Googie Renee and Second Chance Theater

We gather here tonight to bring women back to their rightful place. The Testaments, a new Hulu original series from the executive producers of the Handmaid's Tale. It's easier to accept a story than believe that the people around you are monsters. The battle is n't over. There comes a time when you have to take action, when you have to choose your own destiny . Watch the new Hulu original series, The Testaments, streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply. Hey, uh very honored. We're nominated for a Webby Award. What's the what's the category? It is uh best co-hosts. Here's who we're up against. Um Smartless? No. Boo. Sibling Rivalry, which is Bob the Drag Queen, who's been on my show. Very funny. That one's fucking great. Monet Exchange. Sorry, I'm I want to make sure I get that right. Uh the Pivot, the Pivot Podcast. Oh, that one's also great. New Heights with Travis and Jason Kelsey? That's even better. We're fucked How do they decide the winner? Is it is it voters or is it voters? It's voters. Like Quaid's could go in there and quump the bump? Yeah. Oh great. Well then yeah, so so Quaid. You mean Quaid's could just go there now and vote for it? Yeah. Oh the Jeff's saying he'll put the link in the show notes, but go and uh make sure we win because there's a huge cash prize. We all get Ferraris . Alright, uh now that we've established that, uh Take it away, opening credits. The Lonely Island . It's a smart podcast. Hey everybody, welcome to the Lonely Island and South Myers Podcast. And this is a first. I believe all four of us, which really reflects how much we care about this podcast, are coming to you from hotel rooms. Yeah. Every single one of us. Every single one of us has got some travel gear. This will reflect badly on the fact that I will still have the worst sound and now have no excuse at all. You've had no excuse for the last three sessions now. We all brought our mics. Embarrassing. Well, it's the same excuse. It wasn't like I was gonna fly home and get it. I'm still in the same place I was last week. Sure. So all I brought was this. I know you keep saying that. I well I heard you. I still can't go home. Well uh Andy you have uh wall art behind you that we've seen now uh multiple times yeah which is just peak depressing hotel art. He's in a home. I'm in a rental home, so it's even more insulting. Oh no. Well then it's great art. Oh yeah. I mean I love it. I love it. Um What if I was like this is my house, Seth? Well, 'cause I was safe first. They say we're in hotels. O cofurse it's hard to tell if you're even listening. I'm not. I'm doing um strands. Oh, you're doing strands. Oh, good. Good. Tell us that you do. You know what? I think the other thing, I like when you also talk about what ostensibly you're supposed to love, which is New York Times games, and it they also seem to bum you out as much as this podcast. I think people are just finding out the hard way that you're just a malcontent. I guess I'm just wondering why they didn't accept gurgly. Wait, that is weird. The word gurgly is a word. I was pretty shocked about gurgly as well. Like what the fuck in Sam fuck. I got burglary and then miss burglar. So you know I'm not having the best day. Oh wow. That's embarrassing. Hey, I have a bunch of new uh slang for the pod, which is really nice that our listeners provide us with uh slang . When all four of us are on the pod, it's called a quaddo, but spelled with a D, not a T. Yeah, because the Quad is an effect. Yeah, so this is officially a Quado. Ah, sweet. But not that kind of Quado. Not Quado from Total Recall. It's like, oh, four. Yeah, it's almost a Quado. The new T. Almost Quato. What you cooking, Quato? You got that mac and cheese cooking, baby? My wife just met with Cueto, the real Cueto. So what's up, Cueto? Yeah. What's up, Cueto? She said that he was great. My wife is also successful . My wife's been meeting with Quato all the time, but they're they don't have any business together. I don't understand what's going on. So your wife and Quato are both successful people, but you're saying that has nothing to do their success has nothing to do with the meeting. No, they have no business together. I can't figure it out, but they keep going out to to dinners and it's probably fine. And this is you say and you say is it about business? And she just says she del ivers it exactly like that. She says, We have no business together, and then just closes the door. Nope. Yep. Right. Oh . And he swings by and he's like, Hey man, thanks for being so cool about all this. Thanks for still shouting me out on the pod, you know, all things considered. I like mac and cheese. She's coming home with like mac and cheese stains on her shirt . Like just from pants platter. Pants splatter. Mac and cheese. I don't know what's happening. Let's just say he left it on a bit too long because other things uh uh came about. Keys in the laundry room like mac and cheese powder? How did this get in her pocket? Again. Keep finding yeah, I keep finding it in her in her clothes. Oh no. Slowly raising it to sniff. Then Yeah, that's mac and cheese powder, there's no doubt about it. This is craft. Quato . So he tasted like a gecko would. Like that seemed like a real lizard lick. Oh, full-on lizard lizard lick, yeah. Yeah. That's the only way you can know for sure that it's mac and craft mac and cheese powder. We're not sponsored by them. Not yet. FUGE ST. So a couple updates. Jeff interrupted a hot bit to fucking do technical shit, and in the meantime, Seth pounded a whole beer. No, but it's uh it's a nab. Oh I'm doing vacation. I'm nabbing it on vacation. Are you nabbing it? I'm nabbing it. That's a perfect strands. It's a perfect strands. Oh yeah, perfect strands. Spangram first . I'm hoping to go to a perfect stront in like two hours. Ooh, a perfect str own's perfect. Andy, you're have you heard that we bought the domain name I want strants ? You did not. We did. You can go to it right now, it redirects to late night with Seth Myers as of now. But we're gonna just start listing all the restaurants that we mentioned on the butt. Why doesn't it redirect to Digman on Netflix? Oh well 'cause we assumed you'd redirect us there . I mean Speaking of uh have you had to have you had to quulp? Uh quulp in case you're wondering is another uh portmanteau that's been pitched by uh the Quaid Army. A quulp is when you have to gulp a member of the Quaid Army 'cause they've watched Dig. Oh, so it's like a quump but it involves the gulps. Yeah, it's a Quaid gulp. It's a quulp. It's a Quaid gulp that results in a quump. Right. Unless they're being dishonest, but I would never know 'cause I'm taking them all at their word. Yeah. But yeah, I've gulped several several quays out on the street. Oh you have? So it's immediately Seth, 'cause I was doing that before. You know what I mean? Oh. Good joke. That's like I'm getting paid to do my pastime. Thanks . By the way, for over your dead body, I'll quote a uh quote a bunch of quads. Bro, stay in your lane. Oh, sorry. Somebody said look looking forward uh respect when Yorm's movie comes out looking forward to variety headline, Quaid Army quumps dead body to Bafo box office. So there's I would like reading that. Yeah, I hope so. Good luck to all of us. Oh, this is bad. Somebody somebody wrote in that that it turns out the uh the lyrics to the Bielen Brothers song was their winter soldier code words. Oh no. It's in there a bunch. They got activated like a hundred times. Oh hey, Yorm. I missed it and I feel like Keith missed it too. But uh in the re-listen I heard it. What you said at one point that you're firing on all cylinder. Oh, oh yeah, that was funny, right? Yeah, yeah, I like that. Thanks. That's a good that's a good your mism for me. Thank you. Seth. Just for the listeners, when we're on Zoom, you know Zoom sometimes chooses who you can hear and who you can't if everybody talks over each other. So that's why it never happens. Nop people sometimes we just don't hear each other. No crosstalk. Kiv two people wrote in with a similar comment. I'm falling in love with Akiva's new catchphrase. That short didn't suck as much as I thought it did . Oh we, might get to say that again today. How wonderful. Yeah, the other one uh similar sentiment. A kiva before every short. Alright, let's begin this garbage dog shit short afterwards. I really enjoyed that. That's fair. Yeah, he takes you on a journey. It's a lot like what it's like working with him, honestly. But that I mean, don't you feel like that's been one of the one of the secret bonuses of this endeavor so far, Keith, is you finding out that the ones that you were feeling shame about Yeah, I feel like there's a lesson to be learned, but I'm not sure what it is yet. And that's part of the journey here. Yeah. Maybe you're too hard on yourself. Yeah. That's Kiva's arc. Have you heard about um I'm gonna just fully assume you haven't listened, Andy. Only 'cause you're busy. I know you love us, but there's a pitch for a new Alf show that you star in. Have you heard about it? No, but I'm all ears. You land on Mel Mac and so you're the Alf. You like live with a family of Alf. Me as myself. Yeah. Okay. But like you're the elf and uh You're the only human that lives now with a family of elves. We were calling it half, like human alien life. Human alien life. Half is gonna be fun because then of course everybody's's gonna think it called half and we're gonna be like no no no it's no it's not no it's half it's half yeah makes so much sense for us it'll have periods between each letter no it's not called half why would it be called half. Could the title of the show be half parenthetical pronounced? I think rhymes with elf. Parenthetical rhymes with rhymes with alf. I liked not I was pitching not alf that they keep calling you not al elf. Notf. Yeah, that's made better. Oh yeah, that's a okay, great. That's a nice picture from the subreddit that Jeff just gave us. It's an entire family of elfs. They even made Oh yeah. Look at the picture. Yeah. One has long hair. Oh wow. And so so sorry, can I ask some follow-up questions? Yeah, of course . That's a really nice Nalf poster, guys. We have a Nalth poser poster. Not a Nalf poser. That's somebody who claims they came up with this idea. Oh, that's a really good. Nalf. Nalf poster will be. So sorry. Now am I playing myself or am I a character? How do you want to do it? We're the producers, so what do you want? Well what do you guys think? What do you want to work? I think you're a character. I think you should play the character dad . Like you're a stick in the mud and all the elfs are like, you know. So you're playing against type. Yeah, all the elfs are elf like. They're all as somebody on here said, like laissez faire kind of like drinking beer and you're the one they're loose with the rules. You're the center of the T V show, but you're like ironing and doing dishes and you're like Well, nobody in this owl family puts away any dishes. So I'm kinda like Bateman unarrested. Yes. Yeah, you're you're totally frustrated. Frustrated by how crazy all the alfs are. Can the mom be called Mal f? The dad could be Dalf, right? So like mom elf, dad elf. We went through this, you're in last week. They don't consider themselves alfs because Yeah, they just have normal names like Gordon. Oh right. So their their names are like Sydney and Kyle and they're not aliens to themselves. And also their pets on their planet are burritos. Okay. So that they constantly have to tell you not to eat the burrito? I can roll with that, yeah. Are they eating cats for every meal and their pets are burritos? Yeah. Okay, I see. We assume. A lot of cat meat. Yeah. Now do you think they eat cat for every meal or is that like having a uh filet mignon every meal? Is it like a fill-I feel like that's like lobster? Yeah, you wouldn't. Yeah, I don't right. It's like it's it's Dalf's birthday, time for a a roast cat. Yeah. Maybe that you ended up there because it turns out the Melmachicans have been like using a secret like ray to steal cats. And they like they zip you up one day in one of their cat holes. Okay. And so I don't know I like everything you're saying is in the show. This is good. You've just got my mind racing right now, just thinking of a hundred possibilities. One more question. Yeah. Do I talk like Alf or do they all talk like Alf and I talk like this? I think you talk like this. I talk like this. I think you talk like the dad from Alff, the original El. Yorm, that's a tall order. Yeah. You love doing that voice. You love that. I know, but like, as soon as I do it, everyone's gonna be like, this guy's smoking. Oh no. We cut that out. We cut that out. Guys, look, I'll just say something, because I feel like we don't have to cut this out. We talked a little bit at post Alf, the actor Max Wright had a trickier time. And uh and then we felt we made some edits. We made a couple edits and I a trickier time. Yeah tricky did have a tricky time. And again Yes, trickier time and and we can bleep this, but the trickier time entailed smoking having like in a c I mean I think there probably will be many bleeps. When we when we and then see bleep every other word is a bleep Smoking bleep in a bleep out. Did we just say like Google the dad from Alf? Did we leave even that a mouth? I don't know, but look, we could this is standing order to Google the dad from Alf. And then we did go on an extended run about the reporter and what the reporter did to get the pictures. The photographer. Yeah. Deep dive, deep dive. And how he was like for a reporter like that, it was a pretty big it was a pretty big scoop, I guess you'd say. And we sort of maybe reimagined what that convo was like when that reporter brought in the picks and was like, guess what I got. Yeah, go ahead, do it. There's a lot of him bursting into the the newsroom saying, I had to, Gary. And we again we can bleep, but he can be like, so to get these pictures, I lotter smoke a lot of why are we recounting the thing we all gotta key, we can put it in now because everybody knows we cut it. So it's fine. Yes, so we were we were cool. So now yes, they know we've made the sacrifice, Keith. Okay, great. That's what it takes. So now it's fine. Because we're not saying it now. Right now we're talking about something that was not said. So it's fine because we're not talking about now. We're talking about something other people said earlier. Exactly. That wasn't us. That was that was us in the past. Right. You get it. Wait, Andy go, what were you about to say? Just that the the photographer, the photojournalist was probably like if you know in order for me to gain everyone's trust, I had to do it all. So like these photos you're looking at, you don't even under you don't even want to know what I was doing while I took the the rest of you are almost not reporters compared to what I But I'll give you a hint. It was smoking while fing and being c we gotta bleep all that. We gotta bleep all of that. 'Cause I don't want that out there. I had to, Gary. Gary. You can just not say it. It's fine. It's just not sweet. You want the scoop or not, Gary. Do you want the best story that's ever been in a newspaper or don't you? Wait, this is a a story that I'm just gonna read and we can decide what we think. Okay. This is from uh Quaid. Alf was a notoriously unhappy, unfun set. The actors were actually relieved when the show was cancelled. To make twenty minutes of Alf took like twenty hours, namely due to the complications of working with a puppet. Right. Uh the actors, especially Max Wright, as the dad, were visibly not amused by the improv improvisation and tasteless jokes of Paul Alf Fusco. Supposedly on the last day of filming, Max Wright left the studio after rapping his last scene without even saying goodbye to his co-w Andrea Elson, who played the daughter, vowed never to act again after working on the show. Each scene required take act after take, which led to some truly bizarre line reads by Max Wright. Notice that when MBC did the Project Alf TV movie, uh only ALF uh was the only returnee. So what you're saying is the show is what led to the behavior. Yeah, I I think drove him into the arms of the you know I'll do you one more. Uh excellent movie based on uh his own autobiography. Uh Permanent Midnight. Do you remember the movie Permanent Midnight with Ben Stiller? Where he plays a T V writer? Yeah, I never saw it but I I remember it existing. Yes. Uh it's about a television writer and his addiction and recovery. That writer in real life wrote on Alf. Yeah. True story. There's like nods to an alf like show in the movie, correct? Or am I misremembered? I believe there is, yeah. It was kind of the original adaptation, if you will. Yeah. Oh my god. There you go. It had to be so awful to work on to bring everybody to that. This is at like when there were still four channels and this was a prime time show that was a massive, not just a massive hit, but it was like changing the culture and like was on the cover of like Time magazine and stuff. Alf is still something we talk about. Yeah. That's how toxic and poisonous this workplace was. Well, here's the thing, like Andy, because I want to see you act again, I now I don't know if you should do this show. You know what I mean? Oh, because you don't want it to send me into a spiral. Yeah. I mean half and or an alf is Imagine being the only human surrounded by elfs. That's crazy. Yeah. Well we our big takeaway, Andy, is that we produce it, you star in it, and you're even angrier than getting talked into this podcast because you're working with like seven puppets a day. And we're all just like, hey, we're heading out. And you're like, oh my what? I gotta do the omelet scene again. Yeah. There might be a good movie to be made for reels that's shot a little bit doc style, like um, the wrestler, but it's about Andy as an actor getting cast in an all alf sitcom. Right. Yeah. And so it's just like showing the behind the scenes of this happening. Yeah. Yeah. That sounds fun to watch and not to make. I think a lot of things about this are good. Mm-hmm. Any other uh cool slang words that have Yeah, what do you call there's obviously the uh the alpha off between um ham and sandburg. Uh what do you call a feud between a ham and uh sandburg? Uh obviously it's a hamburger. Right.. Ye Yeahah. That's that's correct. Although somebody else said you can't have beef with John Ham, uh you have pork. Too Shay. Yeah. I would love to shame that person, but I've we've established I've gone pretty deep on the ham buns . Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh wow you've dipped a toe. Um here's just a few more. I want my ringtone to be a Kiva sad I guess so when Seth says should we do push-ups? It was sad. Oh, was that really depressing when you said it? It's it's how I felt. So I'm glad my Wait, did you guys do more push-ups? I just did push-ups before we got on this. I did 50 push- ups. So I'm raring a go. Oh boy. They both did push-ups at the end of the last episode, and I was like, do it again. Now this is bad radio. Do you remember the Balen brothers, Andy? I sent a bottle of sparkling app le juice juice. Okay, so somebody else uh did you get it? We watched Dress and Air last week. Oh, I might have to listen to that app. It gets pretty thin. It gets pretty thin when you're not here in Bottom of the barrel. Let's hear it from dress . All right. This is great. As a non native speaker, it took until the tenth repetition for me to understand that did you get it was literally asking if the apple juice arrived at their house. I kept thinking the joke was that there was some silly double entendre , and I sent a bottle of sparkling apple juice to your house, which the band thought was super clever and they just wanted you the listener to get it. Oh they get the joke. But it's actually just did you receive it, of course. Yeah. Um the Alf show should be called three Alphans. That was suggested. Oh, like Alphans in the chipmarks. Uh whoever wins the Alpha off is the Alpha male . Yeah too. Uh keep said I was leading with my forehead in uh my push ups and somebody uh very hurtfully said hard for Seth not to lead with his forehead. There's so much of it. Exclamation point. Oh are you thought of as a large foreheaded person? I am. We're all going that direction. Come on. Yeah, I mean nobody's nobody's all of a sudden getting less forehead. Here's what I'll say. If you have a face, there's one feature for everyone. That's the biggest one. You know what I mean? Yeah. Oh, it's like the first time you get like a caricature done, you're like, Oh that's why I don't want to do that Simon Rich Broadway show. No No no I love imagining you texting Simon that. Oh I can't. I can't. I really can't. Oh I can't do it, buddy. Well I mean I'll do it. Do I have final do I have uh final cut on my caricature? Do I have approval on my caricature. My Coney Island caricature. Anyway, Yorms would be his left eye. Alright, let's move on. Oh fuck you man. Um now you're gonna think about it though. Was I being serious or was it a bit? I just gonna fucking haunt you till your deathbed baby. Wait, you guys, you guys, I did a Reddit AMA and it was really fun and we should do one at some point with all the extra time we have. Oh I'd love to do a Reddit AMA. Maybe we could just do a Reddit AMA while we're podcasting. That would be a better use of time for sure. Yeah. We did one back in the day, the three of us, Yorm. I was gonna say, Yorm, you know we've done one as a limited. I know. It was really fun when we did it. I've done a red they're delightful. Support comes from AG1. Spring means more movement, trips, eating out, going on spring break, where you don't have your regular mic, so the audio's a little janky. Stay consistent with your health. Wherever the season takes you, AG1 travel packs, make it easy to keep your routine. I'm on vacation right now. 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For a limited time, Home Chef is offering my listeners 50% off and free shipping to your first box plus free dessert for life. Go to Home Chef.com slash island. That's Home Chef.com slash island for fifty percent off your first box and free dessert for life homeschef.com slash island must be an active subscriber to receive free dessert you know we on a recent episode maybe even this one that you're listening to, we talked about the Lonely Island hasn't been together since uh 2019. And uh in 2019, I was in Minneapolis and I was uh taping my first Netflix special, and the fellows were out there doing their tour, and I was traveling uh with my opener Brooks Whelan and we booked ourselves a little house on Airbnb. It's a great platform to find uh incredible places to stay. And for us it was great because we knew we were gonna be in uh Minneapolis for a couple of days, and we thought, why not be somewhere we could be comfortable, keep our own hours, you know, uh not worry about uh if we were gonna sleep in and miss breakfast, make our own breakfast. We wanted to book a house that was close to Lake Minatonka. We don't want to be in downtown Minneapolis, we want to be somewhere The day after I taped my special and the afternoon uh that we were gonna go see the Lonely Island. And uh man, the options are available to us on Airbnb. It was very fun to choose. We made great a selection and we had a great time. I'll tell you that much. I can't recommend it enough. Booking a trip on Airbnb makes for a better trip. This is very exciting. Okay. Um she becomes uh a a lynch bin host uh for I guess at this point coming up on like it was crazy to think, but like fifteen years, right? What year is this episode? Two thousand eleven. Um she's fantastic and we're well past the birth of Indy Slea's I'm sorry? What is that reference? That's what all the music we liked around this time is called now. Oh, is it really? Indie Slea? Really? Yeah, did you? Oh fuck. Give us some Indie Slea's bands. Like Phoenix? Block party? No, like the strokes and yeah, yeah, yeah. That seems like a full that's a full decade before this. Oh, you did say we're well past. I said well past. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I fucked up, man. I fucked up. This is October twenty ten. Well, I don't agree with that. To me, it was just music. L C D. Like basically all the bands in the Meet Me in the Bathroom book. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Very cool. Um Alright, guys. You do uh I broke my arm. Memories of it? Anybody? Um I remember uh Will Gluck, director of Easy A, who I knew a little bit, hitting me up and being like, hey, Emma's coming on, do a great video for her, will ya? And we were like, yeah, of course. Um this happened. Don't worry, pal. We're gonna make the biggest one we've ever made. This one's gonna be a splash . But just being like, oh, we knew coming in that either she or Will Gluck wanted us to do a song or something big and fun and showcase her, which we had already wanted to and were excited to do. Um, I don't remember how the idea came about though. So just checking, you guys made an album and you're still uh not doing one of your album songs. You're still playing it close to the best. Yeah. Coming up with new stuff. I think maybe 'cause we were like wanting to be strategic about it and and do like one of the ones we thought was gonna be more big. Yeah. Cause had we put out we're back, we had, right, to announce it. I don't think we had yet. You don't think we had, Keith? I'll I'll look it up. Uh so Easy A, just to tell you, came out in September of 2010 and then this episode's October. So I think this is a victory lap a month later of like, ooh, that movie came out great. Let's have firms. Okay, good. So yeah, you were in a you're in a kind of a surprise hit. And I do believe that's why we'll text the name. Um but we were already fans of Emma's and we were excited. I mean, as soon as we had seen Super Bad, we were like, whoa, who's that? She's super funny and great. Uh we didn't put out we're back till April Fool's Day of 2011. So four months after this. Or five gotcha gotcha. good memory So maybe we were strategizing. I think we just hadn't even started on album stuff yet. We just had the demos and we just weren't touching them yet. We were still probably like mixing and figuring out what it was gonna be. Yeah. Um, but anyway, we just did it the way we always do it where we locked the door and tried to figure out an idea. But I have a feeling I broke my arm wasn't a kiva. That just strikes me as Yeah. I don't have any real memory. Honestly, the only real memories I have were that we started writing it, we were enjoying it, and then we were like, we need an escalation here. And Bill was in our office, and he's the one who pitched the um the wheelchair beat. And we all started laughing. And we're like, and I remember it even being a discussion of like, can we do that? Is that too fucked up? And then it was making us giggle enough that we were like, I think it's above board, and did it. Um, and then uh as you'll see at the end, we just completely shoehorn me into it. So that I had something in the show. And we roped we roped Chrysal into the VFX to make that happen. Yes. Um shall we watch it? Should we do an old school rewatch, Kiev? Yeah. Did you guys watch it already? Or this is gonna be fresh. I haven't yet. I have not yet either. I didn't. I will say I remember uh enjoying it. It's fun. Yorm, were you there? Because you weren't there for the last one and I don't remember if you were there for the I feel like I was there for some of the recording but not all I wonder what were you up to what were you doing at this time? And there's no McGruber this week, right? No, but you you also weren't there for the rescue dogs. No, no, no. Yeah. So where were we? No, no, being lazy? I don't think so. I don't I don't think you're allowed to be lazy. No, there ought to be a reason you weren't there. Well they gotta look at the rundown. I think this one's gonna maybe this is my prediction, and then we'll see what happens.. Ooh No disrespect to anyone involved. I think this might be an inverted Akiva where we think it's pretty good and then we watch it and we're like, it's a little well I'm just biting my tongue to not be a cliche . Oh yeah, that's fine. But do you remember not thinking it was great? You already did kind of say Yeah, I remember because again, the ones that feel worse, a la Boogerman, how I thought I felt about it, is the ones that I feel like are swinging for the fences and then getting, let's say it's a single, but we're swinging so hard. We like are pointing out at the at the bleachers like we're gonna hit a home run and then we're getting a single. And a single is very respectable if if that's what you're going for, but when you point it at the bleachers and then Oh wait, sorry. I know we want to jump into this. Did we get a nice quump on Boogerman? How'd it go? Oh, we haven't looked at the quump. What were we looking to get to? I think we needed 7,000 more to get over something, right? Wasn't that it? Oh yeah, to get over 200,000. Hold on, let me ch I'll do I'll do that. Has any baseball player ever pointed to first base? Because that's a fucking pretty That'd be nice. Be like, that's the base I'm gonna go to first. I'm gonna get to first. Oh my gosh. Booker Man's at two hundred and twenty thousand. Whoa, that's right. So that's like a twenty-seven thousand quump, right? Yeah. That's a big quump. By the way, somebody also wrote eight days ago, like if you're here for the quump and it has two hundred and th umbs up. Man, y'all the best. Give me a break. Give me one whole break. That's a big quump for old Booger Man. Yeah, that's hit me one whole break. Appreciate all that. Appreciate the quump, Cueto . Hey, lay off Keve's wife, brother. That's our friend. It's weird. They're both our friends. We need them for the long haul. It's just weird they're hanging out. I don't know. I don't know. Maybe they're just like it could just be emotional. Every time I bring it up she just tells me that I sound stupid. She's like this sounds stupid right now. Okay. And then she goes, not that that's anything new and then closes the door. Yeah. Just full gaslight. Somebody wrote uh, by the way, there was 10 months was the last uh comment for Boogerman, and then there's like 30 since then. And somebody wrote, watching this with Digman in the background while quibbling, while quibbying and googling stronts. That's cablimal. Hidden it from all angles. Rolled off the tongue. Oh, we were that. Uh I had something I was gonna promote in that same quump way, but I think it's already sold out, which is the pop star screening. Yeah. That I texted. I had texted that so that we could promote that there's going to be a ten year anniversary screening at The Egyptian in LA. But I think it's already. I know. I it was going to be me and Yorn, but I guess I'm going alone. I'm going to go to Kevin Smith's theater. That's the reason why I can't go. Hey w you know what's cool? Talk about clerks and and dog s. I will. I will. Ten years later. Or whatever. Um you know what could also be good was if you pointed to the ground because you're gonna bunt. I was just thinking about that. Yeah, you don't really want to tip 'em off on that one. Yeah, element of surprise kind of key on a bunt. Yeah. I feel like everybody, every batter could point to first base. Just ask Tom Berenger's character in major league . Major league may say does he bunt a lot? I don't remember. Oh yeah. He's a big bunter. Yeah. Spoiler. Does he point to the bleachers and then bunt? Yeah. It would have been so much better if he'd pointed to the ground and then hit a home run though. Um, all right, let's watch it. And by the way, I hope we have some time because there are a couple sketches I'm gonna talk about. It's not a Seth's corner, but there's a real Keenan this is a real Keenan's corner episode. Well we have not had a Seth's corner in many movies. I I know. Maybe I'm just maybe the pump's gone dry a little. I'm trying to find something I want to talk about. Disagree strong with the phone there's an Andy's corner from dress as well. Oh yeah. We got a lot. We got a lot of good stuff to talk about. All right, let's blaze through this. All right, I'm hitting play. Here we are, guys. I think this short's gonna rock . I'm unpredictable. I love it . Hey everybody, did you hear the news ? I broke my arm. She broke her arm. If you really wanna know how I broke my arm, I slipped and fell in some sticky grape jelly. Every single year there's a girl who breaks her arm And this year I'm that girl Now sign a cast Sign a cast Sign a cast Now sign a cast Now sign a cast Sign a cast! Sign a cast! Now sign ! What who made this beat? I assume you. I don't think so. It's fun. It's a fun beat. So far my favorite part is the line, every year there's a girl who breaks her arm. Right. There's a premise happening here that like you know when you're in high school there's like always some girl and she's got a broken arm at some point. You're like, I guess that's not really a solid observation to start like a standard. Keyve. You know all the John Hughes movies, there's always the girl who broke her arm. That's in there. One of my daughters broke her wrist once and had a full cast like that, just like Emma's, and she definitely was into it and was psyched. Yeah, it's cool. Yeah. My early report is I like this premise and I find her incredibly winning. Well, yeah. She's really selling shit out of it. She's one of the all-time greats. She's one of the all-time greats. Great to see the old cafeteria. The thing about Emily is, you know, she she can do it. Pretty sure it's Emma. Now we're just starting to get that Greg's take. It actually is Emily. Hey, the uh I was being insider. Question, what is this light wall behind it? Is it just white that we pointed lights at? I think that's what it is. Because we're in the cafeteria that's no longer there. The old NBC commissary. Which we shot a lot of stuff. Yes. Laser cats actually. Laser cats, foo fighters getting punched. The audience now is familiar with this space. But we've made it into a high school 'cause look at we have a homecoming banner. We have Go Team. We've got a bunch of you know like sports stuff hung up. It's fall, I guess, because there's a leaves. Kids have bags. You know, like look at this extra with this c normal school bag you might have. If you really wanna know how I broke my arm, I slipped and fell in some sticky grape jelly. Ew every single year there's a girl who breaks her arm And this year I'm that girl Now sign a cast Sign my cast Sign a cast Now sign my cast Now sign a cast Sign a cast Sign a cast Now sign a cast She's selling it. There's Abby and Paul. We did do a precursor shot of the foot by the jelly before the slip. Yeah, to show how close it was getting. Yeah. And the jelly was still there. Kind of building tension. Do we think that's because we figured they'd be ahead of us. Yeah, foreshadowing. Yeah. We got Jay and Paul Britton here. We're deep into our run. Yeah. We're deep into our. We got uh Abby Elliott was in the other shot. Mm-hmm . Hey everybody, did you hear the news? I broke both arms. She broke both arms. I slipped again in that pes ky grape jelly cool guys think I'm super sexy. So sign a cast, so I'm a cast, so I'm a cow I did it again Hey everybody, I broke my leg and both my arms broke I broke my other leg wait, I think I can get up. I got The less I look super sexy Sign my keyboard. Sign my keyboard. Sign my keyboard. It is dark. Sign my keyboard. Sign my keyboard. Sign my keyboard. Tell him Ray Jelly. Well, I'm the grape jelly and it's plain to see. Man, she slipped in me. So don't try to it's all baloney. Ex-wife asking for the alim ony. It ain't mine, I was wearing a chip hat like a bitch So why so so his rap is just starts with a sentence about the premise and then just goes into a bit of his personal life. That has so many like just lonely island ismsms on every level. Yeah. Going faster and faster. Steve, I feel like this is a classic Keeve. That's better than you remembered. I'd say it was right around where I remembered. I remember Brian Tucker liking the grape jelly wrap. I'll say that. Yeah. Great. Because the ex-wife asking for the alimony, the kid ain't mine. Lion bitch trying to get me from my scratches. Yeah. Yeah. We learn a lot about Yeah, he's and and he's maybe not the hero of his own story. He might be the villain. We don't I'm immediately s I'm siding with the wife immediately. I like somebody reached out to Grave Jelly and they like explained what the song was and they're like, We'd love you to do a guest verse and then he like sent that and they're like, I don't think he listened to the song. That's that is exactly I think this is a old verse. He had a old verse that he just tried to pawn off on us. Grape jelly face tough to look at. The color of the makeup really doesn't match the jelly in a way that's upsetting. Yeah. Takes it takes even a second to know it's you. Yeah. I like his Mickey Mouse limbs. I might have plausible deniability on this one. Robot Mickey Mouse arms and legs. Yeah, he does have he does have Mickey Mouse limbs. I also like that uh Chrysler uh put uh the the reflection into the table too. Like that's that's a pretty good job. Oh yeah. I like that you guys knew it was too sad to keep going and so you had to like have a create and it was too soon to end it. And so you uh you rocked out grape jelly. Also, she on her keyboard types in bitches ain't shit, but o's and tricks. She needs to get in. She's still in the song. Yeah. Well, she's in his song now. That wasn't part of her. Obviously at this point. No surprise to the world at large now that that Emily Stone has a pretty dark sense of humor. True indeed. This was not a tough sell. No, no, no. I would say maybe the th the detail that I take away liking the most is all of the other quote unquote kids very reluctantly doing the call in response on nevertheless, she's still super sexy. Yeah. Are you saying that because every single one of them looks like a teacher when you say quote unquote? Uh yeah, I would say so. A lot of the cast that's in this though, they could be playing high school like in a nineties show. Yeah. Yeah. They're nine oh two and oh ages. But I I think you were saying something genuinely nice, Andy, and I as the negative one will agree that that the call and response but then they're doing it where they're they all have this look of in their eye of like we shouldn't still be doing this. Yeah like like this is cross the line but we're gonna support her, but we I don't know. That is a good move. Not a digital short, but of course uh she went on to do Wells for Boys. The actress, I believe is the name of the one where she was the non-sex performing cast member in a pornogra phy film. Which is really funny. And then she married Dave McCarey, who directed those. So But don't forget her most important piece of work ever, written by Mike O'Brien, Making Technology Hump. Yeah. Which is that this episode or next time? I think next time. I look forward to watching that. We'll get there. We'll get there. Uh I will say I enjoyed that a great deal. I think it'll be a nice quamp bump. A nice quump. What number? Wait, hold on. I'll get it. Let's let's over under the quump So it's at 6.6 mil. If it gets a bad quamp, could we call it a crumb bum quamp quamp bump ? Yes . Okay. Sometimes we might want to aim for a crumb bum quump bump . Well when you said it was thirty comments, I'm like, well that's not that good of a quump. Boogerman got a legit quump, but also the numbers feel pretty massive because it was so low to start with. I mean there's people on their comment ing from yesterday, day before, like early quump gang. Yeah . You know. It's a good t-shirt, early quump gang. Quump gang It would be nice if we had badges. If there was a way for us to give like online badges for Quump Gang, that would be a nice thing to be able to do. Um Keith, can you open up the thet for the You forgot one thing, Seth? You forgot one thing, Seth. We don't need those thinking badges. Oh that,'s good. Now here's my question to you, Andy. Very good. No, but they do though, Andy. Yeah, no, but they do for real. They do for real. I have a hardcore answer to this, a true answer. How did you first know the line? We don't need no stinking badges. Did you actually see the source? Oh, you know it's UHF. UHF. UHF. It is UHF for me as UHF all. And then it was years later that I saw the treasure of Sierra Madre, and I'm like, oh it was a badgers. I knew what it was from from my dad explaining it though. But I had not seen it. But him going, Oh that's a good one. Did you drag your dad to UHF though? Or was it in like the trailer? I'm sure. I don't think I got to see UHF in the theater. I think that was a VHS. It's so funny now being a dad and doing that same thing. I'm being like, oh, well, this is a reference to this. Like in trolls. These songs are old songs. Yeah. I do remember making my kids listen to Time After Time because it's in trolls, but the real one. And Cindy Lauper, of course, legend the best. But her version is much less pop sounding 'cause her voice is like a little like Yeah and Cindy Lauper. Uh it's Cindy Loppery, so it's scratchier, I guess is what I'd say. Compared to Justin Timberlake. And An Anna Kendrick and Justin Timberlake is a lot more kid friendly versions sounding of it. Yeah. Oh no, true colors. It's not time after time. Don't want to get the jackals after me, Seth. Oh I said uh wait wait like I assume for all of us, Cindy Lauper over Madonna when we were kids. Like to me I was like uh totally in love with I mean not to overstate it, but for me over everything. City Lapper over everything. Yeah. But my kids link the true colors from the troll soundtrack more. So wait, we you we got um wait, Seth, we got in trouble because um you said you were watching Liar Liar, but then it had Evan Almighty and that's of that's from Bruce Almighty. Yep, I fucked up. We were watching Bruce Almighty. Fucked up. I know that. Fucked up. Oh shit. And I'm so fucking sorry. I shouldn't even host a podcast. I'm so fucking sorry. I'm having intrusive thoughts. Jorn, will you will you open the episode? Sorry, Keyve, will you open the episode and and screen share it? Yeah, I was gonna say, like I don't do that. No problemo. Just no problemo . Just play your demo. Go to like forty seven ten. All right, uh Jimmy McMillan, local New York politician, started the Ramp is too damn high party. All right. So this is a real guy who is ahead of his time. Obviously the current mayor of New York, uh Zora Mamdanny basically won uh ran away with the race because he made the point that real estate rent is too damn high in New York. Jimmy was ahead of his time. Keenan is Jimmy McMillan, written by Colin Joseph, one of my favorite things in the history of the show. And uh let's just listen to it through because it's really some pretty incredible. Do you want to describe what we're looking at first? So we're on weekend updates. We're on weekend update. This is uh a very good. I mean, again, hair makeup wardrobe, of course, crushing the actual look. He always wore black gloves, uh, bald head, long white hair. Uh what would you call that mustache? It's like I feel like that's a famous name of a mustache. Like basically the mutton. Yeah, the mutton chops go across into a mustache and then also a big bushy goatee. It's a fantastic look. Look it up. Um but let's just give it a listen Allow me to introduce myself. I represent the rent is too damn high party . You know why? Because the rent is too damn high . People got seven jobs, they're working 36 hours a day, 12 days a week, and they can't afford a roof. I will make sure that you have a roof over your head, money in your pocket, and breakfast, lunch, and dinner . You hear that? Somebody's stomach just ground . That was a children's stomach just grab because the rent is too damn high. You know how much a one bedroom apartment costs in Manhattan? $7,000 to7 $,000 a month . You know what a roof costs? You can't afford it. You know what breakfast, lunch, and dinner costs. Put it this way: it'd be cheaper to eat a roof . And you probably look at me and you're thinking to yourself what is he just another Washington insider shaking his head very gently what is he part of the establishment well believe it or not I have never been a governor anywhere. People ask, if elected, how would you lower our rent? Simple. The rent is too damn high . A house in Queens costs 17 million dollars. Part three. What ? If elected president, I will make sure every single American eats breakfast, lunch, and dinner . You on a diet? Too bad. Breakfast, lunch, You in a car driving around all day? Pull over. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. You already ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner? I don't care. You're gonna eat breakfast, lunch and dinner again. Cause why? Cause the rent is too damn high . Now Mr. McMillan, what about these reports that you yourself haven't paid rent since the 80s? You know why I don't pay my rent, Seth? Well if I had to guess, I would say it's because the rent is The Rent is too damn high. So it is Halloween. Go for Jimmy McMillan. Halloween. With your help. I hope to become the first black governor ever elected from the rent. It's too damn high potted. Come aboard the Jimmy McMillan Express. You can grab on here or here . Because it's gonna be a wild ride. A very short, very wild ride. Jimmy McMillan , everybody. Grabbing that his own handlebar mustache. God Keenan is so good. Fucking he's amazing. The way he pronounces the word McMillan is possibly the best part, and that's saying a lot. Dimamelin. It's just all one. Yeah. And then let's go straight 12617 uh Keith. Can I say one thing before we go to that Seth? Yeah. I want to talk about, and I'm guilty of this more than maybe anyone, and I used to try for it every time. Update features trying to add one last joke after the clapping starts. Yeah. Yeah. And it it never lands, but it's always in. And I would always try to do it myself. Yep. And then you always watch it and you're like, it just gets lost. Why does everyone do it? I I still do it. I did it. So why did we do it? It's like part of the energy though. I will sometimes, Andy, on my show today, be like, hey, you know, like give it up for Anna Kendrick, everybody do the best. And then I'll try to like call back something she said. Yes. And I'm like, it's why? They're all clapping. Because it feels more human. It feels more natur al as a human being to keep going, to not just be like, and now I'm shut down, I'm a robot. Right. But it it always is kind of just soupy. Yeah. Anyway, hit us in the titus. Should people stop? No. There's nothing wrong with it though, right? There's nothing wrong with it. Do people like it just energetically? Hit us in the titus? Yeah. Would you rather they try to get in one last joke or just lean their head back uh Quado style where they have gone genocide for the part? Quaddo with a T. Just be like Just shutting shutting down would be pretty funny too. That'd be very funny. At the end of update if they're like Jimmy McMillan, everyone Everybody like Colin and Chate too are like I'm inve been Colin college Jones, I at' Michael J. Just immediately taking off his beard and kind of muttering to himself. Also when he said grab on here and grab on here, he was gesturing to the two different sides of his handlebar mustache. Oh defo. Just for anybody not watching . Support comes from Bombas. The springtime thaw is finally here. Flowers are blooming. Days are longer. We're saying yes to more plans. Finally getting outside running, walking, moving again. Perfect time to upgrade your everyday go-tos with bombas for me. Tennis. My wife and I, we play tennis now. We're that couple. We love it. We love each other. 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Where are the other three hosts of this podcast right now? They're not on the ad read because they're looking, observing, relishing in their new article furniture. Right now Yorim is thinking, what a thoughtful design that makes it incredibly easy to mix and match. And Keep is thinking, this is really helping me create a space that feels cohesive and stylish. And Andy's thinking, I wonder if I'm gonna quibby today. Article takes great care in curating its collection, focusing solely on high-quality, meaningful pieces that will stand the test of time. There's no filler. Every item is chosen for its craftsmanship design and lasting value. You can immediately tell the difference in quality when you receive an article piece, the meticulous packaging, the weight, the feel of the product, and the fact that it comes mostly assembled. I think mostly means, well I can confirm it means can Yorm put it together? Yes. 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This episode is brought to you by Indeed. Stop waiting around for the perfect candidate. Instead, use Indeed sponsored jobs to find the right people with the right skills fast. It's a simple way to make sure your listing is the first candidate C. According to Indeed Data, sponsored jobs have four times more applicants than non-sponsored jobs. So go build your dream team today with Indeed. Get a $75 sponsored job credit at Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and Conditions app ly. What is this one? This is uh Googie Renee. I feel like this second or third Googie Renee. A Googie Renee was like just discount clothing, uh written by the great James Anderson. So just visually without even him play , he's in a red members only jacket. He's got kind of a gray shirt. Yeah. A graying short afro. He's got a uh salt and pepper mustache, yeah. Some kind of chain. He has an afro with one you can tell he's one white spot on his uh gray afro. And then he's got in the background you can see like various superhero and like princess costumes. It's a discount Halloween warehouse. Well we're in a Halloween episode, I guess. Yeah. It's October. Before you start, it says, is Googie Renee, hey how you doing? Is that the first line? I think so. Go back and we miss it. Okay, hold on, I'll go back. Quiet, quiet, quiet. It's gonna start soon. Let those laughs go. This is an iconic Mary Ellen Matthews bumper photo. Oh, Emily looks so nice there, doesn't she? Emily does look stunning. Do you have an impression of Alf's dad? Yeah, he did it. Alf don't need the cat. You you're telling me you don't want to do that over and over again? Do him on his it's his last day, he's just finished his last shot. Do him leaving without saying goodbye there . Okay, but you have to yell cut. And cut. Fuck you guys, I'm gonna go smoke. Jesus Christ. You gotta bleep all that. Fine , fire off. Seth just fell backwards into a birthing pose. Nobody come with me except for you. Larry, Larry the cameraman. We're seeing the tops of his bare knees like he's about to deliver a child. Do you think he invited Larry the cameraman? Come with me, you can make a fortune. Hey, how you doing? There we go. It's me, Googie Renee. Halloween is coming real quick. What you gonna be? A Navi Dabet from the Avatars? Shia. Shia. You want a great Halloween costume, but you don't want to pay supermarket prices, then you need to get to Googie Renee's partially damaged Halloween costume discount bond. Here's my seasonal. What do you have in your hands? I think it's a ghost costume, but the whole back's ripped out. So? Ghosts don't turn around. They just approach. She out . But what about when it's time to leave the party, Googie? I don't know. I cannot plan your life. Maybe get naked underneath and tell people it's a hospital gown. She are hello. I'm interested in this Dracula Cape. Well you should be it's interesting. But it kind of has a weird odor. What is it? I don't know. Let me smell it. I know what it is. Oh, shh oh. That smells like shia . Is there anything you can do about it? No, I'm not touching it anymore. Two dollars. Smelled it twice. Googie Renee's nothing is more than two dollars in a stank basket . Sweet . Googie, something smells over here. It's the stank basket, Linda. Get it out of here . Googie, I love this Greek goddess outfit, but it has tire tracks all over it . That's because the last owner got run over by a smart car . A what? A smart car . Well if it's so smart, why did it hit a person? She uh how do I get this tire track out? Fool around with some bleach. I don't know. Soak it in kaboom. Thanks. I'll take it. The weirdest reason. I'll take it. She could not lose this I love this Marilyn Monroe dress, but I'm concerned about the mustard stain. Well, that's not a mustard stain. That's a baby both . He's not a baby. He's five. Well, he acts like a baby. You need to stop bringing him to work. Does this look like a place for a tad So uh so what do I do about the stain? I don't know. Maybe just hold this gladiator shield in front of it. Marilyn Monroe didn't have a shield. Well, if she had one, maybe she wouldn't have gotten shot. She out Googie Renee's, if we can't figure out how to get rid of the stain on your costume, we will give you things to put in front of it. Like this wolf man wouldn't us weekly . Or Yoda with a pot of chili Or Queen Elizabeth with a baby pool. Now that costume had an enormous thing. Thanks, Googie. I feel special. We all do. Son of our beer. This is about savings . Lot of quotables in that. Lot of quotables. That was the last one of the night. Hey, how you doing? Shia, son of a bea. Fu . That smells like Shia. Also waving the camera in to zoom in onto his face and then having crossed eyes is pretty spectacul ar. Um that was uh there were the SNL T shirts. We've talked about the SNL T shirts. There was an SNL T shirt year where it was just a cartoon of Googie Renee's face and the famous line, it's not rocket problems. It's not rocket problems. Oh yes. I I do remember that shirt now. Rocket problems. This is about savings. This is about savings. That's quite a few. Um do we want to talk about Griff Banks. Well, Griff Banks we have talked about before, correct? And then we know that the story ends with Second Chance Theater. Second chance theater on your but was this the first time? Or you had you tried it before, and this is the second time you tried it. This is post-Gabaret Sidobay, correct? Because I think that was the first time we tried it. But it by the way, this is the second time we tried and it got to dress again and did not air again. So do we want to look at it and to see if it should have aired? Yeah. Well the question is is it different? Uh a la Mondo Butts, right? Like was was it adjusted? There was no pre watch to determine that. No. We don't know. But let's just give it a little look see, shall we? Okay. All these photos seem like winners to me. Wait, is that the high school Yorm that we always high school is in West LA? Yorm's been an extra on some T V show at this he was like nineteen or twenty. Yeah. And I shot rescue rangers here. This is the high school in the beginning of Rescue Rangers when the Chip and Dale are little and my kids are sitting on the lawn right here. In Lee High School. It kind of looks like the Billy Madison high school too, but I bet that's not. It could be if the they should I don't feel like they shot Billy Madison in LA. Look it up. Hit us in the tennis. It's been in tons of stuff. Including use the stock footage before this famous cut sketch. Hit us in Keeve's tittis on that one. I don't want to be bothered with it. I'd like to have my tittis free of it. It's a perfect looking high school for shooting. Yeah. It's a dress sketch, so I don't think we can show it. So never mind. Hey, check out Chippadale Rusk Rangers now on Disney Plus if you want to see this high school. And this guy's going for that body. Also this guy's quomping. Quomp. April 17th at the Egyptian Theater. Pop Star. It's sold out already. What are you doing? It's got 500 seats. That's a lot of butts already decided to come see it. That's mod. While you're at it, check out the godfather too. Michael Colleone's back. But now he's the boss. It's the best godfather. He's back and maybe even more violent. The boy needs a quump. Alright, shall we ? Ooh, wait, stop. Background actors putting way too much stank on it right out of the gate. I mean this is addressed so that one that note probably would have got through. Well also why like we'd have to check the script, but you probably didn't put ten seconds of dead air right at the top . Hey, can I just say as well, since we you know we got back into the stuff we cut with Alstad, we may also made some cuts in Boogerman. What I should have said is there is a an extra in the beginning standing with Bill. Right. Who I feel as though was under directed by a Kiva. I feel like false eyes. So underdirected is the course correction on how you're describing that. Got it. Sure. Yeah. We don't know and we'll never know what I said no in what we edited. No. But in in looking back I do feel as though and again maybe I'm look am I looking for a secondary quump? Do I want people to go back and give it one more look see? I feel as though she just wasn't quite being told. Yeah, trying to bump the quump. Yeah. And we'll never know if you wanted to say that a second time because it was so cruel or because your audio was so bad. There's no way to suss it. No way. And Yorm, you're saying that if somebody isn't satisfied with the qu initial quump and asks people to go You're trying to bump that quump. Yeah. Seth's trying to bump the quump. Well you especially are gonna want to do that if you get a a crumb bum quump bump. Uh in uh very similar to the issue by the way, obviously I broke my arm, high schoolers. Now we have high schoolers. Uh I would say Fred looks like Gabe Kaplan's dad . And and Bill looks like the uh who's the guy? Uh hold on. Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. Bingo. That's who he looks like. Yeah. He really does. He looks like that. Who he's also played. So Andy, you do you think Booger Man got a crumb bum quump bump? Because I 27 ,000 is pretty good. For Boogerman, that's a stellar quump bump. Right. So you think Seth trying to bump the quump is unnecessary? Oh I mean I think it's already had its due and its day in the sun. Okay. Yeah. Oh wait. So a crumb bum quamp bump is not that it didn't deserve it. It's a just a bad quump. It's bad quump. Yeah, exactly. It's bad quite crumbs. It was crumbs. Quades didn't come through and give it the proper quump it deserved. But Boogerman didn't get that, so then trying to bumpump the qu doesn't feel n uh earned. You need to bump the quump because it wasn't bump quump bump. Right. While you guys were talking about chrome bump quump bumps, it also occurred to me that Bill looks a little bit like Christmas Jim Jordan as well. Who I think later he played. I think later he played, because I think when Lauren was watching this, at this point Lauren already knows he's cutting it because of the ten seconds of dead air and then these two forty five casting for other sketches now? Two forty-five year old high school. We're gonna also see how it plays, but yeah, it was cooked. Early I would say this is an early cooking. You accidentally had the oven turned up to a thousand degrees. I I pulled up the the script from Kevin. It says open on. It says exterior high school from Chippendale Rescue Rangers Day. Then it says 10 seconds dead air while extra clear. Oh wow. So who was on us. And then finally it's like Fred and Bill enter as two high school students looking at their books. So it's got a weird open right off the bat. Yeah. And in parentheses it says old. In retrospect, would have probably omitted some of that. You wanted them to look at old books, but the uh the Donroy King was like, Oh, they're supposed to be old guys. Right, right, right. Yes. This so this sketch did get done at Second Chess Theater. Yeah. Yeah. Is this Wanna Come With though? No. No. No, we've done both at Second Chess Theater. So you've done two in the case. Griff Bank's the sensitive bully, yeah. Got it. Me and Seth are great friends. I was there. I was there for Wanna Come With, but I guess I that's why I I remember it. Well the second chance theater of Griff Banks is about to get a quamp on Were you there, Keith? Was it a sort of who's on first situation where Andy said, I'm going to Seth want to come with and you thought he was inviting you? Yeah. And so I did so I went. Yeah, you you came and Andy was like, What are you doing here? And you were like, you said wanna come home. And he was like, that's the name of the sketch. That's exactly what happened. Exactly. And I was like, what sketch? Except for when Keith showed up, I said, What are you doing here? What are you doing here? This is I by the way, this is an insanely long preamble to talk about a sketch we've already talked about. That is we're about to look at the time it got cut for the second time. Yeah. I'm excited to hear it. All right. Here we go. The limit as X approaches zero is zero. Hey nerds! Give me your lunch money or I'll pound you. We just gave it to you yesterday., Griff Well I want it again, so cough it up! Hey, just leave us alone, Griff. What'd you just say to me? Hey, you're always picking on everyone, but you're not so tough. You're just a a big jerk. No, I'm not Are you crying? No ! Gr ill Fangs is a wheat of bullet ! Grill Fangs, but he's also a bug! I g I feel like we should have watched the first version of this. Did you think it had this? Yes. Uh yes. The same or changed? I don't think this is massively different. I don't say for something that had already gone addressed once before, there's a lot of dead air and like miscues. Well that was written into the sketch. No, you're right. This is not nobody is taking advantage of uh this is our second time through. He says, No, I'm not, and then we wrote parenthetical, we wait seven seconds for them to roll the theme song. It's a lot of weird choices, Andy. Al, letrig'hts go back in. What's up, you queefs? Oh. Hey . Oh, hey, Griff. Did you do my homework like I told you to? Or am I gonna have to pound you? Hey, come on, Griff, take it easy. What'd you just say to me? I didn't do your homework, okay? I'm not scared of you. Griff? My old man's always wailing on me. What? My family's always moving around, so we never made any real friends. Oh boy. Yeah, let's get out of here. Well, screw you guys then. Who needs ya? Hey, hey, Num Nuts, what's the matter with your books? Hey, don't do that again or I'll hit you. What's wrong with you? I wear swim trucks in the showers. What? It hides my diaper! So you got problems, man! I do, I do, man. Thanks for listening, bro. You're my best friend. We're not friends! Oh fine then! Screw you! Who needs ya ? Oh! Come on, Griff, pull it together! You're the king of this school . Hey Griff . I let my dog have sex with me. You gotta I'm a terrible bully. This isn't even a football jacket. It's my little pony . Listen to me. You are a totally decent bully. I am? Yeah. You've got all the classic bully traits. Bad home life, low self-esteem. I hate nerds. Yeah, you hate nerds. See? You're a great bully. Here . Take my lunch money. Okay. But can I say I bullied it off you? Sure. Cool. See you around . Oh, a nerd ? Yeah . Thanks. Great look. Hey Gaylord, go to prom with me! Ew, no. But I'm 37 ! Yeah. Yeah, it it didn't deserve to air. No, it didn't. It didn't . I will say my dad's always wailing on me, I believe, every time you did it at the table with a big old laugh. I think about that line a lot. Yeah. My dad's always wailing on me. I say that a lot to my kids. It chilled the audience. You sound you sounded like um baby Brent from um Cloudy with a chance and meatballs. Oh yeah. Well not everyone has a thousand voices like you, Akiva. Thank you. I was fishing for that. You know, in Chippendale. It is great early on when you don't get a laugh on um my dad's always wailing on me. Which also hearing it now makes perfect sense that doesn't get a laugh. I'm just saying like amongst comedy writers it always would. Yes. And then you know like what's coming is that you let your dog have sex with you . People were not finding that funny. They found it quite sad. The audience reaction was exactly the same as Emma's character's reaction of like, oh yeah. Why would you tell me that? Too much pathos. I played it too real, is probably the issue. That's right. You did play it too real. My performance was too grounded, I think. They were like suddenly this is just happening. It was too well acted . That's where you're coming out. Yeah. Yeah. I chilled them because they were like, is this an Oscar film? How did it do how did it do on your show, Seth? Uh uh well I mean Oh it went great on this show. But again, we've set it up. We're like this ain't shit exact like a show. And then like people delight in like knowing like they they're not like the audience got it wrong. They're always like, Oh my god, this is so funny that they tried to do this. Yeah. Wait, wait, wait. Did did you keep uh my dad's always wailing on me? I assume.. A hundred percent Of course. That's I mean that's like the linchpin of the whole piece. You have to keep the good and the bad. Yeah. So I'm turning on the second chance theater . Hello. And welcome to Second Chance Theater . Where sketches that were once cut from Saturday Night Live are given well a second chance. Tonight, a tale of a young high schooler with two disparate personalities tearing him apart. On the one hand, he's an individual who physically and verbally intimidates those whom he perceives as vulnerable, and on the other, he's a giant puss . We now present the sketch Griff Banks the Sensitive Bully starring Andy Sandberg and featuring the second chance players. Please enjoy. Hey there's the high school but it's a different angle? It's a different shot. So that's weird. But same high school. Hey, what'd you get for number eight? Uh same amount of dead air at the top. So what you were the guest, Andy, on Seth Show? So they weren't surprised that it's gonna be you. No. And had you guys already discussed it? Had he already had you already been on the couch? I think we probably had. But then Mulaney's a surprise here, right? Yeah. Yeah. So now now Mulaney is in Bill's spot. Stacking the deck. We're stacking the deck on second chance theater. And who's this other gentleman, Seth? Is it somebody that works for your show? That's uh Jermaine Alfonso. He's a writer for my show, very funny writer for my show. The lim it as X approaches zero is zero. So so far you did cut the dead air. Interesting choice. Okay. Not a ton of it. Hey nerd s . Oh you've got a beard now because you had a beard in real life. Give me your lunch buddy or I'll pound ya . We just gave it to you yesterday, Griff. Well I want it again so cough it up. Based on your face , you thought we were doing a second chance theater of uh two sides. Teen uh oh was it? I thought you were gonna say teen wolf. Yeah, that's that's what it was. No, but it looks like you're Hugh Jack. Yeah, yeah. Leave us alone, Griff. What' youd just say to me? You're always picking on everyone, but you're not so tough. You're just a you're just a big jerk. No , I'm not. Okay . Are you crying? No Grim We did not reshoot, obviously. Grim thanks, buddy's also a first grab . I mean I think we're I think we're good, right? Yeah, we got it. Well let's see who played Emma Stone's part. Amber Ruffin plays Emmett. And Keenan came. Keenan came, man. Keenan came to reprise the same role. Yeah. Can we go to my dog? I let my dog have sex with me and see if it got a laugh here though. I will say the pace is much better here. Yeah. Do you think it's that or do you think it's that it's killing? That's a good point. That's a good point. Hey, hi Griff . What's wrong? I'll let my dog have sex with me. what? Why? I wanted to lose my virginity to someone I knew . Griff, you don't have to tell me this. Oh , this isn't even a varsity jacket, it's my little pony I'm not a bully. I'm just a gaping snorf. Oh bewildered Seth. Gaping Snorf. That's a good addition . Why didn't Lorne doing that during the original one? I know. I mean, by the way. Gaping snorf. I think that's another one for the pod. Uh you're also one of the things, I mean it does go to you acted it too well at SML because you are now just playing a big old splashy cartoon character. You're there's a lot more joy in it now because like yeah you aren't wondering how it's going. You know what I mean? Yeah, correct. There's nothing at stake. The win is that it's in second chance theater. Yeah. Yeah. It's wonderful. What a great way to show it where the audience is in it with you. Yeah. Much like on this pod. I wish all my sketches could have been like that. Yeah. Yeah. Just joy. Just enjoy yourself. You didn't have like a gaping snorf. Just tell everyone beforehand it sucks. And then they'd be like, no, it's good. Um well one thing. Sorry, sets. Go ahead. What? So here we go. So I broke my arm, not criterion, not Kim's video, but fine. Yeah. Is that how we feel? Emma's stone fantastic. Yes. To no fault of Emma's. And it was good, in fact. It's just not one of those two things. Yep, yep. Okay. And you were saying before it started you thought if it was just the jelly stain it would be criterion. Oh my god. Can you imagine a full track of the grape jelly? Yeah. Pretty good. Pretty good. Uh tougher to look at . Uh all right. Well this was just a delight. Great to have the quad out together. Yeah. Weird that you're not um asking me how I did on spelling bee. Well I know. I know you know, but the quads don't Jack Black? Spelling D ellinger Yeah, I quibbe clean. You piece of shit. You'll never beat me, dude. Yeah. You'll never beat me. I missed the Lally Gag, which is heartbreaking 'cause that's there a lot. Um also since we mentioned Jack Lexington in uh tonight. Well , you can't promo a show that's gonna happen in a few hours, but Jack Black, Jack White. Yeah. SNL. Very excited. I wonder how it was. I wonder how it was too. You guys already know. My guess is good. Riz Ahmed. Riz Ahmed is already an hour into hosting SNL UK right now. Wow. Yeah. What a life. What a world that there's two happening. Do you think there's a j uh sketch about his Riz? A minimum joke and a mono? Yeah, or like somebody's the Rizzler. Yeah. Well, does the Rizzler, has he crossed over? Do you think the Rizzler has made a footprint? I think we'd take the pond. Across the pond. I think everything's everywhere. Is the Rizzler across the pond? We don't know. Ooh, if we wrote the Rizzler Ahmed, you could write the Rizzler Ahmed right now. And it's like another person that's playing Riz Ahmed, but he's like the one with charisma. And I think with the time difference, if you wrote it right now, you could still get it in. That's what I mean. Big advantage. Because it doesn't it doesn't air here for an ything it's just because it's not then here now. So that's right. That's it. Uh all right, you guys. Well, let's all get back to our hotel mini bars. Um love you all. Okay, again, this is my home, but yeah, it sounds good. Love you. Love you. Love you guys. Later, Arnold. Later, Quaid