Analyzing Reality TV Dynamics and Bullying

Study and play! Come together on a Winds eleven PC. And for a limited time, college students get the best of both worlds. Get the unreal college deal, everything you need to study and play with select Windows eleven PCs. Eligible students get a year of Microsoft three hundred sixty five premium and a year of Xbox GamePass ultimate with a custom color Xbox wireless controller Learn more at windows. com slash student offffer. Law Supplies last ends june thirtieth terms at aka. mS slash collllege PC All right, it's Wednesday, june seventeenth. It is Hump Day and I'm here with Sarah Haines. because it's Haines on Hp Day. Hayaines on Hump Day U Hi, how are you? I'm good. goodood. I'm glad to have you here. It's been a really big week I' exhausted I feel like I've run a American. I too. I was like after yesterday's show, I was like, It's Friday, right? We're done? No it's. just the mid the midwk. But it's hard to imagine a stronger start to the week. So yesterday, we had on Vice President of the United States, JD Vance got a lot of attention, a lot of articles written, a lot of comments on social media. What did you make of what he had to say? So I read the book and he showed up the way I thought he would I mean, I don't know how to answer it any better. He's a good politician. Yes And you came in you know, with an agenda, but ye and prepared and he's he's for anyone who thoughts about him. He's very kind in person. He carries himself a certain way, but respectful All those things. Yeah. I don't know how much I learned in that interview or had even clarification in that interview I kind of think The answers made sense for who he is the explanations didn't live up to what you'd hope for And the thing I wanted to know the most, I didn't really here Yeah. Well, so it's interesting because I saw a lot of People online wondering how we put these segments together and how we decide who asks what and who works on it. And I saw some from people that are not fans of the show saying they're just reading what the producers gave them and yada yada yada But you spent quite a bit of time. and we work very our producer Carly did a fantastic job with this segment with these segments, but you work with producers on what's important to you to talk about really craft your questions with them. And in particular, you had one question that I think was very much from your heart and impactful and and designed by you. Well, I think the background on that is I'm not a political pundent. I don't come from a political world I I'm kind of a little nerdy on what I seek out to read about or care about. So it's not necessarily the best stuff to produce on TV and all the things. I say that because I always ask myself before an interview, if I had one question with this person, what do I wantna know? And you've heard my stories about asking Hillary Clinton things in the commercials For me, JD Vance and a book on faith. The question came to me early about reconciling his participation and the decisions and the things he's complicit in with a Christian faith in general. But the book spoke at length about how deeply faith based he is, but more so how The impact he wants to have on his kids. And I think anyone that's a parent relate to loving your children. And I think that has been a lot of problem that comes home to me in questions. and I just was curious how JD Vance for what he himself has said and done, but even more so as he stands next to President Trump what he's either not spoken up about or said because there's I mean you can't get a more pure human than Jesus Christ and like as someone who really tries to and speak in a way that honors that example As a Christian, as a mother, a daughter, all the things, I just I don't know how he does what he does and writes what he writes. somethingomet's missing. It doesn't tract I understand that. And he didn't I thought your question was very sincere and well thought out and I really thought you spent I thought it was great He didn't really answer it. No Do you think there is an answer A sincere answer for this I mean, I'll be honest, like I I struggle with my kids explaining what's going on. How aware are We don't like screen timee and that includes not just tablets and things it includes TV. We're very We have a lot of oversight and time limits on that stuff. And whereas CNN before we had kids, like we had the TV on at all times just to see headlines. Max is a huge consumer of it. I've always been in it. So I'm always watching and it just kind of played in the background. We stopped doing that when we had young kids because we didn't want the screens on in general I realize they learn a lot at school and young Yeah. because Alex's in fourth grade and ten, and he's been bringing questions home from every time there's been an election to candidates, he'll sometimes ask us things about it it's two fold. I want to help my kids understand, but I also want to remind them that they need to create opinions of their own and that they're going to have to find their own way through things when it comes to people and what they think and politics and voting and all that. It's been trickier becausecause I think more households talk about President Trump than most people because he is admittedly, whether you're a fan or not, an unprecedented example. as a president of the United States both times. So I just think it when when The kids come home, Alec asks the most questions. he's the oldest. I have to find a way because I'm also the one next to him at church on Sunday. and I try to ter and not hide things from A, but he'll ask some really great questions about why people are treated a certain way. And I try to steer it back to how do you think they should be treated? Because it's really hard to explain away much of what we're seeing. We grew up, you and I in a different time when politicians whether our parents agreed with their policies or not, that was a fair conversation. But it wasn't bad examples. It wasn't embarrassing, it wasn't things you had to turn off in front of your kids. It's not something I've talked to my kids about very much. And I think maybe I'm starting to think maybe I've done them an injustice on it because I was naive to how much they know on their own anyway. And and my eleven year old was when she heard we were having the vice President O was asking me detailed questions with I mean, honestly, she had several questions for the vice president that would have been good to use on the show. And I was astounded by it because I had no idea that she had any kind of political awareness or any kind of this or the other thing. I've done it by design, partly because when I come home, I don't want to talk about politics anymore. That's a big part of it. and partly because I do want to put them in a bubble and because I don't want them to grow up with perception of government that is different than the one I grew up with because this is such an outlier right now. everything is. and Maybe I'm wrong, but part of me thinks that maybe at some point, things will go back to normal, whether that's normal Republican, normal Democrat, normal anything. And I feel like there's a generation that's know nothing but this that is going to have a very different feeling for what it means what what it means to to be in the administration than you and I had growing up, whether you know, I don't remember like and part of this is also not just the politicians in DC, although they have all changed. It's the news cycle. We didn't grow up in a twenty four seven cable news cycle or with smartphones in our hand. So the consumption in the volume is also flooding the zone in a very confusing vitriolic way due to algorithms and all the other things I do I do want my kids to understand that You don't have to hate people that disagree with. Well that's a big part of it for me because there's people in my family that feel differently about politics than we do and I don't want my daughters to feel the same way about those members that they did before or friends that we have or anything else. I don't want them to be talking about this. I don't want them to be taught, by the way that it matters what jersey you're wearing unless it's the New York Nicks. Like I don't want to know about it We'll go to the next believe me. That's my tees. But I don't want them to think that way. I don't want them to have a litmus test based in three questions, whether they like someone I want them to find what they have in common. I want them to be curious. I want them to be critical thinkers. So going back to Vance, is there answer could have given you that you would have I mean, would you say basically is how far were you go for power and that was the most impactful thing, I think. Yeah, and that's because his book is about he admits he was seeking ambition for much of his life and I found that a rich admission because as the book goes on, you're kind of watching that play out in some of the subtext of how his life turned out, but it's also really hitting the question which I quoted back to him, but a tweet he made in twenty sixteen after the Access Hollywood tapes, which is Hey, fellow Christians, everyone's watching us apologize for this man. Lord, help us. I don't know I have exact, but it's around that thing And when I saw that, even though it was a ten year old tweet, the message is what captured what I'm saying. is Be his whole book then goes on to explain that his evolution was about how it's not just good people, it's good policy that you can get behind because he's a rabid prolifer and he has certain beliefs. And he felt by effectuating those changes in legislation and policy, he was doing his part in a Christian way. I would argue the how matters and that's what I was trying to get. Right. And he was implying that his perception of Trump had been manipulated by the media also. and there was a lot of actually when you watch it back because I've watched it several times now, there were a lot of implications that, you know media should not be trusted over and over again, just kind of woven into everything he's saying, which u I I agree there are avenues of media that shouldn't be trusted R. But there are also places to go An another part that was problematic, we couldn't get to in this segment, but he also opens his book up with a lot about how people's faith and belief systems are shaped by what he calls trusted sources, which are you don't go and verify the Bible go and check if certain things happened or didn't happen, you trust the Bible and you trust the ministers and the pastors and the priests or whatever faith you follow. Sorry, religious leaders and all this stuff As he's spelling it out in faith, I thought, and see, this is one of my problems with you. When you are a trusted source, you should carry that with the privilege and responsibility that that gives you, whichich is you're a trusted source for so many people in this country when you knowingly betray them about things like an election being stolen. President Trump himself said in front of Elizabeth Griffin, I can't believe I lost to that guy. Like people in his inner circle know he knows to be a part of that Messaging is to slowly degrade trust peopleeople trusted you. And I take that part very seriously. One thing I think that will help with trust is going into places where people disagree with you and you have to face honest questions. And I'm grateful that he did that yesday. And I'm grateful for you guys for asking tough questions. And there was a lot of discourse online saying that you know the ladies of the view held him to a higher standard than the White House Press Corps. And I don't know if that's true It was nice to read Well, I think the thing about our table, when you said people mention how did these segments come together, there are producers that help the flow of it because you don't want to jump from a Epstein to a book to like you're trying to kind of find a No one's asking a question that they don't feel strongly about. No, because the challenge the producer has is we bring what we care about and you'll notice We can care about more than one thing, but there' a certain ownership at a table of multiple people where the producer tries to honor your curiosity for that person. And when it overlaps, you guys figure out, you know, like I care about a lot of them. You care about Epstein very much, but like Sonny ask I do. And we h together' often say question, you know, I want to ask this question and they'll say, oh, we have that for so and so. I'm like, just as long as it's being asked. Absolutely.. Joy said yesterday about your question that you went for the low blow and brought up the kids. That made me laugh I love that that's what it. That's what she That's how she takes your heartfelt. Well, you know what it is is my brain works in finding what I have in common with someone. The differences are very clear, which Adie Vance of what we disagree on.. And it goes into policy, it goes into life decisions, it goes into a Thousand things. But But we do have a shared faith, and I don't care if it's the same faith. if you're a religious or faithful person with virtuous you know, outlook, then I'm I I align with you parents a lie, spouses a lie. There's a lot of things that JD Vance and I both have breaking point is how can you explain so much of your life and your decision making when you too turn to your kids and have and have to put your head down at night. And I just was curious, really genuinely curious and I wish you would have answered But wind is too far Where's the line for you? Now, maybe someone else ask again and maybe we'll get an answer eventually. Maybe. Today, I want to tell you about our friends at Czy Earth. Can you remember the best night of sleep you've ever had For me, oh, it was last summer and the Amalfi Coast. It was unbelievable. Ocean breeze and best sleep I've ever had. 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Get yourself the betting of your dreams. go to ABc secret saavings d. com slash BTT. for fifty percent off the best betedting you'll ever sleep on That's Acsecret saavings dot com slash BTT. Tomorrow morning is knocking. Stock your fridge now. How about a creamy mocha raappuccino drink? or a sweet vanilla? Smooth caramel maybe, orr a white chocolate moocha? Whichever you choose, delicious coffee awaits. Find Starbucks raappuccino drinks wherever you buy your groceries. We've had a big week this week like I mentioned, but the VP was exciting But I got toa tell you, maybe more exciting Jayalen Brunson was here on Monday and that was right on the heels. We were the first solo interview we did on a talk show after becoming the finals MVP and the Kicks, which means so much to you. Yeah winning the championship Did you watch I assume you watched the game? Where did you watch the game? So I watched my friend Jamie, she had a watch party. Oh great. And was it was really a close group of friends and all their kids that are also friends of various ages So she had a theater room. so we started upstairs around the food and everything and then slowly we like took over where the kids were and they the game was just adult, adult, adult, adult and the kids are like in the back. It was so special. and I think I think I've said this. I'm a Kicks fan. I love basasketball is my favorite sport to watch. The Kicks have and the liberty and They've been my favorite teams to watch I think what I've loved and I I almost wish we had the whole team because I think the best part of Jallen is he is very team minded. He's always talking about the team and so much of the beauty of this version of the Ks are those relationships, whether it's with his dad, who's a coach, whether it's with all the other teammates, He's someone that leads like a captain should. You know, and to watch them win the way they did to watch how tight those games are. The Spurs are an amazing team and they are the future of the NBA. The youngest team Webin Yama is kind of single handedly going to be he's going to be the face of the MA. He's going to be the face theB. if not for Jalen. So all of those things mean there's going to be a long road for them I wanted those games to be close because I think to see that level of fight is just awesome to watch This is now a rivalry, is It is a rival. Yeah. And I just it was fun because the last time I heard New York City screaming was a pandemic. when we'd go out on our porches and scream about the nurses and the doctors. And although that wasn't a unifying spiritual moment, we were also in a time of being apart and not going out and not connecting. So for scream be literally body surfing over everybody in blue and orange. aside from the violent responses, which disgusted me, you've lost the plot when you start attacking people and damaging things I'm not talking about those people the revelry of most like to be able to celebrate with my ten year old son as much as my husband, like was awesome. That's great. Yeah. That's great. Yeah, I couldn't get my girls into it yet, but I'm trying over and over again. I need I need a I need one of my kids to watch games with me. And honestly, once they do and learn a lot of the storylines, it becomes it's the people that make it They like they like going. Yeah. They like going, but I can't get them to sit on the couch and like hold in long enough. they lose interest very quick. Start telling them storylines. Like if you start doing, it's almost like Olympic profiles, I always thought when you get people's heart involved, it's not the team, it's not the numbers, it's not the stats Tell me the stories. tellell me the cinderella points in these people's lives. Tell me how got get into. Yeah. then you're pulling them in through their heart, not their eyes. Right. Yeahah. I'm gonna try with the giants and as the Yankees move closer to the playoffs, I'll try that. If you wantan to get me in on the giants and Yankees, I've got work to do over in that lane. I'm just next. All right, we'll see what we can do. Well I thought you were jets too now, right Jets you have friend connection, but I have to be giants because of Michael. Yeah, of course. So I've got a lot of ms. The fact you hosted a television show with Michael Strahan still don't watched one of the NickX games with Michael on acc cou. you're still not a giants, like you can't like, sit and watch I think I like the heart of lesser talent. Like when you're watching professional sports, you normally lose me on a lot of professional sports because I feel like Before all this endorsing in college came around, college teams were driven by heart. A lot of those people aren't going on to any professional sport. So it still was that extension of childhood when you played next to your friends. You would like Jamis Winston on the Giants. I gott to get you into him. Okay. Yeah. He's a back of a quarterback, but he's all heart. Jam Winst. Winston, done. Okay. All right. well, we'll talk about all this. and maybe get you in a fantasy league Okay, all right, that'd be fun. Okay, so Every act of change begins with a neighbor. When neighbors connect through the Feeding America network, small actions ripple into a lasting impact. Feeding America, led by neighbors. Give now to end hunger at feeedingammerica d. org d Youo there. 'is I, Queen Mortuana of the Night Realm, AKA Kate McKinnon. And her raaven minion Jojo, AK Emily Lynn. If you do not download and binge my show, heads will roll air apparent on audible, I will cut off your head. Oh no. Maybe just tell them about the guest stars like Richard Kind, Cerry Coon, Jimmy Fallon, at all. Vir They were in it. And if you don't listen to them, then I will cut off your tongue, then cut off your head, and then put the tongue in the head hole. A, you tried. Listen now exclusively on Audible and D of the audible after today are off with your head. I k You have a new TV obsession You're again late to the game as you are in all things. E Your new TV obsession is the real world. No I'm just telling you're not that late. Not that summer house. sumer house. Years later, you join the popular obsession after everyone else is done. Tell me how you got into this. So I may live in New York, but I'm still Iowan, which means there was a time without technology where it took about ten years for things to make it to the middle of the country. Yeah sure. So I'm right on time. A according to have arrived. Yes. We just got it. I got into summerhouse because there's aunch of people on the staff that are my friends that are obsessed. And when someone you love cares about something, it becomes contagious eventually. And Everyone got me watching this summer house reunion And so I watched it. But then I was so deeply invested. I hadven't watched last night, but I was so deeply invested that I went back to watch season ten. I've got a lot of feelings. We're aware dropped into Kyle Cook's DMs yesterday. Oh my God You called Cole Dem. Pre prettyty sure he hasn't read it. I'm buried in some kind of unfollowed Yeah like missed message. He gets lot of those, I'm guessing. I'm sure he does. Okay. But I needed to go on record. I mean, I really needed to speak up. My heart goes out to Kyle Cook and watching him has been very painful. Okay' only borderline following all of this but isn't he a villain? wasn't the guy everybody hated? So let me just be clear. I've only watched season ten. A lot of people seem to hate him, but I think I have fresher eyes because I'm not carrying a narrative. Okay. He broke up with his wife and he ended up with her best friend. No, not him, her herer best friend. No. so Sorry. so Kyle and West Yes are good friends. Yes. And Sierra and Amanda are good friends. Yeah. Amanda and Kyle marriedes, separate. Yes Amanda hooks up with her best friend's ex. Oh, so she's the villain. She's the villain. Okay. But what's worse is take away that affair altogether, which is really stealing all the headlines. Right. It's juicy, whatever it's bad all the things Just watch season ten and how Kyle Cook is treated by his wife People keep coming up to me that have watched for years my friends and they're like, yeah, but you don't understand. a lot of things happen. Alyssa was very anti kyle at one point. Yeah. and I get it. I even, I think came on the show once when we were talking about if your husbands to be a DJ and be out in the middle of the night and not be at home. Yeah, that sucks. Nothing merited the treatment he has gotten. It's bullying. It is absolutely bullying. And I say this with complete, I know it's funny. I know it's I'm getting really invested and I know I dropped into his DMs. But I actually was having a visceral reaction watching the group at times bullying Kle Amanda, his wife did things that I would never do to Maximax, would never do to me likeike the demeaning in front of people. She's in cliqus and groups where she's sitting around. her husband, there's the only married couple in the house. Her husband is there. She's making jokes at his expense. The whole group's laughing, even if it were benign jokes You don't make someone feel that way. You don't makes anyone feel that way, let alone your most intimate partner Get a divorce. They're not a good match. fine ture him. there are points where he's slurrrying and he's like I'm trying so hard and no one's hearing me. And I was like, I hear you, Kyle. L Is that what you wrote to him? I hear, Kyle.? Essentially it was a few paragraphs in he like, Oh my God, you wrote a book. The good thing is this is the one time I write a book to a guy that doesn't respond that I'm not trying to date. Yeah. But does Max know that you're in the other guys's the M's? No, he'd be like what the hell are you doing, Sarah But he'd probably actually also be like, of course you did Al she this is for like people I want to book on the show. Can we do that? Can we have you like Yeah, but you know what? L literally if you saw this, I need him to know that I see him Okay because And I know a lot of people are getting on bored, but I said, I just have to share how hard it's been for me to watch the season of Summer House. I'm a new convert to the series. So other than the reunion, I've only watched this season. I know that the West Amanda scandal has ruled the headlines, but I cannot endure how she has treated you. I know as a TV person that we don't see everything But I can't help but feel so bad for how you're treated And then when I went on to tell him he deserves so much more. and I had to tell him because I'm having a really hard time doing. I think we need to have you look direct to camera and say this is Sarah Hainnes' message to Kyle. And Kyle knows, I'm in his DMs. he just needs to find me. Okay Yeah, but I need him to know because honestly, it actually is making me the amount, how many times are we going to put that guy in front of a cama where he's like, she hates me. Does anyone see it? And I'm like, I see it, Kyle. everyveryone sees it, Kyle, like And I still have friends right making excuses for, you know, he was really a jerk in past seasason. I'm like there's no world in which you could tell me he did something We're bullying him slowly rather than just separating from him or addressing as a married couple the issue at hand rather than laughing with your friends. Like it's really sad and pathetic behavior that was cheered on because he stays up late and drinks too much and sometimes tells her to off. L Do you feel like you and Kyle, if you weren't married, would be a connection? No, no, no. I'm not attracted to him at all I have a lot of people I am attracted to, but not him. Not him. Josh Hart, I'm attracted to. Yes. Max knows, he's my best friend. I understand. Yeah. that's hilarious. I mean Anybody I'm attracted to all the next wee Yeah. Hello, it's fine. So we're good. But no, it's more because I can literally as an imppath feel his pain and I need him to know he's not crazy. what she's doing is not right and They should never have probably been together. I'm Keiana and I leveled up my business with Shopify. Once I figured out that Shopify was a thing, I never turn back. I can create a site with my eyes closed. Shopify thinks ahead of us, you know, and it thinks about the customer more than anything. Every day I'm thinking about some other new business, but Shopify is doing it to me because it's so easy to use. It's like I can't stop I'm addicted Start your free trial at shhopify d. com I don't know why this affects you so deeply. Did someone in a previous relationship treat you in this way No I don't no. I would never have I would never have stood for behavior. I mean so severely. There's a time where like Kyle It's not like shit. likeike I make fun of my wife. she makes fun of me and like we it's deeply like I knows with me. Let me troll him and everyone will be like poor you. likeike she walks off her only storyline. is marriage to Kyle and now her affair. So that's all she had anyway. but she was like waving the victim flag Well aying on a victim. Now, you mentioned storyline. I have to go back to the last thing you get caught up with very late, which was the reality show kind of Unreal? Yeah, Unreal, which kind of exposed reality shows as Chin know all fake Yeah I don't think you're still here though. you're still feeling this very deeply. Because of the way they clip it, again, I'm sure you can tell when a conversation I'm getting notes from the producers. Summerhouse is not fake. And I know it's not fake, but But what I mean is you can tell when they I can now identify when a conversation all of a sudden happens that they're trying to tie a storyline in, I can see a producer probably going Hey, go play Cornhole and ask him about that situation. I can tell when they're doing that. but the camera clips and what they're doing, there could be real I'm seeing enough out of their own mouths to see what's happening. and I going to go back and watch all those seasons and dig for whatever could have merited the behavior on this show. And so far, I have not. All. I think you need to not only do this, but also talk about it, blog about it. The summer House rewatch with Sarah Haynes, and I think it's important. I don't think anyone cares. I think after this, people are going to be concerned about your state of being I know, I know. and I'm not even going to cry I beyond I think people need to just take the affair out of their minds and stop because I think a lot of people go back and they're like, now I feel bad for Kyle because Amanda had an affair. Eerase the affair. I don't care about the affair. Amanda is acting inappropriately and demeaning. I don't like bullies. I do not like bullies. There's a sense of justice for people that are left behind and stepped on and Kyle has been destroyed and it's not fair You have to ask Amanda the JD Vance question. How do you speak to How do you reconcile your behavior? Well, I'm learning there's more coming out. People are sending me clips of things that I'm like, this behavior is not new for someone who does this. Now I have to I have to clarify here. Amanda did not have an affair Sorry, do I keep saying a fair? They have been separated since January. I say a fair because Married or not separated or not, you're sleeping with a Y. Y best friend's ex and your ex's good friend So All right last part of this, is that off limits in your mind? Could you let's say You become available. Any of Max's friends that that's off lits. You would never No, that feels like anything too close to Max feels right N agressive. Not even safe for me. L if you're separating from someone, It's like a It'nupt It's not financial,.'s just what you came in with, your friends are yours. I agree. My friends are mine. neverever the two shall meet. Agreed All right, we've covered a lot today. I know. This is really world peace. Yes and peace for Kyle. I'm not sure what you were most passionate about between Kyle Jady Vance and Jaylen Bruns. Ns Go next now. Go goo to Sope All right, thank you for joining me today, Sarah Haynes. Tomorrow, I'll be back with Anna Navarro, always a crowd pleaser. We'll see you then