Charity Mistakes and Final Reflections

A fax came through on the fax machine and it said Blue Peter's bonnie is dead and she thought it was a misprint. and it was Blue Peter's cornie is dead. Which is very apt for this Anyway, Connie, I was alive. And she was all fine. Yeahah, and she probably read further and saw that it was a dog. Oh gosh. Greetings, Deathlings, I'm Mel Ged Richch, and this is the podcast where famous humans gather to plan the one event they definitely won't be attending. their own ruddy funeral Welcome to It's way Cll up a few my little darlings because today's guest is a woman who's been beaming into our living rooms for simply decades Blue Peter Badge dispensing leegend to childildren's author, screenwriter, and all round creative Powerhouse She's interviewed everybody from pop stars to prime ministers, she's written stories that have ignited young imaginations. And she once cycled across the UK, dressed as Of course she did. It's the incredible Do you like to hear the BP theme tunin Connie? Does it bring back good stuff? You know what? This is weird ' this was gonna be one of my admissions. You know for later on in the project. Do want to hold it? hold the gold? Shall holdold the gold. And also that's like a cliffhanger. But anyone listening, they can be like, o, what's that? What's that? I must keep going till the end. Keep in the tin. Hold the gold, keepep in the tin C coming up. A or sleep. So two different extremes. I love that.ve to be honest, I've often thought Asteroid would be asteroid if we're taking everyone with us. Sleep if it's just us and they need to know that we were happy to do that. Don't mourn us Life goes on, No one's exempt, you'll die as well The biggest tournament in soccer is finally here and I've already started planning my watch parties. My go to move before kickoff is stopping at Total wine and more to grab drinks for the whole crew. wine, beer, seelters, maybe a few ready to drink options, everything we need for a full day of matches. With this many games, it definitely helps knowing you're getting the lowest prices Total wine makes it so easy because I can grab everything I need in one stop. Get match day ready with tootal wine and more today. So you're set from kickoff to the final whistle. Spirits are not sold in Virginia and North Carolina. Drink responsibly must be twenty one Mornings have a rhythm You can hear it Feel it Quaker We fuel it with one hundred percent whole gy notes and a good source of fiber in every bowl. helpelping you turn that rhythm into your soundtrack for a great day Fuel to start whatever's next Quaker, official sponsor of FVA World Cup twenty six. Right. This is what I want to lay before you Have you done enough good things in your life to get through the gates? If so, what?? I've done. things in my life to get through the gates on like the public perception of what should get you through the gates. Yeah. Being on BP for Petes sake, you did loads of good things. Yeah. sorry to bring it to BP, but I love That's okay.P. No, no, no, I do too. Yeah. Hence I was on it. so we could totally Yeah, like all those appeals that we did, the appeal filming And then even beyond like things like comic relief and ye thing, all of that stuff.. So you feel like I've ticked the boxes. I feel like I've ticked the boxes that were perceived to tick to get in I sense a big butt. No, but I just think all of us human beings A shit. Yeah, we are. We really are. We're fucking shit. What Why are we so bad? We're sort of It's not our fault. It's not our fault. It's the whole society. It's what we're born into. I think we're selfish buggers. We're selfish buggers because that's the status quo now. Isn't it? Yeah And we don't mean to. Like we would rather like, I don't know, buy a new topper or redo a fitted kitchen just for cosmetics that doesn't need redoing Th save lives, for instance. That sounds so wororthy, doesn't it? But's true It's true, isn't? We're just like, Ohh well, my top looks nicer, so I'm glad that fifty quid was spent on me rather than planting trees. Oh my gosh, that's so worthy. No, it's good. That's why everyveryone's going to hell. Are you gonna go into? No, we're not really. I didn't mean that. I don't wan to make this into a downer. No, you're never a downer wow. Oh my gosh, I love you. No, You could never possibly be a downer Hell has its plus sides. I mean we we no Fury, which no fury. What are the plus sides? I'm interested It think people sit in the chair saying they'd rather go to hell than heaven because hellven seems boring. Do they say that? Yeah, and hell would be where the kind of The Lolses, the interesting people, the nasty people, but also the drama. Well I like a lot of them. crime docs I watch serial killer things and they'll all be in hell, won't they? Well you'll be able to I'll be able them face to face. Yeah. But then, you know, I don't want to glamorize them like o those serial killers. But it's all in the childhood isn't it? And often these true crime docs, I watch them and I'm like, o, they've done that but they don't tell me about the childhood and that's why I want to know about Be that's what shapes them. You want to know why the whyise and wef? I just want to know like what was your upbringing? What happened between n and seeven? thenen what happened next? blah blah, blah blah blah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah. No, that's a good reason. Listen, I'm not saying you're going to go to hell. We'll see what happens throughout the course of the pod. Thank you very much. Now, food. I mean, I am a sucker for chocolates and I scream I love ice cream and chocolate and I can't stop loving ice cream and chocolate H has to be the right chocolate. Can we drill down here? Yeah. Am I talking dark chocolate? I love dark chocolate. I do love darkolate Do you like dark chocolate? I like milk chocolate. I like dark chocolate. I don't like it if the milk chocolate is too sweet or too plasticky or too synthetic tasty. Yeah. I love dark chocolate, even if it's really dark like I just love But I don't like things to be so sickly sweet that then I need a bit of dilution, if that makes sense. So if it's like, I don't know, some full on chocolate dessert, I might need a bit of vanilla ice cream on the side just to dilute it up a bit. Yeah. Deaf a bit. Yeah. Have you ever made chol shade? L shade, ye. Have you ever made chocolate I on pa. Oh God me back. So I went to Belgium And did like to shock let tears. it's one of those lovely sh Oh yeah, that's just so the dream for me, I just love Do you remember how it was made? I'd love to go to one of those Belgium? Let's go. I'd love to. Shall we do Let's come do Do you your podcast? I no, it's too. Let's make a new podcast about chocolate. Should we do that? And then we'll go to Belgium? Yes, please. Belgium yeah, chocolate. So let's drill down a little bit. Okay, arere we gonna to have like Some chocolate with a nut ice cream, for a pistachio or whatever. Oh yeah. A you gonna go for all those things? I can go for all sorts of mixtures and different sorts of ways of having the chocolate. You know when you get like a trio of desserts, a fancy thing and you're like, I like that because I get three different methods Yeah. We could just go infinitely different So like a moose with a Volutee o and a stick Yeah, like exactly like that And there's a ice cre. condante with some shavings and a bit end cake Like, you know, just different and then a bomb. so we get the ice cream in. like just loads and loads. Hang on. the bomb is the is it sponge on the outer, then ice cream on the inner? That's a bomb. Like I think as long as it's in that thing with the layers in that thing, sorry, those that can see No that I'm doing aal shapes. Yes. Yes. that's what I'm doing with my hands, everyone is only hearing. withith the layers and they can be whatever. So you could even go chocolate layer, you could put sponge then and then do vanilla innards And the innards it sound horrible. The innards are liquid, right? in a bomb or not know they're frozen. It doesn't need to be liquid. Oh, it sounds absolutely delicious. What's the most delicious chocolate You've eaten Growing up in Eeling, Leonidas, you know that chocolate? Yes. So Belgian. Yeah, Belgian. So from a young age, because that's been around for a long time there in Eeling. was my go to my favorite because I hadn't really sampled other ye, you know Godiver or whatever nowhouse or whatever. but I do like chocolate of that ilk very much right Oh yeah, love Polly Carlen Oh yeah, no, I know it's so good. I just love well not you know, I also like dairy milk cout, for instance, contentious, but I do like nuts with my chocolate. Again, that's dilution. Yes. So can I steer you towards a preteminger? M Almond covered in dark. Oh, don't worry. I this morning. In the little pink morning in the pink packets. Yes, I love those. They're so good But I have to say, you know taste is texture as well. Yeah. So you know, often like a big slab of just chocolate isn't as satisfying as I don't know chocolate buttons or a flake or you know, because it leaves you wanting more mmaker the other day, a coffeeos. ee a coffee match. Really? I like the orange match m. Oh, do you. What about a dark Terry's chocolate orange I tried the dark. Yeah. I love I like You you knowre not so. I do not like fruit with my chocolate apart from orange. And sometimes, you know, you get given some and this is going to sound ungrateful, but some people are into giving these is fancy chol. yes. And I don't B pure or inf vioolt like mali hor. Yeah. this ponscy chocolates, no man, do not tarnish, do not contaminate. No. I would rather just have the same amount of chocolate or the same price amount because they could be like flipping a fancy box of chocolates now a lot of money. J buy me that inf flipping Galaxy or Derryent or whatever. Yes, you're with me on this, aren't you? Yeah Later in the show And when a pet dies on Blue Peter, did you as presenters have to Was there if no, we didn't do that. But we did talk about items. Yeah. so items like that are good in a way because you want children to be accustomed or to, you know, like you were saying Death is sad, but there you know, it happens to everyone. Every living thing on bloody planet Earth has gota die. Exact. the nature of our being. Miss Charlie, I've been thinking, right When I joined this podcast, it was already, obviously a glorious chaotic death soaked machine. But you, you guys had to put together the bones of the show as to with all the what ifs. Oh Mal, the what ifs can almost bury you. And yet you made the leap and thank the spectral gods you did because it turned out to be one of the best decisions of your own dead little lives, am I right? Yep, but I'll tell you what, everything feels better when you're part of a team people around you who know what they're doing. And that team feeling can be achieved at Shopify. Yes, Shopify. The commerce platform behind millions of businesses from giants like Deathwish Coffee and Gym Shark People kind of just starting out with a dream and a dodgy microphone. And imagine having hundreds of ready to use templates to build a beautiful online shop. Plus the AI tools. Shopify can write product descriptions, page headlines, even enhance your product photos. And o baby the marketing. Shopify helps you get the word out with email campaigns and social posts all in one place No more, whichich tab is the one making the noise? And if you get stuck, their award winning, award winning twenty forty seven support is always there. So Dehlings, it's time to turn those what ifs into With Shopify today. Sign up for your one pound per month trial at shhopify d. co d. uk slash wake. Go to shhopify d. co d. uk slash wake. That's shhopify. co. uk slash wake Chice Charlie, I've just popped back from what feels like an eternity of admin. Classic. What's on the to do list? Oh, mounting a celestial bookshelf, sorting my earthly storage unit and emotionally processing a flat pack Melt, it sounds like you need Task raabbbit. Task rabbit Is that a celestial creature? Even better. It's an app that connects you with skilled local taskers who can help with everything from furniture assembly and home repairs to moving and garden jobs. So someone else can bravely face the Allen Ky. Exactly. You choose your tasker based on their rates, availability, skills and reviews, so you know who's coming and what they can do Well, listeners, get ahead of your to do list. Get ahead of your to do list with ten pounds off your first task at taskrabbit. co. Uk or on the Taskrabbit app using promo code WTaW. 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L I don't want Or maybe they wouldn't be like my family to be really sad. Yeah. so they'll be really happy. I was like, maybe if I' just die because like an asteroid hits the earth, then we're all gone But then I kind of think that'll be the nicest way to go. But then the kiddies, I feel bad for the kids because I kind of feel well I've had my time. Yes. Maybe it's they're n the wise're the wiseer. They're n thewise. but maybe it's quite a sort of choosy asteroid and it just goes for the over No because then they'll all still be sad, won't they that Mum's gone? Or maybe they won't. Maybe they realize Mum wanted to go like this. in which case let's all just die in our sleep Forget the asteroid. Well, everyone. Well, no just, I mean, that's quite like, I mean, the asteroid was gonna Yeahah, but yeah, not in one fell swoop. I just mean as we would die. Yeah. if. Yeah, yeah yeah. Yeah. so asteroid potentially, but aoid or sleep. So two different extremes. I've to be honest, I've often thought Asterid would be Asteroid if we're taking everyone with us. Sleep if it's just us and they need to know that we were happy to do that. Don't mourn us Life goes on. No one's exempt, you'll die as well Now Good. We're going to bring the deeathlings in now. s So Nadia from Bolton has emailed it, nice. and she says Hey team, my youngest has just started primary school. Okay, which has unlocked a wave of childhood memories, including this one my mum now delights in retelling to my kids as a warning. Okay When I was twelve, I despised mornings, still do. One day was particularly bad, probably because I'd been up all night hogging the family computer. Remember those days? The family computer. I'm too old for the family computer. I never had a family computer. We got one during my sort of early teens. Amstrad No, it was called the Texas inststruments and I really wanted us to get a Commodore sixty four But we got a Texas instrument and they became like obsolete within a few years And I was like, I wish we'd got the Commodore sixty four. You could get a Commodore sixty four now, couldn't you? I could now. But now don't I'm very analogue. My husband's digital. Now I'm just quite happy with just my phone and like handing me down laptops from other members of the family. An We can't do this without going off on a tangent. So barely conscious, I shuffled into the bathroom, locked the door, and had what I still consider a stroke of genius Tentter hooks, Do you want to take another break? Well we're on another tint hooks? And I turn the shower on Every towel hanging, I don't know where this is going. What? I have no idea. I took every towel hanging on the door. Yeah, laid them neatly on the floor Lay down, used my own towel as a blanket and went straight back to sleep I don't know how long I was out for, but I won't. to my mum unlocking the door, bursting in ready to scream at me for taking too long in the shower She did not expect to find her daughter fast asleep on the floor while the shower ran at full blast. Let's hope my kids don't inherit my imagination or my impact on the water hill Nadia, I mean, is this something that you're still doing? Do you still like to sleep in towels? I have to say If there's a heat wave, which we're now a bit more accustomed to Oh Yeahah climate change and all that, putut your towel Damp. Oh yeah, into a freezer Pull it out before we go to bed, lie on it Beautiful That is a really good night's sleep right there. And I would just sometimes put water down my arms and legs. Dab it. Ice cube back of the neck. That works wonders comoming up, my deeathlings. It's so cringe. 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I do Well, maybe they'll just do that for the funeral then. It would just be me on my own in a coffin. but it's the other people that it's the people if they want to, they're welcome to come. Yeah. they can come. It's up to them, no pressure. I won't be put out if you don't make it and I won't be put out if you great crash and I won't be put out if you Whatever BP, did you ever have any funeral No, it's not Yeah. Well, no, we didn't have funerals, but there were pets that died. Oh, the bllue Peter pets. Which ones did you see go? Which ones went when you hy was on it ten years. So how long have you got? How many pets did you see go? I mean, honey? No Was Hannoney still on? No. No, so we had Bonnie. whichich is this is interesting on the subject of death. Bonnie died and they sent out a fax to like, you know a press release to say because in those days it was a big big thing if a ber pet died. ye. And my friend who was working at EMap at the time, which made like Smash hits, Sky magazine, like all these good days magazines, FHM whatever. Yes. A fax came through on the fax machine and it said Blue Peter's bonnie is dead and she thought it was a misprint And it was Blue Peter's corner instead. Which is very apt Oh this Anyway Connie was alive. And did she was all fine? yeah, and she probably read further and saw that it was a dog. Oh whichich I like to think I'm not anyway, so that's bad humor. And so yeah, there you go. And when a pet died on Blue Peter, did you as presenters have to Was there if no, we didn't do that. But we talk about items. Yeah. so items like that are good in a way because you want children to be accustomed or to, you know, like you were saying Death is sad, but there you know, happens to everyone. Every living thing on bloody planet Earth is gott to die. Exactly. the nature of our being I mean, I've got to come clean and say my BP pets are Jason T. Sep. Oh yeah. intont Simon Groom's George' Saus. Simon Groom's pets were Who came after Shb? Oh Goldet G Goldie. Yeah, Goldie was Bonnie's mum. That's right. Bonnie Oh Bonnie was Goldie's daughter. Yeah. ye yourour son. No daughter. Daughter. Bonnie. And they all get buried underneath the Italian Sanken garden. I mean, no, but that is the roomor and we like to keep that because Petra's statue was there. So that's why had a bloody statue for Petra. Yeah. So that's why I think people think of it as like a gravestone or something. Yes Well Who's getting what Charity is just getting n Chity. Chity needs it. Yeah, whichich one? or which ones? So I just gave a load of money. Palestine right? Yeah. It was like a big amount of money and I paid it from the wrong account And then I paid I thought hadn't gone through. Oh no, that's it. I thought it hadn't gone through because there's something to do with my online banking. So it's a huge amount. I've paid it from The wrong account number one So that's like, don't give away your account number. No's number one. But it's a cut along storyour. And I paid it twice then as well And one is money that isn't for that. I had to ring the charity and ask for it I proved to them, I've actually paid more now from a different account. But it was so embarrassing. Oh God. It was so embarrassing. they actually had to like reimburust. And I was like, this is a tragedy. sureurely I should let you keep it. But this isn't even my own solo account. just because it's too easy now. I was told rest. people pay,'s no which is true, there's no restriction on how much you can pay. Whereas if I'm paying from my online banking You're only allowed to pay up to X and X. And you go through a few little things. You have to do it to' like, oh, Ill just do it off Apple pay. So that's how the mistake was made. that Ghes feeds into what I' saying everything we're so indulge. everythingthing's so easy. There's no hardship And that means that you can do stupid things like I did. I'm just saying this to make myself feel better I did such a stupid thing. and again, I've gone off on a tangent. No, it's tangents is what we love. Sorry hear this. Rin it in, a friend of mine was That a charity auction Le here Pie eyide. ye, real pie eyed And she woke up the next morning of some big old, you know, to do. Yeah, it was probably back in the nineties actually Yeah. the nauy nineties And she woke up and she had a very odd realization. She didn't know what it was, and then it slowly came to her She had bought a Harley Davidson motorbike Oh my goodness. fromr the auction. Probably signed by somebody