Parenting stories and breastfeeding experiences

You want to get your backyard summer ready, but you don't want to break the bank? Wayfare gets it. planning on dining alfresco or relaxing poolside Wayfair has everything you need to prep your space. Shop now and save up to seventy percent off during Wayfare's fourth of July clearance. sccore huge deals on outdoor furniture, area rugs, and more. We're talking thousands of products for every style and budget. Plus, sururprise Flash Deals July sixth. Don't wait. Shop Wayfare's Fth of July clearance now through july sixth at wayfare dot com d Pay fair, every style, every home Welcome to another new episode of Extra Lash with Helen and ight, we're jumping straight into your voice notes today. Let's have the first one. Hello Johanna and James. Carrianne here. J just listened to your latest podcast. I just wanted to let you know yes, I do believe you will have a presence in the bedroom with you. I used to live in a house with my now ex And we used to have an old lady there who was born there. She lived there all her life. She died there And we used to feel the presence in our room. She used to come and sit and stroke our heads thinking that we were her dead father in a coffin in the room Our dog at the time would go and sit at the bathroom door and just stare at the toilet And we used to have an alleyway in between our house and next door and every night about around about nine PM co draft would walk through and the wooden floor would move and sink. and we had to get a medium in and he told us The cold draft was a man walking through the alleyway from the pub And the dog was staring at a baby in a crib, which is now where our bathroom was and the old lady was there to say goodbye to her dad who was lying roughly in a coffin where our bed was say I'm not there anymore. Mx is still there. stillill gets bothered by your but hejope Thanks for the podcast. loveove listening to it all the time Enjoy bye W, Karanne, that is amazing. It's real D you see the goose bumps on my arm?? I wonder what the hell you were doing with your They're still there. What the hell my hairs have stood on it and on my leg as well. Oh my go you have all of that gotot me that dad. I just said' see youre going in. if're gonna do this massive like big karate move or something, I thought, what the hell is he doing? And then he would show me your has just went Well, that's got to be real. That's got to be true. I mean I mean, there are, I mean, there are. you can feel it. Oh my gosh, you can feel, you can feel present. Could you stay in the house Um Think, right that you can feel if it's a safe presence or if it's a scary one. If it was safe, then probably yeah, I'd be fine If was if I remember there was a girl from school years ago and she had a new house, but I think it must have been built on land which had something going on there previously. And whenever I walked into her house There was a very cold, dark presence in that and I would start to feel physically sick. I can still see her kitchen now and I would walk in and it was cold and it was just there was there was a dark evil presence. And if I ever said I was going to sleep overnight there, I would then have to phone my mum and say, make up an excuse, I just want to come home and I'd have to leave. I remember once I did sleep over and I was sick there And it was just, I just wanted to get the heck out of that house. That house felt wrong. It felt like there was something bad and it that. ye, it was bad energy. So I think that you'd be able to feel if it was bad or if it was good energy. Imagine that though, thinking and knowing that you know, he was in a coffin which was where Your bed voys. How would that make you feel? would that scare you? Yeah, it would Yeah It would. And I suppose these things happen you don't get to find out, do you Like our she just found out? No, but what I'm saying is our previous like our previous house, right? It was an old house. Yes. We don't know what happened in that house before we moved in Weard a few things You know, about who lived there or you could look on the records and see, you know, what they did for living and things like that But you don't know what's happened So and most of the time someone probably has died in. Do remember in our old house there was an old lady who lived sort of right at the back of our old house and she had a little gate and she would just walk into our garden. because she used to do like gardening in there and stuff and she just used to with the previous neighbours just used to walk in and walk around their garden and everything And I didn't know that and the first time that I was in the living room and she was very old. She had like gray whitish sort of hair and she was all quite, you know old. And I just remember being in the living room and feeling like a presence or feeling I could see something. And I turned around and there was just this old woman staring at me through our window. just I was so scared, I jumped through the blinking roof But then you get used to sort of seeing her wandering around our garden and everything But that's yeah, that is scary Anne. I mean, my gosh, no wonder you left there because that is scary That is scary. Whoa, that is a lot. The medium as well you didn't exactly put your mind at rest. No coming in and telling you a lot of other stuff. What freaks me out is when you see the animals, when the dogs just when their head sort of turns or they're just staring into space because they can see it and they can feel it I had when I was young, I had didned like an imaginary friend Mm, what was he called Martin And he was he was purple, all dressed in purple purple top hat. and like a tail coat Weird,n't it? I know. sounds What's that? I'm not surprised. Do you think that kids can like with spir You know, imaginary friends and then young. Well when you saw him, was he a person? could you actually see him or was he in your imagination? No, it was in my imagination, but I have a picture, but I don't have a detailed It was never like a very vivid Like I couldn't tell you what his face was like. I could tell you about his s You know, what he was wearing and stuff generally, but It wasn't yeah, it was it wasn't I didn't literally see him stood in front of me Do you know that Beu has got an imaginary friend Yeah, I don't know what she's called? Tina a And she oh my God, what's just fascinating is that, you know when she starts playing by herself and she talks a lot, you know and she's playing and goes, Oh, you go over there now. And she starts talking to Tina. It's fascinating if she gets into it and she starts doing it. And I'll just sit there and I'll watch her and she'll just go, Tina, no, no, Tina, don't do that. Tina, why are you taking that away from me now Tina is going to do such and such Tina. willill you come over here and she's having a full conversation with Tina? It is amazing to watch. Yeahep, Tina It's fascinating No, I'd say it's been going on for about, I don't know, six months. It's been going for a while. Tina's been around for a while. She talks to her, she chats about her. She said Tina is tall and she's very big. And then she told me once oh my gosh, she said to me once, Mummy, Tina is standing right behind you And then she said, Tina's angry and that just freaked me out. I tried to keep calm. I was just like, Ohh yes, why is Tina angry? She's not happy and I can't remember what she wasn't happy about because I was too damn freaked out that Tina was behind me and she wasn't happy. Why she never mentioned that to me. Right, let's have another voice not. Hi, Joanna, my name's Marissa. I'm from America And forgive me if this has already been asked because I'm still catching up on the podcast But I was wondering if You've ever had any like intuition moments or like Dreams that have come true or anything like that Love everything I've seen you in. Thanks for being an awesome person Bye Oh, thank you. that's so lovely. I'm thinking about it. I very I'm very impulsive and I do follow my intuition. I can make decisions really quickly because I do just feel I do just feel I make snap decisions going yeah, come on, let's just do it And I do kind of there have been moments when we have both like phamed each other at exactly the same time. Like I will suddenly go, I just need to speak to him. And then I will click on the thing and and then just go hello and it just comes up doesn't a ring and you will have thought exactly the same thing So we're quite clearly in tune with each other and we can sense things like that. And there have definitely been moments when I've just thought, No, I'm not going do this or o, I think yeah, I definitely should go this way or that way or And then things, you know, I can't think of any specific ones where things have come true. Can you think of any that I've ever done or that you have done that have come true. No, I can't, but I know that you're very impulsive and you're very you sort of quickly feel you get a feeling for something and you make your decision really quick. And I never ever, ever regret it ever. because just go for Yeah. I just feel it because it just feels right. I'm very much a person who goes on feelings I don't worry about, well, that's the best thing or o you'd make the most money on that. or o that would be best for your career. or o you shouldn't I just know it's just what I'm feeling. That is the decision that I will go for, regardless of how it affects anybody else or if it's the best thing to know, if it feels right, bump, that's it, I'm done That's all you can do as well, isn't it? because when you know, you can just say, well That's what I wanted to do at the time Have you ever had like, oh, I'm not going to drive here or I'm going to take that different route? I think I have had things like that where I've just thought You know when you've got like a sliding doors moment. Have you ever seen sliding doors? I've had it when I'm driving sometimes I think. Just slow down for a minute I don't know why and they justcuss slowd down because I just feel like if you carry on Nock sometimes in really fast, but but you know, if you just get there a little bit later, this could be safe route. I think that quite a lot sometimes because you think when you do have an accident and I've had a few like bumps in the car and stuff you think God, it's such a floke that everything's come together that time and you've ended up bumping into each other Just a few little changes along the way, timing wise makes the difference t' it Yeah And I do think somet sometimes I do feel like, oh no, don't don't go don't go that way. go this way because it might I just feel like it's a better idea Have you some ever done anything where if you had made a different choice The whole rest of your life would have changed Is there anything? any job that you turned down or any job that you thought no, I've never actually thought about doing this before. Stuff it, go on. All right, then I'll do it. And has there been a complete change or anything in your life I sometimes think that about meeting you because we nearly met We never ams of time a few times because without knowing it, we had mutual friends. Yeah. and I had a flat in Earls caught when was a drama student And it turns out one of my flatmates was at drama school with me, we all shared this flat together. There's about four or five of us in there and u You knew her, didn't you? Yes, I you that. And it turns out you to a party. Youly came, didn't you? You stopped pointing at me Jesus, Jna keep closer Actually that cl is a back off. Am I invading your space? Am I invading your space But ye! Yeah, she invited me to a party aroundound your house once. and I was so damn terrified when I was in drama school that I couldn't cope with it. So I was like, o no, no, no. I can't talk to anybody. I'm so scared, I just want to go back to Swansey. But if I'd have come round, I would have met you. And you think if we'd have met, do you think something would have happened? I was going out with somebody What were you like at that time? Were you with someone? Well I was like cocky drama student you know. God you'd have been funllow China sort of I'd have fancy you though I just I just think that if we'd met then You know, I we were like I was like You know, But play, you know, just, you know I didn't want to settle down Well, I know. do you think that you would have made a move on me? do you think you would have? Oh yeah yeah. Oh would have done. Well you, Well, what would you have done I would try to tryrying to snog you. Snog me. G off do you think that you'd have made a move on me? I would have been very, very obviously interested in wanting to do something, but then I think it would have been too early wouldn't it? I wonder what would have happened if we'd have got together. We would't have gone out with each other. Do you think though that you know, we'd have slept together or something and then that would have been it and we wouldn't have seen each other until it then got David Copie. And then we'd have been like, oh my god. year again You. So there was that time that we could have met and then what was the other time there was an oh I auditioning for the Cherry orchel. Oh yeah. So I just worked at the Nashational and then I went to audition for Trevor Nash Yeah at the National Theatre in London. And I went to audition for Trevor Nann for the Cherry Orchard at the National and was I was a mess in that audition. I was so nervous meeting him. I was like, o my Godd, it's Trevor Nann. I went to Pieces. I couldn't remember any lines. I was dreadful with the lines that I did remember, abbsolutely blew it and didn't get the part. And then you got the job and my makeate Maxine Pk got the job as well. And then obviously a different girl got the job Gosh, if you'dg got that part we're doing playing opposite each other Oh my god. And we'd have had like a show man', wouldn't we? Well, I was going out with somebody else at the time then on that as well. Yeah, so the timing wasn't right. So I wonder if I would have, you know, gone o well, you know, I we a fancy and we' get together with him. But can you imagine that would have just completely muddied the show when that would haveve been like, and wonder if we'd have fallen out and I wonder if it would have lasted But if I hadn't got that job, right And It have got the job doing Um and't have got the job and David Copperfield We wouldn't have known each other We talk we And if if I had' have been play in playing the field, you wouldn't have seen me in that But that's basically your entire life. That's like going what if I hadn't have been born? But you know when you auditioned for something and it's just like chance in it. I mean, you go for it and stuff and you get the part, but Yeah You know, there's lots of other actors can get the part easily could have been cast and You wouldn' you wouldn't have done it. And then that would have changed our entire life. What have Our kids wouldn't have existed Yeah. Weit an So yeah, those three other times was it was just all too early. It would have just been like a one night stand And that would have been, which is what you actually thought it was going to be. When we first met because you thought that I was very posh and very English and I'd never go out with someone like you But you couldn't stop coming back for more, could you? Oh my Godd, James, that sounds awful. Well, you liked to me I thought like a pervert I couldn't stop No don't mean that No don't mean that way. you mean And also how hawky are you? I'm Stop coming back for more. You bloody came r, you moved in straight away. couldouldn't get rid of you. You moved all your stuff in straightw C come to stop coming back for more. Jesus yeah, it's mad is' it? Well, I think though, ultimately right, if you're meant to be, you're meant to be because that's like three different opportunities that we could have met and we didn't And we just so happened to meet on the fourth opportunity. We hadn't have met then on David Copperfield, we would have bumped into each other on something else. We would have. We would have somehow met You know, somebody would have thrown a party I'd have met you at a festival. somethinghing would have happened. It would have You'd have sent me a fan letter begging, I'd have gone wellet. Those were the only things though that were we could have met. and after that I don't think there were things we could have met on I don' in the wor Now I think when I first met you, I thought Because I did think you were really, really posh because you were really poshed in Dairry Copperfield. Yes. I didn't know you were Welsh. And I thought she'd look at me and she'll go Well' a bit rough, he's not really you know want to be seen with him for too long, but I might might have a night with him And and I thought I had I actually thought I had a chance of like a week or something Yeah. And then you'd go kick me into touch.. And then we started talking. No But then we started talking and we basically had the same upbringing. Yeah. Swansey and Bradford are like veryy similar town centers and cities out there. Yeah, evenven though they're in different. We had the same sort of family life and every. We had the same experience with school and wanting to get into drama and youth and all that stuff. What did you think then when I first opened my mouth? When did you first know that I was Welsh yeah, when you first started talking to me when you were sat at the table and we were having a drink. And I was o my gosh, she's not posh Mhm. She's not Push What What are you wanting to? I got I got a chance. I got a chance No no I want to know didid I offer to give your left arm yeah Yeah, you offered to give me a lift home. and then we sat outside my house for ages because I thought I'm not inviting them in. I'm going play this cool. And then you wouldn't drive off or anything until I had invited you in. and And then I think in the end I was like, No, I'm not inviting you in, but you want my number. And then I gave you my number. Yeah I was waiting hoping you'd invite me in. I remember before that, before we set off, so you got in the car and you were just about to set up drive you And I was fussing over my CDs because they used to have a little portable CD player that plug in. It had a tape on. It had a tape on the end of it with a cable coming out and you put the tape into the tape machine of the c. Oh what yeah. And it connected to the. I actually am quite impressed. Portable CD player. And all me and I was trying to get my coolest CD's. you know John Lning out You've got a Jehan Lennon album out And you said, I want to play this to you. I want to know what you think about the lyrics. And I remember thinking, o Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ. And then And then I just remember then panicking in my head thinking, oh my god, you've got to listen to the lyrics now and try and think of something, you know intelligent to say about the symbolism of such and such when you actually don' know what the hell is going on here So I was dealing with all of that. But then also at the time, I remember taking my shoes and socks off, right And it's the first one I'd ever got in your car and I put my feet in a dashboard. I mean' so Well I mean, looking as the pair of us were being a bit or whatever I mean, I can't actually believe I did that in your car. Both of us trying to be like a bit nervous were we? Yeah. Well, cocky, really? Yeah oververcompenscing. Remember the first time that you got me back into your flat after we've been out on our first proper date and you offered me a massage And then you said, you'll have to take your bra off. I can't work No ye you said, I can't give you a proper massage with this on. And I said, you'll have to work round it. and you did Oh dear. And then we stayed up kissing all night and then I remember seven o'clock in the morning, we drove to a driveroom Mc Donalds and um and then we got a drive through McDonald's' not slept. Yeah had slept. We'd stayed up all night kissing. God those were the days. I can't even get you to watch a bloody box set with me now because you fall asleep on the sofa. Do you remember? and we went to McDonald's and we got a takeout. and as we were driving along, I said, Oh Godd, I'd love to steal those flowery plants for my garden. I wonder if you can. I'm not condoning stealing at all And and that was our conversation. I still remember it. I never stole the flower careful what you say said. I'm just thinking, did we steal some p? from McDonald's we didn't know then that was seven in the morning and then you dropped me off home and then you went off. And you went and did the show that night and then you came back to my place, and then you never ever left So I do think that that attachment was so strong that if we hadn't met that one time, we would have ended up merging and merging together God. So no premonitions but weird stuff happens for a raising b. Yeah, it does. Yeah. This episode of Lash is brought to you in association with Dmentia UK On this podcast, we're always talking about how life can feel like a juggling act You know, kids, work, friends and somewhere in the middle of it all, you're supposed to be looking after yourself as well. And for some of you You're also caring for a parent or partner who's living with dementia, which is a huge thing to carry on top of everything else. If that's you There's a podcast that might really help. is called My Life withith Demmentia from Demmentia UK an award winning show where real families share what life is actually like alongside warm practical advice from Dmentia UK's specialist admiral nurses who support families every day It's a bit like having a chat with people who properly understand your world You know, you get those, oh, it's not just me moments, and ideas for handling the tricky bits And a bit of calm when you're having to make big decisions about the person you love all while you're on the train, walking the dog or hiding in the kitchen with a kaa Subscribe now to My lifeife with Demmentia on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts You want to get your backyard summer ready, but you don't want to break the bank? Wayfare gets it. Pning on dining alfresco or relaxing poolside Wayfair has everything you need to prep your space. 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Acast Acast d. com slash advertise I'm a huge fan of you and your podcast and also adored watching you on Task Master We need the unedited clips of your stories. They're long, they're long. I'm going to be so excited if you read this on the pod. Well I readason it. Sorry if this is a long one, we love a long one. I found out I was pregnant at thirty two weeks I know, crazy, right. I had absolutely no idea, no symptoms or signs or anything. Anyway, he's four now. He was also a massive booby monster and I exclusively breastfed him until he was three and a half. Oh my god, that's adorable. Not that I wanted to, but I tried everything and he just couldn't let it go. It was his comfort, his everything. He finally stopped when I put nail varnish That was made for nail biters on my nipples and he finally accepted no more boobies I do still co sleep some nights and he'll still say mummy milk and just want to hold my boob, which is quite sweet. I just thought I'd send you and James this crazy story and to say how much I love you. I'm from Cardiff, but now live in Cheltenham. Keep me anonymous, but if anyone who knows me listens to this they'll know it was me. Thank you. Oh my god, what an absolutely adorable message. That is so, so lovely. Oh my god, you sound like just the most incredible mother and that is just so sweet