Strategies for Disclosure Flexibility

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As someone who's trained in what the science really shows about feeling happier I often find myself in the following unfortunate position T he's some well intentioned piece of happiness advice that's being shared on social media or by some self help guru And I find myself thinking, wow, that piece of advice is just totally friggaking' wrong And honestly, the expltatives I use in my head are usually worse than friickaking I'm censoring here because, you know, family podcast. Now I like to think of myself as a nice person So when I hear people getting the facts about the science of happiness wrong, I try not to go into super harsh takedown mode Even when dealing with some self proclaimed expert, someone who honestly is supposed to know better I tend to use a kinder gentler approach I'll drop a comment like, well, maybe there's another way we can think about this. Or actually, it turns out that there's a study that contradicts what you're suggesting But lately I've been starting to worry that this kinder gentler approach isn't working Lately, it feels like there's just way too much happiness misinformation out there That advice that's not getting corrected and that could be hurting people And that's why I'm so excited about this new season of the Happiness Lab Over the next few episodes, your intrepid host will drop her usual kinder gentler approach And we'll begin just straight up calling out bad happiness advice And while I promise to withhold the profanities that I'm using inside my head As I said, family podcast. I do need to warn you The takedowns you're about to hear over the next few episodes are going to be buyer I'm really hoping my producers can throw in some sort of flaming sounds there So yes, just in time for summer, the Happiness Lab brings you a whole season of Laoruri's Happiness Hot Takes There we go, nice Okay, so are you ready for happppiness hot takeake number one? Well, it involves a tendency we hear about a lot these days, oversharing Depending on how old you are, you may refer to this tendency as spilling your guts, airing your dirty laundry, trauma dumping, letting it all hang out, putting it on blast, or with just three simple letters, TMI too much information The advice we usually hear about TMI is simply not to do it that it's cringe worthy, that it demonstrates social ignorance, that when it comes to overly personal information, save it for your therapist because less is usually more The first hot take of our new season is that all this advice is wrong Because as we'll see in this episode, the science shows that healthy social connection requires more TMI than our lying minds think. We'll also learn that revealing a bit more than is necessary has lots of benefits that we don't expect And so, here is happainess hot take number one Overssharing is a good thing, and we should be doing it far more often Fs are constantly telling us what to do to be happy Our minds are wrong What if our minds are lying to us, leading us away from what will really make us happy? The good news is that understanding the science of the mind can point us all back in the right direction You're listening to the Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos When we think of oversharing, we cringe a little bit, right? This is behavioral scientist and Harvard Business School professor, Leslie John. Where my mind immediately goes is social media. someomeone who's blabbing about all of their personal struggles unfiltered or You know, we've seen so many examples of these someone's venting about their boss and then they get fired based on what they posted. I think we think a lot about the digital context. There's all kinds of these horror stories of people who have said things that they really shouldn't have said and suffered really negative consequences for it. We have a really negative connotation about it because of that Even the term oversharing sounds pejorative It's lumped in with words like overveating, overthinking, overreacting as opposed to more positive words like overabundance or overjoyed In fact, when Webster's dictionary chose oversharing as their new word of the year when social media was on their rise back in two thousand eight They defined it as the act of divulging inappropriate amounts of personal information. Let's forget about the social media version of oversharing for just a second. You'reunt Judy's long diatribes on Facebook influencer who broadcasts their dates on Instagram liive becausecause research shows that when it comes to real people in real life, Osharing is due for a rebrand In fact, Leslie says that when it comes to revealing a bit more than is strictly necessary, she's a huge fan I am a proud card carrying oversharer. Again and again, I found that even those of us who tend to be revealally, we could benefit from sharing a little more a lot of the time. Leslie has long had a knack for sharing what's on her mind. Even when doing so might not be the most strategic option Take for example, what she was willing to share with a group of complete strangers at an academic conference back when she was a junior professor. I'm sitting there with mostly senior scholars, and someone had the great idea of saying, let's go around the circle and share our most embarrassing story And so like O junior people were like, oh, there was a typo in my abstract you know, these humble bregs I went for it and I told my actually most embarrassing story ever, which entailed me peeing on stage in college. I was in a play and I was laughing so hard in my scene that I being on stage. So that is my most embarrassing story. and now I'm telling it to you again and I don't regret it, or take another tendency of oversharers, what Leslie refers to as the unfiltered blurt She unleashed one of these blurts during the job interview for her current position at Harvard At the time, Leslie was being questioned by a group of intimidating senior faculty members. And I was super nervous. And when I'm nervous, especially I kind of say stupid things. And one of the faculty members, he looked at my resume, he could sense that I was uncomfortable, and so he was trying valiantly to make me feel comfortable The interviewer noticed in Leslie's resume that she had trained as a ballet dancer So he decided to ask her about that using a joke to break the tension. And he said, o, you know I was a ballet dancer too. A quick glimpse at this faculty member's larger than average midsection made the punchline obvious The other faculty interviewers gave a knowing smile. But Leslie, ever the card carrying oversharer, decided to take the joke one unfortunate step further. And in that moment, I just sat still, looked him up and down, cocked my head and said clearly One word, I was like one word, poof, that's it. my dream job gone Was her dream job gone Leslie's unfiltered blur was awkward. but it did kind of demonstrate her confidence. And there's even research on this phenomenon, I didn't know it at the time, but There's research showing that when Among those who are qualified for the job If you show a little bit of yourself in an interview, which for me was a little bit of my sassy sideize, it actually can enhance your likelihood of getting the job And in this particular case, that's exactly what happened Leslie would later learn that she wound up getting her current Harvard position, not in spite of that unfiltered blur, but because of it They said to me, you know, when you sass them like that, we thought you'll fit right in here. And he became a super close mentor of mine. He just retired and He would love to regale new job candidates about the story. There was like our origin story.'s like, when Leslie did that, she just. It turns out that there's lots of research behind examples like these which is why Leslie has become such an advocate of putting it all out there She's even written an entire book championing the practice. It's called revealing, the underrated power of oversharing Leslie opens her book by highlighting a communicative predicament that we often find ourselves in whether that's at work or in our friendships, or while chatting with our romantic partners We wind up facing what social psychologists call a disclosure dilemma Disclosure dilemma is that really fraught feeling of to share or not to share Let's say you just got a big raise at work. Do you tell your friend the good news so she can help you celebrate, or do you keep it to yourself so that your friend doesn't feel bad about her own finances Perhaps you've recently been diagnosed with ADHD Do you share that new diagnosis with your boss and coworkers so they can help you get the accommodations you need Or do you keep things private to avoid judgment about your disability Or imagine you and your partner are having a heart to heart about your relationship. Do you share that you've been feeling bored on your date nights Or do you withhold that information to protect your spouse's feelings In these and other disclosure dilemmas, there are two possible ways you could get things wrong You could wind up sharing too much information or you could wind up sharing too little In theory, we should be worried about both of these possible errors But Leslie finds, we tend to think only about the former mistake. We're so preoccupied with TMI, that is real and valid, We don't even have a word until now. To describe the other end, the word Leslie's referring to is an acronym that she's been trying to popularize. TLI. too little information. Leslie's research has found that TLI can be more harmful than we realize As she eloquently put it in her book Things you don't say can quietly reshape your life. Like when your corkers can't help you with your newly diagnosed disability, because you never told them you were struggling or when a friendship starts to fade because you never disclosed what was really going on in your life or when your marriage accumulates more and more tiny resentments over time becausecause your partner keeps failing to bring up the small things that bug them. Oh my gosh, the risks of undersharing of TLI are so much worse than those of oversharing. There's even one kind of TLI that studies show can be deadly Failing to disclose embarrassing information to your doctor What's the percentage of patients who self report not revealing some medically critical piece of information to their physicians eighty percent of patients eighty percent I was so shocked when I first read that finding that I mentioned it to a doctor friend of mine He told me that in just the past week He'd had a case of a patient who failed to mention drinking alcohol the night before big surgery You wind up having a heart attack on the operating table Yikes Th these TLI findings raise an important question. do we so often fail to reveal stuff to other people Eespecially when doing so could benefit us Leslie thinks this tendency stems from a cognitive error known as the omission bias Brains tend to notice actions, the things we say are due, but not acts of omission, the things we fail to say or fail to do The omission bias means we tend not to notice the consequences of not revealing something That means we calculate the pros and cons of disclosure dilemmas all wrong Suppose you have ADHD and you're wondering whether you should talk to your boss to potentially get accommodations, right? There's risk and then there r's a reward. And What people fixate on are the risks of revealing So they'll say, I'll be discriminated against. It will be a really difficult conversation. And those are super valid, the risks of revealing But the problem is that they stop at that You have to look at both sides. You have to look at the risks of revealing and the benefits of revealing. You also have to look at the risks of holding back and the benefits of holding back. You need to do a full four quadrant reckoning to really make a good decision. and yet when we are left to our own devices, we just focus on the one thing Leslie has found that the omission bias is especially common when people are deciding whether to share something negative. In one of my favorite of her experiments, she had her participants play a dating game Subjects were asked to interview two hypothetical suitors, and to decide which of the two people they'd rather date. Let's pretend that you're a subject in this study You meet your two suitors, they both seem fine, but then you begin asking them some very personal questions Eventually, you get to a tough one You nervously look towards suitor number one and ask, Have you ever had an STD And they say You know, I've had so many I can't even count. They've had a lot of all the SDDs The other person You ask them the same question, they say I'm not answering that question they refuse to answer And so who would you rather date the revealer that reveals very unsavory things or the hider who refuses? And again and again, we found that people would rather date person who is the revealer, even if it's really negative things. Even with bad news, we prefer it when people just tell it to us straight when they give us TMI rather than TLI The problem, Leslie finds in her work is that we don't seem to realize this when we're on the other side of that disclosure dilemma when we're in the position of the potential revealer rather than the revealee So we say, imagine you failed some courses in college and your new employer is asking you whether you've ever failed any courses. wouldould you opt out of answering or would you come clean And they say I would opt out of answering for sure That is the wrong choice, right? So our intuitions are often wrong But our intuitions aren't just wrong when it comes to the costs of TLI We also fail to see the benefits that can come from revealing more information than is strictly necessary When we return from the break, we'll learn more about all the unexpected benefits of a little TMI The happappiness Lab will'll be back in a moment I've been thinking about my spaces lately And I've realized just how much thoughtful design can change the feel of my everyday routines. But I honestly never expected a toilet to be part of that conversation until I experienced the Kohler Smart Toilet collection Kohler has been elevating bathroom design since eighteen seventy three And you can really feel that legacy in the way their products are designed the Koler Vail smmart toilet That design immediately stands out It's modern, sleek, almost like a functional work of art. It just makes your entire bathroom experience feel more elevated. 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That's QuinCE d. com slash happppiness for free shipping and three hundred and sixty five day returns Qince. com slash happppiness This message is in partnership with Symbple Mills On our show, we talk a lot about how small choices can have a big impact on your well beinging And one choice that often gets overlooked The snacks you reach for during the day It might sound simple, but the right snack can help you feel energized and focused Two things that make sticking to healthy habits so much easier When your body feels good, your mind follows That's why I feel good talking about Simple Mill's almond fllour crackers They are made with real nutrient rich ingredients like almond flour, sunflower seeds, and flax seeds And the bonus These crackers have a unique crunchy texture They're absolutely delicious, and I promise they'll make you look forward to snack time We all know that unhealthy snacking can derail even the best intentions. 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Yes, spelled with three Ms. These light airy, poppable cheese crackers are loaded with real vegetables, so you get that quick crunch without compromising your energy It's a mindful choice that feels good and tastes great The bottom line, habits don't happen in isolation They're supported by the environment you create and the choices you make along the way When you pick snacks that help you feel good, physically and mentally, you're setting yourself up for success And success should taste good. Find simple mills at your local grocery store There's always something you want to get better at. For me this summer, it's all about learning more about music If you're a fan of the Happiness Lab, you know that I love my sing alongs But these days I've been thinking about learning how to DJ so that I can supplement that. And that's why I turned to masterclass. With masterclass, no matter what you're interested in, you can find a class taught by someone who's actually the best in the world at that thing When I first learned how to DJ, I found classes by amazing teachers like Quest Love And masterclass fits into my busy professor life I love their short lessons, which I can watch on my phone or on my TV And with audio mode, Masterclass can turn your commute or workout into a classroom Masterclass keeps adding new classes, so there's never been a better time to get in Right now, as a listener of this show, you get at least fifteen percent off any annual membership. at masterclass d. com slash Laurry fifteen percent off at masterclass. com slash Lorry to masterclass. com slash Lauri to see the latest offer It's november two thousand nine, and a middle aged Australian woman is about to go viral then caregiver Bronnie Ware was working as a live in, palliative care nurse spepending twelve hour shifts working closely with terminally ill patients These long shifts meant that Bronnie had lots of time to chat with her dying clients Many of whom seem to relish the chance to reflect openly about their lives Often, they admitted to her for the very first time As patients got closer to the end, they didn't seem to carry the usual worries about oversharing. Bronnie was struck both by how vulnerable her patients were willing to get during these end of life conversations, and by the similarities across their observations She thought it'd be powerful to share her clients' reflections publicly So she put together a short blog post entitled Regrets of the Dying That online essay exploded. Within months it was shared millions and millions of times and quickly turned into a book called The Top fiveive Regrets of the Dying. Bronnie's bestseller presented a list of five things that her dying patients wished they'd done differently to feel happier And right smack in the middle of that list is a regret that oversharing aficionado, Leslie John, reflects on a lot Regret number three is I wish I had shared my feelings more. It's a disclosure regret, right? So it's like these people dying That's what they regret. I mean, that that is such wisdom Leslie has devoted her career towards helping people to avoid this big regret publicizing the many benefits of oversharing particularly when it's done face to face with real people in real life. And Leslie says that the first benefit you get from this type of oversharing is a cognitive one of talking to another person can help you make sense of your inner thoughts and feelings the process of taking this stuff that's swirling around in your brain and putting words on it helps you to cope. because one It helps you make sense of the things that are bothering you. But when you talk about what's on your mind you naturally impose a story structure on it. We're natural storytellers and it doesn't have to be a happy ending, but there's some kind of structure and that structure takes away the uncertainty of how you're feeling. And we all know that uncertainty is a huge cause of anxiety. And so it makes it more concrete, which really helps to alleviate stress. What I love about this too is you don't have to try. you don't have to come up with a story. You don't have to be make sense of this. You just have to literally put what's in your mind into words. The other thing, of course, is the actual affect labeling component Pect labeling is a fancy psychologist term for the act of choosing a specific word to describe your feelings. When we reveal during a disclosure dilemma, we wind up selecting specific words to explain our emotions. Let's say you've finally decided to have that heart to heart with your partner, about why your date nights have felt less exciting lately As you dive into that conversation, you'll naturally get more specific about what exactly you've been experiencing on those date nights whether you've started to find them boring or irritating or disappointing or unpleasant Or say that you're telling a friend about an awful moment at work Talking openly about that incident can help you determine whether you felt disregarded or frustrated or ashamed or overwhelmed And studies find that knowing the precise feeling you're going through can help you regulate that feeling more effectively. When you do this, it's like becoming the CEO of your feelings because you're in control. You can name them and when you can name them, that's comforting. So that's the first benefit of oversharing. It helps you think more precisely about what you're feeling Benefit number two of TMI is simple It just feels good In one experiment, participants were asked to disclose information about themselves while sitting inside an FMRI brain scanner The researchers found that revealing personal information activated participants reward networks The very same brain regions that would fire, if you won a bunch of money, ate something delicious or took cocaine So relative to people who did not get to talk about themselves, those who got to answer questions about themselves literally found it more pleasurable. And Leslie says there's an evolutionary logic to why revealing feels so good We experience acts of TMI positively because they connect us with other people The way sharing increases connection fundamentally is that it increases trust When you reveal something sensitive that causes the other person to trust you, why? because That's a social risk. If I tell you something sensitive about myself, I am relinquishing control to the universe and implicitly saying I trust you because I'm doing it. I wouldn't be doing it if I didn't trust you, right And that in and of itself causes you who trust me back But Leslie has found that we often miss opportunities for building that happiness boosting trust She finds that we simply don't notice the little moments in which we could disclose something about ourselves to another person. So let's take a banal day in the life of me. I wake up in the morning, I roll over in bed, I say Good morning, Collie. My hobby What I don't say is I slept like crap When I don't sleep well, I can't regulate my emotions. I don't say any of that We get to the bathroom, we're brushing our teeth What I think to myself is, you know, I feel older than I thought I would at this age. I think these things I don't say them. We go down to the kitchen, the kids are frolicking. My husband starts packing their lunch.'s like What do you think they want for snack? I say, I don't know. another decision. stop it. Thats said, but what I don't say is I need a hug I'm exhausted. I need some grace today. I have a big presentation coming up. I don't say any of that So we're not even at breakfast yet I mean I could go on and on. That's a lot of tiny missed moments for disclosure. And Leslie thinks each of them has an opportunity cost It's not that we should say all of the things that are on our mind. You don't want that, I don't want that I think that we should consider saying more of these things because I think if we did I know that our lives would be better for it being known for who you really are That's the source of love and closeness, right Oftentimes what feels like over communicating is just communicating. My husband can't read what's on my mind. I need to tell him my needs. And then he's amazing, but he can't read my mind. What feels like overcunicating is just communicating. what feels like oversharing is just sharing I love Leslie's point here Often what feels like oversharing is just sharing Often what our minds think of as too much information is just information If that's the case, how do we get over our fears about revealing How do we stop missing out on all these little opportunities for connection and start opening up more To find out, I decided to tag in a friend I'm Nick Epp. I'm a professor behioralcience at the University of Chicagoou School of Business and I just finish a book titled Aittle More Social Nick is one of my favorite psychologists on the planet, which is one of the reasons he appears so often as a guest on the happappiness Lab And not to drop any spoilers about this upcoming season, but Nick will be joining me for a lot of my upcoming happappiness hot takes Why? Because Nick's entire research program is pretty much one big happiness hot take. He's discovered that we consistently misunderstand how social connection works. whether we're giving a compliment or asking for help, or expressing our gratitude Or yes, sharing something that seems a little TMI, our minds assume that revealing will feel cringe wororthy and awkward But Nick finds time and again that these assumptions are wrong. When people talk about where their expectations come from, why they think it's going to be awkward, they almost always We'll talk about vulnerability. I'm exposing something meaningful about myself. They could laugh at me They could make fun of me. They could think poorly of me They just tend not to. How do we start to rewire these mistaken expectations so that we can share more deeply Nick says the first step is to remember that our minds tend to focus on the wrong stuff during a disclosure dilemma. When you reveal something meaningful about yourself or even something potentially negative, when you share that with another person, you're thinking a lot about the content what it is that you share We also think a lot about the competence of that content whether what we've just shared could be perceived badly by another person If I tell my colleague that I'm feeling overwhelmed at work I think I think I'm bad at my job r if I tell my friend about a parenting slip up Are they gonna to view me as a bad mom? But this focus on what's being shared means that we often miss the how of sharing being open with another person makes that person feel Just as Leslie John mentioned earlier, it all comes down to the importance of emotional safety. It's warmth, right? And what we really care about when we're interacting with other people is warm I want to know, can I trust you or not? Are you going to be a friend? to me or not And when somebody opens up to you and share something. they're telling you I trust you I'm going to be a friend to you. How do we judge somebody who opens up to us who seems trustworthy and kind Charitably is the answer has seen this pattern in study after study In one experiment, Nick asked a group of subjects to write a vulnerable note that expressed how grateful they felt about another person He found that participants significantly overestimated how much the recipient would judge how well their gratitude note was written while at the same time significantly underestimating how the note's warmth would make the recipient feel In another study, Nick's team asked subjects to share three genuine compliments with a friend or as they phrased it positive things you have noticed, but have not, for whatever reason, had a chance to compliment your friend on yet. Participants were told that their friend would read the compliments and fill out a short survey about them They were then asked to estimate how positively the recipient would react Nick found that subjects significantly underestimated how happy their friend would be N because they worried too much about how competent their compliment sounded how articulate it came across and how well worded it was So that's the first thing. Nick says we need to remember when we're feeling pessimistic about how a disclosure will go The people we open up to are unlikely to judge us harshly because they're paying attention to our warmth, not our competence But Nick says there's a second thing that we need to remember if we're feeling scared to share with another person probably haven't given ourselves nearly enough opportunities to learn the benefits of sharing And that's because disclosure dilemmas tend to trap us in what researchers have called an unkind learning environment Find learning environment is one where I have a belief, I go out and I test it and I find out if I'm wrong, right? So I think I'm going to get an A on this test, I take the test, I find out if I'm right or wrong an unkind learning environment is one where My beliefs dictate the kind of feedback I get So if I believe I'm going to do poorly on a test I might not take the test and then I wouldn't actually learn whether my belief was right or wrong And the problem in social life is we're often in an unkind learning environment where our beliefs do dictate the feedback we get. So if I think talking with you is going to be fun and enjoyable, I'll try it And I'll find out whether I'm right or not If I think talking with you is going to be unpleasant I won't talk with you and I'll never find out I'm wrong Our brands can only learn from experience when they get the experiences they need to actually learn. Unfortunately, our poor brains don't get all that much experience with the consequences of TMI because we're often too scared to try it Because of this, we're not able to update our expectations about oversharing And that means that whenever a disclosure dilemma comes along We're stuck with that pessimistic voice in our head The one that's constantly screaming, OMG, TMI. No. That avoidance voice get stronger right before you're about to do a thing. That's what chickening out is all about And the cringe is screaming at you. The cringes Yeah, yeah, in both ears, right? At a distance it's just one ear, right? You got the angel on the one side and the cringe on the other. But when you're about to do the thing, all you got is cringe. That's it. It's up to eleven. bothoth ears. But that's the part that often makes us deviate when we shouldn't And you can quiet that cringe voice withith a lot of practice? But Nick admits that even an expert like him still hears that avoidance voice on rare occasions In fact, I was really touched by a sweet story he shared in his new book. about an incident in which his own cringe voice got particularly loud Tell me about the anniversary present you gave your way. Oh my gosh. Um So my wife Jen and I have been married this as we're talking right now, this is our thirtieth year twenty five together a photo montage I can't believe you're Skim I wrote I was cringy in the book. I know, but It's worse even time I talked about how Chis. I know. I know, but I know, I know, I know. But you feel it, right? Yeah. And so if you're just listening to me, I'm kind of a big sort of guy. I was a college football player And you know being sensitive is not necessarily something I'm always known for, perhaps. But I put together this photo montage of us togetherogher over the last twenty five years and one of my favorite songs is from Ben Folds titled The Luckiest, which I think is the song that encapsulates best how I feel about my wife I met her when I was seventeen years old. opposeed her when I was twenty one How I came to meet this amazing human being when I was seventeen years old is just the most fortunate of luck I could have ever had. So I sung the luckiest to this montage. I'm not a great singer It was so cringey to do it because I was focused on how awkward I sounded, how terrible I sounded. When I played it again she was in tears And part of my brain knew that, like part of my brain knew that she would see The love that I was trying to communicate and express to her in this, she would feel that But even though Nick is an expert on the power of vulnerability The other part of his brain was still screaming, TMI, you suck. She's gonna hate it. Stop first time I'd ever sung my wife. And so The avoidance of voice was still really, really strong And I had to ignore it, I had to push past it. Nick says that pushing past the avoidance voice is easier when you remember what psychologist Leslie John explained earlier that the most meaningful acts of sharing often feel like oversharing. But decades of research demonstrate that your recipient is not going to judge you nearly as harshly as you assume Remembering these findings gave Nick the evidence based courage he needed to push through his cringe voice and serenade his wife And in Nick' case going a little TMI worked out nicely She loved it because it signified warmth. It wasn't competence. She didn'tpect me to be a great singer. It was signifying warmth After twenty five years she knew. She kind of knew. She kind of knew What can we do to shut off that cringe voice more often advice is to collect more of our own data on the benefits of TMI to create our own kind learning environments evenven though the act of doing so may feel painfully awkward in the moment The fears you have about how these conversations will go are off, right How do you calibrate those, you calibrate those with experience tryrying, rununning the experiment yourself But my hope is that If you have practicice enough, you will have another voice too. and that other voice is telling you, no, it'll be okay You can sing the Benfold song to your wife. And she will love Even even though you sound horrible She will still love it But wait, you might be thinking, It's one thing to overcome your worries about oversharing when you're singing on your twenty fifth anniversary. But what about embarrassing moments of TMI at work or during a job interview or when you're about totally humiliate yourself in front of someone who hasn't vowed to love you through sickness and health. When we get back from the break, oversharing expert Leslie John will help us tackle when to choose TMI in these higher stakes disclosure dilemmas And when it might be worth holding things back We'll hear her tips for handling the big boss levels of oversharing challenges when the H happappiness Lab returns in a moment I've been thinking about my spaces lately And I've realized just how much thoughtful design can change the feel of my everyday routines. But I honestly never expected a toilet to be part of that conversation. until I experienced the Kohlermart tooilet collection Kohler has been elevating bathroom design since eighteen seventy three And you can really feel that legacy in the way their products are designed. the Koler Vail smmart toilet design immediately stands out It's modern, sleek, almost like a functional work of art It just makes your entire bathroom experience feel more elevated It's a reminder that the right design can make everyday moments feel cleaner, more comfortable, and more intentional Kohler has been redefining bathroom design for more than one hundred and fifty years And their smart toilets really show how design and innovation can transform even the most routine parts of life Design changes everything And Kolar smart toilets are a really great example of that. experxience the difference of Koler smart toilets Find more at Kohler. com As the weather changes, I've been thinking more and more about my wardrobe And these days, I've been trying to get more intentional about what's in my closet I want getting dressed to feel simpler So I've been leaning into pieces that feel effortless and comfortable but still look put together been obsessed with Quince's one hundred percent organic cotton poplin tiered Maxie dress It's got a fit that feels sleek. but it's still super comfortable. And I couldn't believe how great the price was Quince makes it easy to refresh your everyday wardrobe this spring, with pieces that feel as good as they look