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The Daily Show: Ears Edition

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Improv and the Birthday Paradox

From Trump Autopens the Iran Deal, Lands a Res at G7 Summit & Spawns an Algae Conspiracy | Britt LowerJun 17, 2026

Excerpt from The Daily Show: Ears Edition

Trump Autopens the Iran Deal, Lands a Res at G7 Summit & Spawns an Algae Conspiracy | Britt LowerJun 17, 2026 — starts at 0:00

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So if you hooked up with it, you should really get tested But first, Donald Trump's in France, so let's get into it with our continuing coverage of Trump Meets World International humiliation, one after another Yesterday, Donald Trump touched down in France for the G seven Summit, a forum where world leaders meet to discuss a book they all read This monud's pick was fame sick, a really nice choice The summit is being held in the city of Evon, which costs twice as much as a normal city For no reason at all I mean, wouldould it kill you to hold this conference in the village of Kirkland's Signature?, come on But regardless, Trump's been having a blast. President Emmanuel Macron welcomed him in what seemed like a very special edition of the Golden Bachelor. Oh Dry make me think. Cannot wait to get into the hot turub with this little number Trump's goal at the summit is to work with our allies and strengthen America's standing in the world. I'm fking with you. Is there for the presence? The German Chancellor offering President Trump a customized German football jersey. Oh. You can tell he really loves it, you know? Wow, a size medium shirt. Yeahah, thanks. You know, Cutter got me a plane, right? Although, if the Germans insist on giving Trump one of their uniforms, this probably is the best case scenario J'm just thinking it through him. He' into those heritage editions. That's not to say President Trump showed up to the G seven empty bruise handed. No. Because he had his own gift for Europe, a peace deal with Iran that he just signed two days before, or or did he. The president and the vice president signed this agreement electronically forty eight hours ago Well, well, well. An electronic signature, huh? Looks like the autopen R has become the autopen E Got him. Got him. takeake that Cquers it Seriously, is the Docu signed peace agreement even legally binding? There's something disqualifying about a treaty that was signed in an open tab next to porn up ice drin there. Now, so far, Trump is keeping the details of the deal hidden, but it doesn't matter. because the leaders in the region, like the president of the UAE, are just happy for peace. Without your support, your commitment to mister President Not my country, w you but The Middle East will be in a different part of the world different situation today How moving I assume it was a A littleittle hard to hear him But I'm sure his demeanor of gratitude and humility is what resonated with President Trump. Well love it. Thankk you, my friend See, when you're that rich, you can speak that lone I was just wondering, can anybody hear that? But when you're so rich, you have such confidence that you don't have to do any straam to the voice. It's great. Wow This broken man just had his whole country droned and Trump is like, Hey, check out the president of ASMR over here, huh? What's the matter? D drone guy, your tongue? No, he's a great guy, great guy, great guy. This is a big deal. The war is finally coming to an end for the thirty ninth and final time We have now reached the Iran War finished V two final final L. For real this time. D Pia. Okay, I can only imagine Trump must be so excited to go to this historic signing ceremony on Friday. Sir, are you gonna try to attend the signing ceremony on Friday Well, it depends. J. he's coming in for it. He was originally going to do it. I'll probably be gone by then we're having dinner in a day and a half, right? We're gonna be staying quite late. holdold' You're not going to make the signing ceremony on Friday because of your dinner on Wednesday Just say you don't wan tona go Don't insult our intelligence, you know? Oh, I think dinner might go like fifty hours late. Thaten I have Don Junror's improv show. That's Ramadan, You know how seriously I take that. If you're missing the war for a dinner, you better be going someplace nice. I'm talking cheesecake factory or above. The French president who happens to be a very nice man, invited me to dinner at Versailles And Versailles is not a gold leaf. Versilles is the real deal Dinner ersailles. Okay, you know what? I'm gonna give Trump this one. That's been pinned on his pintterst board since he was twelve years old B Versailles is a beautiful palace of gold and mirrors where nothing bad ever happens to rich people, yeah It's his happppy place. It's where the Trump family goes to respawn. And of course, if you're at dinner, you can't sign an agreement. Who's ever heard of signing a treaty at Versailles? C can't be done. Enjoy your beautiful dinner at the beautiful palace, because pretty soon you have to come back to Washington, DC where things have taken a turn. The newly renovated reflecting pool, which was painted American flag blue, turned green with algae over the weekend. Holy shit. The fool is green It looks like there was a Ginch orgy in it Looks like the bathtub where Kermit slit his wrist This looks like the Statue of Lberty's placenta in there, am I right? No Thank you. than you I guilted you into it. Thank you Well look, they put fourteen million dollars into building a state of the art system for keeping this pool clean. And bet we're going to see some pretty high tech solutions kick in any minute. You can see the folks standing at the end. They're dumping jugs of some kind of a liquid into the water of the reflecting pool Sure, just dumuff in gallons of hydrogen peroxida. Just love that guys. First thought, best thought. That's what I always say Well, you know what, as someone who's tried to clean a humidifier the same way, might I recommend just buying a new reflecting pool at Target The funny the funny thing about this story is that no one would have cared what the poool looked like if Donald Trump hadn't made it a centerpiece of the MAGA agenda for some reason, but he did, which means that the people who believe in the MAGA agenda, people like right wing radio host, Grant Stinchfield, they're going to have some interesting ideas about how this all happened There's algae in here again. I feel like it's sabotage Oh God Just please tell me we're not doing a reflecting pool conspiracy theory. Just please tell me we're not doing a reflecting pool conspiracy theory. I mean, they had just literally fixed this. You would not have that that quickly unless somebody did something, I'm telling you I think they want Trump to fail so badly that they'll come out here and do anything. I agree with you. As proud as I was of President Trump for finally getting this thing fixed We're back to green And again, is it nefarious? I tend to think so. Okay I guess it is nefarious if you think about it, and then you don't think about it And if you don't think about it, alG sounds a lot like al Qaeda. huh I mean, I mean, how deep does this thing go? My sources are telling me like about a foot or a foot and a half. but I mean, Gant, Grant. what are we missing here? I still think it may have been sabotage, even though the National Park Service comes out and says, no, no, no, it's not sabotage. they say it It was algae residue left over in the pipes What if the bureaucrats left it over in the pipes on purpose? We know that those inside government don't like President Trump. Yes, of course. Those pesky bureaucrats jumped into the pipes to leave algae in there I believe we have surveillance video of that happening Yeah This This is the beauty of the Magaverse. Donald Trump is never too corrupt or incompetent for the job. If you always come up with a new layer of bad guy to blame the problems on. So I know the deep state photosynthesis theory sounds dopey, but so did rigged election at first, and look where that got us. Before you know it, these guys are gonna to be doing january sixth in the reflecting pool Just splash it around, chanting Dunk, Mike pence. Dunk Mike pence We come back, we find out what doed government workers are up to. Don't go away. 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So he enlisted Elon Musk to remove the bureaucratic con artists wasting our money A year ago, I confronted these alleged fraudsters fired by Doge, and you'd think they'd be done with the government for good. But actually, they're not. I'm Alexis Cololdstein, and I'm running for Congress in Maryland. My name's Alyisssa Ellman, and right now I'm running for Congress for the New York's twenty fourth Congressional district. My name is Michael Duffin, and I'm running as a Democrat in Virginia's eighth district. I'm Tracy Star, and I am running for Congress in Maryland's conongressional district, number five Wow, truly inspirational is what I would be saying if they weren't running back to the government who humiliated them. More than three dozen former federal workers who quit or lost their jobs last year in the wake of cuts from Doge are now running for political office Okay, but these weirdos must have an ulterior motive I know what you're doing. You're getting into a position of power so you can commit more waste fraud and abuse. I'd call it T trying to make some change. it's time to fight back. I'm just so mad that I was finally like I feel like I could do a better job than the people that are currently running things, so why not? We need people who O focused on public service. It's accountability, it's justice, it's reform I'm sorry, I've been covering politics for the last ten years. Can you explain to me what accountability is? Is it like a stock market thing Hm, I see what's happening. These scorned civil servants want revenge It's not revenge. I want to continue my public service. Look, there's nothing to be ashamed of. Revenge is a powerful motivator. Just look at the president. It's like his whole thing. I'd like to get my revenge illgally. I'm in this to do the real work of public service. So you're telling me that you're actually running because you care about public service. I actually do And I'm afraid that my opponent only cares about her career. and That's not enough It is so off putting when people are just obsessed with their careers all the time and obsessed with themselves, quite frankly. Joel, you're tight enough on me, aren't you Sometimes he goes so wide. And it's like, what am I looking at You know, let's just move on. We don't have time. This isn't about me Okay, I'm looking for the John Wick of the federal bureaucracy, someomeone who isn't running to serve the people, but rather to settle the score. I am getting into a position of power, yes, to go in there and to say You need to go My turn. You're coming back for revenge. Yes, I am Bring on. Finally, just the villain I've been looking for. I can't wait to hear what cruel pl she has cooked up for her enemies All right, hit me with your best revenge plot. What are you gonna do? We all across America been affected by all of this. And so my whole revenge plot centers around the American people. I want to help people. That is a very sweet Wholesome rib. I think we need less hallmark energy and more kill bill energy. You know what I mean One time Jordan Clepper ate one of my yogurts from the fridge. So I told him his kid wasn't his. It was hilarious They haven't talked in months And Petty? Does that help? Let's go with that. Let's double down on the pettiness. I've worked inside all these different systems of power, Wall Street, the government, I've lobbied Congress. So it's sort of like, I've cased the joint. And now I'm ready for the heist. Say no more. Pist has always been on my buckget list I was thinking more like maybe a bill first or like some laws. No, totally. Yeah, like a legislative hice That's what I meant to too. These people who were fired for waste fraud and abuse were about to voluntarily enter a world of waste fraud and abuse. And it was obvious from their half baked revenge plots that they were going to need my help You're about to go up against some seriously corrupt politicians. I need to test you to see if you're ready Tell me your party platform in fifteen seconds anti corruption, government reform wororking on You didn't ask me for a donation once Not on Ted Cruz is next to you in the lunchline You can smell his breath on the back of your neck He's asked if he can sit next to you. What do you do? Run away Okay, you got that one right This is something I never thought I'd see, like Bigfoot or a hit TV show about gay hockey players, but these candidates seem to want to help. They were political unicorns I'm getting this Feing that I I don't know what to do with. I haven't felt it in a long time U It's like g. Like the cynicism is kind of washing away a little bit and Sightly less rageful. Now, I think it's perimenopause Save more on what you need to get the job done right. Right now, at Lows! 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Viagara is a registered trademark of Vatrice specialty LL HimS is not affiliated with or endorsed by Viatrice. start to the new Netflix series, I will Find You. Please welcome Britt Lauower , your house is so friendly.. These are the best smartest people money can buy. I will tell. I will tell you. C you feel them watching that clip just like? Yeah. Was everyone gripping their their own like steering wheel? Yes. everyverybody's holding, Everybody's around. What am I going to do? Are you Are you addicted to playing characters who have to get out of stressful situations? Oh yeah, it's an issue. It is. You just want to be in a place of tension and uncertainty at all times. That's right, it's right It's my therapist's whole idea of healing, I guess. Let me tell you, as long as you can work in Hollywood and use that as therapy, you are doing something right. Congratulations. Thank you.. I'm so excited for people to see the show and I brought you this gift. It didn't used to have my face on it, but now it does Your face is out a book. I know. I didn't write it. No Harlan Cobin wrote it. D we have fans here? Yeah. you're part of the Harlland Cobin, you're part of the HCU now. You're in his universe. Yeah It's like a whole genre. It's like science fiction, Western and Cob Are you ready for the Harlan Cobin suuper fans? Are you ready? You ready? ready. They're gonna come. This is great. I like that you're like, there's a new Netflix series. Do you want to read the book first? How much time do you think I have, Bret, for God's skes. You must have a lot. I have so much free time. Let me tell you. It is great. I binged it this past week A thank you. It's fant. For the people who haven't seen it, I don't want to give away any spoilers. No, we can't. What's happening with? I will findight you Okay, so it's about a journalist played by me Congratulations. Thank you. You were my inspiration. Thank. It really shes It shines. I'm scream. Yeah, you can see. He. Okay, good. I'm glad you saw that. And then Sam Worthington plays a fugitive. and we're both on a journey to find U, his son I will find you. It's a very clear action. fine And we're doing it How do you get into character with the journalists? Are you doing journalistic research or you just watching the Daily Show to try to figure out how I pretend how to do it? Like I said, it's just watching you Pase watch me. Thank you. Yes This is why you get Emmies. They give you Emmys because of this sort of research. ye. Thank God. Well, I do feel like journalism and acting, they're sort of spiritual cousins. There's a shared DNA, right? Your job and our job is to really deeply listen and to find the humanity in people's stories And that's what I really connected to about this character. She's Shes she's kind of like an old soul I worked with the prop department to pack her bag that she has with her. And inside was a thirty five millimeter camera a handheld recorder, a notebook. She's just a really like handands on Tile boots on the ground kind of reporter. And yeah And mostly it was just inspired by you. Yes, than you. Yes. Yes. I know you did that with severance as well, correct? You kept sort of a journal of some of the paintings that your character would make. Like you seem to take your artistic interests and hobbies and use them To sort of flesh out these characters. Is it fair to say that you're a painter? You play ukule for my understanding? Sometimes. Sometimes. And sort of mediocre, but I think Is it all ukulele sort of miocre? Oh bird.. ukulele players come at him. Those ukule have one sad strum that still sounds kind of happy.'re like Oh But I do feel like if you're holding a ukule, like you can't really be that sad. No I was good to say, you're finding some joy, right? Yeah. You can't also be that artistically inclined. It's like get You takeake thatake that take that. takeake that. You better watch out. You're right, you're right. I need to back up here. But you have I think what I find most compelling about sort of your journey as well is your interest outside I know like you get you've done circus. You stepped away from severance and did circus. I did. You have many other hobbies. Do you see your I told him, I was like, justust can you guys take a break for a second? I'm gonna go do the circus. I gota t you wan to finish the season? I'm like, no. Yeah, We blame you for the fact that there isn't a season three yet, right? Is that? Oh No' But things take time. They do. You're right. You know? You can't just shit it out. It's a o Okay, well That's a totally other story. That's something toldally. No I'm curious I'm curious as somebody who is an artist in many senses of it all. Do you view as the other things that you do in service of your acting projects or do you see them as something that live outside of them Such a great question. You're such a great journal. This is this is one. And you're so perceptive, than you I mean, I think anything you do in life is going filter into the art that you make. And Yeah Well you also do impprov? I do. I started out in improv and we were trying to remember how we know each other and we have no idea. But we sort of met in Chicago in the improv scene. There's something about listening. There's something about being present with another person. Very much. And like stepping out into the total mystery of like, I have no idea what's gonna to happen. And I have to have my sc partners back. Yeah. There's a beauty in that. It's giving over to that moment. There's also like an acceptance of failure. I know you still do improv. Yes You Are you implying that I'm failing I guess what I say there's an element of what is fun about improv is that it doesn't work. Yes ninety percent of the time.ally. Whereas in acting, you get another take. Yes. rightight. It's like the one time in life when you get like a second chance at a moment That's what's so exciting about it. You're like, I'm gonna try to get this more real every time. But an improv, it's one and done.. You're failing and it's over. Is that harder out Because people people know you. They have expectations of you. Like what is your relationship with to an audience now doing an improv show Oh, it's a delight. I mean, it's kind of like an emotional thing. I guess, stepping out and just I improvise with my college friends from Chicago. and so yeah, we just have such a good time and there's on the edge of The mystery Oh, the edge of the mystery the edge of the mystery. Are you able to utilize that in do something like this? I mean, I will find you is 's you find the funny in the comedy that is there, but it is a taught thriller. It is moving. It is plotted really well. It's nothing but cliffhangers. Like how do you find those moments of levity and those moments of improv in something that is plotted like this Well, Sam and I had a great time on set A fun fact is that he and I have the same birthday No. And when that And you can see that on screen. You really can Yeah. It's purely the reason why we got cast. If you have an august second birthday, you're gonna be on our show. This is This is what I've been saying. when I've been bugging my agents and manager about why I'm not getting this role, they're like, you were bored on the wrong day. M I'm sorry. That march ninth is no good. Okay, wait, but have you ever heard of the birthday paradox? No, I have not. Okay. my God. seeee, here's the deal I go to the Maga universe and I get flat earth Algae deep state, and now you're giving me bir in paradise. B All right, what are weally not even a paradox. it's just math. So don't be so scared. Okay, thank you. All right. stillill a little fright. So if two people are in the room together, there's a one in three hundred and sixty five chance that they have the same birthday, right? Right. But if there's twenty three people in the room There's a fifty, fifty chance Like who else here was born on august second Is that right? Tylon was. Is that right . Look at this. I think it's like in a room of seventy three people, it's like ninety nine percent chance you'll like that two people will have the same birthday. And look at this, we did I' on the sh. How are you acting? I' find you starting you and me Fide you is fantastic. Also you won an Emmy for severance. which love des that slacker Ben Stiller to stop watching basketball games and get working on season three. We need that to help. We're doing it. We're doing it Yes, yes, incredible work. Thank you so much. And congratulations, most of all for being on a book. Okay? book. You're on a book. She did. Our Ramascals is youac cada project while heant anyere. Our Achina Porento Nunas Alexion de Puertas andradas Santiores personalis Ss. Adamas our Renta do Aresenunquit the doos Ramientas the Wolf deaine Voltos Max Porentos Centa Nueedores. Yenel Proesqu the Lws try to list the materialis escrita and una photo in reciibuna coticion andinutos Aelisus prorojectos meint Trasigz Oando Coos, Aiostacioo Scary resistanceceslection, Mar Polua.

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