Wrapping Up a Busy Half Term

Okay well, that was all that was needlessly fucking stressful. Hello, welcome to the podcast. Hello and welcome to the collollegees and podcast I just spent like fifteen minutes looking for me laptop because I need the laptop to put the SD card in and upload so that you get this you know Tuesday morning. And I couldn't find me a laptop. I'm back from the gym, being going to the gym on the evenings now because of half term So Sophie was already asleep. And so I went on like my phone for like find my location services and because I've done it with AirPods before. I didn't realize I play different noises. so I go on like play the noise for my laptop and was like, because I hunted high and low for it. I was like, I ordered some clothes from Marxies for the holiday about three days ago. Fuck knows where my laptop is after that. So so I pressed it and obviously the laptop, of course it was in the bedroom. so I'm waking Sophie up. so I'm going through trying to put the torch lightight on my phone all the while the laptop is just making this little noise of like a we can look to do to ick a look to took to do W look d dk So then Sophie's like, obviously, you know, she can hear that and I'm fucking about with the torch. So naturally she' responded as if I've trying to murder the whole family. What the hell's going on? I'm just like, I'm just trying to find my fucking laptop. So you know, she's up at that point. so I put the big light on Um, and then You can't just turn the sound off on your phone. You have to like open your laptop up and so then I'm like I'm running it through the house like past all the kids' rooms with they' sleeping to come into the office room. We can look Wick look dook dook d duuck So I'm sorting all that out So yes, so starting starting this in somewhat of an adversarial capacity there I'm all I'm all riilled up now I am. But hello, hello and welcome to the C Hutchinson podcast And I'd like to give a special shout out to the Tat whoever the twat we're going to get look, it's been half term And there's been a few extra days tagged on with inset days and all that. So'm full of hell. I'm going to be full of hell this episode And I mean, I'm sure you would expect nothing less at this point, right? And damn Christ all maybe Special shout out to the Tat Whoever it is in North Tyneside whatever Municipal Yeah, I love that word. Municipal governning body capacity you'll you're be in where whoever you are oldld fuck. I guarantee you're an old fuck Yeah I just want to say a special fuck you to the person who tags on a teacher Inet day. before or after a half term U I mean, I get it like I mean, can they not just fucking have the day off somewhere else? L can they not just I mean, yeah, I guess, you know, I used to be a teacher as well and I used to fucking love them days because it was just an extra piss about day as a teacher. I loved it. And I'm sure you got told something but I have to I can't remember at this point But yeah, it was like so we went around the twist again. Again, man. I've been around the twist twice this week And I'm going to be going tomorrow with Alice as well. shit I need to book that. Got to book it every time. Well actually I say I need to book that. I don't. I don't need to book it because that's what the queue was the day, wasn't it And before I start slagging people off, I want to give a special shout out to There was like a mom who was like staring, not staring. sorry. like she was looking a bit and I was just like, okay either she knows who I am or there's a fucking dead pigeon under me car or something like that. you know what I mean? And you never want to assume, you never want to go over to somebody and be like, this is Dror Frzer Cane. you know what I mean? Like you have to wait for them to say But yees, she came out. We got out the car It was me, Lily and Eva Lily's mate Ava because Lily normally goes to Ava's on a Monday but they've all been on holiday. they got back last night So I said I'll take them to round the twist and D nandoos and then they come back and do some colouring in beforehand before you pick them up So Eva' mom, Kate, Kate and Dne you's got two moms. they've they've I've tried to give them a full free day because it's now worse when you get back from holiday. fucking you've got to look after your kids and get rid of all the holiday fucking evidence. I hate I hate the suitcase lying around the house likeike hanging around the scene of a crime I like to get it like all like sorted in the wash. away suitcase back in the garage wardrobe in the loft wherever I don't want to see any evidence that I've been on holiday once I'm back. so I thought You know, Lily's always going to Aave us on a Monday. now so I'll return the favor So yeah, so had overall day as well, right? And the favor paid dividends as well because kid text see and them Um I'm on your way to Costco. Do you want anything And I was like,, I'm fine. I don what do you put an order in for? I was like, I don't even know where to begin with Costco And then she said I could join you, I could join Costco because I'm a limited company now. Lil Bill limited. believe that was incepted incepted. I believe that was I think it's twenty twenty Yeah, it Well was obviously when Lily was born, wasn't it Because it' named after her Lil Bill. So yeah, the company's getting on five years now. why Why? I got a cross between Wow and Whi And I said, I said, I said, Why? It's like biting into a pull pork you Why? I always bang bang cauliflower, wasn't it? fuck was I talking about So yeah, cost school. Yeah. So then kids said I'll Be sure you don't just want to a big job, a lot of toilet rules. I mean, first of all, what a fucking odd thing to suggest, but What a brilliant practical I think thiss just as well. I was like, I put a stone Put us down for a fucking job, like, so I'm just I can kick it now as I speak to you just No we going to hear that. as just forty forty Kirkland three ply Yeah No that's a table salt C composory table salt, hold on Triple satin, That's not table salt. Oh, imagine table salt, toilet roll. Fucking salt and vinegar toilet roll. Cheese and chive, toilet roll. Now so I've got forty forty toilet rolls now. so yeah, fucking have at it. So it always pears to be nice. You know, I did I did a very selfless act of, you know, I'll take Ava, we'll go to around the twist, we'll go do Nandoos, come back, do some coloring in, do some drawing, do And got a new Bobbie house for Lily. We could play with that. And no, no, u u, you know, it's Why am I saying no? No the Fucking hell c. You can tell it's the end him. I did all of that selflessly and yet I've been rewarded with forty three ply. table sale toilet roll. So I don', you know, u it's it it pays to p I feel like Michael Scott now the practical, practical, My son is home appears to be nice Anyway. A special shout out too because it was Lily and Ava in the car. So then it was the mom looking over and she had messages on Instagram afterwards. Ashley Turner. I want to say, it was a pleasure to meet you and your son Owen and I hope you' enjoyed aroundound the twwist as much as we did and curarerently She wanted a photo with me to make my mate jealous because I mate's like even bigger fan. So I said I'll give a special shout out to Judith Dixon Apparently I read out One of our emails recently as well. so That's news to me I'm sure you're aware This is I don't know what this started as this podcast, but it is just now it is me talking for half an hour and then I upload it and I don't think of it ever again. So it's so mad now because people come up and they're like talking I was like And what's that? the fook do you know? Oh, yeah, the podcast. Yes, yes, yes, of course of course So yeah, special shout out to Judith Dixon, who I believe is also a patron as well. So it's nice Nightice when people there are nicy and all that, isn't it? So Yeah, but a special shout out around the twist as well for the people who didn't book around the twist because I always get told And, you know, book Save time U but so I booked and I saved time. but the You know what? let's just get how long have I been doing this for We're about nine minutes in I'm just going to see I'm just going to start saying the C word Hunt who didn't book And then hold up the rest of the ceue Well, you have to give your number, your name. d of birth signed the waivers and all thatllics Absolute twats, probably old old twats. You can tell it grandparents as well. I'm going to slag off grandparents as well because you I'm fucking sick of this half term, right? as well. You cannot go anywhere now. without there being a massive bigQ But if you want to get the kids an ice cream, if you want to get them a juice There's always a massive quue and what is the massive quue? What is it? Do you know what it is? It's Kunnt. ordering coffees I'm fucking sick of people ordering coffees. If you order coffee in public, you're a fucking twat. I hate you so much. Just have a coffee in the morning. twow maximum in the morning. and after that, you know what? you're probably better off having a bottle of water worst case scenario go get an energy drink. donon't order how how fucking dare you order something that takes two and a half minutes to make because that is a cumulative effect on every so the reason honestly, man, its we've been going to national Tust parks, we've been going to various soft players, we've been going here there and everywhere and we've sorted taking pack lunches everywhere pack lunch everywhere We'll take our own juice bowl and everything. It's so weird, you know, it's full circle for me When I was like younger, be taking that type of stuff. you know, I didn't have kids when I was younger, but you know if it was something like that, would I would sort myself out. I would take something because I was always frightened of how much Somet would cost And you know, luckily, you know, very fortunately because people buy. I don't have to worry so much about that now, but now it's the time. I don't I don't have the fucking time So cruel, isn't it I dont I don't have the time to ceue for fucking eight minutes for a juice Be three kunts won a fucking cappuccino at twenty past twelve in the afternoon. the fuck's wrong with you fucking cream all whipped up as well. I'd love the everyone who does that, I'd love the Skaldiies, you know that? I'd love the fucking S skaldiies and you' run away go Wh? Wh I go because you fucking order the coffee, you selfish, selfish prick. Oh, God, M And then Oh yeah, I'll tell you that the reason why that annoyysed us so much is because Lily and Ava wanted to go on the the G cots Right The little doudgeums that around the twist the cost like one hundred fifty ago, right? So would already been the round the twist a couple of days previous and Lily was great on it. So I was sat on the car and I was pedaling but Lily was driving. But obviously he was so busy the day with the teacher inset day. I had to queue Eight minutes while Lill and Ava was supposed to be playing, but they didn't they just kept running over to me can trying to get me to play with them, which I was really looking forward to doing, but I couldn't because I had to wait for eight minutes while three What Honestly, just just Hunt U sorry I've said that a lot already. I know I know most people hopefully listen to this with headphones in, etcetera ordering coffees. I had to wait eight minutes so I could go to the one last at the canteen Gutted in fairness like she would be teacher inset day and she was like nobody had told around the twists. so who was just fucking one member of staff because you normally have to go there and then you go Can I get somebody to come and, you know key for the doodgeums or the Gulcartts or whatever But I went, Wh do I speak to about She was like, Oh, they're not on the day I'm just by myself, sorry I like, Ohh no worries, yeah. I would have loved to have just asked that, but no I had to wait for a booking chinos and all kinds of Bonics Fucking grow up, man, really you? The hell are you doing Cook, haveave a full fat cook. Have an energy drink? Have something that doesn't take two and a half minutes Slfish, selfish pricks Ad a full fat cook add three full fat cooks in Nandoos took the kids to air But yeah, anyway Ashley, it was nice meeting you and all the best of your friend, Judith. But then I went to took the kids to Nando's at Kingston Park Yeah. And then You know, they didn't really eat much. They had the chips and the cucumber. They were a bit frightened with the chicken burger. Lily said it was spicy. it wasn't spicy. I got the play and I checked it as well Um, but you know on the on the and then that put Ava off. so she didn't have her chicken burgers burger Eat your multiple chicken burgers and then And then we I saw the menu and it said fucking M It normally just is bottomless corer. But this time it said like a glass of Coca Cola and then there was like writing underneath sing. And if one glass isn't quench of thirst, feel free to get refills on our suugarless drinks So's you can have one full fat cork but you can you can do the bottom less something. I was like, fuck that. So I was like, do they just bring a um A glass of coke over de, but it wass like, no, they just bring the glass. They just trust you not to keep getting full fat cokes, but I'm not fucking doing that. Chr. It was like it was like four pounds something. I was like, I'm not no. like so yeah, so Nando's Kings's Park. I had I had three three full fat I'm sure you can afford it. I had three full fat cokes God, if ten years ago Cl could hear me now when I had that Nando' black card, Bloody hill Yeah, I still don't know how I ended up getting one of that. Well, I know it's because Ramseay had one and then they saw me at like one of his gigs And then they, you know, before I knew us, I was meeting them I I remember the last called Alice and I'm weirdly and I met in a pub upstairs in Liverpool train station because I was doing hot water comedy club. I remember I turned up just like waving the black card just say, Yep. I think from now on everything's going be al right And then after a year they didn't renew it. and that was the end of that chapter. But it was a good Oh, I was a good running out that Nando's black card, Chrace I used to Yeah, they just give us it and then they were like, you know just every time you have a Nando's, tweet about it. It's how long ago it was. Wow So yeah, I was tweeting Ferandoos probably about five times a week really. This is back when we had Nicks as well. Oh this is nice. I can tell you this story without getting all choked up but we I used to get the I used to get Hernandoos for Nicks. I just used to get I used to get like a little plain a plain chicken and then I would just like take it all off the bone and that and I rem I used to give out a little bit and she just I remember she was just like it got to the point where she just recognized the bag. Oh God, sorry, I said I would do without yoga and then u Yeah, she would just get all excited. It' when we just lived in the high terrace flat where it was just like you know a little one bedroom flat downstairs And you to come back with theernandoos and you could hear a purring while she was eating the Nando's chicken. It wass just like and then got so silly I got to the point where I would get an extra dessert. And I would give Nicks the the little tub of cream Every now and then she would probably she would fucking buzzing with it like a guy Oh go you had a good life with us, you know becausecauseuse she was like she she When she came into the house, she was like Everyone was saying that she was just like a street cat, like she just she's got a family, but she doesn't like them and she's just she's never in the house and the family We had three kids in fairness you now. so I totally get that now And she used to be called Willow. Yeah, and I remember we put like a load of fllyers out around the street saying, you know, we've got a catch justs chilling with us every day You know, if you wantna back, please let we know and then the guy in touch saying, Oh no like she's calledld Willow And she's just We didn't even think it was our cat because you said in the description very friendly and she's never friendly with us And then, um, Yeah they just said, would you like her? And so I I was like, Yeahah, great. So we had to Yeah, had her for about eight or nine years. Ciny little thing So yeah, so u the the Nandoos. Yeahes. so Nicks Nicks did love love and Nandooss a. Hey, I mean that's not bad. I made that It's nice, that's progress That's time, isn't it? Time just healing all wounds Tal, hopefully I can start telling some more stories about her now. ' yeah' doesn't upset us as much. Oh it does, but you know, kind of done all me crying about it. Hey, I'll regroup and I'll come back and I'll tell you as all about what's been going on the rest of the half t So I mean, first of all, throwing a bloody heat wave into the equation as well. He had a heat wave half term. My goodness, honestly. And Ramseay's been away O a family holiday I've not even had Ramseayy in the morning. I mean, normally we don't chat at half term anyway It's noormally the last Friday before the schools break up and we'll talk on the Friday morning and just like right over and out, speak to you in about nine days time something like that. You went Yep, have a good one. just because we both realize how busy we are with kids and everything And then yeah, check in. we always do like a little Monday morning, check in when the kids are back to school. So I look forward to that tomorrow actually as well and it won't be Monday, but you know M and then Why was I telling you about that? I haven't even had Ramseay in the morning to speak to, but he's been on holiday. so I've been leaving him voice notes of like Do you know like dont consider to be really shit, Pata? if you have friends on holiday The weather's nice like at home and then it's like don't people always text or go like Yard why Hey what are you doing going on holay and the weather's great, yeam. You went on holy at the wrong time, didn't you? we weather's good. Yeahah, just but you wasted a fortune there because the weather' fucking shit, Pat I and the that's the sound of them like like picking the mouth back up because it's so fucking fat and stupid can't even hold their mouth without slavering all over themselves So they can say this fucking shit inane Trite comment the thing they're the first person that's ever said it. That's it. I h I hear when people say a stuff and they think they're the first person that's ever said it Like anyone who's his prime onie, I'd love to cut the tongue out of the mouth. I don't know why are you I don't know why you going on hold of you ' well that's nice ye you didn't have to go all that wayird or it just like blitty spit. Yeah should have m on you born cnt You can go over there and order a coffee and pour it all over yourself because that's all you deserve out of your life Some people say this is like therapeutic as well. like I think sometimes I'm Mbe's borderline psychic but, you know, if you're enjoying it, great So yeah, it's last Saturday got off stage Glasgow, Park carar where Ray Bradhaw tools the park right next to the And it's the H andM, H and M, HM passport revenue in Glasgow. So I can get straight off stage and drive drive home and then there Yeah got up Sunday. So Sunday, the beginning of Hoftn we took the kids to Tymouth Beach. Again I remember shout out to Kelly Weemams. So Kelly so weems, love, love a bit of Weems. didnn't have a chance to say her too much because obviously you know we're busy with the kids and all that, but she was just hanging outside of there I believe Tim of Castle Hotel with either a ral of our mate or whver So's great to see you And. Yeah, they took the kids to the beach and then like I remember the kids got covered in sound because I had them like I was both of them because Sophie said, I'm going to go get myself a beer. I was like, go on, well, I've got the call, I' a shandy and she took about fifteen minutes because on a blazing hot day on a Sunday, heat wave talking maybe' one, two in the afternoon Crettens, absolute Cttens ordering coffee at that that little shack thing. I can't remember what it's called now. It's really nice we go all the time, but yeah, honestly just just I can't Well,'m I think the point is redundant now. but so again, delayed because of coffee' there. So come back kids are full of sand. Cars ends up full of sand. Kids fall asleep, takeake them back We've said at this point I made Tamon come round Tamson and Fe. So we'll get the bouncy castle out, get me money's worth out of that one. I must told you that story, right? The bouountncy castle it cost is about three hundred fifty quid or whatever it was. Once you get the bouncy castle and then the pump And the the balls to go in it I tell you how that came about because was it was an Easter Monday, I believe, and was it was like a bank holiday and I was on Facebook and it popped up, Do you want to buy this thing for like thirty quid? And it was like Wfare. It made it look like it was a Wfare website. So I went paid it, paid a thirty id, get a little email saying Yeah, we've acknowledged your order. We'll let you know when it's done. It was like, you know the wording of it, or there was a spelling mistake in it and I was just like, oh shit. I was like Kettle tollers because I tried to send the link to Kettle. he was like, are you being stam scammed man your stupid twit So then had the ring it SBC, you know the money back, do all that fucking thing And then At that point I'd already said to Lily, Hey, who wants a bountcy castle? Me me, me me. So I was, you know, soft as cloths. I was like, o, well it looks like I'm paying full price for that bountcy castle now so I've had to go on Amazon and get it. So I got that Tamson came round, fake came round. It was the dad Glen as well. He had he had two beers blless him. he wasn't He wasn't a big drinker U and then so I I I had more than two and then when he left and the kids left and the kids went to bed. me so I did we had a little drink there because obviously I've been away Friday, Saturday and so So we said to ourselves, we're not going to drink all half term because we've got what do you call it? we've got the holiday coming up and all that. So Monday we' drive to Cragside National Park our national Tust. I keep calling the National Park L it's America. That was great, fantastic. Twat ordering coffee but' thought ahead and would took a pack lunch and everything like that. And then Kettle and Ema text saiding you want to come aroundound for a barbecue later on? So Ketle before you know it we're having drinks there so this just were're drank Monday night as soon as we said, we were wndering. But we got on it on Tuesday We said fromom Tuesday, you know, we're not going to We're not going to do it anymore we didn't inairness and I swapped G having like about six or seven drinks to go to the gym on the evening as well And I tell you I've been being pin five pounded The T I'm already a member of Newfield. Ill pay sixty one pound the for the monthly membership, right? But I've been paying a fiver here and there because my membership is off peak Right? It stops. I can't get in after five o'clock on a weekday because I remember it was from ten years ago and I remember saying like when will I ever need to go to the gym past five o'clock? ten years later, you've got two kids. It's the only time you get So I've been paying this fiver And then it was the manager other day Howard and he was like I was like, Hi, I just need to pay a fiver to come in. And he's like, what? He's like, No, you can't do that. Like no, like honestly, he was acting as if I've fucking broken into the gym. I've been and to for the last ten years and been paying a fiver additionally he's been he acted as if I'd fucking just went in there, punched him in the face and began to steal exercise. like No, no, no, you can't do that Oh, no, no. I can't believe you've been doing that. No., Well, I've been paying a five. I've not been doing it for free. So I'm doing he wass like, I'll let you in this time, like doing us a favor. I mean, I guess he is, so thank you. And I'm doing weights upstairs and I was like, how much is it to go off? It was only an extra fucking tenor So instead of p being sixty one, I was like, I went downstage. I went, canan I just upgrade the seventy one pound? Yeah I've been paying that anyway. Christ. And he was like, ye, yeah, you can do that. I was like, right okay. And then he as was a bit of a jobsworth about it because he gave us a form and he was like, and that starts the first of July Be obviously today is the first of June, you was say, Well we can't do it this month because the direct debit' already been collected I is there any chance I could just come in tomorrow He's like, I'll put I'll put your name on the system. And I was just like he was a proper fucking computer to sayays no about it like so so that wound us up. But then I realized, you know, it's its if the rules are the rules, fine Fine Like I'm not going'm not going to bang on too much about it. But yeah it was a bit annoying. It was very annoying It was like, oh, no, no, no, compputer s is not allowed to do that. Anyway, Tuesday, Marine Park, South Shields with me, mom and dad, Nana and grandad. I've got both kids because Sophie's working. so went went on the train. I was really shock with me mom and dad actually like I sent them in apology text and I rang them and all that because it's just being full on, you know, getting up and like every Alice has been teethhing. so it's just she cries constantly nonstop and then like and then Lily's just like dad, dad, dad, I want to start I can't leave a site without asking something of us. So like by the time I arrive like ten in the morning, I'm just like fuck and I've been up since five. I'm just like fucking hell So I think I What did I do like guy? My mom was letting Lily play in the bush and she came out holding the bird's feather And she was like, she was proper like Lily had a fingers on. I was like, putut the feather down. likeike you know do't know what diseases birds carry and all that. And I was like, Mom, what you doing? letting her? And then mead. I mean, this is would be funny if it wasn't so pathetic. I was so like, you know, you just don't want to talk to anybody. like but you can't, you know what I mean? It's your mom and dad,' two kids. I just didn't want to fucking say a word. There was one moment when both kids were just quiet and not doing anything and just eating the lunch. but I went to the Minceellas and got the kids packed lunch, got the kids like a little sandwich boxing. Again, Tat order and coffes So I'm full of hell with that as well And then the kids didn Lily didn't want a last sandwich. so they give us some coleslaw in the box as well. It was like you get the sandw, the coleslaw in the salad. So with like two sllices of bread, I just scooped up a bit of coleslaw and there was some crisps that on the bench. that hadn't been eaten. I just put them in the sandwich. I was like,y, this'll be me breakfast or lunch or whatever the fucking hell it is Just as I put me mouth put the food in me mouth, my dad just went like Bless him. he was just trying to talk He was You's like, o so we' in Glasgow this weekend And I looked at him like, you've just seen me put the sandwich in my mouth to be a dick, I just spat it out. I was went, Yeah,ah, I was I was like, What do you do that for? I was like, Why do you fucking toyos when I've just put a sandwich in my mouth? fucking. I was just in a foul mood And that's when you know it's your mom and dad because you know, I apologize to them both afterwards Like once I'd been there for hour was like, hey sorry I'm full of hell, you know. like, it's all right, man'm just, you know, we worried about you just don't be working too hard you know You're gonna to give yourself a heart attack and all that. I was like, I know, sorry, like I love you. loveove you mom and dad. J sometimes you don't have a great day, which I didn't, I wasn't having on the Tuesday. But the kids went on the train around Marine Park. they loved that. Well, Alice didn't love it. Lillily went on twice. She went on once with me once with me dad And then Wednesday was had activities planned every single day. Wednesday was aroundound the twist for the first time, twow of the little Littlest shits I've ever had the misfortune of there were these just two I'm just gonna say it, fat little shit, just fat little shit boys Just like both of them had glasses and they were just running around. It was just me and Lily having a lovely time. It was really quiet. These two kids just like just There could be no more than like eight and six. And I' just going there' fucking shit, fucking shit, fucking bullshit, fucking shit, like just shouting like that the top of the lungs. And I I was like, right, where the fucking hell is this dad? Like I want to I want to fucking G if if That dad was there. I would have either been beaten up for what I said to him or I would have got arrested. would If I won the fight, I would have got arrested. If I lost it I would have been in hospital. I wanted to go over and I just want to say you should be absolutely ashamed of yourself. the hell are you doing calling yourself a parent Rising them to fat little shit. But I didn't. it was a mom. You can't say that to a mom because the mom looked like it was like the mom like if I could if I could channel the mom, she would have just looked at me went, I know, I know I'm s like she just looked defeated, crest fallen, like sleep deprived, gutted. And I was like, I can't fucking go over and add anything to that. you know what I mean? So I just had to had to leave it. had to be the bigger person and not. I wanted to kill them two boys, so I really did honestly. I wanted to fucking Get at the top of the sline fucking launch and b off fat little shit Fat little phomo shit. Horrible. honestly. I I all week I've fantasized about like running them over because I saw them at at the car park then I wanted just fucking back up and there. but but you can't you can't, You just got you've got to take the high road call and not murder two children So yeah, so that was Wednesday and then Thursday took Lily to that was quite an easy one actually. We took out a bun on the estate and then went to the park, went for a meal at Babucho because Sophie was off work. they always take ag it's nice food and I like it there, but they always take fucking ages to to. initiate the order. They'll sit you down and then they don't come over for like another ten minutes to take your drinks order. And that ten minutes I'm like I'm like sehing, I'm like noticeably Annoyed And Sophie's always like, why why you? Why are you going on like that? You got got you spoil everything all the time. You gott to spoil everything. I was like, no, I would just like someone to take me fucking order. So I've got to sit there and try not to spoil it with like this this fake pllastic smile Let me feel this is nice, isn't it? This is nice sitting on an empty table like a couple of fucking idiots Anyway, Lily was there. She made a pizza and all that. That was lovely Th don't have to take l to gymnastics where So cool, you know, I'm booking the the fine wine to. I'm still adding like more and more dates to it, right? And it's like ten years ago, I would do it like, you know while I'm watching the TV or while I'm on a train coming back from a gig, Mbe I've got a beer because it's a Sunday and I've got nowhere to be on the Sunday. I don't have to drive to a soft player when I get home And now I'm like pooking the two frantically in between lilies Lily's takaking turns of forward rolls. So I'll watch her do a forward roll, give her a clap. and then I'm like finalizing a deal like going like, well, you know, instead of seventy five, twenty five can we do eighty twenty And maybe we could do the ticket price at this. Yeahah, well done. It was a nice little moment of just scening where me You know, wait where me whereere my life S God. it was lush. God, Friday was him Tynemouth Jungle Park when I took Lily back up to Tynmouth because Alice is at nursery Thursday, Friday, Saturday was just a day I think we earned a day in the garden, didn't we? So Saturday was just the chill day Sunday Gibbside again took a pack lunch and then today Monday aroundound the twist. And I'll be going again to around the twist tomorrow with Alice. So But but Thursday. is the golf holiday where I don't play golf. I'm just gonna to sit beer by the pool for three days. I might try and go for a swim in the indoor pool every morning before I start the drinks. I'll let you know how that gets on this time next week. Thank you all very very much for listening. I hope you have a lovely week. Sorry, I was it was a it was an extra sweary one the day so you know, but you know, it's been half term so