The Saga of Bennett the Doll

The McLrooy Bothers are not experts And their advice should never be followed Travis insists he's a experxt. But if there's a degree on his w. I haven't seen it Also, this show isn't for kids which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening What's up, you cool baby s of something beautiful. A small acquaintance has blossomed. It's wped into a precious friendchhip. I could have never seen what was com for me. Hangs at the skate park hangs by the beach My love. It feels like It's b, it's b with you A It's b' is It's It's better too Hello everybody, Welcome to my brother, my brother, and me A advice Show for the modern era. I'm your oldest brother Justin McRrooy What's up, Trav Nation? It's me, your boy, Travis Mcrooy, coming to you live for the studio. Big news. Yeah. Griffin. Go ahead. Okay, Ghe. I got some big news change the order because it sureuck can change the It is weird me because we build to Griffin. Yeah and that's always I will say this ten out of ten times antilimactic. You know I mean? it's like almost always a decline in the. I don't have bits. I don't have characters. I give the people what they want. No question. This isn't a bit, It's big news about trav nation. Oh wow. No, It's not about my custom umbrella line. That's coming septtember twenty twenty seven. Keep your eyes out, preorders open now Bye I've been invited to join a content house Fuck, yeah, dude, one of the big ones. What man. Did you get fuckking one youise. I've been invited to join Purina Proplan slash Country Croc Presents Multimedia Mansion. I've heard of that one. Yeahah, that one's that one stepped in some hot water sort of legally Lgically newswisely. clean house It's an all new crew. It's me, It's Honk Boy. It's pokey, It's big shoes. Ghost face sixteen nine.celed Honk boy. Let him finish. He's got five more Which ones did I already say? I say honky cononboy pookey U Big shoes, Ghost face sixty nine Yeah Hopster, all the big ones That's only okay. you'd only had Well, it's only five Six rooms in the mansion It was my understanding that big shoes die I thought big shoes fucking died. this is even new bigig shoes. This one does exclusive unboxings of hats. Re. I'll say Travy has big shoes to fill up Yeah Well his dad died just Tam so dude, like glad you think that's so funny, dude. Yeah, his dad died. H big shoes senior. It's not a laughing matter, man His dad died trying to fit three hundred talkies in his mouth at one time for content And and he was a parrot. So that was not healthy for him. And it was the blue talkies too. so it burned him really bad. that's really big sh Si. the parrot died so now Big shoes, Junior, the parrot has taken over the hat unboxings That's interesting. So are they all Tropical birds or No, that's fucking stupid. Pokey is a hedgehog Ghost Face sixty nine is of call it Dauty streamer and also a Labrador U Hobster is a rabbit, obviously So Is everybody an animal other than you? or I mean you boy is a goose? Okay Are you this' not a tropical bird. This is a bird. They can live in the traropic. Bake shose as a parrot. So all content creator. All of them combined have like sixty million impressions across social media and streaming. So and that's pretty good for. Goose And it's going to help my brand so much. Are you in charge of the do you have to like take care of the animals or like We all have our responsibilities What could a hedgehog's responsibilities possibly entail? Patroling the hedge ogging this up. plluging it on the head save. I am responsible for a lot of refilling things buuying things, refilling things. Yeah You play callall of Duty for Ghost face sixty nine because I don't know how idea Griffin that I would even touch his rig Oh my God, would you would you engage with another man's car Yeah. right? wouldould you steal a boat? So do Justin and I have to Do that we make all our content together. A we part of the contract in or what's the deal What will be a bit of a shift for my content? I think that we're okay, kind just say this I'm very excited because I've always wanted to be whenever you watch the great YouTube family content that I think everybody enjoys and celebrates it is completely unproblematic. There's always like a disinterested older brother who seems like he's headed to sports and that's I feel like I would be so good at that role. Like I'm not really like sometimes you do the pranks on me and maybe like you'll paint my whole room blue, but I'm not like having to do any of the stuff. Like maybe we'll play hide and seek in Camden Park like one time in a video, but like I'm mainly, it seems like I'm going to do something By. This is great. If you guys would keep these ideas coming, I'm contractually committed to produce twelve hours of content a day And that's after editing So U after Okay. Yeah. So it usually ends up being about eighteen hours of filming a day. But you know, it's just hanging out, you know, just hang with it gross. Yeah Um for fun and Tv yes it only has to be sound. There was about thirty minutes yesterday where Travis just made noises with his mouth. I mean, wasn't even I mean, it's content, you know, J that twelve hours of it is usable and bable You've got that duoinger duo linger partnership where Honk Boy is trying to teach you goose language. Yeah. and that's pretty. And how's that going, Trap? We actually had to edit that way down because I goose, please. because I My accent is apparently horribly offensive to the community. Yeah. Yeah. And interestingly enough to swans as well, there's a crossover in my acc basasically they're the same bird. Thats Oh my go, Griffin, please don't let Hawkoy hear you say that. incredibly insensitive We just how do whole sensitivity training on species Yeah stuff. I actually was the only one required to attend now that I'm thinking about it Yeah, I heard that you you pretended to sit on the hedgehog one whose name I forgot already and then you'd stand up holding your butt like ouchchie, ouchchy. And that's I didn't enjoy that. Number one thing that hedgehogs like fucking hate man. She didn't wr like when you pretended poke I saw sorry. I just got I just got. Oh, I'm out of the house Ah, Dang Tv, I'm sorry Is it because you're doing this right now and it's not Okay. I have other opportunities. have Trv Don't worry. I have a business plan for you that I hit pon this week actually Oh great. Yeah. because I owe them a lot of money now. We're gonna get you out Yeah. I saw TikTok about how It was a little bit watching the TikTok was bad because it's unnerving. The basasically the prompt of the TikTok was the basis of the TikTok was There are YouTube channels that are YouTube is activating this like auto translating feature, right? So it just like auto translate these videos from other countries, auto translate them into English. The concern is that like in this world of, you know, a Mr. B style ramp up to like the most incendiary, the most whatever, we will outsource our content creation to poorer countries But less to other nations where people might be exploited and that will be translated in English, right That that was the unnerving subiject to the TikTok. And then the worry would be that basically like this gets outsourced to other countries My question is was slightly different is that Okay. How do we get that worked out the other way? where we make So we' getting know we're like Yeah So I feel like maybe we'd hit big if we were getting auto translated into other countries Do you know what I'm sayingike We have been maybe like English locked And maybe our real audience is a German speaking crowd or a Japanese speaking.y we's like a wee like they get Hasselhoff kind of deal. Yes, exactly. Yes. Travis. Yeah we never charted here in America, but you put us like in Germany or Finland or something number one. The technology is there now Travis. for us Yeah think about global Think about how Big Hasslehoff could have goted it if he had AI on its sign. Yeah. Wh better than Google's AI enine to take R Twisted brand of comedy. Yeah. repurpose for the Venezuelan audience and just like give a You know what some cultural references here and there. Yeah you would need to not just translate word for word. They wouldd have to be like, I don't know how big like Morbius was. know for the Morbius episode, they would have to choose like the Venezuelan equivalent of Morbius when we translated a u Solan's book into Chinese The translator reached out to me and said, I'm really struggling with this bit where you said you feel like he man slamming a Capri sun We have Capri's son, but we don't have Hean That's weird, that is not the one that I thought. I know. So he saidays, is it sort of like Monkey from Journey to the West? Asolutely. Y. Okay, ye just swap Yes. you will feel like a monkey from Journey to the West sllamming Cap suun. hundred percent. You got it Control F Battle cat Right replace like Nimbus Cloud. When they they said is it like monkey from Journey to the West? wereere you like I should have made that the reference to begin with. That's b U Justin, I thought you were going to go a different way, which is instead of outsourcing it to countries where people would be taken advantage of and Uh, why not Which we hate. So' I saying that? we hate We hate we've been doing this for so long, man. I hope people just assume we hate that stuff. Outsource it us So we'll make Mrter Beast content and then they can auto translate it to like how Mr. Beast would say it No one watch No one watches Mr. Beastymore. Mr. Beast tried to give away a hundred buuattis the other day and and not even in a hundred. No takers. No takers.ot fifty buugattis get al load Becauseuse he had games and he hosted his games and he said, comeome play for a billion dollars and then everyone left. I' like, we hated those games. Well he So that whole game going, donon't you guys want to be shitty to each other? And they're like, ye, I would feel bad if I had g. And he's like, but for money, you want to be shitty to each other. And it's like, wow, this is an interesting look to your We really enjoyed beast showing up on Survivor because as a millennial I had a little swell like, well, well, well, well, well, look who's on CBS. You know what I mean? Like, Well, look it's not too cool to come on our dusty ass old reality show. Yeah, you weren't the only one like that because Jeff also shriveled up like one of the creatures from Ursula's lair That made a bad deal with her Welcome beast. Please a million more dollars. Thank you, Daddy I say Is it Is it too much to call it the Beast factor? I'm freaking out with how much beast effect is going on in sururama right now. He's the king of YouTube But I felt this to be I was just watching. So credit to Jeff. I mean Yeah, he's right. I think all the money's in family based content, not our age family, but like I was going say Jeffy Jeffrey still haven't seen a picture of you with the troph from a man. wouldould love to catch a glimpse. W love yeah, I love to No it made it to HQ We tracked it. We tracked it, Jeff. It's LHQ would love a glimpse. Use it as an immunity idol in an episode. Oh my God some not as much justust making a fundamental prop in the Yeah. A game If it could be like a game winning immunity idol that comes up in the finale episode, that would be Yeahah, it would be if you could show up and wll If you could be like the McMurry Bothers gave us two million dollars to add to the prize pool and we're not going to do that. We don't have it Jack, you have to You would do it do it in our name. Yeah. It seems like all the a haawk just like grabbed a bird right off my balcony, guys Are you kidding nure? No, dude. it was a huge big bird and it swooped in and it screeched a little bit and it grabbed another bird and it went N nothing else we're gonna to do today. That's crazy about Is there something me why in your life that you've needed? guidance on like you have to be open to signs importance. like what what When the gu saw the right the universe is trying to tell you. I think the haawk is now the threat the hawk now thinks that my house is a cool hangout spot to grab little birds. You don't know what that little bird was planning, Giffin. That haawk just saved your life True. Sky Sky. He was gonna assassinate you That little bird was a spy. When I see how many V bucks these parents are giving their kids for hiding at a Dave and Busters for two straight days, I think they must be making lots of fucking cash. And I think that's where the money is. I don't want to make that kind of content with my own children. We could the three of us do it and maybe it would be kind of the same where I'd be like, you guys didn't clean your room, so now you gott to drink this Milkshake that I made out of k with a content house with six kids that aren't our kids.' my kids. I don' I think family YouTube really takes advantage of children and its there's a lot of horrible stuff. So let's instead hire child actors an industry that has never taken advantage of children, never been detrimental. Yeah. And also we want to be so clear about this 'use I don't want anybody be confused. Family, YouTube Family podcast Good G I like that. I've been taking advantage of Justing life for years now to coast off of them But we gom. Look how happy they are And our no better And our kids sometimes a little bit They like They do like it I've gotten some positive. My kids are proud of me occasionally So yeah, that feels good. I've never made my kid hide in a home deepot while they paint themselves orange How's that right I You know what I amly? a YouTube video will make my kids think that real happy families set up bouncy castles in their living room to sleep in for the night. and I have to explain to them that one All the lights are on and they're filming it. so they're not sleeping. We watch those videos where it's like, I turn my house into a trampoline park. I always there's a bit where someone like jumps into a chandeler and breaks it and everyone's like, That's always where I pause it. and I see I say, that's exactly why. That's exact. That's why we don't have that They're having fun, they're doing a good job. That's someone chandly or someone worked hard. I answ Al's not. can My kids watch so much YouTube that they think there's a nonzero chance Markro Bear is going to blow up their home with elephant toothpaste at any moment. You know what I mean? At any moment, Markro Bear could come in here and blow up this whole place with Ephant toothpe. It's Mark Rover, but I do love the French like I mock ro No, no, listen. I've done a lot of sp slabs No, that's the evil version. I've done a lot of his crunch labs. It's Mark Robert It's okay, it's Mark Rberer. I. It's M Robert. I've watched this show on Netflix. It's Mark Robbert. I think it's Mark Robot I think it's Mark Robert. And Are you children ready to build an ocillescope?' not Mll. Mark, do your parents have homeowners' insurance?? you want to send us a qu b and let us know if it's Robert or I think you may want to switch what after to the punch H us some advice? Let's help. Yeah want to Yeah. Yeah. I want to help. I work in a nonprofit and per my contract, I have a stipend that I can spend on personal and professional development I've used some of it tomorrow learn a new language. However, a company newsletter listed a few more options. One of which is a clown or treat where I can quote Learn about what clowning means to me My job has nothing to do with clouding And my girlfriend definitely wouldn't approve. Is it irresponsible for me to go on a free Clownning retreat for my own enjoyment on company dollars Please help. question to if I did go You think it's assume I would bring my own nose and clown makeup, but that's from clown. Now you're not taking it now you're not taking. Now you what? That was the that was the hinge of the question for me The hinge of the question for me was was br I bring my own clownos and makeup? You don't think they send an email ahead of time to let you know what kind of Can I tell you how many underwear andively If the classes find out what clowning means to you It seems to be like the first like calling The first Like let's weed out. You know, is to see does clowning mean to you Bring your own note, be prepared, or I will earn the nose and I will earn the makeup If I have to figure out the right clown white to bring in where I'm not going to get beat up by the big kids. I'm not going to go. It's got to be provided for me. okay? I mean, I know Right? justust not have a different chace. Yeah. I agree in this stuff. Okay. This is my area of expertise Right. Clououting is an art that is not limited to the nose A lot of people forget this that I had a masterclass with Marcel Mor. I never forget this. A lot of forget that Marcel Marceau came to Marshall University in two thousands. Mars Mars University. Marcel Marceault came to Marshalle in the two thousands. Mark Robert. With Mark Robert. while I was a student there. and before or after he performed a show at the Keith Alby, he came to the Marshall University Theater department And today masterclass for us. And so I Don't think I think to say I've been trained by Marcel Marceal gives me some leg to stay on here and I can say clowning is so much more than a nose to Wh wasn't he a mime? Mime's his clowns, duder. That's what I'm saying. Wh. Yeah. Yeah, dude. It it's all part of comedy th art You know, Justin, I also had a masterclass at the University of Oklahoma from Larry Drake, AKA Dr. Giggles and the guy with the sash in that one episode of Firefly Yeah And he was asked if he prefers doing drama or comedy. And he said drama is like, o, but comedy is like, Hey. and I'll never forget that. W, I think I just learned a lot by the transitive propertty. Yeah. so that's awesome. Dam, that's good. Yeah So I think I also know a lot about comedy. I think you're assuming a lot You will be asked to apply clown makeup NNO's and do clown stuff because that does not sound like the concept of this this retreat, it sounds like you'll find do a deep soul searching to find what clowning means to you When someone introduces the word retreat into the formula for me, it does imply a level of Getting in touch with myself in a way that I'm like Oh, no, thank you. If it was a clown class that lasted three days thing. yeah, one hundred percent. a retreat I think that it could help you maybe, maybe the angle is like find the vulnerability in yourself Isn't that clowning Isn't that clowning? you get down deep, you find the things that you're embarrassed of and then you just like put them out. beg people to laugh at them for your own humiliation gink. I think I've lost the plot a little bit. you werese. Yeah. earlier on in the sentence. I think we could all remember the house You had some great points. Yeah two thirds of that sentence, absolutely. Th those were the days. I have a running analysis in my head of Handsome guy, fununny like stars Wh it's like where they go into movies and it's like, I've been handsome for a while, but now I want to do funny movies. Okay. And there are some who are so good at being like, I don't need to be cool. I think John Cena is great at this where John Cena is willing to look stupid and be the butt of a joke and so many things. He'll tear his chest open and show you his heart and everything insideight. He has no problem looking like an idiot There's some other ones where even when they're supposed to look like an idiot, they're cool. And it doesn't work So I like I do like if I could go to a clown or treat that would teach you to finally Just being so handsome all the time. being so handsome and cool. I just let myself be a bit of a fool from time to time That might be very useful for me I What if you love it too much and you can't turn the cloud off? Oh, maybe is that what your girlfriend's afraid of? What if you can't turn the clown off? Maybe you find the clown and you awaken the clown and you're all of a sudden, you're the disguise Yeah, like Bruce Wayne to Batman where he he is Batman He is lagh Ban for real. he was born? I'm a leftgh man. Fm Batman And then when he was like twelve, he made some money at a lemonade stand and he came inside with a suit and he's like, I'm go by I'm go by Bruce now That's not exactly what I meant But yeah. yeah That's exactly. his parents got killed in the alley. They were like, helpelp us, Batman. And he's like, I can't. I'm Bruce now I'm Bruce now. Bruce can't fight I want to got an identity that would strike fear in the heart of no one Murderer, will you spare my parents for this many dollars I do you like the idea because the comedy put the option in the newsletter. But you take it and then they're like, Ohh, we didn't buy Test. Absolutely a test. Yeah And it's not clowning's not bad But they don't it's not you sell for your job. Y skill says. No there are plenty of like I know people who do corporate improv workshops and Shakespeare workshops and stuff. It's about getting in touch It's the retreat aspect of it that if you get it, hereere's the problem with the retreat You get there day one, you've been there ten minutes and the vibe is off for you and And you're like, oh, this isn't what I signed up for. You can't leave Yeah, you're in prison. You're in clown prison. You're stuck in a clown car with a bunch of other clowns, but you don't wantan to be a clown. You're just Dave You know what I mean? It's You thought it would be funny to use this corporate money to go Clown retreat but then you're fair. It is funny. I'll say this. No, it's funy story. It's funny. Yeah, I mean' clown's funny. It's funny in hindsight, you have to live through it You have to experience it with your human body and mind. and then after that it will be funny, but you do have to endure the initial thing I think. Pain is funny leaving the body. bosses want you to take the lessons of these retreats, like an improv retreat or a clowning retreat. Y bosses don't actually want you to bring that energy back to the office, right? If your boss is like, Justin, you did a bad job on your reports and you looked at him and you're like, yes. and mean You know what I mean? He doesn't want that. He wants actually for you to do a better job at your thing. He doesn't want you to reach up and go He wants you to do better at the reports. They want you to bring the energy of someone who got a clown or treat paid for them and now they feel special That's right. They're got to work a little harder. And they're working harder. 'use they got away with something They don't want clown technque to come back into the office. They want clown the clown energy, clown satisfaction. Clown mentality clown work ethic. There you go. Cown grind What? Willingness to be humiliated. Come back as the joker. Oh shit. Yeahah. You don't get to choose I'm pennywise. Oh no. Oh no. It was a retreat Thanks for the retreat, busoss. I'm gonna go eat a kid. no. No bad news, your HR director is Penntyw. Over the past month, I've been going to phhysio for a shoulder and neck issue During one of the first sessions, I was asked to use a grip strength tester I the highest LBs the clinic has ever seen Since then, some of the staff at the clinic have been calling me Mr. Grippps be ster I'm not sure how I feel about the new names. Do I curb them or let them slide? That's from Grip Strength Gripe in Canada. Shouldn't they let you leave What are you doing If you're doing physical therapy And they're like, here's the git machine. And they're like Shouldn't you be in charge? on they to start gripping it. Once they passed the grip machine, they then handed them a big mallet and said, now hit this paddle and if you can ring the bell You get to go. And that's where it failed. You know what I mean Yeah, Do you think as a physical therapist There's a moment where you get them to the point where they're like probably as good as they used to be But do you think sometimes you're like Damn I think these guys are really good potential. Like I think if I keep physical therapying them, I think they could become a professional athlete. Like is there's a ceiling here that I can get them back past. You know what I mean? You just You never know when to stop the therapy. That's probably only like one in a hundred times. you know? It's probably pretty rare. I agree. ye I agree All I'm saying is that if I did a grip strring t. If I did any test at of place And they said I did the best anyone ever That's going to become at least twenty to thirty percent of my personality from now. Travis, that was maybe the least surprising sent. I know ever been noted on the program. I could have written it with my blood. I mean Yeah, man. then will it surprise you to know Justin when I found out two and a half years ago, the grip strength testters existed. I immediately bought one. You did. I remember that because you made us all do it and mine was bad Mine was really, really m was very good I have grip muscles built into my hands. You see those hands. Look at those grippers. God d those muscles next to my thum. I'm crazy dude. Those grippers got seventeen rubber bands Not even double looped. seventeen Rber brands, that was his grip strength rating Pretty goodot. Yeah. It goes up to like six thousand. Like Travis is doing like six thousand. He's got like watermelon and crushing power I'm out here because inevitably one of you will slip and slide off a cliff and I'll dive and catch you by the wrist and I want to be able to hold you because I love you. Yeah, but what if you're the one that falls off and you guys working hard. We're like, you gott to let us go, Trav. You got to let us go. You're too heavy and And you're like, I can't man. My griper is too powerful. I have been dealing with this in my left hand because I've been recovering from from carpal toel surgery and I'm'm, you know, I'm a few months in now And I am now starting to get to the point where like Is this as good as it was? Was it better than this? I don't remember it being better or worse. I don't remember how good it was before. So I'm kind of like trying to f feel that out. like, yeah, I think it could be a little bit more movie. Yeah, right. This is every time I watch a show where they do some kind of like, we're doing a challenge, right? And it's like we took our biometric measurements before and after I That's the part I most envy The idea of I'm about to do something for a week and someone's gonna to tell me the masure of change of like, yeah, this improved, this went down. just perfectly like figure out a sequence of events where it's like, yeah, every week he's just getting stronger and stronger. Travis like I must have more data about Travis. There must more I can know about myself So many numbers are slipping away from me I had the thought for the first time like a couple days ago that people who like go to the gym to lift weights to get stronger They probably have a moment pretty frequently where they lift a new heaviest weight And I had the thought of like That's probably cool. That probably feels pretty cool. No I can do three hundred now. I don't know how if that's good or bad or like what I mean, it depends on what exercise you're doing. like you three hundred. you're nailing a measurement, I would say also. But like if you couldn't do three hundred before and then you practiced And you worked hard and you ate like a bunch of cod or whatever. and then the next day you could do three hundred, you'd probably be like fucking stoked because you're Griffin, I was thinking about something similar to that. If I I was thinking about how if you were to practice at like, u I say chess and then you played chess And then your score at chess improved Um you would probably have a positive feeling you derivive from that. I Or I if you started playing an instrument And like you found a really challenging piece of music that you weren't able to play. But then you practiced and you got better guys are making fun You guys are talking in a tone that'ound similar No Travis that's a similar experience to what Griffin outlined Andike of course inside ch got a better at chess and your ELO went up that'd be cool. And if you could play a musical piece, that would be cool. I'm talking about Like if you started runningning kept track of the time, it took you to like run a mile Yeah Yeah Th then for that tried to cook a meal and you couldn't and then you studied cooking for a year. and then at the end of that year you cooked that same meal again. No, That's different. This is your body. Like if you didn't know how to read Right? So then you started learning to read and then you knew how to read. that would probably feel pretty good You guys are making fun of me for fucking' sure, dude I don't think so. I don't think I am travel wereere you? 'cause I wasn't. but maybe I travel I was. I was trying to back up Griffin's points with otherers. I don't know how much I can pick up. I don't know how much I can pick up. I know that if someone asks me to move a couch and they're gonna to help, I can usually do it. But that's not that doesn't translate to a number. If I had a number I disagree because I think you're picking traamor laying down really well I don't w to get squish. Let's to the mudd zone. I just don'tan to get I don'tift weights 'cause I don't w to get squished Nxually Is that a? Is that a L here Smalls is the best cat food I've ever purchased. and friends, I've bought them all, but my cats are wild for this stuff. I've got the timing down perfect, the small show up. right when I need it. There is a honestly, there is a bag of treats that comes with my smalls every time I get a shipment and if I didn't have it couldn't get the cats out of the girl's bedroom in. No, I've seen this work It's incredible. I've seen it in action It is like you have a remote control cat. It's crazy. Yeah. It's wild. It's ' they go crazy for this food. they go the same thing happens when I tear up a package of smalls. They go they go wild for it. It's preservative free, human grade ingredients. it's good natural stuff you find your f. Doid it ever happen if you open a package that just sounds like a package of smalls and they run in the room and then they're really angry that it's not smalls h Yes, one hundred percent of the time, Travis. In fact, you might say that if we open the fridge sometimes the cat will leap onto Sydney's shoulder like some sort of deinted furry parrot just trying to get some smalls. They're wild for this stuff and your cats will be too. Stopving sound like a problem. I'll just say feedback on the ad. You're making it sound like your cats are like smalls junkies They aren't the They are. so I love it in a good way But in' good ways Okay I'm saying it sounds like your cat has a problem. much My cat has a problem because it's mean. That's not smallmalls' fault. It's a cruel creature Do you understand like it's which emotions? Which is your favorite? One of Justin's cats is famously meaner. Th he has two cats. I have a litter box Stop serving your little carnivore a bowl of process shortcuts For a limited time because you're a Min Mam listener, get sixty percent off your first order plus free shipping and free treats for life. When you head to smallalls d. com slash my brother That's sixty percent off your first order plus free shipping and free treats for life. When you head to smalls d. com slash. My brother I have Jasmine in my home and what I've learned about Jasmine is basically she's the type of cat that is just the world's Cumsiest and least effective assassin where she'll see me going into a room, she'll run ahead of me, hide behind the couch, and then dive out at me and boot my leg and then run back behind. And I imagine laugh at her success J Just a funny kittdy story for you guys That was chilling, bud Yeah, man. You don't want to hear tell funny kid We don't use We just listen to a kittie story from Justin. Justin's was a paid kidyie story. They had pid me to tell a kidy. You know what they also didn't like this at the content house when I was telling them about my pets at home. And I think every time I use the word pets They got really old Yeah, they don't even understand the idea. How can a man own a goose What is a man to a goose? What is a man to a goose? Hey Max funun listeners. It's me, Jackie Kishation. I have a podcast with Laurie Kilmartin. sayay, Hi, Luri. Hi, Jacqueline. Hi Max fun listeners. But not very formal. We have a podcast and it's about standu comedy and how much we love it and how much we dislike some of it. So listen to that podcast. It's called the Jackie Laurie Show. We drop new episodes every Wednesday that gives us plenty of time to decompress from our comedy weekends and discuss things with sane level heads. No, it doesn't. if you are a woman our age or a man our age Or you know what? any person of any age, I think you'll enjoy your pcast. Jackie and Laurie Show on maximumfun. org bye Are you a celebrity Are you searching for meaning, connection and a little levity these days I'm Camele Nanciiani, actor, writer, and yes a celebrity too And I've got four words for you Bullseye with Jesse Thorne. Are you tired of junkets carpets, sick of the endless spicy snacks you have to eat Do you want to connect with someone who gets your work laugh with you a little. Join me, Andre three thousand, Tom Higs, Tina Feay, and many more and become a guest on Bullseye with Jesse Thorne. from NPR and maximum fun. Hunted Doll watchatch. you know, there's a lot going on in the world of haunted items and items are we Yeah, I have, uh My summer ween is really coming. Yeah. So summer weeen time I have five I'm going to share with you guys because u they're all The worst and I wanted to show them to you guys to see which ones you all think is the worst Juy, are you still watching From? I heard they got haunted doll monsters now Yeah man, they've got everything on From. And of course, I'm still watching Fr. I remember a time where Justin said There apparently is a show that exists called From I keep seeing clips from it and I have no goddamn idea what any of them mean. Hey Juice, this one sucks, man. Oh Yeah these all hey this week, they all suck. Haunted doll Vessel young, Sy Ct white lightite witch they spirit. It's giving Cola Skola Marry Todd a little bit. just just like in the complexion, I guess Does she have just a handful of loose icing? What is that So let's see here. That's a good man try's a really good ally good question. A lot of people don't ever did to the level of Oh, that is my unicorn brooch. It's the head of a unicorn and she's threatening that other unicorn with It's the head of a unicorn. She's holding the head of a unicorn, I think is what we're dealing with there. It's people stockings. And she's coming into your world Uh Lydia is not a witch practicing white magic. She is white light magic in fae form She's connected to happiness, purity, emotional healing, self worth, emotional encouragement and light abundance just something about that that sounds like the head of a PTA board saying to a parent, the parent is like, I don't I don't think you understand like Miller Elementary spirit. And they're like, I don't understand Miller Elementary Spirit. I am Miller Elementary Sirit in human form This girl was not fully ready for the human world yet. N because she's weak because she is unbelievably innocent naive, which means she has not fully harnessed her authority. She does not naturally recognize manipulation yet. She assumes everyone is emotionally sincere. She believes everything will work out pererfectly perfect because that's her nature Must be nice For the last and true of every baby born though That is pretty much a baby experience. Are there babies that come into the world jaded U This is the next part that I can't stop thinking about. For the next three months, Lydia has had full reign of my home My Divination room, which I guess is not in the home. My spirit collection, which I guess she doesn't keep in the divination room. I got a lot of sheds The rituals, which I guess is in yet another outbuilding. And then their communication work, which must happen at yet a tertiary location It's more of a compound. Yeah. It's really yeah, it's I got a bunch of buses that I buried underground and linked with tunnels. Yeah This is my she shed and that's my se shed where I s That's my shed where the demons She has approached all of it with emotional confidence of a glitter covered four year old with absolutely zero survival instincts. Then don't give her free reign Yeah, that's I had one of those, a glitter covered four year old with no survival instincts. and I wasn't like, everything let me open all the drawers and cabinets for you. I can't imagine setting my five year old loose in a divination room. No way, man. Yeah. She even got this way. She tried to rehabilitate a little stucubus. She Yeah, she calls them sparkle resets. She says you breathe littleine Yeah, she, this is what Lydia said to her little excubus. Oh girl, you got a lot going on You never gonna get the right boyfriend with that look You need positive affirmations and self respect Meanwhile, ancient seductive sucubus energy in Lydia is talking to her like a tiny em emotionally supportive pageant coach This is like a full. So you guys think I'm just kind of like losing it right now, but I'm gonna scroll down a little bit just you can I wanna you can't about the sexy sucumus. The fucking row of This is legitimate. Oh my Godd. This is the script of this person who has like outlined this this this exchange that this ghost had with a never g she has living at her house. wait, scroll back up because ch Lydy is a toxic friend Oh absolutely. ye like Lydia truly sees good in everything Dark spirit, maybe he's just sad. manipulation, maybe it was a misunderstanding. Chaos, maybe everybody just needs a hug. Hey, Lydia, I'm trying to complain about this guy and I just need you to validate my feelings Yeah. Sparkle Reset is also the most menacing brainwashing Chit is ever. Does't they give you a clockwork orange Cockwink you get a sparkle recess. She sees sadness, anger bitterment and thinks, oh no, somebody forgot to be happy. And it's like, Hey, Lydia, depression exist. Some of us we're working through some shit. I'm giving you guys some extra ones to read here. She celebrates every tiny manifestation like they just won a spiritual Olympics That's what they call that's that is what they called the church camp that I went to. This is honestly, I y'all I cled on It keeps going. the whole This is the whole pilot. Yeah. it's it's the whole She's got a season two arc Yeah, it's a whole universe. So we're not gonna to deal with that anymore. One of the things I really like here and listen, I wouldn't call myself an expert in fe mythology, but I did say that' a rarely seen young Seey. There's no such like they've been alive for like they're eternal. I don't think they're a young Fe anyways Popular deand, we have another succubus summoned by my very spiritual friend who has experienced with conjuring and binding, and we curated this vessel especially for her. He Cy Rob brought this one to us. Nasty Dave brings I'm just realizing I didn't read the text of this one before I brought it. I just thought the picture just lik the picture so much. I wanted to see how you guys react. and only Griffin gave me one. We would have to blur this to post it on our Instagram, Justin Even just adult, you pervert, get your head out gutter. It's not just Just I' say there's some aftermet additions. There's some mods that some bo mods. I haven't looked at the picture very closely but hot too much. Okay. Yeah, there are nipples. someomeone drew nipples on it. Sorry. Let's see here. We have is a l lustful succubus spirit. U If you feel a stirring and are drawn to her pictures, perhaps you' jail al ready. You're in jail now. Go to jail. Perhaps you are already connecting with her and could fulfill her desires and fantasies She will come to invvivid dreams, but she can manifest as a shadow figure if she gains enough strength. And I'm sorry, I'm paying two hundred and five dollars.ry just to be clear For this shadow figure. For this I'm big two of five. I also once again don't know much about mythology, but I'm pretty sure the deal is a succubus is looking for someone to fulfill their desires. right sure that's not how the exchange. So that's so this says not a toy. Her vessel's top is removable, revealing an anatomically correct chest underneath. She also has a C through lace skirt with small white I'm not going to say that word underneath It also exp crazy This is not a toy. then that line and then per eBay policy, you're purchasing a tangible item A toy Let's see. The new Toy story looks weird as flock by the way. See these stills? O Uh, this is too bad. Yep. they finally got into us. They got haauntedll Mystery Bos now. You don't know what haunted thing you're going to get with this eighty dollars treat And look at that totally real hand drawn art display. Yeah hally definitely art htally. Yeah, step in the enchanting world of the supernatural with this haunted doll mystery box. insside you'll find One haunted doll rumored to carry the presence of friendly r wholesome positive spirits. We're outsourcing our hauntings to other countries and we're importing them in bublic This is terrible you imagine being a haunted doll and being told like, yeah, you're You're going to be in a blind box. What What mean? No one wanted you r. When people knew you, they did not want you. The only way we can get you in their hands is to sort of do you a gotcha style. If you have enough haunted dolls to start a haunted doll blly box company, I don't think you get to throw the word rumored in there. R Did you just buy dolls in bulk and you're like you wanted these bags. You've lost context Yeah. Are they Are they rumored? are you verifying every one of these guys as haunted as f uck S'm I'm buying an eighty dollars box. I would not do this because this is definitely how they get rid of the dolls that are too haunted. Yeah. The dolls that are like. This want to make spikes come out of your fucking balls and they'll stab you in the head while you're asleep. This is a dark, dark, dark demon And no one goes for that. they're going to show up inside the blind box. It's also irritating from somebody that just like, I'd like to maintain cannon within Haunted Doll Watch. I like to maintain you know, cafe I feel like every practitioner of these arts tell you how important it is to find The spirit that sort of works with you and like makes sense for you and not like fucking fired out of a t shirt cannon just whatever random thinkink about this, even in a world where you believe these are haunted, what these people are saying is we'll box up a random fucking soul and send it to your house. Like ye, you wouldn't that with doorash, right? You wouldn't say like, hey, I need a friend Will you come over and hang out with me? fucking anybody in the world. Doesn't matter. Im do that with. I'm hungry. just bring whatever food you find ling around. Yeah whatever you're near, whatever restaurant is around At this point, you're not an eBay vendor. I do think you qualify as a necromancer once you start sort of slinging around randomized haunted dolls in this manner Sad. U twoo quick ones. just this is a pallet cleanser. We don't even have to talk about this hauntter. They' v nipples on this pallet cleaner. No, I wanted to step you guys down. We're gonna go out in the chill out real quick with like Leo or just. S, I need like Leo. God damn. Inflation has has absolutely savaged the haunted doll market. Y you would sevs You would they have two thousand and fifteen transactions a hundred percent positive Yeah ye. Wow.' throwing heat, man. I can Leo is amazing. With his ability I sorry, Leo is amazing. D you read title, Justin? The title' great. Thank you. Haued doll, actctive Spirit, positive Leo rambunctious prankster. And you watch listening at home, just sort of imagine like a cat's from cat, like a Yeah Kimbers Shanks type Imagine a skimble shhanks Scary like even scarier. Rambunious prankster does sound like a euphemism that a parent uses for their horrible child to try to get them into the fancy daycaare in town Uhhuh. Okay, he's o yeah, he's a Rampbunctious, prrankster Yeah. All right, Timmy just pushed my kid in the river. Yeah He's a He is rambunctious like that This is good. I accept items that are considered seriously haunted If it's haunted and it feels like it could be too dangerous for you or the people you love. contontact me and we'll see about getting it out of your hands. No questions asked unless about the item itself. Well now Well I mean no questions. S questions out. So all questions. I mean You're saying you w't ask a question that I cannot reasonably ration into some reason that it would be connected to the doll in any way. You guys want drugs? I got them. no questions asked except for which drugs you like and want and whether I have them and how you'll be paying and how you'll pay and what they do to your brain and body I won't ask questions about you. Yeah. How about your own personal life? I won't ask your address. Yeah. Last one and you guys are a little Im sure it for this guy I love this guy. I might get him myself honestly, and I never I never get these guys. I never do this. Oh damn, so we got Oh man one. It's me haunted German no Vessel child spirit Bennet active mischievous loving boy It does, I'm gonna say this, Justin in an alternate universe. Let's tell me. what is it about? In which Justin Mcroy was born in Victorian, England and maybe went through a scarlet fever or two. This is that looks like two year old Justin Mcroy. Yes, it's a beautiful boy. And hees, it comes with my own entertainment. I have a copy of Bear in the fly, a story by Paul O' Winter and a picture of four of the oldest kids you've ever seen in your entire. How are those kids? These kids are forny. That for old children. And yes, I pict at a retirement party from the business we started. this like photo cube that the card is sitting on, like this is a fully staged production here for Bennett and Benneter mother I'm ready, mother I found my life. picture of my hair is perfect. Bennet. You want to know about Bennet, of course, yeah. A little guy found the little guy back in twenty fifteen in an antique shop at New Orleans The antique shop owner told me he'd been sitting untouched for quite a while becausecause people could not decide whether he looked sad confused or mildly offended by humanity Personally, how are that is mutually exclusive Yeah, ye. personersonally, I thought he looked like trouble And I like that. you made it w. made me laugh because he was a bit judgy The second I picked him up, I swear I heard the emotional equivalent of a sigh likeike he was looking at me thinking H Absolutely not What is what is wrong with you in your day to today that you pick up a doll and you think this doll thinks I suck And I love that. And I love that. I love those gress. I will reite me for Phil. Re Re me for Philth Benet it'll make you love me I love this boy. I took him home I can fix him. I think Bennett would look great on yourself. Besides, what is one more man in my life telling me what to do? Of do Is that? Do it say that? It says that. I didn't write that. Oh I don't realize that I noticed the name written beneath his wig when I got home, Shirley Navarre Naturally my first response was, ooh, creepy. I like that. All right, dude, fucking we get it. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah Well, it also tells me a lot that the first thing you did when you got home was take his wig off Yeah. You gotta check it. you gott to check it for wig Wig bug, stp. Yeah,sp. You can' bring a new haunted doll a vessel into your house and get wigbugs everywhere. This person is the same person that writes these incredibly long screeds, but I did want to highlight this Oh boy. I a little bit of a Okay One image repeated during my sessions with him, a fountain, not a little gallering fountain either. a massive decorative estate fountain filled with goldfish. He was reaching in and putting them in his pocket. I said, Why would you do that? And Bennett intuitively said The toilet is basically an indoor pond if you stop being negative for five minutes. Then after a very dramatic pause, he added, It was a scientific experiment and everyone Oreacted. Apparently this is a source bot What was the experiment, Bennet pissing in the fountain pissing the f. No, he flushed the he flushed the fish down the turilet. There was a prank You just didn't get it. It was a prank and an experiment and the fact that you don't understand it. I was trying to start a family vlog channel and it was eighteen twenty three, so like then it wouldn't even know what to do with you. Yeah. this continues for quite some time actually, and it is just A long history of this small German ghost bullying this woman into submission. I don't blame her for wanting to get rid of Bennett. He seems like a real dingleberry what's it say at the bottom? Oh, the entertainment purposes only. Oh no, okay. I do I guess legally, you're right, Griffin EBay rules, I need to inform you that this is for entertainment purposes only and you arere buying a tangible item I'm not responsible for the behaviors you may experience But you can't say I didn't warn you. You should say that part before the other part. Like you should totally break the story at the end. Don't break it in the middle. For the eBay items, it's like pay me a hundred dollars and I'll have a witch cast a spell that makes your dick bigger. What do they say at the bottom of those? What you a little what you do, you get a little scroll like in Wizard of Oz, you know, where he handed in the thing that said he had like a great brain or whatever Yeah and it's just a tiny scroll that says like better dick. know it' like a little and it's like read this out loud, maybe or not. I don't know the exact mechanism of it. I've never had to order one. I just order harem of virtual succuby that live in my home I did say it scroll by quick there that Shirley Navre previous doll owner that apparently Andy Style wrote her name on the boy's head on his wig. Yeah What if that's how Andy had marked Woody W he just had a neck tattoo that said Andy on it. And these are manies he drew on You are a toy These are more a tangible item. Why don't Th these are my? Anatomically correct nipples. They should have a Hunta doll character in the movies where it's like No, no, no, you don't understand. It's like She comes to life, but she's like kind of alive all the time. And the life that she has is different. It's from ours. It's not like ours, how like we kind of sparkle with fun and joy. I hear you talking, Woody. H you see. You hear how she does have partner? The way she sounds sometimes freaks for out. You hear partner out I'm usually talking about toy stuff But he's over there talking about like, You have weird balls. G them out. Let me see like Thank you so much for listening to our podcast. It's called My Brother, My Brother, Me. Even after all these years, we stuck with it. Remember it. We got new merchandise for you. This is your last chance actually, your last crack at our May merch. G Count Donut Vault sticker by Nate Friedberg. you can make any vault. into a caape vault And don't talk to me until I've had my podcast mug and an I like all butts and no government mug with a digital cross stitch pattern of that as well. So a lot of great stuff in there Also, I wanted to just give a shout out, let y'all know Our dad is going to be in seventeen seventy six at the Keith Al be coming up this summer. I'm sure we'll talk about it more, but like He plays I don't know how you feel about America now or even America then. But our dad been around by then Yeah, Wh knows? Who knows? I want to say thanks to Montaine, Pucer theme song, My life is better with you Um Just listen to that Montaine app of off menu. So delightful, so entertaining. I have to say this important announcement. I'm so sorry, but Monday, june first at around eight fifteen We're doing the brush ceremony So yeah. So if you want to have your name read there, please head on over to maximumfund. org forward slash join Any news supporters through eleven fifty nine PM Eastern onn may thirty first. And you will have your name read into the brush that increases desire Also worth noting, we are moving Cubhouse back a week to accommodate Griffin traveling.