Closing Thoughts And Upcoming Comedy Shows

Oh hello, it's Harriet and I've just come on to let you know that I'm on tour. Later in the year I'm bringing my show Fuie to you fluszing about the UK. Lots of new shows have been added, Edinburgh, Glasgow, Manchester, Birmingham, London, New Date there and we've added Winchester Froom got in trouble for pronouncing that wrong. Froom, Taunton, Leeds, Milton Cunes, Leicester, Margate, Farnham, and let's not forget, Colchester. You can get tickets at harrietkeemesley dot com and I'd love to see you there I'm very glad to. And I'm Hriette Kemesley. We're both single and in our thirties and we've found ourselves back on the dating scene Landscape has changed. We want to settle down. but we're back out there. We're desperately trying to figure out what the hell we should be doing. So we're going to speak to experts, chat about dates we've been on if we manage to get any and share your tips and horror stories. So we all feel less alone. We might even get our exes on. Yeah, we'll see about that This is Single ladies in your area Hey ye, I'm excited for this episode. Hello. Hello. Hello. I feel like I just woke you up. Fucky see you here. I know where you are? No, I'm back in the room. I did that thing where I just thought I'll just look at my phone very quickly and then d when something catches your eye that you don't quite understand. Yes. And then You know, you know the thing. Yeah. we know we know the thing. We're business ladies. We're business ladady. Can't stop. can't stop, Won't stop. whyy stop Need to stop. to stop must stop stopop. I'm excited for this episode because it is an insight into your home life is Yeah, we're gonna have my wonderful housemate, Jordan Brooks on and hopefully doesn't spill Too much information. I'd actually hate to know what he thought of living with me. He loves it so much. Yeah, I really think he would love it so much. But I mean, we can ask him and I. Let's get to the bottom that, shall we? He's very patient with me. I do a lot of like cururrently I put all the clothes in my wardrobe. Not all sixty percent of hes into black binliners to give to charity and I book to charity collection when there's so much, they can just come and pick it up. all outside and then the message saying, No, we're not coming until May So currently there's like seven or eight black bin liners have closed just in the kitchen. Which I think is a good a good environment. It's like a beanbag. It's like a beanbag party. That's fun. It's It's fun. George had actually put a video on Instagram the other day, which I was gonna share and then I saw all the binbags in the background on the thoughtot. I can't can't sh that way. But it was so funny. It was his birthday. So it had gone midnight, it'd become his birthday And I've got a video of him, You know, when you can search by talking into your remote what you understand. It never understands And there's him. it's one of the funniest things I've ever seen for two minutes with no like Joy, he's just doing it very earnestly going Fart on dog pranks. Fart on dog prank. Fat on dog prank I really want to sh show this video Fart on Dog prrank And eventually we find it and he shows me this video of Dy who goes around the park with a fart machine in his pocket and pretends to fart on other people's dogs and it doesn't sound like it would be funny. Yeah. It's actually the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life. We Dying with laughter Be he does it so nicely, he goes, Hey, can can I stroke your dog they're like, oh yeah, yeah yeah, he's friendly. And he gives them a nice stroke. and then he just like sort of presents his bumb near them and it goes And he goes, sometimes they like that And the owners are always like, because he's been so nice. They're sort of like baffled, like, okay I'm gonna send you it. It's so funny. You had you stoned, would you say with No comment Yeah It was a great night. I'm gl I'm glad. So we've got our Wonderful housemate, not mine. We've got your wonderful your wonderful housemate on. Yes. And he's here. Is here? please welcome. Jordan. It's a match This is very exciting because we have a podcast first. Go on. A house mate is on the podcast. And it's not mine. It she's fine. It's yours. It's mine M. Y fantastic comedian Jordan Broks. We weren't. We weren't sure if you were gonna clap, I wasn't sure. You started and then I you clam So then I I just keep this going forty five minutes going I have himself on. It's so weird because We live together. Yeah, but this is our home, the sto. So it's like welcoming my housemate into a different home. It's your second home. second home? Yeah, you a second home? You you for calling this your second home. I make my so happy which is your favourite home? You just need to go to the toilet for. She always says that that's I actually her favorite home. This is the toilet, so I know that about her. so there we go. Jordan, it's so nice to have you here. Thanks for having me. That's a treat. I don't have many boys on. So I'm told. Yeah. Yeah. why is mean You mean so toad of them? think it is scary. Yeah, we only get the really scary ones on should. Yeah. God, Stephen Bailey, a menace monster Cion. Yeah Is that the kind of thing that gets cut or yeah, it's just wriding down It's wriding down' gone. That's gone I want that in. We were saying that So Jordan From living with me, you get the other side to a lot of the stories that I've told on the podcast. Yeah ye yeah. For example on the live podcast specifically we told a story of what I did behind a bin And you have met the m said.'ve met the building you've met the bin.ve You've seen that bin. I You that in every day. Yeah, it's actually a tiny wastebasket in my my bedroom Don't you talk about me like that Oh, Amy's another waste basket. N large Absolute wastebask get a man Absolute worst back bin. But she loves him L is love. And to be fair he's better than some other ones before. Yeah be be fair. Oh, it's bad, isn't it when a bin's an upgrade It's not ideal. But but so Jordan's met like I think just one guy, have you S Wan Bin. I've met Wan Bin. yeah. I think so. Yeah. Yeah. ye. He was very sweet. He was very sw He was a sweet boy. He's a sweet boy. That's not what we want. No No, we mustn't. We mustn't. I think it was way you said we as well. L it was like that one dis O ongoing dialogue basasically her therapy is going. That's not what we want, is it?? Do we want that energy in the house? No I don't think want sweet? No. Do bin full of rose petals? No full of knives and use needles for. I will say as well it's good to have you birth here because You both give different advice. So it'd be good to like finally clean. No way. Really? Interesting. So for an example Talking about text messages So I told Jordan I wanted to send a text message to a man I have a crush on who I was gonna to see that night saying, shouldould I shake my legs for the night? And Jordan was like Yeah, dude So one of us gives bad advice and that person's joice. I just want to clarify this though yeah, it was more like, yeah, dude Yeah, dude, whatever. It's more like I'm in the middle of something sick of about your crashes. Yeah, dude. That's good. Yeah, Dude. sounds amazing I like, Okaykay, and then but I didn't do it. Th then I told Harriet I was gonna do it and Harriet said, No, that's bad, that's bad Sci At I know really? Yeah Well No, that's not what I was going. Oh, I that. I was just bringing myself down before you did anyway to even comment on anything I don't even know what was the point. Oh gosh, you're spiraling. I can't remember why No, I thought I said I think it's quite hot. it's quite cool. Yeah to say that But And if a guy says, Oh, that's a hot message and you're like, well, I want you. But the argument against it, which I think we did talk ourselves out of it, which I did I think at the time, we settled on not doing it ultimately because if he doesn't reply, that is such that' so you're gonna feel so vulnerable. You're right. So you didn't do it. I didn't do it That's good at that good advice ye. But we went right we explored it. Yeah. Yeah. yeah. Jordan's very good. He listens and lets me myself out of being terrified. And I don't say a word I just stare her until she comes to the right conclusion. I go Y. Can I just go? No. no. So if you were to get that message So say tonight you were going somewhere and you would get that message and you It wasn't like a thing that was definite. Yeah Would you be happy to get that message? Well, it depends. I mean, I was interested in the person it literally depends. And I guess like part of this particular situation is like you' like kind of. Kind of sure there's something, but you're not want h you're not not certain enough to take to p That's it. It's a great message if they're definitely into you. It's an awful message if they're not because then that's You're. Oh God God. manan who I was like friends with all like a prof like We're not even friend, like this guy, we're not even friends. If a man who I' like, gigs with, say who I liked, but genuinely had no feelings for, said shouldhould I wash my bowls for tonight shave my legs. I wouldn't like I never want to see him again. L that's all is' shave my leg tonight. It' those weird hairs that go up and sprout out the middle. Sh I got my initialg? S I Sould do yours? Yeah is' it's hard to know what. I think it doesn't have to be that extreme. Yeah. That's my thinking is it doesn't have to So what was your so your advice was just don't send anything best thing when you suggested that Do want to hang out That was that wasing down, bring down the shakes a little bit Oh well you can't say no to that. It's the only thing. If you're not into it, you can't say no, I don't want to hang I think I think it's more vulnerable to say, do you want to hang out Really? Because that's more exclusive. Whereas with the leg thing? It be like joke. With the leg thing.. I've had lazy hair D shave them, don't shave them, whatever dude. But if it's like do you want to hang out, it's like, well, there's there's an tterior. Okay so what do what today What you do? What do we do, George? What do? How do we get boyfriends? How do we get How do we get rid of this part? Yes. title and it's just ladies in your area. Or we get rid of the Ly and it just says sing ladies in your area aast singing group.. I I don't know. We do. It's all part of the dance though isn't it? There there's no Amy doesn't want to dance. Amy want dancecer doesn't want She's a very good dancer. She's not in the mood for dance. not bad It is a right's a really good a good Gun to the head I will head little Gun to the head, hostile situation I will do it j. I'm like, I'm done. I just I'm done with that now want to like get straight to the It's just so much admin Do you know to like cook someone in But isn't isn't the admin part of the thrill of the This is and I I think men do like that as well. Like I think you like the the frzz on which you do liar, you just want to you know what it is? I'm finding men where there's no real frisson and trying to generate a frisson. If the Fr son's coming back, That's the dance, that's what I enjoy. You're going for men that are not available. But isn't the argument also that those types of men U. not like the thrill of the thing is all it is rather than it being a means to to a more stable outcome. s like The guy that I met that was lovely. Yeah. there was no like he was just very much straight up transactional It' transactional Yeah. but he would have loved you to the end. No he feel Yeah Oh. D you really think I think so. ye. I think he'd love to go. Yeah And you discarded him. Amy dragged him to the bin. You disard You want be the m, takeake him out to the bin. Come on mate. I'm so sorry about this Like, it's not you. It's langing on the wall. Jordan, I'm done Be coming out and dealing with him like I do with spiders. Wh Wh he. And it so good if there's a spider. He will come out with his face' old But it's also like the tone of voice. Amy never has to say spider anymore. She just goes, Jordan' march out like that. Where is it? Where is it? Is it a man spider? Get on, get you clothes on, get out comeome on spider. S your clothes on Come on sppider, get you. It's four curats. C my how how manyute's see sppider would wear. Is it four? Is it one with Is?. One with eight? Well, just one with eight arms. Yeah, that makes sense because why would they be wearing human shaped coats? Yes. Yeah.. Were think they're human. don't they don't think like us. No Yeah. Thank God. Thank God, Lucky stars every day that spiders don't think like us G gotta get in there and sniff them I love that you two are living together. I think's so nice. It's great Yeah. And I think it's a really nice dynamic and it's just it feels very calming having Jordan A. Yeah, it's nice. It's a good. Some look at It's a good vy Youager boy. biger boys. I've had my mind changed. I've had to do a one hundred eighty on this man. Can I say one of the sweetest things Overheard was when you were you called your male friend one of your D' don't get Don't get shy He doesn't look good when he gets shed It gone off sh. I don't melt in the chair. you're okay. You're safe here, Jordan. This is our second home, okay? You can't leave the doors' locked, Jordan. You're gonna have to listen to this. He was like, Oh, I'm just gonna to call my friend and was like literally walking out of the living room and I heard him say on the phone, Hello sweet prince Oh sweet is lace. Yeah. They are It's the opposite of Gorgeous friendship Yeah Yeahah, what is that? I don't know. Well, I said hello my sweet prrince, and then when I got in the room I was like Right, I was fucking this bin. I all that no Hello, sweet prrince, let's talk Let's talk Boobies suchuch a great group of male friends. Yeah, I do. Yeah. So nice and the way you are with each other and the care and like you're not like soft boys. Do what mean? Like you're like funny, these are all like big Welsh lads, do what? Yeah. But the care that goes on and the communication between you all is like Oh, it's breathtaking. Oh, that's so nice. Yeah. It's really good. That's really sweet. Yeah. Well because they came up last weekend for my birthday Um and it was I think I think at one point like I said like 'causeuse you went to bed. Yeah. And I was like, the conversation wasn't even different when it was just us in the room. Do you know what I mean? there's no sudden geish If we're going, right, boys, let's get into it.. How the bird Yeah b. Now the fannies f like that. You know You know, I men talk Now the fan is fucked off. Now the fan is fooked off my sweet prins. Yeah, we love each other. We hate women That's what you' want. But how do you think you've managed to cultivate this like ic but not like perform like it' genuinely not performative or like Let's try and be good guys. It's just like a group of good guys. Howd you be a good guy Um please Listen up boys. You've got you've got to be in the arts. Well, I think part of that, I think it partly is because we're in the arts. It's just like, you know, it does attract you know, more sort of emotionally literate people or more self aware people. So I think quite lucky, you know, I think sometimes I think Oh actually men must be having these friendships all over the place but I don't think they are necessarily, I think I think we're quite lucky I've noticed a big change in us over the last slide fifteen years. Like it's been, you know, I've known some of these for fifteen years plus and The journey that we've all gone on has been so beautiful to watch us all you know, all of them are or have at some point been in therapy and sort of worked. And it's not come from a place of like All right, we, you know not feeling obliged to do that stuff. I think it's just like from within going, I've got to sort this out. I've got I've got to deal with this But there's been moments of like, you know, I've always felt close to them. But then the last few years, in particular as we've got older ourur weaknesses have become less disguiseable O our vulnerabilities are more apparent as we sett into who we are as people. and so We've just been more honest with each other and like there's one friend in particular who yeah, the sweet prrintince, the aforementioned sweet prrince who' say his name if he's happy to be known as a sweet prrince. He doesn't want to be associated with this. the chips part. This this messanderest dross. Hey His name's Phil, Phil Cooper. He's also a comedian, but we, you know, we've been close for like, he was actually at my first ever gig and I didn't know him Oh my go. And he came up to me after the gig and he went D donon't see that as your first gig. That was incredible. That was completely lost on the audience. You have to keep going. And it really stayed with me. Oh I didn't Yeah.en supporting.en supporting M. Yeah. So and then we got really close. We lived together briefly in London for a bit. Oh ye who would you prefer living with?? Hm Amy. Can you nip him for me? Yeah. And then over the last few years we just got close and I think there was like genuine moments where we'd like G into a new place in terms of how honest we were willing to be with each other about what we were feeling and it's such a great to feel like there's a safety in that, you know, to be able to, I don't know, just to feel safe in being honest about what's going through your head is so yeah so important but we've had to do it. whilst playing violent video games So so at one point So we'll play we'll play we'll be like o We have to be shooting someone in the head. D we have to play like dughter online. And we're literally, we've literally had like heart toart like really getting into it talking about our flawors or the things we want to work on whilst also trying to snipeper each other from the top of a mountain We're like, Yeahah know, I probably should just get in touch with my dad and work things out Yeah. you found a way like I think maybe more guys would Open up and chat via the medium of whyy do you think they're having so many wars? you know That wouldome shit. Yeah.. Donald Trump's gonna to come out of this Iran war. Very refreshed Wow, I think it's so nice. It is really lovely. I feel very lucky. Yeah. I feel very lucky. I feel very like. safe because I'm not like a bit I don't love male company. I've never like loved the company of a lot of men This is, you know, there's a it's but yeah, as I say, like they're just so emotionally literate and thoughtful and kind and funny and generous, you know, it's not There's no sense of competitiveness. You know, sometometimes you can be in a room, particularly with a bunch of dudes And it's just like It's not like Yesand, it's like nooba. It's like it's like, okay, you're saying that, but I'm going to go no, no, no, no, it's this Yes. No one's doing that. We're all going That's amazing. plus yes. Here's this, you know I think it just makes the world a difference and And even like when they came over for your birthday, It's a room full of comics. which sometimes can be depending on the comics, but particularly because I was the For some of it, like the only Chick Cuse only bird there, Do you know what I mean? we insisted on you referring to yourself there om Room for a bird. She was walking in more masculine than we were shugging p shot onun in. I drk all of you I don't know why that's where the hooters talk It's his birthday whilever But like Yeah, it was like a really generous like funny. There was no like I don't know, it was just lovely. It. It was just It's lovely. lovely boys. Lovely boys. Lovely boys. I mean, boys with stuff to work on. I mean,, you know, not saying that they. Well, one But I think I think it's just about letting go of like trying to be good for someone else, trying to be good for an external validation of what they think is good or what's seen to be good doing what is right for you and yeah, but like we just yeah, we help each other. really It's nice. You help each other with relationships Do you talk about Yeah, we do. Yeah, yeah yeah. But we I mean the way we talk about relationships and the way that we've learned How to approach a relationship and how to conduct ourselves in it, It's just Yeah, it's really it's really yeah, it's really nice. I think it's definitely helped us stay in relationships or work through difficulties in relationships. Stereotyp is that like a man comes back from hanging out with his friends and they're like, o, how's His girlfriend Susan or whatever and they're like, o, I don't know. you know? My dad they broke out like a year ago and they didn't even know because they didn't even brero the subject. Yeah I don't Susan Susan She one that was in the car crash five years ago. She's the one of the wedding. Yeah Did you go to her wedding? Yeah, no, no. Yeah, no, we're pretty we're pretty good with each other in that way Yeah Yeah. I think it was Jamila Damill, that's said. Clang clang on the pod. That was like She found her relationship was enriched by having like really good friendships because then you're not like you're not all that pressure on your partner to be like, you have to be my best friend, someone to put your grand theft daughter with and have sex with and this and that and that, you're like, oh, I've got such a rich Live. Yeah You know, you don't have to put all your expectations onto a romantic partner For sure. I think I think yeah, I think men definitely gravitate more and certainly I've done this where I just put everything on that one partner and you are my best friend, you are my, you know, my world, my everything And it's it's it's it's way too much. It's it's way too much. So I think it's I think it's important to have that outlet with the right with the right kind of gy Say it with me I'm a goddess How was your dating life like when you were younger, like at school in Harriet I was a heartth robber If we're including partners I had up until the age of twelve Yeah, We're not' We're not do. Forget again Yeah move on U How much younger are we talking I don't know it's just funny to think of you. I don't know' teenager Dave loveve me, It's a primary school. J, we gotta move off from primary school. No I'm telling you, I was at the peak. I was at the peak I It was at the peak I peak Year four. I remember in year six overhearing some girls talking about me and one of them said, there's just something different about him. Yeah. I think it's ' you listen. I think it is. Yeah.. Yeah, the bar was even low then in nineteen ninety seven When did you have your first black what you've cl as a proper relationship And it could be in school. L I would say my first relationship was in school. Yeah, I had one, I was dating dating. Dating So when I was about this must be like year three, year four Yeah We're still in primary school. Yeah, yeah, we're still in primary school. Yeah yeah. Don't worry. I know you're thinking, how have we got time to go through his ent' starting there. There's a twelve year gap carry out where we can we just we jump into mid twenties real soon. so don't worry about that I don't if I can talk about this because that's too young. Like I can't imagine how old is that? But I was that age There' somethinghing inappropriate going on do you then? seven or eight? Yeah. thought That's my daughter in three years. I cannot have this conversation It just it feels she's got to have a little. She She's have a boyfriend.. Well I remember so I remember. So this girl Well this is kind on girls school. Oh did you? Right, right, right. I had bear boyfriends in primary school. Fucking hell, I could't move around the country this day easy. Me and Craig Smith used to play marbles together And then he'd come and try and give me a kiss and I'd tap him on the head. Yeah. And I think I'd say nottil we're married. And I was like six. Yeah. No so my first serious relationship was with this was her name When I say Yeahah. years ago. You cannot say your first serious relationship when you're seven. You was childven. You can't say that. I love that. Sord She love me a turn. Jordan, that cannot be a serious relationship. You're seven. I'm sorry. sorry. I'm sorry. We cannot have it That's his only relationship. Laddim Mav it. let the man have it suddenly because top six to come in buers. It doesn't count I'm Yeah, she joined late she joined school like year three, year four. Her name was genuinely Melanie Brown and I And I really took a shine to her like straight awayay. And even like within half an hour of her joining the class, I offered her a lock it. like you know these little things and I was like, do you want to lock it? She was like, no, thank you. And I was like,. No, like Yeah, yeah, with' both pictures of us No they the like hff sweet.azaz year old, this is crazy. Oh perfect. I've got can lock it with your face in already Thats great And then she was like, no, thank you. And then I was like, oh, I've put them in your drawer. you know you get your own little assign draw. I was like I've put them in your draw just in case you need them. Anyway. I know. It still works, the locket. The old locket routine? Yeah U you know, you lock it bought them all. theseese old lockers. And then she just like yeah, fell fell headt over heels. And so then She came round once with us day we did old. ye she fell rollly bowly. into my arms And she came aroundound with her sister Lindsay, her step sister Lindsay, and they brought me sweets and stuff and we were like hanging out. and then I'd say goodbye to them. And I got off with them both I hate this story. I don't hate this story so much. you' se or eight. Yeah. Where Where are you from Mercyide. I can li there with maple. I can't live anywhere be kissing at seven or eight. That's behind the That's crazy. And imagine how fresh their breath would be from the lozengers. Oh a lockerood. Yeah, that's a hotot. That's h look a hot It's like a medly kiss. That's gonna make your eyes war hate this story. This is the worst story in this podcast. I hate it. So then beautiful. So then we were dating she was we were totally in love and then sorry but you kissed her step sister Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it was like a thing Why are you so jealous 'Cause we're keep living together and trying to find a way to be like, I don't live with a man fver. No, it's absolutely fine that He's k really seven, everybody. f That's fine, Howarriet, Don't dig into him I went to their house And they turned on me I kind of but. They started bullying me. and they were like throwing toys at me and stuff in the corner. They really like something just flipped And my mum came to pick me up and I was like sobbing. Oh And what they'd done is just before my mum came, they tied my shoelaces together and to I w I fell over Harriet, you can't laugh at that. Right. I still try to do that someten like it's such a fun move uch a fun move. The Denis the Menace manoeuzre They don't expect it when they're adults. Not. N really water And they're your GP No, I'm sorry, that's a bad Yeahah. that was what a roll of. that was I think that was the first time I fell in love. But I would have these like, yeah, whirlwind you do when you're at primary school. I remember our classes got put together once and I fell in love with this girl called Samantha who was with Aiden from another class. Jordan had a girlfriend Yes, in years three. Jordan is an adult. Yeah.. I've had four But no, the first time I liked properly was like this is a relationship was it sixteen Makes sense So But yeah, it was a bit of a fallow period after that Yeah Do know when I lost my virginity I don't think so of those stors I we need to actually do so Yeah,' double's doubleble. Well,, well Belle Brown and Lindseay I took things a little too far U I was twenty four. twenty four. So there was a bit of a there was there was a big period where I just didn't How did that Be I I mean, would you say that was older? But did you It your friends. your friends. Don't look at because you're making me stressed. I'm trying to be like ask journalistic questions. like And would you say that's a little old And did you experience that? Eer vunity Or do you think that's normal? Do you think that's like fucking men? And are you okay with that about yourself? Some people might say Oh I can hur it. But yeah, how did that feel for you Yeah I mean, the sex was greatve U No, I just wanted to wait. genenuinely, I just wanted to wait. So it was your choice? It was my choice. I I was just waiting until I inell. I don't in I would say I was insecure about being a virgin when I was fifteen.. that is I just wanted to wait until I found someone who wanted to have sex with me. That's for the right the right approach. I'm not saying that's not the right approach. but I would say you definitely hear of people that if they're in their twenties, Oh no. sex they'd maybe become it could become a thing. Oh dude no Tottally joking, it was definitely a thing. It definitely It doesn't make me feel so stressched This is why you don't have dudes on. we can only do it now and again because it's too stressful Yeah, no, it really, it really like yeah, it did a number on me. Yeah that was what I was trying to say. that wasn't a mad thing for me to say. Thank you. No, no. But when I was like Yeah, so I like when I was about sixteen, seventeen, Yeahah, I just like I just was very That's why how do I say this like Not attractive to others. Only to yourself O the YouTube videos that we've been watch. was that age? What age? That was about nineteen, twenty. Because you're so cool Yeah, but you know, at that age It's very much normal. You would have been a heart throb For sure. I've watched some very funny, very sweet, very clever videos that Jordan was doing when he was a teenager. and I was just like, oh my go, I would have killed to have been your friend. You would have been the coolest. Yeah. That's very sweet. That's very nice. I think it's partly like, yeah, my insecurities is I got like really obsessed with the way I look andt like was super like just, you know, constantly in the mirror counting my spots and looking at myself. and yeah, I really like went into a dark place and u But like, you know, it's that age it's just people are cruel and it's difficult. You go to a party and some's for rejecting you or, you know, theres these things there's just like a one of those those things which just happen one too many times growing up Yeah you go, okay, I'm just different. I'm just not I'm just not allowed in I'm not allowed to seat at this particular table. And so I retreated a lot and Yeahes, spent a bit of sort of time Kind of with like maybe a handful of friends, D didnn't really go out, didn't socialize. I didn't go to Union until I was like twenty three And so there was a period where I just wasn't to be fair, I wasn't putting myself in a position where I could meet Apple. So it's partly self inflicted, but yeah I think it's a really helpful thing for you to talk about that because I'm sure there'll be people that are listening that like feel exactly the same. Why do I feel like you're joking Boring movie dren. It's madebe a comedy bookast Jordan. No I' say J. That's such a nice thing to hear. Some people might say that' boring story What say you to that statement? I'm saying that is really nice and I think that especially like you don't hear that as a woman, like you don't hear the male insight like you never ever think that men are thinking about their appearance. Oh they one hundred percent one hundred percent. I think I was like a bit of a sort of extreme case I guess. No, No, I think I think a lot of men yeah, they just don't young men. Picularly young men. There's just no space in your head for it. So a lot of men will feel it but not express it and not say it Yeah. But obviously, you know broadly men's value is not in their looks as much as women. but That doesn't mean that we don't also feel the same thing Oh, you just love a roast, do you of like Teenage boys say compompared to someomeone who's like very I mean, not all teenage girls or whatever, but like I know if I felt insecure, I'm like, I'm going to dye my hair or I ha things you can do as a woman. and me man there's man it's just kind of like, this is it. This is what I'm working with. These young guys now were doing that thing with a hammer on their face. looked at I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. ye, You can hear that in my room, can you?. I' just screaming. Just put the painting on Sorry, mean the walls are screaming man. I don't know I don't know, very sensitive whilast ab board there But like Obviously things are changing a bit now and stuff like that but When we were teenagers, likeike Boys sort of couldn't express ir personalities in their looks other than like what team football shirt they're wearing. Yeah, yeah. It was no like, oh, I'd feel more confident if I wore a bit of makeup or I'd feel more confident with this haircut or like ye. it was like, this is me and this is it. This is it. You don't like it. I've really got fo all else I can do. Yeah. Oh yeah, for sure. Yeah. I remember trying to talk to a friend of It was real you know it was a real thing in my head. I was like, I'm ugly you know and all this stuff. And I remember sitting a friend down the more sensitive male member of my friendship group. sat down at the park and I went I said to her like, manan, I think I'm ugly They saidad I'm not drunk enough to have this conversation And I never mentioned it again. Oh fucking how. Yeah. Yeah, but it became like a thing, you know, you just hear one too many comments, you know, just people would just say stuff. I mean I had Well men it's fine to like make fun of each other. Dude, one hundred percent and iten would never we would never make fun of each other's appearance and No No, but you would make at that age you would men maybe like I would get it from women as well. like, you know, I'd get sort of people It would be less it feel like it wouldn't affect you. Exactly, yeah. I don't know how to say this because we live together, but you're like you're hot. Yeah. If you were sort of like quasi mode feel like Oh b. Is had a real talk. We will have to cut this out. to a please you know what like that it's bffroom They're asking for a curtain between us. . But yeah, I would get a lot of comments like that. but, you know, I mean Yeah, but it's also like, you know, probably I don't know you do it's kids. kids are so reflexively like do you conform to what we've been told is attractive and all this stuff. And but also I will say that like, you know, I had girls definitely fancicy me. I had a girl, you know, I had a girlfriend and stuff, but yeah, I just Th those kinds of comments just really put me into myself and I just really absorbed them. and you know, partly that's just my brain as well. I could easily have maybe another Another kind of brain would have just dismissed them and not taken them on. Yeah and it's something like something that could trigger like an eating disorder or something to one person could not to somebody else. Oh yeah, yeah yeah really stick with you. It's just a thing that is in your head. Do you think that you have prorocess that or that's something that's still like stop looking at me like that because I'm asking serious questions. every time you make me feel so stressed I take you back. to living with Jordan would not be relaxing in anyw way. I would find it very stressful. But do do you feel like that's still something that's like in your head or that you've yeah. Yeah, I still look for evidence of it. I'm an outlier. I think amongst a lot of, you know Most women get most female comics. I know, you know you guys comments. A lot of men don't really, but I think I think if a man comes along who's like, doesn't immediately conform to what. I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, you know. It's probably threatening. Yeah I like to the sort of guy that is a commenter Yeah, an internet commenter And they just want to say something. They just want to say something about anyone who isn't like Exactly like them. Yeah. They will like some comedy, but it will be, you know ' like one y It will be a guy who says offensive things. Yeah. And anyone who's doing anything other than that, whether it be creatively or they're a woman or you know, heaven forbid, they might be brown or something like. they'll instantly be like, I need comment on this. this different to me. It is It quite different me. Hate this It's me is made more differe. I hate this. Disgusting. Okay. R, I didn't say disgusting No that disgusting man. He doesn't take the bins out leeaves his teaspoons in the sink Dust got him out justust don't turn the dishwasher on when it's full. Do you do that? I do. I actually do. He's actually very good. He's actually pretty good good. He's an Android. Yeah. But yeah, no yeah, yeah. definitely yeah, I definitely still sort of carry that a little bit. like T name me the other day went to I got really, you know, I get really obsessed with like Okay, what can I do to my face? sometometimes I and I'm like, can I have that work done or whatever And I went to a Maxilo facial clinic. try, I don't know. I don't know But it it was on Hardley Stre. was like you know, it was like a private clinic. It's a department of a hospital. You know You might like have gastroentrolology or like an osteo kind of thing ilofacial is like facial stuff. Yeah. but it's like a hospital Like it's a hospital level department. And I went and he said guy said never Have I had an appointment with someone who hasn't been referred I literally just made an a prered There's something else I don't know is Well, look at me and went, you've got a very busy brain. ha any Yeah. I think that'sither I really appreciate you talking about because I think so people are just going around their lives and there's some stuff happening, but like you have no idea what's happening in their heads. L it helpful to know what's actually happening in someone's head because I never would have thought that about you at all. But I think it's probably true of any I mean, certainly my male friends, I know they have hang upps and insecurities You know, I think every to remember we need to remember the. We're vulnerable little guys What it gots likeag in the m We're the problem We're the toxic world. Yeah, you said you've been going on for ten years. Men need to go to therapy. We went to therapy. What are you doing Yeah, therapy as well fun. Yeah. I just a load of therapy Gsh It's good to have a male perspective now again, is head is grounded Yeah. What have I offered? What perspective is this? Just that men have feelings too is literally we need to be reminded once a month. We've got to have a another guest every month just to remind us they can On our perodific one though. It has to be the right one, otherwise we can go the other way. A lot of them are awful. Are you like How'd you feel about this is such a big question? And I know we're nearly finished recording time of the podcast. You bare react to Amy with this question the way you did to me.ter I'm getting a look. How do you feel currently about being a man I love it Well So much, jin in. I it of you Absolutely hate that Good Lord. U compomated It's really complicated. I think You get paid more? You get paid more, which is great. I I don't know if it's hard I don't think it's hard to be a man in the way that people think it is now you know these days, I think I think But I do think that a lot of certainly men my age and men in my sort of circle have had to do a lot of assessment, a lot of thinking about things that were just built into us from day one and unpick it. And so But I don't think it's any more or less than what other people have had to go through in their own life. So it's almost like it's kind of just equaled the playing field I think a lot I think a lot of men have struggled with masculinity and what it means to be a man and I think. But I also do think that That is something that everyone is struggling with since the dawn of time, since the beginning of consciousness You know, this idea of sort of men being in crisis I mean, haven't we all? been in crisis since day one. Since day one. Since day one, it just takes on different shapes. There's never like a period in history where you're like, ah, they had its sort. Exactly. Be alive is a crisis. Being alive is a crisis. Yeah I think it's just taken on, you know, yeah, it's just taken on a particularly insidious form at the moment But then when is it not when is it not? Yeah Yeah, we feel like it's maybe you know, like the manus fume and stuff like that. it feels like, oh God, it's escalating and it's getting worse than ever. But I actually think We're hearing about more stuff, but it's probably best it's been. Yeah. and this thing is just it's we just know about it. It just know to happen, isn't it Yeah Yeah Yeah for sure for sure. I do you know, I do worry like that you young men being fed this stuff It scares me. you know, I think if I was that age O one hundred percent I'd be vulnerable to it. One hundred percent I would have ended up like in cell or in cell adjacent with some like toxic views You know Be they target you and when you' when they do they do. You know, And if you've got things in your head about like, oh I don't know if like women find me attractive and they're like, yeah, they wn't find you attractive becausecause women are only like men who have got a millionaires. Yeah and that's why they're all bitches. Yeah and you need to hammer your face and then maybe they're like of course you're like right Of course if you're line in bed, you're vulnerable, you're falling asleep. this stuff' just being you know Yeah. I feel quite lucky to have had like my m and my sister have been such strong presence in in my life and so I do feel lucky to have been like able to be vulnerable quite early in my life and be emotionally, you know like thoughtful and Like I remember like, you know, when I think about the way that my mum and my sister have kept me propped up and helped me even through, you know, we were like kids and having a great time And then suddenly adolescence just hits you. And I turned into a nightmare And they their love for me never wavers You know, they were still there the whole time. I always remember this this one This one time, I was so worried about the way I looked. I was like constantly going on about it. I'm ugly, disgusting all this stuff and And I was working like quite long days rented the Lord of the Rings Fellship of The first one on DVD And I kept falling asleep and I was getting so frustrated because I was like,t I can't believe I'm missing all of thisep. Youan And then I came home once And bought me the DVD and a little note and it was just like, you're a beautiful person. You never need to worry about all this stuff. Yeah, it was like so I was so sweet. but I think about it all the time because it's just such a like so symbolic of the way that they were just like constantly looking out for me and constantly keeping me sort of propped up. So yeah behind every good man is at least two good wom At least too good women. But behind them is like Just a real fucking dude. Real big lad. Real big lad Just a real real big glad just real big So can you tricks it out the away? Jordan, thank you so much. Thank for Thankreci for having me. it's over. Thank Yeah, it's over, it over, over now. We've had enough, than you. We've had enough of that. Thank you. I think I was gonna ask all you your Instagram. I think people are going to be so surprised when they follow you on Instagram and they expecting like some beast oy I love it look ye And what is your Instagram? and can you tell us about your new show, please? It's Jordan Brookss comedy. The new show is it's called The Part of You That's alwaysways Screaming And it's on. I'm doing the show at the Edinburgh frringe in August this year And I'm taking on tour. Sort of tour. I mean, I wouldn't pull a tour. It's a handful of dates in major cities. That's a tour. What a tour is. L it's nothing. It's definitely summer. It is. Jan is very funny. People need to go going Yeah. And if you want, obviously, like Yeah do it Yeah obviously just don't say hes both fun but yeah, just if you don't want to, you don't have to I don't know. It allort goes without say Yeah You do have options. Yeah Yeah you could not go, but you know it is nice. But you should you should go if you want to don't brush.'t rush the time. Don't move anything in your sched. When I saw Jordans show, his previous show in Edinburgh, I think maybe you were there Yeah. I think you were I think so. Yeah when we watched the show it was so good and then and this is before we lived together. L we were like friends, like not super close and I came out and I burst into tears because I was so proud of you And I was like, what's up the? It's just so amazing that I know people that can make stuff this good. But ye She was tired. I was also tired. I just arrived at Edinburgh that day and I think I'd beenat up for like twenty four hours but I was in bits because it was so fun It was so f. Andible thats someone that I know is dumb Yeah. Oh that's really sweet. That's really sweet. You guys got anything needy to plug or? Oh no, we find that quite ghostous Yeah, we would never do that.. I didn't realize you're supposed to say no Thank you, George Is it h Well, that was Jordan Brooks Goodest egg Yeah a good good bloody bloke actually. Good bloke. Good guy. Stressful to interview I will say that was on bothir of you. I had a lovely time It was just it was just yeah, it was very stressful Yeah ask questions but in a fun way it was a fun boy very like twentyenty four And do is that for you do you feel I just say it's a bit older He had no idea what I was talking about. That's why I kept going. Th I was like, Oh, I'm getting g. You got g You got g by the brooks. Yeah. You got g, you got me He's very funny and his shows are so good. His shows are so good. Again, you don't have to go. You do not have to go watch them but if you do want to Edinburgh Finge Festival andntour andntour or Amy's house. Or come round, come round. And of course you can follow him on at Jordan Brooks comedy on Instagram. You'll see some content of him. You'll see me in the background a lot of the time. or you'll see our flat in the background The other day he did a post where he I gave him a wig, I was throwing stuff out. I gave him a wig