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The Daily Show: Ears Edition

Comedy Central

JD Vance Press Tour and Iran Deal

From This Week's News | Jon on Knicks Win vs. UFC Fight, Klepper on JD Vance's Book Tour & NY Knicks ParadeJun 20, 2026

Excerpt from The Daily Show: Ears Edition

This Week's News | Jon on Knicks Win vs. UFC Fight, Klepper on JD Vance's Book Tour & NY Knicks ParadeJun 20, 2026 — starts at 0:00

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He just tastes better Match days deserve Pepsi. Food deserves Pepsi. Grab a pack of Pepsi Zero suugar for today's match Poetry in motion You're listening to comomedy Central. First things first How was your weekend Did you do like I did and have an Iran negotiations watch party Fire. You know, for a while, it felt like the Iran warar was slipping away from us justust felt like every negotiation, we just had too big a petroleum deficit to overcome. But for those of us who believed, enough to stick it out, Saturday night Out of nowhere was the moment we've been waiting for President Trump says the U.S. and Iran have reached an agreement to negotiate an end the war. I cannot believe how invested our country is in freeing maritime shipping lanes Give Donald Trumpred, inherited a mess. President Obama made a deal, the Iran nuclear deal, which was a terrible deal, That horrible, stupid deal where President Obama paid one hundred fifty billion dollars for nothing. So they tried to bribe them to make a deal and that didn't work. It never works. Exactly Thank you, sir I Kind of a f idiot would try and dangle billions of dollars in exchange for a deal with Irq We are learning more details right now about the agreement to end the war with Iran. U.S. officials did mention that in addition to sanctions relief and the unfreezing of Iranian funds, there could be something like a three hundred billion dollars fund to help rebuild Iran Yess, it's that kind of f idiot There you have it, f Only the great Donald Trump could fight a costly war to get the United States to remove the sanctions put on Iran by Donald Trump In the words of the Great Winston Churchill you played yourself But the important thing is we're going to focus the entirety of the show today on the complexity of what a new nuclear enrichment inspection regime will look like for the hardliners that are now in. I'm with an all time. This whole show I've just been You know what we're gonna talk about? on Saturday night, this free pro from OG A Noie A ninety four ninety victory by new New York Kigabogers, ending fifty three years of basketball futility. and the people responded with the appropriate level of chill You you ever be sitting at home and you're watching this kind of footage and you wonder to yourself, Wh are these people out in the streets of New York losing their minds Well, funny story The little guy on top of that other guy's shoulders He works here Oh I came across our feet and we were like, what the fuck? That's one of our writers, mister Scott Herkman. Scott curity. Was that you in that video? Shott? Yeah a random question. Why are you still on the shoulders? I'm very superstitious, so I'm up here till next year's finals. Let's go G out of here. Sott you guys Sot sit on now. Get out of here. Give me that jersey. Let go, G out of here F the It was an incredible night. All across the city, everyone was out celebrating. They were in the streets. They were in the subways. We had drum lines. We had bagpipes, We had fireworks, bagpiipes. and we had an MTA bus driver breaking it down. MTA, more like MT Say By the way, I love how the bus driver gave back the liquor bottle they handed him. like no seriously, I do have to drive, I am, in fact, a professional bus driver who works It was such a special night. The Kick's Victory brought out appearances by the entire NYCU. There was Spider Man, and there was also Spider Man. And then there was of course, Spider Man. And oh no, Spider Man. And then S And of course, back to Spider Man. Amazing. We chance. Finally, it's been Fava. Who gave Spider Man the microphone By the way, I wonder if when those spider men saw each other, you if there was any confusion about which one was I wonder if they were All right. I'm back hing out there. All right And then just when you thought it was over NYCU brought out a post credit cuts scene of the Hulk ree. Hulk bet spurs in six That teswailing on anybody But you know what's crazy? If that guy throwing them haymakers had been Wemby, the reps wouldn't have called it a b. They would not They were to let it go Hes could have been throwing those,, how can you expect him to control his movement to arms are so long? How can he not trip people? He's one hundred and twelve feet tall Would you call a foul on the Empire State Building? No, you wouldn't. And by the way, New York is so awesome that even the people here that aren't superheroes were suddenly superheroes. It's like the whole city had been bitten by a radioactive spider My favorite though, was this guy casually parkouring across a light fixture to go from one end of the bus to the other. That's badass because I don't know if you know this on those buses, perfectly passable aisle I just walked down the aisle And ladies and gentlemen, while I am not technically in light post scaling shape. I did attend the festivities. My friend, Mr. Roberts Michel, one of his sons, my son, my wife, down in the village, outdoor watch party, pretty cool, and I handled it. I was pretty pretty cool Oh my God C you share it to me? I thought I was filming the game and I just don't know how to work my phone. Oh God! It' really sound like I just got a perfect colonoscopy report. Oh my God. Not a polyp in sight There was truly no place I would have rather been than write on the streets of New York and shout out to the unsung MVPs of the night, the people who had the genius idea to go out on their fire escapes and project the game onto the sides of building. no matter where you were, the game was on from Central Park, to those phone charging kiosks to atop the head of this one kindly g It was amazing Four hours No one had the heart to tell them, you have to plug it in O are always MVPs who keep this city safe and clean for the rest of us to enjoy. New York's finest, New York's bravest and New York's definitely strongest the sanitation department. And also these two guys who clearly thought this is our chance to do our part and help out the city. And get rid of a body T shirt bros aren't out on the city at five AM throwing garbage bags into a truck unless they really need to get rid of shit I left the city at three AM. it was a bit of a mess. By eight AM, it's like the night never happened because they had to get ready for the Puerto Rican Day parade, the World Cup and Pride. Shit cray here, and they did it unbelievably well and beautifully. The point is this whole moment really showed the joy and beauty of life in this big city. I have to tell you, I was so proud G I'll be honest you, I don't think there's anyone out there who could look at those celebrations and see anything other than America at its best. Celebrations turning into full blown chaos, mayhem in Manhattan. Unruly troublemakers, one person was shot, four injured in slashings or stabbings, and five police cars were badly damaged. U on a Saturday night I think that might be a record low trying to do I get what they're trying to do. They're focusing on the bad stuff. to portray that the prevailing emotion and behavior in New York City on that Saturday night was one of chaos and barbarity. But I was there. You're lying. It wasn't. It was an overwhelming sense of joy and solidarity and diversity and community and a good amount of crying and a lot of contact high. And we are just so sorry, right wing media that we in New York City couldn't live up to your definition of a peaceful gathering . Now that ty of behav in proble, although it' be fair to that mob, you know, they lost. anger justifiable. But I guess it's all about what side of the aisle you sit on, where you see a mob destroying a school bus I see people of all faiths and creeds and colors and sexualities coming together to destroy a school busos It ain't a melting pot until you let that bitch on fire. So, right wing media, you cannot tear us apart Our mayor is Muslim, ourur Bagels are Jewish, our Timoth is shalimet Nixson five Honestly, look, man, something shit happened that wasn't great. The night was marred by some violence. I mean, what would you guys on the right rather be watching? The White House is getting ready to rumble with UFC. very excited to see this. Epic, epic day. Hey Isn't that awesome? Bight night. I'm actually personally looking forward to it. Very, very much. I have a ticket plus one, my brother. G gotta tell you, I'm pumped. I feel like my life is gonna change this weekend Is that guy trying to f his brother? What I dont know' going on T my brand We're probably gonna to be holding on we I know what's going to happen So, you didn't care for New York's joyful night marred by a small amount of violence because it wasn't focused enough on the violence part Yes, Sunday Night gave the president and his accolytes an opportunity to rebut the joyous communion of teamwork that embodied the New York Knickerbockers for a joyless, Vegas style trudge through the people's house now transformed into a gold plated pummeling center where the gladiator's God was praised for his foreboement Barents and of course nutsacks. Shut at the truck for having the balls to put some shit like this on. And if you were at home watching this, thinking to yourself Is this a parody Are they filming idiocracy Next thing you know, they will be branding the cutaways to our country's commander in chief. I gott to thank President Trump for making this happen. This is unbelievable. It takes such a special person to be able to have the balls to do something like this. And I have so much respect for him Monster energy drink Is that really cool? Are we now just taunting the old man? Pretty late night, mister President, getting sleepy. Got an early negotiation in the morning Bet you're not mad enough to throw down a red white and blue raspberry snzzler Snazz of your tankt off.. What a god awful mockery of an event that somehow managed to find a way to devalue both combat sports and our national dignity. Who even aired this embarrassing shit? The event aired on Paramount Plus. And what a fine event it was once again, the leaders of Paramount Plus, providing us all with incredible content at Reasonable prices I am proud to stand with the Paramount family and whatever shows they decide to either cancel or put on. And lastly Michelle Obama is a man. Am I right, America? My God, what a fking asshole You know what? just A I look forward to his performance on next week's comics Unleashed. I'll let myself out. And by the way, if you thought this entire spectacle was inappropriate for something that takes place in the peripheral vision of Lincoln, Well, that's you problem. somethinghing that middle America, the average American could connect with. It's coming back to a sense of like, we don't need the snobby elites anymore pretending they're too good for us. Yeah, you know, the average American, they don't want their White House to stand for certain morals and values. The regular people in this country want their president to live in a slightly more violent hooters or a slightly less violent waffle house But somehow those of us who live in the shitole parts of the country are the ones looking down on you They'll probably be having like a Pride show or something for two hundred fiftieth with you know how naked men Did you even watch Did you w So We're tired of this. You guys always trying to draw a distinction between the real America of the heartland and the elites in the big city, but it's never been true Being a real American means sacrificing and working your ass off to try and to achieve the dream of a better life for your children? No Americans are more real than New Yorkers. None of them. We have eight and a half million people here They're prim more hard working American value individuals in the liberal hellhole of New York City than exist in the entire states of Wyoming, Idaho, and Mississippi combined. And yes, maybe two to three percent of those people are spider men, but still. Most New Yorkers don't go to the Met Gala. and trust me, there are elites in the heartland too. I know for a fact, Tulsa is ruled by kings New York's a hard place to live, man. It's a hard city to live in There's a hundred different nationalities in a two block radius. ten pounds of people in a five pound bag. And it's one of those bags that people should really use to clean up after their dogs, but they don't, they sometimes don't But that's why weekends like the one we just had are all the more magical where you feel the joy and striving and hope and let's face it, aroma of the people that you live really too close to. The real division in America isn't between cities and rural areas or suburbs or heartland values and coastal elites or liberals and conservatives It's between people anywhere who find joy in community versus those who seem to only find it in feilty And I know which America I want to occasionally step and dog shit in. You know, summer's just around the corner, which means warmer temperatures, trips to the pool and golf course, Father's Day on june twenty first, and grilling out in the backyard Dad doesn't want another tie or watch. He wants the tender, juicy taste of his favorite steak grilled to perfection So this Father's Day, give your grillmaster something the whole family will enjoy. The finest proteins from Omaha Steaks Every steak and entree is flash frozen and vacuum sealed at the moment of carving. So no matter when your dad enjoys his meal, it will taste as fresh as the day it was carved When you order from Omaha steaks, your satisfaction is always guaranteed. So you can order with complete confidence The gift from Omaha Steakakes is something the whole family can indulge in to celebrate the holiday. This Father's Day give the dads in your life something to savor. World famous Omaha Steaks Visit omahaakes dot com and get an extra thirty five dollars off with promo code yum at checkout. That's omahaes dot com and an extra thirty five dollars off with promo code yum at cheheckout. Terms apply. S site for details Yesterday, Donald Trump touched down in France for the G seven suummit, a forum where world leaders meet to discuss a book they all read This monud's pick was fame sick, a really nice choice Now the summit is being held in the city of Evon, which costs twice as much as a normal city for no reason at all I mean, wouldould it kill you to hold this conference in the village of Kirkland's Signature? come on But regardless, Trump's been having a blast. President Emmanuel Macron welcomed him in what seemed like a very special edition of the Golden Bachelor. Don't make me think. Cannot wait to get into the hot tub with this little number Now, Trump's goal at the summit is to work with our allies and strengthen America's standing in the world with you. He's there for the presence. The German Chancellor offering President Trump a customized German football jersey You can tell he really loves it, you know? Wow, a size medium shirt. Yeahah, thanks You know, Cutter got me a plane, right Although if the Germans insist on giving Trump one of their uniforms This probably is the best case scenario J just thinking to throw him. He's into those heritage editions. That's not to say President Trump showed up to the G seven empty bruise handed. No. Because he had his own gift for Europe, a peace deal with Iran that he just signed two days before Or did he The president and the vice president signed this agreement electronically forty eight hours ago. Well well well. an electronic signature, huh Looks like the autopen R has become the autopen E Gotem. Gotem. Take that. Yeah Cress Seriously, is the Docu signed peace agreement even legally binding There's something disqualifying about a treaty that was signed in an open tab next to pornhu dr in there. Now, so far, Trump is keeping the details of the deal hidden, but it doesn't matter, because the leaders in the region, like the president of the UAE, are just happy for peace. Without your support, you're committ to mr President Not my country, O but The Middle East will be in a different part of the world. situation today. Wow How moving I assume it was a A Little hard to hear him. But I'm sure his demeanor of gratitude and humility is what resonated with President Trump. Well, love it. than you, my friend See, when you're that rich, you can speak that lone I was was wondering can anybody hear that? But when you're so rich, you have such confidence that you don't have to do any strain to the voice. It's great. Wow This broken man just had his whole country droned and Trump is like, Hey, check out the president of ASMR over here, huh? What's the matter? Drone guy, your tongue? No, he's a great guy, great guy, great guy. This is a big deal. The war is finally coming to an end for the thirty ninth and final time We have now reached the Iran W finished V two final final final. For real this time. D Pia stain. Okay, I can only imagine Trump must be so excited to go to this historic signing ceremony on Friday. Sir, are you gonna try to attend the signing ceremony on Friday Well, it depends. JD's coming in for it. He was originally going to do it. I'll probably be gone by then we're having dinner in a day and a half right. We're gonna be staying quite late.. You're not going to make the signing ceremony on Friday because of your dinner on Wednesday. Just say you don't wantan to go Don't insult our intelligence, you know? Oh, I think dinner might go like fifty hours late. Then I have Don Jior's improv show. Then it's Ramadan. You know how seriously I take that If you're missing the war for a dinner, you better be going someplace nice. I'm talking cheheesecake factory or above The French president who happens to be a very nice man. invited me to dinner Edverses And Versaill is not a gold leaf You say it's the real deal Dinner Eersai. Okay, you know what? I'm gonna give Trump this one. That's been pinned on his pint arst board since he was twelve years old Be it Verses is a beautiful palace of gold and mirrors where nothing bad ever happens to rich people, yeah. It's his happy place. It's where the Trump family goes to respawn And of course, if you're at dinner, you can't sign an agreement. Who's ever heard of signing a treaty at Versailles? G't me done. No Enjoy your beautiful dinner at the beautiful palace, because pretty soon you have to come back to Washington DC where things have taken a turn. The newly renovated reflecting pool, which was painted American flag blue, turned green with algae over the weekend. Holy shit. That ball is green It looks like there was a Ginch orgy in it Looks like the bathtub where Kermit slit his wrist. Looks like the Statue of Liberty's placenta in there, am I right? No Thank you than you I guilted you into it. Thank you. Well look, they put fourteen million dollars into building a state of the art system for keeping this pool clean. I bet we're gonna see some pretty high tech solutions kick in any minute. You can see the folks standing at the end. They're dumping jugs of some kind of a liquid into the water of the reflecting pool Sure, just dumping gallons of hydrogen peraroxida. Just love that guys. First thought, best thought. That's what I always say. Well you know what? As someone who's tried to clean a humidifier the same way, might I recommend just buying a new reflecting pool at Target Theny things. The funny thing about this story. Be that no one would have cared what the poool looked like if Donald Trump hadn't made it a centerpiece of the MAGA agenda for some reason, but he did whichich means that the people who believe in the MGa agenda, people like right wing radio host Grant Stinchfields, they're going to have some interesting ideas about how this all happens There's alle G in here again I feel like it's sabotage God Please tell me we're not doing a reflecting pool conspiracy theory. J please tell me we're not doing a reflecting pool conspiracy theory. I mean, they had just literally fixed this. You would not have that that quickly unless somebody did something. I'm telling you, I think they want Trump to fail so badly they'll come out here and do anything I agree with. As proud as I was of President Trump for finally getting this thing fixed We're back to green And again, is it nefarious? I tend to think so. Okay I guess it is nefarious if you think about it, and then you don't think about it. And if you don't think about it, AlG sounds a lot like al Qaeda. Huh I mean, I mean, how deep does this thing go? My sources are telling me like about a foot or a foot and a half, but I mean,ant, Grant. what are we missing here? I still think it may have been sabotage, even though the National Park Service comes out and says, no, no, no, it's not sabotage. They say it was algae residue left over in the pipes What if the bureaucrats left it over in the pipes on purpose? We know that those inside government don't like President Trump. Yes, of course. Those pesky bureaucrats jumped into the pipes to leave algae in there. I believe we have surveillance video of that happening. Yeah This This is the beauty of the Magaverse. Donald Trump is never too corrupt or incompetent for the job. If you always come up with a new layer of bad guy to blame the problems on. So I know the deep state photosynthesis theory sounds dopey, but so did rigged election at first, and look where that got us. Before you know it, these guys are gonna to be doing january sixth In the reflecting pool Just splash it around, chanting Dunk Mike pence. Dunk Mike pence There's a part of me that everyone sees. I'm Howie Mandel the comedian. Apparently I know what funny is. Funny bought me a house, but I also know what isn't funny OCD. I've lived with OCD my entire life and people throw the term around like it's no big deal. But OCD is severe, often debilitating. It's a mental health condition that involves unrelented, unwanted thoughts that can make you question your character, your beliefs, even your safety. General therapy can help with some things, but for OCD, it can actually make things worse That's why I want to tell you about noCD. NoCD is the world's largest treatment provider for OCD and is covered by insurance for over one hundred fifty five million Americans. Their licensed therapists specialize in ERP, the most effective treatment for OCD. If you think you might be struggling with OCD, go to ncD dot com d To book a free fifteen minute call, they are here to help You know, summer is just around the corner, which means warmer temperatures, trips to the pool and golf course, Father's Day on june twenty first, and grilling out in the backyard Dad doesn't want another tie or watch. He wants the tender, juicy taste of his favorite steak grilled to perfection. So this Father's Day, give your grill master something the whole family will enjoy. The finest proteins from Omaha Steaks Every steak and entree is flash frozen and vacuum sealed at the moment of carving. So no matter when your dad enjoys his meal, it will taste as fresh as the day it was carved When you order from Omaha steaks, your satisfaction is always guaranteed. So you can order with complete confidence The gift from Omaha Steaks is something the whole family can indulge in to celebrate the holiday. This Father's Day give the dads in your life something to savor. World famous Omaha Steaks Visit omahaakes dot com and get an extra thirty five dollars off with promo code yum at cheheckout. That's omahaeaks dot com and an extra thirty five dollars off with promo code, yum at cheheckout. Terms apply. See site for details We are one week into the FIFA World Cup. And yes Th are happening it all over North America, I am so pumped. I haven't used my hands for anything all week Wiping my butt with my feet was a challenge, but don't worry, I'm still working on figuring it out. It's also been a big deal for the host cities, although some could have prepared just a bit better. Boston has found an unintended consequence of the World Cup. They're running out of beer. Some bar owners say soccer fans are drinking beer almost faster than they can for it. Boston ran out of beer But how will they get the children to sleep And by the way, it's not just bars. There's no beer at any of the places in Boston that serve alcohol, restaurants, taverns, libraries, hospitals, AA meetings The city is bone dry. I mean, how could this have happened? There's a decent chance Scotland had something to do with it. The way ple. There was no beers. The thoughtt plans just bumped the place dry and all they had was like bud light I love how even Scottish fans are like, we're desperate for beer, but not like bud light desperate In fact, I believe we have a clip of a Scottish fan in Boston being told there's only bud lightight left It's a proud culture, a very proud culture You know what let's for Let's move on to the only thing more exciting than the World Cup, Jadie Bance Now he's been making the rounds to promote his new book. He was on Fox News. He was on Megan Kelly. He was on The View. He was on CNN. And of course, he also swung by the popular right wing podcast Fat Guys withith Gatees and sunglasses. No, obviously, this press tour has an ulterior motive. It's no secret that JD Vance wants to run for president someday But there is one little hiccup that JD is trying to overcome. JD Vance does not ooze warmth or charm. Who's not the most charismatic individual. He lacks charisma. Tuly zero charisma. Yeah. None. He has no Riz, which means charisma. for you guyss be not improisa. You know what If this student cououncil president says JD has no risk. I believe it But this press tour is the perfect opportunity for JD to show off that natural charm and camera presence that will launch him to the presidency. JD, hit us with a joke. What do you call a fly with no wings A walk Okay, very good Can you feel the electricity? I don't know how you do it, but you make Mike Pence look like Richard Priyor I mean, seriously, seriously, Jie, for someone whose mom did a lot of drugs, I thought you'd be cooler But if JD's appearance on the five didn't show his presidential chops, it did show how he is such a good vice president for Donald Trump, spepecifically, his lack of ability to speak up for himself. He'll stomach anything that comes his way, even if that thing is objectively disgusting. All, we got pickle cake here. Dozens of layers of creamy green frosting complete with tiny chunks of pickle rind. I was gonna do fudge 'cause it's National Fudge Day for the VP, but I thought it would be too gay. So I did pickle cake instead I'm not sure if I got tickle. Thank you for being here, mister Vice President. Okay. Hold on, you think fudge is gay, but the pickle cake is straight shaped like a penis. Oh no, Fight for me, I'm all heteroan. I'll have this dildo Pie. Thank you very much. Look, lookook, Fox news, Fox, Fox, Fox, listen to me, I'm here to help. Your homophobia is ruining your lives. Look, you have, you have to do. Listen, listen, listen, listen, You have the opportunity to enjoy delicious fudge with your friends. But instead, you're eating fucking pickle cake. Your ignorant cruelty has trapped you in a fudgeless prison of your own design You know what? Get it Lets move up let's move on. Let's move on from JD to the man whose gold slathered office he hopes to step into. Today, Today, the details of Trump's peace deal with Iran finally came out. And this is going to shock you doesn't actually include any of the big wins he promised. In fact, it kicks the can on Iran's nuclear stockpile while allowing Iran to eventually charge fees in the Strait of Hormuz and committing the US to end sanctions and facilitate a three hundred billion dollars reconstruction fund You know what I'm sure like everything else, the entire GOP is going to fall in line and support the deal one hundred percent. The details of this agreement, as we've seen them, it does not look like we are the victors. This doesn't feel like a victory. I thought somebody was spoofing me. Iran is the biggest winner of all this. Trump stages an Iran retreat. Tremendous foreign policy blunder. makes absolutely no sense. Smacks of impasement. It's not defensible. inexplicable disaster. They've played him like a byol land Excuse me, sir I don't know if I'd equate Trump with the soft, dulcid tones of a violin. He's more like an entitled kazoo or a A moraca filled with angry bees So, Trump has a lot of work to do to appease this angry faction of his base. He could appeal to their sense of reason or to the obvious need for a negotiated settlement that will necessarily require some concessions or He could just push the shit on Obama button. I mean, the JCPOA done by Obama He handed them a billion seven in cash. they tried to bribe their way out of it And you know what Iranians did. They laughed at Obama and they said he's a stupid son of a bitch Okay, thank you very much.. You know one I never thought I'd say this, but can you carry yourself with a bit more dignity in front of the dictator of Egypt Dear Lord, man, there's a pack of poor French translators off to the side like a kiset stupid son of a bitch Look Well look, look, who knows? Who knows if this peace deal with Iran is going to work, but if all doesn't go well, rest assured, Trump has a very solid plan B. Well If it works out, I'm gonna take the credit. If it doesn't work out, I'm blaming JD. You better be careful, JD. Whoa. Look at that Trump, always playing five D scapegoating. I tell you, Jamie is gonna be so bummed to hear about this once he finishes shitting out all of that pickle cake. Let' start with the big news of the day. Now not the K parade. We'll get to that later. How many times do I have to tell you, kids, you can't have your next parade until you finish your Iran war? Okaykay Speaking of that, great news. The Iran warar is finished in the gilded halls of Versailles. Itina. President Trump marking the end of the G seven summit by signing a memorandum of understanding with Iran That was it That was signing the peace treaty. It felt more like paying the bill after dinner. Did Iran get the jalapeno poppers? Beause I didn't have any of the poppers. I shouldn't have to pay for half the poppers. Although I can understand why Trump didn't want a bigger ceremony than this. If you look at the details of this deal, it's not really that great for The agreement's most controversial provision, a three hundred billion dollars framework for the reconstruction of Iran, and the return of over one hundred billion dollars in assets that were frozen by the US. In exchange, Iran must allow toll free passage through the Strait of Hormuz for sixty days, which existed before the war three hundred billion dollars. I mean, how did that happen You know what? Wait a minute, can we Can we zoom in there for a second? Can we zoom in? There it is They got it with that automatic gratuity. You gotta watch out for that So basically, we go back to where we were before the war, except Iran gets four hundred billion dollars. And to add insult to injury, the Ayatlla is using all that cash to build himself a sweet ass ballroom You know what? Maybe it's worth giving Iran a big old bribe if it means completely eliminating their military apparatus. He conceded yesterday that it will not completely eliminate their military apparatus. What? didn't they have a whole ballistic missile arsenal that we were trying to dismantle The president is saying it would be unfair for Iran not to have a ballistic missile arsenal while their neighbors in the Gulf do. If other countries have them It's a little bit unfair for them not to have some Slow down there, Miss Rachel. I don't know if sharing as carrying applies to ICBMs Okay, All right, I'm a bit confused here. I'm trying to remember Trump's position on all of this before the treaty We are going to destroy their missiles and raise their missile industry to the ground. It will be Totally again Obliterated. Okay, okay That sounds bad. Maybe that was taken out of context. canan we play the rest of the sentence? It will be totally again obliterated unless it's a little bit unfair. Okay, o. Yes, thank you. S, S, see, and you people doubted his dedication to equity and inclusion But the fact that Donald Trump started a war that ended badly for him is not really a surprise. What's a little shocy is that conservatives are calling him out on it. The details that I've seen so far look like look awful. I don't want to see theocratic Islamists who want to kill us made stronger. Count mean the skeptical column? They're going to recover everything we've taken away from them. It's much bigger than a mistake They're better off than they were before the hostilities began. Wow That assessment is brutal for Trump. I mean, the man who went to his barber and said, I want my head to look like the reservoir tip of a condom thinkinks you have bad judgment , mister President, you need to bring the skeptics onto your side, and I'm sure you'll marshal all of your rhetorical wit and persuasive techniques to do so. a furious response from the president. This is what he wrote before dawn. These fools who think I haven't been tough enough on Iran, they're just either jealous, bad people or stupid Masterful sir. Masterful. Oh, o

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