Threevia Trivia Game and Results

Lemonder. But this episode is sponsored by Better Help You know what's weird about summer, besides that white party the Loch Ness monster throws every year? No, it's this. everyveryh year, I'm like, this is going to be the sumhere I relax. And then suddenly I'm somehow stressed in a different seasonal font There's all this pressure to maximize summer travel plans, activities, sunsets Sun sets Meanwhile, sometimes just want one quiet afternoon and maybe an iceed coffee the size of your head That's a lot of coffee gang Like is it the circumference of your head too? Like a sort of little barrel of ice coffee. Wow Fs up Anyway, therapy can help you figure out what you actually need and feel more comfortable setting boundaries around your time and energy. It's important, I speak from experience. You don't say yes to everything this summer. findind support in therapy. Sign up and get ten percent off at betterhelp dot com slash freedom. That's betterhlp dot com slash freedom When twelve year old Jewules stumbles into a time machine, an unexpected journey begins T turns out, our planet looks different in the year twenty one hundred Cyclones, poison tides, and alGOs for breakfast. But how do we get here Can we turn back the clock That's up to you Plate safe or risk it all as a member of the Midnight Rebellion. available wherever you listen Yeah I woke up a luxurious nap. Threead ' them in the morning, Th them in the evening, Th them at supper. Suer time. Yeah, I six What after evening? What is the difference between supper and dinner Supper, I think, used to be what people called lunch. No They're s. There snow they. And I think it varies from place to place actually. They used to call it luper. It's an evening meal, typically a light or informal one Okay, so I could invite people over for a separate party Yeah you sit on the floor. Shesays crriscross up supper A supp party A slumber party. I'm at for a supp party. I would invite them for a slumber party.'ve never invited someone to a supper party if I thought you said slumber party And they brought their sleeping bag and I'm like, Oh my Godd, why if you did that? You're so embarrassing right now But let's go get in your sleeping bag. Well, sure. You showow up in pajamas with a sleeping bag and everyone is dressed to that Well, no, they wouldn't be dressed up because it's a supper. It's formal short sleeves. But they short sleeves. Short pants. Yeah, short pants. ye. shhort hair. donon't care. You have to cut your hair short if you're invited to a supppper party. That's right It's part of the rules. I'm having a lunch party I'm a lunch You know what? afterfter having Holly's birthday party, which was like a morning This is embarrassing. Wh's Holly again? Okay, she's my kid Uh after having We had our birthday from ten to one U yeah And it involved bagels and fruit and whatnot. And I was like and donnuts. And I was like, this, I would do this with friends. Like morning get together have bagel. Could we add some like eggs and bacon and You wantan to do a whole breakfast? You wantanna do the thing where you cook breakfast for everyone? Like d' a pandem. I wantan to do motel breakfast this. That's right I remembered one thing he said. I want to do motel breakfast. Yeahotel cereal bar. Disgusting eggs. Yeah Fruit loops and sausage patty that tastes like a shoe. f lips in a plastic can like Jar or bowl. We'ess in a plastic jar? I was staying. I was sing in a pretty pedles babbe. in a like in a hotel in Arizona A years back in fire. They had a pancake it makeake your own pain You know what? I've been to a hotel like that and that was really fun. You could also make your own waffles But I don't want to I know. I don't even want somebody else to make them for me.ight? You don't passast pancake or a wafflegg. reallyally? No pancakes or waffles ever again. It makes me feel so bad. Yeah.'m so heavy. It is heavy, but I love pancakes. I love crepes. What about half a panckake No you're talking. Is that allowed? I don't think I know they're round ew What do you feel about pancake for the table? What if I ate out the middle of the pancake? you just ate it? Yeah. ye. I proudly say that. I'm not ashamed Wait what do you feel up? You're not a soprano. What if I ate A pancake for the table When you're out for breakfast. P cake for the table. Yeah. Everyone gets whatever they want. t silver dollar p big ass oneack and everyone can grab a couple bites. Now I'm on the record with I don't like to go out for breakfast. Yeah. I want itiod I want it. You're in the congressional record regard. Yes. Yeah. I'm in the library of Congress. I wrote book about it. a veryy slim volume.. It's only two pages. It's a very big v. Extremely slim. But yeah, like to I like to eat right away. and a thing I hate is like If you're traveling with people and they say, Ohh, we have to go to this breakfast place. And then you all slept over there and wait in line for an. I don't want to wait in line for breakfast. No, dear. you'll wait in line for lunch Well I live h. I really won't wait in line for any meal at this point I figured out I figured out by the way.ike what are we doing? Now, if you're waiting for a reservation That's different. It's different because it's not on a line. Yeah. You're in the restaurant, they're like, wouldould you like to go over the bar and get shit? That's drunk. That's fine. So if you go in and wait, you can't go over to the bar. Anyway, I figured out by the way, the other day why we were talking about why we eat fast Yeah, I think it's because I'm always eating right before I have to do something like today That is I was shoing shhoveling it into my mouth going, fuck they're gonna be here. Fuck they're gonna to be here. Now you guys were twelve minutes late? Yeah, And I could take my timees. It was literally six minutes. looked twelve min I looked at my. Yeah Oh, but you're over to those skies where ten minutes early is on time. Exactly. Yeah. One time is late. But see you live here And so you're always on time Not really. I'm always that's what I mean. I'm always shoveling food in my face going like, o, no, the guests are going to be here. I gota get because I got something throwing me. I had to walk the dogs today. unscheduled and so usually they walk at what time U eleven or so.ven when their bowels and bladder are full. Yes. Yes. And then this time it was a delayed reaction Uh no, we cool up and I switched. Shes the bodies? Yes. Oh A you cool up? Oh, that's why this is going so well Come on. I didn't make a boob joke you miss your boobs? You miss them? No, he misses mine. Okay, I'm confused. Well now yeah he's a has Yeahah, he has been So he must be happy, I guess Oh guys I I have a new this is one of Scott's classic Oh guys. Oh G guys. T time for an O guys. Is this Laurence topopics? I have a new u u found dog story Wow. Okay, sly Previously on three d, I've had three previously on three them. I've had three experiences finding Lost dogs. N none of them satisfying The first one. By the way, this is I feel like this is the first time you. I've heard of a saving a dog Sving. Okay. let me remind you of the three times and you'll remember. Okay, so all I've heard of is your cowardice in the face of lost dogs. C you see a lost dog? What are you doing here? Where can it be? Where's your owner So the first time I was driving with Kulop, we saw a dog by the side of the road, got out of the car, picked it up There was a phone number, No one answered. I left a message. U teexted as well this No one no one ever answered U I said we're over here, you know, I gave the cross streets. I said we're here. pretending to remember this now About ten minutes later, a guy' walking down the street on the phone. And in the middle of a conversation And he kind of like raises his arm and I'm like Is he waving to us? This can't be the guy waving to us. He's on the phone We But I get out of the car going like, are you? He grabs the dog, never gets off the phone. That's right. Does a one hundred eighty just walks away. That's That's completely insane. Yeah. Either not say thank you. Either a fucking asshole or a dog thief Myose are your options. To be charitable, I feel like hes He was a fucking asshole? I feel like the dog must get out all the time or something. Yeah, but it doesn't mean you don't know that. I know. And I was And by the way, we were on our way to something and then like you were in black tie.. You would have just let the dog go and it could have been hit by a car.'s true But I do, but I think we all understand that frustration of like that overtakes you where it's like you're so upset with the object of the frustration, the dog. Yeah. that you forget common manners. Exactly. yeah. That's how I felt. Sure Or he was just a total fucking lunon addict U, So then the next two times were the same dog. And That's down like And that was the little girls The little girls I and the dog is not that far like three houses away, but and just kind of like standing there frightened looking And I found the dog, I took it up to the door and they were just like, what? Oh getet in here, you know, just kind of mad at the dog and like and kind of gave me a cursory like thans and just like in the midst of the like the mom going. I told you not to let the dogs, you know, I was like, fuck I didn't bother. Okay. and then it happened twice and I was like third time This must be the charm. Yeah, but they moved away. want the charm. They've moved away, so I'll never know. Third time Shame on the Chm. Fourth time, Chm on the shhame U So T the doy Well, Please Dooby Well So this time I get a text from Coolp and it says, Can you come upstairs And I go upstairs and there is a little tiny dog just shaking like a leaf in our bush up there right by where you guys enter I'm sure they're breread box sized. G like a tiny bread in a restaur or a regular size in a restaurant. Bread box in a restaurant. You know, one that has like, I know I know it's serious So little tiny Dog is just shaking, shaking, shaking. Coolup is trying to coax it out, but it won't it won't come out because too afraid We I sort of get on the other side and we're blocking it, but neither of us can reach Uh, and just oo afraid to come out I swap with Cool up and I She's like it's gonna to bite you, it's to you. I, Oh, I think it's okay. and I grab the collar and U It's okay. and and we got a leash, I put on the leash and after it's on the leash, it's like fine. This is all I ever wanted. Oh than God, I'm controlled by man. What kind dog I don't know. I'm not great I'm not great at breeds. Yeah, probably but we'll justve mud so I don't have to specifimy. Mud is my favorite breed. I love it. I love them mud love them. So I call theirs drive me nuts Do you have a bumper stick? T Tight muts, driving nutets, what So I call the number. And u S someone answered the phone Hello. And I'm like, Hi, do you have a dog named Piper And she goes Yes. And I'm like, oh, we have her How many pieces is the dog usually? What? I'm just kidding. What L likeike we have her, everything's okay. She's just burst into tears. She's in Hawaii where the fires are. Oh on vacation and has been like scrambling trying to get a flight back like these both of these things happened at the same time. Oh my. This dog ran away from the fires from Hawaii. It has that could have since paddled on. Oh, I thought it was here, but it got scared of the fireres there. and no no. What if a dog cast away? had like a tennis ball that was it's Wilson That's's proportionately smaller. Yeah. And it just kind of constantly chased it and finally chased it off the island And what it gave it gave up on the ball What if a dog gave birth to a ball? Oh my God. This is a movie. It was a golf phall and it talked And it said Tiger W is my dad So Tyer Woods had sex with the dog. Yeah. The dog gave birth toaco golf. That makes sense. His seam at this point is golf balls. It's as big as golf. No, it's golf teas and it makes golf balls. That's like if if you gave birth to a big sperm. He has high teeth TSIT. Hi Tiger Woods. Yeah. G. Hi te time Thank you time. Anyway, so she yes, the dog is with her friend. got away at the same time the fire started happening. and And the frame came within like three minutes and the dog had been missing for twenty four hours or so. like all night. The last spotting of it was some construction people saw it being chased by coyotes. Oh Jesus That was hours before Harrowing adventure. Yeah, yeah, Harrowing Rbsy like adventure. But who are these how do we know this? How did they construction peopleople saw this happen goingo up and down the streets going have you seen this dog? Have you seen this dog? And some construction workers were like, Ohh yeah, we saw it just up down the street. So that woman was definitely very scared that her dog was eaten So ye E out like puls it. Oh my God L a big pancake. Center out of theace. Like a big pancake. Yeah And then we a friend of ours had had we found had Instagram posted about the dog. So it was someone that we know No, I kept seeing posts about this dog. Probably not the same way. Okay different dog. But anyway, so it was it was and they were very grateful and it was it was it was one of, you know, it's what you want out of this experience of like, you know, you take the time someomeone cares. Take the time at yeah, someone cares about this dog. Yeah. Yeah. Can I tell you This has reminded me. I have had three experiences dog leading me to its house. because it got out of the house and couldn't get back in. Wow. And you said Here boy, leave me to your house. Itlic. T me where your mommy lives Show me where your mommy lived. Shake where your mommy g. The dog, in each instance, the dog came up to me and then started to like try to lead me somewhere and Bake Like it was kind of going, hey over here Like how like how a dog will be like want you to get a ball that's under the couch like Yeah Yeah. it would like it would like kind of come up to me and like putut its legs up on my legs And then start walking and then turn back and look at me like did the child, right? And we did the child step. the commomercial, where's the dog dance Yeah, I think that's a lot of them. And s the one I'm thinking of It's only one. It's only one comp. The one I'm thking is only one country. I'm thinking of one, I'm thinking of bun trade. I'm thinking of a multiverse of commercial.'king I'm just thinking of the idea of a commercial. I'm thinking of a golden retriever Okay, that is on a tine legs doing like a I'm thinking of a black and white dog that's like on a tine legs doing kind of like To the left now, y'all One half this time. To hops this time Mereng dancing Golden Retriever. Thank you. Oh no, it's just a video. It's not a comm. Oh. It's just a dog. It's just a. That's just a dog that can do that. It's not an interesting. That's just a sentent dog who learned how to dance human style. And wears outfits and not interesting. It's not selling anything. He's just doing here for this love. If it's not for breezes, I don't want to hear it. And there was one so the first time it happened was like a little dog who l me back to its house and then I knocked on the door and I got a fl horse. Oh Topkins. I'm outside the house now. That's what you said Yeah. I was just playing my tpe tell you the story. It's a tape I just played a tape You've been taping Paul this entire time? I have all doorbell footage accessible to me. All doorbell foot accessible to me And the owner was like, Ohh my Godd, what did you How did you get out? thank you so much blah blah Second time, bigger dog who is very enthusiastic Let me back and then he was just a maniac. Here's my question. whyy don't they just go back because they need you to be theer locator. They want to yes, they want to get They want to cushioned the push confrontation with the owner. Yeah. Yeah they're like you're not gonna you're not gonna to yell at me for him, right? That's a stranger. And then the third time was a dog that lived right next to us, who was coming up to me and then walking away and looking at me and I'm like, what is your what you see The gate was open, like the tiniest little b needed the gate. The dog was like, I can't get through there I feel like I've told the story, but there was one time where Mike and I saw the most like Tunish looking dog where like it had two eyes going in separate directions and like a tongue hanging out. He was wearing a hat and a tie. It looked insane and it was just sitting there and like I just was like, what's going on with this dog? It looks bananas. Are we in the Sunday? And we were like arere we supposed to do something about this? I don't like Are you a protol problem? We like walk or anything you see.alked around the corner. We' got this plan. Are we supposed to do anything about? back and it was gone and we were like, did we just make that up? Like it felt so insane. I've never seen a dog that looked like that in my life. And you've never seen. I never saw it again. It was just gone. And I was like, Well, it sounds like a hallucination It Were you tripping? I was mushroom. It was tripping balls. I forgot. But my side too Mike so too. So too H his also beough? Yeah, and maybe he just suck because that' describing it. It's funny that when you see a cat wandering around, you're like, who cares? But if you see a dog wandering around, like you must emerg. I do feel like I think the cat knows what it's doing. L I'm like, either you're somebody's cat or but my cat has gotten a friend in peace had got loose a handful of people. Right. I had a friend whose cat came back after three months It it's too long. Yeah, that is too long. It's kind of like that is always wild to me. My kind of dog that ran away for like It was then taken to another family and then like came back and it was like a year later. How did it fly this way back? Um I don't I got loose from them and then like came back to their h. I don't live with you And then how did how did did the family I think the story' is not adding up. It's not becausecause I'm telling it badly. It adding up. Why are you lying? Their dog ran away, was taken it was gone for many, many months years. I don't know, and it was taken by another family and they found out later that it was. and how did they find out about the family? Let me just get Mike on the horn and we'll get this cleared up Okay, so what happ Hi, hey, it's my. Hey Polly. Hey M Py. Good to hear. Okay, I asked you not to do this. Hey, Poy Ws. All right. Hey, what's up? Hey Laurn, baby. I love you. I love you. Let's talk later. All right. So Mike this dog definitely talk later. Okay. So Lauren was trying to tell the story and she was failing miserably about this dog you had that ran away got taken by another family. thenen you got the dog back. Yeah How did it all happen Okay, so I left the gate open Okay, so it's on you Yeah, I'm the gate guy in the family. and you failed your job. Yeah, that's one thing I had to do all day and I was asleep at the sw all day all day. I like now And B' a kid Yeah, I was a kid. I was three years old tryge to the gate And this dog gets away and lives with another family for months and months and months. Right And we had put up flyers everywhere. like have you seen this do? Aet signcience Yeah. well, I mean, what's the difference between a sign and a flyo really? when you I mean, those sign really big Yeah Well quality. We wanted it to be a sign, but we only had fly of material paper V exact. We't have c st. Classic l. Yeah. So. story' really long. Four colors Four colors, man.. But we could mix them together to make purple and all.. So within the rules of those four colors, you could mix them together to create other colors. Oh yeah, yeah, but nothing nothing special, like pinks or anything like that. No, None take it. Purple's not special. Pink is special. Pink, you'd need to add white to Hi Barbie. Hi Barbie. So Ken H. I was just Who are you talking to? Somebody in Kid? Yeah. I oughta come over there and bust you right them out. Let's hang up on him. What? He a Billy Joel heart attack on onn the way out? He does that. It's kind of his thing G Samantha. All right, we have to take break. Okay This episode is sponsored by Better Help Oh, I always forget this summer is somehow both relaxing and incredibly chaotic at the same time. Like in my mind, summer is me sitting peacefully outside with a drink and a light breeze But in reality It's me sweating while trying to coordinate seventeen different schedules and pretending that's fun There's this weird pressure to have a good summer, to make memories, be social, travel, sayay yes to everything, Enjoy every sunny day. and suddenly you're exhausted by July And I think sometimes we forget that taking care of yourself is also a productive use of summer. Therapy can help you better understand what you need, set healthier boundaries, and stop feeling like you have to do absolutely everything, which honestly feels like a valuable skill year round, but especially in summer, when everybody suddenly wants plans all the time. BetterHelp has over thirty thousand licensed therapists worldwide and has served more than six million people globally. They match you with a therapist based on your preferences, and if the fit isn't right, you can switch therapists at any time You don't have to say yes to everything this summer. Find support in therapy Sign up and get ten percent off at betterhelp dot com slash freedom. That's betterter HLp d. com slash freedom Here's a little trivia about summer. Summer always changes the way I want to dress. Now that sounds like it's tricky about me but it's not The second gets worm out, I w to stop wearing anything complicated or uncomfortable. I just want pieces that are light, easy. And somehow make it look like I have my life together And that's why I've been loving Quince lately. They have really beautiful elevated basics, linen, organic cotton, washable silk, all those fabrics that immediately feel nicer the second you put them on Now, Quince has been a friend to me. 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And for years, I just accepted that my phone bill was going to be weirdly expensive for no reason Every month it was like, okay, here's your bill, plus mysterious fees, plus charges me to hope you don't ask about. And I'd be like, I guess that's phones Idiot eventually it was like Be this wayay And that's why Mint moobile makes so much sense to me They exist to stop people from overpaying for wireless just because thiss h's always been Min Mobile offers premium wireless plans, starting at just fifteen bucks a month and all plans come with high speed data plus Unlimited talk and text on the nation's largest five G network Now look. My dear friend, Matt, Padaka. He's got a Mint mobile plan. And this guy's rubbining in my face every time I see him He's always saying like, o, I was able to bring my own phone and number, activate it with ESM in minutes, and avoid the whole painful wireless store experience entirely. Oh, I'm still getting reliable coverage except now my phone bills financially ruin my mood once a month. And I'm like, okay, man, I thought we were friends. Why are you talking to me like that Jealous. If you like your money, Mint mobile is for you Sop plans and mintMobile d. com slash freedom. That's mintMobile d. com slash freedom from payment of forty five dollars for three month, five gigabyte plan required, equivalent to fifty dollars a month. New customer offer for first three months only and full price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra, C Mint moobile for details And hello. Speaking of Samantha. Oh yeah. Yeah. Lauren, I was listening to the old with special guest, Lauren Lapkas. Yeah, where you you and the wild horses d. Oh yeah, that was a fun seex in the city. It's so funny. That was fun. Thanks. Really funny. How are you accessing that? I just still had it on my phone. I kept a few. I kept a few. nice Yeah. yeah, at some point get some backup of my patreon. Yeah you gotta do it. I know I'm waiting to get the files actually. I'm waiting for some files myself. He waiting for files. waiting for a fil. Do you have any compliments for me, Paul Yes, Scott. I He's around the room. I love being in this room. It What is that huge stack of art books that are all sealed U, there's seal Sieal biographies? Yeah What does that mean? Behind the scars Seal wrote a biography of some Seals No really what is it They're books. But why are they all new because they're new Why did you get them Because I bought them. So you bought a bunch of art books? I'm curious. are they? Are they art books? Are they They' not like novel collectiones? There's one called Nunning Y fucking' Business that you would love. I should seeround your hobbies and today. All right, I'll stop I'll stop right now Everything's fine Everything's fine. Everything's fine. What'd you guys do this weekend Oh God, what did I do? I was in Portland, Oregon. I did a varietopia up there. It was great H a wonderful time. The hotel ran out of hot water What? Oh no. guy went door to door. door to door saying, Hey, our boiler just broke. Oh That sucks. Yeahes. And What did you do? just I took a cold shower guys I just got to do it suck. There was I felt like there was enough Tiny residual warm water right. They really hot as well outside. Yeah. Right. So I made it through and it was relatively painless, but it it suck getting in there. It was also one of those showers where the shower head is fixed, like you can't adjust it. Yeah. So there's no way to not get in freezy cold water Yeah There's no way to like turn it to the side a little bit. Yeah have it just go e out. But I heard an interesting thing in the airport. What's thatll Out of my way, fucking birke. I was so fascinated by it I thought how interesting There was a father and two kids walking through the airport They were behind me and I heard the little girl say, What happened to Henry And the father said What happened to Henry? Well, he grew five inches, he got a table saw and he opened his own business. Excuse. Grew five inches. Okay, let's break this down. So this was a child who somehow acquired a table saw and to open a business. Yeah like Encyclopedia Brown, like table sawing for grade school kids. Maybe it was a guy who got that surgery where you get taller Maybe, but I wouldn't say to be if I were a father, I would not explain it to my child as he grew five inch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't want to give them unrealistic expectations. Yeah that when you're like forty, you can grow five inch. Yeah. So maybe he didn't grow in height. something else grew in five in Like what hair? His hair is five years longer. say say you take the back you go backwards and a guy who jes back. who used to work with the father in their table saw business or whatever. Okay so it's a guy he used to work with. Why would he grow five inches And why is that necessary to the story? Wait wait wait How did taking that back? Go going with the last the last piece of information first in other words. Yeah like he opens his own business. Oh, this is a guy that the father he used to work with. Right. Okay. So then the previous you're saying why did he open with He grew five? Yeah, like what how are those connected? It is the most interesting thing. I would just leave it at that Right Oh, he grew five inches. was at the end it was like God, I would say he grew five inches. But I think there was something that needed to be explained about the rest of that. one hundred percent, but the daughter seemed to have no further questions. She was fine with it. Yeah He grew five inches, got a table saw and opened a business. If you know how just the update from when he was saw him when he was twenty eight. We haven't seen him in twenty years. but what happened to him? Well, he grew five inches, he got a table saw and opened a business. That's all you need to know. I mean and this child was small. so how old could Henry have been? Yeah That the child would remember who Henry was, wouldould inquire whatever happened to him 'rapping the hell out This feels like So what's the business that you open with just a table saw? I don't know. Table saw here. What What if it's a children's book What if it is a boring children's book? The guy who bought one table? No, it's about like a little tiny little guy and it's like bought one table saw And he has no prospects. And then then the story ends, and then the daughter goes, whatever happened to Henry? Well, he ended up growing five inches. Henry? He got a table saw. He got a table saw and he opened his own business Whatever happen it and no no like Henry Wh Oh no, dad knew exactly who Hry Dad knew who Henry was. He knew what Heidi used to be and what Heidi is now Maybe it was her invisible friend she stopped chucking in on. That would be great She stopp checking the dads still see you. Oh yeah, we still hang out. Which suppose you guys don't hang out? doesn't mean I. I have to keep this up now. Jesus. So that's what I That was the most interesting part of the weekend for you Didn't say that. H The show was a lot of fun. R Really good time doing. But it pales in comparison to the Henry story. Well, it's something that's haunted me ever since likeike Henry himself. Oh no, he right behind. No. He continues to grow. And has a buzzaw right behind. I think my most interesting thing is that I went to a two year old's birthday party. And it was very nice. And Cake like a recycling bin full of trash because the kid loves trash. The kid loves trash. I love shit like that. it reminds me of my U nephew I used to reminds me of my trash can. It's full of trash. And it's trash day My nephew used to hang out with No, not good' not Differe one. Diff different nephew. used to hang out with me. We don't often talk about a different nephew. Second tier nephew. Second tier, yeah Definitely below like fourth on the call she She. definitely below Definitely below. definitely below. D Definitely cry. Was hanging out with my dad for a while, like they would, you know, he would watch him. and grandpapa. They went to the dump one day and they still talk about it. He came back saying like, I w to work at the dump and they never forgive my father for it. Oh But that's so cute. S gott to work if they don't. And little kids really love trash, like not all of them, but a lot of lot of little kids really get excited about the garbage dragon. Do you think that's why Oscar is so grouchy kids are always trying. I' not into kids and it's like, I wish kids were not so interested in my life. That should be part of his thing. Yeah. because don't look. Would ask the Groud help you count or was he just a guy who was like irritated? He would teach you about gout. No the count is the count. Sure But you know how almost everything in Sesame Street has to have some sort of lesson attached to it. His was like, don't talk to assholes or something. Yeah. If someone lives in a trash can, leave them alone So I guess it was just like It was learning how to deal with things that make you grouchy or. Yeah, or deal with I honestly don't know. I don't eith.ay it just like, Hey, wouldn' it funny we threw an asshole in there? Yeah. You gota have someone who's not all sunshine and rainbows. I thought they were all assholes. The No, arere you kidding me? Yeah. Big bird snuffle up again. This bird is great Bird Nicest people. But B's a little more angry, I think. He's quicker he's quicker Do you know why though? Because Bernie Ernie Bernie Bernander. these Bern pros.on't leave me alone. No, but Bernie Eernie's couple name is Bernie. Yeah. That's that's their couple portmentento. Yeah Ernie is a fucking asshole. Yeah. Ernie does Yes, he does stuff just. He's really selfish. He's chaotic. he's like he's just a creature of whim. and it's frustrating to. Well, like one time he's practicing the fucking trumpet at night when bird's trying to sleep. Yeah. O Are you sure it's at night though? 'cause I remember this. It could have been during the day was like taking a nap. It still. You know what I mean? That's rude. But but how are you to know if your roommate is taking a nap if the roommate doesn't say like, by the way, I'm in my room How do we know that he didn't do that? They share a room. they have beds right next to each other. That's true. That's right. That's tr So anytime he want to play the trumpet, he's got to peek inside their bedroom and say I kind of think anybody who has a trump lives with other people should check and see what's going on first before he start tooting on that thing. You're not going you're not going to absolve Ernie in this in this situation. Yeah.'s he's wrong. Israelkay. Also, he didn't even stick with the trumpet Yeah, you never seen play it again, do you? It like it's not like then cut to three years later. he's real virtuous. so ye. Someone I know had a neighbor in an apartment building who would s Well, s. Okay. Oh, there's more. Who would sing all the time And' she was a fantastic singer. Yeah, we had like an opera singer. Yeah mean she was like a Broadway person or something, but yeah which I mean is ultimately pleasant, I would say, as far as loud singing goes, but just at all hours of the day at night just like loud singing. Does your neighbor also do that? No, I mean it was fine for. L I would never really get too upset about any kind of noise because you know, one of the you know, agreements that you make. Yeahah, when you're that's one of the four agreements. Yeah. onene of the four. Yes. youll be. Other people be impecful with your word. Other people make noise. Other people make noise Be on time And never ever fall in love? Oh I did with. I did three of those Okay, You beat impeccable with your word. You be beat impeccable. You were always on time. You made a lot of noise. Don't listen Well, otherther people make noise. That's one of the rules. You other people make noise. You other people made noise. And then you didn't fall in love I never fell in love in my life. I was at Riley Riley where I lo Ky song which one I never find I name it family. Wh Why do you imitate her like I could do the b. The fruit Yeah. I can imit, but I never find enough de things like that. And again nowail that There's someone in my neighborood who has a Ryl O Kyly license plate like a vanity plate. is it Ryo Ky.'s deep The whole band I mean, yeah Yeah. It in one car. One guy in it was on Salute your shorts, which was a classic show I Niclode when I was kid. Wait, Okaykay, so like what's your name? Jamie L My old band wa? She was she was a child She was trueverlyills, right? Child actor. Were they all child? I don't think so. I think he was maybe even added to the band later, I'm not sure T all four of them. than But I don't think it was. I think I think about that Quite sure. They were also about that. All that? It's about that. It's About that was the sequel to all that. Yeah Ab that Aout that. That was all about that, but u about that Why was there a show called a bag of chips? They'reort but. We should create It's a really missed opportunity. What if we cateed about a sentient bag of chips? Y. And it goes and visits the all that also A bag of chips. It's about a living bag of chips. The show's called a bag of chips. What are you looking at, Lauren? My water bottle cap has something in it. A message? Yeah, Oh my God. Eat a pancake out, you dumb hoe Nice. No, it just had a little bit of you know, something in that I'm not too excited about to see, I would say. Oh, like a spider? A little bit of dirt or something. I I'm thin about something you said earlier that you celebrated Holly's birthday from ten to one or something. Her birthday party. Her birthday party. Yeah. But it is funny to think that for a kid Their birthday is only that amount of time Pretty much. They're not aware all day that it's their birthday. Yeah, yeah, ye for a long time. Yeah. We're going to a birthday party next month that starts at nine thirty and I was like, there thing No'm like No I'm like, this is great I'm like, Yeah n thirty AM. Yeah. I'm like, what else are we doing? What time do you typically wake up? At least seven, if not earlier. Scott same question It has to be seven at the latest. Yeah. seeven at the latest. Yeah because of U but because of like nap schedules and. Yeah, yeah I mean this morning was it was It was my turn She started babbling at three, which wokke me up. It a little. It's a bit early. But A bit early. She went back to sleep, but I couldn't get back to sleep. I finally got back to sleep at five and she woke up at six hundred thirty. More babbling, I presume. No, like this was true. like I want out for half hour Um, yeah I think I think the celebrating a birthday all day That's fine, but lately people talking about their birthday week. Oh, their birthday months. children. Come on children. Come on This is my birthday month. Yeah. they use it as an excuse for like terrible behavior as well. Yeah. what because they can do whatever the fuck they want. Well this is straight out of rules Really? Okay, it always t. Tell us. people in the early mirrred in the f few seasons Lionary In the first few seasons, especially There's a lot of episodes that cent around people's birthdays and how important they are. And these people are in there ies Well you know what I mean? This reminds me of like it's the kind of thing and Koolp had a few of these when we were dating of like up til you're about twenty three or something, like when you have your birthday, it's time to invite every single person you know to I think past twenty three. I think that goes up until a few years before thirty. Really? The people still do that. Yeah. And now it's like when people do that after thirty for just like random birthday, not like a milestone. Right? What are you doing? Come on, man. I don't want to go to the Eden D like I didn't do restaurants. It's always there. I know. No, I would always that place was really popular. I would do like, u bars, like just a bar. That's fine. And then I would for my thirtieth, I had a dinner with like That's okay too for a thiren. Yeah, But like but what I'm talking about are these ones where it's like invite everyone you know to a sit down dinner. Not everyone knows each other. Yeah Oh and men And then everyone has to figure out how to split the check because everyone knows bke because you're your thirtiet. y. Yeah. My thirtieth birthday, I remember spent at the drawing room one of the most hideous bars in all of Los Angeles. the drive I'm trying to picture it. It has a sign that says open at seven AM. Oh yes. It's on Hillhurst. Open at seven AM. Is every goke? There's there's a great bar in San Louis Aispo that's open at six AM. and everyone who would graduate from Cal State would like esssentially It would close it two and open at six. And everyone would try to keep drinking past two on their own in order to have like the first beer at six AM on the night they graduate. That's gross Why? Yeah, I guess I guess it's a curious thing to say. I I'm asked like that, I don't know how to answer. And so I guess there's nothing gross about it. Somebody once pointed out that there are people that work night shifts that for them they like have wind down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. that's interesting. you're gonna to go sleep all day anyway. Yeah, you finish your work day at, you know, seven AM, then you go to a I mean you you're just completely flip flopped to also wait So in New York is it four AM that bars closed? I can't recall. Oh my God. someome of them, I think stay open uil five. Can they stay open u tntil five, but then ye when when like why is there even just one hour that something's closed? Good question, ma'. You know what I mean? Everything should be open Yes. every business Every business Everything in a table saw business. Every Henry Henry said. Yeah, Henry, a message to you Henry more scope Yeah ye. He knows He knows it. He knows what I'm saying Cool. I was listening to a podcast about Braille the ninety nine percent ninety percent invisible. I' very popular. I'm not a listener, but now I am a fan because we list to do a couple of episodes today. G And it wass really interesting. I'm not going to try to explain Braille but I would recommendind the episode. I think I get it. No. You don't. it's bumps, It's bumps. There's a history of those bumps, my guys. Oh, donon't want to hear it. Okay. I'm just glad the bumps are there. I don't want to know how the bs are made. It started as acing, right? Yeah. Reality recap? Yeah, though, really quick.' be eating on your face that you're disgusting. Reality recap I was on bitch sash lastk And You did another podcast? Yeah we agreed we were gonna to appear in any of other podcasts. You know what? Drive our numbers up. All right But I casually brought up welcome to Plathville, a reality show on TLC. And neither of them had seen it. Casey, Wilson and Daniele Schneider And That set them off on a thing where they basically realized how amazing the show is. Is some they're doing a podcast all about it, which I think people should check out if you like to. Is it a sister wife type of show? It's a family in Macon Georgia not it's no, it's less common It's Caro, but it's spelled like Cairo. Wow. Georgia. Cairo. It's a really small town and it's um And the family is very sheltered and religious, but then the kids, you're basically catching this family where like the kids are going to be teens and some of them are venturing into the world. And some are you see how naive they are and then you see some of them trying to be a little bad. and then one of them is still really religious and like praise in a closet for all of them. And then a hand movement You were like whipping just sort of doing. And then over time, you see that the parents then get divorced, which is like and it's happenpping more recently and it's so insane. and now the dad went from being this like sort of like, um, Boba Duke figure, no what Boba Duke figure what? Who's the tall guy? He Wh's the tall guy?'s Shane in the basement, who wears a top out From me it follow Why can' I think of? Why can't I think of It all guy, Lurch. Wishmaster. The scary thing for the spaghetti. Phantasm guy? The scary thing for the spaghetti What's the creepy pasta?oyD. Creey pasta. Oh, Kevin the murderer is? The one that I've referenced so many times and I can't think of it for some reason, heays really, really tall. The Slenderman. S Who's the tall slender guy? went from like Slenderman vibes and he's like really creepy and so he's like smiling to then now he's like buff as hell. and it's like kind of hilarious So I have to catch up because they're more caght up than I have now. I Remember when that happened to John and Kate pllus eight guy and he started wearing Ed Hardy everywhere Yeah anyway, so it's a fun show. if anyone's looking for something crazyy to binge. Yeah All right, if you're looking for something crazy to binge, that is Lauren'. That's myreck. M. Welcome to Pliffville. Yes. And The last name is Plath. and so that's why it's called That's o Okay I'm sitting here going Where's Platville? What is it? I li in And how do I get there? Yeah How do I get buffed like this guy? Yeah, I'm curious what he's up to Hmm, to get buff. Where is he now I heard he grew five inches. I alardready got a tailsaw on a whole business All right, we have s good Ray Band Ma glasses take the friction out of travel. moveove through the world with your hands free and your head up. Hey Meta, where's the nearest metro station? Closest metro to you is Union Square, about three blocks away. Hey Meta, text mom. I'm getting on the train now. Sending message. checkle your itinerary, take calls, and listen to music with open ear audio. No digging for your phone, no stopping for a map just you and your glasses. Ray Ban Meta, iconic style, meets Meta AI, available at Walmart and other authorized retailers Study and play Come together on a Windows eleven PC. And for a limited time, college students get the best of both worlds. Get the unreal college deal, everything you need to study and play with select Windows eleven PCs. Eligible students get a year of Microsoft three hundred sixty five premium, and a year of Xbox GamePass Ultimate with a custom color Xbox wireless controller Learn more at windows d. com slash student offffer. Law Supplies last ends june thirtieth terms at aka. mS slash collllege PC And we're back. guess what? Uh, that's what Oh also I didn't think you would guess it. I'm sorry, also chicken butt You can't see that coming. Yeah, sorry Who is the origin of that guess what chicken but? I think this is funny becausecause it rhymes Itucin stupid. It's insane I mean, I hate children They can't do comedy. That You don't think what's up chicken butt is funny. It's not what's up Chicken butt. That is funny. Okay.'s Guess what? Chicken but. You know why I just That's not. What's up chicken but? What's up? If somebody says What's up and you say What's up Chicken butt, that's funny That's so funny. Guess what What's up No Guess what? That's funny. That's funny. What's up? Guess what Chicken butt No. Yeahah Disagree. Funny No disagree. Honestly, one of the funniest things I've ever freaking heard. All right, we got some more three views. It's time for a threereature. If you want to submit a fereature, write to us at freedom USA at gmail d. comot Yeah, justust do it Just can't like throw cost into the wind. Yeah Live out loud. tellell your family, you're off the grid for three hours do this. Does everybody have the three via questions? Hold on. Oh no, where are they Wait, we have to do something with. If you look at the link, where it says you scroll down it says new three via Then there is a link to the specific questions. There's a link that pagevvia on On the Link with all the got it All the features. Three via docs here. thoseose are. Yes. And then it'll say Laurerence questions. So we can't look at those Scott and I can't look at those questions Paul's questions. Okay. I can't. You guys can't look. Scott's questions, Laura and I can't look Is it a link in the email or it's a link in the document that you? It's a link in the document. Is it down at the bottom It's where it's included in the paragraph about three tim. page one, two, three p You you know what Go to p contontrol F. Yeah. Oh, he's doing it. There you go. Threevia There it is. That sound like a drug. I mean, you can't, okay, firstirst of all, Paul, this is a twenty eight page document. You can't just go like, oh, it's in the document I need a little moreother fucker, do you think I went down to page twenty seven in this document? How would I know what you do with your own time? Because this is not my own time. This is threeedom time. This is threeom time sucks What's cool Th tim time was different than other time. I need you guys to get along S you? No Right? You'd like to sit back there and watch right like Yeah, you're the one stirring all this shit up. You're like the joker. Okay, wait, do we need paper So I think the ink so. How did we do it before? I think people will just write down in their notes app their app. sureure. I have a whiteboard here. Okay, great. Okay. Okay. All right, shhall I kick it off? Yes. I'm opening my PDF of questions. Oh, three of V doocs here, here it is Al right, foundound it Yes. Are you ready? Iad zero info These are These are trivy questions about me from things that have been said on the show. Okay. Okay Question number one Paul's mother was the receptionist for her brother's business. What music related service did the business provide Dre we supposed to know any of his stuff? Yeah becausecause I know it You do Yeah. What music related service? Okay. Yes. All right Quion two Paul taught us all that the glade plugin in shingle plug it in, plug it in is actually based on a real song called Rub it In by Billy Crash Kradock. True or False? Nope. there's more. Craddock recorded a follow up to Rub it In called Hey All right Qion number three Paul once told a lie about his father doing an impression of a famous actor and being dead In order to get a special inscription in the actor's book and a book signing, name that actor But I feel like I knew this before it up That's entirely possible because anything each other outside of the pcket. Any I've heard on Freed of them, I will not remember Yes, because you're busy interrupting it I'm busy interrupting it Oh my A you seriously you say I don't I'm the only one who interrupts Thank you Thank you for inferring that I don't Quly corpt yourself. U this is a two point question Poolens told a story about watching a double feature with his friend Scott argue that watching One and a half unrelated movies on DVD in your home does not qualify as a double feature I don't know where one and a half comes in I watched both of these movies U either way, can you name the two movies Paul and his friend watched? You get one point for each correct answer I'm correct about that though. It's not you can't call it a double feature if you just toss on two movies at home Right Why can't you I mean you can But I think double feature is a special term reserved for going out, going out to to a place watching and watching and paying for paying for one ticket price. for something that is billed as a double feature. Yes exactly. All right U and I have no idea what these movies are. Question number five, this is the lock it in question First, I will read the question. If you think you know the answer, you can lock it in by writing it down and putting your pen or pencil or fingers down You may not change your answer once you have locked it in.. If either player does not lock in an answer, I will read a hint If you answer the question correctly before the hint, you will get two points If you answer correctly after hearing the hint, you get one point answering incorrectly Okay This has come up before I once said that I didn't think my name suited me And that it Why do we have Because this happened a before and I didn't remember last. It'll keep it'll keep happening until you remember. I need the hint. Please give the first name, the middle initial, and the last name I I got. Did you like the hint? I locked it in. You locked it in? Yeah. Okaykay. Would you like a hint Wait, so I can still guess. If you have not locked it in. I've not locked in, then you can get a hint I can only get one hint or can I get all the hints now that she's already locked it in? You only get one hint. getet one hint. Okay. Give me that hint It's the first name of a famous menace. The middle initial of a famous fox And the last name of a character in the board game I might be fucked. I can't wait to hear what you think. Okay, a famous fox. So like Vivic A that U All right. and then characters includue. you got plum, you got mustard, Scarlet colors Grape. Is that a clue color Mr. Grape Um I'm just gonna to go, okay, gotot it. I'm locked in. All right. Here we go. Question number one, what was the music related service that my uncle provided Piano tuning. Piano tuning. That's correct. Is that what you said? I And I get one. I get one. Number two, what was the Billy Crash Krodock follow up to rub it in Pull it out eat it out. rooth inc cororrect, it was you rubbed it in all wrong To whom did I lie and say my father did an impression of this famous actor in order to get a signature Adam West Peter O Too uter tools correct. Okay. Adam West, Yes. Thankk you I did work with him on a U a pilot one time Uh and animated vit for someone called Super Adventure Te I remember that Yeah. D like I do too. Dina Gould, R and Rob Cohen created it. Adam West did not do the series, but he did do the pilot and I got to hang out with him for a day and it was absolutely delightful Cool That happens. Two point questions. The double feature. What were the movies in the so called double feature that I watch. Hard days nate and help. No Can you imagine don't's not a. I've never seen them, but I guess it would be I just can't imagine Paul doing both those. Why Becauseuse you'd be like, o, look at these fucking guys I them. Okay, gremlins and jaws. No. Okay These were movies that I had not seen before And they were Coyote Ugly and battlefielder. Okay, so it's much silltier than I thought. Okay This is the lock it in question What is the name that I feel I should have? And Scott, what did you say Dennis R. Plumb I said Thomas J. Peacock The two of you somehow managed to get it. Dennis J Pacock. Yes. J's the J. What fox I have no idea. Michael J. Fox. Oh So it was an actual Fox actor. like a cartoon. So was I. That's why I guessiner. G get one point for that or no? No Okay. That's tough. Right Nither usisett it or what? Are Yeah, I think I think let me see. Are we to go What are the locket in rules again? Be Lauren locked it in first I did If you answer the question correctly before the hint, you get two points if you answer correctly after hearing hit so you answered partially correctly, you get the point. nothing. Sorry. Yeah. Okay. All right. All right. I hope you werere keeping track of the points because I was not I was. I have one. I have two points currently Okay, I'm going to do the questions next. Okay Lauren. is going to do the questions. I have two points. Paul has zero And I like it that way Mhm Lauren S one. Okay Uh Question one, when Lauren was a teenager. Okay When I was a teenager, I had three run inss with the same police officers. Are we sure this isn't the same thing we had before? don't, keep reading On our third encounter, what keepsake did the officer give me I remember this. I remember it and to have remembered it I really feel like we we may have done these before. We might But it's interesting. Were I'm still wrong every time. Yeah. I dont I feel like we haven't done years before. To me, these I think these are things we've done, but whatever. Okay. We're playing again anyway and everyone G a pancake. Who does Who does I? Who do I think is the hottest Simpsons character? So I don't remember this at all. H Hot a Simpson. When I sa actually went, what did I say So you don't even remember it. No, but I mean, I do when I saw it. Yeah Ohice Simpson character. Wow I' to think if any of them are hot Just don't think too hard Um U okay For my seventh birthday, my parents, which is really my mom and my uncle, threw me a party with what unusual and boring theme H ussual and boring theme Okay Question four, two point question I once surprised my grandma on her birthday with a box of chocolate covered strawberries, which she did not appreciate because they were too big and there were six of them. According to the story, there are two gifts that my grandma always loves receiving. Name them. You get one point answer and R rest in peace my granda. M Um U Okay And the lock it in question lock it in question. First I will read the question. If you think you know the answer you can lock it in by writing it down and putting your pen or pencil down. You may not change your answer once you have locked it in If either player does not look at an answer, I will read a hint If you answer the question correctly before the hint, you get two points. If you answer correctly after hearing the hint, you get one point. Here's my question. You said if neither locks it in, you'll read the hint Now, she had locked it. I I think it's okay if one person locked for them answer inc correctly get nothing. Here's the question I was once offered opium by a guy with what clothing related nickname Oh okay U I'm locked in I need the hint The hint is it's probably where he kept his opium Okay All right, ready? All right, Ready Question one Did the police officer give me the third time I had an encounter with him? A trading trading card who's the hottest Simpsons character Ao the I guess auto as well. It's part. It's part. That was like, it can't be part. But I was a child when I watched that show. A But now you're an adult. Yeah. You child For my seventh birthday, my mom and my uncle threw me a party with what unusual and boring theme? your uncle My uncle was my gay uncle. Tax filing manners Eetiquette It was an ent party. Were you walking around with like books on your head? Yes, we were. and everyone was dressed in a nice dress. That's so funny Two point question. what does my grandma? What do my grandma always love receiving? There are two two gifts We get one point for each correct answer I said money and teeth I said flowers and candy. No, a hundred dollars cash or a Walgreens's gift card. But yes, money counts. sooney at one point So money in a Walgreens' gift card are the two answers? Obious she doesn't want candy if the chocolate covered strawberries were too big. There were six of them. Yeah. I thought it was the amount. Like if you give candy, like M and M, she'd be like, oh, wow, there's a hundred of these It didn't work that way. Okay, and then the guy who offered me opium, what was his clothing related nickname? Scot Gorts Pockets My friends call me pockets because I don't have any. I believe it was the thing he said to me. Right.. Didn't this come up recently Probably. All right. Okay. so I have three total I so far have one, and then we're gonna do. You locked it in though, Paul. So you get two for that that last answer is Oh yeah, Yeah. So how many do you have, Paul I think I know you have three three. Yeah have three. Okay, so we're tied to three. Lauren has one. Yeah So Paul, you need to get an answer correct otherwise All hell will break loose. We will be tied unless Lauren gets more than two. Okay You guys ready? Yeah All right. Question one Scott once made out with a woman. at a Halloween party and got makeup from his costume all over her face. What or whom was Scott dressed as What was Scott dressed as can't be right but it's funn Okay, question two In high school, Scott pretended to be interested in joining the Army in order to get what from an Army recruiter Question three, When he was a kid, Scott had to get stitches in his face after attempting what dangerous stunt? mean Two point question Scott once boasted that his address was so secret, almost nobody knew it He What? Name the two very cool, not at all evil organizations that did know it, i. e, they sent mail to his address with his name on it. Oh yeah, you got one point for each you name correctly Could you read that last party book again? Name the two Cool, not at all evil organizations that did know the address, i e they sent mail to his address with his actual name on instead of the alias asm. I think it's well, I don't want to say All right, Paul, are you Is there a fifth question?? Of course, off course, dear. Okay, Some of you are wrapping it up. Okay, let's wrap it up guys The locket in question Scott's former roommate This is incorrect, so I won't read this part of it. But Scott's former roommate who his roommates with the eye of partarty's guy had what food related nickname I'm locked in. You're locked in All right, Laurn, do you want the hint Yeah. This round food is often associated with New York City. I mean, that just gives it away. Yeah, this actually' gonna gasp. Okay. All right, here we go, ready Question one, Scott once made out with a woman at a Halloween party, got makeup from his costume all over her face. Whom or what was Scott dressed as I said anywise said the Joker Incorrect Ace freely from kiss. I would imag R right? Yes. Okay In high school, Scott pretended to be interested in joining the Army in order to get what from an Army recruiter? I said a sticker A gift card A hand job What? No, eight free lunches. Free lunches. Eight free lunches.es.reeun He took me out He took me out because he would go like, let's go to lunch and talk about your future. And I kept string him along. Wow. Eight times until finally I not sure. On the eighth time he was like what are we doing here? I was like, yeah, I'm notating I guess. Eh time. Yeah. Yeah That's a lot. The army was short one person. Yeah. That's so desperate. Really gott to close this deal Okay, questQion three, when he was a kid, Scott had to get stitches in his face after attempting what dangerous stunt? Riding a bike with his eyes closed. While? Wearing sunglasses? Yes Snglasses doesn't matter.