Gary's Joke Corner and Outro

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Check responsse is set upp required compatibility and availability varies eighteen plus Last time on the Harry Hill Show Hello there, I'm Harry Hill and this is my show. It's the Harry Hill showh Hello and welcome to the Harry Hill Show. It's Georgian Wek. Yeah There we are Thanks, feellas Oops, I that stagewit. It's Georan w, Daddy, I know, Gary. And the guest is here. The guest? Yeahes, so let's welcome our guest Bridget Christie. Hei, it's Bridget Christie. Hi. Hi, Bridget. Hey H'm Do I address him or you? Yeah, you wouldn't talk to me if you were talking to Gary. Gary, I think we've I think we've met before. Yes, I think we have. In a cardboard box. Oh, did the There ha pos inter show. And you haven't aged at all, if I might say. That's very nice's only twelve Bidget Is any He sorry. I think he's supposed to say it back. Sorry, yeah. I'm only twelve, Rget. No, he's look at me L with Gary Well, it's polite if you say to the person who says You haven't aged at all if you say it But sorry, I shouldn't You haven't aged at all. Is that what that was about? It was just trying to get Gary to say you haven't aged at all. Gary, you stay that down there.ere is that? It seemed to be bit awkward.'t it? It's fine. Oh All right. Yeah, we sort of mascot. seemed previously This is the mascot.cot This is Binkyinky It just I that a bit much Nicky, leave him, Leave him. It wasn't supposed to happen. Is the tongue his arm? Heh? Is the tongue his arm? No, it's Off you go So I'm not a big baker if you put saliva on the tongue, would you have to wash that after every app? or would you? I don't know where we get that quantity of saliva from. Are you offering? I am quite I was doing a gig the other night and Id noticed that I was spitting a bit. Like not on purpose. It's part of getting older, I think, isn't it Yeah. Yeah, I think so. I've done that Is said you know that because of your? background Because of my age, my great age. Well you sorry, Prouce more saliva as you get on. I think what happens is that your mouth becomes looser And this is I wish this is a can of worms, isn't it? It could be a possible can of worms. You' on you are onour though aren't you? Sorry, would you like a Okay, soor because I'm a bit emmbarrassed about that licky thing. Well, it's the sleeves. I don't want to get chocolate on. Thanks for doing the Georgian thing. Thanks for jining in with the Georgian theme. something's going A tongue's going to jump out. That was suspicious of me. I'm not having that.'s It's gonna blow up in my face or something. It's just chocolate A Brigget, you I dont know suspicious ficious. Is this since you moved to London? from Glostter But you know what? People do say I'm naive Well, that's the bridget I know, the naive brridget. because you seemed to be very suspicious. I think it was the licking man who's made me Ry. On edge. Okay, sorry about that. Now I should have warned you actually We did start warning people, but then we've just forgotten. We forgot to re The first one we did. I don't think you should say there's going to be a man that's going to come out and start looking. Is he a man or we don't know The first one we did was with James Acaster. Hasn't gone out, is it, Daddy? No, that one hasn't gone out yet. a bit They said it was a car crash. Sence's Gary. and he would look very freaked out. By the licking So after that we warned people, then we got complacent or we kind of assumed that people maybe had watched. Well, I think in this day and age It's I'm glad that the tongue wasn't this way day and age the Georgian times. The Georgian times. But If it was actually a licking man who was licking with his I don't think you'd be able to get away with that. Not these days, no. Not with the old Woke brigade. Can't say anything. They'd be breathing down your neck. Yeah. can't look anyone no more Now Briidget this morning, I woke up And I picked up the newspaper, The Times of London from the door mat and there inside it is a rave review of your show. Are you aware of this? Oh Was it in the paper? fourour star? Review Well, that was very that was nice. Of your show in the Marlow Theatre in Canterbury? Yes cononggratulations. Well, thank you, that's nice. You never know what they're going to say, Dar? No, you don't And you shouldn't really read them. But I mean, obviously it's okay for me to read them about If it helps to sell some tickets, that's good is it will. I'm sure it will. It was a rave ofview And how has that tour going? You're right? What's the is the? Pizza, Jackie potato. Jackie potato, pizza toour. Yes. I do love stand upp Yes, but you're brilliant at it. Well, that's very kind I don't think I've worked Well, no one ever works it out. It gets it never gets any easier because you're always like one step ahead of the audience, you know? And they're always different. They're always different. You can do the same thing, twoo nights running Yeah. One night they just don't really know what's going on. No. And the next night they'll be with you from the beginning. Yeah. And you know how I know that that is just about the audience. Often it's about the audiences that I would have a Sometimes I'd have a little film at the start, which is always the same. because you know you probably like me, you come off if it was a bit of a tough one and you think, Oh, what did I do wrong But this film was obviously always the same every night and it would go differently. And I could always tell how the rest of the show was going to go from that orr you can tell by what the room sounds like before you come out I came out not on this tour, a couple of tours ago, It was in Somerset. And when I introduced myself, they didn't clap And I came out and I went What I don't think I can start like this. Did you say that? Yeah. And I went, I'm going to come off, come back on again. and they didn't clap again And so I had to go down in amongst them and say, have you decided collectively it because it wasn't like I was on a mixed bill. they had paid to come and see me and then not clapped me on It never the show never because I had to go down then and talk to them and say But that's a decision you had to make and then did you at any point sort of regret No, because it would have looked I think that as as a stand up, you have to address what's happening in the room because otherwise you look a bit delusional. Well, I just dig in. I tend to just dig in I mean, like sometimes you come on And um, They clap, but they the clapping doesn't quite last as long as it takes for you to get to the microphone which is really that happens all the time. Come on guys. You know, if you're watching this and you're thinking of going to a gig, what are you playing at I did have one on this tour where they'd not played my walk on music And What is your wal on music? It's bow down by Geese. Right and alsoso that I wasn't lit and they weren't clapping. Yeah. So I was like, oh, this isn't a great This isn't a showb start By any stretch of the imagination. that's sort of anti showiz. Anti showiz The first time I saw you, of course was do you remember? That would be a very long time ago. Do remember it On a barge in my memory anyway, the first time I saw you live was on a barge in the Batteryson, not far from here And you came on as the character Rice Christy Do you remember that God, I think I did that twice. Yeah. Well I was lucky enough to see it the f. Did I have a swimm white swiming capa? you had I think your face was done up as a grain of rice and you had you're on a plate through a sort of Yeah, I'd cut plate Yeah Well, obviously because I wouldn't have been able to put my head through a plate. Not conventionally. So I'd made a cut at the back was what was the rest of them? I can't remember what the gags were. but they were rice based gags, possibly. They would have I don't know if you There must have been a reason why I did Rice Christy. Yeah, it must have been a reason It couldn't just be because it'sort like a pun on your O my name name. it could be M most things had a There might have been something Rice might have been in the news or something . You can often find If you're a cardiner an article about rice Are you sure that was the first time? I think so, yeah. I bad it bombed. Well, that's the one I remembered anyway. And I remember the funniest thing about it was that you you were doing it. and it was I mean, it was a very friendly crowd that Oh o. It was that, you know, alternative comedy memorial souff. Oh yeah, it would have been, yeah It's a great night. everyveryone was really interesting. And when it's interesting, I mean, not necessarily that funny And then u about halfway through it, you go And you're sort of sweating because you've got the swimming caple and you go Cool well then We'll sle well tonight I just thought that was I'll sleep well. Yeah. or I'll sleep well tonight yeah. Yeah. And I thought that actually was probably the funniest thing about it because it was Be actually what the funny thing about it was you struggling with this whole Get seat I've got a feeling actually as well, that I was in some kind of box. Yeah. Possibly, yeah that I came up out of. Oh maybe when the plate was on a box. So your body was covered. That's what I did. So it was like you could just see my head. Yes. And I was probably sweating and uncomfortable. Yes. and had it painted white, I think and But I think the Press we all to get Sarah on. So Sarah, come on out and say hello to Bridget. Sarah, are you there etcet Oh she's got the Georian She's come with the Georgian themief as well Say hello to Bridget Christie Hello Bridget, Gota say big, big, big fan Don't want a fan girl but gota get a selfie Thanks, girlfriend, okay if I post this. Can't wait to show the world Okay, so Wh has she got a man's voice? Do think it's a man's vo? I don't know It's been old fashioned Thank I think in those terms Uh no S, you going to tell us a little bit about Brido Christie Oh no. Okay, here goes Bridget Louise Christie is an English stand up comedian, actress and writer, early life Christie grew up in Gloucester, the youngest of nine siblings born to Irish parents No kidding d, her dad worked for Wall's Ice creream. Sounds like he liked more than a ninety nineents when he got home. Oh, come on Sarah. Christy left school at fifteen without any qualifications. Whatsoever? She studied drama at the Academy of Live and Recorded Arts in Wandsworth London. That's not Yeah. Yeah, prettyret honest.re prettyretty much Youngest than nine. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. I mean, I can't imagine what that's like. I I'm one of five It busy. Yeah. ye. I mean didid you? I mean, if I had nine kids, I wouldn't be able to Keep an eye on them. It was a lot like this, actually Because like we made our own Th Things Yeah, you know What do you say? We made our own fun. Well You know, obviously you've got a budget and stuff. So and what were what was the age range there then? Well, there's no gaps between us. So the eldest was thirteen when I was born. So you've got the nine kids. So did you just play with like the I don't know, the ones nearest your age group or did you all just likeen the nine of you It would depend what the activity was. so for things like the slow bike races, which we did. We would all be lined up in a row Nine bikes Um Yeah, you know and you'd have to just cycle really slowly. That's It was like this a little bit. Right. We made our own fun and we had the Olympics and we would use the tops of milk bottles, you know, you used to get different gold top bronze silver We used to make medallions out of them. meal times Um Well, that was quite Yeah Aotic. Yeah. What sort of food was mum serving up there? I'm assuming Mum. Mum would make very delicious food. You know, we didn'reat big pots here thereough, Wn't it be great big turines Yeah, often lovely Over. Casseroles and stews. glorious food one the cheap ends of meat. No, no. That's what the The money that we did have went on good quality ingredients. The prime c. Not necessarily clothes or talk toys. but we did have toys, I think food would be Priority. Right What was the original question? Sorry. Oh, did I hang hang around with the ones closest to me? Yeah, I mean because In my family it's five and they weren't u I suppose there's like Ye difference between us something And I would play with the one either side You know? Yeah But like my little brother, I didn't really play with and found him annoying. And Wow I'm the youngest, so I probably was the most annoying Yeah, so you wanted to hang outang. They did used to play a game called Spy on Bridge, which was to watch me crying at Lassie Th the crack in the door. And then that was funny, I think. Right, yeah. R. G. Well, they had it on a VHS and they put it on No, just if it if it was on. If we were all in the house, you know, and they realized I was watching Lassie and crying. It was on a lot It was on a lot, wasn't it? Yeah. And it's not true it's surely not true that you left school at fifteen with no qualifity. I did leave at fifteen Wow I think I might Is it illegal Well, my birthday was in August. So I was very young in the year. Yeah U I may have Drama a CSC in drama. Right. And why didn't you do well at school? Because you're obviously a really smart person. Oh, areren't you? I wouldn't say that no. Well, I think your stuff is very clever and well I didn't really like it I didn't like school, no. Yeah. And also I wanted to get a job Okay, so but it wasn't like a sort of dyslexia or some sort of I think I have got something but as yet undiagnosed I am I can't do maths at all. No and countt It' two plus two Well, I know that what that is U but I don't think I could do long division Yeah Okay. What's the the? No Unless I'm very interested in something and I can't like reading a book, Ill read the same chapter about ten times and then not be able to tell you what was in it. No, Well I find that. Oh really? Yeah that's encouraging. I read a whole book and then I can't really remember anything about it. Yeah, the main character's name or anything And in fact, every night I go back, you know I might be reading a book and I might go pick it up and read the chapter and I can't remember who who's Lyionaw are you thinking? Wh's Lyion Law? he's the main character. Yeah yeah Or someone says, What's your favourite book? and you go, Oh The railway children Yeah But then you can't remember anything about it. You look youre silly Sarah, have you got anything further to add about About Bridget? Christie appeared adverts before being stand up. She was one of the finalists in the Funny Women Awards Dark She was described by the show's founder Lynn Parker as one of the most influential Funny women who has ever entered our competition. Ny seven. Her debut BBC radio four series Bridget Christie Minds the Gat Bridget Christie's Uutopia won the Rose Dor International Broadcasting Award. Her debut book, A Book for Her, was published in twenty fifteen to acclaim from the Daily Telegraph There's a Spanish version in twenty sixteen Christ recorded her stand up Stand Up for her and it's on Netflix. She has written and performed thirteen solo shows, including a b for her, An Ungrateful womoman and because you demanded it. In her radio four show utopia, Christie covered the melting polarized cats, Kim Jong unng, The Brexit neegotiations and Nicknool singing a cover of the Beatles Here Comes the Sun Is that You're not surprised I think that is exactly why it's Annoying. Right. I think that Sarah has got that off Wikipedia. I don't think she uses Wi. I think it's more sophisticated than that. but what's your issue You think it's not true. Well, there's did you do a show Utopia which covered the melting pololar ice caps, Kim Jong un The Brexit negotiations and Nick Kll singing a cover of the Beatles here comes the son. yeah, but There's only that information is only on Wikipedia. I rest my case. Be Wikipedia is done by just the public. Do you know that? And I've tried to get loads of things off it that have been mentioned And I haven't been able to. because you don't wonder being remembered Right. Yeah On mineone I was a brain surgeon And you can't take it. say you'll take it down and then it'll go back up. I don't want it to come down. I like it. Oh I would have a problem with that Um So you've done a hell of a lot of stand upp shows, haven't you Yeah, I think it's fourteen actually, or fifteen. And what was this the Nick Knowles thing? I like his singing voice Oh, didn't he do here come hereere comes the sun D da d d And it's not the d d I think I think if you play it now. You Who did the who did it then if he didn't No, he I think he sings hereere comes the sn but then I think they it's the tune that goes d d d I think it'd be better if he than Yeah. here comes. C is me the D DIY guy. Nick Knowles, yeah. So why is he singing a beat? Well, you tell me this is I mean, I would have done a bit, I mean, that's a very long time ago now. Right You've forgotten that as well. People tell me also like the rice I haveve known I remember putting a swimming cap on and then cutting a is a blur. But yeah. I mean, someone said to me the other day, I saw you doing Japanese knotweed in a pub. and you had to borrow a knife from the bar because you'd got caught in all this ivy that you'd wrapped yourself up in Yeah That's the sort of thing Yeah, I mean, that doesn't surprise me. No, not me, but I can't remember. No, and it's a very elaborate thing to make up Isn't it for someone to make up I believe that it's true. I believe that it's true. Yeah. Sarah, have you got anything further to add Television Aearances Christy's beeneen on Celebrity Squares. In twenty twenty, she appeared in Ghosts as Annie, a ghost who said four words. She done Task Bastard. Christie's first television series The Change was broadcast on channel four in twenty twenty three. Bridget plays Linda, who finds a new lease of light when she learns she is undergoing menopause Know how you feel, love. I can't focus. Brain fog, M face burning up. Where's me Patch? I needs me patch. If I can't get me patch, give me a couple glasses of whispering Angel. Glg glg Gg. That's better. That's it you're up to date with Bridget Chrzwazzy Fuzzy Wooood. Twixro That's for you Oh, yeah The only chocolate I don't like is chocolate with biscuit in it Outrageous. Really? even the twicks. such a literally the only one. Almost like yeah, well, that's very. It's almost like you found that e. Yeah, no, that's not on Wikipedia. Yet It will be now It will be now. Pople have seen that. Yeah It doesn't like chocolate I don't know what other examples of that are. Kit cs. Yes it was more of a wafer Biscuit wafer, you know Now, um, This channel four show, which is great, of course, the change. Thank you Yes. Um That was about The menopause, right? Well it was about many different things. Yeah, but it was called the change, right? Yeah. But the chase. The change. It's about b. I was got it mixed up with the chase. With the chase. Yeah I thought it was on every day. Have you been on the chase? No, haven't been on Would you like to be? No, I'm not very smart. Well I'm, you know, obviously I'm clever, but I don't have any kind of general knowledge. Oviously I'm clever. I don't have any general knowledge. So for instance, when I did celebrity Mastermind Did you not masind No, sorry. No I didn't I said no to that on the back of doing steaby millionaire. D you want to win a millionaire? Did you do that? Yeah, I did with Al Maruri, right? Well you're not nervous? Yeah, I was very nervous and I found Chris Tarant quite intimidating. He did this thing in Chris. It was very odd Before we went on's very tolerant of kind of Agressive. a little bit aggressive And he did this thing where he just marched down the corridor playing with he had like a friend with a ghetto blaster. This isn't true. true playing that song, you know, the u Alice living next door to Alice You know the chubby brown verion? it Chuby brown Alice Alice Sher is Alice. you remember that Yeah, and they marched now Alice. Alice, who's Alice not that. And I'm like I'm in the dressing room next to Stephen Fryes in the other dressing room, we popped our heads out. We looked at each other like What's going on This is buser. Yeah. It's a bit sort of kind of maybe passive regret maybe a little bit passive regt. Is he trying to unnerve every everyone? don't know what Pany does it always. this is his way of sort of getting into the Chris to. So what would he be like without the Ghetto bllaster? We don't know. I fithful Is he' still alive? He's still alive, ye. How old is he now then? eighty eighty hundred. And is he still tall I don't know all this. I'm not an expert on Christ.. I did become a bit obsessed with Chris Taron and did a number of paintings of him. Did you? Yeahude One of them is newute It was p he wore pants. It was like the rise and fall of Chris Terrk Oh no, that's a bit rude. I'll show them to you anyway, that not in that way. Oh okay. And And u Anyway, I thought, I've got Al Murray, right? who went to clelever. That's very clever. onene of the cleverest people I know. I thought we're safe, you know, we're safe. I had the phone of friend was Paul Hawesby Who's on talk sport? Right, rightight because I don't know any sport in now doesn't. we're covered sport We got to we'd use up all our lifelines. We got to sixteen grand U We've got sixteen grand. all our lifelinees used up apart from the phone of friendriend, which is a sport question about I think it was boxing or something. phone up Paul Hawksby. Hello nextext voice you hear would be, you know What's the Oh hi Paul, what's the, you know, some so and so in this boxing match and Paul goes Yeah, I was sorry, yeah, I don't really know anything about boxing. Well thanks a lot. What a disaster. Yeah. But did you win though Well, we've got sixteen thousand, which is like quite Was it for charity? Yeah Itres for a charity, yeah. Could they get much with that Well, we had to split it between the two chns. Oh eight grand each you know, after tax, I don't know. That's really good. You should be really proud of that. Yeah, that was good. But what I learnnt was that that, you know I'm not great on general knowledge, so I turned down the chase. I even turned down catchphrase Oh, but aren't they easy on that? They're easy questions,? I don't know. It's like, you know They film it in Bristol long way. A common topping on a potato. you know no it's a catchphrase might feel like What's the one with Les Dennis That's family fortune. Oh, I meant that. Yeah yeah yeah. You'd be great on that with your unknown siblings. They're all very clever as well, my siblings. Oh are they? Yeah ye What do they all do? that kind of? All do all different different things. Yeah, a big range of things. Right Um What are we talking about? Well we are talking About No, how did we get on to quiz? Oh, your qualifications, was it? No. No. The change. The ch The chase. Oh yeah. The chase. Yeah I thought it was great that Thank you. You look great Are you fed up with all this woke stuff? Can't say anything nowadays can you? And the food's not like it was, all this foreign muck used to be Oky doky. Now it's all wokey o dear. whole world topsy Turvy and back to front. Then come to Georgian World from Regency Innovations Travel, designed by that blke who does all Prince Charles designing Georgian world, where everything is like what it used to be in olden times. proper food, like sausages, an instant whips. oldld fashioned values like things what they used. Amputation without anesthetic Smallpox No teeth. And oldly time comedians what can say whatsoever they fancy without getting a proper fussing. Plus a woman dressed up as your mum to do up your shoelaces For just eighty eight pounds entry fee, get free nightly shows with olden time entertainers like Ingle Nook Fireplace, Ronnie Biggs, and Dapper Lft. If you don't like it, switch off. Plus full buffet service, or phone for a deep pan pizza with double stuffed crust and a base is stuff too. smallmall extra charge for steak, shellfish, malteses and certain wins. Georgian World, Junction four of the A three hundred eight. Warning. All items left in the room at owner' risk. Survaces may be slippery at night. No heavy pveting, terms and conditions applied ly interventions in an uncaring world Ryan Reynolds here from MintMobile, with a message for everyone paying Big wireless way too much. Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop. With Mint, you can get premium wireless for just fifteen dollars a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying, no judgments, but that's weird. Okay, one judgment Anyway, give it a try at mintmobile d. com slash switch Upfront payment of forty five dollars for three month plan, equivent to fifteen dollars month required intro rate for first three months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. S Fful terms at MintMobile d. comot It's time for a theme of the week The Georgian era Hello Dog doogs, really? I've got the It's dogs Stogs, that's a slight Slight error. tell any I got the outfit on move me. All right. The theme of the week is dogs. Oh, Bridget and we're joined by Beth Bush Kid who is a canine behaviourorist and training manager at of course, Battertersey Dogsome, the best of the Dogsam, the most famous of the Dogsim, and of course just down the road from here Welcome, Beth. Hi. Thank you for haing. you Christie of course. Of course. Yes. and pancake. And you got of course. Yes, you've got your dog pancake. So don't listen a little bit about pancake before we Yeah. So Panic seven now, he came to Battersey when he was ten weeks old and he came in with his brother dumplings, so obviously you know had a theme going. his brother brought him in And him and his brother came into Batasy because they had bad eyes, which their owner couldn't afford to care for But it needed treatment like all around the clock, so they came both to stay with me for a bit. Is that a common problem with puubs? Their eyes, yeah. Eone like everyone seems to know about the breathing seems to be like everyone's aware of that by now, but yeah, his big issue was his eyes. He's now got spinal issues as well, so that's dear Later down the line we've got a different issue, but yeah, so the eyes can be problematic because they're just so big. Yeah. They're just so big their eyelids don't always close properly and then the tears don't stay in they get dry. Eactly. I get dry out. I realised that I sleep with my eyes a bit open as he? How did you find that photos. So who was taking photos. I think it was my kid you know when you fall asleep on a train or something like that. But their eyes did as well. So when they were little, I'd have to go in and shot them. Oh Hies don't stay sharp, unfortunately. they do that. They pop back up. Didt the action? No I wouldn't like jab my fingers on. Y. Good nnight. You don't put pennies e now. You don't put pennies on the eyes. You take me shp. Well what a weird thing. strange. Maybe we've got a genetic like short eyelids or something. Well we can don't know I don't know. Or maybe I mean bit of pug blood, maybe. Yeah, youre related to a bit of pug blood.. Hey, I've got a question. Yes. This is don't, you know, I said I wasn't very bright. You might know this, but you might Do our eyeballs stay the same size I don't know. bab eyeballs. That's a good question. And eye sockets are the same size. Oh wow. When we're born. Is that why they look so big when you're a baby? Yeah, I think that might be. may be. I don't. But then our faces grow around them so then they Yeah, but I don't know the skull must grow muchn't it? Yeah I' sorry the dog's fall asleep there. That was a snore. We're getting back to dogs for a moment He's just drawing it back to him. So what happened to his brother just to complete the story? So his brother went home much faster than he did. hisis brother's eyes weren't as poorly as he was, which is then why Pans ended up staying with me because he lived with me for so long. we couldn't quite say goodbye to him after that. So he came to live with us permanently. your parents want him back you said No, no they gave him in us. And yeah, then they asked us to reh homeome them both. did So I always like to start with a very basic question is a dog. What is a dog? Well, I don't know that Pancaick's necessarily the best dog torought on to demonstrate that because obviously he's quite an unusual looking dog. But I mean, a dog is a four legged mammal generenerally covered in hair. Okay. Often with a tail, but not always with a tail, confusingly. What dog doesn't have fur tails so o f. So there's some hairless breeds. So some of them have a little bit of hair. So like a Chinese crested, some of them have a bit of hair. those ones ye, they ye. And there's a Mexican hair as well Aila quuintsill, I think it's pronounced wrinkled. They look a little bit alien like What do those dogs like actually have as pets? They're quite sweet. ye, they're just quite you have to look after their skin like as obviously they don't have. So they have different grooming needs than other dogs. but yeah I think the fur is the main The appal for having Well yeah, but if you' you know, some people are allerged to dog first so the boald one would be perfect. And someone I think you have to rub you have to rub suntan motion into them. Yeah, so you have to give them all kinds of like treatment for their skin and otherwise it can get like they can get all sorts of skin conditions if you don't look after them properly, so ye. And is the fur bred out of them or do they naturally not have fur? Well' I mean, the breeds have been around for quite a long time, but yeah so they must have been selectively bred that Because I think it's's true pancakes contributing. I think it's true, isn't it that all dogs have a common ancestry in that they are descended from wolves. Is that correct? Yes. relate to possibly with this creature next to me right now. But yeah that there's obviously different theories of evolution. so the most common one would be that We obviously had little clusters of groups of people and the dog the wolves started to notice that we had food and we were good at hunting. They would hang around a lot. and at first, obviously that probably was quite annoying, like it can be when your dog's in the kitchen following you around. But over time realized we could work together and hunt together and that was how They change to be kind of more collaborative animals than a wolf is really over a long, long time. Yeah, about the long, long time. So how long I mean, how long have these sort of breeds like the pug, these sort of I would say perhaps more extreme looking Rzo or more you know, extremely different to the Wolf, I suppose, is what I'm saying You know, at the poodle, the pg thereer, I don't know. Dashed? The dash Quite different from a wolf O the Heress dog. Over what period of time have those been bred I mean, that's thousands of years really. So pugs are actually quite an old breed, very old breed, they weren't as extreme forever. Yeah, in China, they've existed for a really long time. but when you look at the old very old paintings of them, they kind of have almost like a teriory kind of face. It's not as squished as it is now and extreme. Yeah. We're Dashand's bred to get into pipes and stuff. intont like sets and dens and things they're hunting animals, yeah Yeah for retrieving fat birgs from pipes The jewely Jewellery from the Ube endnd of the of the toilet. Yeah badg isn't it Dackson? badgget hunter, ye. Yeah. Yeah, lots of different and u But really what your main sort of thing is about training dogses isn't it? Yeah, ye and helping them if they've got behavioral needs prior to rehoming. and post rehoming, we offer a lot of advice to people who have taken dogs from us and we're helping members of the public now as well who haven't actually brought their dog to us at all, which is great because obviously we We would hope to not have to have people's dogs given in to us because of their behaviour. So a lot of what we do now is helping people and hopefully stopping them having to rehome them at all. Yeah. Be that is a tricky sort of balance, I suppose' b to see with any dog's home is that you sort of want dogs because you're a dog's home You wouldn't want it like an empty dogzone but obviously in some ways that would be the ideal. It wouldd be brilliant if there was no demand for kennels and things. That would be fantastic. Yeah. So yeah, all about trying to stop dogs having to come into a kennel environment if they can and stay with their original owners because obviously that would be ideal goal? Yeah, a lot better. Now with Pancake, did she have any behavioral problems when she arrived? No, other than being quite lazy. I have met you know we talked about this earlier, but I have met Pancake before. Have you? Yes, because Mum wanted a dog and we went to Bat to sea and it was when Paul O'Grady was doing the the TV shows. and sort of quid pro quo in a way. I had to be sort of filmed with a few dogs on the floor in exchange for them finding me a nice dog for my mum I've simplified it No. And so I had to sort of roll around on the floor and they'd let very I think there was two, I think. Pancake and Allie's dogiees, two p. They were very l they were very licky. Yeah, yeah. he's calmed down a bit in the last few years. How would you stop a dog from sort of licking your face? licking faces Yeah. So the trick with whyy dogs like it is there's a lot of like pheromones and things that come out from higher up your bation, but also we obviously react to it as well. So I mean the main thing would be not reacting to it because even while we do this, to them that's still getting attention and like fussing and stimulation and things from us. So just stand up and walk away if you don't want them doing it. them easier yourself in some sort of You know, that stuff that you P on your fingerils to stop. Compound W. Comound W I mean, I think that would have other downsides possibly for you. But I mean you could, it just wouldn't necessarily stop because the trouble is with some dogs they like weird tastes, so that doesn't always work totally well either. What do you think of Graham on behaving badly? Is it great? behaving badly . Well, we Graham. Grab Ho. The guy, yeah. We obviously have M own training advice that we we give and we're pretty much based in positive reinforcement and Force three as well, which a lot of dog trading shows It doesn't always capture well on camera because it can take quite a long time to do that type of training. So a lot of dog training shows will not always feature the same kinds of training because it doesn't always brilliantly you see what I?cause, obvly be able to intoiew and fix it really for. Right, yeah, yeah. becausecause it seems to me his advice is pretty much always just ignore it don't don't look at it don't give it any attent. you know there's a dog He chews up the sofa. Have you seen that one? That's good No Yeah. There's a dog sort of attachs the sofa every time he goes out and I theyd have to buy a new sofa and they Lucky he's not here sofa Oh we've got to buy a new sofa. And what he always says is just just ignore it, don't you know That could be expensive, I suppose For sofas. Do you think there will come a day when we don't have pets at all Interesting. Wow I don't know, because so a lot of people aren't comfortable with the idea of things are they? Be a lot of people won't call themselves their dog's owner and things that a carer and that language has changed. For what reason? Because I think people don't like to think of them as a possession, like a belonging. so the word owner kind of implies like a handbag or something that you would own and so a lot of people don't like that phrase so possibly. It like a captive you're holding something cap. I mean I've got pets so cats, right? Yeah ye. But it's like You know, people think having birds in cages is not quite right. Whereas in the seventies everyone had a budgie, didn't they? Yeah. And then I just wonder if people will go, hang on, you want've got a g and you keep it inside a. You take every on a lead, what? Yeah. I wonder if we'll ever get to that point maybe. If there's no more zoos and no more pets. It's not quite the same withith a bird because you think, well, a bird, you know, it's got the whole sky to play in Yeah And you're keeping him in a little cage slightly different. With a dog you know, you just let him off the l runs around and comes back, you're giving him, you know he's getting something out of it as well. I think that it is quite a circular relationship in that way, isn't it? Because I think if we could all choose to be our pet dog, we probably would, right? You just go for a little potter and you get all your food and your eatings given to you and you get to sleep in a bed or on the sofa or wherever they sleep So it probably toys as well. It's probably quite a good deal. Yes, he loves it toys Yeah. so but so your training methods are positive. So that's like treat sausages, is it? Yeah and like management, a lot of the situation. like so a lot of the time you can set something up well. So say like he's on a He's not obviously not about to go running off camera. But if we wanted him to stay with us, we're keeping him on the lead rather than yelling at him because he's runa away kind of thing, obiously he's not about to go anywhere. but you can use management to kind of support quite a lot of behavior concerns as well. prevent the dog doing what it is you don't want them to do and then you use the treats, the toys, the pise, whatever it is you're going to use to reward what you do want them to do instead. And what are the commonist in your experience, the commonist behavioural problems Barking Probably the next It can be quite annoying We've got we have two dogs I snowy, Ii Wilson, if you're watching And we have a fox. they won't be. There's a fox comes in the garden, o? fine I haven't got a problem with that but of course they just bark and bark and bark., How can we stop that Wow, so is it because they see the fox or hear it Well I don't know why. I mean, whether they hear it first and then see it or see it and then Is it always in the same part of the house that they bark in? Yeah So I'm assuming it's like a patio door or something. So if there's certain times you got too much away just in case you know burglers. Yeah. Souting. We have got, you know. They're massive dogs, yeah. huge Yeah massiveg aggressive dogs. I mean, what a lot of people do for things like that, you can buy like film mists that only like obscure the bottom part. so you can see we don't really want to I mean, we could pull the curtains. could could could. Isn't there something I can do to the dog to stop it from doing You could teach them an alternative. Oh, o. So that's just obviously it's a bit more effort than just pulling When this is over, I've got time, you know, we're just doing a few podcasts and you know my next booking I think is probably the Wheel in May Michel MacIntre', the wheel O Youve been on that? I got a text from somebody asking me a load of questions because you know you get the text I didn't get a text but yeah. Oh no, not the wheel. The other show he does Oh that. Wh? Oh yes. when they go on the center wall on the phone. Yes. Yeah I've had that a couple of times ye. And then I was like, oh, I think this is the Michael MacIntyre producers or something Now the wheel is paid. Is it And you get a free mannequin of at the end of a sign Oh Well, if ever there was a reason to go on it, that would be one. Yeah You could teach them to sing the dogs in way you could. you want if you really wanted to. Pancake does a version of a sing rather than a bark really. He howls, he doesn't really bark so yeah that's possibly a bit close to that. But you could teach him to do anything instead. you could teach them to go to a bed, you could teach them to the. I mean that would be perfect. So the fox turns up, how do I do that? So you've to teach the teach whatever you want them to do instead first. so if you want them to go to their bed instead You teach that behavior first which with a bed is quite simple. you teach throw a treat to the bed, saying the word bed and then repeat that until when they see you going to do that, they already go to it. And then you could stop throwing the treat and start pointing. That's quite an easy one to teachight. But you want to get them to know it really, really well And then you would start doing it. So whether it's the sound or the sight of the fox is probably gonnaly know what you would do in the way that they do. No. So the first thing we'd be aware It' be a boring evening. The first thing you know, we'd only be aware of the fox because of the barking. so then it goes and you think, right And then you go like that bed. So yeah, and what you might find because of Dogs do tend to get quite irate about something like a fox coming into their garden. So what you could do have a little garden, but anyway. shared garden. You could have like a little fabric lead like this one. you could chop a handle off it or something. So there's like a little easy way to pick up. So you'd have it around whenever the time of the fox is coming in, if it's the evening, you could already have that on them, but just leave them trailing, like you're not holding the end of it. they can go and live their life for the evening. But then when the fox was to come in, you'd just pick up the lead so you have that little bit of easier. you could move them away from the door a bit and then you could say R G goo to bed now. It's be much easier to interrupt the behavior. Yeah. Could you also Because I've got cats and they just when a fox is in, they just like look up like that Don't make any noise. could you get rid of the dogs and get cats? Cats is yeah, that's quite true. Another solution, possibly. Yeah. I've got them around the back ash if you could take them with you when you go b. No, I'm only joking. love the. Dogs are grrey of the dogs. Any further questions that we should ask our friend, Beth, Do you have anything ould you'd like to ask Gifts What Does a dog like the least Wow I think That would probably milk milk I difficult. There must be a thing that see them drinking milk. Yeah. Cats drink milk. but your dogs only ever seem to drink water He would definitely drink milk if you offered it to him, but he will eat anything basically. But they're all different, aren't they? So I suppose that's tricky. My dog Out of everything else, probably the hoover is his least favourite thing. I think he views it as some kind of intruder he must try to defendrance. But that isn't like an evolutionary thing that dogs hate. No, because like the cliche is dogs and cats not getting along, right? But then lots of people will keep dogs My dog loves cats. They don't always love him, but Yeah, that's the cliche. So nothing Like specifically, there's just lots of things they might be a little bit more naturally frightened of. So some dogs find men a bit scarier than women. Children do as well, don't they? Yeah, they all go for a phase, don't they? where they find that true. Is it true that dogs can sense if you're scared Well, a lot of the time That's quite a complicated thing to pick apart what they're sensing, really. Dogs can definitely smell change in like pheromone and all sorts of things going on your body. like dogs can detect cancers and all that now, not now. they always probably have been able to but we train them to do it now. but they also are masters of picking up body language, which humans are not necessarily as good at as dogs are. So I think a lot of the time actually we start acting weird and that's why the dog hold on. what's happening? you're doing something a bit odd. If a dog is running toward because I used to run a lot. Yes and I've been bitten a few times that' a problem. Yeah. I know. It's made me very nervous unfortunately. If a dog is coming towards you, should you just stop? when you're on a run? Y. Yes, because so dogs whether they're playing or not, if you were to keep running away is more likely to encourage that behaviour continuing from them. And if it's running towards you and barking. Should you stop then as well Yeah, the running will have been what initiated that behaviour to start most likely the fast movement. So if you stand still a lot of the time, they would have lost interest in that Is it if you wouldn't sort of go? You know, sort of make like an aggressive sound back and scare it back Probably not because that would scare some of them off, but not all of them. So and that would be a bit of a roll of a dice. Yeah. Dressed like that would it Possibly more scary. It's George, Yeah, I mean, the theme should have to be fair the theme should have been The Georgian We should have had a Georgian theme, but I yeah, I forgot to forgot about that I got me know, I did them in a batch and forgot to put that. Well, they had dogs in Georgian times. Did they? yeah Yeah. What was that bigig dog back then? I don't know. Yeah that one say that one. Actually lots of the royal family did like pugs, so possibly pugs. and Cavalier King Charles Spaniels, I think were quite a common royal dog choice maybe around then. That's test.'. And one final question. My mum maintains that dogs are psychic. Do you think there's any Is there something specific she thinks that they're psychic for? They can sense if there's a ghost in the house ghost in the house. Yeah. I think there's layers, I think, to that question. Have you ever had experiences like that,s. Staring at like a spot in the wall and barking That could be all sorts. They could have smelt something, they could have heard something you haven't heard. because they can hear frequencies we on hear as well So that could be, I don't know Is that luck a wire or something in the house that a sausage or something. Yeah sausage or something outside the house that you can't hear and they can't hear. so that could be all sorts. And so with his funny eyes he has all sorts of eyesight problems. so again, he might think he's staring at something and actually' thinking about something that's over there. so there could be all sorts of reasons they've done something like that. Yeah ye Yeah Yeah. Yeah hi, M. Yeah, no, they're not. they're not so. They're not so. Okay. All right, see you later. What's for tea, Yeah Chen again. Okay. And the check hasn't come through this smoke. All right, talk to you later U that's fantastic. Thanks so much, Beth. and of course Bada dogs homeome is brilliant place for you to take your dog to. Not to take your dog to, but if you want to get a dog. A re home a dog, yes. You' re homeom a dog You have the bean. We were going to get c cats. Oh ye you do cats as well. Yes ye. they all went really quickly. Oh well so that's good. That's good. Yeah back then Yeah. And people can foster as well. So you don't always have to re homeome because lots of people, especially in London are quite obviously busy and calm you keep a commit to a dog for pent eighteen years, but yeah you could foster and then you can have them short term. Like pancake originally was on foster. and then he stayed. ndid. Thanks so much, Beth. No problem. Thank you for having us. That was our theme of the week. It's the H Hill show It's time to play, nameame the celebrity seed. Celebrity Oh Hi Re. do you know much about seeds? Not a great deal. We've got that lovely garden. I've seen that garden I have got a garden, but I can't grow much in it because squirrels, slugs and foxes Either poo everyone or eat everything. Oh dear So I was L pellets, hoping to get out of traps Well, I was gonna build something that they can't get in. Yeah, greenhouse, maybe That sounds a bit. I would like one. Now listen, we've got I'm going to cut this, you know, we must move on, name this So we've got, you know, name the seed, of course, the game where everyone. tries to name the seed. that we'veort of popp it right. This is named the celebrity seed It's like a celebrity version of it. a bit like celebrity catchphrase or celebrity who wants to be a millionaire. And you see how many seeds we got in there thousand eight thousand seeds originally. off course you can see there's one or two of them actually Lift We tat ono the Dplay All right, so look, u You can see there's a sealed envelope What does it say on there? My name? Brgie Christie, so I'm going to open that now. And inside there I have got a cartridge loaded with a seed and on the seed is a photograph of a celebrity. It's your job to name seed And also the celebrity. if you can. all right It's just for fun, really, there's J just a bit of fun. I'm going to press that button The platform going to rise Do I say the seed first on another person? Yeah There's no particular rule on that.. We don't have a rule on that. What would you rather do Do you want to see them first then decide? Okay. Okay, because then it might be obvious. Yeah. Let's play name the seed. the seed That's impressing., isn't it? It impressive've seen something rise like that for a while Have a look Bridget, see if you can see You should have been looking at it really when it came up then. Oh, sorry, what you looking at? Oh the seed. Where is the seed? It's in the middle of the Oh, that dot. Yeah. Well yeah, you seed. They're only small. tiny. Yeah. What it is the se. Okay, H have a little look as it goes down I mean, you know an no machine se. Hh? Have a look. nice and close to it. No, it's going to fly up, isn' it? No, it's not going to fly away You' so suspicious Everything out done was What happened at the naive bridgees Tomato. You you think tomato?. Okay. and Can you name the celebrity on there? The ph You see there's a picture on there Is it It not it's not gonna Is it Chris Tarreant? Have a look. It's gonna fly away It's not going to I' suspicious you. You wanted to use the Magnifying glass? Okay What? You're so jumpy You're so jumpy. That isn't a seed bird. It's a seed. It isn't. And it's got a picture on it Is is there something on there? Yeah. Oh my God Can you see Well, it looks like Sarah Are you saying it's Sarah? Yeah. are you saying you're saying it's Sarah and you're saying it's a tomato seah. I can tell you. It's not It is a tomato seed. It is a tomato seed. Yes. We've never heard anyone correctly. We don't even have a It can't be serious. We don't even have a sound for that for someone getting it right We've only got the negatativees sound. And there's the And there's the celebrity do you see the celebrity? Oh, it's Peter Rabbit. It's Peter Rabbit. Oh I wish I'd thought of that. Yeah. Beatrix Potter. Fr the Beatrix Potter? Was it Brer raabbit No, that's Little Peter. That's Peter Abbt. Yeah ye. So I should have got that. Congratulations. I'm going give you that. and if you plant that, the tomato seed will come up and you'll have a summer of lovely juicy red tomatoes. Am I the only person? Yeah. You're the only person. E pick ever. pick That was nameame the seed. Celebrity. Celebrity scened Well done, congratulations What It's Peter Rabbit. Gary's Joke Corner. It's Gary's Joke Corner. Hello Re? Hi Gary. Nice to see you again. Yes, I was down there all the time. Now Gary is taking over from me in twenty thirty. I'm retiring, handing the business over to. G. Yes So he needs jokes. Do you have a joke for Gary? I do have one, yes U Gary, yes Well, it doesn't matter whether who it was, but Someone goes into a doctor's. Wh Wh goes into a doctor's Who goes into a dog? Let's say a patient. Who would you like the patient to be? Christ Tarange. Okay Chris Tarant goes into a doctor he says Oh, I can't do is what does he sound like O like that. Chris. I'm not feeling I can't do impressions Chris Tarrant goes into a doctor's and he's got a fried egg in his nose. Do you know this one and a fried egg in his nose and some black pudding in his in his ear. Sing goh. Hmm, silly ass Seahorse? C horse. Oh right, yes. And he says, sorry I'm not gonna to look at him because it's rude. Yeah. hello.i Chris Tarrk goes into a doctor with a fried egg in his nose and some black pudding and like chips and hash browns, everything fried in his ears and his nose And he says Oh I'm not feeling very well. Doror Doctor I think he's probably say, wouldn't he doror Doctor Oh well, why don't you just say the joke No, it's just that, you know, there's a convention to the doctor. This isn't one of those To doctor. Yes I'm not feeling I'm not feeling very well And the doctor says, Well, Chris That's because you're not eating properly I wasn't expecting anyone to laugh at that at all he likes that. When you got a joke for a scary? Yes, Daddy I have. Tell me Daddy. what's round? yellow and round the sesame seeds on top and goes up and down, up and down Is it a cheeseburger in a kangaroo's stomach? Yes He's got a bit tied up in these Fast food in Kangar' stomach jokes. I like that one. There's like a whole load of them Oh well, that's the sound that tells us it's the end of our podscarp. So all that remains is to thank expert, Beth Bush Kid and of course our special guest Bridget Christie too fly in blue jeans. Hmster in a chiff on top Popp in a poncho Fluffy darkling with a ball. Butterfly in blue jeans. These are the things of our dreams our dreams of ourreams These are the things. Thanks for watching everyone. See you next time of our dreamam H. is inside this I don't believe it Joel Dumit. It's the Hry Hill show Best thing that's ever happened to you financially. go. Easy. Sold my car on Carvana. Amazing offer. Really? I hit two hundred on the scratcher. Did the scratcher come to your house and hand you a check? No. How many scratchers did you hit to get that? I hit a button on carvana dot com once. Okay, that's fair. It's like the lottery, except you always win N Not like the lottery at all, actually. Exactly inexplicably good. Offers worth bragging about Sell your car today on Carvana. Pickup these may apply