Reflecting on Growth and Perfection

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And yeah, I'm drinking sort of a red sauce out of a glass bottle and it makes me feel a little bit fancy but also a little bit fruitful. I'm joined of course by Ashley Lawless Many of you know Ashley Lawless because she's my producer . In addition to being an amazing cinematographer and director on her own right, Ashley has been my full time producer for what at this point like you almost two years. Two years. Almost two years. Almost two. And the Platinum show people ob,viously know you well and good 'cause you're always up and there. But this is your freaking main show debut. What is up, guys? Yeah, the patrons are kind of my rider guys. They kind of know me, but otherwise I feel like I've been kind of Voldemort positive in the ways that people have heard of me. Yeah, they utter your name. Yeah , but it's shameful. Ashley Ash that be. It's a secret name that only the real ones. The real ones. Well, actually, what is what makes you perfect today to be on the show to answer people's freaking problems? Okay, so I've been thinking about this a lot. Yeah, like all week. Like time. I have a song that I listen to every time I get nervous and I will listen to it over and over until I'm not nervous anymore in a way that is kind of like a beta blocker for me. What is the song I have to ask? Barracuda by Heart? Could you sing a couple bars? Bumper, bumper, bumper, bumper, bumper, bum per, bum . Oh my god. Barracuda . Yeah So when you're getting nervous, is that like you're at home and you're feeling like you're getting anxiety and you listen to Barracuda ? It's like like, well before job interviews , I'll like in the past I've been like, fuck, I'm nervous, like how do I how do I like remember my life? Over and over. There was one point where I had interviewed for a job years ago and I listened to it twenty three times before my interview. That's so funny. Absolutely insane. And it's because when I go home with my hometown friends, we play rock band. Yeah, and we one hundred percent Barracuda. Of course , it's it's a classic rock band song. Yeah, we will do it over and over until we get it. And I think that repetition is why. Songs to me to motivate. I will do that sometimes where I'll listen to like not necessarily songs with lyrics, but I'll think of like okay, , I want to feel like this. I'll listen to like video game soundtracks or soundtracks. To put in the zone, it means social network soundtracks. I obviously want to listen to a lot because I like it. When you need to get wired in, when I need to get l knownit,erally when I'm like, I have to log in and do and grind business. I grind business and numbers to do stuff and papers. When I'm doing papers and I'm doing numbers and I'm starting my tech giant company. And I'm doing documents and I'm following up and I'm in water and I'm cutting my best friends out of the company and I'm doing it. And I'm dropping my day ones, dropping my day ones, and I'm making sure that I can fly as fast as I can fly like Icris . So I listen to the social network for that. Right. You need like a sick ass beat. Yeah, I need a sick ass beat. Would that be the soundtrack to your life? Holy shit, probably. If I was probably gonna name one? No, I think soundtrack to my life, I listen to a lot of jazzy like generic playlists in my house. But I don't think that's soundtrack to my life. This is a soundtrack to my life. I don't know, yeah, what would the soundtrack to your life be? If it would be barracuda by heart ? No, no, maybe that's like my walkout if I was a wrestler. Yeah. But I think if it was a soundtrack, I'd want something that has variety. It may be Minecraft 'cause it kinda gives you a variety. It kind of gives you it all. Or see I'm a big undertail is my favorite video game . Maybe it'd be undertale because it has a variety. And also I lock the fuck in to another medium . Sorry. Sorry. By the way, MiniGraft does have the fucking best music. Undertale, I am less familiar with music, but I did play. Yeah. And I liked it. Yeah. I will say for me, it might be Zara Larsons Crushed . For whatever reason recently we've been driving back from shooting graveyard ships, yes, we will be sort of put on Zara Larson as an upper. We're doing Midnight Sun Acoustic Live from the I Heart Radio Studio. By the way, I texted you the other day and was like, I got a push notification that Zara Larson had a new track. You got an email? No email . It was like, dude, big dude. You said holy shit. And it was a remix, too. It was like, don't email me about this. This is like basically a formality. They knew, they knew. They were like, God, who do we tell? They knew I was gonna be so into it . But actually, we've got to calibrate our advice for Tim before we get to the college, it's time for the freaking speed r . Okay, I'm getting ready. I'm getting in the zone. You're gonna need to lock in. You're gonna need to make sure that we're on the same page so we can get in there and we can get it done advice style . Okay , perfect person speed round starts now . Perfect physical activity . I started Irish dancing, so I'm gonna say that. That's true. You compete it at worlds? Yeah, I did and I'm getting back into it. And so I' Im think going to do regionals this year. That is so fucking good. Okay, perfect book. Oh fuck Well, I just read Product Till Mary, which is really awesome, but also Pride and Prejudice is my favorite all time. I haven't read Pride and Prejudge, obviously. Obviously PH i. Hammer. I thought there was a J in there, PJ HM but that's actually just the end of project. Perfect cocktail order. I'm gonna go with the Midori S . Really? Yeah. Now a Midori Sai feel like is green? It's green as fuck. It looks kind of like it's radioactive. Yeah But it's radioactive It's melon Discurrent. It's like melon? Shaken up crazy. Shaken my melons. Shaken my melons at the bar. Shaken my melons for a medori sour . How about that? How about that? A perfect movie to re.w Okayatch, it depends on the v ibe. Monsters Inc. general. If I'm missing my mom, breakfast club, if it's an obligation to myself, when Harry Mets Alli? Obligation to yourself? Yeah, it's a yearly rewatch for me. Oh, you gotta watch it. No, it's like, I got to do it. For me, it's like if I'm looking for like that movie feeling, often it's Ocean's Levin loving that or it's like Social Network is another one that I put on all the time. Yeah. Or like, to be honest, Toadrow or Spirited Away. Those are great too. Those are great for like a rainy day. Yeah, they always give me the sauce that I'm looking for. Yeah. Perfect vacation spot. What if I said beach and mountain together in one? And the beach is the lake . I'm going to say North Conway in New Hampshire and everybody in New England is going to be like, are you dead ass ? But I am so deadass. It's like you get the you get the tubing in the lakes in the summer and the skiing in the winter Oh my god. I'm loving I mean, I love a tube. I love a we there's a lot of lake vacationing in North Carolina . I was always up in a lake tubing, doing getting on a jet ski, falling off of it ,, it o'hs going away, swimming after it. Oh, have you ever gotten thrown off of a tube in a way that's visceral? I got thrown off a tube. I was like, I think I'm dead. Like when you're fucking his neck hits the water, holy shit. My dad used to do this thing going up where he would sw erve for the boat we were and then drive straight through. I'm airborne. No, literally a tube is maybe like by the way, tubing is crazy dangerous. Some of the stuff we're doing as kids, I'm like, I wouldn't put Julian on a fucking tube like that. I'm doing tricks on the tube in the air. I'm literally like I remember being like getting airborne slamming into the ground and they're like that they're like I'm then you skymember skipping on the water. Oh , there was at one point where I was handstanding on top of the tube and I had a friend with me. We're both laughing. There's also a thing about tubing where you can't stop laughing when you're laughing. Oh, it's so it's exhilarating, but we both were handstanding because we were going to fly off this tube and we landed on top of one another. Oh my god, by the way, broken nose, broken face. Broken everything. I like how both slam turned Jesus . Tubing is like , I mean shout out to everyone in the comments who's getting seriously injured by tubing because it is so dangerous. And I was so fun. Like as a kid, there's nothing more fun to being like go as fast as you fucking can. Yes. And hold on forward to your life. I remember my friend almost flipped his boat. He like he was driving the boat. We're probably yeah, we're probably we should not have been doing this. We were like seventeen sixteen, seventeen and he's like, I can take the boat out and we can go tubing. And he was basically like I remember we're tubing right, he's going in a circle. So we're like whipping. And then I see the boat is going so fast and in a circle that the boat skips . You know what I mean? Where it's like he's going it's like skipping like a rocket skipping like a rug and it was like everybody's gonna be dead. This is you can't just stop and you're out on the tube . I was in the tube and I was like okay stop stop please go back to the beach house . Like it was like not funny. Holy it's funny because I am picturing you on the tube kind of not being able to do anything and you have a life jacket. I'm life jacketing on. I'm like holding it with one leg like it's Project Tail Mary Style. I'm like fucking on the ship about to go into orbit and he's creating G force on the lake. It was fucked up. Like a tube I honestly I do miss it now that I'm saying it, but will I let my son in a tube? Never. Way too dangerous. Perfect time to wake up. During the weekday, I love a seven hundred and forty five on the weekend, it's eleven for is that exclusively if you've been out or something before up late? No, it's kind of like I let the week catch up to me because I am a morning person and a night person . And so I don't get a lot of sleep during the week and then on a Saturday, I crash it. Yeah, I mean, yesterday, I 'cause we've been shooting graveyard shift and it's like we're up so fucking late and I am not getting better at it. It's hard every time. No, I think it's also fucking up my circadian rhythm in a way that's unbelievable . I think my eye has been twitching because we've been turning . My eye has been twitching and there are sometimes where I will like just be sitting on the couch and I go truly. Like where am I? Because it's just so like the disorientation of doing that. I felt this way after twenty four hours stream. I don't think my sleep was okay for like weeks after that. It was so hard weird on my body. Right. Perfect final snack of the night. I'm gonna say it's gonna be either some cheese of sort . What type? I like to spread it on a cracker so and it's usually one cracker or a string cheese. And what are you putting string cheese on a cracker? No, no, no, it's either or it's either like a spreadable. Yeah. Like I have, I think I have like a garlic cheese dip. Cheese. Yeah. It's called cheese spreads, but it's probably not actually cheese. It's like some sort of cheese product. It's cheese product . Cream. It's a cream. And I'm slathering that on Rits, what are we talking there? Are we thin? It's a Trader Joe of sort . No, you know what it is? It's not. I was gonna say it was the Trader Joe Brioche and I'm lying. It's the butterfly cookie cracker. I've seen those. Yeah, and they're kind of awesome. And I don't know, they have little speckles in 'em . And I just think that makes it a little bit more delicious. I agree with that, by the way. And I have been recently really on my cheese. I've been able to get on your cheese like way too much. Even on your cream. I mean, that doesn't fucking change. No, well, I am learning that you're kind of cream throughout the day 'cause I thought it was cream at night, but you're having yogurt up top, cheese in the middle. Don't out me . I told you by the way, yeah, I said the other day I was like, yeah, I have yogurt through the day. Is that like and I was like, are you impressed by that? No, that's like yogurt sort of almost. Hey, I had yogurt in the morning. I actually fucking yogurt in the morning. And you were like, yeah, that makes complete sense. Yeah. I didn't go really . 're not supposed to . I thought it was impressive I was. having yogurt. But yeah, I'm trying to now, I'm actually trying to I'm in . I was still excited 'cause I was like, I like weighed myself and I had lost a little bit and I'm like, okay, I got to be on bulk mode. ta I got get put on LBs. You're gonna bulk. So I'm just like, which is so stupid because I already fucking whatever I want. So I'm just like, I'm gonna have another cup of ice cream It's an excuse to be like, yeah, God, I guess I have have an to I'm bulking. I have to have three. I'm bulking. I need to have like extra yogurt, extra fucking raviolis at lunch. Lather the caramel on the cream at the end of the night. Which is all sugar doing nothing for my weight, but everything's like the bad things b.ody My's rotting effectively. I've been trying to fix my diet in a way that I just eat chicken and rice or beef and rice. Yeah, chicken and rice, beef and rice is really cool. And it's tough. It's tough. don't I fail. And it's an unfair thing I'm putting my son through because I'm really eating whatever I want. And I'm like, Member broccoli we got to broccoli broccoli. And then you're like housing cinnamon toast crunch after broccoli . Yeah, certainly. Yeah, I got Captain Crunch and him noticed it immediately. And I got it as a secret little daddy treat because he's not having Captain Crunch. He did end up having a bowl for like desserting, but he was like, he was like, what's that? Like he noticed immediately 'cause the box vibrating where the cabinet . Finally, perfect candle smell. Oh my God. Bath and Bodyworks has this little thing called Buckloft and it smells . It smells like books. Is it to give you the thing we have to share your pants, like when you walk in a bookstore Well, you're talking to me now . I don't think I want to shake handle . It's the thing I know what you mean. It's like the door fins or whatever the books give off. There's a name for the feeling . Yeah, it immediately hits you right in the hole. The jeans . It hits you in the jeans when you walk into a B and N. No, it just kind of smells like goodness . Bloody descriptor . It smells sweet with a little bit of cologne, maybe. But it's not like a deep cologne, it's like a light airy. I want to start wearing more cologne more on reg aular basis. I feel like every time I wear it, I feel fancy . Oh , I yeah, I recently have a signature set. If you've decided on one? I decided on one, and every time I walk into a room, people are like , you smell delicious. I bought multiple. My neighbor has stopped in her tracks passing me in the pavement. Really? Yeah. To tell you you smell good? That's pretty cool. That's a good feeling. That feeling one. That feeling one, my neighbor tells me I smell good. Yeah. Well, Ash,le youy successfully passed the speed round Let's go . And we have got to get to the freaking calls. But before we do, if you like the show, then consider rating and subscribing on every single platform so you don't miss an episode. And also if you love this show and you want more of it and you simply cannot get enough, well now you can by joining the Patreon getting the ad free extended version of every single episode, including this one where we talked about Ashley's lore. I lore drop. Ashley had a wool buck. Yeah, it's just a taste. And then also bonus episodes of every single Friday where we call back people on the show and we get their updates to how my advice changed their lives as well as doing twist on the format, et cetera. The callbacks from last week were Lakes my cupcak es Ball. Yeah, yes. Stunning update from the two hundred episode. Yeah, we also get an update from the Anakon I hacked my workplace The hackathon. And then we got the one from the Gareth Reynolds episode of how my partner doesn't know that I had a threesome with my bestie and her boyfriend. Yes, yeah. So we've got those updates on there as well as dozens and dozens of others. And also Ashley's feature on the Platinum Show, plenty of plenty. So get over there for our vibe is slash antics. Our vibe slash awesome cool hangout space . It's actually our awesome cool hangout space. It's actually our coolest space. It's our cool space that we hang out on the internet. Hang out and you can see Ashley's cool producer desk. Yeah, you can see my desk and some of the cool fits that I throw. That's right. Actually is throwing fits in the platy. So get it over there for all that and more but until then it is time to take some calls There are so many different ways to advocate for your own mental health, whether that's through meditation, whether that's through talking to somebody, or whether that's through psychiatry. And I have so many friends that struggle to find a reliable psychiatrist and that is where talk iatry comes in. Talkiatry is a one hundred percent online psychiatry practice that provides comprehensive evaluations, diagnoses and ongoing medication management for conditions like ADHD, anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, OC PSD, insomnia, and more. If you've ever tried to find psychiatrist who takes your insurance and been told to wait months for an appointment or that they're just not accepting patients, you are not alone. Unlike therapy only platforms, psychiatry is psychiatry. You're seeing a medical provider who can diagn ose mental health conditions and prescribe medications when it's appropriate. Getting started takes just a few minutes, complete a short online assessment, get matched with clinicians who fit your needs, and schedule your first visit in days, not months. If you're looking for a psychiatrist, please check them out. Head to talki . com slash perfect person to complete the short assessment and get matched in in that work psychiatrist in just a few minutes. That's talkiatry dot com slash perfect person to get matched in minutes. If you love to remodel your freaking house with the furniture up in it, well then you're gonna love Cozy because Cozy is a modular furniture brand that makes everything easy from shopping to assembly, cleaning and reconfiguring your space. You may be thinking, What even is modular furniture? I don't even know what that is. Well, modular furniture means you can fully customize your living space and rearrange it whenever you feel. Your space , your call. Change the sectional into two separate surface, change your cover colors, rearrange the whole freaking room, cozy. Makes it all possible. Yeah, and the best part, removable and washable covers actually , because I'm spilling coffee absolutely all over myself. Okay, I'm walking into the living room with a little cup of joe filled to the brim and it's exploding all over me in my couch I can't freakin wash it. Well guess what ? With Gozi? Now I can. 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You can freakin' turn two separate sofas into one big sofa. And the best part, removable and washable covers, babe. Yeah. I'm spilling coffee all over my blouse and all over the furniture . And luckily with Cozy, I can just take it off the furniture. My blouse is another story though. If you spill something, these are stain resistant covers that you can just freak and wash. And it isn't stuff with Sofa's Cozy offers rug, side tables, coffee tables, dining tables, dining, chairs, shells, outdoor furniture and their brand new bed frame. If you can believe that, stylish and modular and delightful. Transform your living space today with cozy. That's cozy dot com cos ey dot com The home of possibilities? Made easy Hey Miles. I work at the same place every summer and I'm going to be showing up there again in a week fucking and I started dating this guy that I met there last summer proble m is we really clicked and got along super well and thought it would be really funny to lie to everyone and say we were siblings . So wondering how to retcon that let me know. Oh my God. Thanks . Because how weird it would be like, oh no, we're not actually siblings. Weird. Forever. Siblings in dating. Oh, what? Like, were you lying before you lying now? Like when it went to the lie end yeah lie end. But we gotta get called these people odd. Learn more. Yeah, I wonder if they clicked and then it was like one day they just decided they were besties. Besties turned Hello. Hello, you know, I'm gonna call you back. And I'm here with my producer, Ashley Long. Oh my god . What is up? Oh my goodness, hello. Hello, Ashley, what's a fake name for this person? Let's go trousers. Hey trousers, how you doing? What's up? I'm doing so well . Wonderful, wonderful. That is exactly. That is awesome. What I wanted to hear. Well, Triser one, tell me what's going on. So I work at a summer camp, same summer camp every . And I met this guy there last summer. We really hit it off. We became best friends . And we thought it'd be funny to tell everybody that we were half siblings on our mom 's side because we were both from Florida. Yeah. Yeah. The camp was like states away . And we started dating about a week ago and we're both returning to this campground. About a week ago. A week ag could go. First question I have was the romance there when you guys decided that you were half siblings? Yeah, was there cuddling involved? No way. No, there was not. I was actually seeing someone else at the time . Oh, so he was just Bestiana. Yeah . He was Bestiana. I want you to say it. What did you just say? He was best iana. Bestiana. He was Bestaana. Yes, exactly. Basiana. Thank you . Thank you for saying it. So got it, and what is the sorry, reminding you. What was the name for this person and the fickname for trousers? Trousers and the fickname for the boy Lofers? Travelers Travelers and Lofers. Perfect. So was the vibe between you and Travelers and Loafers? Like did other people believe that you were half sister siblings? Certain people did, certain people like fully thought we were related. Other people like for a minute thought we were dating . One of my friends colloquially refers to him as siblings are dating now . It's a whole mess. What kind type of job is this that you're returning to? We're working at a summer camp together . And is it like a general like, oh, we're doing everything we're kayaking , we're doing like flag football . That kind or is it like niche Yeah, he works he works on the waterfront. He's like one of the headlife guards and I work in performing arts . So I do like plays and stuff with the kids. Okay the jocke meets the nerd sorry. It's like a love that's a love story. That's a coming of age. It's beautiful. So your concern is basically how do we retell the kids that we're no longer siblings and that we're in fact French ing . So I don't think the kids need to know necessarily. Actually that's a really good point. Actually good point s. Yeah, yeah, just the other counselors and peers. Yeah. Yeah. But if you think that actually because it's going to be tough when you just go we're actually not related at all the lunch lady's gonna look at you a little funny. Yeah, she's going to be concerned. Yeah, exactly. And what was the reason for the lie? That's a great question, Miles. Yeah I'm not entirely sure. We mostly thought it was funny . And then it also was sort of a situation of, I think we both kind of had a crush on each other and to both be like, hey, no, absolutely not. I totally don't feel that way. We were like, I see you like a brother and it just kind of spiraled out of control. Hey brother. Hey brother. I don't even want to finish my sentence. I was gonna say something And I hate to ask this. Yeah. Do you guys look like ? Yeah. We unfortunately really, really do. So this is like how do you convince people that you're not siblings and you are in fact dating is really the question. And how big is it? Yeah. And how do I also make it so that it's not like people don't think we're so weird ? For dating, for dating, 'cause they think you're siblfless. So yeah, you do need to reframe the narrative because by the way, let's say you guys are talking and it's kind of like a little flirty and people can be like what the what the fuck was going on ? Yeah without making it clear to everybody. Hey , hey guys, just wanted you to know this is actually not my brother and it is my boyfriend now. What? Like that's like what? Super jarring, I think. I wouldn't know what to do in that situation if I were another counselor, I think. Yeah, I think I'd probably just go like, I'd be gossiping about it. I'd be like, yeah, I think they for sure. Siblings and they just found that they loved each other. And I guess we all have to be okay with it. Maybe it's like a second cousin thing instead of a half sibling thing, I don't remember. Well, you don't want to look that justifying it. Yeah Yeah, yeah., I guess they're cut by their half so it's not like you don't want them . Because you can demonst their philosophy for the rest of their lives. You don't want to change their moral comp anies. Exactly. You don't want to bone holes in their moral compass and you will if you just start kind of showing up being further . What's even worse is that I went to this camp as a child, like I've known these people. This is my tenth year of being here. Okay . And like to a point where my boss came up to me at one point in the middle of last summer and was like, hey, I had no idea you and what's his what's his name again? First, Lofers? Yeah. Lofaers. I had no idea that you and Lafers were siblings. You know, like if you recommended somebody to the camp, like you can get a bonus for that. I did not pick the bonus. It came clean. Oh my god. I was gonna say did your bot, did you take cash for that would have been awesome? So they no, that would have been awesome. Yeah, that would've been sick. Yeah. I think I might have something. Here we go, actually, go for it. Okay. Next week, first night, it's the first night . You should hold a get together at the hall. . Gender reveal party, but instead it's a dating reveal. Do a presentation that's kind of like, you know, lights off, projectors on . Hey guys, I know you know show some pictures of you two together. I know we said we were siblings. Boom, boom, boom, slide side slide, cut to picture you guys franching. Actually wait , waiting to reveal . We're waiting for way too long the big reveal. I'm sorry nobody was surprised what? Did you reveal nobody again you didn't see what stuff is? You go, I know we said we're siblings , but we're dating is actually saying you aren't siblings. You know what I mean? I'm getting careful. We're getting a keep a bonus of this surprise. We're dating now. I need you guys all to get on board. What? Miles, can I throw another wrench in this for you? I would love another wrench. Thank you. Yeah, please. Oh, amazing. So remember when I said last summer, I was seeing somebody else. Yes. This person is also coming back to camp and was very upset the entire summer about how close me and Loafers were. Of course, I'm gonna call him Jeans. Yeah, he's a gene. So Jeanes to me though, knew that you and Loafers were supposed to be together. I actually have friends that are married that like previously had met when one of them was seeing somebody else. And then like that previous partner was like, I don't like your friendship. I don't want you guys to be friends. And it's like they were right to be threatened because then they eventually got the vibe is there. You can't fight the vibe. Yeah, you can't can't fight the vibe. Can't start the filling . So and Jean's is going to be there and Jeanes is aware that you guys are not siblings . Jeanes is aware, yes. But Jeans would be in the meeting where you have to reveal that you're dating. Yes. We all work in that's another we're a type of role called a program lead so we like coordinate everything and like lead everything out and he is the blacksmithing program lead . So we'll all have the same day off. Holy shit. Blacksmithing is awesome though. That's cool. This is tough 'cause it's like, you know, you're kind of ex lovers with the blacksmith and now you're dating the lifeguard. Yeah, this is this movie. It's a movie. It sounds awesome bad. By the way, I'll also say like what type of camp is this where it's like we've got the theater and swimming and blacksmithing . The Iron Cion . We're building weapons to take out the other attacks . It's like okay , like it sort of is hilarious thatacks Bmlithing is a part of the pro gram. I'm in love with that. Yeah, there's also like a farm on there. This is cool. There's an old grist mill. I need to stop giving away information. I'm gonna blow up my spot. There's an old mill This is an old haunted mill . We're going to go . Yeah, we have the kids like mill corns. This is sick. I want my son to go to this. Yeah, like this sounds like a village. Yeah, this is a village in the eighteen hundreds. Are you calling for the eighteen hundreds? So okay, so my hunch is that yeah, I do think there needs to be some sort of assembly. Yeah, like a dating reveal party. Yeah. And you go, hey guys, I have a crazy bunch of reveals. Okay, like a PowerPoint party, right? And so of someway. And maybe it's you print these out on pieces of paper. Yeah , and you go, Hey guys, got to clear a couple things up just because I want everybody to be on the same page . Last summer , and you show a picture of last summer , right I was dating the Blacksmith. Sorry, Jeanes has to be a part of this programming. Yeah, yeah. I also think gic music. Yeah, nostalgic music yeah yeah please don't call no wow stand by M and M. Oh so I think you go you go last summer, I told you all that I had a sibling, but that's actually not true. Cut to you picture as a baby. Okay. You're showing this slide. Picture of me as a baby. I'm actually are you an only child? No, I have siblings. That's right. We both do. Perfect. Time to photos. Family photos, testimonies from your siblings. Yes. Yes. We're the only two brothers in this family or whatever it is. And then you go, these are my only brothers. And I know a lot of you thought that Lofers was my brother. He's actually not. We just said that because we gotten super close. Cut to picture, you high fiving? Yeah, yeah. So then it's like we're just debunking that, right? Yeah. And then me and the Jean started dating. But now we're broken up. Big X over Jean'ses face. Sound effects. Sound effect. Then you go. And then I found that the person I said actually was a half sibling, I actually only said that because we were super tight. You need to lay this all out maybe in a zine or a pamphlet . Just to clarify , the moment where I have a picture of Gene's face and I put an X over it is Gene's gonna be there . Unfortunately, I would maybe just have him turn around. I think that and what I'm saying is that he guessed got to turn around. And also in my mind, this is okay, we're saying it's powerpoint party. It could also be a pamphlet. It could be pamphlet. I like that little zebra. People might get spoiled because I would look through it before. Well, see , that's what I'm saying though. It doesn't even have to be a presentation. It could be just you distributing pamphlets. I see . And you know, I've actually been really into the idea of making a zine. I don't know why. Just to add one more thing to my zine. A little zine where I just sort of print it out and I fold it and then I hand out a zine. And I think a little zine of each page as a new reveal. I know I told you the last time I was a brother. Flip. Yeah, I'd say if you do that though, you have to when you hand them out, tell everybody, don't look yet. Yeah, don't look at the end. Don't yeah, don't spoil it. Because if they flip to the end and they see you franching your brother, then it's gonna be yeah pandemonium. Yeah it's gonna hold it's gonna ruin the whole thing. But I do think that unfortunately the order of operations of reveals are I'm no longer seeing the Smithy . I grew up with other siblings . Yeah . And I'm dating the person that I got close to last summer. Yeah, it's kind of like, I guess you might be wondering how I got here sort of scenario. Kissing your boyfriend. I guess you're wondering how I got here. I thought that was your brother. And then we go from there. But how does that sound? Are you excited about camp? I mean, it feels like so much fun to be working with your boyfriend over the summer. Also yeah, that sounds so fun. Oh yeah, it's gonna be so much fun. Honestly, the only thing I'm concerned about is . Once you get through this, then it's like, okay, now we can like sneak glances. Why did you win the Smithie break? So he's got he lives in England . Okay, I forced the blacksmith is English. Okay, hot. Okay, hot . Lives really far away and oh my god, I'm so afraid someone's gonna hear this . It just he visited a bunch and then he wanted to visit over Christmas and we'd only been dating for like six months and he like didn't help out around the house at all. He came for like three weeks and my parents hated him I also he had no money so I was having to like pay for everything. flight. And he was like, I have forty dollars. I'm here now. He's hitting the broke boyfriend Pose to the cash register. Sorry, he said, I have forty dollars. I'm here now. Wait, he only brought forty dollars . Yeah. He shouldn't have made the trip the day . What I said, I was like , I can't make the trip because I can't afford it. And he was like, well, I can . And then he showed up and was like, JK . Oh, that's tough. Yeah, he probably should have budgeted a little bit. Maybe kept maybe get a spreadsheet, give that flight cash a little bit more. Thanks to our sponsor. I don't know if they're sponsoring this episode. Maybe bleep that . But yeah, I think so your parents do your parents like your new boyfriend They've never met him. Interesting. Oh, 'cause you just started dating a week ago. Yeah. Yeah. This is fresh hot off the press. And you guys live in the same town. Do you in the new boyfriend Lofers? No, we live about an hour apart in the same state. Yeah. That's not too bad. That's bad. Okay, well hey, I wish you the best of luck out there . I'm very excited to see how you tell everyone that you this is not your brother you're dating and I hope you have an amazing summer . Thank you. Thank you so much . No problem . Thank you Vi. Bye . Bye . Wow , I mean just a summer can't vibe. I could picture it all. The smithy we did last summer, but your parents didn't like me because I was broke and they 're English. Oh yeah, we dated last summer . Mom, your parents didn't like me because I was broke. I was fucking broke and now I I''mm back back. Now and have made so much money from my smithing operation. By the way, smithing is that's a cool camp. I actually do want my son to go to a camp like that. Yeah, summer camps were big for me. Did you go to summer camp? I went to two, but they were specializeded. That's why I ask earlier. I didn't go to a general. I did like a day camp, whatever when I was younger. Yeah, I did like a movie maker's day camp, but I never went to sleep away camp. I did two sleepway camps. One was Irish Dance Intensive . So it was just a massive Irish dance thing in upstate New York. Yeah . And we would be dancing day in day out. Oh my god. And then we would do like a performance at the end of the week. And then there was a competition the next day. Whoa, that's so cool. Like I always there was this cool thing in North Carolina called Outdoor Academy and I went and it was basically a it was like a boarding school I went for a day. There was some trip like some field trip to be like see what it's about for a day . R itight was. bas Andically this outdoor learning environment where people were like was in the mountains and people were and that was as close to camp. Like I never went to sleepway camp like that, but I always was so jealous. Most of the parents were like, it's super expensive or like or the timing's not right or whatever, but I always was so jealous of that. Yeah. The Irish dance was fun, but it was like mostly all girls. Yeah . I also went to like my junior year of high school, a film camp in New York City Pace University. Oh, that's great. We take it over. We did a week and it was the most fun I've ever had. New York City is a kid. It was yeah, it's like you're sixteen. You can do it on the town a little bit. Yeah. I had like, oh God, the I think this person still follows me somewhere, but I had like a will they won't day going on and everybody around was like, wait, do you have like a little crush? I might but we just like live too far away and he was saying the same thing but, it was like kind of obvious. Oh my god. That feel that camp feeling like I had that even in my day camp. I was like, yeah, there was like it's just so nebulous. You're like, these people don't even go to my school. Like they don't even go to my school but he's hot. Yeah, it's so real. Like there's something also about like camp feels like it lasts forever because when you go to school, you know your brain falls into a routine, it's pattern whatever. Camp is like everything is, so new and I'm only here for two weeks. And then it's over. And people would I remember I had so many friends that were like, yeah, I'm dating my camp girlfriend or whatever. And it was like notoriously, this was never going to work out. You didn't know your camp was in like Maine and, you guys both live at different parts of the country. Right. You're fourteen. Yeah, of course it's not gonna work, but it's such like a firecracker because it's just like , yeah, it's basically just a pressure cooker of emotion and everyone's like, Oh my God, everyone's hot and you're like from a different state. You're from another place. What is it like where ? And that's hot. And that's so hot. And that's so hot. We gotta take another call. Hey, Miles, so I'm sitting with this new girl and I took a shower at her place and the body wash that I used, she saw it and she said, Oh, I think my ex used the same thing . Should I change my bodywash? It's such a this I love because small stakes, big stakes, you're like, holy shit. Should I change my body watch so my new girlfriend doesn't think about a rex? Well, this is the thing. I like the body keeps sc ore, the nose keeps score. I agree. And like, if you have a certain perfume, a dirt that you wore during a certain point of your life, you'll go back to that time . I think the same thing is true to body wash. I think that's true about like if you're in a relationship with somebody that wears a lot of one scent and then you're like, oh my God, that scent for like my high school girlfriend drove like a like a gold jeep , right ? And then ever since then every, time I see a gold jeep, I'm like, oh my god is that her car? And no, it's just a common car. Right, right . It's like the things stick in your memory as like reminding you of that person. Yes. And so this actually is like kind of an important question. Yeah, and I've been here before. I'll let them know. You've smelled the smells of old . A tale that smells as old as time. It's old as time. A tale as old as time, a smell as old as God. God . Oh , hello My face. Where are you to call you back up here with Ashley Lawes? What's good? Sorry, I didn't mean to hear good. What up ? What is up? What's up? What's good? I got really excited. Yeah, you gotta be yelling at Ashley, what's the fake name for this person? Lufa. Lufa. Luffa, what's good, my daughter? L Luufa.fa what's up? So sorry, give me one second to pull over. No problem working right now. Oh , interesting. Man on the clock. Man on the clock. On the clock. He's on the clock. thirty seconds. All right , give me one second. No problem. Take your freaking time. Now, I'm interested in what you do for work. Me too. We love a working man. Oh, I hear that turn signal . ten and two, ten and two, ten two ten and two H over H over H over H ollywood. I don't even know how to turn the sneaker off . Okay, I'm good now. Oh, perfect. Okay, so Lufa, what's going on with your Well first of all, what do you do for work? I actually do you know those fences that keep the dogs inside the property. The electric electric. The fence is that keeps the dog s inside the property 's inside . It's trying to be vague because the name of the company is a fence to go or no yeah , so do you work for a fencing company that keeps the dog s inside the property dogs? Who let the dogs out there? Exactly. Right. Do you know that the song who let the dogs out is about ugly women? No, I've never heard of it. I didn't know that until recently it broke my heart. I was like, really, it's not about the dogs right now. He was like, who at the end and I was like, oh actually this is fucked up. He's fucked up and wrong and you took joy out of him. I know took the joy away. I thought it was about my dog s, like my boys. Yeah, who let the dogs own? Who were out on the town? Who let the dogs out? And I was like, Oh yeah, we're out. We woofing, right? Yeah, we're woofing on. And no, it's actually taking women down a peg, which is bad. And we ate a food misogyny alert. Lufa, what's going on with your new relations? And how did you meet this person? You know, I went on the apps for the first time. Okay. And yeah, we just sparked it up and yep, things were just flying good and we kind of just met up. Nice. How long have you been seeing this person? It's about a month now. Can I ask a question? Please. What was like your go to message? To them? That's helpful. It's so funny. I was actually listening to your podcast . And you guys were talking about phenomenons. Yeah, you were talking about that phenomenon where like electricity your story. Oh yeah, with your brother. Yes. And I saw her and I messaged her, hey, have you ever experienced any kind of phenomenons in your life? Oh my God . That's exactly right. Oh my God. That's manning. So thank you Miles. Thank you for that. Yeah, I'm happy to wing man, dude. I'm happy out there. So you were like, yo, phenomenon. I'm a femin phenomenon. So you were always gonna say that's a good question, though. Have you ever witnessed a phenomenon? Is kind of a cool everyone's gonna be like, yeah, I did. Like I saw this crazy thing. Yeah, what a ghost count is that a ghost. I've had phenomenon. What's the definition of a phenomenon? Something that's like unprecedented or something. Yeah , it's a phenomenon. But if you told somebody else, maybe they wouldn't believe it. They go whoa. That's the dictionary definition. If you told someone else, they go whoa . If you told someone else, they'd hit the whoe . But so where did you go for your first date? We went to this barcade. So it's like a bar slash arcade, class. Amazing classic. Good class points in you. Yeah. Are you good at any particular video game there? Nice. Not any specific one there, but I used to play in tournaments for Smash Brothers. You did. You played Smash Melee. You played melee, I'm guessing it was melee. Yeah. Sash her in the fucking chat, brother. Okay, we're smashing. I'm derailing this when I need a mess. You're smashing . Wasn't nobody like Metonite, but I know that's really an ultimate dude. That's not the melee. Oh my god, we met 's not in Melee . Metonite's that new dude dude, it's all Falco, it's all Starfox, it's all Yoshi. Yeah, you know, see, I've only played Smash Switch recently and I will side be Meta Knight and everybody hates me. No, the thing about Smash Melee is that it's actually not about fun, it's about getting it right . It's not about fun, it's about the graph. Do you agree, Lufa ? Oh, absolutely. You do not want to go in there and expecting fun. Exactly. So it's not a job. Dude, John and my boy, Luke all play they play smash. They're just like, it's not fun. It's a job. It's homework, it's homework. But okay, so who is your smash main and then we'll get into it? You would then get into the body wash of it all. You'll have to guess, and I'm sure you'll get it, you know, first picked. Captain Falcon ? No, it's actually Fox. Fox, yeah, the Fox Classic. I mean, it's that's awesome and I love to hear it. But so you've seen this new girl and you've been seeing it for like a month or so, you're hanging out and you were showering she was showing at your place or you were showering at her place. Why don't you tell me the body wash situation? Yeah, so we went on a hike and we went back to her place and I said, Hey, I kind of want to take a shower . So yeah I wanted to take a shower. So you took a shower at her place and then her ex's body wash was in the shower . No, no, so she saw the type of body wash that I used and she said, you know, I think my ex used the same one and they've been together for six years. They recently broke up. But you brought the body washes BYOBW A, pretty much. I was expecting to go to her place afterwards. What? Did you just have that shit on you? I love this. Did you keep the body wash? You brought the body wash because you're like, I'm gonna wash myself after the hike. You knew this before hand? Yes. So you had that shit on you. You had that shit on you. And then you brought that. You keep that shit on you brought yourself. And what type of body army mount and so what type of body wash do you use? That the ex used ? I get mine from Bath and Body Works. King. So it's a bath of taste. And it's a bath and body and there's a scent associated or is there a type ? Yeah, I mean it's called Bourbon . Bourbon? Oh yeah, that is an ex smell. Yeah it is yeah, it's smell sorry it's you don't want to be smelling like ex boyfriend . No you don',t. And that body wash kind of had six years on you. That's what I'm saying. Like six years is a long time to be smelling like the ax from yesterday. Yeah, yeah, it's it's tough. I personally I',ve gone through this. I can say. Really? Yeah, I used to use the same body wash as my ex boyfriend. It was the method coconut wash. And it smells delightful. Did you have to change after the relationship ended? Yeah, I can't use it anymore because it will bring me back to that time . And it's like instant. It's like, I don't know if my smell receptors are fucked up. Yeah, no. But it's one of those things where it's like, I will smell it, even like sometimes I will be passing it by in like a CVS and I'll be like, I just want to smell it because it smells so good. And I'll get a whiff and I go, fuck, I can't do that. And you're like, What do I do? Too close. Yeah, I go, yeah, I can't use it. That's so funny. I love that. Okay, so yeah, I think that unfortunately if I were you, I probably would switch it up. How long have you been using the body wash? It's been a couple of years now. Yeah, yeah. You have like an emotional attachment to it? Yeah . No, no, no , but it sucks because I just I just bought some and I got a two for one deal. So now I'm just kind of stuck with them. Here's the thing though, you're gonna have to ask is the two for one, what is it? What was it nine nine fifty for a big old jug of wash? Is that button there? Huh? I thought you always said but jug a butt . But wash. But my question for you is, is the nine hundred fifty going to be worth the entire relationship because she's going to be smelling her ex on your neck and you know that you want to be smelling new and fresh and flirty and fun. You come back from a hike, you want to come out smelling like something gorgeous that doesn't smell like old ex boyfriend. You need to like imprint on her senses Okay. It's like a wolf smirking . Yes, I got a couple recommendations here. Oh yeah, it's like a wolf marking its territory but instead of pissing, you're gonna be wearing a new bodywash bodywash. I think I'm sort of a like okay, my wife felt like a rose sent to bodywash. I didn't like that. That's not really the scent I want to be wearing. I like to smell that, but I don't wanna have it on me. It's usually very pungent. A rose is like almost a punch in the face if you don't like it. Yeah. Now, I'm kind of partial to like I like a citrus. I think there's something you like citrus. I'll go like citrus and musk native body wash. Oh that's what I do recently I did like and then I did their autumn like kind of like fall colony one I'll go citrus or that because I think that when I want to smell like something, I want it to be something fresh. You like a fresh? I want to be fresh. I like a sandal wood or sandal. A scentle? Is it centale? Sorry, egg on your face. Sintall intall. Loosen. Sleep that leave it. Yeah, like I like a scent tall, I like a sandalwood. I like something woodsy. But I think really though like if it's Cologne, in my mind, you need to go the opposite direction. For wash? If the ex if the girlfriend is smelling, you know, what was it? Because it's bourbon because it's bourbon. Bourbon you something completely different that doesn't touch the senses like that. Exactly. I see. Yeah. I see sea foam . Wintergreen. Yeah, a sea foam or like old spice has one that is kind of like a coconut tropical fresh. Oh, I like that oh my god, also that lather on it . Oh my god, it lathers up nice. The bubbles on that thing are crazy . Sounds like you were like a gopher lathering . But I think it's got to be yeah, to me you just want to smell new and fresh so that she doesn't smell your boyfriend on you. Because if you smell like a boyfriend, she might be like actually oh this is more of the same. I'm going to be moving on. Yeah, what do you like about this person by the way? Oh , you know, she's just very mellow. We kind of grew up the same, you know, despite us being in different parts of the countries when we were younger. That's nice. So I would just tell her like things that happened to me growing up and she was like, there's no way that happened to me too . So it was just a whole vibe miles. Oh, that's quick. That's beautiful. Honestly, me and my wife felt the same way where it was like, we just grew up so similarly that it was like, oh my gosh we have so, much in common like. It you' alsready have, an understanding with the person before you've even had or an experience together. So important. You know, I think that's so important. So my pitch for you is gonna be or you could, I mean, how do we feel about vanilla body wash? I'm not a fan I like vanilla . You know, I'm willing to try anything I don't know if you were asking me I think I was. And I answered. And then I'm so no, I asked everybody who was asking the room. I want you to just go, what do you want me to smell? How's this ? You go over and you go. What do you want me to smell like baby? Oh god. I don't know if I like that. Is that too much? I mean is it too much? I think it's kind of you be might able to, I think I just wasn't expecting it and I think it was just a little unexpected. What are you smellin' baby? Hey, sniff me, baby. What do you want? You smell that? It's me. Hey, good looking sniff me up. Hey, good looking why you smell me. I also okay, I'm stopping. You just vomited. I just vomited . I also have a something that you can do with the old body wash as well. I think you can still use it in secret on nights alone When you're on your lonesome, I think you can still use it and sneak it around so that wash you can butt wash it and yeah you I think when she're not like spending the night with her or you're not going to see her later. And you're just gonna kind of roll around in your sheets later that night and kind of do cricket feet and go to bed and by yourself. Who's cricketed feet? You've never done cricket feet? Is that where you move your feet? Sorry, dogs . Oh my God. Yes, it's when you do this under the covers. Oh, on your own food. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. You could also use it to wash your dishes so they smell like I don't know if I'd suggest that one. Is that a hazard? It might be. Body washing your dishes ? Yeah, I feel like it's not gonna get the grime off there. But it will make them smell like bourbon. It will make them smell like bourbon and then you're probably gonna eat some soap later. Do you think maybe that's a good point? Do you think that the ex boyfriend maybe just smelled like bourbon? He just drank a lot. It smells like bourbon. Well, thank you so much for giving us a call here, Luf. I really appreciate it. And I think you're gonna do amazing giving those dog fences out to the public and changing your body wash to a citrusy slash ocean spray. Cranberry . Well, imagine smelling like cranberry juice. I see it smell sticky. Yeah, you'd smell sticky Thanks for having me, Males. I appreciate you calling back. Thank you for calling me, Lupa, by e later Later. Like that. Did Lupa was a cool guy? Yeah, he'd be a good hang. He's one of my boys. Anytime I hear somebody's like, oh, I play Smash . Good Smash Melee. Oh , I see you. I see you. Yeah, you'd be a good burio car partner and I respect you. Well, see, what's awesome about Smash Melee is that yeah, not only is it a full time job, but it is like watching it is like watching another language. It's not nice . There's so much happening and you're just kind of like, I don't know how they're how are you doing that? How are you doing that? Too crazy. It's way too crazy. But actually, we got to take another call. All right. Oh my god, I forgot to say but when we first picked up the call for the first person right as they picked up, my heart skipped several beats. What? I was like, that thing where I was drinking my coffee and like this is my third coffee today. Oh, and right as I picked up, I was like I sat. That kind of set forward 'cause I was like, Is my heart gonna stop? That did happen when we first sat down for the cold open. Oh my god. 'Cause I drank half of this to try and clear my throat. I literally was like I just had too much coffee and I think it's also sitting down and my legs are crossed. My blood flow gets weird all fucked up. Blood clot style. Do you ever wear compression socks? No . I've been wondering if we should do that like or like if that would be a good thing for tour because we're on planes so much. I think that's probably a good idea for circulation. Yeah, I've heard it might be good 'cause I think planes kind of fuck your circulation up. They do. Which could also be why the two of us can't sleep. That's a real wo Inder if there's a correlation a really, really good point because I'm fucking getting bad sleep getting on planes . My blood's clotting . Springtime is here, Bib . Yeah , it's something in the air where I want to be walking around, giving a coffee in my hand, having it be iced, and having me look fashionable for the spring . And every year that shift makes me realize , um, I want a whole freakin' new wardrobe, okay? To match that new spring type energy, I want athleisure where I want to be able to sprint , but not all the time. I've been looking for a better fashion option for the spring, and that's why I ended up joining Fabletics as a VIP, which completely changed how I shop this season. New VIPs unlock major savings on their first purchase. So getting those fresh go to spring pieces doesn't feel like a splurge, okay? When I signed up as a new VIP with Fabletics, I started getting seventy to eighty percent off . 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Well, I used to think that Reddit was just for ums about how to fix the sink , but now I use it for absolutely everything , whether it's coffee setups, whether it's mechanical keyboards, whether it's hardware, whether it's building things in my house. I'll go in there looking for a way to fix my oven and I will leave with awesome pictures of cool animals. Redifits into my day, however I need it to, sometimes it's for researching a product, sometimes for advice and sometimes just for entertainment. I think it is my number one used app because it's something that yes, you can, get amazing entertainment from, yes, you can find phenomenal videos or pictures or images or memes, but you also can dive deeply into a topic and get people's personal experiences with that thing. And I find that that's a very invaluable resource . But also my favorite thing is when I'm playing a new video game, I go to that Reddit after I've beaten the game to sort of keep the vibe going, keep the party going, get people sort of top tips or their hot takes or whatever. And I find that it doubles the enjoyment of my hobbies. Whatever question you're dealing with, whatever problem you're stuck on, Reddit already has the answers. Download the Reddit app and get answers on R slash today I learned or are slash explain like I'm five. Download the Reddit app today . If you're a human being in this freaking society, you gotta protect your health, you gotta protect your car, or even your phone, okay? With various insurances. But what about your home? It's probably your biggest investment. And when things go wrong, the cost can hit hard and fast. And that's where es Home Serve com in. Regular homeowners insurance usually doesn't cover a lot of the day to day wear and tear. 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So that was a time when I probably could use Home Serve . Join the millions of customers who trust Home Serve for fifty percent less your first year. Go to home serve dot com slash perfect person. That's Home Serve com dot slash perfect person for fifty percent plus. Savings compared to renewal price void in Florida . My partner has discovered an infinite ice cream glitch and cannot be stopped.. I got it I need help. Oh, I'm gonna need to hear more. Infinite ice cream glitch. Yay . Infinite ice cream glitch. It's a glitch of the fucking matrix. Hello ? Hello . You call the perfect person at me to call you back at me with the Ashley Lawless. What is up? Oh my god . Hi . Hi, Ashley, what's the fake name for this person? I was gonna say Tilamuk, it's not speaking to me. Poggin Dos. Poggin Dos . How's it going, Dee? All right . It's HD is great . Dude, HD How's your day going? What's going on? You're at work, what's cooking? I'm door dashing right now. Oh , working nine, two, five. Okay, so have you been delivering that food at the bed? Yeah. I'm literally on the way to Taco Bell right now. Oh very good. Do you have like a go to drink slash bev slash treat that you have with you on the road? Yeah, that's a good question. I haven't done it. Okay , I really love a Dr. Pepper Zero pretzels. You're speaking my language . I always have a Doc P zero. DPZ is great. DPZ always in my fridge. I love a DPZ 'cause it gives you the hit of DP. It's barely distinguishable from a DP. It's in fact not. It's in fact not. In fact, if you go off the stuff and you only go z ero and then you get back on the stuff, it's too sugary. It's too sugary. It's much too much. So you're drinking DPZ, you're delivering DD and you are ready to tell me about the infinite ice cream glitch that your partner found. Okay , so recently my partner like moved back in with their dad and they were, talking about wanting to get like an ice cream maker for their house. And their dad was like, Oh, I have your grandma's from the seventies and it's in the shed. You just got to dust it off. And it's giant so huge . Holy shit. This is something your dad would have in the shed. Yeah, by the way, I love that this is considered a glitch. Oh yeah . Making ice cream from scratch . We make jokes about them like being a dairy demon because like she consumes so many dairy desserts, like so many. And that's not creative. It's ridiculous. Is it like cream variety? It's basically guaranteed like if we go out and get milkshakes together, like I'm gonna take two sips of mine and she's gonna drink them both. Yeah, that's awesome. I actually really love it. I'm walking into the TV. I'm about to pick up this order real quick. Oh, no problem. It's good to be in your ear when you're picking it up. Yeah. I'm picking up an order for believe that . You know what kind of cream I've been on lately? What kind of cream? It's not really cream. It's Luigi's Italian ice. Oh lemon. Not cream at all. It's shaved. It's not really cream. It's Italian ice. You know what I've been on? Luigi's Italian ice. By the way, welcome to nineteen ninety one . I've been frightened. I'm rediscovering things about myself. You're rediscovering in this, what would you even call that? It's not cream. It's Italian ice. Yeah. I don't know, there's something about taking the smooth going . Of course. For hours. What you're doing? Reinventing this is appropriating my nineties culture. You know what's fun? Luigi tell you nice. Yeah, of course it was fun, actually. Yeah, I was a child doing it before you were born. And there's something about the spoon when it gets cold and it tastes like metal and you have lemon that also is little. You're telling me You're literally telling me it is awesome. You had to get back on the stop. I got to get back in there. Listen, you might have stopped, but Luigi never did. Luigi Mangiani's Italiance. Now there's a brand collab I wanna see. I'm doing an ad read Are you there? Hello? Hello. Sorry, I'm back. I'm back. So infinite ice cream glitch is not a glitch at all. It is making it from scratch . And so your partner is making ice cream from the source, basically . Yes. I mean, the problem is that the bucket is huge like making so much ice cream at once where there was there used to be kind of like a limit to how much ice cream that they would have on hands. Yeah . Now there is no limit to the ice cream that is being made and all the tougher ware is in the freezer. Yeah, it's too much. Okay, okay. Okay, so actually I have a solution for this. It doesn't seem like you really have a problem, but I've got a solution for it. So you're overflowing with cream and you're wondering how do we make this, how do we justify this? What I started doing so I have a grapefruit and a lemon tree in my backyard, right? Okay. Lemons, grapefruits, goddamn everywhere , just fall if we don't pick them, they will fall and rot on the ground and they're delicious . So it was like teacher appreciation week at my school at my kids school . So I took little paper like we got these boxes that we had originally put cookies in for like new neighbors moving to a place and I put fresh grapefruits in these little paper boxes and we gave like a four stack to each teacher as like a teacher appreciation thing because someone's like, we cannot possibly eat all these grapefruits. Literally there is like dozens and dozens and dozens and in two weeks there's gonna be even more. Yeah. So my hunch for you is you're already making the cream . I think you get little paper containers, like little ice cream to go containers. They've got to be cheap if you just order them online. And then we're putting cream in there. We're freezing them. We're writing special flavor for your friends and you're broadening your lifeslash commun ity by giving cream to your neighbors slash lovers. That would be really awesome if the ice cream was good . She keeps doing like crazy experiments, like ice cream experiments and gallons but turning out. Don't reinvent the cream. And I've been saying this since the crele you can't be reinventing the cream. What is one of the flavors that they've been experimenting with? She's trying to make this like like peach cobbler situation . And she ended up just toasting flour and putting it in the cream and then it kind of just had flour in it instead of being a I'm like, why not a cookie? Why are you doing experiments like this ? Wait flour why was the peach copper not cooked? No no,, like if she was like just trying to emulate the flavor of flour. And I was like, why are you making World War two ice cream? Just put cookies in it, put nilly on . Oh , I think that your partner needs to be stopped and I think that you need to tell them, hey, look, we have to have a cream intervention because there's no world where peach cobbler is not a good ice cream flavor unless you were dialed in. by And the way, you gotta build the basics first. Vanilla chocolate. Yes, there's nothing wrong with little vanilla. There's nothing wrong with the chocolate, maybe even a strawberry put a puree. Oh, oh, strawberry puree ice cream probably would be delic ious. But I think that it's got to be if you're going to be making your own cream, I think you got to go useful flavors and also the batch of the peach cobbler ice cream must have been so big . Oh my gosh so much. Yeah . And I will say like four quarts . And if we're doing homemade cream, we got to be using toppings. We are not utilizing toppings enough, a hot fudge. A hard , a hard sealed chocolate over top hard sealed. What is that called when the hard shell shell? Either way, I was getting really into chocolate shell. Gus led down in a whole fucking thing of that . It's solidifying as it's going down. Literally no, literally, I got really into chocolate shell. I like found it fucking target . And I was like, whoa, that's kind of cool. And then every night break , I'm going and it's going hard shell. It was it's addictive. It's so good. This is what I'm saying. And also ready whip we got back into as a family and me and my wife literally giving Julian a little cup of whipped cream for dessert and he's like, oh this is so good. Me and Sarah taking backshots from the whipped cream . Yeah . Ready Going, Julian, no more whipped cream, us in the kitchen. Filling it up. I will get my freak gone with some ready whip. Like it's just my God, but yeah, toppings can really elevate a vanilla. And I think we don't have to in the cream . Start experimenting. I think it's an external. Well, I've been asking my son what he wants for breakfast and he goes, cream . That's like a joke. He knows he cannot have whipped cream breakfast. But he doesn't hurt him asking . But yeah, I think it's got to be toppings. And I also think that like share the wild. I was gonna suggest an ice cream social. Really good idea, Ashley. I think an ice cream social could broaden your lifeslash community and it's just like you've got the cream. Have people call in flavors? I want this flavor. I want that flavor . And then all of a sudden, you've created a social event of the summer out of cream. Oh yeah, and we have a badass fire pit to host it. Hello . Oh my god, this sounds like a night that I'd want to be invited to. This is an ice cream social, by the way, really like a traditional idea that needs to be brought back. I love an ice cream social. In an ice cream social by the fire. Oh my god . Not too close. Not too close. You're standing a healthy distance from the fire while you scarf it down and then you warm your hand s. And then ooh, my sticky fingers are getting melting. As long as you bring the maracino, BYO Marisciino cherries, 'cause I do think they're important. By so everyone needs to. I would bring a toppings potluck where like we make a bunch of vanilla ice cream and then everybody brings their own toppings and we all share . Yeah, yeah, standing go standing go from Ashley. Yet that's unbelievable. Really good idea. By the way, BYO toppings, I think is a phenomenal idea. Bapt Crunch. Great. Oh , my God. Underrated topping, Boba. I got