School WhatsApp Groups and Outro

This episode is brought to you by M Ms. Now, Rob, who doesn't love a bit of cookie dough? Oh, it's sensational stuff. Better than actual cookie that comes out of the oven, isn't it? It is. It is. They're ruining the cookies by putting them in the oven. Rob, you are gonna love this though, right? Mm-hmm. MMs have just released a brand new cookie dough flavour. No baking needed. You can just get straight into chewing on the delicious cookie dough flavoured center, coated in of course the smooth milk chocolate covered in the classic crispy MM's shell. Click or tap the banner to learn more and try Eminem's cookie dough available in stores now. This episode is brought to you by Monzo. End of term is nearly here, Jos h. Oh my word. Always a good time for kids to have a bit more freedom outside of their usual routine and even to start giving them some money independence with Monzo's free kids account. You can set regular pocket money schedules and one off payment for something like school holidays. Oh Rob, it's great. Oh and you're not just handing over the reins either. You can set spending limits and get instant notifications when they spend so you can see live when they've blown it all on sweets at the corner shop. Monzo's award winning kids account, download your new favourite bank. For children age six to fifteen, parent or guardian account needed first. UK residents only, T's and C's apply . Hello, you're listening to Parent in Hell with Emily, can you say Rob Beckett? Rob Rob Beckett. Pack it. Can you say Josh Whiticam ? Jos h Whiticum . Whiticum. Well done. That's cute. Are we happy with that? Real cu te. Hi, Rob, Josh and Michael. Hope you're well. This is sent December the second. This year? Last last year. Last year. Not this year. Not from the future. Wait, from all right, calm down, Mike Mother Fly. I've been listening to it. Calvin Klein. I've come back to uh um I've been listening to you from the start but never emailed in until now. Here is I don't think that's a positive. Can I say something about you know that that joke I did about the Calvin Klein in his pants and Mike McFly? Yeah, I get that. Yeah, yeah,, no no,. I wasn't well I didn't want more from you. Oh, sorry. I just sorry, I I I know I just found that joke in that film is so shit, but the delivery's so good it works. When she calls him Calvin. Calvin, how do you know his name's Calvin? It's written in his underwear. Yeah. Imagine being the writing office going, I've got an idea for it. Yeah, yeah. They think his name's Calvin Klein because But you know it's his mum? Yeah. If he'd been wearing my pants she'd have called him son and it would have made sense. Oh, his name's Baggy Sunspell . Hey Baggy Sun. Sorry, guys. Um only sending now is I couldn't find the email address. Also, you wouldn't have your name printed around the the waistband. All I want to talk to you about is what underwear you're wearing for the runner's world photo shoot. But let's give Haley a moment and then we'll we'll really deep dive into that. Is that what we're gonna deep dive into today? Absolutely, and I I I I went to five different shops trying to find a copy to show you today, but it's not out yet. It's not out yet. I just wanna know why you're touching the floor. Carry on with Hayley. Okay. Well we might save it for one of the longer episodes, Rob, because we don't know when this is going out. People are desperate for this content. People one one comment described it as the most uh most anticipated runners world cover of all time. I don't know. I mean, I've got to be honest with you, I didn't know, no offense, Runner's World existed until you told me he was on the cover. No, well, which is fair enough. What does he do on the front? He is arms up like like Rocky at the top of the Really . See, I thought you were gonna be arms crossed in a park or sat on a bench, not crouching, smirking, touching the floor looking sexy. In an outfit you've never run in. T no, too right Are they good? I'm not sponsored. But to the girls and guys at Ali Adidas who who did send me those shoes. Are they good? Do you wear them now? Oh man. They're good. I'd feel like I'm bouncing on air. I honestly, it's like nothing I've ever experienced. What are you wearing before then? Uh I was just wearing normal running shoes, but these are those ones where I'm not sure are they like band or they're they're certainly the No, the Eddie S ones aren't it's the the Nike super venom or super vape. Also, if you it's the first time you've ever watched or listened to this, Josh was on the front page of Runnersworld. Google that first and you'll be on up to speed. But let's give Haley a moment. 16,000 likes on Instagram Runners world, I bet I bet they can't believe their fucking luck. Right, I'd love to see the demographic of people that are actually runners and people that just listen to this and find it hilarious. I'm gonna like that 'cause I'm inspired. No, I'm gonna like that, because Josh Winnakum is sm irking. He's touching the floor, he's kneeling down, he's wearing very short shorts, so there's no sunspells on there. No. You look sexy, and I was disgusted with myself for noticing it. Well you should see me when I'm out pounding the pavements. Getting your PBS seven. Yeah. I assume the lockdown one was wrong until I heard the correct address on the pod the other day. Oh. Amelie used to fall asleep to the pod in the early days. I can only assume she's been listening in the womb, got used to hearing your voices, keep up the good work, love listening. Uh in when I work from home or commute into the office. Thanks, Haley. 499 months Emily , 28 months. Lovely. Oh thanks Haley. Emma Doran today, Rob. Emma Doran, very funny lady. Yeah. She's on tour. Is she based in Ireland? Or based in the UK? We'll find out. Other questions? Other questions that you want to ask her? Um what her PB is? What she wears when she runs. Yeah. Where you're based and what you wear when you run. You got kids yet? Do you know what I'm gonna ask her? Go on. Why my sales are always so sluggish in Dublin. Well, I can help you with that. All that anti Irish stuff you do. Um no, uh Ireland notoriously they don't book a lot in advance. They're very relaxed, almost like a Mediterranean vibe. My audience don't book a lock on the day either. Right That is that yeah, that's different. That's uh that maybe a more personal Do they book a lot after the event? Because that's what I'm thinking must be happening. The late turn up at my gigs is almost it's almost back to the future level. They turn up to see Calvin. Oh there we go. Here's Emma Doran. Happy with that, I am. Yeah I sat on a stool at a restaurant last night and by the end I was fucked. This is a great style for a parenting podcast. What? Was everyone sitting on a stool? No, we booked on the day. Right. And it was like the you know you get the one at the you get the seats at the bar. So you and your family? No, just me and Rose went out for dinner last night. Oh on stools at the bar? On stools at the bar. That's a shame. Well we quite like to watch them cook 'cause we don't have anything to say to each other anymore. Okay. Welcome to Parented Health . That's what I think. Yeah. That's what I say. And if it's dark. By the end my neck was 'cause you you adopt this kind of 'cause sitting at the bar that's where the drunks sit. Where the drunks. Yeah, like traditionally. And but they're able to because they don't feel anything 'cause they're drunk. I d I like a stall if I'm on the booze. Can't sit at a stall to to to eat. No. No. Well the booze kills in pain, doesn't it? Yeah, absolutely. And not just at the back. Generally. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um Hello. Hello. Welcome. Welcome. Official. welcome to the host Thank you for coming. It's very fancy. Well welcome show. We'll chat about you being a parent and y your kids and your tour um as a very funny comedian. But I I I cannot continue without discussing how weak your tea is. I don't know if the camera can even pick that up or can we can we a angle that towards the camera, Mike? Let's take a photo. Let's take a photo. Why don't you take a photo on your phone then put that to the camera? This is tape. Well it's really looking like with the white cup though, isn't it? Why you put your finger in that? Why did you put your finger in your tape? Why did you put your finger on your tape? You did a move there that that's something you would do at home and you forgot that there was other people around. Yeah. So he he doesn't use a teaspoon to make tea. He uses his fingers and moves the bag around in it. Yeah. That's not okay, is it? I don't think you're in the I don't think you can feed questions. Sorry, what do you think of that? If he'd make sure. Look at that. I mean, uh uh look, because mine only goes in for a second. Sometimes I will just whip it out with my finger. But I'm not poking it back in after it's made. Yeah, poking it back in after it's made was wild. It was great to catch that on camera though. Just so that we don't feel like we're making these things up about Josh. Absolutely. Did I wait you've j let's not rewrite history. I think on camera. I think he might have licked it. Well, the viewers will know. They'll all be skipping back now. Or you've wiped it on your calls. I haven't wiped it on anything. So is it just still wet? No, I just did that. It's dried with the natural atmosphere. The Spotify atmosphere. I don't know now. I'll have to watch this and see what you did with the finger. Well this is terrible for you, Josh. This has all started off of how weak you make your tea. It's not terrible for me. I'm trying to drive people towards visualised and I'm doing a very good job . Um Emma ha um also it's on our Instagram at your tea, just so you know. So if you want to see it and you don't want to go visualized, fair enough. Yeah, look, it do I it it does upset people, but that's how I like it. Yes. I just like weak tea. So it's in, it's out, and I tell people it's weak, but they never they can't believe truly how weak it is. No, you wouldn't be able to you say it. No, no. That's why I stepped in. I was like, Is it is it is it lot lots of milk on a tea that's been brewing or is it just in and out? It just it's in and out. It's not overly milk, although I've been told it's a bit milky as well. But and I don't I never make uh unless I have people over, I never make tea in a teapot. I hate teapots. I've d I've never met anyone that ever has. I hate teapots and when you get the they just make the tea go cold and weak. And you can't get your finger in there can you down the spark but ter. Josh is trying to get his little little finger in. Um yeah so that's that's my tea. Oh not even the finger doesn't even bother me, it's you leaving the tea bag in the tea more. That's what I just think. What would you do if you were here? So why do you use a teaspoon to like squish it up? That's what I do for people when I make their tea to make it stronger. No, he just pops his fingers in. Yeah, yeah. But they don't have teaspoons of the bigger. So what would you do if you were at home now? Would you just drink that with the tea bag in and just forget about it or would you leave it on the if you're at home? Yeah. Never leave it on the table. I I don't want brag about my house, but I'd never be this far from a sink. No, but you know what he would do? He'd be drinking his tea and he'd put his fingers back in and squeeze the bag, would you? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but that's not a brag, 'cause a prisoner's really near to a sink all the time. Sorry. Um how many children have you got? Three. Three. And what ages are they? There's big age gap. Twenty-two, ten year gap, twelve, eleven. Whoa. Big gap, little gap. Big gap. Yeah, big gap. Carbon bomb. Big gap, little gap. Yeah. So Wow. And so how was that then? Having a one, a two and a twelve year old? Yes . Yeah, because actually going back then after ten years. Yeah, that's uh and you you know that thing of uh if you've had a baby and then you you go back to have another baby, it's like your labour will be quicker on the second time round or you'll it'll be easier . Not because your body then has totally forgotten after ten years. Oh right, yeah. Right. So you're kind of body wise you're starting from scratch. Right. And then you're like, oh, that's why you went with a second quick one. Another quick one 'cause you're like my body's ready. And I didn't want my mind to kick in. I knew myself if you leave it long enough, it's I f I feel like it's harder to go back the longer you leave it. Yeah. You know, people say Um, you know, our daughter's five and our son is due in April. I'm like what the f I'm like, what the fuck were you thinking? Get it done. Get it done. Get it done. Yeah. But you did have a ten year gap. Yeah. I did have a ten year gap. I mean I don't know the full details, but I was like you you know No. But I was like I was a teenager. Yeah. You know what I mean? So I mean, come on. Now how old were you? I was eighteen. Eighteen, yeah. Yeah. Still in school. Still in school. Wow. Fair play. Wow. In school. Wow. What? Both. Fair play. Okay. I respect it. I definitely wasn't getting anyone pregnant at school. Well, I mean I d I was shocked. I was very shocked. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it wasn't a as as such sort of a planned family at that point? No. It was not and I taught people I actually had heard tell of a girl who was like nineteen who had a baby, was with the boyfriend and she was planning another one. I was like, She needs to be committed. I was like, She's insane. I was like, that's you know I, was giving it all the big way and then sure it was me the following week. Oh my word. Yeah. Not on the cards at all. So so what was your plan before the baby arrived? Was you gonna study more or did you wanna go into comedy or did you know what was going on? I had things. You never lived at large. I for two I had two months. You had two months? I had two months there where I went hell for leather. I just lost my mind. Because my parents were quite strict. Yeah. Yeah. So I had a summer away and I went belub like I went belu ba's. Do you think them being strict sort of was counterproductive? Yes. It was. Although they were strict on my brothers as well and it worked out with them. But my mum said that I definitely was the hardest because when they say, well obviously I got pregnant, but before that I was the hardest because they would say, you know, you can't you 're not doing that or whatever. I would then come down and present a case of why I should be allowed. Why you know they said that I would never I I would never let it go and I just constantly used to light them. They thought I was like professional bowling and quasar. I mean I was can't the amount of films I was supposedly seeing like I was drinking in fields the whole time. But I just had all these made up friends, all these places I was going and I was just drinking and fields, having a great time. So the plan was just to have Just drinking in fields. Well that's what happens when you're drinking the fields. The plan was there's no plan, but I definitely wasn't gonna like yeah, probably go to college, but probably go to London get the London look. The London Look was big at the time. No one really knows what the London Look was. You know, like on the Rimmel ad with Cake Moscow. It was quite aspirational to go to London. Let's go to London. And um no, it didn't happen. So like into that very early into that school term, say I got pregnant in the August, then in the September. So that's like your big final year, you're gonna do a state exam , everything rides on that state exam in terms of like what college university course you can get. Yeah. It's a like a big huge thing. And then I'm pregnant that year. Oh my word. So I'm pregnant, all girls school pregnant. So who could it have been? Yeah, I know. But that was the other thing. When I say to my when I had to s tell my mother I'm pregnant, I also had to say like I've had sex. That was actually a bigger thing. Yeah, I don't think she was waiting for that part. No, but I was I was embarrassed to go to that. 'Cause she's like, Who? You know what I mean? What? Yeah. Wow, and it was it was it like a boyfriend? It was like a summer If this is too evasive question. Oh no, but it's like a summer because you see this what happens. If you have a child young, yeah, you have to be you have to learn to be quite open about it. Yeah. Because everyone wants to know. Yeah. Because everyone thinks of that could have been me. Yeah. Whether it was like in their twenties or whatever. Or that happened my friend Sarah or my brother John had a kid when he you know everyone knows the the a girl at school that that sort of happened to or in the a Yeah. So everyone always wants to know. So you kind of you you get very comfortable with telling everyone your story. So he was like a summer kind of dalliance. So like very into 'em, but like Nas You're not you're not pushing through that as a relationship, are you? Come on. There's only so much you can do. Was he w was he what at school at the time? He was like uh I think he had just finished and he was yeah he was going to go to college. Right yeah. So I met him I was I'm working in a chipper you call it a chip shop. Chip shop. Chip shop yeah and it's the night he's getting his exam results. So that's the night I meet him. So I'm seeing salt and vinegar and then But we were seeing each other for a while while I was there. Yeah, yeah. Hello So I seen him for a while. Uh living in sorry I'm just actually remembering the story. This is great living in a mobile home. He was living in a mobile home. No, I was. You was. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What near your parents' house or your own? No, so my friend's parents had in Wexford, you know, like by the sea have like a caravan or whatever. So we me and my friend were living in that working each other to be judgmental. I'm not I'm not, I'm just trying to it feels like a a pitch for a sitcom idea. Yeah. So But it's your it's your actual life and I need to remember to be respectful. Okay, I just don't I'm not very good poker foe. So me, my friend, are living in the mobile home, the caravan. You're in a caravan in Wexford, you work at a chip shop, this child talks in who's getting his grades results. Yeah, he's and you two are loving each other. Yeah. And uh so And does he move into the mobile home? No, he doesn't move in, but we see each other No, no, it's not that ridiculous. Come on. W I see I'm kinda seeing him a bit while I'm down there. Yeah. But I have to go home 'cause I'm not finished school yet. Yeah. So at the end of the summer I have to go home. And how fast home was it? Oh, like it's like an hour and a half. You know what I mean? Like we're just done like like you know, seaside town. We got I go back home and then very quickly I'm back at school and I find out very quickly I'm pregnant. Oh, and so how do you tell him? I told him uh because I felt I think from watching like films or something, I was like, okay, you have to tell the dad he's the next person that needs to kinda know. Before your mum. Before my mum. Right. So my friend who I was with knew. Yeah. So this poor friend of mine reading it in the newspaper of the chip show. Yeah, this poor friend of mine, I mean, I told her everything, you know what I mean? So she's my confidence. She was there, like I mean she wasn't the room, but she basically would have been like there's no soundproof. It's a character. Oh, and she she know knows. So s, right? Yeah. She was with his friend. She was with his friend. Oh, this actually well I tell you this bit, this is the funny bit. So we're in the mobile home the night I got pregnant, right? So I'd seen him before, whatever. And we are kind of like pair we're pairing off right with only one condom right so we do we kinda say who's gonna get it. So me and him get it. She doesn't get it. Oh my god. Right. We get us . But it doesn't work. Oh my word. Yeah. Oh wow. Yes. Jesus, what's this car got using nuts? I know powerful stuff. So she knew the whole story, right? And of course she's like you, she's trying not to sit there and kind of just go fucking escape that. Sorry I'm obvious I'm smiling too much. It's great in a way the condom, the faulty condom is giving you an air of oversecurity that she didn't have. Yeah. So she's got lucky by not having the faulty condom. Yeah, yeah. How fault what is it? Faulty. I think he put it I think he made a faulty. I think he put it on wrong. I think he put it on his head. He had it on his nose. Because in my room in the mo in the mobile home the light didn't work. So it was pitch black. So you didn't lose I've not been funny ever. In the dark, I know where my dick is. All these years everything's taken off from. In his defense it was darkened This episode is brought to you by M 's. Josh, would you say you're much of a baker? Ah well, I'm not a huge baker, but I do enjoy bak ing with the kids. Ooh. You know, I'd never do it on my own. Do you do it with your kids? I do bake with the kids and we are big cookie dough guys. Yeah. And we love licking the bowl. Oh yeah. Finger in the bowl, lick off the spoon. Yes., please We're fighting over that bowl. Well, Rob, I've got good news. Whether you've got time or you're trying to avoid destroying the kitchen, sometimes bacon's just not on the cards, is it, Rob? But wait, with the new MM's cookie dough flavour, you can get that licking the spoon moment of joy with no baking required. It's the classic crunchy chocolate shell with a deliciously creamy cookie dough flavoured centre, perfect for sprinkling over popcorn, snacking on through movie night or just enjoying by itself. Click or tap the banner to learn more and try MM's cookie dough available in stores now . Oh wow. So you mean but you're to kid as well, you that's not experienced in condoms? I hadn't a clue. You know what they mean TV? Do you ever see that? I'm still not hundred percent. No, you know, convince eleven. A condom and a banana in daylight's a lot different to a dick in the dark in Wexford in the school and now we're gonna turn the lights off for the next lesson. Out in the field or with the lights off. Try to do it with the lights off. So how did he take it? So I found him and very f it's actually now not funny at the time, but it's very funny now to look back at it, obviously . Uh Chris Rocked was a bit that I then later discovered years later. When a woman brings a man to tell him that she's pregnant, if the guy's response is what you gonna do? Yeah. You know . And that's what he said to me.. Right He's like, What are you gonna do? Yeah. I was like, Well, I don't know what I'm gonna do. Like, I don't know. I I'm gonna ha I was like, I'm gonna have the baby or whatever. Yeah. And he was like, Okay. And that was kind of it like. 'Cause he was like, Are you coming down? I think he was like, you know, ' wecause were still in touch actually. We were still in touch and trying to think so think of ways to meet up. And I was like, Oh, you'd like I'm pregnant and then just this big silence and I was like, He's still there. Oh, yeah. So like so what are you gonna do? Oh god . Oh my god. And I always be very grown up like things with a oh well message everyone. It doesn't happen. He's the first person you've spoken to, so you haven't even kind of spoken to No. No, no. So and I don't have a plan. Nobody knows. The school don't know. My parents don't know. Nobody knows. Oh my word. I'm telling him was if you're looking at a long time and you laughed at it now, but you mu was you completely devastated and panicked and at big star panicked, yeah. Oh like panicked. Yeah. Panicked like pff like I just was on autopilot affair like uh be all that time. Like w when I was growing up, like all girls school you would chat about it as like oh my god, what would you do if you got pregnant? Yeah. What would you do if you got pregnant? I'm like, oh kill myself it's so lie. Oh my god. Do you know what I mean? Like we were like that is the worst thing that this is like, you know, nause es there was no like abortion wasn't available in Ireland. Yeah, just close. Ireland as well. It's a it's a level up island, I think, with that kind of thing. Yeah, you see, and as well, we wouldn't have we would have had like laundries up until the nineties. So now I don't know anyone who went to a laundry, but you know what I mean? Like that takes What's the laundry, sorry if my laundries are do you ever hear of like the ma magdalene laundries? It would have been a thing where back in the day in like Catholic Ireland, if a woman had gotten pregnant, she would go to a laundry to work, to be put to work. So it was run by nuns. She would go there to work in a laundry, you know, like doing a laundry laundry. Bed sheets and all that. And then her baby would be adopted through the laundry. Oh. So that would happen women who say were from like very poor bra backgrounds or if they had been abandoned. So their par their family was like and they'd have no choice, they'd have to give up the baby. They'd have to give up the baby. Oh gosh. Or like so say and this would be like, you know, all sorts of women, but say, if it happened a young girl. Yeah. And if the family if the family didn't have the money to maybe send her off somewhere, you know, like say maybe to a an aunt somewhere else that she could hide away of the five. Was that to stop sort of family shame as Family Shame to do something with the baby. So now there was only I think it like it had all been winding wind,ing down. But you know, like that building was there was still one in Dublin. Yeah, and you would still know people that was their life. And you would hear stories from your own mum of, you know, friends that had gone away . You know, there'd be lots of store lots of adoption stories or that women had gone away, you know, may not have been in a laundry, but would have gone away to like say, I think it would have been quite common to go to like a kind of a nursing home. Yeah. Stay there, have the baby, come back. Bly mate. I was away. Work yeah. Jeez. You know? God. So that I'm not saying that was happening when I was growing up . Tell your mum and dad about it. This this was a thing that happened and you're a eighteen year old kid. Yes. So how did they take it? They were actually great. Yeah. They were great. So uh like now I knew it wasn't gonna be because they were gonna kick me out or they were gonna feel sh ame. I just I knew that they would feel like oh sh uh like everything's gonna be so much harder for her now. Yeah you know it's gonna really it's gonna really change everything. My mum took it really well. I wrote her a letter and I like left the letter and ran out the door and then she came and found me. I just had gone to my friend's house across the road like and she just came over. You know what I mean? I ran away.. Like a child I ran to I ran away to the edge of the road like a thing. And she came and found me and she just said she gave me a big hug and she was like, Come home and you're ready. And my friend was like, What's going on here? And then my dad, she rang my dad and I like 'cause I'm an only girl and I think Oh god he's gonna flip Yeah and he'd been at like would have been like one of those dads like close the door you know those dads Dad's gonna know But he was like, Oh, I quite like the idea of being a grandda so they were really nice about it but then once I tell them they went into like action mode, right? What do we have to do? We have to tell the school, we've to go to the doctor, we've to you know and I'm just worried about my final exam in school 'cause I wanna do I wanna get that done so it's like my if you get that done it does give you options in a couple of years' time, doesn't it, to to further studying when the baby's older. Yeah, you can you can do all that then. You need to have that to move on to third level education. So I want to get that done. But the dates are very tight. Okay. So the exact I think in the end I was basically I had my daughter and then thirteen days later I start the exams. Fuck But you have to do those exams. Like English paper one happens on the Monday morning at nine o'clock. You have to sit that exam then. Right. Ye.ah There's I don't know, I still don't think there is the same exam, so obviously it's the same exam and it's locked in a case and you know all that. Is there any dispense there's no dispensation for someone that's just had a baby? No, and I actually when I went to the maternity hospital, like when I was doing my checkups and it was getting really close. Yeah. And I was worried about So you were gonna do the exam? Oh yeah, doing the exam. So say originally with her her due dates, I would have had four extra dates. Mm-hmm Yeah. So say she was due on the eighteenth but she ended up being born on the twenty second. So I'm going in for appointment on the eighteenth, I think. Yeah. And it's my due date. So I'm like, okay, well they're gonna tell me to stay 'cause she's due today and I have an exam to do. And I was like, they just did the exam, yeah, everything great, fantastic. I think sorry, it's my due day today. What's going on? And she's like, No, it's fine, like this is totally normal and I was like, Yeah I know, but I have to do my leaving cert and she was like don't worry, she's like plenty of girls ha have done their leaving cert in here and I was like I was like I'm not doing my leaving cert in the maternity on the maturity. I was like no . So I started freaking I was start freaking out with them not freaking out. But then so four days later I had her. So I had her in enough time to get back in and do the exam. Where was the baby when you were doing the exam? Yes, the baby, my little baby. I have done have my baby. Also most people are juggling, I might miss that head and do if I'm pregnant then. You're trying to get an exam in. I want to get that exam in. Because I want to move on with me life. No. I wanna move on with me life. I want to because I don't want to be a a grown up there and still in school. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? I was just like, oh no, this is too much. No, it's a load of exams. So you've two you've two exams in English. Uh you've like your Irish. Basically everyone does It' thiss the equivalent of A levels. Yes. So you do six, seven subjects. Every w everyone does six you take the marks from but most people do seven. Right. So you have like your language. Some you might have like a a science subject you know loads. And you're eighteen. You're eighteen. Like yeah, you're like seventeen, eighteen. I'm eighteen. Yeah. So this is so this is so much for you to sort of like deal with. Do you think when your daughter, you know, who's older than that age now, she's twenty two. When you saw her eighteen, did it sort of give you these mad flashbacks of like, oh my God, because when you're eighteen you feel like the old 'cause you are the oldest you've ever been. Yeah. You feel like you're older. When I go back and do uni geek because I see eighteen year olds, I thought they're all being rowdy, they're not there scared little boys and girls. They're babies. Yeah. Oh no, well I tell you this. Not only when she's eighteen, yeah, she's in my old school. So she's in my old school in the exact same uniform. She's got red hair as well. Loads of my teachers that I had then had her. I go back for a parent teacher meeting for the big year, you know, the exam year and one of my old teachers says to me 'cause they all know me, like they all know me. Do you know what I mean? And they s they were all the people that saw the bump and then the their teaching this bump. And one of the teachers said to me, he's like, um he's like, be honest with me now, did you cheat in that history test that time? And I was like, Oh am I getting slack for stuff that for homework I didn't do years ago? I was like, Are you for real? But honestly when I saw her at eighteen, child, baby, I couldn't even and it was during she was in her last year of school during COVID as well. So it was all you know, it's even during COVID, it's such more like the intensity of that. You're only just staring at each other anyway. And I was just like it did really make me think I'm not gonna let her work in a chip shopping works for you just say And no caravans for you. But I was like, Oh my God, I was so young. Yeah. You know, 'cause you don't have time. It doesn't matter what age are or what the circumstances are when you have a baby, you don't have time to really reflect then anyway. Even if everything even if you have your ducks in a row, like your career, your house, whatever it is, you don't have time. No, it was f it felt like absolute chaos that a mess when we were like twenty nine me and Lou, but Yeah. So then when you settle and you've got a baby and you're n eighteen, nineteen by now. Yes. How what do you how do you go what's what's next in your life? Like 'cause you presumably need a job and stuff. You've got a baby and So I ba what I do and my family's very supportive of this. I go to college in the September. So I get no well like in Dublin. So I Dublin I get my marks. Yeah. And I do I actually do all right. Do you stay at home with the baby? Stay at home, yeah. Commuting an hour. And you see most people in Dublin m a lot of them would stay at home. Yeah, yeah. And go to the bottoms a good th isingn' you're the anomaly at the comments. No, no, not in that sense at all. So I get enough marks to get into this like degree course in an IT. Treated at history. Yeah, treated a history. I've gotten in. You know what I mean? What a sad case to remember that. All you've gone on and done. You've sort of like left school, raised this baby, had another two kids, now you're all this sort of comedian that's travelling the world doing gigs and then another teacher was there asking me about my mates, like you are you still in touch with Suzanne and all this and just like as if like oh look look at the old crew back together and I'm like you 're I remember when you was in here and she was doing that exactly for a pint or something like what the fuck Um yeah, so I went to college in the September. My parents were very now like supportive of that. Like go get your degree, you know, and I wanted to I wanted to kind of um see like to do like to get I was like right get a degree, right, don't you know what I mean? 'Cause like I'll get that, I'll get a job, I ha but have to get out because I was like I want to be independent, you know. So my mum is at home minded, my daughter, I go to college but now that was all good and made mates in college and people I'm still friends of. But like it's weird because everyone's like I mean they're in college, so they're all like going to the pub after and whatever. Yeah. And I'm like flying home. Or like, you know, people are so um people like I'm wrecked. I'm so tired. But I but so from a very like very quickly then I never really spoke about parenting around other people because it was so alien to them. Of course. So I was never coming in going, oh I was up all night 'cause no one gave a fuck. Yeah. Obviously their presumption of course. Yeah. Like their presumption presumably is you haven't got a kid straight away. Yeah. So you're constantly having to break this . Is that quite weird and different? It's very weird because what you're like, do I lead with it? Yeah. Or do I wait for a mo like you're constantly it's the big fucking Yeah. Well, especially the guy comes up to you in a bar at the union So my system there was if I didn't like 'em, s first thing out of my mouth. First thing I would say . Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. First thing I would say. Yeah, yeah. And then they'd always say, Oh my sister had had a baby's. I was like, Oh fuck thank and then if I like somebody I would kind of be like but then even still I wa I didn't want to like be in a relationship with anyone so I was kind of in that regard I'd be like Cinderella I'll kind of check in with the male gays and say have a f have a smooch and I'd be gone me, she'll be on the ground. 'Cause I even if I went out with college I'd always be like I'd l I'd kinda leave at twelve. Yeah. Do you know because so I'd kinda be like I w anna I need to get home and like 'cause I'll be up early the next morning. So it was always very sensible. So I don't it kind of created this like bit of mystique around me or whatever and then you're like, Oh I have a child and then it it''ss cool cool, . That is a lot to tell. A nineteen year old fella just trying to get his hold, you know what I mean? Like he thinks you're gonna say, I'm working tomorrow or something or whatever and you're like, no. So and then I think in my final year it was and I ha I w I worked in a pub. Right. But like just a couple of nights a week. But I just wanted to like, you know Have a bit of your own time, yeah. Yeah, just a bit of money and whatever. So yeah, that was kind of working at the pub was kind of my social life. But I didn't really I think towards the end of that degree, like say in the fourth year, I was kind of starting to loosen up. 'Cause then the other kind of reveal was I'd never been like very interested in school or academic or wouldn't you know, I just went up if I hadn't had a child and I'd be going to college, I was like, Oh, let's just go and watch our own way or you know what I mean? Like I'm too hung over today . But because people were making sacrifices so I could do it, I had to be you know, I had to be good, I had to take it seriously. So I kind of as well would like be saying to people like, Oh I'm not actually like this. Yeah. I'm not a big nerd. Just you know, I'm I was mad and I fucked the whole thing up and now I have to be sensible. So just how you know. So I'm not a German alien. If you want to do your well at uni, have a kid. Yeah, it focuses your brain really quickly. When you when your um youngest got a bit older and it was a lot easier, like in school and stuff like that, and childcare was easier and had clubs and stuff and not the intensity of it. And you're like sort of mid-twenties at that point. Did you have a second go crazy period where like you go, do you wanna go to your nan's for the weekend and then you were like fuck it, I'm twenty six, but kids all right, let's just go for it. Yeah, do you know what I I I say that's probably when I met my fella. Alright. That I'm with now. I'd say uh huh, I think like and not that and still oh leave quick, don't you? No five years, four or five years. Yeah. Oh yeah, no, I was ma I was mad about him because I actually uh at that I think it's that station I was working in a com com like thismunity radio station, which I was delighted about because it was short hours, it was close to my house and it was kinda something media something creative. So this is how I feel about work. You know, if it's small short hours are near my house. And I used to see this guy going around, he was an electrician in this new shopping centre. And I used to be doing this thing, this how like how starved of any romance I had been, I'd be going down the escalator and he'd be coming up and I'd try and be like making eyes at him. Like I'd be trying to flirt with strangers in real life, you know what I mean? So I 'd do all this. I'm sure he was like, oh that boy I've understood making eyes. I thought I felt like I was just really staring at women and it felt uncomfortable. You've obviously never had a huge dry spell in your life. Like if you have a if you have a big dry spell, you're throwing eyes at people out at ten o'clock in the the morning on street. Yeah yeah. You're like making eyes of people on the bus. Like it's bad. So I was doing a bit of that but obviously he just thought I had something wrong with me. But I met him out on a night out then. And I read and I thought hell got I So I went hell for leather with him and I remember one night now this is when I was s I was seeing him but I would kinda go to his house but and I would set an alarm to get up to go home. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. To kind of go back to bed for a few hours. Like basically, hi morning, mommy's here. So she ne like she never knew. Yeah. But one morning I forgot to set the alarm. And I woke up with the brightness outside Oh my word and she got up very early. And where's Mummy? Yeah. And I said she shy. So I ran out of his house. And this was like a lad's house, you know, like young fellas in their twenty and I was like, somebody's locked the door, I can't get out the door and I couldn't get out and one of the guys is there and he had just come in and he's like eaten a burger and he's like I'll give you a lift and I was like oh my god nice hammer so I ha I couldn't get out of the house I went out the back, I was like, I'll go out the back and go over the fence. Aha, the fence locked. I had to jump over the fence. I had gotten a taxi. I lost a shoe. I left the shoe. I was like, I'll get the shoe again, went and got into the taxi. Now his house was very close to mine, but I had just got in the door just as she was getting up and my dad was up with her and she was like none the wider and I was like so I was so uh distraught I said to my dad I was like oh my god I can't I just I fell asleep. I fell asleep. I was like, I'm like, you're grand, check grand. Don't be worried about it. I was like, okay, okay. And then I was like, then he was totally cool about it. And like, why you know, he knew I just fallen asleep, and I think you could tell by me. I was like, because I'm nothing like that had ever happened. But then the sudden realisation of it's like seven o'clock in the morning and I'm now up for the whole day. And I was just like this. Like I I probably f I probably fell asleep at like five to six or something. Do you know what I mean? Do you know what I mean? So it was kind of like I was kind of mad with that uh 'cause it was hard I didn't know how to like have a relationship and like date somebody but also be a mum because obviously you're like you don't want to introduce somebody to your child too quickly. No. But you also, if you're like falling in love with like you know, you're kind of like I mean I had the UTI every other week and my mum's like Emma you're burning the candle about ends you're burning the candle about ends and I was like you know it's hard because that's so everything but then you you have to split your sort of Yeah, and you don't want and 'cause uh like you don't know how when to introduce the person and obviously that's a big deal, but you kinda want to try and keep it casual as well. Did he have any kids? He didn't have any kids, no. No, he's always been cool about it from the start then. Yeah. He he and he knew because we kind of had like friends in common and stuff and That's good. Yeah. So he kinda knew I didn't really do like a big reveal kind of thing. And he knew Yeah, but you've got some great stories of the big reveals where it's gone wrong or right. Oh yeah. Men just running away. It's yeah, oh totally. Like sometimes it was very useful. But he was all good about it. And I think he was kind of for his age he was kind of mature in a sense his mum had died when he was like fourteen. So I think he kind of looked at family in a different way as like not a burden but like Yeah. A g like a positive thing or whatever. I was gonna say that's good, but that's not the way to respond to his mum died at 40. Oh that's a relief, you bastard. No, but you know, he he had kind of lived a life or whatever. So um but I was probably going out with him might say for about six months before I did an introduction and it was very I thought it was very low key. Oh he was off and my daughter was off uh I was collecting my daughter from school. So it was just real I was like, Well I I I've t do you can come like if you like and he was like okay and I was like oh you can come and I'll I'll drop you home after that and he's like okay cool and I I got her to the car and I was like oh this is my friend Shane she's like oh hey so it's all very low key I thought it's that great and then years later she said, Oh She's like my eyes were out in stalk. She's just like I knew exactly what was going on. And like that was they all worked out, but I thought it's been so chill. So on it kids. Yeah. They . He sniffed his stuff out straight away. And then when did you start doing comedy and that? Was that like a late thing where you're like Yeah? Had you wanted to do that? Yeah. So I was twenty nine. Now I wouldn't I wanted to do something funny, but like I I don't know how you felt about like stand up but I didn't really think I just didn't I didn't I was like how do you do that? How'd you go about it? Yeah. I didn't really know that it was a a thing. Yeah. And then I kind of I thought I would have like I thought maybe acting or something but maybe something funny, but that to me seemed a bit over the top you know like going off and doing acting after school. So it's just always seemed like people who did acting just didn't work then. Yeah. You know? I was just like, how does that what's the story with that? I was like, that sounds crap. So I never would have done acting. And then I think I had b I had been starting to do like some little things. So basically what I would do is I do kind of add mini jobs and then if I got the chance to do like something a runner or something, I'd do that. And my On TV shows and stuff. Yeah. And my plan was that hopefully somebody would kind of say to me, Emma, why you you need to get out in front here. But everyone says they get discovered. Yeah, of course. I was waiting. I was like if I put myself in the right place, I get discovered. No one discovered me, I think it's everyone only gets discovered after ten years on the circuit. I discovered them and I yeah, you didn't. So then I think a couple uh some guy I made some videos, I sent them to a TV guy, and he said to me like, a real throwaway comment, he's like, You should do stand-up. And I just took it as oh, like you know, just somebody who was like in the biz saying it to you. Who was just thinking, What can I say? What can I say to end this conversation to put a full stop and just say best of luck with everything, goodbye. But I really took that as like, okay, that's like my license. So I was on maternity leave. Yeah. So I've s I'm settled now, I'm with Shane, Ella, we're all having a great time. I planned pregnancy. How I you know Yeah. Yeah. No new for me. No judgment if you have or haven't. Yeah, planned. Survival hap I'm I'm loving life. Yeah. But I haven't really drawn anything creative. I haven't had time. It's too easy for you now. Life's too easy. Oh, second baby. A baby at twenty-nine, come on. I don't have to do any state exams. I can drive. I don't live with my parents. I'm not sure. Yeah, I'm not I'm an adorable. Basically also presumably your first daughter is quite useful. Like it's not like two kids that are arguing, presumably she's quite excited and She's very excited. It's it's it's a great age 'cause I was worried God she she's she's been the focus for so long. But you're not it's such a big age gap. You're not in competition. Yeah. Um, but they have their I but I was like, God, is it g are they gonna even feel like siblings? Is it is that gonna be weird? But they have their own little buzz, the two of them that I've it's nothing to do with me. Yeah. And they the both of them are very academic. They have a very similar kind of personality like traits that aren't me at all. And they have they have their own I'm like, how do they have a never done what's natural nurse? Yeah, I'm like, oh what's going on there? But is it quite quick the conception the second time you just give him a condom in the dark and say go to work Very quick. Came off the pill straight away. 'Cause I thought oh if you come off the pill Yeah. It takes time. No Don't bother like give it six don't even bother to talking to a doctor or getting any way worried until it like six months or a year. Yeah. Now straight away. So I got a bit of a shot. And then with a third as well then. Bang. Bang. You're the most fertile person that's ever existed. Yeah, so I'm in constant fear all the time. I'm constantly a miracle grow advert or so. Yeah, yeah, I'm in real fear all the time. I'm just like , don't don't breathe near me. Yeah. Just in case. Great. No, I'm finished now. I have a twenty two year old. I couldn't go. I mean for perfect symmetry, one in ten years' time would be great, wouldn't it? I mean we'd get a stand-up show out of a start This episode is brought to you by Tesco Club Card, here to help you save with easy jet holidays. We all know the Club Card can help you save on shopping, but I can tell you for free that it's no one trick pony. No no no. You know those lovely club card vouchers you get just from shopping at Tesco? Well, right now, exchanging at least a five-pound voucher gets you double the amount to spend with EasyJet holidays. So next time you pick up a meal deal, you can say to yourself, ooh, that's going towards my ocean view suite. But it gets even better. If you book between the 2nd and 19th of April and travel by the 31st of October 26th and spend more than £1,000 on your holiday, you'll get £100 off with the code Tesco SaveInCapitals. Your club card is your new passport to paradise. Save now, sunbathe later with Tesco Club Card and EasyJet Holidays. Full teas and C's apply, see Tesco.com slash EasyJet Holidays . What was your daughter? He was twelve or whatever when you started stand-up. How was that for her? Yeah, because actually sh so she's kind of been there from like the very, very beginning. So she really remembers the whole thing. Yeah And she only watched a show of mine for the first time the other week. Oh wow. Wow. And she's in it loads. Oh . This particular show. I was actually quite nervous 'cause I think when I started, you know, the way I don't know it took me a while to actually share my actual life. Yeah. You're like nobody cares about my life. Yeah. What's that? And then the second you quit your job, you're like, I used to work in this place. It's so funny. But you're like, you could say that while you're in the job. But so I didn't really and you're doing clubs, so you're like right, people are out on a Wednesday night, they mightn't want to hear about me and my family life and kids and whatever. So it's only like as I've kind of developed it's and obviously it's easier to write material that is about your real life. So she came and I was quite nervous because she was in a her boyfriend was in it. I'd had this real freedom where now and in my f like and my children hadn't really engaged with my material. Yeah. And she came but she really enjoyed it, but she's like, Oh that was really good and we changed conversation straight away and I was like perfect. And when they see you on stage, for most public obviously it is still us on stage, but it's a certain version that's turned up in order to get the job done and to and it's real stor ies but you have to tweak things so it works in a room. And I think a friend or family that really knows you can watch that and go, I understand what my friend or family member's doing here. Yes. But that that's them at their thing, not what they truly believe or feel because they can understand the tone and intonation. So I do think accepting of it. And like when I started, I did uh like I had her in a lot of sketches. Yeah. So I've always filmed like kind of alongside each other, I've always filmed sketches on my phone. And I used to get her in loads of sketches. She used to do loads of them. But she's not any way inclined. Like she can really act and stuff, but she do doesnesn''t wantt want to to. She . Did she tell you? The worst would be she can't, but she wants to. Oh Can you imagine? You need a stage name just to throw people off the scene if she's my child. Um is that the tour you're doing now, which is Immaculate. Immaculate, yeah. And you're doing you've got Soho Theatre at Walthamstok, which is an amazing new venue. Have you been there? I have been there. Well, just outside. I'm glad you said it because I s that's a bit of a long word for me now. Walthamstow. Yeah. Walthamstow. Walthamstow. Well it's all it's all about London a bit, but he's right on the Victoria line. So if if you're it's it's a really good idea. That's your fourth London date of this tour. Yes, I've got to be aware which has done eighty five dates in UK and Ireland. Jesus. Mm-hmm. You've added v a couple more Vicker Streets in Dublin. I'm just gonna add . It's good this, isn't it? I can't believe it. Thirty five thousand tickets sold. Jesus Christ. There we go. Yeah. Unbelievable. Well done both of you. You throw tickets. You throw them up. He's never done that in six years. I know, I'm quite impressed with myself. Quite impressed with myself. And then one of us reads it really quick. Yeah. That's great. So there we go. Immaculate. Where can you get tipped? But you're gonna you think you'll add more London because that one's about to go. Yeah. Have you got a mailing list? I have a mailing list. Sign up to the Emma DoranComedy.com is my Emma Dorancomedy.com. Yeah. Or Emma Doran. You'll find me on the On the web. On the web. On the web. And you worked in IT, didn't you? Got your degree in it, so your website's probably great. Is that what they took was that year one or two they took you the old finger tapping? Yeah. But do you feel like now Rob asked that did you have a moment in your twenties when you were in your late twenties where you had a a freak out, have you gone now I'm my kids are older. Yeah. Now I've is my time. Yes. So my youngest is eleven. Yeah. And I I actually took me a a bit of uh a a c like a little while to twig that they didn't like they still need you but they don't need you in the same way. Or even I suppose maybe that guilt of you know when you'd go somewhere and you kinda have to look at your partner and go I'm I'm gone now so I hope everything yeah works out while I'm gone or you know that guilt or I'd always like if I was in Ireland I'd o like always drive home from gigs really. Yeah. And then like you know, sometimes now recently I've been like, nah, I think it's I should just stay and just and I when I dri I'll drive home in the morning there's nobody up. So I'll kinda just go, what was it? I'll get back at it. Do you mean you driven back right at two AM, woke up at seven they're all asleep until midday. Yeah totally. What was I killing myself for? How are you feeling about the potential to one day be a grandma, a young grandma? Well no, this was the fear. Yeah, you could be a grandmother in your thirties . Oh my word. I mean you don't want that to be the show, do you? I think you ideally you want to be hitting like earliest possible, it's like late forties, early fifties really. But I did think about it as well of I was like if my if this ends up happening to my daughter, yeah, imagine if I reacted poorly. You know what I mean? When did you just play put the blue? Did you learn nothing from me? What's the light on when you gave him the condom ? I did really. This is the funny thing. I actually made a conscious thing of when she was a teenager. I was like, right, I'm really gonna talk to her. Now, my mum did try to talk to me about stuff, but it was very like riddles, you know, like Yeah. We always kinda came away going, What has she just said to me? I haven't really I don't know. And she like oh, you know and it was all very like kind of watch out for the boys and the boys are only you know, the boys are only after one thing and you know I'd rather and t uh to talk about as almost throwaway lines. Yeah, so I thought okay and I I did the thing with my daughter of I did I did talk to her, but still incredibly awkward. I don't think there's any way to get around any of that without it being awkward. Yeah, but also you kn you knew what was going on, you were just unlucky in that instance that the condom didn't you did all you could to not conceive. Oh yeah, but you'd you'd think that I would feel comfortable then talking about like sex and everything with my daughter. I thought oh well so my eight-year old asked me the other day, like this I could I couldn't stop laughing. Well, I was trying to be sensible. She said, Can uh the hamster's call muffin? Can muffin have a baby? I said, Well muffin can't have a baby because she's in the cage alone, there's not a m male hamster in there, and she's a female hamster. And you need a male and a female hamster to have a baby. And she was like, All right, so like how do my mummies and daddies make babies? Like you need a male and a female to have babies and well how does it work? I mean, well the man has a seed and the the the the mum has an egg in the in stomach the ovaries in the womb and that seed needs to go into the egg and when that when that works when that goes into the egg then the baby starts to grow in the mummy. Well wait till we should and so then then if that seed gets into the egg it grows in the mum's belly. Right. Well how does a seed get into the egg? Yeah, classic. So this is the big this is the hard question, right? And you knew you were you were adding that down to the big I'm gonna said but I was hoping I was this is quarter to eight a.m on the school run by the way and I'm not a morning person. So I went, um and then she went, does the daddy just spit in the mummy's mouth? Ha and I'm like fucking hell did you say yes luckily No luckily by some sort of divine intervention something happened outside the car like a weird van went past and went oh that's a weird van and then no one asked me again.. Brilliant And I didn't want to bring up the spitting. 'Cause what's difficult is like I'm comfortable in telling them it but hey he's very young to actual Yeah yeah it's too graphic where I said so I spoke to Lou about it and we said it was fine 'cause that sort of went away. Yes. And uh I said no I said no, they don't spit in the mouth. And then if she asked again I think we're gonna say, Oh um we've got there's a book about that so we can read the book together. Yeah. And then 'cause Louad's got a book. Not the spit in the mouth. That's a book, that's a pamphlet. It's hard to know, isn't it? 'Cause it depends on the child and I do think as well like it's different boys and girls. Yes. I mean you know, like a a girl could be walking around have her period at nine. Yeah. Yeah. You know, but like I look at my sons at n ine, no no no babies. The other side of it is not how you related to your college friends, but you was th thrust into other parents when you were twenty four you were like dealing with presumably thirty five year old parents at the school gates and stuff like that. Oh yeah. What was that like? We I I some of them are really I created enemies, like I really and my d when my daughter was going to school that was like kind of when the you know the class WhatsApp group was in its infancy But it already did WhatsApp exist by then or no. I don't but you know like kind of parents messaging each other and stuff. I think we're still very mad jump between the laundry rooms to WhatsApp and it in one generation I thought I ha I thought that I was the alien mother. I thought that they all knew that I was like the younger ma'am and stuff and there was a few of them who would get to the school early to get first in the queue. So the way it was is they the teacher would send the kids out. So the teacher would in like keep the parents away from the classroom door I'll poke my head out and see what parent is there and I'll send that child out to. the case And that would be a queue. So there'd be a particular group of mams that would get there early to get first in the queue. Right. Yeah, yeah, you see, it's power it's a power play thing. Right . And I really start to despise some of these mams. Like just the politics that was at play there and who you got in the queue with and then somebody letting their friends skip up to the top with the queue. And then the younger the younger woman in the group that's and then all the childminders treat it like dirt . Right. They're treated like dirt in the queue. Because they're not the parents. They're not the parents. Not by me, I'm just saying by those mams that skip the queue. Was there ever a moment though where it flipped the other way, rather than sort of you being a slightly put to the side because you were the younger mum and not the same age where they would go, Oh, you're the younger mum and be shocked that it was you and then you'd be like, Hang on, obviously I am. What what why else you know, it just it does move on because there is that moment where you know you for years you have the thing of like having the other thing is this is my daughter 'cause people assume that it's your sister, that you're minding your sister . And then gradually over time, yeah , people stop asking you to explain what the relationship is, that they know what it is, and nobody you don't that conversation ends then of y Oh you must have been very young or whatever. Oh so sorry, I thought she was your sister. That leaves and then you just go, Oh it's not me anymore. Do you know what I mean? Like oh so I just sort like of I'm um now do I cool? Yeah yeah. I was like, oh right, grant. So that happens, so that you can't have to And that's a little bit a little bit little bit f It's because there's a very time we like And they probably really annoyed you at the start. Yeah you were like She is mine I wish I did didnn't't look so young and people keep asking what age I wasn't and then it's like, oh it's gone now. So nobody asks anymore and uh yeah, it w it went then and then with my sons I mean I really have tried to have as little contact with other parents as possible. I would say that. Does your husband do more of it, your partner do more of it now you're What do you think? So you're very much the default parent He can't he j he he can't do WhatsApp groups. No. Do you know what I mean? Well he can, he doesn't want to . So can't cook, won't cook. He can, he won't. He won't. Yeah. I should look, I should the way the our class WhatsApp group works, it's twenty you know, twenty seven women in that group and there's one man . Mick is floating around in there and Mick is just giving the The old thumbs up. Get out of it. And I wanna meet his wife or whoever he's with and say, What happened how did you add him to the class up secret ? What was it an argument? Did he have an affair? Things have to change around here. Yeah, yeah, what happened? Or is he there's some men that love being in the the classsic. I'm in the WhatApp groups. Both to the and the music tour. Okay. So yeah, it's good. Yeah. But I like being in it so I'm not that active, to be fair. They're they're they're not inactive, but they're they're pure they're not social, they're purely um pragmatic . Has anyone got a record has anyone found a coat with this name in it? Yeah. It's that. Is that ball on? Yeah. That's yeah. The one that really got me going. So my son went into secondary school. So that's in Ireland it's like from the age of eight thirteen to eighteen. That's your secondary sch ool. Some people trying to keep the WhatsApp group going . Oh no. After they've left. Yeah. Just for sort of lowels. For lulls and just kind of checking on the school. So they're all they've got they've got like you know a load of different teachers for all the different subjects. They're keeping that going. They're keeping the class, WhatsApp group going . Then somebody went in and said, I nearly I nearly lost the boy. They said, do we get presents for the teachers now? Well is that once the kids have left? No, no. In this secondary school. Oh no. Misses whoever who's the Spanish. Maybe a form tutor at the end of the year? I was like in Spanish. Spanish? No offense. I was like, yeah. Pardon. I was the Spanish. Not the Spanish. Not the Spanish. Spanish. Not what after what they did in the final of the year. Some people haven't got enough. Would you say that on the group? No. No, no, no. Somebody else said it. Big old thumbnail. Somebody said, no, no, you doubt you no no you don't need to do that and then somebody else piped up and said Oh no maybe just a bottle of wine No Oh no suddenly you're getting a case of wine because there's ten subjects. Of course. You're having to drive up to school and empty your booth. Like I know a harvest festival 'cause it's end of term. And this has been amazing. Good luck with your tour. Thanks so much for having me. So so sign up to the mailing list if you want the new dates that are coming out. Cheers, thank you. Emma Doran. I love that episode. Hall of Famer? Look, first of all, let's say you are quite keen to jump to favourite episode we've ever done. Yeah, yeah. You've got history of that. For me, one of my favourites we've ever done. And I think that holds a little bit more weight than when you said. Exactly. Which I don't know I think that's a fair comment. Totally. Um the way she spoke about being a teenage parent, hilarious. Brilliant storyteller , but also really inspiring for people. Go we look at them up. You don't know what makes it. Oh, right, yeah. I can do more. Yeah. Got a degree in IT. Yeah. I thought it was brilliant. Brilliant. And and I think as well, like when people talk about like a teenage pregnancy, it can it's sort of delivered as the worst possible thing that could ever happen to anyone as a parent. But I think it's quite inspiring that 'Cause it does happen and that's life.. Yeah You can try and do all the right things, all the right lessons, all the right sex education, the right parenting. It can just be unlucky and that happens. But um I just think the way she spoke about it was amazing and like the way her parents rallied around her and they navigated it and never know what's gonna happen. Twenty-two years later, you could be a superb podcast guest. Exactly. And an excellent comedian. Travel the country. Go and see it. Thank you very much for watching. Bye. Bye. That's the outro . Hello parenting hell listeners recognise that voice? Yes, it's Josh Riddickam here . I have got a new podcast, Josh Whiticum's Museum of Pop Culture. And I'm gonna say it, I'm about 85% sure you're gonna love it. Here are the reasons why. Number one, I'm confident if you're listening now you don't hate me and possibly think I'm funny. Number two, I'm confident if you're listening now you like podcasts. Number three, I'm confident if you're listening to me and Rob you prefer pop culture to people talking about things, let's be honest, boring things like history, economics, or politics. I know I do, and that is why I made this podcast. I wanted a show that tells the stories I love from popular culture in the way other podcasts do for drier topics. See above. Basically, I wanted a podcast that realised Millie Vanilli were more interesting than Elizabeth I