Future Plans and Final Thoughts

I've had a traumat of six months. I save chicken and beef got in the rail world. Trauma, I'll show you trauma You were the one who convinced me to go on L loveve Island and I was like, I don't know. I'm not sure about it. You Olivia. G your stupid skinny ass on this. someomeone's got to make a for us. Have you signed an NDA? Starar you should put me on, me back from the day. C see me out. I'm gonna tell this story. I've never told it before. Okay, let's talk to my listeners about the yacht pictures with Pete. Tell the whole story. I could have made a massive mistake here This has been posly the last episode of Olivia's house News Sundays did not and exclusively on AMC and AMC pllus. I am the vampireless do. I'm a rock star now an Rice's Imortal Universe comes what Vulture calls the most momentous event in fictional rock history. Thousands of fans. I want millions Smer This is the Fampireless Dot. all new Sundays at nine exclusively on AMC and AMC plus, stream now Queen Carvania stood haloed by the morning sun. An army hung on her every word. My champions, I have sold my chariot on Carvana. 'twas a lovely SUV, an inexplicably queenly offer. They're even coming to the castle to collect it Polite, We feast An offer you can feast on. Sell your car today on Carmana Pick upail. This part of the podcast is brought to you by Tom Boolla, who have teamed up with the charity breast Cancer Now. Dolls, we talk a lot about checking our breasts, but if I'm being honest, it's one of those things that's really easy to forget. Checking your breasts can literally be something you do in those everyday moments, like getting ready for a night out, putting on lotion after a shower, watching TV, or listening to a voice note that's just way too long just normal life. The more we make it a habit, the easier it is to find time to actually do it. Dolls, as you know, Olivia's house is always open for intimate, nothing off the table, conversations. Honestly, you could even check right now while you're listening to this. I dare you That is what I really love about what Tombola and the charity breast Ccer now are doing. The Tombola community is built around chatting, checking in, and supporting each other every day, and they're encouraging people to bring that same energy to breast chehecking too. Sometimes all it takes is a quick nudge from a friend sending this episode into the group chat or someone simply asking you checked recently. Those little reminders are often the thing that actually prompts us to do it, especially when over half of Tombola players have been affected by breast cancer in some way, either personally or through someone they love. And if there's one thing to take away from this, is that checking of breasts should feel regular. So heads to the Tom Bola and breast Cancer now hub It's filled with a handy infographic on what to look out for and a whole lotad of information and content, then send it to a friend or your group chat as a little remind to check it on each other too. becausecause the more we talk about it and encourage each other, the more it becomes a habit we can actually stick to Hi dolls, Wlcome back to Olivia's house God, I could have I could have made a massive mistake here, but let's see how this goes By popular demand I have in my house today He's always in my other house, so I thought I'd bring him to this house It's my best friend. M He Get the fridge up and live. That's all I' say well come to your house. What's in the fridge? None of business What's normally in my fridge? Water, sparkle water, Dyaco. No more Zemper. That wasn't yours. What else in there I but A Gourmet chicken where we went to organic chicken organic, not gourmet and organic. Yeah, and some che strings, bab bells. Yeah. And then the freez then big mass of bones for the dogs like ostrichge and cks or something like that. They they're Causchans. Oh Causchions. Mark, welcome to my house. these sofas are so lovely. Gorgeous. What do you think of this I love that. It's like A nice chic little bar where you can have like a bedy or your mid Butotlate It's gone on in the week Can we spay on this? Yeah. Babe, I would never show. wouldould I? Youupid. G, you'll end up getting cancellled after this one. Well I have told everyone that this is at their own risk. Shake him like a leaf. Okay, Mark You're hairy on my house. may live to regret it, you may get me cancellled, so many things could happen You know to sh. I hope. I course What would you like to leave at the door? Boy friends Honey, what ex husband? And may they rot in herll laap? He their houses. Etsy Case, anyone watching wants do Etsy Case, Linkoln bio How long have you got becausecause we've got a few es between us I dated some rotters, didn't I? And you? Well life Well wellies, why was we allowing people to do this to us? I don't know what it is with me. I get attracted to life what I think it is, this is what tos called, Jeor D's intelligent. Like, there's like that abandonment thing what's called. Like the someone's got like a attachment ofidoid Because I didn't be like chasing. I chased them in Im life Look at meself something, you better fuck and grow the fuck up and know who the fuck you are. I attract these psychopaths. I know. And I've had a right mix. I've had narcisss, I've had cheats, I've had I have one that used to steal my makeup What? Do used to steal my makeup and then gased like me that I was going mad and not to steal it so I couldn' use it, to steal it so he could put it on his own face. Going h to the Surrey Hills, put lipstick look on himself in the mirror Well, whatever floute your bo. You landed in New York this morning. Oh, yeah, Cosmopolitan. For those that you don't know, Mark is a flight attendant and he is one of the best. He's a jet setter. We're first class flight attendant, girls and boys. But our listeners may know you from somewhere else. Not cry much. D't put the scouse's voice and my face on cry much You should be on Cry watchatch But, you know You might know the show Dperate Sousewives if you are a TV connoisseur. I was Mark was on TV before me. Yeah I was on the HJ. Mark was on before me. and he was on desperate Sousewives with his ex husband. you had a little shop G his house. Get an Etsty case right now Okay let's see win I think it's they've stop paying yours and paid mine because my love life's off the wall must be an Etsy witch. I'm tormented I'm like Jesus of Nazareth. executed off the face the air no one knows. But back's the story we got into. He was on Tle. Yeah. You you were the one convinced me to go on Lve Iland.. Do you remember I was like came out to Dubai to see you and I was like, I don't know. I'm not sure about it. You're like, Olivia Get your. You're like, I'm not on the tellley anymore. One of us has to be on the telly. You're gott pay my bills. My husband's too t my money But I remember we were in what was the place where you spongee jumped do? Oh my God, no that it would drift. It used to be the club. drift drift. It wasn't drift you skydive over there. Club zero gravityub Just zero gravity no job. Oh God. How old we? seventy six? That was lame, wasn't it? It was zero gravity. ero grav life, I'm gonna to do. G're fucking stupid skinny ass on this. Someone's gonna make a forders. And I was on the phone. God, this is like Sonasalgia. I was on the phone to Brad and I was going I love this guy and you're going, he'll still be there when you get out And he was. And look you now. neverever look back. Oh now now L look where he is in the band the Wedd B. I'mato Kin's never seeia. But I also remember Who gave me a? Who gave me a did? Aition cus. I remember going to the Armani lounge. Do you remember that day in the Armani lounge? Is that when that guy fell off the back of that chair? Y. A guy was wasted and he fell off the back of his chair. I actually knew it was so embarrassed. I was left to live. I'm so sorry he's with me. Do you remember my old nose Jesus is ten nightss like We are gonna attach some pictures guys for the edit I mean, if like they wouldn't find us now if those are the photos they use. We have completely different faces. Truly we could have rob banks back then im. You was like an anntita. An anntitte, I was like, Fy, you're gonna to follow for twist. You were like Nancy It was just I look rough as ourselves. How was I model with that face? Do you know what though I remember first seeing you in Vegas and I used to be obsessed with Britney Spears. And I remember you had this bleach blondeer these tits like rocks underneath your chin and I was like Miss Sury, you had Miss Sury on the sh. No London was. You were Sory and you'd done two You done London and Sy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I was like, oh my God, Miss Sury is the model Brity Spee. I've got to be a mate. Okay, we'll give the guys the context now. We I see pageants loved a pageant, loved getting your mess somewhere, loved strutting it about, loved any excuse not to do something proper. Just loved manipulating men for money. loved her money. loved attention. You should never. And you and your ex husband were E Pg were the head of hair makeup for a particular pageant. Well, let's face it my makeup, you walked out like Rupaul after that done it. You walked in at ten, walked out at two. You've never met someone who gave less of a shit about their job. suppuose a job than you. I just turned off at the son Tanon. Literally these girs would be like turning up to the hotels so we'd be like, I've got ten AM makeup. He'd be in the gym lifting weights down the roue in Starbucks outside by the pool frying himself. Do you know my mate, Olivia? do you want to give him money later to gamble? Because Olivia has never been tight. So when she's got all the chips, she go,, I'll put them in yours and I'd be like, Are you sure? Spread the wef? Spread the weelf? What a socialist I am. We met in Vegas and we basically on the pageant, we've been separate ever since. We've been friends for So I was twenty one, thirty four now How long was that? Thirteen years. Catle alderman suck on that. Apparently, if your friendship lasts over ten years, it will last a lifetime. I mean we have had some fragile moments. Mark, if we weren't friends now, I'd have to kill you. I know, ' I know too much. I'd have have. I would have to kill you The sun would make a fall tun off. Have few signs N y Scarle you should put me on put me back on was like in me head, You better fucking st. Scarle my agent. C. Well, well after we had a snake in the camp C too. You won't You won't and you just didn't listen I can guide you, but if you're not going to follow, youll fall off the cliff. You're soft Oh so stupid. I know. L, you know. So your first impressions of me was you thought I was Brittneay. I was obsessed And I thought she's going be so pretentious and facetious because I remember used to walk in and all the men ago. And if I wouldd just be out to look and I'd think, I don't do like that but me for a bitch little slack. I remember my was like, Ohh my gosh,'re really cool. She's like yeah, you too I we got of a big a big king God of five guys or something that it was? Yeah, you probably had sushi You know, from a from. To be fair. in the background I have was counselor McDonald's and you' and sushi. I did used to eat a lot of junk back then. I could eat what I wanted. I eat I had of six pack. You were like to Gor cell bonies. kept on going. Oh no. and I used to work out, o god, like every day, even I was hungover. If I'm hung overver now I need nine ninety nine. Like I see the light. I think I'm going to pass into the next li. I mean when I stay in yours through the weeefing you were just on the surface there This first time I've seen stop. Thats will be like a genie in the lump, You alive. I didn't wake up I was checking your pockets for the fifty Check on the bags, which one's the more expensive one. I woke up from my nap and he was in a safe. No could these his fake. I to be watching a Dvo P down where the phone goes off end. Can you turn that off? I've got anxietyy volume two This phone rang and I leited you my head hit the ceiling. I'm a nervous rack at the minute though. What is wrong with you?? I've had a traumatic six months. I saved chicken and beast got in the rail world. Trauma, I'll show you trauma I've been in the Stockholm syyndrome for the last year. I don't know whether I'm coming again, I don't know whether I' shit or vomit my life's in turmoil. He'sute I'm gonna to love to sit. R I'm gonna to sit that I have to get us another beer Yeah. Gys, I knew this is gonna to happen. She says to my producer, get us another beer. You, you've tried that in two goldals. This is Weedathererspoon's love. This is Olivia's house. I'm Are you seeing the George Michael in the mid down this Mike? Right, let's try and get through some of these boys seate him. Wn the two made to name, but God, how can could we even do this? Our funniest memory together funniest memory was probably I would say about you teaching us not to fuck the help Cust' not a Oh well, my publicers is gonna have a fit. Oh a Very famous guy in America. I'm gonna tell this story, fuck it, I to I'm scared of what we' say. So if anyone has watched Sex in the City with the episode that Vince Vaughn is in and Carrie Bradshaw? I got Vince Vaugh. So if you've watched it you have, if you haven't haven it, we met a very, very famous guy at his mansion in the MGM mansions in Vegas I met what I thought was one of his friends who was also a big player. But hold on, miss Caveat this, I actually don't care. You guys made a big deal out of it. Anyway, slept with the guy. It turns out what he told me about himself was a lie. He was in fact the guy's assistant, you know, didn't have a pot to piss. He was wearing his watches and his clothes, I was like live He's rich. She's like I don't care he's hot. And I was like, he's got an AP watch on. I was like, an AP watch'? an AP? She' like Oh,arkel won't understand. Anyway, she goes miss and comes back and then It Ts out be to figa But I don't actually care. Everyone else made a big. The group we were rolling with that time were very like it was like who you know? like who you've been with? everyone was so like shallow and money obsessed. It was surprisable, I've never been like that. I just thought he was hot. I didn't care. Okay, so you've just described everything that you was at that time money obsess wasas he hung like a and was like, I don't know. I've been drinking for five days Right One of our foiest memories together. I just thought off the top of my head, maybe last year and I'd beat when we all naked showered together. That was the best. Do you know when they say when you die, you go to the best place. The holiday will be when I die. Not even like getting married that I be for last year. It was sensational. wasas the best holiday of my life. It was their best And we've been on so many holidays. There was just the group of us Like there wasn't one person that was a problem or a dick, or like you there wasn't one disagreement. We just had the best time. And like you'd look out and itd look like it was a move. Youd like tod be like that su somemer haze on this yacht. We laughed. We laughed. We got naked showered together, we got dressed together We got ready to get It was so we shared beds together. I broke the beds. if you remember, this was. I threw himself onto the bed at Occa and broke the bloody sprindles. It was built like a bison. I was on the steroids, be fucking neck was the size of the house, snpped the bed in two. You you know what, Mark? let's actually talk, Okay, let's talk to my listeners about the yacht pictures, with Pete Because this is there's a funny story here. Just as a subtext, okay, I was obviously leaning back on him like on the, but nothing happened. You tell that whole story. But the pictures, the actual h came about was funny, right? So I'm like leamp back on him and whatever. Our friend Meghan But let's go first when that woman Donkja Do remember Rebecca is the name. She dunked. Do remember she slipped drunk and dunked Do you remember now? No. She remember. What the hell you were getting out of the boards? You know, like that board where you jump? Do you not remember? Where was she? Did did she give me concussion? 'causeuse I don'tember she she bo dr. Dunk me. Like push me in. Is she even in this W wr? Olivia Was you even there? So when you were getting out of the water and you know that like balldy being. You getting out and she was rotten and fell down the stairs, slid and dumped just so she water ball and you were upset Do you remember this? No, is that why? I't long I don' doctor any Is that why he was cuddling me? Yeah, so when you you were crying and I I remember hitting my head, but I thought I hit it inside. Yeah It was when you got dumked under the water and you were crying and I don't see you cry at all. So I thought it was funny. Now you're saying, I remember hitting my head, but I don't remember how it happened. I had a concussion. youn't let me drink? Wellcause it is' in a brain I can'tcuss anyw E Okay, so then basically we're on the boat and our friend Meghgan, Meganan Elliot, who we love We adore her. She's my second sister. She's my blood, my family. But lovever, sometimes she a couple of sandwiches short at the whole picnic. sometometimes she comes out of things and we go, o, shut up, Meghgan So eight, she goes, We're in the middle of the ocean, right And not posted anything for days, there's a catamaran. So like if you don't know C catamaran, it's one of those boats that like has like two bits and then the middle bit is like It's a weird bo It's a random askk boat And she goes, it wass quite far away. She goes, someone was taking pictures of us off that boat I saw a flash and it was massive. and we go, shut up, Megha, We're taking the picture likeut off' taking pictures of us. Who do you think you are from Jennifer Aniston? Like we were actually mocking her for it. And then she was like, No I swear, E carried on about our business. next day we're at the pool. I'm so hung over. againain, I think I'm gonna die.' the I'm on the bed And she comes in and she goes told you. Tld you, didn't I have on M you. And then she was getting all like, I told you, told you any she's shut up Megan Shut up, Megan. She's scrolling through. And she's go, I knew I knew I sort Sh the tits out. So let's put this into contextual form. She's like this I've got bigger tits. I'm getting gang I masy done in a couple of weeks. I've got bigger tits than Meghgan And we were laughing because the Daily Mail put it up and literally, this is no exaggeration for the effect of the story Why they even wasted the ink trying to cover your nipple? It was like The prince had like splashed a little bbink over the nipple. They put a square over her nipple that I'm not joking was half a millimeter by half. It was so offensive because they really wanted the readers to understand she was topless. She hasn't had a boob job. Mark told us she needed one. I told her she did not. She's got boobs like a soofper mod. She needs them Okay. so that that was that was funny. We have a lot. We have we hang out, we have chill time, we have real time. back to the picture repee That was it. Yeah, and then everyone kept on coming over to me you were going What's going on? I was like What's it like with I know what you're gonna say. What's it like with people knowing that I knew you Yeah. It' are cut andum life. I am a being as well. I have a heart and soul Oh my god, what's to live your life? Is she really niceight? She's a She can rot her now And she can get a job and she can ram it up at her. Okay, Mark, what's the drunkest you've ever seen me? Oh my Godd, the drunkest was when we went to Sunny foredera in Pasha. N even Mackanage her. like I don't suffer from anxiety, but that night I've seen you in the way states of my whole life. that night in Pasa like I thought. She's not gonna come back from this. You was destroyed and you had these like red romper knickers on And everyone's going Livia,livia and Sunny for todayay. I wasn't even getting that No one was even interested. You just want to pictures for you. And I was like, no pictures, no pictures. I was loving the limelight. And I remember thinking I was gonna grab my fucking arm and stand up your stupid bastards. And I had to lean it up. And then I didn't think they were gonna let us injure remember. Yeah, ' they made me wear these massive sunglasses that were like this biger they were you like gol cher but you were like posh piceed? I didn't see anything. It was like I was going skiing. I was like And then we got in and I thought she's not coming out of this. But do you know what? One thing that I always say to everyone, you always take the time I go, C can you pitch, a pchure? I'm like now you're like, come, get a pictchure. C my hands, I don't wanna ever like reject one of my hands in the wild. I love that. I was I was like, wipe the slob off your mouth, Y stupid dirty cow U I'm like she's not with me. I'm just the security guard Why do you do it toimy? I've got a street crats. I know.ike what what do you think they the gay? Now Lve J you remember we come on to Streing feellows the other week and there was themam fellllowas like trying to sush you about J ona J rem M Ban? Youu and I acted dead straight. I said I got amnesia? I don't remember anything. Today on Mark's house, we're going to be interviewing Olivia, who was once a former O Olivia And to rem Bent, he was like talking and I was like, getet your back. And you were like, Why am it gonna dr up? getet your watch Ionom me norm me thisish is my bed. Do you remember now? Yes Dish is my baed, I'm gonna put it in the tax you right. He said, No, no, no, I want the picture of to be Back off mate, I'll snap your jaord. if you carry on Walked away I was like that, I'm olivia, quick call youber. We're gonna get mared. So Mark does like code switching when he's drunk to protect us. He does like he goes mask straight. Mask Rough Saler. And because you're a big guy. peopleople fucking back the fuck off And I can fight Can. I've seen it hands like shhovels. Who gets more attention than the gay bar, Mil you? You Yeah I said to you last time because we was good to this called Freedom and it's S out freedom. It's share out free bottle. like when she goes We goes in a couple of weeks ago and there's like this like cabaret thing and Olivia walks in and the obsessor and she goes, I want to sit on this table. It's really fun So the schools comes over and goes to the whole table they're like the talent singing.id you remember? they were all the people sing and he's like, No, no, will everyones sitting you like I I don' want to impose. We sits there, you get on the pole.side down. She's insides out. Okay, so talking of parties and celebrations. Yeah. whichich one of my parties or events has been your favourite? I' love to say the if that was amazing. Remember of Manchester Yeah. That was amazing. The dress code was whack, but it was amazing, but then this party I proper loved because this year was the best, I think. It was the right crowds in they It was an amazing like set. Eone was looked after. It was like a proper bus vibe, the DJ was amazing, the hotel was amazing. We did it at Broadbk and so how it was smaller than I normally do. It wass like threety forty people, maybe. Oh heaven forbid, I'll be lucky in me forty. I've got ten. So your f if is coming up do big forow. And we're I'm not to fall surprise, but we are probably going do we're going to do a few things, but we are going to go back to Tabitha And we are going to have a day that's dedicated to the birthday. Can I please have the pink Her that you had? Do you remember when you had the pink Hommer? My handnder? Yeah. I thought you went a real one. they held me above a o pink Her. I was f frightened for my life Mark I gonna lift you the fuck are you trying to say? I'm very delicate. I'm just big. They have me on my Hndu in this hammer above the crowd. They're going eight, eight, eight and I'm in the thing. But it went on for too long. She looked like it went on. I'm not joking, it went on for seven eight minutes. The crowd started to lose. everyone started to lose interest. My own friends and family had just gone back to their drinks and their food and I was still getting He still' getting constered around the pool on the t lap like the f. I' going, I can get out now it's fine. They go Sorry hi, hi, I could get That's the most I've ever seen you been b thisas in your life? Becauseuse I was like I I was getting like whip bladder eight eight. It's like Barbie I take your job biceps after they' working out. Oh my gos, like get me out of there. Oh she's coming aroundound like Okay, people will know if we've ever had an argument Sammy Like a Google just the the day. How weird is this? A Google saying Who is Mark Johnson Wh toel you that wasn't said Someone Google it has something like a friends for many years, but I've had copious amongster spats I was like, I've had one. I that we've not fell out. Nobe we haven't fell out. We've never fell out. I'll be the wedding dress story Well, there's God I I've got a lot I've got a few gay friends in my life and one thing you all have in common is you're all evil And what happens is when a story gets leaked about me, they all startop winding each other up going, Live thinks it's you, Live thinks it's you. So someone had leaked, what was there? My wedding dress.. And someone told Mark that I thought it was him. I never did. So he had the amp thinking that I thought I never thought it was you. It was in a terrible mood Wh why didn't you ask? I think it was the sterood. I must have been like whole pumped up on the thoughts, I'm gonna end up snapping edge or on a wedding day She should be walking in and getting wallst st out in a wheelchair with a wire stuck to a chair. I need to lay off them, stadoy What My best traits You are loyal to the death. And I always say like about hope my boyfriend. It not so long ago. It'sitial time. And he was like if you ever needs anything, I love you so much. Fuck off You can always ret to tont Well whatever you in, me main ses more so than needer. I'll ask you Allight So he's like that with an Etsty case. But be like Jack and B on my fa you' on a boat The Atty Case in full swing Yeah What was my worst trait Folken Not answering a whatsApp. Oh I'm not going to go into specifics because it's personal information. It's ADHD. Your worst trait is when I really need you to do something in your life Mark I'm on the biggest shooter in my life is this necessarilyive I'm on that stor Mark calls me And he I want a big shoe. I actually could say I was on the Garnier shoe. Seaty palms. say what it is What he called me to tell me was so ridiculous. And bear in mind, as you guys have probably worked out, Mark is a wind up merchant. like I could message Mark and be like, Ohh,'s blah, blah. And he go, o, my God, L do not tell he's been fired. Like he's always winding me up so I never know. So if he rings me around on this photo shoot and he's like, Lve, blah blah bl blah. It's something quite unbelievable I'm not going to say what it is. I a lot of. I'm at a garden issue. I'm not joking, there's a hundred people on this set. likeike a bigg my exact words were biggest shoot of my life I don't have time for this, but phones down. They' going, Lib, I'm being fucking serious. I need your help. You're the only person I attention. She's like, You're lion stop huring me off. I'm A fuckast That's what happenens to the boy that cried off. N c. I didn't believe him until like later that night. And you were like in tears and I was like, wait, is this real? And you were like, Liff, it's real Tew here you'll w an inid sing b. Believe you. Okay, your best trait. You're loyal as well. Loyal to the death. That's why we've been friends so long. and You can just light up a space like you're the only person that can get me out of a bad mood. Oh God. Genuinely. I'll agree to disagree last week. you were in a terrible mood I was like, I was scared Sasha would I like could dr now I felt like I was watching the Dvil Wars Prouds had new sound. I can of lip read now. It's a new skill of ac quiet And your worst trait is boy who clsw. M dating life. Me dating life is horrendous. likeike watching a car crash. Can't even let me like get my attention for my divorce without trying to have a million traumas. I was divorce face I was on TV fish, you get on TV. I was divorced fish, you got divorced I get a new boyfriend but you're still to find month. I'm doing a good job though. Well Aga Whatdating advice would you give me? I'd say Stop being so masculine and being independent because you always want like, No, I'll get this. You need to let people like look after you. Stop being so manly. Yeah, you big man it I'll pay the bill meates. Let the man do the way, you needs to give them a bit of testosterone in the balty. And then I'd say Do talk about yourself We all know what you're about. You've got to like b you've got to swallow that pride just believe. Tell me about you when he startsing he's a banker start player We all know about I don't talk about myself do I but we all know about Yeah. So you can't talk about yourself because like Yeahah, I already know about you I'm Mr Manning. I'maddonkinner, I'mv Yov. I'm Coria Moo. want to train like a Red Bowl athlete. Tell us your fitness goals this summer to enter the Red Bowull Athlete challenge. You'll get to try each of our workouts for a chance to win an ultimate Red Bowull experience. D you have what it takes This episode is brought to you by Nordstrom. Whether you're packing for a vacation or dressing for a wedding, Nordstrom has head to toe looks for wherever summer takes you. From swimwear in bold color to romantic florals and dresses that make an entrance. find the right style for every unforgettable moment. Shop new arrivals from brands you love like Farm Rio, Free People, Vince, Wait, and Sods. Plus free shipping in returns and styling help whenever you need it make it all so easy. Shop now in stores at nordstrom dot com or download the Nordstrom app Right we're going to play a game. We're gonna play No dilds, please for God's sake, I' had sex in five weeks We're gonna to play who's more likely to, right I'll read the statement and then we'll Well, we'll point each other, but we'll also say the name because if someone's listening to this' not watching, right? You ready Who's more likely to shag the sheets That the sheet? Yeah. Oh, Olivia, I'll tell you not fair to feel ashamed of me. What doess it mean? It means like when you What's it mean? I'll tell you when you're eighteen. Okay Who's more likely to have a one night stand Three, two, one. You're gonna get me mes from the Stockin syyndrome This is Bible truth, right? I'm going on record. Can we all just say a moment of peace to my publicis? ' there's no way for this episode to go out without it causing murders? And I actually don't care anymore I have had To one nightstands in my life Do you know why? Because I've tried to have many more They don't leave Well I've had every boyfriend I've ever had was meant to be a one understand Every boyfriend but you kept them there. They just didn't leave refuse the late. To blame them and you paying the bills, being being all masculine I've got this data. That's on me But you know what it is? You're giving the good pay Oncees he tasteed, you don't wantanna go? never had a complaint. Well, I never did Lying in the bed like that in the next room. What's it like being in the next door room? I'm like shag on the sheets. Now you know what it means? Who's more likely to send a risky text? A me Mark, M. I say I type things and then like it comes back I sort of whole cheese lightight. I'm like, Why the fuck did I even say? He was having a text, you know discussion with someone the other week and he was texting so furiously. The vein his neck was literally I looked to his table. I said, Mark, are youre gonna give yourself a stroke? No, you didn't. So I'm like texting. she goes, Mark Washington. You're gonna give yourself a stroke. I me my anxiety through the roof. Can we just take it down a notch I was shaking like a lef,'t it Who's more likely to snog a stranger? You Yeah to be fair. I'm Ripson, every woman I've a man woman, cat dog, owl goat, horse, pig. I am everyveryone's getting a snuog. Twoo standampbooers' youre anyone's. The matter times have tried snog you and he's to f plant me onto the floor is I've just I love kissing people. Also just what's a kiss when when we're all friends? Well, you know, I mean, we've had nica travels together And got pictures? I' like? Yes, and it's not for y. The picture of us s nakaking the shower, he's on top of me. I can't have surviveed. Fay of mes at the time, she was like five still went through. I was about eight What am I now? Like five and a half way through You go in the chym, it's a muscle mass, you got bum and I'm like rushhingness. you's like Tomata Redll. Wh's more likely to have a secret kink Meg Because I'm quite I've got a kink. What is it been takaking the piss out of In bad me by manen in life. Oh yeah, literally take you through rides, Take on the Para. Except the gays The gays can't get a lookck in But yeah Yeah, you oh my god, what is yours, Mark? I can't tell yeah, I feel ashamed the national know. Why is it freaking? Yeah. They know how bad. L Oh no a can I feel ashame Oh no is it sudd get you in trouble Yeah? What Oh It's pinky. It's PG thirteen. I don't need to know this about my friends. Who's more likely to to talk themselves out of a parking ticket? Y You. That's what fake titties are for. Although tell me I to say that, notothing works on them. I've never known I've once maybe in my life, I've caught him and I've manag to stop him halfway. away with three p tage you remember when we went? It was like, that was luck Hees We went to a garden centerah, believe it or not I don't think we can answer this. I'll say Who's more likely to date two people at once? Today on Olivia's house G, sorry, guys, there' a connection problem there. The answer's both We'll just take one for the team Who's more likely to send a sexy picture Meg Do you remember Christmas? You're runing like a photo studio in that? You actually said that didn't he I could do with one of these lights in my house because this really shows my skin turn out. I'm terrible for them. But you know what? like I'm not as flatful like slaggy with it, but I'll actually look at myself and go Darn I'm hung with a horse. I love that For privacy, I've felt it against my sideigh. For the men and women listening, what is the key to a good nude selfie? For the man, you've gotta turn your hips slightly out so your shoulders look dead broad. You've gott to like pull your balls down so because we lovey I love a sacky ball. I give him a bit of a tug soestang Do youve saacky balls sexy? I can't say that I do. Oh. I wouldn't want them to be like, well, not like about your ankles like but I Yeahah, I guess maybe yeah, I wouldn't want them to be like so tight like, you know talking like a D minor high pitched tone now. I love like a saggy ball and like when you're hung like a horse, it just really accentuates your body kind of look like a big and b. What sort of lighting? It doesn't matter if you' not looking at the light now yeah. Oh so lighting is did you do it selfie in the mirror? How'd you do it? Yeah, I wouldn't take life one like that at yourself. You'd probably love p. Because a lot of the pose' crying, they love the light above Like that, like my face I seent me that, I'd smash the face cleaner. I'd be like, what the fuck is that? By the way, don't use grinder for the records I'm far too classy. I'm a friend of a celebrity Who's more likely tos go to skinny dipping? Both of us. We love getting naked. We f can strip each other off and be jumping in hands and hand like familym and Louis. Ball fack in your hands, nipple and mife hand in hand someersalult in H. Who's more likely to get arrested? Both of us. I actually have nearly been arrested before Who's more likely to have a secret admirer? Well, obviously, it's going to be you I mean, we went to Mo and spent through the weekend Do you remember that woman in the aisle Do you remember? They should tou the I seen Have I got like something wrong with me? Listen I'm going to do I'm going to take the power of attorney, give me a bank account, your car, your flat and I'll look after you It's going into aervative shhip, whatever it's called. I'm hanging my wings up and I'm going to look after your twenty for seven. If you pish yourself, I'll change your appyK I Mark, I can't remember a thing. Petrifying? When was it we at MMS? What were we doing in there When we went the other day, you had me carrying all the bags like an old donkey. Wait chs. Oh Heaven forbid it was Charlie. You bought that in Organic goose and I look. It's like an emk. It was like Horright Be if you're putting that near your mouth You need sticky that in the bin This is the weirdest thing guys, okay? And the other morning I didn't gracey said what I didn't film this social media Why did I do it every more, every day? No, what' say? Once a week I cook a live my. I cook a full size roast chicken in the oven, okay And this will change your life if you're not vegetarian And I cook it in the oven and then I cut it all off and I put it on a plate with clean film. And then me and the girls, me and my dogs load and stitch, we eat the chicken over the coming days. So' I always have fresh chicken in the oven. so it's like, if I'm hungry rather than going eating some crap, I'll eat some chicken, a bit of salt on it, a bit of mayo, or I'll put it in a salad. but I've always got some protein and the girls, they love a bit of organic chicken and with their biscuits, everybody wins The other morning, I'd had the chicken from Whole Foods. The chicken cost like a fucking thirty five quid and I hadn't cooked it and it was gonna be the day it goes out of date. So I got up in the morning, it was five AM and I put the chicken in the oven, took the dogs for a walk because it was like the heat wave so I had to get them out of five. And I came back and there's a chicken boast in the oven and I was like, I'm freak It's half five in the morning I'm roasting a chicken. Let me just put this into context. The chicken that you bought the other day. lookooked like I'd been on a Zempper for five years. I thought you're just literally buying bone and skin.. M have you just paid attention that chicken? It's because it's organic. I couldn't give a fuck whether it was come from mars. It looked unhealthy. But why do you think the organic ones are so much skinnier than the big the numorm ones because they're full of chemicals. Just put a GMO in your body, you'd be fine. You put waste in there, full of botoxin, collagen and fyllers. That That chicken looked unhealthy. It was organic. And it was free range So they get skinning because they run around. they had a good life. So that's what we that's what I do anyway That's a good hack if you' noted vegetarian.en day is ack chicken. I loveer. I mean even in the Wait b that? Witse Witose. likeike people just look and I love the attention. I'm like I pick up she to look at me and then realize she's got a head like a base couch and a big scruffy bone Like a big jumper on, She looks homeless. I'm dressed to kill, like I'm the celebrity. and people are looking around and, Look, she's. She's like, she's not looking at you she's looking at me all right Sit the fuck down I walk around in some states, don't I? Do you remember when we went inter watching? sccreams? Oh my Godd. Guys, so if I'm not working and when people ask for selfies if any of you are listening that have had a selfie with me, I feel ashamed because I think, o they're going to show their pals that. But I'll never say no, but I walk around like a scraft when I'm not working, I really do. She literallyed like she was like home who goes to watch a scream.a hold Mark, tellell the story about going to see sccream. So live goes, I'm gonna to take us all to go going to see sccream sevens because we have these big like comfy beds And the reason I said that is because I wanted a laugh. A laugh. So we' sitting, this woman's getting her head slit off and stabbed in the breast and she's like getting put in a full Nelson on the floor while she's getting her head smashed against the side I made it all g All in shock and she turned on shes What? And I go, osh Shes got head Let's see what happens and she's going Oh, you' about what? Let me watch Will she goes is the spoos onver Wa. The funny bitsnammer F you on about the funny bits. It's sccream seven. peopleeople are getting massacs yeah. And she goes, I thought it was supposed to be funny. and I thought it was like some sadistic cent of human. She thought it was a scary movie. She actually thought we' going to see Scary Mvie. I got it mixed up. So she on went to let's go for nice blastter. we know we had to leave ' she was laughing so much because he couldn't believe that I fought because he said to me, in dinner before I was going, you know what? I just I need to watch a silly film that makes you laugh. And I was wondering why no one was really I think they're thinking L freak. L it's this horror film I thought this was came. I thought it was be funny. So then obviously he's laughing, wheezing so much. mee and him have to walk out. So I fell up the stairs going else made this big commotion evone for that So as we go up, there's this girl who' taking like an episode. She sat down, I don't know if she was like hung overver or she was a really pale bless her. and she was like she looked like she was gonna be sick. She sat with a bag. I don't know. I did check on her. So love goes. L look at really. I said, are okay? I said can I get anything for you? And then she looks at me and she goes Are you offfulull of violins and I was like I sure. He's not but I am.ly sure Oh yeah you can I get a picture? And I'm looking at L thinking you cannot get a picture with this girl. You've got like your hair looks like you've got sixteen animals living in it It was just like a big hibernation nest Like a scrap a makeu pon, a hairband, a big oversizeed hoodie and she's sitting there bold as punch, smiling every veneer hanging on. This girl was so funny because it was like she was passing away, but then when she saw us, it's like she made instant recovery. She She resurrected from the det. I said have I got healing powers? It was am not with me, you haven't I likead liive, touch me, giveive me a r That's one thing I can't bear. Can I cuddle him? As well, I broke up my boyfriends and live gos, Lw, comement sing and get me nails done So goes to see in the snail salon. I can't say for sh, can I? No The woman's about seven, she's sitting. Again, hail like a bird Nest thoughts s from behind. She goes, Mark, she's getting this one nail fixed and I sits there feeling sorry wasasn't that heartbreak and be honest? Yeah I hate seeing it. I' like any of my friends out the worst you've ever seen. Yeah, it was tearful. I of sad and this one tear come down and she looked at me and goes she doesn't know I have to like really give emotion She's like looking at me like I just shit my hands and clapped it and she's going This is that Are you okay? And I'm like, I'm just h live. I don't know what I'm going to do. And she goes We a hands and things shees He'll be al right the same color Are you for fucking real Now I held your hand a minute. Like the pope, youre like snatched away. She touched, she snatched it away, but it was healing. I felt better. And then you tookght me the Ivy for dinner. Okay, you made me carry rocks I the garden center. I need some rocks for the garden centre for my balcony. It' gorgeous. I love when Mark Mark does the heavy lifting for me. It's like having a boyfriend Who's more likely to get married again next Becauseuse if're our thirties we'll be on our second marriages. I'll be here fking four forties at this rate, but we're there Wh do that J Jimsy creeden chair is it may Do you want to know something?. It's to a woman. Her name's Brenda She's got three sovereigns on and she pulls pintts at the local pub. No, I actually think it's tr too because if my love life continues the way it is, I'll be in the fucking convent. Okay, who's more likely to give up their life to religion You. pays well, people get that charity money in You'd be the only n with a bacon in the church Ep in the fif I'd be like I always thought myself a bit of a cult leader. I'd be like what's his name from the topop Gun movies? The scientologist. No Tom Cruise. No you'd be like, I think you'd be like I said, Jessica Parker was the chief nun It's the sexy stylish one. You're not thinking of nuns, you're thinking of Hoccus Pocus, they're witches. Yeah, she's a witch, isn't she Who's more likely to move to another country? You. Do you think? I think you're gonna go to like LA or something next. You reckon. Yeah. Do you know what? I've always said and I'm dead good at me intuition. I feel like you're gonna go to like you know when you go to like the Net Gart or like the red carpet of the Oscars, I think that'll be you next. Really? Yeah. And do you know if you fucking don't take me next year, there's gonna be fucking ructions. You you know you little picture off, I had an invite to the Golden Globes and I couldn't even fucking go In February? Yeah. why? Because the film in the show, they wouldnt not because you I think it's LA. I'd have to fly, that's like twelve hours. doing it and getting back on have lost like three days, minimum three days. It's the Golden globe, stupid power. I was in contract and I could not be on location for filming We did try and they would say you at the shits and just take three days. I'd already done that for some other event es up to McG. Yeah now I'm going to plan better in advance, but yeah, Do you know where this is so random? I don't know career wise, If I still want to be on te you, I don't know how it wouldd work, but I could see myself more than I think LA. has gone really weird and I think it's gone something it's just a bit of a mess and the vibe has changed. I could see myself living in Miami. Oh S you see me living in South Beach? No, you'd be in like Bal Harbor. Oh my Godd. wouldouldn't I? Yacht at the end of your Garden. I'd be having lunches, I'd be a boy. Huan. Okay, let's I't change my name to Huan. Let's Huan Huan. I'll do like your pools and clean it, you just pay me allowance to live in the beach. I love Miami. There's no place in the world like her. I so good. I'm obsessed with her. everyone wants to move even there because it's tax free or something. Well I didn't want to mention but that was half the reason I'm so attred. But I love Miami, absolutely obsessed. Oh my Godd, Okaykay, yeah, manifest that for us Come on, Jesus of Nazareth give a Miami Mark Before I let you go and I let the edit and my PR have the Horrendous job of editing this chap Who should I have next? Who should I have a membership In this house. Yeah, this house. I actually really wanted to get in theico sh in that That's a good one. Obsessed with a and her husband maybe. And the dolls are back. you need to get them on. There's such a vibe. If anyone knows Niki Schherzinger A seeeni you outside theivoy wanting you're so hardot it's unbelievable when I grow up I want to be famous like you. When I grow up, I want to be famous I want to bear movies. Nicole, I can show you a video of me pole dancing that song inedom feel freedom upside down back to funont. H' run ran You' gonna abandon. I'm scared guys. this could be anything. You' gonna band. D you know I'm gonna ban. get right on my areola.. Gs on my tits Shoose and boil Babe each day ain't gonna save your career Give it up She gets on my tits and she's trying to make a comeack and see the Daily Mails day. I scrumble that paper up like it was last week's papers Get it out my eye. Get out my eye What Susie B aanto? Why am I serving chicken and beef and Suzie Be in a bentley What is the whale come to? No more, Susie Bay Stay on your waking tax credits. you've made your money, be happy with the life youre live in, stop trying to make a comeback It's not happening Keep Susy be up all way on Draordin alive S she be not personersonal don't sound much. My tits you can talking about it change the subject Mla pressia's rockten. You next is called dead Rd. What has she done to you? She doesn't really get on. I have a dream. Joan. I have a dream. pooor Susie Bay This has been through the last episode of Olivia's House. More, more, more. So have you liked it Please share it, subscribe, send it to a mate ' I'm gonna be having to live off this one for a long time. This one is gonna skyrock, I feel it's gonna be like anys this has to wrate well or he's gonna end up on a Susan Ball tribute attack. I dreamed a dream of Days g by Everyone, the reason I'm not ugly and boring. My best friend Oh, o, o o I dreamed a dream Das and m It says deellivered, but delivered where exactly? The hallway, the lobby, your neighbor's apartment? Instead of playing detective with your deliveries, get a mailbox at the UPS store. We'll sign for your packages. Text you when they arrive. And keep your deliveries low key. Under locking key, get three months free mailbox services with a new annual agreement at the UPS store For full details and to get your coupon, visit the UPSstore d. com slash offer.