Future Novels and Unusual Facts

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So you can focus on the stuff that actually makes your business the business that you and your customers love. Square , we do the square stuff, so you don't have to. Visit square. com or find us in Curriesg in Aroth. Square up Europe Limited is authorized by the Financial Conduct Authority. Hi everyone and welcome to this episode of Little Fish , the podcast from the makers of Big No Such Things A Fish where we throw away our facts and we look at the fantastic facts that you guys have been sending to podcast i. com Andy has gone through the inbox and he's picked the very choicest of plums and thrown them in our faces and we will now regurgitate them for you. So was this horrible ? That's the problem with starting a sense where it' yous don't know where it's going to go . I hear you . Who's gonna chuck a plum by way? Can I vomit up a little something? Yes, please. Because it's related to actually last week's episode of a Little Fish. It's about Shaggy. Oh, I remember all that time ago we talked about the similarities between Shaggy and Puero. So much happened in those seven days. Yeah. I know it seems like a year ago. Yeah. You're wearing the same clothes though. Yes . I've actually changed my baseball cap so that people looking at video will think it's a different day. All right, sorry now I've just exploded the fiction. Well, this is from Don Wilson and Don Wilson says last night I was re watching Scooby Doo. Scooby Doo on Zombie Island, in fact, and I was reminded of a strange coincidence. Shaggy from Scooby Doo's real name is Norville, Norville Shaggy Rodgers. So Norville is the character's real name. Shaggy, the music artist , his real name is Orville. Is that really? Whoa. Norville Norville. Norville and Avale the only two Shaggy's we know Norville and Orville. That is amazing. I didn't know what Shaggy the artist's real name was. No . I actually didn't know either but everyone else who was very well versed in Norville being Scooby Doo. They come up in quizzes all the time. Do they? They do. There we go. Norville and novel and what is Scooby Doo but a crime solving bunch of people, as is Puero, who, as previously discussed , is very similar to Shaggy in ways we mentioned last week. So where are you going to come full circle? Yeah. Back where I started, I suppose. Does anyone else can noise join this group Torville, I suppose? Tove and Christopher Christopher Torville, Jane Torville, Torville and Christopher Dean. Yeah. Jane Torville for international listeners. You'll know who they are. Also ville, the duck from Awish I could fly right up to the sky but I can't yep. Is that we saying the duck before Orville Wright ? I think Alville the Duck was named after Orville Wright. Right, okay, okay, but it's good that the dock is the first one now that comes to the people's heads. It's certainly my head. Very good. Here's one. This is from Cameron Smith who recently went to Train World Brussels , which looks stunning by the way. I've looked it up. But there was an exhibit in Trainworld Brussels on Belgian inventors who contributed to the Wilder Steam locomotives. And one such example of an invention was flame tubes and those are the ducts that guide the steam close to the fire, right? To superheat the steam inside an engine. You know, you need to heat it up and up and up. So you have a tube that goes near a flame tube that goes near . And what are they called? Flame tubes. Oh, okay. Well, really they're more flam tubes because they're invented by an engineer called Jean Baptiste Flam. Oh God. Yeah, but they're not named after him. That's just a coincidence, right? Or are they? Cameron doesn't relate it's close enough, I thought that. Is it? Well, Cameron thinks so and I'm back in Cameron. So Cameron thinks they're named after Flam even though they,'re called flame. Yeah. Well, they might be flam tubes. The thing is it's all translated. Like there's very little information on these tubes in English , which is annoying. But in Belgium, Cameron also, I believe, went to see a big hole in the ground , the Huge Crater , which is named after the nearby village of Hooch . Isn't that good? Cameron says this epoem isn't nearly as good as Flam tubes, but if we're ever going to get enough for a book. Some are going to be better than others. And I think these guys would disagree with you there, Cameron. I hardly disagree, Cameron. That's why that's why you're not up here with us. I'm afraid. The huge holes you got to lead with that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I just ask, Andy? Yeah, these things which are taking over our lives, can we just keep them in one box? Like either little fish or short because at the moment they're in two thirds of our output is largely these things . And I'm sure the only reason they haven't been in the big show is because you haven't thought of any . Do you know that's really fair? Which would you rather they were in? Little fish or drops align? Which do I listen to at least often? You know, you should be like me and only listen to the rest is politics because they never mention . They've got no juice at all on this game . No, no. Okay, thank you, Cameron. I loved it. Here is a fact from Sarah Nordmark and they say, I hope you haven't heard this one before. I have not heard this, Sarah. Or Sarah, actually, but it's SARA. The American mathematician R H Bing did not have actual names for his initials and was just called RH . When Bing applied for a visa, he was told that initials would not be accepted. He explained that his name was R Only Only thing and received a visa made out to Hondley Ronley Thing That's very good How can he not have, did his parents name him RH? They did. His father was called Rupert Henry Bing, so he's basically been named after his father. It appears that they've not taken the actual names. That's really interesting. I've never heard that as a name cust om before. It's cool. I was reading about Professor Bing and one cool thing I read about him. He sounds like a bit of a fun character and he was driving a car with a bunch of students in his car and he was driving two hundred miles away so it was a long old drive, but there was a load of like teenagers in his car. So the car gets really, really steamy and all the windows start to steam and while he's driving he uses the windows and the steam to write out equations and does a lecture for the students in his car. What? While he's driving while he's driving that's crazy. That's got to be banned somewhere in the highway code. There's got to be allowed to know they have a thought of everything. His last lecture But maybe I suppose on these roads across bits of America where they're very long and very straight and you just like drive this way for ten hours. He's from Texas, so it is just straight wheels everywhere, isn't it? Wow, that's very cool. Yeah. I wonder if he's right handed you because they drive they have their wheel on the left, don't they? They do. Yeah. So that okay, so he's doing it with his right hand so that's well maybe better . Yeah, yeah, maybe yeah. That's that's what he said to the officer. The right handed officer doesn't make any difference . So cool. Is that my turn? Yeah , that's my turn. This is from Stephen. Hi everyone, Stephen here from Melbourne, Australia . We know where Melbourne is Stephen. No, there is a Melbourne just near London actually, so there's probably one in Canada. There's probably loads in America. Yeah , the first shots fired by the British Empire in World War I were in the southern tip of eastern Australia . I didn't know about this. As far away as you can get from Europe, he said. So it was a warning shot from and he specifies the gun a six, inch marked seven gun at Fort Nep in Victoria and august fifth, nineteen fourteen, and it was because Britain had just declared war on Germany . And at the time, I think there was a ship, the SS Falz, a steer a German merchant steamer that was just hanging out nearby. And as soon as Britain declared war, they called the Australians were like, We've declared war. Have you got any Germans nearby that you need to shoot at? They were like, actually, yeah, there's this steamer here, shall we shoot at him? And they did. And he surrendered straight away. And there we go. Australia won that was the end of the war. Yeah, they could have called an end to it there, couldn't they? Just like who calls an end to it, though? Yeah. Like that,'s the thing with Wars. You can't just shoot one thing and go, okay, that's it because the other guy's dirty undefeated this war . I got a fact this is another military one, in fact, it's from Jason Spiramillo, and it's that the USA didn't have an air force during the Second World War , which I find extremely funny is effect. Sorry. The US Air Force was established in nineteen forty seven. What planes were they using before? name. The Army had a great deal of planes, I will say that . That is interesting though. It's the US Army Air Force is what it was. Okay . So basically at the start of the First World War as well, the American military had eight planes. Yeah, I do know that. It was basically I think was it that France had like almost all the planes in the world at the start of the war and then by the end of the war everyone else had taken over it? That's true. France had something like thirty or forty planes at the start of the war, and that was more than America and Britain and Germany and loads of other countries combined. It was amazing. No, but in the Second World War, they did have sixty three thousand planes by the end of the war, but they were just the U. S. Army Air Force. So it's a bit of a technicality, Jason, I loved it Here's one speaking of World War two , the most flammable substance ever made is so evil, even the Nazis gave up on it . This was sent in by Be and basically it is a material called chlorine trifluuride which is incredibly incredibly flammable. In fact, if you just get water on it, it's just going to explode . And they tried to use it. The Nazis tried to use it as a flamethrower , but unfortunately what happened was whoever was carrying it around would end up being set on fire as well . So wait, how was that fact framed by the person that was too evil even for the Nazis? So evil even the Nazis gave up on it. Okay . Because it sounded like it was going to be, well, they weren't as bad as you think, but it was just that they kept blowing up their own. Oh yeah, I don't think that's what we should take away from . I don't think that's what Be was saying. No, no, I this stuff is incredibly flammable. Yeah , yeah, yeah. Now they still don't use it in much things at all, even in industry or anything, but apparently it works well at clearing uranium residue off the walls of nuclear power plants. What a fun place to be when that's happening . Well , I may be in this old nuclear power plant, but at least I've got the most dangerous substance in the world on me . Okay, here's one from Masha Levine who says she does a book plug. She says I've just read Zoey Schlanger's incredible book The Light Eaters . And she recommends it so highly that I thought I'd share that. She said, I should have copied and pasted the whole thing 'cause it's so full of amazing facts. And then she says, I'm going to give you two facts I loved, but there's only one here, which I imagine a c itop'ys paste error from Andy rather than from Matcha. Okay . Maybe I just thought there were reasons of time and space and we can't get into all the facts. I'm sorry to both of you. Okay Probably should have cut off that clause from the centence as well, then yeah, I feel like I should have cut the whole email given how much trouble it's got me into with Anna's diagnosions, but okay . She says the Bokila Trifolio Lata, which is a Chilean jungle vine can alter the shape color and size of its leaves to mimic nearby plants and a single plant can mimic nearby host like multiple nearby hosts and it's incredible . So I've looked at pictures and it's kind of like someone in a bit of a shit disguise as you in'll see the leaf as a human being, I think you see the leaf that's the real thing and then you see the mimic and it's trying to be like that. But even so well done for trying. It doesn't so it doesn't look that much like it. It does look enough . Leafs all kind of look quite similar, don't they? Oh, James. Leaf community, if you're listening right into podcast e dot com dot Write to James personally, please. I'm not sifting through fifty three thousand angry emails from Leaf Peepers . No way. I think of how the leaves are very varied. Okay, yeah, very irrigated, you be honest Very good . We don't know how they do it. But did you say different bits of the plank can look like different nearby other plants? Yes. Oh, that is cool. Amazing. Yeah. If I could disguise my left arm as an elephant's trunk and my right arm as a tiger's nose or whatever. It'd be an odd place. But you'd be you know, you'd be blending in with everything around you. Absolutely disagree. I think the tigers are gonna say who's that weird guy with an elephant trunk and the elephants are gonna say who's that weird guy with a tiger's nose? You're right . I'm being eaten or trampled in the mind here's a fact about leaves which I often think everyone's gonna know it but then you tell people and they don't really know it. You know holly so it's spiky if you go to the top of their holly plant, not spikey anymore . Yes. It's not spiky. It's amazing. They're only spiky. They're only spiky at the bottom. Isn't that? Because that's where they need to defend themselves. Yeah. Like now when you're walking home, if you see a holly plant and they are around , you'll see it's spiky. Look up at the top, not spikey. And if you want to avoid being jabbed, just walk on stilts in your hand. Stop the podcast . Stop the podcast. Hi everyone, we'd like to let you know that this episode is sponsored by TV licensing. James have been watching anything recently? I have been watching Game of Thrones, but not just Game of Thrones, I've been watching the prequel to Game of Thrones House of the Dragon. Absolutely amaz ing bit of television, so epic and we always try and watch it live because we know that our friends are going to be watching it and telling us all about it if we don't watch it live and that's where the TV license comes in because it did you know that the TV license not only covers you for your BBCs, your ITVs, your channel for your iPlayers, but it also covers you from live TV on paid for services such as Sky or Virgin Media. Yeah, it's such an essential thing to have. I have been caning the great brilliant panel show, Would I Lie to You Recently. They've got over a hundred episodes on BBC IPlay er. The latest series series nineteen has some of my favorite guests on it. Really, if you want to see the best of James Acaster or Bob Mortimer or Eddie Caddy or Louis Anders, that is the place to go . And that's because I got the TV license . I can watch that for my house. Well, a TV license covers you to watch over four hundred TV channels and everything on BBC iPlayer. And if you would like to find out more, go to TVL . co . uk forward slash pod . Okay, on with the podcast. On with the show . Here's one from Lindsay Lee from Nashville . Pretty cool Lindsey has written in about a paper that she's heard about , which has headlined the cultural, social and ideological role of the hat in early modern England from the historical journal and it's app,arently a brilliant paper A because it's authored by someone called Bernard Capp, very good and a bit of nonded term . But secondly because it just tells stories about the insanely important roles that hats used to play. So do you remember we talked about President Madison ? Yeah, James Madison smallest president. And he couldn't leave the house for two days once because someone had taken his hat. Hat left at the window. This is part of the paper is that appearing hatless was just unbelievably slovenly. I just can't believe Lake we came here today and you two aren't wearing hats and it was literally the first thing I thought of when the mic came on today. I was like those two. Yes, lovely . Yeah, yeah, yeah. Slatins. So there was a bloke called Thomas Elwood. He was a teenager in sixteen fifty nine, and like all rebellious teenagers he wanted to go and join the Quakers . But his father wanted to stop him, right? And couldn't think of any way to stop him, kept trying, kept banning him, kept forbidding it, and eventually had a brain wave and thought I'll just confiscate all of his hats. That's amazing. And Thomas Elwood, the young man, wrote, he couldn't go out unless I would have run about the country bareheaded like a madman. Like people would think you went seriously ill if you didn't have a hat on. It's like stealing someone's trousers. It pretty much is. It pretty much is. Incredible. Yeah. And Lindsey just includes one more story because it's full of ribbed anecdotes about hats this paper. Ribbled ones. Yeah, ribbled, I'll say. Well, judge for yourself. In seventeen forty seven, a Wiltran admitted snatching a rival's hat , pissing in it, and clapping it back on the victim's head . That's good. These days that guy would be a TikToker. He would just go around doing that to everyone and would have ten billion followers. He'd have done it once and he'd have got so many followers that he now has to rename himself the hat piss account. And now his whole life is wrecked basically forever. He's made a lot of money, but he's only mister Hatpiss right now. I can't believe he's the victim in this entire ly fictional thing that we just come up with. It's all new thing that the person who's pissing in hats and pulling it on people's head is the victim. I think he's the victim of the internet as he could have been so much more, right? He's got a thriving, you know, he wants to make proper short films and stuff like this, but instead he so pop hat piss. I think he's a pervert. I think he likes pissing in hats and the fact that the internet's here is just a coincidence . I think the internet is enabling the worst elements of this young man. Yeah. It would have been a silly teenage prank. He got detention for it Now dealing with a huge Chinese brand to do merch, hat pist merch, which is going to sell out across the Hapist stadium tour where he'll piss in all of your hats, you know? And they're probably like a new fashion for hats that look a bit like sieves Exactly . Yeah, yeah. I think that is a bit of a monster. I know this guy doesn't exist, but I do think that's a tragedy . Yeah, well we disagree. I'm sorry to say. I think I probably wouldn't have joined the historical British earthworm society were it not for this show . Do you know or the wallpaper history? I'm saying that's a trag edy for you. Well, in a sense, I am Tony Hapis. You know what I mean? So disagree . If we didn't have this show, we wouldn't know that you'd join them. That's the only big. It's a tragedy for us, actually . Honestly, if you went around pistoning people's hats rather than joining these stupid societies, I think that would be a better use of your time. Well, look out, James, because there's only one hat in this room and we've been recording for a while . Oh dear. Okay , I think we should move on to the second part of today's show and that is where we bestow custodianship of some of our best facts to some of our best listeners . We like all of you. You're all great listeners , but some of them have managed to financially boost themselves towards the top of our ranking. Some of you have ponied up and we love all of you. Thank you, I Andy. didn't know where that sentence was going either. So who has got a fact that we can give custodianship on? Michelle Hangraf has joined Clubfish at Friend of the Podcast here, which I think is what you meant, James. Did I not say that? I think you may have done. Michelle Hangraf, you are now the custodian of the fact that Al Qaeda's job application form, quite a spicy fact this one includes a question asking who should be contacted in the event that the applicant becomes a martyr . Wow, do you know what? I screen all of the headline facts to make sure and some of them I've removed because they're a bit too strong or a bit inappropriate. I think that one was probably a borderline case for me. Yeah. Yeah, it feels like it. This was the fact where we were all quite worried, I think, that our search histories would be problematic if MI five got computers because we all had to search for al Qaeda stuff. And I just remembered this is the one where I googled apply to join ISI S. So I was looking for the application form , but in the eyes of the law that's no you can't say oh guys all I was doing was looking for the application form that's worse trouble A terrorist has been found running round mud p andissing in people 's hats . Their budgets have been cut out the outsiders since the early two thousands . Here's one for you guys swallbrick . This is the fact that the single biggest expense in the computer game Lego universe was hiring human moderators to make sure people weren't building Lego penises. Brilliant. Very much a fact of its time because I bet AI could do that now. No, that's going to be the last one to fall fray . It'll be the only thing humans are doing . It'll be the resistance against the machines. Suddenly there'll just be little Lego pins popping up all over the country That's a film. That's a film to be made. It's very funny. That's very funny, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, here is a fact that is now under the custodianship of Tom Adelo and Tom , your fact is that the man who inspired the main character in Jurassic Park is now building a chicken asaurus surely not still. They are still working on all sorts of nonsense like that, aren't they like getting a w oolly mammoth and getting a woolly rhino? Yeah . Very much from the back of my head, but I think like in the last two weeks they've invented artificial eggs where they've managed to hatch chickens out of them . Yes. And they do think that this could be the first step to getting a dodo or whatever. Yes. A great ork. Great ork, yeah. Oh, which would you go for? I'll go for a great ork. Would you? Yeah. Because it's got great in it. It's just a cool bird. It's the first thing I ever researched when I got a job at QY. Is it the thing about like penguins? Doesn't a name mean great orc or something for us reversal. Yeah, all they were the original penguins. Yeah, they're just a beautiful bird that went extinct in the nineteenth century. Passenger pigeon I'd go for. Nice yeah. So you could get easy transport from your house to here No, they don't take people passengers do they. Carrier pigeon, you think . You need a lot. Here's one that goes out to Katrina Lewy, and it's that in the eighteen forties, London buses had straps attached to the driver's arms that you would yank if you wanted to stop . Really good. Bring it back . That was the bell, I guess. You press the bell except it just yanks it. It feels dangerous, doesn't it? It feels like it would yank the driver's arms because presumably he's dealing with the horses. It does, but he's riding one handed like any cool driver knows you should do. Okay , my turn . This is a fact for someone whose name is just killing time. Nice . Just killing time, kill time with this, baby. In twenty fifteen, Margaret Atwood finished a novel which will not be published until the year twenty fourteen. Brilliant, wow. And is this a few of them? They've written their future novels. They're a few famous authors who put it in this box. We imagine they're all crappy not put them in the forest somewhere or something or I might think of something else. I think maybe the forest have been planted and it's going the paper from that forest will be used to the books in a hundred years it'.s So a nice way of having a forest. Again, I'm going off memory . twenty one fourteen felt a long way away in twenty fifteen. Now I'm thinking Yeah, algorithm. Well, he's only ninety to a hundred years . You know you have aged ten years since then. thirty nine years away. What am I now? thirty eight? Yeah, I'll get there. All right, yeah. The Jane Calmont of the podcasting world . Okay, here is a fact now under the custodianship of Zan Z AN Zan, your fact is that Japan is considering installing toilets in its lifts a long drop. What's it What an unusual fact . Yeah, that 's not a country it's not the whole country . I think maybe they were having a problem with earthquakes hitting and people getting stuck in a lift for a long time. And so it's better, it's obviously better if there's a loo in the lift. It's best of all if you don't need to use it . You know, the best lift loo is one you never have to use. That's true. Do you think you know when you're in the lift with a bunch of other people and someone farts and everyone's like, who farted ? Like someone's having a shit. I think that's harder to hide Where does it go? Does it go into a storage box? Do they have incredibly complicated plumbing, do we remember that, sort of stretches and I don't I think it must be look, this is an emergency thing . This is not designed to be plumbed into the building's thing. There'll be a small poo box. Had you just been to Japan when we did this fight do you think? I think I must have been. Yeah . I think you would use it because they'd be a novelty. That's the danger is that everyone who've gotten a lift would immediately want to use the toilet. There's got to be a system where the toilet only pops out of the wall if the lift gets stuck. Yeah, a good point. Because then otherwise you're right, you're asking for trouble. Yeah, yeah. I don't think I don't know if they ever ended up doing this considering it's very weaselword put into a headline factor. I'm sorry about that. Yeah. . I think I blanked it out because I have a phobia of lifts and the only thing that sounds worse than a stuck lift is a stuck lift where now people are just shooting in a box in the corner . I still put my when I'm going around with my what is this going to be? This is not there's no pur involved, but I always when I need to get a lift leg at station sometimes I'll have a pram because I have a baby in it . And the baby needs to go in the pram because I don't want to get them out. So I put the baby in the pram and I usually ask a nice looking person. I think I've said this for a nice looking person to go up on a lift with the baby and then I'll meet them at the top of the stairs . I have to do it whenever I go get home because of my station I need to get over to the other side. So can I just say the thing you're worried about with the lift is that it might break down? But if it breaks down with your baby and you're on the outside, that's fine. No, it makes me sound like a selfish mother, but I think my argument would be that logically I know it won't break down. It's just a phobia and I don't have phobia on behalf of my child's. I think it's nice that you trust strangers so much. Exactly. Yeah, great . Because you're also scared of flying . Would you put your child on an aeroplane and then just maybe get a boat across the Atlantic race. I say I'll be there in fifty two weeks . Could you look after the kindle then? The thing about List is they can't go anywhere except to the one place they're going unless someone presses another floor button, but you hope that won't happen. Yeah. Do you occasionally look at the person who's in the lift with your baby and think , I'll wait for the next one ? I do, yeah, I usually make sure it's when there is a car having a sh it yeah this fact goes out to Keith Berry and it's that Spotify's random function is not random . I love this one. Yeah Spotify had a thing where they would play random stuff, but it formed what people thought were patterns . It might play you because if it's a properly random system, it might play you three songs by the same singer in a row . And that makes people complain to Spotify saying, Hey, I thought this was random. And what Spotify should have done is stuck to their guns and said, It is random. Sometimes randomness will throw up three songs by the same singer in a row. That's randomness. And instead, they caved and they made it so that it's structured but it feels more random to us. I honestly I think I'm on Spotify side . You okay? Because I think if you press random on a playlist, what you want is different things all the time. Yeah . So actually I think they've done something good there by maybe there should be two buttons, one which is true random and one which is fake random. Yeah, I think there should be mathematically random and I think that should be Spotify random Yeah And which do you think we'd get the most presses? I'll probably spot a high random Dweebes who don't want to want true randomness. I can't remember the purpose of random anyway. Why would you ever press random for a song? Well, you have a big long playlist and you don't want to get the same order all the time or the playlist is like six hours long and you don't want to just listen to the first ten songs again. Of course that makes a lot of sense. I should start doing that actually. I'm getting very able to build me a button up . Okay, final one for the day. That's me. And final one for the day and this is for Rachel Johnson. Rachel Johnson take very good care of this fact because it's that scientists have grown an ear using Van Gogh's DNA Real slap in the face. Do you think that's Rachel Johnson, the sister of former Prime Minister Boris Johnson? Who else would have been? It's Muslim . Yeah. An unusual name. Very unusual pair of names Interesting. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Quite funny. But it won't be an actual working ear, will it? It'll be one of those like the shape of an ear and skin. Will it be? Yes, it's just the outside of the ear. And I think they were growing on some kind of tissue scaffold. I don't think it was one of those weird ears on a mouse. No. I think it's always a bit odd. I'm going to come out and say, I think it's weird growing ears on the back of a mouse. Controversy . Van Golf's DNA, but yeah, it's not really Van Gosh here. What were they doing here? What are they doing here? I think they're just a little bit of a joke, isn't it? It's Van Goth. It's like in your face, Van Gogh, you didn't have an ear in your life, but hundred years later. I think basically you're starting up this new science where you can build ears on scaffolds and you want people to get a bit interested in it. And so to do that, you think who do I know who would have wanted an ear? Yes in history