Second Thoughts and Show Wrap Up

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Watch the official Game of Thrones podcast, House of the Dragon on HBO Max, or listen wherever you get your podcasts H it it ha it it Sure L Angeles I love to leave it live from Hollyood I' Johnvt and I like my reflecting pools like I like my text green. We've got a great show for you tight, but first let's get into it. What a week President Jadie Vance left Switzerland on Monday after a marathon session of talks with Iranian diplomats. That was the longest week of my life, said an Irani negotiator after spending a single day with Vance Here's Vance describing the summit We laid a very good foundation for a successful final deal The final deal is the house. We set the foundation. We haven't built the house, but we've laid a successful foundation to get to a good place for the American people. Thanks for spelling out the analogy of a foundation, you charisma void. How stupid is he think we are We know what a foundation is. We know the foundation is the base on which a building may or may not be built. We understood your point. In fact, the philosopher Daniel Dennett, bear with me, chill out. Oh, it's gonna be fine. May his memory be a blessing. All right, he described analogies as what he called intuition pumps in that an analogy can push you towards an intuitive understanding even if that understanding is wrong For example, a house is like a complex nuclear deal in that you start by laying a framework and you build from there. It's not like a complex nuclear deal, in that when you're building a house, you don't lay the foundation before you have a final plan for the fucking house. And if you and your contractor have said explicitly that you would like to build completely different houses and if any of your rooms do not fit Their vision, they'll blow up the whole fucking house. And yes, I know that spelling all this out makes me seem like Trump's energy secretary in this clip. Thank you, mister President. hundred hundred twenty one hundred and forty one years ago, Albert Einstein, one hundred and twenty one years ago. Albert Einstein published a paper. Nobody cares Just when you think just when you think he's lost it, Trump shows us that the part of his brain that's responsible for bullying is still lighting up like the Christmas tree at Rockeveller Center. Like how towards the end when he performed with Lady Gaga, Tony Bennett wouldn't know where he was, but when she poked him with a stick, the duets were magical. You know what I'm saying You see his face turning? The guy really fucked up because if he had just not got confused about the length of time, how long ago Einstein has published those papers, which was nineteen oh five. so it was one hundred twenty one years ago. He hadn't gotten screwed up On the number, he might have been able to get his little story out, but you see Trump's face being like, I'm to fucking I'm gonna to lay this guy in the ground. Nobody cares. Absolutely devastating. The fact that that is so funny is how we got here. Anyway, Vance claimed at the news briefing that Iran had agreed to allow nuclear inspections in the country But Iran's foreign minister denied it. But here are you going to believe a bunch of lying bloodthirsty religious extremists or the Iranians Before leaving Switzerland, Vans was asked about an awkward moment at the talks There was a moment yesterday when Arachi came into the room and did not greet you, you guys did not shake hands and then he walked out of the room. Did you feel stubbed by that? Did you feel it was an intentional move on their part? How did you interpret what happened? No, I mean, I trust me, I've spent a lot of time dealing with the Iranians over the last few months. Sometimes I find them extremely confusing as negotiators Now, I see where they're coming from, said the pope. The talks almost fell apart after Trump issued a series of threats over the weekend, including this one. He says we may take over the straight If we have to, I'll blow the S out of them. Happy Pride, everybody. We'll block the straight from here and maybe from here, we'll block it from both directions Here's Vance defending The president's threats. What we told the Iranians yesterday is when you guys engage in what us millennials might call trash talk, you can't expect the president of the United States not to respond and not to correct the record. Every once in a while, I remember that I'm two years older than JD Vance and it makes me want to develop a nuclear enrichment program of my own The Pentagon has reportedly told senators that it needs eighty billion dollars in new funding to cover the cost of the war in Iran Has the Pentagon considered asking the soldiers to bring their own missiles from home? Set a third grade teacher buying Elmer's gllue on her way to work Suggle up. She returns later You're gonna. She'll be So if you didn't like that, wait, she's coming back. made you uncomfortable thinking about teachers buying school supplies on their way to work while we're spending eighty billion dollars to bomb Iran and then pay them more to fix the stuff we bombed Stay tuned, We'll keep talking about it. Meanwhile, the Senate on Tuesday passed a war powers resolution with four Republicans joining every Democrat and voting yes except for contontrarian Ogre John Fetterman. The resolution is basically a slap on the wrist, which in Trump's condition could be fatal. Mitch McConnell missed the vote as he was in the hospital for an acute case of touching the water in the reflecting pool Speaking of, as Trump struggles to secure a body of water in the Middle East, he's also struggling to gain control of another body of water right here at home. To catch you up, Trump said only he could fix the reflecting pool on the National Mall We're going be able to do it for about a million eight, one point eight million. And it's gonna take one week In the end, no part of this was true, not the cost estimate, not the time estimate, not even the phrase we're gonna to be able to do it Then the Trump administration awarded a one point seven million dollars no bid contract to a Trump donor named John J Kfarro and his company, Greenwater Solutions. And I also can't stress this enough. this is what John J Kafarro looks like It's unbelievable. He looks like if the one guy' sleezier than Donald Trump ate Donald Trump. He looks like the Ringmaster who is furious that Dumbo is too sad about his mom to fly. He looks like he's in town for the Adams familyamily reunion, but can't attend because it's too close to a school Here's one where he's chomping on a literal cigar. Even if you knew nothing about this man, we should not be trusting the aesthetics of our national mall to someone who lets his eyebrows go gray while dyeing the rest of his hair, jet fucking black. arow gave two hundred fifty thousand dollars to the Trump Victory Committee back in twenty twenty. He is also a convicted felon, having pleaded guilty in two thousand one to bribing corrupt Ohio Cgressman James Travigant, who looked like this And as a rule of thumb, you should not be awarding contracts to people who you found on a guess whoo board The administration also awarded an even bigger no bid contract over fourteen million dollars to realine the reflecting pool in what they called American flag blue. But the only thing that's blue are my balls waiting for Trump to fix this reflecting pool. Because the reflecting pool is once again filled with green algae and the new lining is peeling off in chunks, and so our big boy is embarrassed A curious about this situation as we stood here with you in April when you first revealed the plans. I said what? In April, you showed us pictures of what you were going to do one. you said you had a guy It was going to do it in a week for about a million dollars Well, it's been two mon to say sixteen and a half million. Yeah. Okay, ready Barack Hussein Obama, haveave you ever heard of that The guuy has been president for a decade. Trump really has Obama on the brain in the spots the dementia hasn't eaten, of course. And so now Trump is claiming that the reason the pool is green and peeling is not because of corruption and incompetence, but because of sabotage We also fixed the reflecting pool In fact, if you go over there right now, it looks very good. It's up. They put somebody said fertilizer in the water. If you put fertilizer in the water, you get algae But somebody said they might have put fertilizer it. They did something to create the algae. No one creates the algae It was always there It never left. Algae was either created by God or evolution, or if you're a liberal churchgoer trying to avoid the contradictions in your mind, God through evolution This is. This is like leaving a bunch of plums in your kitchen and coming back after a vacation to find fruit flies and announcing that someone must have broken into your house with some sort of fruit fly gun. Trump was adamant that it was knife wielding vandals and not his contractors who were to blame. Are the contractors who did the initial work for the reflecting pool are they to blamed for the current condition or is it No no noand Noand. They went in there with a knife. Let's assume Trump is right. Let's just assume it. Let's assume he's right and that vandals went in there with a knife. Should you be able to do that to a pool with a knife? I still think I think if you stab a pool and it instantly becomes a giant composting toilet, there's still a problem with the pool The same traitors Trump claimed poured corrosive and destructive chemicals into the pool, describing the vandalism as, quote, an affront to both Presidents George Washington and Abraham Lincoln, and should be dealt with accordingly Whoa, hold on there, Mr. President. I agree these vandals are bad news, but I don't think they deserve what Araham Lincoln got famous murdered. Besides, whatever happened, Lincoln is not part of it. It's like if my toilet started overflowing and I accuse nefarious toilet scoundrels of disrespecting Vanessa Hudggins, who hasn't lived in my house for years. And for our new listeners, I live in Vanessa Hudggins's old house and I keep wrecking my toilet At least six people have been arrested and cited, but not for tampering with the pool, rather for grabbing pieces of detached pool coating that are floating to the surface. And that's just a fun souvenir, like taking home a piece of the Berlin wall if the Berlin wall collapsed because of Soviet incompetence, whichich in a sense, it did On Monday, a dead duckling could be seen floating in the reflecting pool, but only briefly as Halth Secretary RF K junior soon swallowed it whole The ongoing pool saga has inspired protests, including members of the public who have declared themselves team algae. Oh have let g To recruit new team members, they posted a kelp Wanted ad. Speaking of affronts to the nation. on Friday, Trump unveiled the luxury Boeing seven hundred forty seven he received as a gift from Qatar, which will ever so briefly serve as the new Air Force O. This clip is, of course from last week, before the plane was completely covered in a thick layer of algae Here's the president bragging about his new toy. This plane was transformed into a flying White House at a level of luxury that nobody's ever seen before. Wow, cool, said that same third grade teacher from earlier, waiting through a creek to catch frogs for her students to dissect You're upset about America The joke is good Hh, putut that on my tombstone. All right, we've got a great show for you tonight. And we'll be right back. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love it or Leave it coming up Love to Leave it has brought you by simply say if the problem with most security systems is that they only alert you after a break in has already started and that is too late That's why Ive set up a simimpllyafe to secure my home using the outdoor camera series two and advanced AI alert, simimpllyafes, US based live agents can identify threats on your property and help deter them stopping crime before it starts. That's real peace of mind. It wass very easy to set up a simimpllySafe, as I've mentioned. 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That's one of the kinds of fabric they have. I've basically upgraded to the second skin underwear, which I also really like Wear it every day. suuper comfortable. So go to Tommyjohn. com today and save twenty five percent on your first order with code. loveove it Comfort, perfected, just use code. Love it at check out and upgrade your essentials today. Tommyjohn. com Code, love it We'll have our guests out in just a moment, but first, a big thank you to our friends of the pod. If you are not yet a subscriber, consider this your midterm reminder when you become. A friend of the pod subscriber, you get a discounted ticket to Croked Con, you get ad free episodes of all your favorite pods. You unlock more Pod Save America, including Pod Save America, only friendriends. That is our subscription only show that is very loose where we say the things that we don't want everybody to hear. You get our Open Tabs newsletter, you get Dan Peiffer's Pller coaster, you get ad free breaking news episodes and more. plus your subscription help support pro democracy media and trying to get good information in front of more people. So please, please, please become a friend of the pod at crooked. com slash friends. And if you're in L.A, can still get tickets at crooked d. com slash events to check out our new space and upcoming guests, including John Stamos, Jodody Turner Smith, Mark Dupllace, and more And now how please welcome to the stage. He's made some of the finest LA material.'s pulled prize winning journalist Matt Hamilton Hi, welcome. G to meet you Thanks for being here. Thank you for having me. So you're part of LA. Maturia, which is a new local news outlet. You left the LA Times? Yes. I was there for a decade. For a decade. And the LA Times has gone under some big changes under its billionaire owner. And one that I think is really frustrating for a lot of people is the LA Times used to be an incredibly valuable resource for local elections because if LA and California generally, our ballots are stupid and insane. They have dozens and dozens and dozens of offices and different initiatives you have to vote on. and you're voting for things like water commissioner and it's like, well, I don't how to be an educated water commissioner vote. I don't know what a tax abatement specialist does, etcetera. And LA Times used to give you endorsements and then they stopped. Why So I'll take you back two years ago to the twenty twenty four election The LA Times had issued all their endorsements except for one in the presidential race. And the board, this editorial board, a bunch of opinion journalists, had planned to endorse Kamala Harris, But the billionaire owner, Dr. Patrick Sonong, he blocked it at the last minute And that triggered all this uproar. Board members resigned one after the other. so they're all gone. The short story is there's no one there to make endorsements at this point. So this was the first election, the first local election in which there was nothing for any race Nothing And I went to the L.A Times I was like, well, what the fuck I don't know these judges from Adam. I know. They did issue voter guides, so they do give a state of the race, but there's no recommendation of who to vote for or their explanation. And that was a very robust process. It wasn't just a bunch of people saying, yeah, pick the Democrat. They talked to both candidates or every candidate in a race. they talked to supporters of a ballot measure I mean, all the way down to community college district like low level ballot measures. I mean, the things Often as a voter in California, the first time you see someone's name might be when you're looking at your ballot. And that's a big problem if you want to make a choice about who to vote for. And so I mean, I do think this is obviously is an LA issue, but it's a broader issue about what happens when The local news business is seen as a losing bet. and so you end up either with nonprofits that struggle to generate revenue and to cover the cost of journalism. and or you have like these sort of wealthy backers that have their own interests. Yes. There's the oligarchs, there's the nonprofits And there's hedge funds. Those are kind of the three main forces in local news at the moment. and that's you know All of those have very specific interests. Some of them very noble, some of them very admirable. The consumer, the citizen, isn't always the best served in that equation So you're now at LA Material, which is a new outlet. And I should disclose that it was started by friends of mine. I am a supporter, subscriber, investor in LA Material. I'm rooting for the success of of your organization. But can you talk about What like what the The like why what is it doing that you think the L.A. Times is not doing You know, I think the LA Times does great work. They do great reporting. local TV does some great reporting. We're there to try to make LA legible. We're very small. We're focusing on Um pressing, making it accessible to your average news consumer and really meet people where they are, whether daily newsletter that's for free Um, podcasts that were' rolling out soon and exclusives that the way we look at a story is It's something you want to send to your group chat, your family group chat. You know something that lights up conversation that makes you feel smarter. That's our goal. Yes, we want to bring information to help you be a better informed consumer, voter, all the above. We also want to bring make it fun. I mean, that's a huge part. News doesn't feel fun a lot and we want to bring a dose of that too. Yeah, LA deserves more fun news because need more fun. Well, it's just there it's like the L.A Times, even before all of this sort of, there was an LA. Times kind of, I don't know, tone in which it was like It's Hollywood. Why is everything so serious all the time L This is a silly, ridiculous place. It deserves silly ridiculous coverage. That's not by the New York Post And also, LA is very hard to understand. And I think that it's hard to write news because sometimes there's the insider that knows what the difference between the county and the city and all the different structures of government are. And then there's a bunch of people who are like, what are they talking about? What's a county supervisor? So I think we're at the mind of trying to reach people who may have no idea what the hell their local government is doing or how it's structured and bring a sense of context and sweep to make that easily accessible. Yeah. well, speaking of the multiple layers of government here in Los Angeles, what do you think is like a story about Democratic governments and other places too. We're in the middle of This fire emergency again in Los Angeles. There was a there is an ongoing fire as we record this. there is still a fire at a warehouse in Boyle Heights, which is a neighborhood of Los Angeles. and you know it's still burning because Los Felas smells like fish sticks. It is a frozen food warehouse. Mayor Bass famously under a lot of scrutiny for what happened with The fires in the palisades and Altedina, what's happening with her response to the fire this time You know, big talking point that has emerged in kind of conservative media. I think the California Post had a big op ed today is Mary Bass was in Chicago for the Obama Library opening on Thursday. And this is a fire that started Wednesday. And actually just before I got here, I finally confirmed she had gone to Chicago Wednesday well before the fire had started So she wasn't out of she didn't leave town after the fire started, but she was out of town. So there's this kind of echo to the Palisades fire. Mayor Bass was famously in Ghana when that broke out. There had been all these red flag warnings. So there's some scrutiny there. But at the end of the day, she runs the fire deepartment and the LA Fire Department is the one responding to this warehouse fire and it's It's kind of an emerging public health crisis. There's so much we don't know And we ran a story today that talked about, yes, like there's poollution sensors. air quality sensors that tell you some information about like the There is particulate in the air. We just don't know the type of heavy metals and toxins that are in the air at the moment Cool, yeah. I mean So we smell it, we see it The fire is still going on. and Mayor Bass has kind of been front and center. She's been Hing like press conferences, excuse me, press availabilities. But It's still kind of an emerging crisis at the moment. Yeah, well part of this is doesn't just get laid at the feet of Karen Bass. There is a larger problem in the governance of democratic cities, both in the ways in which through years of sort of progressive reform, there's just a lot of bureaucracy. that snimmyies the ability of leaders to just make quick decisions because they're meant to be more accountable. and that accountability comes with sort of sludgy process. also LA, we we are onene of the biggest and richest cities in the country in the fifth or fourth largest economy on Earth. We have the same number of firefighters in Los Angeles today as we did Decades ago and a massive budget deficit we can't seem to close. And so even as the firefighters are trying their best to deal with this situation, they are struggling because of a resource problem. I think there's to some extent, maybe a resource problem. I think it's just the structure itself is inherently complicated. We're talking, it's a half million square feet. There's eighty five million pounds of frozen food inside. H'ence the smell of the fish stick. Its like kind of this veryer specific foam lining. This is a frozen food warehouse So And it's in a dense area. So it's kind of getting to it, getting to where the fire is, navigating the complexities of all that food inside, all of that is not necessarily preventable or foreseeable. It's not like Mayor Bass knew this fire was going to break out when she went to Chicago or the fire department for that matter. So I think I give a little latitude to the complexity of this type of fire You never want to see the fire department being like, it's going to burn for a while. It's going to get better then it's going to get worse. We're not sure. And then the meat's going to rot. What's going to happen to them rotting meat And you know, There was footage today of like rats in the area. So it's just oh no, the rats have caught fire and now they're running amk. So it's just one thing after another. Mayor Karen Bass, what will you do to stop the flaming fire rats from ranaging your city? Why are you in Chicago I mean, that's a question for her. But I think One data point, this same company had a fire, I believe in Washington or two years ago Tw years in Washington. It was in twenty twenty four, sixty fucking days. Yeah. this thing burned. So what? right? Isn't that crazy? What do you mean you can't put it out? What's all the science for Why do we build a space shuttles if you can't put out this fucking fire No comment. We put we We pretended to put people on the moon for this. But no, I mean, another part of it is so LA is very complicated. said There's Los Angeles, but then there's all these neighboring cities. And so right next to where this fire is is an area called East Los Angeles. Now East Los Angeles, they don't have a mayor, they don't have a city council. they're uninorporated LA County. So they exist in this kind of quasi no man's land that is run by the Board of suupervisors, which is a five member body that oversees a fifty billion dollars budget. now fifty billion do. LA City's budget is fifteen billion. So this is this kind of like shit show, if you will, of L.A municipal government. and it's For people that are not from here LA County is roughly the size of Ohio. A democracy in Ohio has a legislature, a governor, an attorney general, It has all of these people and all of these agencies. Los Angeles countounty is run by five people. Yes people, this star chamber that nobody really knows much about, but it controls basically one of the biggest Public health. Yeah. Children familyamily serervices U Sheriff's Department budget, public works. I mean, like extremely powerful, very little coverage. I reiter I said this to Mayor Bass when she was on the show once, which is Uh The idea that the fact that we have a weak meership, right, a lot of people like go, why can't LA have have our own Mum Donnie and as well They only made one of him, and he's over there somehow. But also LA has a weak mayorship in part because of this strong county. And man, I wonder when we're going to start talking about Los Angeles, the city, leaving Los Angeles, the county, we orre figuring out some new arrangement because this is whether it's the fires or a whole bunch of other issues of mismanagement. like this is this is no way to run a railroad Yeah, I mean, it's government by committee. And when powers diffuse like that, it's also very hard to hold people accountable and kind of figure out where the buck stops. And I think Mayor Bass, there's plenty of things she does control, but I think in the public eye, she absorbs a lot more criticism than she has deserved. I think in part because People just have this idea the mayor of LA controls all of this. and she's a very limited sphere in which she operates.' totally think we should hold her accountable for. Don't get me wrong So earlily this year, Ellie Material uncovered the secret Instagram account of Disney CEO Bob Eiger, who stepped down a few monthso. his secret Instagram handle was Max Striker. Great name. Great name. which is why we're playing a game we're calling you better lurk, bitch I'm going to name a famous pseudonym. You have to tell us the man behind it. Are you ready? I don't think I am. First up, Pierre Delecto Oh, u Mitt Romney. That's correct. In twenty nineteen, the Atlantic confronted Romney about a slate article claiming he had a Lurker Twitter account under the name Pierre Delecto. and then Senator from Utah replied I don't know How do you do French? You seem like you might know Oh. A you inir Sis That's what Matt Romney said That's where Republicans used to be, rich guys that spoke French. Next up, we have the pseudonym George Fox M. It was uncovered a week after this person was busted as part of a high priced prostitution ring. Oh Elliot Spitzer. It is. It's Ellot Spitzer Thank for the hint his it was his pseudonym and He used the name George Fox, and George Fox was a real person. and George Fox had to put out a statement that said, mister Fox has known Governor Spitzer for twenty years and has been a supporter during the governor's various campaigns. The news that his name may have been used as an alias comes as a great surprise and disappointment. Next up Jon Baron Oh How could I forget? Donald J. Trump? That's right He use it as a pseudonym He also used John Miller to call in and praise himself during his divorce from Marla Mapel's. L call CN is John Miller to say, God, this guy Trump's great Marla Mapel' success He also used the name David Dennison when signing his documents with Stormy Daniels. that's right. Next up, Reinold Nieber Rin Reinhold Nieber The German theologian. The theologian and philosopher Reinhold Nieberth That would be our esteemed former FBI director, Jim Comey. Yes, James Comey, even had a smug and fucking pompous fake pseudonym. This guy, this tall asshole is even self righteous when he's pretending to be someone else on the internet like Mac Striker. Unlike Max Striker. That's just cool Oh wow. that was I didn't realize that uh That one of Reinald Nieber's posts was What's the point of watching fully clothed beach volleyball hashtag NBC Olympics Wow, come on, James Comey, a little bit dirty. eleven PM too eleven PM. C couple. He had a tall glass of wine, I think. Last one, Carlos's danger Oh Carlo's Danger A I blinking on this It was what he was doing was also quite dangerous and illegal and he did pay a price for it. It also may have been the thing that led to Trump Oh, um and his laptop, but not the Hunter laptop He was a member of Congress. There were emails on the laptop that became part of a surprise probe that led Comey to send the letter. Oh, o, of course Anthony Wiener. That's right. Anthony Wiener. You got it. There he is. Thank you for the help. You will ye. So I, when I was in politics, I would write jkes for politicians sometimes, just almost as like sometimes you do whole speech, but a lot of times people because people knew I wrote jokes for people. They would just reach out, Hey, you have a couple jokes here, a couple a couple of jokes there. And so I had written a few jokes for Anthony Weiiner when he was a member of Congress, pre disgrace And then I remember when this remember he what happened was he had posted an image of his like Uwear, like like like a penis shot of his underwar. What do you call it a bulge? Bulge shot C Bulge, Cot shot, Bulge And and then deleted it. And I remember thinking, I believe him. He was hacked. Thank you to Matt Hamilton, everybody, check out his reporting at LA material. com and find him at Underscore Hamilton, Underscore Matt. on X. We'll be right back. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of loveove it or Leave it comoming up Love to leave it is brought you by SelectQuote. They say there are two certainties in life, death and taxes, but at least with taxes there' a chance you'll get a refund. With life insurance, you're just making sure your family doesn't get the bill. 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I was very excited. Rarapped? No, she lse. She found her coinur was like Yeah. And I was like perfect. That's sweet. Yeah, I loved it. That's the only money I've ever gotten. I have a thirty two year old too. He didn't give me anything. Did he get a phone call? No. No phone call. I got a text. A teax In the middle of the day. He got a call. No, he sucks But my oldest daughter gave me something. What? A baby.. I'm a grandfather now, so grandfather. Yeah. Wow. Wow. So so and Father's Day is additive, right? Like you get Father's Day applies to grandchildren. they have to call you too. Yeah eventually. Hopefully, rightight Maybe I get another dollar If did you get anything for Father's Day? Yeah, now I got a board game called Thunder Road Vendetta. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that a sequel to Thunder Road or is it called Thunder Road Vendndetta? Thunder Road used to be a board game that existed, I think in the eighties based off of Mad Max. And then they remade it and did the new like models and it was really cool So there's one that I got the base set and then my fiancee got me the expansion to go with it where it's like it's called like U Twisted Tina because it's based off a Thunder Dome and with Tina Ter. Yeah, exactly The were nice. Yeah, yeah.. Did you see it in the eighties? Yeah, yeah. I used to love What's Love got to do with it. That used to be my favorite movie. Really?. What an interesting favorite movie. I know, it was weird. Like it definitely was weird. My mom banned me and my sister from watching. She wass like, why I like watching this? BeCa I feel like in general, biopPics are a kind of one and done situation. Like they can be great and amazing and you're glad they exist. but you're never like,h, you wantan to go back and watch One of those? Yeah. Also, I realize you asked if I've seen Tina Turner in Angela Bassett plays. That's not actually Tina Turner in that movie. So that doesn't answer your question, I just I was just like, yeah, I've seen Angelvance let you ride away with Yeah, Yeah, yeah, you didn't let me up. I was like, no, I messed up. I was totally in the movie too. Ive you know, I mean, I went with you to the movie. Well I think in it shows Tina like, you know, doing a performance. So yeah. Yeah, I mean A movie about Tina Turner iss your favorite movie, It'd be weird if you hadn't actually also seen Tina Turner. Yeah. It's a crazy thing. No, that's a difference because my dad actually went to go see Tina Turner and I remember him getting ready and all he was talking about was her legs. He was like legs. like you pervert. Yeah But you know he's getting the floor seats getting, you know, in the view. Yeah, yeah, exactly So Alie, your new special is called My father. I assume that means you had a simple, excellent relationship with your father. No, I had a difficult relationship. makes her a better special, probably. was He wasn't a perfect father, you know, but he was mine So, you know, I just went with it, you know, this is what it is You know, he wouldn't The Cosby Sow or James Evans If you saw those things. What's James Evans? Good times Oh good times. I remember good times. I just remember the name. That was his name. J. I don't remember the character names. I watched good times. was on in the It was on in the he watchatched Good timimes. I didn't know who Okay That's a difficult one, but I'm gonna go with it. Florida. I good times. Yeah, Not even the state. Even when I hear Florida I still think of good times. I don't think of the state Ify, did you watch Good Times? Yeah, I did. Specifically because you knowew the scene was downam, downam down.ames. Yep. Oh yeah. Now I'm hearing it.. R remember Alf's name I watch Remember Alf? Yes, I watched it. I get in trouble for bringing up Alf too much. No. With both the people that work here and the audience. They didn't like the sitcom. I just bring it up too much. Oh you just This is the first time in three episodes. And that's the longest we've gone without my bringing up Alf. Oh wow Health used to be here in the Universal Studios stududio tour because I grew up out here and so my dad's from Nigeria. So as anytime somebody would come from Nigeria, it was like, Oh, you want to see you know LA. And we'd just go to Universal stududios. But we would just it was like a dice roll whether we went inside. Most of the times we'd posed in front of the The fountain and then leave, which was like like whatever blue balls are for kids, that was what I had. And I wass like, are we going we going? Are we going to University of stududios now we just pose and we flicking up and go home Who's that picture for Oh upsore people in Nigeria. Yeah yeah. I' go back it's like, see who was there. Not inside, but who was there If what does your dad think about your career trajectory? Oh, you ask him now, he'll say he always believed in me. You know, he'll tell He's like, you know, if he always told you, you just gott to focus, he's like, no, he told me to run away from my dreams. He said they were nightmares, but now if you ask him, he'll be like, you know I tellld them, you gott toa focus up. One time we werere at dinner and you know Yvon Orie, you know another great comedian who's Nigerian, he's like, telling me he's like, you know I saw in an interview, she said her parents wanted her to be a doctor, lawyer or engineer and didn't support her doing comedy. And I was like, Yeahah, dad, what was that like? He's like, I know and kept eating. Like he didn't That' Yeah, exactly. you know. Irew up next to some Nigerians No yeah. defeinitely he's a doctor now. No see he'll bring it up now. But now, you know, there's too many Nigerians because it cool when like I did a commercial Yeah because like when I did a commercial, it wass like, o, this is great. Like my dad didn't know, he didn't know it was aspirational. And then Eggo went and got on NL. He's like, whyy why don't you don know N SNL? You know Uh, you know, I you know, I'm not trying to do all that, you know o Two. Because it was cool when my dad thought like I hit the height of my career when I was in an AT and T commercial, you know? Now that he knows there's other things you can do, now he's expecting it. And Al so your twenty twenty five special was called My Two Sons And u It won an NAACP awward, which was the first independently released comedy special to ever be nominated. It's watched millions of times on YouTube. U Have you ever felt like like Are there like Netflix executives and others that are like, Like, we fucked up, we should have bought that thing. And now you do it on your own and you get millions of views yourself. They were like that doing Domino effect, the first one that I endly produced. But you know, I don't have aspirations of going to a big place on a larger platform because I can't do that many specials on their platform It'll be one every two or three years. It wouldn't be the volume that I'm putting out now. You know, I have six specials in the can and I'm just dropping them as I see fit. so Wh very productive. Oh know. If, why don't you do more? That's what I was thinking. I was thinking like youually like Oh don't know in my head, my dad popped up right here. he's like, huh, All, how many do you have in the can? Zero. Zero, I'm making it stretch, you know? I'm at that point in the can where you put some more water in it and you shake it up . Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's funny. Ify, your brand is Black nerd. Yep Allie, what's the nerdiest thing about you Man, they would say that I garden, you know, I know a lot. Who's they Who's they that is saying Who are the Do you garden? Because you know I'm from a different cut of cloth and they don't think that I'm supposed to garden. but why not? I've been planting things for a long time. Oh ye and growing things and, you know, that's what happens. Why don't people want you to garden? I have no idea. Why can't you have fun gardening? It seems very I don't know what they think about it, but it's very manly thing especially when I talk about gardening, you know, different plants are different, you know? Wow, that's beautiful, you know That's byy the way, people don't think about that enough. Yeah Yeah, like corn is a very, you know, arere you growing corn? Yes. very sexy fruit. very sexy vegetable. It likes to be planted together so it can shifting gro up is very. I'd to tell you something. When I think of somebody gardening, it never occurs to me that they're growing corn because I would think you know, maybe a tomato in there, some herbs, maybe flowers, maybe a little vegetable or something. But when I think of corn, I think of industrial. I think corn's a thing where you got to have a whole field And it the big machine like a thresher No, you just It a little spot, you know, you don't have to plant all the corn. I made that mistake of planting too much ora. No. And they just took over. Yeah, you doing AP plants. You know, like like okra and corn And Katalu grows crazy. Well, you don't have to plant it once And then it just takes over. If your dads were to do stand upp about you, what would they make fun of Man My dad would probably make fun of how round I was at ten. I was a very round kid. But it was his fault. you know? you can't tell me how to teach me how to make a baked potato in the microwave and then buy a bag of potatoes and don't think I'm a you all. Yeah Wow, I did not expect you to say that.f food off all the foods I think of like kids like going crazy on, never just loose potatoes. No. You can your chips or something. Once you learn how to bake a potato in the microwave, that's just microwave. five and you can put all the butter and cheese and sour cream that you want on it. Oh, it's ten of them a day. You have to eat them for snacks Nsice too many potatoes.. Hey, I found your problem. What would your dad make fun of you about? Oh, you know, I think it'd be like, you know, because he's like a very type A person and I'm a type B person and I you know, was undiagnosed with ADHD for a long time. So probably how late I usually am, you know, just how much I'm not, you know doing anything that he likes, you know I hope you haven't internalized that too much. Not at all. You can check out Ali's brand new special, My father on your YouTube channel right now. You can get tickets to A's international custom fit tour at Ali Sadk dot com and check out ify as the host of I'm actually on dropout and go to ifycomedy d. com for tour dates. We'll be right back Hey, don't go anywhere. there's more of Love it or Leave it coming up Lo it or Leave it is brought you by Fast Growing trees Did you know Fast growrowing Trees is America's largest and most trusted online nursery with thousands of trees and plants and over two million happy customers? Well, if you didn't before, you do now. They have all the plans your yard or home needs, including fruitre, privacy trees, flowering trees, shrubs and houseplants, all grown with care and guaranteed to arrive healthy. Whatever you're looking for Faz growrowing Trees helps you find options that actually work for your climate space and lifestyle. Faz growrowing Trees makes it easy to get your dream yard, and you click order and grow. get healthy thriving plants delivered to your door. 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Use code Lve it to save today. offers valid for limited time terms and conditions may apply Question, Are you politically engaged and spiritually exhausted? If you said yes to both, welcome home. I'm Earon Ryan And I'm Alyssa Master Monaco And we're the host of hysteria, the podcast for women who care about democracy culture and not losing their minds in the process. We break down the news, call out the nonsense, and spotlight the women actually fighting back on Capitol Hill, in classrooms, and everywhere the stakes are high. It's sharp, honest analysis featuring women's voices, with humor and zero hand holding Listen to hysteria wherever you get your podcasts and watch full episodes on YouTube Feel your best and amplify your everyday luck with Thrive Cosmetics. Go to thrivecosmetics dot com slash shine twenty six for an exclusive offer of twenty percent off your first order. That's Thrive Cosmetics CA U S E MET ICS dot com slash shine twenty six We're back Once a year, we all come together to remember that we have dads, but at what cost? We'll find out in a segment. We're calling when you're here, your family. Derogatory. Here's how it works. I'm going to present you with a series of challenging W you Rather dilemmas about family There are no wrong answers There are also no right answers. And that's what having a family is But just like in a real family, you have to pick a side. Are you ready? I'm ready. Yes. Would you rather be stuck on that Hontav virus cruise with your entire family for a week or have one of your parents walk in and you masturbating I'm on the cruise. Take your chances on. Take my chances on the cruise. Yeah. I'm going with masturbation. One, because I feel like, you know you know, some of the people in my family cannot handle Htav virus. You know, like I don't think they'll be able to rock with it. And also, you know, when I was twelve, the FBI thought I was an adult having cyber sex with a Another child but it was just a kid my age. and so they brought the chat files and gave it to my parents. So I'd rather them see me jerk off than what they read. Wow What up? That was like you know that you know that like like the like short tragedy story that are like ten words. L Jesus Christ. That was horrible. We're reeling. We're reeling right now from this. I'm gonna go with the crise, still Look you Look I've already been to dark Would you rather you watch your uncle fistfight a stranger who ate your birthday cake or watch your uncle chicken out and let that guy eat your cake right in front of you? Feriss fight. Oh yeah And Yeah, it's definitely one of my ye. yeah. I'm good with it. hundred It's fight behind my birthday cake for sure. I was six That happened to you? Yes And you got the cake or did you lose the cake? I didn't like 'causeuse he still had put his hand in the cake and my uncle brought it to me while he was still dancing and I didn't like how it looked, but, you know, it was still my cake. Hell yeah. Yeah Would you rather watch your son compete on Love Island or watch your son on the biggest loser? No. I'm gonna go with loveve Island. Yeah, ye, same, same here. could you know, ' I'd think I'd be trying to like, you know, be like the coach, you know, trying to help him. I was like, all right, here how here's how you be a slut. you know, like like Dad is gonna show you what he used to do. 'cause if he was on biggest loser, my dad would be like, you letting me potatoes like It's interesting as I think about it because it's like on the one hand, Biggest Loser was kind of an evil show there was that documentary and I watched it when it ared're like, oh my God,'s really treating these people terribly. But to get healthy. And then meanwhile, on the Love Island side of it, I think anybody involved in that production should probably just go to prison.. That whole everyveryone involved, I'm sorry. I don't want to be don't I don't want to be judgmental. I want to be very progressive, but I think everyone in that Anyone involved in the making of that show, including the cast should be forced to go to church and then put in jail. Yeah Just a thought. S is in jail. Would you rather your kids be constantly broke or constantly getting dumped Oh constantly getting dumped At least you was going out, you had a little money to go out. If you was just always broke, you definitely gonna get dumped. So I'll just go, you constantly getting dumped, You going out, you know, having a good time, just not working out. Right, They haven't found the right person yet but they have money. Yeah I've been dumped and I got my G wagon and drove off And like ye for you? Yeah put a sad song on way say I have to say people in G wagons all drive like they were just dumped. You know what I'm saying? G Wagon people drive like, why isn't this car making me happy? Yeah You know what I'm saying? There's a quality of the G Wagon driver. You know what I'm saying? There's a kind of darkness to the whole enterprise. like they know that it's not doing what they thought it was going to do because on some level the materialism isn't solving their problems, but it's still a nice car and they're happy to have it, but they're just a little mean on the road. You know what I'm saying? No The problem with the G Wagon is that we're not in a space that utilizes all the things that it can do. I'm just on the street. Yeah, supp when I look at the G Wagon, all the commercials, it'sosed you're supposed to be off road You're supposed to tumble down a cliff and still be able to drive. Its all these type of things. Yeah, it's stupid. Why is the boxiest car the most expensive car? That doesn't make any self. It's windy on the highway. It's sexy inside. Yeah know, I get that because I' driving a sububaru outback and so and mine still hasn't been washed because you know, I do take it off road. and so anytime I see a clean G wagon or G when I'm like y'all some posers. Y'all some posers, y'all not in these streets. It it's just so relax road leaning on it No on the hood or just in front of it, Get out at the light. I'm Yeah. I hate when the Gwagon people get out at the light Would you rather your kid achieve their dreams but in the process become a selfish and narcissistic person, or fail to achieve their dreams and forever be tormented by it? while being a fine person, not amazing, but generally kind, but hardened and defeated by the failure. In the first scenario, you get to be on a boat a lot So your kids have a super successful asshole with a boat or a kind of hardened defeated person, no boche. H Here's my theory and here's why I think I beat the game through my dumb loophole. I think that when people get like that, like narcissists get and jaded, is because they've distanced themselves from family because no one kind of humbles you more than family You know, just did New Orleans. It was a packed house and you know, my aunts and all that was there and they're like, Yeahah, you look good on that stage. L didnn't say I'm good at comedy. just you look good up there. And I feel like, you know, I was like, all right, that's that's cool. It wasn't like there was no like, oh, I'm surprised all these people came out. It seems like you're making it. It's like, yeah, no, you keep on it I was like, I thought I did it No Keep trying. ye. like it's between my family and this guy in the Indianapolis Uber who was like, he kept being like, he was like he was like, he was like, oh, you do comedy, Do you pay bills with it? I was like, yeah, yeah, he's like, man, hope hope you make it. I'm like, what do you mean? Like like like I'm doing it. I'm living the dream. It's like, all right, man, I'll look out for you. You can't, You can see me tonight. There was a story about how There was a part that out You can see me tonight. There was a part that Dustin Hoffman was hoping to get, but he would only get it if Al Pacino said no. And he was like, God, one day I'm gonna to make it. And you're like, you're Dustinoffman, you're like the pnacleer, But you're still just like I hope I get to have my dream, you know. Do your family keep you honest? Oh very honest. My family doesn't care what I do. Like at all. It's like I'm just the guy who pays the bills. It like I come home from selling out Ana two times and then get right home and Are you taking out the trash or what? yeah Isn't that nice though? Because doesn't it mean right if the money meant you didn't have to take out the trash, that'd be a problem. It's good that the money doesn't mean you don't have to take out the trash, because you don't want to be a person for whom the money stops you from being the kind of person who has to take out the trash. Because if you don't take out the trash, you'd be the kind of person for whom the money is made you a person nobody should really listen to. I thought the sn made it why I didn't have to take out the trash I like yo, he's fifteen, and he can definitely take out the trash. Oh, yeah, he could do it. Is he not doing it? No, I took it out on the way here. What is What is it about taking out the trash? It is an annoying task. There's something about it. It's so quick and easy, and you're like, R fuck. It's two trash bs. All you have to do is roll ' them to the curve. That's all you have to do, too. I'm saying, But it's not my job Also sometimes the trash is juicy. Yes, see? That's why. That's howving people send that stuff to your family. is juicy. The trress is juicy. Yeah. They said my language was so advanced they had to make sure I wasn't an adult. And it wasn't until T that joke over a hundred times I was like, Oh, I was having cyber sex with a FBI agent. Yeah, you gotta arrest him. They didn't do that though. They came and gave my shit to my parents. I mean gave my stuff to my parents But they did with the FBI agent He gets to what This is I can't even tell. I As a child, you were catfished by an FI agent and they tried to arrest you for it. Yeah ye, But they're like, o, so he came to the door and he was like, arere you if you why way? And I was like, yeah, And he was like, Oh, thank God. And I was like, that's weird. He was like, can I talk to your parents? I was like, sureure. I don't know. So I didn't have survival skills either because if I you know I'm like this a weird moment happened with an adult man. I should go, No, they're not home and close the door and never look back. But I didn't. I invited him into our home and he then hand opened a briefcase and had a chat of me saying I was going pour syrup on someone and lick it off because I was twelve and it sounds cool Wow I didn't know about doing that when I was twelve. more ev in cyber sex. No, I was such a lay bloomer would shock shock the conscience. So but wait There's something sweet about the FBI agent being relieved that that like, oh wow, there's nothing There There's no monster in this home. There's just a horny child. I mean, that's a different day, right? Like that guy thought he was having a day where he was gonna meet the scum of the earth. some have despicable human beings. you ever come across your life and just like, no, no, just a twelve year old trying to get his rocks off. Yeahah. This is the horniest most you You were definitely advanced at twelve. Oh yeah, yeah, o yeah, no ' I was just dry humping. You was pouring syrup. Oh I was saying I would do. And I wasn't even doing anything yet. It wasn I didn't find out until after like the person stopped logging on that I was like, oh, I could be using this. You know thoughtoughts were advanced. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was doing it for the love of the game, you know, justust typing words. Lets see what this get me. Srup Let's put it right back And we're back Let's welcome Matt Hamilton back to the stage.oo Mattam everybody, Join us right there. All right, Now it's time for a segment we call secondecond thoughts. Here's how it works I take a loving stroll through everything I said or did and decide what I regret U And if you have any second thoughts about tonight, you can share them as well. I have some prepared. The producers have written down things that I should regret from this show. Oh, I made you guys sad about Tony Bennett. I made you guys sad about an imaginary teacher ur photo of James trarafficant didn't do justice to how insane that man looked. You should look up James Trafficant. He's from an era of like larger than life midwestern politicians. Just an absolute nut also went to jail for corruption I made you guys sad about Abraham Lincoln. Matt, I'm sorry that I imagined fire rats into existence. That was on my mind too Um Also, none of us should have to know about Horny James Comey. That was a bummer I no Uh I couldn't think of a single biopic I said, you know, biopics like didn't have one. Still don't. No. I guess Fory of everything. Yeah. Theory of everything. The Great Unknown was the Bob Dylan one? Oh with T Sheo. Oh yeah. Yeah. I brought up Alf again. Yeah Hey, the Britishers thought, if you might have a second thought about the phrase blue balls for kids. Yeah Yeah, it was kind of one of those things that as I was saying, I was like, hm, mayaybe not. but hey, ye, that's generally who catchsem. If you got bllue ball as a grown man with all his porn sightes on, you wow. Yeah, that's true. Well, I mean they're banning them everywhere else now, you know ike whenever I travel, you know, you try and log in. looking you're trying lo. We're trying to get there. Classic problem. Yeah, yeah. Th then then you know, you text all your partners I'm sorry. had to do this. I need you to send Nts. They're banning porn out here. No, you gott to stop having syrup on your fing Oh, I also I repeated the phrase and I quote, too many Nigerians. And I shouldn't have even repeated it. I think it was me that started it. You did, but then I did it because it was fun to say for a second. It felt dangerous. att you say it. sayay too many Niger, too many Nigerians. See, I shouldn't say it was wrong from you. I cut itut. Its like I'm gonna hear about this when I get back home. What did you say? Car about it on Twitter. Any regrets Oh Well, when I think about it, no. I'm pretty much slid with everything I say. G or bad. Yeah,'s and I'm mostly proud of too many Nigerians. Yeah I proud of that one. Oh I bad mouth G wagons to someone who has a G wagon. Yeah, I didn't like it, but I dealt with it. Also, I drive a Mercedes, but I hate it. I call him my Nazi sled. I really regret it. I hate it. I hate that car. I feel bad in it. I don't belong in that car. You know you can get rid of it if you don't like it that much. you definitely I love it No, it's the honestly, see, here's the thing. It's a Nazi sled, but I'm a Jewish person who can't break a lease.