Childhood Influences and Existentialism

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She's got a new movie out, Brian with William H. Macy and others. You're traveling in a very rareified air now and she's got A one person play playgirl. So let's start just there. How do you arrive at a place where you want one light on you and you're gonna to do It's going be all you, nobody else Yeah. well I the play playaygirl is all improvised and so It's for the most part, comes out of my improv background. That's a huge part of my background. I've been improvising for a long, long time And I had done some solo stuff Um a woman Deana Oliver the Groundlings. had conceived of this really cool thing called one where she would have her favorite improvisers improvise a one person show. And she had certain things that were a part of it. like she would have the audience build three sets on the stage and she would ask the audience What's the name of this person doing this one person show Um, And you kind of always knew because it was a one person show You'll be breaking the fourth wall, you'll be talking the audience sometimes. And Anyway, I' had a little experience with that and it was sort of Mind bending and thrilling to improvise by myself, which I had never done before and the first time I did it Right before I did it, I had done the regular improv show at the Groundlings. And I remember watching two of my friends do a scene and I was laughing so hard and just feeling the magic of improv and the thing of The thing of seeing in real time Oh, this person's idea isn't what's happening and this person's idea isn't what it's happening theirir ideas met in the air and squished up. and now this magic is happening And It hit me like a chill and I thought, What did I agree to do tonight? Why am I Why would I do this by myself? That's not what this is. What is this going to be And I've quickly realized through doing that show with her Oh, if I let it If I let it happen It can be a lot of people on stage with me. Right. You're creating all of them, right? Let your creativity run amock. Totally. And I can count on them and mess with them the way that I would do other improvisers Um And they're all me But I remember that became super, super clear One of the early ones I did with her Um I had improvised a dorm room. They were like Six or seven kids in a dorm room And I was one of them. and I was all of them, but I was the main character was correct you, ye. Yes. I was all of them. but I had I had improvised a door coming on too the stage and there's two practical doors there, but I didn't use either of those. I had improvised a door And then when I went to leave as the main character, I couldn't remember which way the door went. and where the knob was And in a split second in my head, I thought, ask that guy And so I asked that guy, who's me and he knew All right And I was like, o, okay. so I can just let myself go crazy enough. All right, so this is a weird question, but have you always had an assortment of voices in your head and now this allows you to bring some of them to life? You know I've always liked I've always loved characters and gravitating toward characters and creating characters and staring at people and u wanting to do them for my family and Yeah, I don't know if it was ever a collection before this Um, But it's It's a very Interesting and weird sensation. And then especially with Playgirl, which I started doing, which is It just has no format on it's just a completely improvised play by myself And I talk to the audience for a while and I get some notions. Id tell them I get them to talk to me a little, they name the play, they tell me some other stuff and then I just start And the thing that's been Interesting Is it alwaysways every time I've done it, I've done it Probably nine or ten times now Every time I've done it, it's the length of a real play And I think probably that comes from The experiences I've had with Ipro Theater, which is a group I'm part of here in L.A. and we improvise full length plays Usually in styles and genres. Pe usually with people. this helps That always gives you a minute to think to improvise' always a way for people to gather yourself like yes, with real people conjured people. But I think because we improvise plays, that's given me a sense of how long a play is and what it feels like those we do. in costume with sets and we have an intermission. like it's fully fully a theater experience. This is the most challenging thing you've ever done. Yes. Playgirl, Yes. And that's why you chose it? Yes. I want I wanted it to be more challenging and more wild west Okay, but you're coming off creating a seminal character. We talked a little bit with Ted Danson about this, the idea that you work all your life to have a character that is memorable for everyone. and then you immediately start wondering, well, will I ever have another one of Sure. Sure You know, I maybe I'm like, is the word hope or I feel like I just I know I know they're in me. I So I was going to say, yeah, I hope I can, but I know I can. I just It'll be figuring out where that happens or know they're in you though. You know what Jy Gemstone is in you. I've heard you describe it as uncaaging the bitch and letting her run free is Jud Gemstone. You think there are multiple ones of these existing in there For sure. Wow. So you have a great deal more confidence than the neurotic Ted Danson that you know that these characters exist for you and you know you're going you now have the chance to birth all of them Yeah, I just I don't know exactly who it's going to be or what The what it's going to be. But yeah, in playlgl I never know who's going to come out, but I know I know somebody's going to and usually every play has ten or eleven people in a So I end up Yeah, I end up liking a lot of them. But the reason I asked the question is what an interesting challenge for you to choose after whatever is seminal arriving of I've created a character and a show that everyone loves. You're choosing a path that is An alternate path. You could do anything and you're choosing to invest in improv. It seems like the sc it seems like the scariest thing where it's not even a skeleton. You're just up there with your talent and your vulnerability. Yeah It is scary until it starts. It it's very a weird kind of nerve wracking. I love performing live, but I do have to sort of fight through some stuff before this show But if I If I can get to a place of u with Playgirl and with if I'm filming something, if I can get to a place of full fuck it And if I can get to a place of knowing that The only way that The only way path, etcera that works for me is me letting it rip. whether that's a very subdued person or a very I don't even mean like the person has to be wild and screamy. but if I I have to get to a place where I can let it rip emotionally And then I know it will be true then. I guess that's what I mean. I know there are a lot of true Tue characters inside of me. yeah Well, but if you arrived at real and honest and authentic fuck it, because if you've arrived at real and honest, authentic fuck it, you have conquered Hollywood. you've conquered all of the demons that plague the creative people if you can actually do just fuck it. I'm going My creative talent is enough and the deeper I dig into the fear reservoir and past all of it, I'm going to find the greatest versions of me. It's I can get there. It's definitely an ebb and flow. and I'm not saying, oh, I constantly have that feeling or I constantly know that. Of course there's worry of like, yeah, but what is the next major thing I'm going to do because because Gemstones and being Judy was I've the best gift of my life up to that point. So yeah, if I focus too hard on like,, what could be as good It can feel terrifying, but I know I know it's all going to work out. Nice. I usually do not find that in actors. Usually that is not something that but you've had a lot of success and you've learned a great deal. You've been doing all of this a long time. You've worked. You know what good what working with good people feels like and now you're tackling endeavors that are just the ones you want to tackle, right? You get to make your own choices now. Yeah, No, well, I mean, I'm still still trying to get things, you know, like I still I still M striving to a make a movie I want to make and I'm still, you know, putting myself on tape sometimes for things and like It's It's not that there's no Um confusion or struggle in the mix It's Just I just know The other place is the place that creatively works for me. So if I can just keep bringing my brain back to that. The movie you wrote you wrote one with Dany McBride, right? And so where is that? Like do you know Are you certain that if that gets made, you have the confidence like there's no way that this isn't the best representation of what it is that we do Well, I I don't I have no idea if anyone will will like it or how it will land on people, but I know that I love it and we love it And I know put my whole heart and soul into it And That's That's all I can do It is all you can do about success, but you got to feel at this point that you and Danny have good governors that if you think something's good, it's good I Yeah, I think so, but I do I do also know all of that subjective. But yeah, I do think if far If we both think something is good and funny For me, definitely, I think it's good. I think he's got such a such a sharp end astute and funny brain Um I feel like I feel like it'll be great. You skipped past a couple of things. when you said I work through some stuff, but I have to work through some stuff sometimes before getting out there. What arere you skipping past some stuff that has some details in it that are panicky Oh yeah, for sure Um, and and I would say it's becausecause all of the things can come in of sort of paradigms that I don't know, that wor'd to think about of like Oh, if this goes well then this or if this doesn't go well then this or if this person is out there and they think this or I really have to get to a place of Truly forgetting who's coming U That's just all fear you're talking about. L that's all of is just anxiety, fear based Totally. doesnesn't help at all. Totally And sometimes those sirens or alarm bells can be so loud that I've The one thing I've figured out for making that all go away, whether I'm about to shoot a scene for a movie or a show or whether I'm about to do playaygirl is Um truly Remind myself that we're all gonna die And I don't and none of us knows when. And it's great way to do it. If I only have tonight, which I very well might. Right Be there's no telling Um I might as well have a blast. And then What's the worst that could happen You can make a list of horrible things that could happen, but Oh well, att least I let it rip. All right, give me an example though, give me the name that set off the sirens the most where you most had to say to yourself, Well we're all gonna to die. The one The one you're like, I don't am I performing for this person? This is a little scarier than the average person. It could be someone you respect, someomeone who I don't even know what gets conjured when I ask you that question. Yeah with This show in particular, it's more like the sirens and the bells. are Just the more almost esoteric notion of Oh, I'm I agreed to do this by myself I'm doing I'm going to get out there and improvise by myself Hell. So it's mostly that's the big beast. Right. And then what have I chosen? What have I done? I made all of this. now I have to go do it. Totally. Damn And it's almost like I just have to Yeah, give everything permission. I have to I have to remember that we're all gonna die and say a prayer and literally just ask Just ask and remind God to come through me. I'm hoping to channel every time I do that. Really So it's a spiritual. So it's improv for me is very spiritual. And God's there. yeah. No it's the most whatever you call a God. That's the most surping it can be, right? It's the most It's for me for it to be good, it has to be. Um It has to be so present Because if I if I start to Yeah, if I start to try or if I start to thinkink too much, it's Something's off. it's You're not just letting it fly. You have to you're going to your creative epicenter. Tust Tusting that whatever's going to come out of there is going to be funny Totally. And it and you have to be relaxed. Totally. So it's yeah, it's a limp jump off a cliff and just just really, really Just trusting, o the w you know the wind is strong enough that you're not gonna fall round is here and Draft Kings Sports has you covered for every single match. The Draft Kings app is now available in all fifty states and includes all markets, bringing the action straight to your fingertips wherever you are. New Draft Kings customers sign up with code Beach, spend five bucks, and get two hundred dollars in rewards Within twenty one days that's calledod Beach in partnership with Draft Kings, the crown is yours. Bet with DK spports Book, Gambling probleblem call one eight hundred Gambler, one eight hundred My reset, Connecticut called eight seven hundred eight nine seven seven seven seven or visit cCPG dot orgot Onhalf of Boothoe Casino in Kansas, B tax pass through may apply in Illinois. twenty one and over, Void in Canada. E event contract trading with Draft Kings predictions involves risk of loss. Availability varies. Bet to get bonus bets that expire in seven days. Trade to get fifty dollars in predictions dollars that expire in one year. issued every seven days via click to cllaim for twenty one days. one non withdrawable reward redeemable. Predictions offer void in New York ends july nineteenth. Turns at dKNG dot co slash audio Can you take me back to twenty eighteen, The Hyatt House, you're living for six months during the pilot of the righteous Gemstones at a place that felt Like you were gonna birt something special or Yeah. well the six the six months Um was when I was writing on the first season of the gemstones. and then o, maybe that was after. So okay, the whole the chunk of six months was when I was writing and we lived there doing the pilot for Um Six weeks, maybe Um, But the whole place changed for me once other cast members were there and doing that. By the way, that was a mistake to live in a hotel for six months while writing U It became the shining It became the shining. Yeah it just becomes so weird. And then like I don't know, day four or whatever you go huh fan in the bathroom never turns off And H I think I made the alarms of the entire building go off trying to make a beyond burger. Like just you just start to feel weird and there were enough. Four days in. fourour days into once you start to feel weird. I would say two weeks into six months, but I was so stoked B in on the creation of all of it that u Those those, uh feelings and u Almost. Almost psychosis creepings of being in that hotel room for so long U Did't move They got smooushed down because I was so excited to be creating this show and helping create the show It was one of those where after. I don't know if you've ever had this, but The times of my life that I've had like Um you know depressed periods or It's almost like I see it after. And I go, o, you know, and I was pretty I pretty fucked up then or I was pretty down Um That was one of those after where I was so happy. With everything that was happening, it was almost like I could look at a sliver of it after and go, Ooh, I was not doing great living in that hotel room. Oh we okay. so it was almost like it was dark, but you were bullied by what it is you were doing and so focused on it. almost didn't even notice how bad it was. And then in retrospect, I would go like, oh, I should never do that again I should never live in a hotel for that long. Yeah I I should live somewhere different that feels more like a person but live. You knew while you were doing that, because you'd done vice Pinciples, so you knew the people that you're working with, you trust they're funny and you know you have to c straight. Yeah. And I imagine that was also fun. Vice principles was fun to do off the charts. It was Vice principals was the first time In my life, I hadd done some very cool things, but that was the first time in my life that I thought Oh, this This show at this time with these people is exactly where I'm supposed to be And this is exactly what I'm supposed to be doing and it morphed and I was supposed to do I think four episodes in the first season. And then that completely morphed and I became u kind of the fatal attraction bad guy and then was in all of the second season and it was yeah, it was magical Did you fit in right away writing wise or were you intimidated in any way? I didn't write on that show. Okay. so yeah. I just was on that show and then We I think through Danny and I improvising together, we kind of discovered like, o, I I think we could probably write well together. And so then Me, Danny, and our friend Jeff Rradley, who's also a writer. on gemstones and vice principles, we We wrote the movie that we were talking about earlier. And you feel like you feel like you belong instantaneously. There's no Yeah, we wrote we wrote that movie initially so so easily and so Um with such an interesting flow And it was so fun. and then From the jump with gemstones, he asked me to come be a writer as well, as being Judy So u Yeah, it was always just a cool a cool meeting of the mind Who is the person most likely to break on the set of righteous gemstones and ruin a scene? Hmm You know what? No one will ruin a scene That's pretty that is pretty, pretty rare Gosh Almost say maybe this is just because he's who I like to make laugh. I would almost say Danny would be the most likely to laugh, but that may just be something inside me going like That's who I Hes he's who can wake up like a shark in me who's like smelling blood in the water. If I like sense him going, everything in me wants to like really make him really kill him Is there someone more likely to be able to get others to break than the other characters That's interesting. I mean, for me, U for me, sometimes the littlest things that either Danny or Tim Baltz would do would U Annihilate me like just a little a little lip movement or a little just anything with either of them where I can tell like, oh, they're totally gone And I'm fully looking at Jesse or BJ. every now and then that would um, really takeake me take me to another place. I'm pretty good though about As I say this, it's making me laugh because I'm like Well, I have had some Sometimes when I bust up, I'm pretty good about not breaking and staying in it. Is your character your favorite character on the show or do you like another character better? Judy's my favorite. I mean, it's a pretty great carotter. Yeah She's my favorite. Yeah. She has my whole heart and soul inside of her. I feel so much for her pour all of yourself into your work, but when you say you feel feel all of that for her Are you saying you're bringing thirty years of the industry into that? Just like where it is that where it is that the boys are in charge and the boys don't know anything, but the boys get to have all of the power all the time in commedy had to come in through there. Interesting. Well, she definitely was a cool place to channel unfiltered frustration and rage. I never really thought about, oh, is this at like the struggle of what it takes to become an actor or a performer or a writer in our industry I'm sure it's in the mix. I mean, anything that that I've ever felt like isn't fair, I'm sure as some in in her and You hadn't considered that before now Thating to think your entire life experience and uncaging, whatever it is you've had to hide down there because the boys are still in charge and they shouldn't be. And look at them, they're idiots. Like that all of that would get unleashed. That seemed obvious. You know, it's maybe the thing is It felt u It felt maybe Bigger than that It felt maybe mayaybe less specific than Yeah, the times the boys get things. That's in the mix for sure because, you know, we've all seen that in different places in our lives Well we haven't all seen it. Men have the privilege ofually not having to see it. Well, I guess when I say we all, I mean women, but It more more than just the specificity of that, it It was Awesome to just be able to unleash Um, Female rage and frustration in general and funny and make it uprooriously funny. like that's Yeah just make it true with no filter on it and just to express like Um I name and emotion, like intense anger, intense Horniness, intense insecurity, intense over confidence Um All of it that's in every woman Yeah, just it felt like awesome permission to just go like Let it all out. I couldn't believe as soon as I saw that show, I like how did someomeone not think of doing this before now And then the The writing grace in being able to somehow make a lot of fun of religion without necessarily insulting the people who are religious. Totally because you're just focused on how weird the family is and greed and wrong and how hard a needle that is to thread. But the moment the show appears is such a cartoon My first thought was how has someone not thought to do this before? Yeah. Well we talked a lot about that Most of us who wrote on the show had grown up Not all, but most of us had grown up in the South and most of us had grown up in a church life in some way And We definitely wanted to make the show about these specific people, literally the gemstones And not ever make fun of belief in general or believers. Everyone should believe exactly what they want to. We weren't trying to come for anyone in that way. We were trying to come for These maniacs who steal from people Yeah. And at the same time show that these ones that we're highlighting U They really do believe it's maybe a fucked up version of it And they do think they're the chosen ones and that they deserve all these things that they have that they they also are u They truly, they truly think what they think. And there And for Judy, I have to say, I'm not really sure what anyone else. all the time of their character. I think she is always doing her best even when she is really doing really bad things When you say or I've heard you say that you pour all of yourself into your work, what does that mean? Like what what are the details on pouring all of yourself into something? Well, I think Part of it is Part of it is what we were talking about earlier of just making sure that I can get to a place of letting it rip and making sure I can get to a place of M Almost I've described it like this before and I don't know if this even is articulate or it makes sense, but Almost trying to get to a place of when I'm performing to forget that I have a body and just really try to be in essence of something and not worry about technicalities of that of Do I How am I coming off and just trust that the true essence is gonna end? Well, the first thing I thought of when you said letting it rip is that letting it rip is not self conscious. Totally. That's the perfect way to say it. If I can get to a place of no self consciousness, then I know like Oh now I can find something real. And it's not only that, you must trust by now that and I can find something that I know is funny. like because ye, because I because I have full confidence in my funny. That's a wisdom that takes elders lifetimes to achieve, but has a lot of failure along the path. So when did you get there? Like when when along the path were you able to trust that doubt should be ignored and that at the core of you just not thinking about anything, no, I'm funny You know, I think Uh I think I've started getting there through through the groundlings for sure through being in the main company at Groundlings and doing M, many sketch shows and many, many improv shows. J justust reps, reps, reps on failure, right? Rs not there's success there too, but just reps on keep doing it, keepeep doing it. keepep improving. Totally failing. Eespecially with improv. I mean, the There's going to be knights that aren't as raaucous as other knights and yeah, the thing is just keepap Keep learning and keep knowing you can get better and keep knowing, you could listen better and keep knowing, you could be more present and oh, if I am more present and if I'm totally focused on the other person than that o, that gives me everything. giv That makes us both look great and really learning and feeling in your body the thing of Um and believing H tide raises all boats and If you're If your focus is outward of oh, let's just enhance this moment. Let's just be in this true moment It really makes everyone look Well, you do realize that what you're discussing is the place that people seek, you know when they pray to Mecca and when they become Buddhists or wherever God is, just wherever God is on the things that you care about and the things that you love. You're describing like the most sacred space there is for someone who makes things. That's look not to get too woo, but that's what I'm trying to to get to all the time. Yeah. And there are times when I forget and I go, o right, this isn't the most important thing Yeah, I would say through glings and through improv and through doing stuff with imppro theater. and then to say probably Probably with vice principes, I had a little bit of a convergence as far as for TV and film. going Okay, great. because I felt like they really saw me And so H haaving them see me and then knowing like, o just Keep trusting what you do. There was a cool convergence in that moment likeike we were saying, you know Sometimes that's going to all come together in the Ben diagram, sometimes it's not. but It's the only way Yeah, trusting it is the only way to get to a good part of the Ven diagram What did the groundlings teach you? It's a broad question beyond the reps Well That's definitely where I first started Um, writing my own sketches and writing characters and I think seeing shows there and seeing Oh, they lean toward char and specificity. That was a bigie to learn there. It' like, oh, the more specific I can be with a character that I'm being the more funny and true it is. So there are a lot of versions of character that are, you know, not specific enough to feel to feel real or to hit I don't know. I feel like ultimately we're all primates and we Yeah, if somebody walks like a joke and talks like a joke He maybe a laugh, but only when it's super specific. doeses it hit that like monkey part of us where we're like, o yes, true So I think I started learning that there for sure of like, o, the more real I can make something and the more just exactly dialed in and Possibly weird. People are so weird. I feel like we forget that when we I feel like movies that are completely dramatic tootally forget the fact that Even the most serious creep on the earth is having some moments in their life where they're laughing or they're embarrassing themselves or Something yeah, something cringe is happening to them or something made them laugh Yeah, I just I can't believe we still make things that attempt to be all one thing or the other. You've got me thinking of like Manson at the comedy store just that he used, you know, I don't know if it was back then or if it was around, but just in the audience. there had to be something that made even the craziest persons laugh. There's no n laughers except maybe Vladimir Putin is the only one like everyone else laughs Yeah, but yeah, even him something's making him laugh. Yeah How did the righteous gemstones change your life? Has it For sure U Wow, we Well, I mean, It was u I would say in in deepened and enhanced My creative colloaboration with Danny and some of those guys, Brandon, who runs Rough House, and Um likeike I said, Jeff Rradley, who I wrote with. I felt like I feel like It was an expansion on cool things we were thinking into I I got bestestie for life out of it in Cassidy Freeman. I I love everyone on it, which is wild That's wild to be on a show where you're like, Ohh, I really love everyone I work with. I don't I don't think that's the norm. And so I I forget I feel like it really gave me the the wherewithal to Appreciate that in the moment and to Um Just savor every delicious fun moment of that of like, oh my God to realize like this is so lucky Yeah, I think yeah, I think maybe that it gave me So much gratitude What an interesting answer to how your life was changed because you're talking about in all the meaningful ways, not any of the silly ones. L you're talking about, no, I made a friend for life. I'm working with people I love I see what it is exactly I want, how it needs to feel when it's the best And it doesn't get Hollywood corrupted because everyone who works with that group of people say that it's fun to do what you guys are doing every day. Yeah It's got its disciplines, but you get to be a child. Well, totally and it's Totally it has its disciplines. I mean, we We were doing very, very long days and It was a constant U. constant handling things and doing things and writing it. is um L and can be confusing But Yeah, none of that ever. the fact that This is this is the greatest. I mean, to be able to create the show and to embody and help create Judy. I mean, it was just like such a gift You want to get your backyard summer ready, but you don't want to break the bank? Wayfare gets it. Pning on dining alfresco or relaxing poolside Wayfair has everything you need to prep your space. Shop now and save up to seventy percent off during Wayfare's Fourth of July clearance. sccore huge deals on outdoor furniture, area rugs, and more. We're talking thousands of products for every style and budget. Plus, surprise Flash Deals July sixth. Don't wait. Shop Wayfare's Fourth of July clearance now through july sixth at wayfare dot com d ay fair, every style, every home. Do you have your favorite scenes and episodes Yeah Yeah, for sure. mean It's almost too many. It's too many to name Anytime we had a church lunch scene, that was always very, very fun and those word We always got things as written. The scripts were very written. I've had people ask me before, like Did you were you guys improvising all the time and There was improv in the mix, but we always had the scripts as written filmed and I The church lunches were usually a chance where things would kind of open up because we were all there And we could go on jags that were nowhere in the script and that was really, really fun. It sort of reminded me in seeing Taladega Kights what it is that Farrell and John C. Reilly were doing at the prayer table. I imagine that that scene took that they enjoyed doing that for about a month.. I imagine I mean ye. So you're all at the table and now everyone's not just having fun, not only does everyone love each other and sort of understand and see each other But now we we're a band that's competing on funny Totally. And so that's just a sandbox for what you do. Yeah. and then you start to feel the little moments of like, Oh, if I lob if I lob this fat pitch to him, then He's going to hit that over here. and then if I get upset at that, then we're going to go on this jag and we would just find crazy things. The whole I Tim and I getting married BJ and Judy getting married at Uh Disney Disney Wor. Um That was in the script, but the whole deal about Prince Eric being the one who married us Mickey Mouse and why didn't you guys have a legacy character? that all of that was improvised on the day and it's all it all just feel so true. That was the other major thing is None of us were ever coming from place of And let me say this, this will really make them laugh All of us were improvising from character which is the really the only kind of improvising I believe in for V fil. Who was the most generous when you talk about loobs and the selflessness and making sure that you're throwing someone else a fat one? Wow Man, I feel like everyone was so good at it. I would say maybe, maybe just because I see his I see his improv background because Tim comes from an improv background like I do All right I could I could really see him. A lobbing me some pitches sometimes. Oh, wow. so you can see the generosity as it was coming one hundred percent Nice. Yeah. Who who could make John Goodman crack? Is he I imagine he's pretty tough. now. He is pretty tough. He's not not a tough like person to be around. He's the greatest I couldn't I couldn't love that man more. Hm. I don't know. he just would get tickled. he would get tickled sometimes at weird things that would like tickle me in a script, which gave me no end of joy, knowing that John Goodman was maybe laughing at something that either made me laugh or that I wrote or Um I loved it if I could get him tickled, but he was he was pretty good about staying in character, even if he was putting in a little bit of improv. he was He was good about sting it You said a friend for life? Yeah, for sure. And all those guys did. But What is it that you're thinking of there? Like, is there anything in particular that makes the connection? I just think And maybe because we were the two the two girls on the show Uh I don't know, we just had an instant. Literally we met in LA when we were both at our physical for going off to do the show Um in some weird office building in West Hollywood And she walked in and I heard someone say her name. We were the only two people in there and we just sort of and said like, oh yeah, we're going to do the same thing. And u I don't know. It was just one of those immediate things. I've had this with a few friends in my life where You just immediately have that thought of like, oh, I know you I get okay, I get this. We're We're friends So do you do that a lot in adulthood? I've made a few friends in adulthood, but your life tends to form gets a little smaller And so has that happened a lot for you that the people you're working with instantaneous sort of, okay, we're always going to be friends because we've got a shortcut. The thing that I'm seeing from where I am is we've got a shortcut on common interest. like we like this interested in the same spaces on what it is that we do and that just can fast forward to friendship,. Yeah. I would say Yeah, it has happened for me sometimes. But the There's there's there are times when you just go like Oh Okaykay This is a long term one Um I would say I had a similar feeling with Danny. I almost immediately felt like I don't know what the deal is here. if this guy was my brother in a past life or something. and a similar thing with Cassidy, I was like Okay, well, I can get down. It's a feeling of like, I can get down with this person But what you're saying're you're saying that almost literally cosmically connected. When you go totally when you go to take this continuously back to like almost spiritual. but yeah, I would say Both of those, it was almost like a weird like almost like a weird memory of like, oh yeah, this is my friend Well, but when you say w or spiritual or all this stuff that we're talking about you're energetically feeling in places that you don't know but trust intuitively a connection that seems not of this world is what you're describing, like this is sure. Like this that I feel I am meant to be next to this person on this portion of the rise. Totally. How many people are that like that in your life? How many are you working with all of them? H No, some of them are I would say u My friend Kendra, who I knew in Texas, is that way My friend Roberto, who I knew in Texas is that way And then a couple have happened through work like Cassidy and Danny, I would say Some of my friends from the groundlings are that way. Um, Yeah, I've I've had it happen a few times. and Yeah, it's definitely not an all the time thing. And it's different than, wow, I really like this person or wow, I really get along great creatively with this person. It's yeah, it's a whole other little weird thing. of Huh. Oh, weird. I know you Yeah, I had the same thing with my friend Emily from the Ground Lagues. It's're talking about just a connection we like each other. You're saying this feels like it's from a thousand it could be from a thousand years ago. It's from I don't understand.ally. I had a similar thing with my husband When we first met, I didn't And it wasn't like Oh yeah, we were definitely married. I just I couldn't his was so with him though it was so u I don't know. I wantanna say front of mind. These other ones are almost like a rumbling in the back of my mind His was so front of mine. I was like I know this guy. he's so familiar Where do I know him from And I I didn't know him from anything. You and he should be embarrassed by how long it took you to mention him when you mentioned all of those Well, we were talking about friends only. Oh but we're also talking about you're speaking about something right now that is going to get you you know, us mocked at the idea. What is she talking about that she can feel the energies of someone intuitively she was meant to ride with in this lifetime Yeah I don't know I don't know what it is. Take us back to Texas and your upbringing, like none of these things were a dream, right? Like what is it that what is it that you were searching for when you're around the moat, for example, at Texas state wasas it Southwest Texas? And it southwest Texas State. University Y Um When you say none of these things were a dream, do you mean like the things that I'm doing now? I'm saying what did the biggest dreams look like? L what like could you have imagined what is presently did you dream this up Yeah, I wanted all. I wanted all of this and I want yeah I wanted all of this and more and I I'm still dreaming up. stuff. But yeah, I No Even what made me think there like Oh yeah, you could do this and this and this and this and this because it wasn't like I was from knowing anyone who's even an actor U But yeah, at Southwest Texas State, you're right, It was a round building in a moat. It still is. I think they have another theater building now I just I just knew I wanted to I wanted to be an actor And I didn't quite know how I was going to do that I knew I would just keep doing plays and keep Um, meeeting people at one in the morning to rehearse They're graduate. But the actor was funny. The actor was going to gonna to be doing comedy. Yeah. Findem. I was into all of it and still am into all of it I also enjoy drama. I think doing comedy and drama are almost the same thing And I think that as long as it's true and you mean it Both can Both can be delivered from just a place of truth inside of you But I don't know that I had honed in. I definitely liked being funny But I don't know that I was leaning so hard that way. Um notot until I came, not until I started doing improv. U did I sort of start to feel like Oh yeah, that's That's my way Who'd you come up with at the Groundlings and who awed you Oh, wow. so many people awed me. Well, I came up with So my My sort of, u senior class when I was in the Sunday company was Me, Mikey Day, who's on SNL known, hosts Is it Cake, and my friend Drew Drogi, who's this amazing actor and just had a a show off Broadway called Messy White Gays. So I was with two really awesome funny guys coming up and then Uh The people who I really, really up to you. I mean, the list is so The list is so long I was blown away by Jim Rash. I was blown away by Melissa McCarthy. I was blown away by Kevin Kirk Patrick, I was blown away by Mitch Silpa. I was blown away by hub Wendy McLle and Covey, I would like just I literally could just keep making a list Did it make you doubt at all? the amount of if you're being awed by everyone around, you did it create doubt or it was just you weren't, you weren't doing competition. No, it made me feel like from the second I first saw a show there, it made me feel like I have to be part of this because it was so leaning into what I already liked from growing up, which is I liked characters and I liked specific characters. And the fact that they were So obviously leaning into that and the women I was watching weren't There was no hesitation to look Insane or completely weird or you have some crazy wig on and not look anything like yourself Um Yeah I just I liked the I liked the balssiness of all of it and the complete like Yeah, fuck self consciousness. Funny is funny What was happening in your childhood though that made you gravitate toward these characters? Like wereere you a child that was always impersonating people? What were you doing in terms of how you were honing the child creativity where you're discovering that this is something that you crave? Yeah I think it's a mix of a couple of things. Part of it was growing up in Texas And They're just being a large number of characters around me. And I think part of that is just The south in general is kind of rich that way in that. So the child you is noticing I'm surrounded by weirdos. Yeah and loving it. Um And Yeah, knowing I'm surrounded by just delicious weirdos. I don't know how I knew that at a young age, but I really I really did, even if I was sort of afraid of something, I knew like Oh, this is good. I've always and this is probably because I'm from a long line of on my mom's side of starers. likeike we still have to We still have to tell my mom like Jeannie stop because she will just get lost in like wanting to stare stare at a couple at dinner and like hear their whole conversation. I'm like, I have that want too. but Unlock your eyes A long line of stairs and you're real all my cousins. But you're not thinking as a kid, you don't have an eye also for content, do you? Or do you very early on, you're seeing these people are rich. life is cartoonish and I want to embody the weirdness Stink I think I wanted to embody the weirdness from very young. L I from first grade Crazily, I had a first grade teacher at my public elementary school who was from the UK. And so she was this older woman with an accent which I still don't know why she was there or but I would go do her for my family or we had We had this wild list of My my dad's father was sick and We would go over there E every other night we would go over there and You basically be there from like after school until like ten to help take care of him And During the day though, there was this long l long list of women who would come and be like the day person and some of them lived there And becausecause then they would sort of take over the late night and bless them, but so many of them and I don't know why. I don't know if it's where we were. I don't know if it's that that you know, my mom and dad and my uncles and whoever needed to get the most affordable option. I don't know what the deal was, but they were all Wild Wild and I used to like to do them for my family. And I think maybe from early on, I realized It can kind of kind of take the pressure off. as well. Like if we're all feeling stressed out and or worried or sad It's a little dangerous to do you know, this woman who's taking care of my grandfather who you know is seemed seven feet tall and had enormous boobs and like used to like catch the rain water coming off the house to wash her hair And like let her dog eat from the inside of her mouth. She'd put ice cream in her mouth and like let the dog lick it out from the inside is all it all sounds so dark, but something in me from very little new like Oh yeah, if I do if I do them Or if I do the weird silent one with a braid down past her ass Something about it like takes some pressure off of my parents and makes us all laugh. I have to do more with those characters. It seems like this is after Paygirl because it seems like you've been doing a one woman show since whatever this age was. Mbe kind of like this is just what you're doing now in adulthood is just recreating whatever it is you were as a kid. That's why it's the playground it is for you You have all of these characters and you're instantaneously getting affection, applause, affirmation because they're all funny. And so you're allowed from very early on to embody the weird. Like you're allowed to get comfortable with weird. Yeah, for sure sh That's not normal in childhood. I think most kids are trying to fit in, right? Totally, which I I definitely was the weird was embraced early on from my family. and Definitely I had like phases at school where I was like, oh God, I'm very different than Then everyone else here Um, But I feel like performing for them and then H doing certain things and then performing at school, like literally doing a performance at school. helped me to go like, okay That's where I that's who I am and Definitely I felt like Oh Being funny is part of who I am at school And what age was that? Because there's real confidence in however it is, you there could be doubts in all sorts of other places. But to know who you are, what you want at an early age is like a great deal of the pie chart on how you get to happy. Huge. Yeah. I would say seventh grade, we had a thing called Class Day. that was basically a talent show. And, um, M and some other girls that I knew wrote a dating game parody And playing the guys and one of the girls was playing the girl voting on us and I was playing a nerd and we had written the thing and we were going to perform it. and All I just remember the feeling of auditorium full of kids dying laughing every time I would say a word or do something And I remember thinking like, Okay This is it for me. so I have to figure out how to make this a job. And I had no idea. And so then when I could, I did plays at school but those were Doing plays at school is the only outlet to figure out what I was doing Yeah. But that's what school's for, right there. everyone No one gets that feeling in college and seventh grade or anywhere else. the feeling where you totally lightning struck on this is what I must be doing. I totally no other choices. Yeah. seventh grade, That's crazy. It's no crazy It's crazy. then you can just start chasing it right then. Totally I can just keep going toward it and justust knowing like, well I'm just going to keep going toward this. I'm not this is I'm never going to stop doing this. So When you think with that faraway look on the phases of childhood where you realize, oh, I'm not like these people at all, what are you thinking of there? Like what are the Well definitely when I was really little I had a a phase where I was very shy except with my family and Then later, like U Around fifth grade or something, I feel like I went through like an existential depression that I didn't I didn't even understand. I didn't even want to say out loud. Fifth grade. Fifth grade Fifth grade existential depression. What is that like fully What is this? Am I a person I remember I used to look at Kids in my neighborhood playing and you know, doing stuff in the street or whatever. and I used to think What are they doing How do they know how to do that? How cant What is that? It was very existential. What is What is all of this? What is God, what is? What is time like And then there would be weird Fifth grade I told my mom way later and she was like Yeah, I'm still like, what? Yeah They're very, very weird and It had, um Yeah, and I used to this is way TMI. I used to like say tangible things in my head Bring me back to Earth like I had a I had this bike that I had wn for a long time. I had this this really cool It was like a BMX and freestyle bike. I didn't know how to do either of those things. I just liked the aesthetic of the bike. and were good biike. Yeah. And I' saved up and gotten it and it was a white Kuahara I don't know if you remember Well, the BMXs were the goen they were the golden bicycle of childhood. But I had like pegs on it and all these things to do tricks. I didn't know how to do any of that. I loved the aesthetic of skateboarding and BMX and U just thought All the boys who did it were really cute but I couldn't really do either thing I had this Kuahara and that was part of When I would start to feel like super floaty I would say that in my head because it was a real thing in the world or Sometimes I could like listening to the radio or the TV would make me feel like, okay Okay, I'm in the world was it was truly an existentialation thinking you're articulating in some ways that you might think you're an alien, like that or that or somewhere in the realm of how do these humans learn how to do these human things and you you You're trying to figure out if you fit with them and then realize quite quickly no one else is thinking about this so I don't. Yeah, kind of. I don't know if I had the thought of alien, but definitely I thought like Ph, they all know something I don't For sure. But you're embracing that as well, though, right? Like you're you're at seventh grade, it's so if you're saying existential depression in fifth grade. Right. No in fifth grade, but if you're spending that time in fifth grade and then in seventh grade realizing what you want to do with your life because your lightning struck, whatever's been happening in your life to that point doesn't have meaning, but now it does likeade Yeah if you know what you want, if you're being told in seventh grade that you know exactly what you want Yeah, for sure. And and thankfully my My parents were always u I don't even know the wording, but I always felt like I always felt like being true to yourself was The main thing to go for which is Ton of wild. So I knew even when it was hard that That's the main thing I should How thought you know that? I think they taught me it. But you think they taught you it or what like what? Well, I know they did. I just don't know how they did. I mean, it seems like a wonderful gift for parents to give a child life. But even when when even when there were certain like You know trends going on or if like If the people I was around at school seemed like they were being mean or like, you know, there's phases Especially as a girl certain phases where like other girls can be so mean and weird. But what you're describing is acceptance and belief, right? It's not even just support. It'sort's really many of the ingredients you'll find in love. like Yeah. but it's like What am I trying to say? I just knew like Oh, just even if this even if this feeling sucks, just keep thinking what you think Which is it's crazy that they imbued that. Well, that it's okay to be you, correct? Like as long as you know when no one is making you feel like it's okay to be you. I mean, But that explains a lot, right? If these things are supposed to be biographical and people are wondering, well, how did she become Judy Jem so well, it was allowed. It was allowed. Yeah, I was allowed in my house for sure I mean, that's that's that's that's parents doing a good job on getting I don't know that there is any sort of lottery that someone could win than parents being able to give them something that gives them their own keys to happiness. Totally Lovely talking to you you too, Dan. Play Girl is the play. It is a brave choice by her. I love that she made it. Thank you for the time. I appreciate it. Thanks, Dan