and hundreds, several hundred other research reactors. I mean, I go to the Department of Energy's own website and and you can also go to the International Atomic Energy Agency website, and it doesn't even list two nuclear reactors that are in Austin. So when I say there's 700 reactors, that's not counting submarines. Add 300, 400 more onto that. Who knows how many reactors are. Not counting submarines. Who knows ? And here's the difference . They're supposed to shut these plants down after 30, 40 years, they're not shutting them down, and they just don't even seem to care now. They're turning the alarms off all over the country. So that when they le ak radiation by law, the alarms would go off. Well that scares the public. So now they just turn the alarms off. Smart. So bottom line, September is preparedness month. Everybody needs to get prepared. That way it's a win-win if bad things don't happen and there isn't economic crisis or the re aren't larger wars or whatever. Hey, you got insurance you can eat, high quality affordable foods. Uh you're drinking water through great water purification systems already. Uh not just for a disaster, but just for the ongoing uh glyphosates and all the rest of the trash. Sure. We've got specials. The biggest we've ever run. Biggest. These are big-ass specials. You gotta get this food because there's fucking submarines out there. Not counting the submar ines. No one's co- Hillary won't count the submarines. I think so here's what's fun about this, right? So I think a lot of times when conspiracy people do stuff like that where they're like, ah, they're just walking around there turning the lights off. They don't stop and think about how truly concerning some behavior would be. Like this person is aware, like it embody this person. Oh, this reactor. That's a more concerning person than the person who's going to kill you, right? Isn't that more terrifying than somebody somebody who's like, ah, I'm gonna stab you, you're at least like, I know where we stand . The the nuclear uh reaction. I think I fucked up guys. I'll be somewhere else. Look, the beeping is annoying. I'm just gonna turn it off. The beeping is annoying. That's fair. Yeah. We've all had a fire alarm go off and been like, well, I guess we'll just die then. Smoke detector, don't replace those batteries. I didn't know. Beeping's fucking annoying. Takes me back to the old days of Love Line, back when Alec uh Adam and uh Drew would get distracted by someone having a smoke alarm beeping in the background. Anyone else remember that? Those days? Those were good days. Who am I gonna get to replace Corolla ? Yeah. Oh, and his uh the man we when I was young, I thought that accordion him being so mad about accordions was so funny. Anyway. These are very specific references. Yep. And they are not working . Two or three people. Yep. So uh we you know our show is coming to an end. That's true. But in some ways, all of us are immortal . Do you know that? Sure. I'm not going to start a fight about it now. Well, Alex is gonna talk to you a little bit about it here in this next clip. And I just didn't want you to come into it cold. Good. I'm gonna live forever through my project . Big secret . We now take you live to the Central Texas Command Center and the heart of the resistance. You're listening to Alex Jones . All my ancestors are alive with me now. In spirit, when DNA, and in this body. That's the magic of God's creation. Everything comes in threes. You have a spirit, you have an individual wife, and then you have the genetic collective. One more of the entity you are. What? It's amazing . It's beyond any science fiction you can imagine. And you're not gonna read what you just heard in any book. I've studied history . I've studied epigenetics. I've studied wide spectrum information, and let me tell you, that is what's happening. That's what's going on. Hell yeah, man. What's going on? I don't know . No, no, no, no, but it is what's happening. You remember how you were talking about like the sixties or seventies before they get into it? That's what this is. That's what it gets. That feels real. So I mean like you've got you got your spirit. Alright, you got your spirit. I think that it's really funny that Alex didn't really take the time to think of what the three things are before he started the sentence. I appreciate I appreciate the confidence with which you begin, though. You're like, everything boils down to threes, and then there's gotta be the voice in the back of the bed that goes, fuck. I had one at best loaded in the chamber. I'm about to reveal to you the secrets of the universe, I'm immortal. Fuuuuu. Alright. We got one.. Okay We second one coming through. All right. Woo . Number three. It's gonna be too hard to. Esot eric . So you have a spirit, and you have an individual life. Sure. Those two pretty straight forward. They feel like the same thing. Well, not real I think there's a way you could you could uh I'm not interested in arguing because things really fall apart with the third one. Yeah, that's the problem. You have a genetic collective of the entity that you are. That was the problem. Is that the board? The genet Can we the genet ic collective of the entity you are. What the fuck? The genetic collective. I love the idea that in 2016, like someone was listening to this and being like blowing my fucking mind . That guy knows stuff. So I was thinking about it, and this seems like the darkest idea that I could imagine. Okay. If you love your family and you have a great relationship with them, then I guess it's kind of fun to imagine that your genes that they passed on to you are literally them and they live on in you. But not collective. Yeah, but not everyone's family is good. If you have an abusive parent, Alex's ideology requires you never be able to get free from them. No matter what you do to grow and become your own person, your DNA is them living on through you and giving them immortality. You're not the entity you are. No, you can't be. No, you are they. Even beyond this monstrous idea, the idea that your like children give you immortality is a very short walk from eugenics. If some people are fundamentally evil, as Alex explicitly believes, then why would you want them to become immortal through their children? Only good people should be allowed to reproduce. Is what this leads to very easy. You know what? Now that I hear you say it out loud . No, cause cause when I was thinking it, oh, only good people should reproduce. It sounded good. But then you say it out loud in front of all these people and I go, oh maybe there's a bad idea here. Yeah kind of sounds kinda sounds better when you talk about the genetic entity. This could go wrong. Colony mind. This could go wrong. Who gets decided to decide who's good? Ah, and yum dead. Mm-hmm . Also, if you are your genetics and you live on through your genes, what about like other stuff that has your DNA in it? Do what do you mean socks? No, li es I guess I do . Alright. That one deserves one mug. I'll give I get one mug. This is our last show. Thank you. Cheeky? I want to call you cheeky. Yeah. Like, but if you give someone an organ, do you like become them because your DNA is then in them? Oh fuck, I feel like I saw a movie that was that. I think I think yeah. If you donate blood, have you colonized a bunch of genetic collectives with like your blood going in? I feel like that's something we could find out. How? I be I'm gonna give a bunch of people my blood and see if I can control them. What do you not understand about this experiment? It is very straightforward. I have don ated a ton of blood and sold my plasma, and I can't control anybody. Yes, you don't know that though, because you don't know who got your blood and plasma. We got people here. Open up your veins, shit's gonna get weird . How can I argue- to say that? How can I argue with the scientific method? It it's it's fun to joke around about all this stuff and the things Alex is saying, but the bottom line is that no one believes any of this shit unless they're trying to promote racism while pretending that they're not racist. There's an extra layer to that clip that I found really fun, which is that Alex is saying that you're not gonna find any of this information in a book . But he's also saying that he found this wisdom through study. Sure. The contradiction here arises from the fact that Alex is an idiot and he doesn't know the difference between studying and making shit up. So I was reading this book. Right. Right. And that thing made me think of something completely different. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're never gonna read that in the book . But that studying. I'm not gonna write it down though. You studied this book by thinking about other things. I genuinely can't understand your words right now. So to do that, I would need to read a book. So imagine a tree. It's old. There's a storm coming . When does the train arrive in Detroit? No No, sixty miles an hour . So Alex is talking about uh how uh like people's families, they're off limits. Like he's not gonna attack this Chicago Tribune guy's That's very kind of him, yeah, that's super nice. I'm sure that sticks for the rest of his career. Yeah, totally, totally, totally. And even in modern American unwritten jurisprudence . Written jurisprudence. You don't target people's families for political assassination, and you don't even target families. Wives, daughters, sons , if they're not politically involved. It would be weird if you don't go after people that are not in the arena . And there's a good reason for that . There is. You start going to people's families . Gloves come off real fast. And the veneer civilization peels away . Like tiles on the bottom of a spacecraft coming in. Is that what it's like? Through the atmosphere. Does that sound like vitriol by former US generals and by current NATO commanders, including the commander of NATO, and I have seen statements by former CIA directors and others, that is the stuff of third world dictator stuff. In fact , it's just not done in history to shoot your mouth off about how you kill people and you're powerful and you're good at killing people and I came and we saw it who died. Obama, Hillary, they've all said the same amateur stuff. It's weird to live in the future. With your bare hands, you don't talk about it, you don't brag about it, you don't get into it, because it's bad luck. It's stupid. And it's it's it's it's really degrading uh to yourself and everybody else. So wow. Yeah. You know what? That's a really good point. Yep. That's a real good point. And Alex is pretty lucky that we actually do believe some of the things that he said I mean it is it is funny to be living in the world that a guy created because even though he hit the nail on the head, he just couldn't do it. Yeah. Just couldn't do it. It's also fun that Alex thinks that bragging about murder uh is uh d degrading because it gives me the opportunity to play one of my favorite clips ever. There we go. Here's Alex from 2020. There it is. And I don't want to ever see Wolf Blitzer hurt because Wolf Blitzer is a human maggot . I mean, like you really want to start a fight with us. You just can't help it. Yeah, you do, don't you? You're begging for it. You're begging. You're begging to get your gut stomped out hard . And I don't know Wolf you ever had your gut stomped out So you not that I've ever stomped anybody's guts out. Actually I have a couple times, it's not too much . Takes people a long time to die after you stomp their guts up. Yeah, that's pretty degrading. Yeah, well, there's something about it. But it's not quite as degrading as one of the greatest moments of my life, which is when the plaintiff's lawyers in the Sandy Hook case played that clip for Alex and then asked him under oath if he'd ever killed anyone. Yep . Just there are there are some th ings There are some things that will uh never exist . But that is something that exists because of you, Dave. Probably. So every time all of you are worried about monsters in the dark, just remember, Dan has a question for you. And it's have you ever actually killed anybody? No. Because I think you're full of shit. Now you're under oath, monster. No, I'm under your bed . So Alex is talking, you know, you don't brag about killing people. Uh and that he's just off on this weird rant about how everyone's judging him and being too mean about his Hillary coverage. And so he has a little bit of a plan. Mm-hmm. One of their favorite ways to kill somebody is to have obviously a stunt driver slam into somebody and take 'em out. Or they kill you, put you in a car and then hit you with a truck. Naturally. I've actually been told by security analysts and folks we've had to do securities checks and sweeps. We've had to go to that level enough that I'm even scared of 'em taking me out, but I'm not gonna make it easy. And I want to document it too. So we've got a lot of counter surveillance. These people freak out we actually send people to their house. You know it's like, oh you're gonna come to my house? Well then when you go to your house let's leave it . We're gonna drop by too, see ? That's how that works. Really sounds like Alex is admitting to being involved in elaborate and terrifying harassment campaigns. Sure feels like that. He loves to say that he never sent anyone to anyone's house and that the lawsuits against him are so unfair, but that clip is literally him bragging about doing the same stuff he's accused of doing. Yeah. He can call it counter-surveillance all he wants, but it doesn't change the fact of what he did. And this, things like that clip, are why Alex could never have allowed those Sandy Hook cases to go to trial on the merits. He forced the courts to default him because of shit like that being widely available. So that's a good thing to remember. Yeah. Uh, because he probably could be found responsible and guilty for way worse than he was. It would be an insane world to live in where a jury was like, actually , this guy got it. He ended up with like a billion plus dollars and I think he got off light. I agree. If a jury was allowed to actually deal with it directly, they would be like we're kicking this to the criminal courts. Yeah. I mean it's it's it's hard not to imagine a problem being solved with a truck sent from a catapult. You think about the beginning of that clip with the case. I'm thinking about it j I'm thinking about it actually I I'm just excited to try and build a trebuch So I'm gonna skip this next clip because it's just Alex bragging about being involved in a soft coup that overthrew the government in twenty eleven. Sure. And eh, we've heard. That wasn't as good as his actual coup that overthrew the government in twenty twenty Right. The 2011 one was just him hanging out with Tea Party people. Yeah, exactly. But we have to we have to move forward to a delightful clip that I think I have some really deep thoughts about. Okay. Resistance to tyrants is obedience to God. It's Alex Jones. Or the soul. Matthew Merlmagger. God bless him poets tell how far Joe fair and left his living cheap hotel as his wife Cle learned so the story and we're told I don't need your prayers is true Lebanon . Alright. Alright. Sorry. I gotta do a zone there. He only did what he had to do. I can't do the Merle Hagard ha. No. I described it as country Muppet, and I stand by that. It's why he lives forever. Yeah. So I was thinking about this as I was preparing this episode, and I think this is that clip embodies one of the reasons that this is a good last episode for us. And that is it it it contains what Alex has lost. He's lost the music. Yeah. Like in the present day, he doesn't feel melancholy. I felt like 15 of you go, hmm I think fuck off. I think I think some of the applause was for they're thrilled he's lost the music . I'm sure there's plenty of that. But like that that spirit is like freedom. You know, that's the like, yeah, I'm fuck I need Merle Hagar for my soul. Yeah. And that's just gone. Yeah, there's something about like in in I think and I think in a lot of these guys' minds, there's this vi image of themselves where it like driving a motorcycle with that helmet on. You know, like I'm finally going to be cool. Like that's their heaven. Like finally, I've learned how to drive a motorcycle. And the Alex is wearing a shirt that says if you're reading this, uh my wife fell off. Exactly. But it says the bitch fell off, but it has like at and then an exclamation point and like a star. Yeah. I'm saving my uh bitches for later. That'll make sense in a little bit. Hold on. Oh hold on. I'm saving my bitches for later. So dumb . So Alex uh he's really complaining a bunch about this this editorial writer. Sure. And he's uh no one will come on my show, no one none of my critics will talk to me. Every day we're gonna pick one of these people. People ask, it's like it's a criticism, why don't you have opposition on? Why don't you have people with opposing views? Can't handle it ? They will not come on, none of them, because they all just get talking points and regurgitate it over and over and over again. And you read the article he wrote, it's all whatever the PR boss of Hillary wrote weeks ago that she put out in that uh old conservative speech . I mean it's written like a seventh grader. Was you know taught about some evil monster it saw under the bed or something. Okay . And so he comes back with ha . That's all these narcissists have. Ha ! Ha ! A serious discussion. That's a good one. Ha ha ha. I should I should clarify. Alex is reading an email exchange between himself and the columnist. He is invited while the show's response is Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Yeah. Okay. What a dumbass . I do have some thoughts on how the Obama administration used fluoride in my toothpaste to turn me into a mindless lib zombie. Well, I mean Harvard Speaker is saying it causes a massive IQ reduction. And the White House Science Bar wrote admitting they put it in the water to blow your IQ called Ecoscience. It's free online. Read it. He goes, but I'm saving that for more credible outlook. Are these all part of the incredible? My answer to your question is no, absolutely not. Not ever. Not in my career, depending on it. So cowardly. This feels really sad . Uh it it looks like Alex puffing his chest out and uh being a big strong boy, but anyone who's worked in any kind of media before would ignore an email like that. That reporter is making fun of Alex's invitation, and Alex seems like he's getting pretty pissed off about it, which comes off as very weak. It sounds like something that North Korea would create about satire. Ooh. They would nail it. They would really hit this one on the head. Illegal. Mm-hmm. So we've mentioned on the show before that Daria, Alex's assistant, emailed us to say that Alex would come on our show if we wanted him to. But I want to make one thing clear. That invitation never went the other direction. He was actually you actually no this is a story that I'm finally willing to tell. Oh shit. No. No. He's up . This is real. I said to Dan, Daria emailed us. I would like to reply back. Fuck you, die . And Dan said that would not be professional. To which I agree, but also Daria , fuck you, die . I really think that she would know that that would be our feeling, even without the response. I think a lot of people would w I think uh let me say this to you about the world. I think a lot of people know how I feel about a lot of shit, but I still like telling you to fuck off. That's fair . Yes. Fair. So there's that. Yeah. I don't know if we ever would have gone on if there was an invitation, but I just want to be clear, it never, like he's saying none of his critics would come on. There's a chance we might have. I mean we would have been like you would have just It would have been a different time. Yeah. But we also didn't exist in 2016, so you can't be mad at him for not inviting us. Yep. So Alex is also mad at Rachel Mad ow, uh calls her Chris Hayes and uh it's a bunch of dumb bullshit because she made a joke on her show about how Alex is selling selenium as a cure for Zika. Sh uh it's exhausting. Zika. Yeah. Oh man, those were the days. Yeah. Those are the days. Those big headed children. We were Oh, we haven't moved on I'm gonna leave that there . So we now get to the part of the show where it becomes clear why I wanted to do this show in Atlanta and uh I hope you enjoy. Uh continu ing. Quote ludicrous. Boom ! Hillary, get out the way. Get out the way. Hillary get out the way. I'm not into vulgarity, but I really want to do a music video with ludicrous and uh bitch move out the way because it really does detail it all. I mean, just get out the way, get out the way, go get your stretcher, have another seizure, whatever it is you do with Uma, and just sail off across the pus-filled ocean of green globules uh that you so love. And just leave us alone. We don't want to be poor. We don't want to be stupid. We don't want to be controlled by you. We want fast cars. We want guns. We want private property. We want America. Get out the way. Get out the wave. Bah Wait. Who was that last word? Bah . It was just exasperation. Move rich I can see why. I want guns. At no point in time did ludicrous go like what does Alex think about while I'm writing this? Yeah. I mean uh yeah and, uh d I I think Lou Ludacris, obviously, probably too busy filming was Crash in 2016 ? I don't know. Anyway Was crash in 2016 . The great I'm sorry? Did you say 2005? I gotta go. Somebody, we have got we have got multiple. Here's the thing about answers to this question: we have 2004, we have 2005 . Doesn't matter, both of those make me feel like I'm about to die. I'm on the edge of death. I feel that's too long ago. You're an old tree. So Alex uh Alex likes ludicrous. I who does it? Yeah. Welcome to Atlanta where the play is played. That's Jermaine Dupree in the in the chorus of Welcome to Atlanta. Here's my feeling about Welcome to Atlanta. Yeah. What is your this is the question that everybody's here for. What is your feeling about Welcome to Atlanta? The All-Cities remix is better, but worse . Ludacris's version, the Welcome to Atlanta version is very strong. But the All Cities remix has Murphy Lee and the St. Lunatics, and it includes one of my favorite lyrics of all time, I'm so St. Louis, you can ask my tattooist. Yeah . It was like in the water boy, and they said, you can do it! Yeah. Back to Rob Schneider. Can't argue. Yeah . So anyway, Ludacris welcomed us to Atlanta. Yes. Told us about the big uh the big off the heasy at the big one tweezy. True. All the great strip clubs. Again, that's Jermaine Dupree's lyrics. Do I only You don't actually like ludicrous. No. You you like the Fast and the Furious films like the rest of us. No, I like Luda. I like I I enjoy him he's got a good sense of humor. Anyway, Alex Lowe Are you dating him? He's thoughtful . He remembers annivers aries . So Alex is uh really thinking about this ludicrous song. He's loving move bitch and uh so he's feeling it. He pontificates. I'll be honest, I I don't listen to a lot of hip hop and rap, but but when it's good, it's some of it is totally mindless, just like most rock and roll or stuff but I tell the there's some good stuff out there. Uh its just came to me a few month ago, I hadn't heard it in over a decade. Bitch move out the way , uh is the way to go. I mean it's just everybody gets it. Move out the way . I mean, I'm going down the highway, at least a hundred, you're doing fifty. In fact, it hit me this morning . It hit me this morning. Winston Smith being tortured in the allegory of 1984 by O'Brien at the Ministry of Love, where they torture you to death. Winston says the ability to be free is to be able to say two plus two equals four. What? And O'Brien goes, you're absolutely damn right it is, by the time we screw your brain up and turn you into a mindless idiot, you won't be able to even have a coherent thought . But it's beyond that . People that drive in the fast l ane the ability to only drive in the fast lane when you're passing is civilization. If I drive by the people, it'll be doing fifty-five and a 70 in the fast lane with three, four lanes of traffic, sure not having to drive in the slow lane because they're in the fast lane and I look at them and they always look completely blitzed out of their mind. No, I understand . Old white guy, Hispanic lady, black lady, I don't care. What? And they're just . I mean, they have no idea what planet they're on. And I'm telling you, it's a good thing the drivers are in the fast lane. They think, oh, there's an open lane over there. I'm just gonna go drive over into that. I wish the police and I'm not in a giving tickets and step a bus I want thousand dollar fines if you are in the fast l ane and you're not passing, I want thousand dollar fin es. In fact, I want you arrested . Because you are spiritually getting in the way . Behind me say Wow. That's something . That started with ludicrous. Here's what I see. Here's what I see. What I see in my head right now is a situation where we're full on a pocalypse nowing with ludicrous in the fucking and Alex Jones is just like oh man you don't understand move bitch get out the way it's like a whole fucking universe that you're explaining that's expanding my mind, bitch. Get out the way, because getting out of the way is what all the stuff is, man. It's all in the way, man. If you if you you should be arrested if you don't follow Ludacris' rules. And then Luda is like, I am at a strip club . End of the song story. Sir, you're under arrest. What did I do? man, it's all about getting out of the way if you're a bitch, man! No, I'm sorry, you did not check what her fant astic was. Ooh . You're doing five years for that . You did not lick from the head to the toes. You gotta accept the sentence. So I thought Alex was a libertarian type, but he wants me to get arrested for like crimes against civilization if you drive in the passing way. Sure. As somebody who's recently got into driving as an adult, I get what Alex is saying . Get out the way, bitch! But I have a hard time relating to how angry he is about it. Yeah. Sure, you're not supposed to drive slow in the passing lane, and it can be dangerous, but there's already laws about that. I get what Alex is meaning to say, and I've said something similar recently. It's an idea about how traffic is a fascinating microcosm of life where everyone's working together to achieve the same goal. Going where you're going. We aren't all going to the same place, but we're all driving on the roads because we're trying to get somewhere, and you getting to where you're going safely and efficiently makes it easier for me to get where I'm going safely and efficiently. Following the rules of the road is the best system to get people where they're going. So when someone doesn't follow the rules of the road, it feels like anti-social behavior. All of that's fine. And metaphorically, I get the point Alex is making about civilization and the fast lane. Where it falls apart though is that it doesn't feel like Alex remembers he's making a metaphor . No, he's very directly and literally mad about this. It just seems like he's mad about traffic. He's mad about traffic. The other problem is that the metaphor doesn't really work well in broad applications. For example, the rules of the road are important because there are only like three lanes in a particular road. To make sure that everyone can use them effectively, you need you didn't't like not can block one of the roads and someone needs to pass a slow car. But like life doesn't work that way. There aren't three lanes. There are no rules of the road because we're not on the same road. I get what that'sally accident the deepest thing you've ever said in your entire life. There's no rules of the road because we're not all on the same road. That's some Dr. Drew shit, right? Yeah. Blaxo Smith Klein paid me to say that. So I get basically what's going on here and I love it. And it speaks to the Alex that I miss. Alex remembered the ludicrous song, and he had a thought about how he could apply those lyrics to his own shit. It's a dumb thought, but he get like he can't get over how deep it feels to him, so it becomes something of an obsession, which ends up being fueled by people making memes of him yelling ludicrous lyrics. It's amazing. It's a great cycle. It's kind of fun. Yeah, it is . It is the circle of life in a way. And that's that's really why meditating on this is really the it's so much more appropriate than than Alex's last day on air. You know? Yeah, I don't know. This is I don't I don't want to say that this is like accident ally meaningful . I didn't accidentally make this episode . I meant something that Alex said, but you know what? I take it back , you're correct. Wait, what? This is unpurposefully meaningful. What was Alex's accidentally meaningful thing? I just think bitches should get out of the way. Whoa ! So Alex has a feeling, and that is that this ludicrous song is basically like the Bible. Yeah. And I think that's not unlike the Bible. The the parable of the talents, you know, you give a guy ten talents and then he gets ten bitches out the way. Right? You give a guy three talents, but he can't get ten bitches out the way. You only give him three talents.. You give him talk So he needs to go to the strip club again. Shook Knight is there. I don't know why. Jesus is a weird dude in my Bible, but whatever. You know what I say to the guy with three talents? What? Roll out . So anyway . Ludicrous is like the Bible. Boom. That ludicrous song is almost a Bible study. Maybe you could like play that song to racial manna at Camp X-ray and she would out of the fifty thousand times she heard it finally get it. We want you to move out the way. Move out the way. Move out the way. You got it? Move out the way. Lots of people to move out of the way . Seems a little sacrilegious to say that the lyrics of move bitch are almost a Bible study . I I appreciate the concept of like a wizard of Oz where the wicked witch is like, nobody's ever said move, bitch, get out the way! And then melts. Oh, it's my kryptonite. Someone yellow move. Mad Ow is no chance. So here's some of the lyrics that I think wouldn't be in the Bible. Yeah, let's hear it . Which ones? I'm doing 100 on the highway, so you do the speed limit, get up the f get the fuck out of my way. Sure. I'm D-U-I, hardly ever caught sober and you're about to get run the fuck over. Sure . You see, this is somebody who has not read the Proverbs. When King Solomon himself said that driving drunk uh a carriage of motherfuckers . My horse is drunk. Drinking drinking communion wise I don't know. It's too late now. So here's another lyric. Yeah, let's go. Young and successful, a sex symbol. Now bitches want of me to fuck 'em. True, true. Hold up, wait up, shorty. Uh-oh, what's up? Getting my dick sucked . You're right. Ludacris is one of the great poets of That was not ludicrous. That line doesn't feel very biblical, particularly because it was delivered by featured artist and convicted rapist mystical. Hmm . Who pled guilty to sexual battery and extortion charges about a year after this song came out, which is a decade before Alex is talking about it on air here. Anyway, it's like a Bible study. Wow . Wow. Yeah. There's a lot of fucked up people in the Bible. No, that's true. Thank you for confirming that. You know what? When you you know when you get right down to it. When you get right down to it. Mystical. Yeah. He he's a right there. He's fits in. Do you know what's crazy about it? Mystical . He's a mystical after my own heart, if you will. I think that's uh yeah. All right. So we go on a bit and like Alex is just complaining and whining about Rachel Maddow complaining about him. Sure. And then complaining about all of these like the the uh editorial columnist uh who is complaining about him. And for some reason he decides to keep reading that rejection email. I like that. It's personal. It's so sad . So he sends us this email back. We're very nice. We said we'd like to have you on. This is just an hour ago. He says, ha. Well, I got laughed at. I'm back in junior high. I'm gonna go cry to my mommy. The other kids at the playground laughed at me. Boom boy huh oh he oh that's very intellectful ha a serious discussion that's a good one so yeah he he's reading this this this email from a guy who's like I don't want to talk to you and it just makes it bums me out. It seems it's so obvious in hindsight how desperate he is for this guy to talk more about him. Yeah. And to me, I just was like, oh God, poor guy, poor Alex. This looks just like a tant rum . Anyway, I'm not gonna lie to you. I think when I look back at his career and our and our time together, uh a lot of what he's done seems like a tant rum. It's true. I would even go so far as to say most , if not all , we of his life is a tant rum of one form or another. Yeah, we've spent about nine years documenting a baby throwing a fit. So two things two things about that. One most babies don't have beards. Two Alex's beard is shit . I've seen babies with better beards . Like me . Can't beat that. I don't need to. Okay . So the rest of the show is kind of dull, and to be blunt with you, I lost interest. So much whining, so much advertising masquerading his content, and so much desperate begging for the media to fight with him. A man can only take so much. The truth is that the episode peaked when Alex yelled ludicrous lyrics, and we weren't gonna be able to find greener pastures after that . We all remember Alex yelling move bitch about Hillary Clinton and how it became a meme. But what's interesting to realize is that when he did this bit on this show on September 9th, 2016, it had no impact. No one cared. But then, on October October 4th, Julian Assange announced that he was gonna be doing a live stream from Berlin , and Alex decided to do an all-night stream to cover it because he thought it was going to be a big reveal of all of Hillary's crimes and emails. Maybe Roger put that idea in his head, who knows. The stream was an epic disaster , and we covered it on episode 135 of our podcast. Alex just gets madder and more disappointed as the night goes on, realizing that Assange was just doing a stream to celebrate the tenth anniversary of WikiLeaks . On that stream at about 4 30 in the morning, Alex was entirely out of gas and pulled the ludicrous bit out to kill a little time when Owen Schreuer was being really boring as a co-host. Oh my god, he was so bad. And that time it worked . People , bitch, get out the way. We people made a song for us? Yeah. People put memes together of Alex singing ludicrous and possibly as a way of trying to pretend that they weren't all super disappointed by Alex being very wrong about Assange's stream, Infowars pushed it hard. It was the best meme, and it really captured the spirit of the Trump movement in the days before the 2016 election. And I thought there was a small irony to the fact that Alex went viral doing the ludicrous thing a month after he did the same thing and no one cared. But there's a deeper irony here, and a deeper story, and that is that I can pinpoint for you the exact moment when Alex decided that he was going to do this ludicrous bid. On August 25th, 2016 , about two weeks before Alex first discovered Ludacris' biblical song and decided to yell some of the lyrics, he had the proudest boy of them all, Rambo Joe Biggs, on his show. Can I just say before we hear this clip, you're the fucking devil . You're the fucking devil. I hope nobody follows me . So uh so Joe Biggs uh he was on the show and they were talking about some of the new videos that he had put out in the process of describing some of the memes that Joe was ripping off, they had this conversation . I have been spending hours at night and during the day almost getting nothing done now, just trying to watch what you guys did. It's all so informative and so entertaining. Well, one of the craziest one of my favorite video, it's not that long, but it's the black lives could care less about black lives. We're gonna get to that in a minute, but first I want to just point out that you have won a thug life award. Uh and for folks that don't know what these are, tell tell the listeners. So it's whatever you basically uh do something that's uh pretty awesome and uh it's when you actually you essentially just have to like drop the mic and walk away because you just did something so epic and then they started making these videos where it's like sideways hat drops on your forehead and big glasses with diam onds and like a joint and a machine gun in your hand . And they play like some Dr. Drake song in the background. So it's uh we 're ludicrous. Yeah. Maybe I'll live. The point is get out the way. In fact, okay, here's the short clip, and then we'll play the actual clip first. Uh here it is. If I go to Mexico right now illegally, without citizenship, and I don't have a passport, I will go to jail. Okay, okay, and then if you're illegal here, you should go to jail or be deported. Okay, I'm waiting for somebody to put me in jail now. Well Donald Trump's gonna do it. Stay tuned for more reports at InfoWars.com. I'm Joe Biggs . We hate him out of order. Alright, now let's get serious and get back to the clips. Let's get serious. Yeah, so it's pretty easy to see what happened here. Joe Biggs was getting a little bit of hip-ho stpreet cred, and Alex wanted a piece of that for himself. He thought the cool song that kids were making memes to was ludicrous, so that pro song got stuck in his head, which led to him ranting about how the show is a Bible stud y. No one cared, but when his brain was almost turned off in the middle of the night, he pulled that bit out one more time, and that time it stuck. And it became a meme and he made a lot of money off it. So the lesson here , Jordan, is never give up on your hacky bits . History is gonna remember that Alex had a ludicro us meme in the days before the 2016 election, but they're gonna forget the false start he had on September 9th. They're gonna forget the time that he stole the idea from one of his dipshit employees doing a meme about a different s ong, and then that guy exited overthrew the government. Yeah . First things first. The best advice I ever gave myself was give up on your hacky bits. So that was a good one . And second, you know, sometimes, sometimes I think about our show and I look back on it and I think of us more of like a strange like butterfly effect time travel show. Like if you go through any of our episodes and pick like a weird moment and just go like what if I went back in time and just stopped that shit? And we' justre like, no, you don't you don't get to say, move, bitch, get out the way tonight. You know? And then what what world would we live in? What different world would we live in if somebody just stopped Alex from saying move bitch get out of the way that night, you know, there's so many demarcation points where the future turned to shit. And it's probably all your fault for not fucking Alex Jones up. That's my point. Well, you know, I it's it's hard to argue. But I will fair enough. I will say that I I don't know if him doing move bitch memes like that. Maybe there are more consequential things. Maybe there are more consequential things, yes! This wasn't the inflection for you. Oh are you gonna outlaw sarcas m? Shit! You got me again . So uh yeah, that brings us uh to the end of these uh these here clips. We have enjoyed Alex discovering ludicrous and finding out the truth of how it actually happened. Amazing. What a ride. What fun. It is a ride. It is fun . You know, I think a lot of our shows, here's the fun thing about our live shows, is that the two of us do not know when we're going to end. Nope. Not at all. Every single live show we have done, we have both looked at each other once the clips have done, we've kind of kept talking, we've looked at each other, and both of us have been like, is it time yet? Neither of us know. Neither of us know. And we've all because we're comedians, we're always searching for that like laugh to leave the show on. And what I want to do is set this up to just fucking not make people laugh. Okay. Right? And to just like leave them hanging and like sad , miserable, wondering whether or not they're ever gonna hear us again, whether or not like if I like LCD sound system last show, like maybe next year we'll do like a re reunion tour. And then years after that, we'll do another reunion tour until basically we're not done. We just do the show forever like LCD Sound system does. Yeah. I think that's an awesome idea. Yeah. Leaving people in that kind of a mood. I think that rules. Thank you all. That's been our show. Thank you so much.