Addressing Common Questions and Roadblocks

I am so excited to finally share this with you. I am going on tour. It is the best sex ever tour And I hope you'll join me and the show is all about you, the audience. everyvery night I'm going to be answering your questions, win prizes, and leave with seecrets to have the best sex ever Every night is different because the show is all about you So here's the dates. It's july seventh in Rosemont, Illinois at Zany's thenen heading to Philadelphia on august fifth, Nashville on september twenty ninth and Austin on october seventh Say these to come Hub with your partner, your friend, Fly solo. You'll leave with practical tools plenty of laughs, maybe some surprises. well definitely some surprises. Visit sexwithily d. com slash events for tickets and tour information I will see you there. Can't wait to meet you Pleasure doesn't require perfection. It requires our presence. We have a lot of shame about being sexual, being turned on and have wanting certain desires, and then dropping that critic who says that we are too much or we're not enough. Your pleasure is not personal. Your pleasure is very personal. It's a personal thing to everybody. It is not performative. I shouldn't want this I can't believe I want this to be spanked or I want dirty talk. That judgment keeps us from accepting ourselves. Safety is a really important part of us really being able to let go in the bedroom. So if you felt safe and celebrated and revered, what do you need Hey everyone, Wlcome to Sex with Emily. I'm doctor Emily and my mission is to help you prioritize your pleasure and liberate conversation around sex. This show is all about you. It's about you having better sex, expressing your desires, and knowing exactly what you want. Also be sure to follow me on all social media. It's seex with Emily everywhere. Subscribe to my YouTube channel for f episodes and my newsletter. You're gonna to love my newsletter. I've been told I give a really good newsletter. if you know what I mean It's sex withithunily d. com slash Newsletter. Finally, I am going on tour. I hope you join me I'll be going all over the United States And my first stop is in Chicago on july seventh and the show is all about you. I'll be answering your questions live, we'll playing games, there's giveaways. It's gonna be such a good time. You can find that at sexwumily. com slash events All right everyone, enjoyed this episode. Hi. Okay, so if you've been listening to this show for a while, you know I'm not about random sex toys or gimmicks. I'm about tools that actually support your pleasure, your communication, and your connection. Well that's exactly why we created the shop seex with Emily store. Everything in there is curated by me and my team and these are products I trust, I recommend to clients and would tell my friends about, I do tell my friends about What I talk about all the time. Whether you're exploring solo pleasure, looking to reconnect with a partner, or you really just want something body safe and beginner friendly, We've organized it so you don't feel overwhelmed. People love the Dame pillow for supported sex, The magic wand waterproof. Oh my god, it's so good. Cray vesper, massage candles, joeve flavored lube, We vibe touch, clitoral vibrators. There's just so many things on there because pleasure shouldn't be confusing feel empowering. You can check it out at shop. sexwithmily. com and find something that supports where you are right now or just click the link in the show notes. Also, keep an eye out for curated collections coming soon. Everybody. J in Welcome to our fifth pillar today. It's a very exciting day. This is our fifth pillar. We've done it. We've made it. The fifth pillar of sex IQ are sexual intelligence, which is bringing together all of the pillars that is going to help us have more pleasure in our life, understand who we are as sexual beings Learn to ask for what I want, feel better in our bodies And as a reminder, the first pillar was is embodiment The second one is health The thirird one is collaboration. The fourth one is self knowledge. And Today we are on self And this is the pillar that is about us accepting ourselves as we are that. releasing the judgment, stopping any of the performance Pformative sex worry Judgment about our bodies, judgment about our experience. and just learning to feel comfortable in our bodies, knowing that we are deserving of pleasure. So let's start with a little bit of a breathwork just for a We'll repeat this about three, four times A little bit of box breathing Inhale through your nose for four, hold for four, exhale for four and then you hold again. So we're gonna inhale to Three for Hold, exhale B. Inhale. called Hold sell All right, thank you for joining here. Let yourself soften to the moment Tk some time for yourself in the middle of the day. You don't have to be anyone anywhere else. to be anyone else and you are enough in this moment. So what does self acceptance really mean? So it's really about accepting ourselves as we are today. We are worthy We are enough and learning to reclaiming our worthiness. You know, there's so much self improvement talk and we're never enough and we're not okay. And every time you turn on the TV or' on TikTok or wherever you are, it's like do this to be about, take this supplement, do this exercise, do this manifestation technique, do this thing, get this job. And it's really, really hard in today's culture to think, take a moment and be like I'm enough I've done enough, I am enough, I've learned enough And everything will tell you this. All the wisdom tells you that The more we come home to ourselves and truly accept that we are perfect as we are in this moment It really does shift R perspective. I know my anxiety goes down just saying that I'm like, okay. I've done enough, I am enough. Pleasure doesn't require perfection. It requires our presence. And just all of you being here today are very present with this too. You're present in this moment. and I think that we think we put so many conditions on sex and on pleasure, like we have to look a certain way and have this many orgasms and approach our partners in this way of sex this many times a week and our sex is never enough either, right And once we just realize that it's really about being present and not being perfect. And that's in this context, self acceptance is embracing our body truly as it is today. not what we think it should be, not what it was in the past and That's a big part of this, is like the self confidence piece and then acknowledging our past without letting it design our future, define our future., there's so much thought about like, well, if I was a better lover or I could learn all these skills or in blaming ourselves for our past sexual activities or thinking our partners had more sex and knows more than we do. There's just all this like judgment about performance, which we want to because It really can keep us from having more pleasure And releasing shame too around our turn ons and our desires and our perceived differences, right? We have a lot of shame about being sexual being turned on and have wanting certain desires and then dropping that critic who says that we are too much or we're not enough So this pillar says, I deserve pleasure now in a different body, not in a different relationship, not in a different context, but today I am worthy pleasure and that's what self acceptance is about So The thing about self acceptance and about confidence is it's not of destination It's not a place that you get to and you are fully confident forever. Now I'm confident and I'm going to work on other things I think we all know that confidence is a journey. And it is, you know, you're not going to learn to love every part of yourself every single day. It is certainly a practice And it's a practice where we have to let go sometimes of of that the grief of what we were or the dis or the shame around our bodies. And some of these phrases might help you think about how you could reframe it I might not feel sexy twenty four seven, but I still get to experience pleasure or like, I carry scars with me. literally. emotionally, physically And I still deserve to be touched with great reverence and deep reverence. or this is the body I have It gets me to and fro and I am worthy of pleasure. And I got to remind you that we do carry so much shame in our bodies that we don't even realize that we're carrying. We've been taught that our bodies were shameful from a really young age or that even having sexual desire is dangerous or maybe it was dangerous for us and some common shame narratives I'm broken because I don't orgasm in a certain way. Like that the core belief is there's a right way to do sex and there's a wrong way to do sex. But the truth is there is No standard. Your pleasure is not personal Your pleasure is very personal. It's a personal thing to everybody. It is not performative. I find this to be a really big one that we just are constantly judging ourselves against the sex that we think we shouldnt be having. We assume other people are having different kinds of sex So that's a really big one An big core belief is my body isn't sexy enough. to be desirered. No one's going to want me. No one's going to like my body as it is And you know only the core belief there is like only certain bodies get to be erotic. Like if I look a certain way, those bodies have more pleasure than I do Obviously none of this is the truth because the truth here is All of us, we all deserve pleasure. We're already worthy of desire of pleasure as we are today. And I don't expect anybody to be like, oh yeah, I got it I'm out like that's I feel that. But again, just knowing that and hearing it and having these like affirmations written in your phone or if you need to do a little presex ritual where you are reminding yourself that you are worthy of pleasure and remind yourself what pleasure feels like could help anchor in this core belief And this core wisdom that self acceptance is a really worthy pillar. and that your body's worthy of pleasure. And it's important that like when we don't accept ourselves And we just have so much negative self talk around our bodies. It really makes it hard to be Present A great exercise for this is our mirror talkal exercise and you could try this tonight or this week where you just look in the mirror You could be naked, you could be clothed, this is completely your choice. and you could say, this is my body It has carried me through life I've survived It deserves love, it deserves pleasure I know that feels awkward. It can feel very awkward. There's really so much power in making eye contact with ourselves and our bodies because if you think about it, we're asking someone else to do that. We are asking our partners to look at us, right? or we don't want to be seen by our partners, but then we don't want to see ourselves. and if no one's looking at ourselves and Who is? like what is it? Like it's just shame and distrust and negativity all around. So this practice of deeply connecting to ourselves You could always try, read a tip of the week called W Yourself in the mirror and I do talk about this. I talk about watch yourself during solo sex, but even the practice of every morning, look at your body when you're having sex or when you're self pleasuring, It' just like, good morning, I love you. Like when you're brushing your teeth, don't look away. You know, we're always in our thoughts, but sometimes I just look at myself and I'm like, okay. Today's day I love you. You're good. You got this, right? Like even if it's just for a few minutes and you build on that I love building Stacking habits on toothbrushing, teetothbrushing. because you know it's the one thing we do every day. Hopefully Other things can be hard. So it's like I my supplements my toothbrush, I drink my water. You know, there's so just to say like I'm gonna to look in the mirror today. Like today I'm gonna like be like, you are awesome. You are deserving of pleasure. Today is going to be a great day I mean Again, it might seem contrive, but If we're not doing that, where is your head in the moment that you're brushing your teeth? Are you thinking about what's next? Are you thinking about what happened in the past You're thinking about your day, but what if you just take a moment to deeply connect with yourself That's going to really help towards this self acceptance And the pleasure thieves that steal self acceptance, I've talked about stress, trauma and shame, but when it comes with those are the pleasure thieves But when it comes to self acceptance, a big one is the comparison fe Oh, well, they look better than I do. Everyone looks better than I do. I don't have the same body as my partner or as this person I just saw walking down the street or what I see in porn. This is a really big part of this this shame. We compare, we compare. We think we should be something else Another thing is judgment about our desires and our preferences. I shouldn't want this. I can't believe I want this to be spaint or I want dirty talk or I want this often or not this often, right? That judgment keeps us from accepting ourselves. And then perfectionism. I can't be intimate until I have the perfect body. I have the perfect moves These are all really deep parts of the thieves, the comparison, the judgment and the perfection of thieves. Does that resonate with any of you? Can you hear those in your head? And can you imagine If those stack up over time how much their keeping you from pleasure, It's really hard to be fully embodied and to be fully present when these thoughts are just running wild in our head. and You know, self acceptance is truly a practice. It is a really deep practice. It's probably one of the most important practices out there Because we need it in life, not just in the bedroom and for our pleasure and our sexuality, but just accepting that we are good enough and we're doing enough and we're doing what we can And it's just, I don't know, a daily reminder to accept us as we are. again, this like improvement culture this you got to do this every day and do that thing every day and improve and improve and improve really just doesn't allow us a lot of room for self acceptance. So this pillar comes alive in small everyday moments So maybe it's saying yes yes to sex, even if you didn't shave or you You don't feel great in your body today, but just saying, you know what? I'm going to say yes and then I'm going ice some embodiment, which we learned in the first pillar Yeah, I don't feel good em bbody, but I'm gonna practice bre in with my partner or'm going I'm going to practice collaborating with my partner right now where we can talk about something that we really want and then It'll sort of take over from that worry, right If we know that we're being present or we're actually working to collaborating with our partner and having sex a way that feels good. Another thing is giving oursel permission to rest instead of perform. Maybe you really truly don't want to have sex. feel like this would just be performative. it's okay to say no And I'm just gonna take rest. or also exploring what feels good, not what you think feels good, taking a beep and saying, you know what? I'm actually going to spend the next week J with some solo sex time, figuring out what it actually like. I know that Emily's mentioned that a lot But I haven't done that yet. So I'm just gonna to explore. I'm going to get curious about my own pleasure and what feels good And another thing that might help you here is releasing orgasm as a measure of success and leaning into connection So much of wonderful sex and the memorable sex and the sex that we crave is really just about connection and feeling connected to our partnner. So it might be resolving some some things that have come up for us or some fights or disconnects with our partner and just saying like it's not just about orgasm, it's about Knowing that's is about orgasm, orgasm is very is important Sometimes we just think that's the only measure, like orgasm is the measure, but I like to remind you that pleasure is the measure Having more pleasure is the measure into the kind of sex that you will Be craving and that will be and Memorable. Memorable because people are like, what kind of sex do you remember, you know kind of sex do you crave? and it's usually where we felt like to somebody and You could try asking yourself here, what could change if I believed that eyes are already enough. So take a moment and think If you truly believed that you arere enough Your body was enough, you've done enough. What could my sex life be like So may me just a second to think about that. You felt really great in your body, Would you feel more free to move about. in the bedroom and to really express yourself. What could change if I believe that I was enough? You also could ask yourself, what are the things I need to feel safe and celebrated Safetyies are really important partart of us really being able to Go in the bedroom So if you felt safe and celebrated and Revered, what do you need You know, are there words that you need to hear from your partner or from yourself? Are there certain protocols, certain repairs that you need in your relationship? Think about that This episode is brought to you by Google Health. Stop chasing someone else's definition of health. What matters is what's healthy for you. Google Health offers a new kind of coach, built with Gemini for effortless tracking, sleep insights, and holistic coaching tailored to you. Visit googlestore. com to learn more and start a new relationship with your health. requires Google account, Google Health app, Internet, and Google Health Pmium subscript Features subject to change, availability and results vary, not intended for medical purposes, Wors independently of Gemini apps, cheheck responses for accuracy Hey, it's Kelly Rolan. You may not know this, but I have eczema. so I get how it can steal your time. But why let eczema take over when you can talk to your doctor about EblS? EblS Labrizmab LBKZ, a two hundred fifty milligram per two milliliter injection is a prescription medicine used to treat adults and children twelve years of age and older, who weigh at least eighty eight pounds or forty kilograms with moderate to severe eczema Also called a topic dermatitis that is not well controlled with prescription therapies used on the skin, or topicals, or who cannot use topical therapies, EBGLS can be used with or without topical corticosteroids. Don't use if you are allergic to eGlS. Allergic reactions can occur that can be severe, eye problems can occur. Tell your doctor if you have new or worsening eye problems. You should not receive a live vaccine when treated with eBGlS. Before starting EBGLS, tell your doctor if you have a parasitic infection ay partnership with Lily. Respect your time. Ask your doctor about EpllS and visit EpplS dot com or call one eight hundred Lily R X or one eight hundred five four five five nine seven nine And then ask yourself, where could I bring more softness to my inner dialogue Where am I being really harsh on myself right now? Where am I being unforgivven? Could you soften around those edges? Could you replace it with some more friendly, loving thoughts I am deserving of pleasure. My body is built for pleasure. I'm excited to have pleasure. My body thrives with pleasure. My whole life is better when I welcome in pleasure. For this week, supported thing herear on the chat about this that made you think anything. I love like thinking about the inner dialogue. We did a great sessa this week. I think it was one of my favorites that we've done and I actually use some of those tools this weekend. I was feeling disconnected from my body. I was out I was in Las Vegas at a concert and I started feeling like anxious about the crowds and things that were happening. and I was remembering some things that she told us about Because a lot of times a lot of our fears and the negative thoughts we have or the inner child, stuff from our childhood that are no longer true, likeike, I'm not safe I remember feeling that She had this great line where she was like When you're feeling that, remember that I'm an adult now Khease I have a credit card. I can escape I can leave. I'm in charge. I'm running the show. Those exercises were so powerful. Yeah, thanks for posting that. I know, Alexa and I had some really big big feelings around that. really powerful releases. So Again, it's it was just a I just a lot of self acceptance is again about reframing our core beliefs and our thoughts. Our core beliefs is programmed in our head from a very young age that we don't even realize that we are the ones that continue to feed them to ourselves that's taking us away pleasure and they just don't serve us at all So some action steps, something that we can do this week, you could choose one act of like some radical self acceptance for you for you to reclaim your pleasure, your worthiness, your desire, mayaybe wear something sexy just for you. whether it's lingerie or we something that makes you feel sexy, It's just about you I did something was I? Oh last night Sah, who did a wonderful somatic dance release here. if anyone saw that. He did a live performance, a live exercise in LA. last night It was incredible. and it was like walking like you are like the most confident in the world. Like walking like you because you did a whole death and rebirth. L walking like you were just born. Like you have released everything and you are yourself and you're confident And it took a moment, like it was easier to act like do the stuff that was about like releasing and pain, but then to be like I am the most confident For least pure version of myself and I'm walking through life. We all like walkking in the room and it was like, take a moment, but when you think about it, like, what is that version of you that is the sexiest that does feel the best in your body? Who is who is this person Have you ever seen them? Can you think of a timewn where you felt that way And if not It's interesting to think that it's just going to happen all of a sudden with a partner. That's why I love this stuff is practice. like practice walking around feeling good, looking in the mirror Dancing for yourself It's really freaking powerful awkward, it's not easy But if you think about it, how else is it going to happen? Has it happened yet? How iss that going for you Right? Like if it hasn't happened yet, from all these other things you tried, we have to give it to ourselves. It's our own inner power O inner straintths, our inner knowing that we are enough and that we are sexy. Another action you could try is compliment your body out loud. So we're doing the mirror exercise, you' be like, I look good Like I love the way my shoulders look in this top My hands are really like sexy or I love my thighs or I You know, I love the nape of my neck, whatever it is, I love the color of my eyes. likeike saying that to yourself We so deeply crave that from other people, affirmation. People think I'm hot enough. they love me enough. I get enough likes, I get enough affirmations We're not giving it to ourselves. But I think the reason why we crave so much of that by others is because we literally have negative limiting beliefs. Like why would we need it if we were giving it to ourselves enough? So complimenting your body out loud. Ebe when you're brushing teh in morning you're al looking in the mirr You get out of the shower Right Try that one You could also try doing a solo sex session, masturbation, AK masturbation, just for exploration, just getting curious about what feels good What do I actually like? What kind of touch feels good to me? What kind of movement feels good to me? What kind of sounds feel good to me? Sound is such a big part of pleasure. moaning, making noise that's commensurate with what we're actually feeling. A lot of us have never used our voice to express pleasure, you know, because we think it's gonna to sound funny. and just practicing like letting go with your own while you're pleasuring yourself is just a great way to practice that. So when you are with a partner, when you're with your partner You've already experienced it But sometimes we don't even realize that we've been so quiet during sex. So it also helps with blood flow. It helps us actually experience more pleasure the more we make noises and moans and sounds and screams and all those things. And then journal. another promp for this week, another action step would be journaling about what you do if shame wasn't calling the shots. We talked about some ways shame shows up, right If Samee wasn't telling you that you're not having sex enough or the right way or your body wasn't looking the right way. Like what would you do sexually in bedroom, but also in life if your shame wasn't calling the shots What would you ask for Who would you be What would you say? What would you be doing? How would you be living How would it change your relationships? How would it change your connection to your body to others, to relationships Shame is that, you know, you're not enough ot good You're doing it wrong. It's not even possible J imagine how much freedom you have to really explore what you are worthy of, what you deserve, and what it would look like. what would it actually look like? Move to it. Visualization is great, but sometimes we got to move to it, we gott to feel it, right? Like walk. I want to walk thinking about like, okay, I have no shame. What am I doing with my life? Feels good. What decisions am I making? Try it Yeah it goes, self acceptance is a really big unlock. It really is when you're like, o, I'm the one who's not even letting myself. I'm blocking myself. And it can unlock so much more pleasure in our life this moment is up trying to be better and we just honor where we are and who we are today Sex can become more healing and expansive and pleasurable and real, which is more real 'ause I guarantee your partner's got these things going on in their head too, that they should do more. they should be more that their body isn't shaped right that this was different to be better I mean, none that is true. L sex is energy, right? So we all actually have enough right now today to have the most pleasure. It's like all available to us now and now that we've worked through all of the pillars. So what if we stop trying to be better? Sure, we are trying to to be better versions of ourselves, but also remembering that we also are enough in this moment Like I'm giving you just so many tools all the time But also you get to take what you like and leave the rest. O thing You could take one thing from each pillar Right? Like there's just what you have to do it all. No one does it all. I don't even like telling you to do something every day. That's why I give you so many options because you never know what's gonna connect with somebody. We're all so different. We're all bioindividual Right So Any of these, just do one, it could work for you. So a challenge for you Do one thing that honors your wholeness as you are now, not who you're trying to be. who you already are today. So just remember You're not too much You are absolutely enough. You are worthy of pleasure And there's nothing wrong with you Now, that's our self acceptance pillar and that wraps up the pillars. And so when I talk about bringing it all together I want to talk about bring all of the sexual intelligence together for a moment. and you could go back if you've missed any of the pillars and watch those again But even if anything, knowing like embodiment, like we've been breathing at the startart of all of these, like, will help you be more embodied pres help you be more present during sex, even if you did some breathing. looking at noticing the senses around you, what you're smelling, what you'rearing, what you're tasting, you could really practice that. the next time you are seeking pleasure And then for health Are you moving your body? eating foods that make you feel good? Are you? chehecking out your medications and making sure that they're all working for you, not with you looking against you, looking at side effects And then collaboration, you knowre having one conversation with your partner this week, this month Today that is about connection because sex really is a collaboration. Is there anything in there that you could do and then You know, self knowledge, like what what do we know about ourselves today? What do we know that feels good? What do we really learn about our own pleasure and what we actually require is really the success that we are Enough So are there any questions about self acceptance or any of these pillars so far? Anything come up for you. I love answering questions. But this one came in. My partner located my G spot, which felt amazing. And once he started to apply some pressure, I didn't want him to stop. However just when I thought I could possibly orgasm and have a release Bard, my body started to tense up. just like it does when it does oral or stimulation. What's your take on it? I can't seem to figure out, especially since I'm absorbing and taking it all in for this wonderful pleasure So it sounds like. Um person is trying to have an orgasm, maybe have some siring female ejaculation, but it's just not happening U justust remember that It's a practice. It's not going to happen the first time It's really helpful to have a G spot orgasm on your own first. but without your partner because there's so much pressure in that So I would actually Definitely practice on your own and Your breath Foccusing on your breath. and not in your head. So you're able to explain this make you tense up I didn't want to stop. you could ever release and your body tse up. I would when it's tenensing up, I would breathe. I would breathe deep into your pelvic floor, feel the breath moving through your body and then release it. Consciously taking so deep breaths. relaxing your pelvic floor area and just you know, being present with the moment, going back to your breath. When you go back to your breath, you can't really be in your head as much. And then give feed back to your partner. Maybe they need to slow down a bit or a lighter touch help you stay in that spot without tipping over into the tension. Like there is a moment of of too much not enough. I think we feel like sex has to keep escalating and escalating and we can't slow it down and go back up again, but that's also what we call edging. So There just might be a learned pattern in your body that you should going or that you tense up And so slowing it down, breathing, stopping and starting again. Maybe taking the pressure off your D spot and going back to oral sex for a minute and then going back to the G spot or going back to kissing switching it up breathing into it and you can also tense and relax your pelvic floor too Do a kegle while you're while you're experiencing that. That could also help Tensing and relaxing, tensing and relaxing, pumping those pelvic floor muscles, those PC muscles could also really help But this is a common question for many common scenario that many people get themselves into so happens a lot and sllowing down and breathing is going to help us a lot during sex. So thank you for that question Please let me know if you guys have questions that you want to answer, just put them in. I got you. Thank you everybody for joining. I so appreciate you all and I hope you enjoyed the pillars. I can't wait to hear. So Cynthia, I justs got a question your biggest roadblock is self acceptance. You've asked your partner if you could have the lights off when you're together, take the pressure off and get in my head. but my partner requires visual stimulation. You've come to a fork in the road, Any suggestions? That is a great question there So the lights off, that is a really big part of the self acceptance. A lot of people have trouble that they want the lights off because we're not feeling great in our own bodies And so Cynthy, I'm hoping that maybe some of these exercises we talked about today might help you Take some baby steps towards your own acceptance and How do you Well here's a few suggestions. How do you feel about a candle instead of the overhead lights. I don't even turn over headlights out of my house ever But also, what about wearing something that makes you feel sexy You don't have to be totally naked Do you have a little lie like a gown or something like a lingerie gown or a nighty that makes you feel good or like a little teddy, knee socks or you, is there any kind of things that you wear that make you feel good off the shoulder top? and you don't to be totally naked during sex either So That might be a nice way to compromise because you might find that once you're feeling that the lights aren't on you. it's the right kind of light, dimming the lights. I'm wondering if that makes a difference at all. And Yeah, a little bit candlelight flinkering in the back putting a putting a shirt like a blanket over the over the lamp Dim light. Be I understand that also we talk about connection during sex and it can't be hard just to be to be in our heads So Cynthia for you, I would say that doing any one of these exercises might help you feel start to feel more comfortable since this is your biggest challenge. I'm so glad you came today And I hope that someome of these action steps might help you. I think they will process I've seen many people have very similar light out lights out requests and once they start to look in the mirror have more positive affirmations. it flips. it takes place patience and presence, but you're going to get there Thank you, everybody for joining I so appreciate you all We got this. We got we got the five pillars, we got sex IQ We're going to have some variety next week and I just appreciate you all so much. Let us know what you need and got you